


You Do for Family: Generations

by jessi_08, JuniperP1



Series: Family Universe [5]
Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Fluff, Multi, Original Character(s), S1 Divergent, Werewolf!Danny
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-15 04:21:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 109
Words: 242,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7207649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessi_08/pseuds/jessi_08, https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuniperP1/pseuds/JuniperP1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A bunch of one-shots in no real order following the relationship of Danny/Carmilla/Laura and their three kids; Charlie, Hendrix and Mercy and future generations. With appearances by Perry, LaFontaine and Kirsch. Basically a melting pot of ideas and prompts. Follow up to You Do For Family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Running Gag

“Oh Wow! Something smells really good!”

Laf emerged from the stairs down to their lab. They had just finished their final calculations for the day and were now ready for some well earned family time.

“Welcome back to the world of the living, dear,” Perry greeted them, giving them a warm embrace and a quick smooch.

“Hey,” they protested, “everything down there is still very much alive… except those chrysanthemums… poor things never stood a chance.”

“Laffy! Laffy!”

Lafontaine’s face lit up as Sky came running up, her bouncing curls making her look every bit her mother’s daughter. Reaching down, they swept their youngest up into a twirling hug.

“Hey Munchkin!” Laf said, hitching Sky onto their hip.

“Laffy, guess what?” exclaimed Sky.

“What?” they replied, nuzzling the child’s forehead.

“Me and Mommy made brownies!” Sky said excitedly, bouncing in her parent’s arms.

“Oh, did you now?” Laf looked over at Perry, who was wearing a proud smile of her own.

“Yep!” Sky was grinning from ear to ear, “I helped Mommy make a whole bunch of brownies for the barbeque tomorrow.”

“That’s not all,” Perry chimed in, “tell Laffy the best part.”

“Yeah yeah!” bubbled Sky, “we made too much batter, so Mommy said I could use the rest to make some special brownies for you! So, I added nuts and coconut and marshmallows and then Mommy helped me bake it.”

“Really? Well, that sounds really yummy!” Laf said, booping their daughter on the nose.

“C’mon,” Sky said, practically vibrating now, “go try one. They’re all cool now and I want you to have the first one.”

“Alright, how could I possibly say no to that?” they said as they walked into the kitchen

“You can’t,” Sky stated definitively, with a confident smile on her face.

Sky’s brownies sat proudly on a plate on the counter, set apart from Perry’s by their marbled appearance. Laf walked over and helped themself to one from the pile before turning their face to Sky and biting into it with a smile. The familiar taste of Perry’s brownie recipe danced over their tongue and the added mix-ins were pleasant, if a touch sweet for Laf’s taste. 

However, after starting to chew, a bitter flavour appeared in the mix and Laf grimaced before forcing a smile back onto their face. They swallowed and took another bite as Sky watched with a captivated grin. Again, the bitter flavour appeared in their mouth.

“Mmmm,” they said, forcing down their second bite, “boy is this yummy, but I probably should save the rest for after dinner.”

“No,” Sky cried, “it’s alright, have more. Then I want to have one!”

Their smile tightened as they prepared to power through the bitter brownie. Fortunately for them, Perry had noticed their expression and quickly stepped in.

“No, they’re right,” she said, taking Sky from Lafontaine and setting her on the floor, “we’re eating dinner soon and they’ll spoil their appetite. Not to mention that you already ate a brownie earlier, right?” 

Sky pouted but nodded reluctantly. 

“Alright, well why don’t you run along outside while your Laf and I pack up these brownies and get dinner started.”

“Okay Mommy,” Sky said before heading out the back door into the yard.

The two of them waited until the door was shut before turning to each other.

“Oh dear. Is there something wrong with the brownies? I had one of the plain ones with Sky and they tasted fine,” Perry said with a confused pout.

“I think your brownies are fine Perr,” said Laf, “but I think those nuts Sky tossed in are rancid.”

Testing Laf’s theory, Perry pried one of the nuts loose and bit into it, quickly spitting into the sink.

“Well, you’re right,” she huffed, “that batch is ruined. Sorry about that, I should have checked before she grabbed them. Good thing those were leftovers.”

“I guess so, but what’ll we tell Sky? She was so proud of them. She’ll be heartbroken.”

“I think I can whip up a new batch quickly if you can start dinner. I should have enough ingredients on hand so she still has her success this time. Then, I’ll teach her about testing for freshness next time.”

“Good idea,” said Laf, sniffing the chicken they’d just grabbed at the reminder, “cause bleh, that wasn’t pleasant.”

“Are you feeling alright? You actually ate some of that,” asked Perry.

“Rancid nuts are rarely, if ever, actually rotten. It’s just the stale oils,” said Laf, “and I only had a couple bites. I’ll be perfectly fine.”

x-x-x

“‘I’ll be perfectly fine’… I said it out loud. Why did I say it out loud? I know better than that.”

Lafontaine was not having a good night. They lay on the living room couch; nauseous, in pain and absolutely miserable.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come to bed?” Perry sat on the corner of the couch, running her fingers through their hair as she tried to comfort them, “you’d probably be a lot more comfortable.”

“As much as I agree with you, I’m gonna be up all night. I don’t want to keep waking you up.” They reached up and interlaced their fingers with their wife’s, “and no, you’re not sleeping on the couch. You have work in the morning, you need a restful night.”

The corner of Perry’s mouth turned down in a half-frown. That had been exactly what she’d been about to suggest, but she also knew that they were right on all counts.

“Alright, fine.” Perry huffed as she got up, pulling up a blanket to cover her spouse, “I’ve left you some water and stomach meds, if you think you can keep either down. Try to get some rest, if you can.”

“Thanks Perr, I love you.”

“Love you too,” Perry said with a kiss to their forehead, “Good night.”

“Night Perr.”

Perry dimmed the lights and went upstairs to bed. Lafontaine hunkered in and did their best to distract themselves with a nature documentary on the TV, something about otters. If they were lucky, the worst of it might be over and they could get some rest.

However, a sharp cramp quickly crushed that hope. With a groan, they got up and hauled themself back to the bathroom as quickly as they could manage.

x-x-x

“Wow, so did you manage to get any sleep?” Laura asked, a look of sympathy on her face.

“Yes, luckily,” Laf said with notable relief in their voice, “the cramps stopped at around two and I was able to get a little shut eye before Perr woke and got me up to bed so I could snooze the morning away.”

“Well, I’m certainly glad you’re feeling better,” Danny said from where she leaned against the deck railing, “it would’ve been a lot less fun here if you’d been too sick to come over.”

Laf grinned and took a sip of their drink before taking a look off the deck to where the kids were playing on the lawn below, enjoying the last bit of sun before it sank below the horizon. The telltale smears of chocolate on their faces belied the fate of many of Perry’s brownies which had been broken out shortly after dinner had been cleaned up.

“Does Sky have any idea?” Laura asked.

“No, the girls had Perr’s decoys for dessert last night and they seemed none the wiser.”

“And you’re sure it was the brownies?” asked Laura, “it seems like such a shame.”

“Yeah,” said Laf with a frown, “if it had been anything worse than bad nuts disagreeing with me, I’d still be laid up right now.”

“Don’t even suggest that,” said Perry as she walked up with a plate of brownies, “I hate seeing you in pain like that. I’d feel awful if I’d been responsible for that.”

“Yeah, like that’d ever happen,” Laf said, putting an arm around Perry, “you are an absolute food magician.”

“Second that point,” said Laura as she snatched a brownie and bit into it. Her eyes rolled back in delight, “seriously Perr, if it weren’t for, y’know, vows and all, I’d totally ask you to marry me.”

“No, forget the vows,” said Danny, a noticeable bite missing from her own brownie “Perry, will you marry us? I’m sure Carmilla will go along with it.”

Perry laughed.

“While I certainly appreciate the offer, I’m happy with my current commitment.” She snuggled a little closer under Laf’s arm.

Laf just smiled and hugged their wife close before taking a brownie for themself. Their teeth had barely sunk into the treat when they realized something was wrong. The brownie tasted right, the smell of cocoa was right under their nose but the usual sense of comfort wasn’t there. Chewing, they felt their stomach clench as it growled audibly.

“Sweetie, are you feeling okay?” Perry asked, noticing Laf’s distress.

They tried to swallow so they could reply, but that was the last straw. Clapping their hand over their mouth and fighting the urge to gag, Laf ran for the bathroom, Perry following quickly behind. Everyone watched them leave with worried expressions before returning their attention to the brownies, eyeing them warily.

“Eh, probably worth it,” said Laura, taking another bite.

x-x-x

The next day, Laf arrived at the Hollis house with their two girls, who quickly scampered inside to find their friends. With a warm smile, Laf closed the door and made their way into the kitchen finding Carmilla and Danny still enjoying a lazy morning.

Kicked back with what Laf presumed was her usual coffee, two bloods, Carmilla was the first to notice them enter the room. With a smug smirk, she reached over to poke her wife in the shoulder over and over.

“Ha, told you they’d be up and about,” Carmilla said, “I win.”

“Yeah yeah,” said Danny, playfully narrowing her eyes at Carmilla as she batted her hand away. Turning her attention back to Laf, she gestured into the kitchen, “help yourself to some coffee. There’s still most of a pot in the carafe.”

With a thankful nod, Laf poured themselves a cup. They paused momentarily as they wondered, not for the first time, what Carmilla’s café O negative tasted like. However, they quickly decided that after the past couple days, now was the wrong time to try that culinary experiment. Settling for their usual coffee with milk, they returned to the table.

“So, how are you feeling?” asked Danny, “when Perry helped you outta here last night, you weren’t looking great.”

“I wasn’t feeling great,” Laf said with a frown, “I mean I don’t get it, I felt fine. I had a lunch when I got up and got through dinner itself just fine, but the moment I bit into the brownie…”

“Hoo boy,” said Danny, a look of realization on her face.

“What?” asked Laf curiously.

“I don’t think there was anything wrong with that brownie last night,” Danny posited, resting a finger on her lips as she thought, “I think you may have got yourself an aversion.”

Laf’s face was horror stricken. “An aversion? To Perr’s brownies? Really?”

“It seems to fit. I remember when Nova got into some chocolate as a puppy. Poor thing got so sick. Even after shifting back she was sick for days. It was months before she could even stand the smell of chocolate, let alone eat it. All that winter, poor Chance had to come over to our house to have hot chocolate after a snow run cause the smell would make Nova nauseous.”

“How long til she could eat it again?” Laf asked nervously.

Danny winced sympathetically, “about a year - year and a half.”

Laf let out a long groan, burying their face in their hands.

“Well hey, look on the bright side,” Carmilla said with a smirk and patting them on the shoulder, “think of how easy it’ll be to eat healthier without temptation.”

Laf lifted their face just enough to fix the vampire with an incredulous glare.

“Or hey,” said Carmilla, furiously backpedaling, ”it may go away faster.”

“Yeah, you were better by the next morning,” added Danny, “I’ll bet you’re brain forgets it was sick in just a few days. I’m sure of it.”

x-x-x

It had been a month. A full month since that cursed confection had entered their stomach and proceeded to cause havoc. An entire month and they still couldn’t enjoy their wife’s signature creation and they couldn’t figure it out. 

At first, they had simply waited about a week, hoping Danny was right and that it would run its course. However, when Perry’s time-lock container opened to reveal what should have been patience's reward, the rich aroma merely gave them with a twisting stomach.

At two weeks, they bought a sacrificial tray of brownies from the store  —because they certainly weren’t going waste Perry’s brownies— and simply tried to force the issue. The issue pushed back leaving Lafontaine once again on the couch with a glass of ginger-ale, a documentary on exploring Mars and a sour mood.

After three weeks, they ventured down to the lab to try and come up with a counter. Unfortunately, their genius recipe of hypnotic agents, neurotoxins and a dash of cocoa, for flavour, failed to meet with Perry’s approval. Their back-up plan, Pepto-Bismarcks, were simply unpalatable and quickly abandoned.

And now? Now, they were stumped.

Lafontaine sat at the kitchen table helping Hazel with her fractions homework while Sky coloured contentedly on the other side. Perry smiled at the scene from the kitchen as she put together a treat for everyone for once all the day’s assignments were done. Laf returned the smile, but as soon as Perry’s turned away, their smile faded. Perry hadn’t attempted to make brownies since they’d gotten sick and they couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty about it. 

“Laf? What about this one?” Hazel asked, snapping them out of their ruminations. They smiled at their daughter, returning their attention to the worksheet. There were more important things to worry about than brownies after all.

Before long, all was said and done. Hazel and Sky were sitting close together across the table, quietly arguing over what colours to use on the page.

“Here we are, toffee pecan blondies” Perry said, holding a plate of golden brown squares as she left the kitchen. The rich smell of toffee pervaded the air, making Laf’s mouth water. Walking over to where they were sitting, Perry’s softly kissed Laf on the forehead before tilting the plate towards them. They gingerly took one of the offered treats and absently took a bite as they watched their wife move around the table to where their daughters were practically buzzing with anticipation.

They continued to enjoy the confection as they took in the scene. Both girls were inspecting the plate intently, as if this was a decision of utmost importance. Perry shared an amused smirk with Laf as their girls deliberated. It made them wish they had a camera handy, but they weren’t about to break the spell by wandering off; their memory would have to suffice. Finally each satisfied with their pick, the two wasted no time taking a hearty bite.

“Hey, there’s brownie in here!” cried Sky, with a surprised smile. Lafontaine’s eyes widened in shock.

“Hey yeah! This is really cool Mom.” said Hazel, “did you notice, Laf?”

Laf looked at their hand, only a few telltale crumbs remained stuck to their fingers. They met Perry’s gaze. She was obviously concerned, but there was a definite glint of hope there as well.

“No, I guess I didn’t. I think I may just have to have another to see,” they said.

“I think we can do that,” Perry said, sliding the plate closer.

Laf plucked another dessert from the plate, sniffing it experimentally. Only the sweet aroma of the blondie was noticeable, no sign of cocoa on the surface. With only a second’s more hesitation, they took a bite. True to Sky’s assessment, there was, in fact, a pocket of brownie hiding dead-centre in the square. 

Now that they were paying attention, they could taste the brownie, but it was heavily masked by the toffee in the mixture. More importantly, they weren’t gagging or struggling in the slightest. They swallowed before taking another bite... and another… and another, until it was gone. 

They looked at Perry, eyes shining with unshed tears. Perry looked just as glad before retrieving the plate to put the remaining blondies away.

x-x-x

Later that evening, once the girls were tucked into bed, Laf and Perry were snuggled up on the couch, each quietly reading.

“Thank you,” said Laf, breaking the silence.

“For what?” asked Perry.

“You know for what. That hidden brownie trick was brilliant. Even if I’d thought of it, it wouldn’t have worked if I knew about it. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; you are a food magician.”

“I just thought it might be worth a try. You know, a trojan horse. But we should find out if it worked before you thank me.”

“Hmm… nope. Won’t take it back.” Laf kissed Perry on the nose, “Thank you for caring. Thank you for helping. Thank you for just being you.” Lafontaine punctuated each thanks with a smooch to Perry’s face.

Perry giggled before squirming loose and running into the kitchen. “Well, regardless,” she called, “we should find out.”

“How? We haven’t had brownies around all month. The store-bought tray of shame notwithstanding.”

Their wife strode back into the room, with a victorious smile on her face and a brownie in each hand. “Despite the efforts of our tenacious eldest, I still have a few hiding spots left.”

Lafontaine smirked as they took a brownie. Hesitantly, they took a whiff and the rich smell of cocoa filled their senses. It still wasn’t as enticing as it should be, but much to their relief, their stomach was no longer twisting at the aroma. With another hopeful glance at Perry, they took a bite. It tasted right, like a familiar memory. 

However, they quickly found that they could not swallow. Their body was no longer getting sick, but it still didn’t trust the baked good enough to grant it safe passage. They tried a few more times before giving up and looking at Perry with a defeated smile. She pouted slightly before producing a napkin which Laf used to spit out the bite.

“Sorry Perr.”

“Oh, you don’t worry about that. I’m the one who should be sorry that it didn’t work.”

“No, Perr, it did. I wasn’t able to eat it but I also didn’t get sick. The way things were going, I probably would have been waiting for months to get this far on my own. Thank you.” They enveloped their wife into a hug. 

“So, does this mean I can start baking them again?” Perry asked. Laf laughed.

“Yes, I imagine so,” they said, pondering, “if anything, having the smell around without making me sick will probably help speed the process along.”

“Well good, it'll be nice to put this whole ordeal behind us. I'm just glad this wasn't something worse.”

“I couldn't eat my wife's best creation for weeks, what could possibly be worse than that?”

x-x-x

“Mommy mommy!” 

Laura looked up from her article as Mercy came running into her office with a plastic container. 

“I helped Mama make cookies, try one, try one!.”

With a grin, Laura picked up a cookie, brought it to her lips and took a bite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're back! We're thinking we'll update this weekly on Tuesday evenings, I hope you guys like this new adventure with us. JuniperP1 started us off on this great journey so let them know how much you like this!


	2. Something's Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the first day of living in an empty nest, it's hard not to focus on the absence of things that are usually there.

It wasn’t often that Carmilla woke before her wives in the morning. While the days of waking just before sunset and turning in around seven the next morning were long gone, she still loved a good lie-in whenever she could get away with it. And arguably, she was more justified in getting away with it on this morning than any other in the past couple decades.

On this morning, however, she felt different. A shaft of warm sunlight, sneaking through the blinds, coaxed her to wakefulness. For several minutes, she contented herself with remaining beneath the sheets, enjoying her partners’ warmth. There was odd peacefulness to the house; wonderfully calm, yet at the same time, almost disturbing in its quiet. It seemed to beg to be filled, making Carmilla begin to feel restless.

As gently as she could manage, Carmilla carefully disentangled her legs from those of her spouses. She was glad that she hadn’t gotten trapped between them last night. Laura and Danny both got very huggy when she was in the middle and she likely would have been trapped for hours to come. Slipping from beneath the covers, she rose quietly and adjusted the blinds so that the wandering sunshine wouldn’t disturb the bed’s remaining occupants. With a loving look towards them, she quietly slipped out of the room and made her way toward the kitchen.

As she passed the doors of the home’s other bedrooms, she couldn’t help but pause briefly, looking into each one with a sad smile. Each room seemed like only a shadow of its former self. Only few pieces of furniture and a smattering of personal decor remained in each, the majority having gone out the door with each room’s former resident. 

Mercy's room felt particularly stark. Yesterday; in a whirlwind of family and friends, boxes and vans, and hugs and tears; the youngest of the Hollis children had finally flown the nest, moving into a small apartment nearby with Sky. 

A few adornments remained; fond reminders of a teenager, now grown. A handful of photographs, taken with Sky’s remarkable skill, still adorned the walls with memories. Some fairy lights and old vinyl records, hanging on the wall near the ceiling, had been left behind in a compromise to the adult Mercy now was. Her old bed was neatly made and ready to host the couple for nights following any number of the many family gatherings still to come. It would always be Mercy’s room, a safe place in her first home, for as long as Carmilla had anything to say about it.

She wiped away a tear and pinched the bridge of her nose, smiling in spite of herself. She honestly felt silly getting misty eyed when her daughter was just around the corner. It may have been the end of an era, but it was the start of a new one as well. An era that, with space, and a little luck, would bring lots of grandkids. Carmilla had to grin at that.

Her mood restored, Carmilla continued to the kitchen and set about making some coffee so her day could officially begin. It wasn't until she was pulling her carton of blood out of the fridge, to warm up a little on the counter, that she realized that she was humming absently. It was one of Mercy’s newer songs, brought to the surface by her ruminations. She quickly glanced around to make sure she didn’t have an audience, and fortunately, her wives still hadn’t shown so much as an eyelash, so she continued humming contentedly as she waited for her coffee to brew.

Perched on one of the counter-side stools, Carmilla was halfway through her second cup when she began seriously debating whether to try and coax the sleepyheads down with the smell of breakfast, or to just cut to the chase and go panther-bomb the bed. Her train of thought was derailed, however, by the distinctive rattle and clunk of the front door being unlocked.

“Uh, Perr?” came the steady, reasoned tone of Lafontaine, “they don’t typically keep their door locked during the day. We may not want to disturb them.”

“I’m sure it’s fine,” replied Perry, sounding a touch too cheery, at least as far as Carmilla was concerned, for a Mom whose youngest had also just moved away, “they probably just forgot to unlock it this morning. Or, they could still be asleep, I suppose. It was quite a busy day yesterday. We’ll just have to stay quiet until we know for certain.”

Carmilla remained silent, listening carefully to the soft rustle of the couple coming towards the kitchen. Schooling her expression to absolute neutrality, she turned her attention to the room’s entrance.

Perry swept into the kitchen moments later, bags of various sizes swinging in her hands. A bright smile adorned her face right up until she saw Carmilla perched at the far end of the kitchen’s island. With wide eyes and a squawk of shock, she quickly retreated to the hallway, the sound of heavy breathing around the corner the only indication that she hadn’t left completely. 

Carmilla glanced quickly at the stairs. If that hadn’t woken Big Red and her Cupcake, she mused, nothing was going to.

“Perr?” asked Laf, “are you al—”

“I’m fine. Really, I’m fine. Just a bit of a surprise is all”

Laf slowly made their way into the kitchen, quickly noticing what had sent their wife scurrying. Their cheeks tinged a bit pink but a highly amused smirk dominated their expression. Carmilla, very quickly, had to raise her mug in front of her face, lest she give away her own smirk. 

“Mornin’ Carm.”

“Good morning Laf.”

“Lovely day, isn’t it?”

“Oh yes, nearly perfect. We may have to organize a run later.”

“That sounds nice. Just you and Dan’ or the rest of the family, too?”

“Hmmm…. I don’t know. I’ll have to ask her once she gets up.”

The two continued to talk in circles, both trying to make the other one bring up the elephant in the room.

“So,” started Laf, finally relenting for Perry's sake, “can’t really help but notice that you are, in fact, naked.”

Carmilla glanced down at herself, as if she could possibly be unaware of the situation, “Yes, I suppose I am.”

“Any particular reason?”

“Oh well, y’know, I kinda figured what with having all the kids out of the house, and a safely locked door,” she added with a sideways glance, “that I might enjoy a morning ‘au naturale’”

“Well, fair enough, I suppose. Though technically it’s no longer—”

“Caaarrrrrrmmm,” Laura’s plaintive whine came from the stairs, “where are you?”

A half-awake, completely oblivious, and equally naked, Laura appeared from the stairs, walking up to Carmilla and wrapping her up in a hug from behind. Unnoticed by Laura, Laf got a touch pinker and smirkier as they averted their eyes and signalled to Perry to stay put.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” Laura husked, “we’re still only halfway through our list of ‘reasons it’s okay that our kids have moved out’.”

Carmilla noted, with pride, the slight hoarseness to Laura’s voice, almost as if she’d been screaming loudly for quite some time; something that hadn’t been missed by Lafontaine, if their further reddening face was any indication.

“Well, Cupcake, I’d absolutely love to, but I’m afraid we have company,” Carmilla said, gesturing towards Laf, who was growing visibly more uncomfortable now that they’d lost the upper hand in their little game.

Laura’s eyes went wide as she noticed the scientist standing in their kitchen for the first time. With a squeak that she would later insist was ‘not adorable in the slightest’, Laura ducked, trying to hide herself completely behind Carmilla.

“Carm! What on earth are you thinking?”

“What? It’s not like I invited the two of them in.”

“Two of them?...”

“Hello Laura!” came Perry’s forcibly chipper voice from the hall.

“Oh my god! Perry, I’m so sorry!”

“It’s fine, dear. It’s my fault really. I just did a little stress baking over Sky moving out and wanted to come share. It didn’t occur to me that you might still be occupied with your own… stress relief”

“It’s fine, Perr,” said Danny, coming down the stairs. She was, thankfully, wearing a bathrobe, with two more in-hand for the momentary nudists. She tossed one unceremoniously over Carmilla’s head before placing the other more gently over Laura’s shoulders, having heard the poor woman’s gaffe from upstairs. 

“All clear Perr,” Laf called once all sashes were firmly cinched.

“Oh, well, good,” she reappeared from around the corner, still a little red, “like I said, it’s my fault for not respecting your space,” she continued, expression starting to fall.

“Hey,” said Carmilla, brow furrowed in concern, “you’re family, so it’s your space too.” She walked around the counter to where Perry was standing, pulling her into a side-hug. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry too. I was feeling very nostalgic this morning and I just over-indulged in that a little when you popped in.”

Perry’s smile returned, leaning for a moment into her friend’s embrace before breaking into the bags producing a multitude of treats that really shouldn’t have fit into the available space. Carmilla heard Laura mutter something about timelords before being shushed by Danny.

“Speaking of indulgence.” Carmilla took a brownie and bit into it, softly moaning at the taste which earned a smirk from Perry. “Y’know, as good as all this is, it’s kind of a shame that you two didn’t...” she paused, gesturing vaguely, “take advantage, of having a safely empty house to yourselves.”

“Oh? who says we didn’t,” said Perry, her smile losing all innocence while her voice dropped about an octave, “this is all just from this morning and let’s just say… I don’t need a lot of sleep.”

With the most helpless smile imaginable, Laf turned beet red and wandered out of the room followed by the sound of three women collapsing to the floor, laughing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoy this one. Just an idea I had that would not let me go. Let us know what you think! - JuniperP1


	3. Growing Pains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the Hollis family waits for their first grandchildren, the expectant mothers are getting sick and tired of bring pregnant.

Mercy groaned as she stretched her back, trying to wiggle herself off the couch. She was seven months pregnant and to say it was a hard pregnancy would be a massive understatement for the woman. Her unborn son seemed to be trying to make it as hard on her as possible. Mercy looked over at her mother and pouted.

“Mom… I’m stuck,” Mercy said and Danny laughed. She walked over and helped her daughter up, catching her as she nearly fell on her face. 

“Gezz Merc, you can’t be this clumsy with the kid,” Danny joked and Mercy glared at her. 

“You try doing this!” she shouted and Danny gave her a pointed look. 

“I did, for the same length of time, with you, and I was worse,” Danny said and Mercy whined. 

“But mom,” Mercy said and Danny rolled her eyes. 

“You’ll just have to get used to it,” 

“Easy for her to say,” Hazel said, walking into the room, equally as pregnant as Mercy. She walked over to the couch, plopping herself down next to her sister, running a hand over her baby belly. 

“Remember to take care of them, that’s our grandbabies you have,” Carmilla said, walking by. She kissed Danny quickly before walking into the kitchen.

“They’re going to spoil them rotten, just you wait and see,” Mercy said and Hazel nodded.

“Like mine aren’t too?”

“God, wait till Aaron and Drix have kid,” Mercy laughed, her eyes lighting up as Sky walked in. “Hey babe,” she smiled as her wife walked over, craning her neck up as Sky leaned in for a kiss.

“Hey,” she smiled against Mercy’s lips, “so, I brought dinner and everyone should be here in about ten minutes,” Sky offered and Laura walked over, grabbing the bags from the young woman. 

“Thanks Sky.”

“Anytime,” Sky smiled as she sat on the couch next to Mercy, cuddling into her wife’s side.

“This isn’t fair! Where’s Charlie?” Hazel whined, pulling Sky away from Mercy, trying to cuddle her younger sister.

“Let me go! Your wife is on her way!” Sky complained, pulling away from Hazel.

“Hey! No rough housing around the babies!” Carmilla scolded and the two settled down. 

“God, overprotective much?” Sky said under her breath causing the other two to laugh.

“Hey dipshit,” Carmilla said, throwing a carrot at Sky, “I heard that. Vampire hearing, remember?”

“Damn it,” Sky swore and Mercy laughed.

“There is my beautiful wife,” Charlie grinned as she walked in. She walked right up to Hazel kissing her before kneeling down in front of her. “How are you doing peanut? You take good care of mommy today?” she asked the baby bump, satisfied when Hazel winced slightly at a hard kick. 

“You always have to get them all excited don’t you?” Hazel complained, “not like I need my bladder or anything,” she said as Charlie helped her up and Hazel quickly made her way to the bathroom.

“Hurry up Haze!” Mercy yelled after her sister-in-law. 

“Next time, we spread the kids out,” Charlie informed Sky, who nodded emphatically. Hazel came waddling back over, sitting back on the couch, slightly out of breath. Everyone jumped when the back door flew open, knocking the wall. There stood Aaron and Drix. Aaron clearly had a pillow shoved in his shirt as Drix ‘helped’ him into the house. The two men made their way over to the couch.

“Scoot over you two, make way for the third pregnant party in this family!” Drix ordered pushing at Mercy and Hazel, who glared at them.

“No touchy the babies!” Carmilla said from the kitchen again. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Hazel snapped. Charlie and Sky both took two big steps back, knowing what was about to come. Mercy also attempted to scoot away but was hindered by her pregnant belly. She turned to her sister and wife with pleading eyes but unfortunately their attention was completely on a very angry Hazel.

“We’re just playing Haze,” Drix said, running a hand through his slicked back hair.

“Yeah, we felt left out,” Aaron pouted a little. Hazel quickly —quicker than a pregnant woman should be able to— grabbed the pillow from his shirt and started smacking him over and over with it.

“This isn’t funny, this isn’t cute, it’s not a damn game!” she shouted, hitting them with every word, as the two men tried to protect themselves from the onslaught of the pillow attack. 

“Fucking hell Hazel!” Drix said, trying to duck behind the couch. 

“You suck!” Hazel yelled, when the dust settled all the ‘kids’ were staring at Hazel as their parents laughed from the kitchen area. 

“Pregnancy is no laughing matter,” Hazel pouted and Charlie quickly walked over to her, holding her as the woman started to tear up. 

“You made her cry!” Charlie accused.

“That’s our sign, we’re going for a quick run… or well trot,” Mercy said before shifting, Sky right behind her. Danny chuckled and let them outside, noting the way Mercy relaxed more, just like she had when she was pregnant. 

She looked around the rooms filled with her family and became excited for what else the future held for everyone. All she knew is that her grandbabies would be spoiled rotten if she had anything to say about it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! This lovely little bit is from Jessi, echoing back to the early chapters of You Do for Family. Let us know what you think! -JuniperP1


	4. Detonation Anxiety

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Carmilla is struggling with her own internal demons, she turns to Lafontaine to help come up with a suitable distraction.

When Laf opened their front door, they had not been expecting the obviously irritated vampire that stood before them.

“Hey Carm, you know you don’t have to knock, you can just come straight in,” Lafontaine said with a concerned frown.

“I normally would have, but it seemed rude to storm into your house while in a foul mood,” Carmilla muttered.

“Rude? Since when has that ever concerned you Ms. Broods-a-lot.”

An unamused glare was the only response the vampire gave them.

“Okay, so we’re not in a joking mood,” Laf said, wincing, “alright, how can I help you?”

“Do you have anything that’ll just make a really satisfying ‘boom’?” Carmilla asked.

A knowing smirk made it’s way onto Laf’s face. “Y’know? I think I may have just the thing. Come on through to the backyard. Lemme go grab some things from my lab and I’ll meet you back there.”

Carmilla made her way through the house and stepped out onto the deck. Trudy, who’d been lying peacefully in a sunny spot, trundled over to her to say hi. Carmilla sat down at the top of steps, absently scratching the hound as she took a few minutes to just breathe and calm down a little.

Soon enough, Laf emerged from the house, a small cooler in each hand. Handing one off to Carmilla, who took it without comment. Laf jerked their chin towards the woods before walking in that direction. Carmilla quickly fell into step and the two made their way into the woods in companionable silence. Before too long, they found themselves at the shore of the lake, near some roughly hewn benches that Aaron had made from raw logs a few summers ago.

Just being here was helping Carmilla feel better already. Fond memories of her first clumsy steps onto the frozen surface of this lake, alongside a particular red wolf, floated to the surface of her memories and made her smile softly.

Laf set their cooler down, gesturing to Carmilla to do the same. Doing so, she opened the lid, curious as to what she’d been lugging through the woods.

“Really?” she asked, holding up a bottle of beer.

“Hey,” Laf defended, “if we’re going to do this, we’re doing it right.”

Carmilla just stared at them, opening the bottle and handing it off before opening one for herself.

“Alright, but I’m not actually letting you get drunk while doing something that may result in missing limbs.”

“Pfff, this’ll be missing digits at worst,” Laf waved off the comment.

Carmilla smirked, “still not an encouraging argument.”

“Do you want to do this or not?” Laf asked.

“Of course I do,” scoffed Carmilla, “but you’re helping me out and I’d prefer you stay intact. That and Perry would probably stake me.”

“No, she wouldn’t,” they reassured, “she probably just wouldn’t bake anything for you for a while.”

“Even worse.”

Laf rolled their eyes before digging into their cooler and pulling out a couple of latex gloves, tossing one to Carmilla.

“You do remember I’m a vampire, right? I don’t exactly damage easily,” Carmilla said.

“Humour me,” they replied, returning to the cooler as Carmilla pulled on the glove with a satisfying snap.

From out of the cooler, Lafontaine produced a small silvery-white lump of something that they were squishing and shaping into a rough ball.

“So… you brought me out here to play with playdoh?” asked a confused Carmilla.

Laf just stared at her incredulously before turning and flinging the lump out into the water. Upon contact, it very quickly began hissing and smoking before bursting into flames and exploding with a loud crack.

“Pure sodium baby,” Laf said with a grin.

“I see your point,” said Carmilla, “gimme.”

Laf chuckled and placed another lump into Carmilla’s gloved hand. She took a moment to inspect the silvery substance before throwing it into the lake, to similarly amusing results. Tossing Carmilla another piece, Lafontaine took a swig from their bottle.

“So, did you want to talk about it while we frighten away all the local wildlife?”

Carmilla tossed the piece of sodium into the water, taking a sip while watching it ignite and explode.

“Not really, it’s honestly kinda stupid,” she said, staring out at the water.

“It upset you enough to bring you to my door.” Laf reached out and rested a hand on the vampire’s shoulder. “Now talk to me, I promise not to laugh.”

Carmilla sighed. “You know how Drix and Aaron are headed to New York this coming weekend?”

Laf nodded. “Oh yeah, Drix scored some tickets to a Rangers game?”

“Against Boston no less, lucky son of a bitch...

“Uh, Carmilla?”

“I know what I said,” she replied with a smirk, “anyways, that’s not what’s bothering me.”

Carmilla picked up a stone and threw it out, somewhat unsatisfied by the small splash that resulted. The echoing crack a moment later, from some sodium Laf tossed in, felt much better and Carmilla gave them a firm nod. The scientist grinned back at her.

“The problem is that when any of the kids need a babysitter, they usually turn to us or you and Perry, which for purposes of having the grandkids nearby, is six of one, half-dozen of the other,” Carmilla explained.

Lafontaine nodded, already guessing where this was leading.

“Well, for this weekend, Drix and Aaron are leaving the girls with Elsie and Hunter. They're apparently going to take them to D.C., show them all the monuments,” said Carmilla.

“Oh Elsie, ever the educator,” Laf chuckled, “so what you’re saying is you’re jealous.”

Carmilla opened her mouth to protest before pausing and opting to just glare at them instead.

“That’s a word I was hoping to avoid, but unfortunately, it’s right on the nose,“ Carmilla groused, “they are grandparents to those little girls every bit as much as we are, and damn good ones at that. They are part of our family and would walk through fire for any of us and I’d happily break the arms of any person who says otherwise. They deserve some bonding time with their granddaughters. ”

“But?”

“But there is still a part of me screaming about outsiders taking my grandbabies, part of me that would like nothing better than to go snatch those little girls and bring them here to where I can keep them safe,” Carmilla paused and took a shuddering breath, “and part of me that knows there is nothing Elsie or Hunter could do about it if I was truly determined.”

Carmilla’s fists were clenched as she stood stock still, staring out towards the lake. Regarding her for a moment, Laf stepped forward, holding out another ball of the soft metal. Glancing over, Carmilla accepted it before hurling it in a straight line away from shore, driving it beneath the surface. She was rewarded a moment later with a plume of water and a bang that broke the spell of silence

“What this boils down to is, I am absolutely furious with myself. I mean, I’m accustomed to feeling possessive. I don’t think there is a single member of this family whom I haven't wanted to whisk away to safety at some point or another, Elsie and Hunter included. But, to now feel like that against people I love?… It's foolish and petty and I should know better.”

Laf frowned for a moment as they processed, before smirking softly.

“Foolish? Maybe, but petty? Hell no,” they stated definitively, “and you do know better. You wouldn’t be here, talking with me, if you didn’t; but when the hell has your heart ever cared about ‘what you know’?” 

Carmilla shook her head and smiled “never for as long as I’ve known.”

“Exactly. Yes, you’re feeling possessive, but it’s borne from love for those two girls, not some twisted sense of greed, like wanting to keep them in a gilded cage. I don’t think you have anything to worry about, at least as far as your relationship with Elsie and Hunter goes.” said Lafontaine, “you, however, may start driving yourself nuts during weekends when they have the kids if you don’t distract yourself… have you considered knitting?”

Carmilla rolled her eyes at the suggestion, though made a mental note to talk to Sue about it later.

“Alright, you’ve made your point. So, oh wise master, any ideas of slightly more productive uses of the weekend than brooding and snapping at anyone that gets close?”

“Well, off the top of my head, I’d say the best plan is for us call our respective daughters and get the rest of the grand-fledglings together and make a weekend of it,” they suggested, “really get the grandchild fix.”

Carmilla turned her head, giving Lafontaine a deadpan look, “you have no idea how much it pains me that I didn’t even think of that incredibly obvious solution.”

“Well, I’ve got one last thing over here that will probably cheer you up,” Laf said, handing Carmilla a fresh set of gloves, who donned them without further comment. Out of the cooler, Laf lifted a plastic container holding what looked like shiny cheese in oil.

“More sodium?” asked Carmilla.

“Better, raw potassium,” said Laf, gleefully.

“You mean, like what’s in bananas?”

“The very same, just… more of it. I’ve never actually tried this with this much. I didn’t have a way to achieve minimum safe distance, til now,” they said as they lifted the baseball sized chunk from the container and placed it in Carmilla’s hands.

A worried look crossed her face as she held the ball of metal somewhat reverently, “minimum safe… are you sure abo—”

“It’ll be fine. All you need to do is use enough strength to throw it roughly in the middle of the lake.”

Carmilla regarded the lump in her hand for a moment before shrugging and hurling the ball way out into the lake. She managed to get it far enough that they were barely able to make out the splash from where it impacted. 

A moment later, however, its location became perfectly apparent as a flash and huge plume of water were quickly followed by an enormous boom. As the explosion rang into the distance, the two stood in silence by the shore.

Carmilla grabbed her beer and took a swig, “okay first, that was epic,” she said, raising her bottle to Laf, who clinked their own against it, “and second, no one is allowed to eat bananas ever again.”

Lafontaine chuckled. “Noted. C’mon, we should get back.”

They had the coolers packed back up and ready to go when a familiar red wolf came bounding out of the underbrush before noticing them and shifting to reveal Danny, worry evident on her face.

“Hey there, are you two alright? I heard a blast from somewhere in this direction.”

“Yeah, we're fine, you can relax,” Carmilla said, pulling her wife into a hug, “it was just us. Laf was helping me work through something.”

“Such as a granite slab?” Danny asked, gawking at the unusually large waves lapping at the shore. Lafontaine and Carmilla laughed.

“No, but something just as hard,” said Carmilla, earning a confused look from Danny, ”now, let’s head back home. I want to have everyone over this weekend and should probably start planning and making calls.”

“I’ll let Perry know,” Laf said, a mischievous glint in their eyes, “there’s a banana bread recipe she’s been wanting to share with you guys.”

Carmilla and Lafontaine both burst out laughing, while Danny simply shook her head, wondering what was so funny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Not a bad chapter to post after a weekend filled with fireworks (at least for those who celebrate on the 1st and 4th, though I hope everyone else had a great weekend as well!). Admittedly, the timing is coincidental as we had the post order laid out in advance, but I like a bit of serendipity.
> 
> As always, let us know what you think! -Juniper


	5. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hazel and Sky get some unfortunate illuminations about the facts of life.

Mercy looked up as the door opened, she smiled when she saw Sky walking in, Hazel not far behind her. Her smiled disappeared quickly, however, when she noticed how pale her girlfriend looked.

“Sky?” She jumped to her feet and walked over to the girl, wrapping an arm around her. “Babe, what’s wrong?”

“I… just need to sit,” Sky said and Mercy led over to the couch, kicking Drix in the shin so he’d sit up. He growled but moved out of the way for the two. 

“Gezz, you two look like you saw a freaking ghost or something,” he said looking at Hazel as she dropped onto the couch. 

“Worse,” Hazel said.

“Ghosts don’t exist Drix, you know this,” Carmilla said walking in, she whapped the back of Hendrix’s head, “use that brain of yours.”

“Whatever, they could.”

“They don’t.”

“That you know of.”

“Want me to call uncle Zeke?”

“Do it!” Hendrix dared and Carmilla pulled her phone out.

“Did you know mom and Laf still have… still… I... “ Sky started stumbling over her words.

“Still what babe?” Mercy asked, nuzzling Sky’s jaw. 

“Um…”

“Well spit it out kid,” Charlie said walking in. She’d heard the siblings from her room and knew never to waste time with her girlfriend.

“Still had sex,” Hazel finished for Sky and Carmilla burst out laughing, dropping her phone in the process. Hazel and Sky stared at their aunt, flabbergasted at her reaction. The three Hollis children looked around at each other.

“Well… I mean we kind of figured.” Charlie declared for the three of them, earning shocked expressions from the sisters.

“What do you mean you figured?” Hazel shouted, throwing her arms in the air.

“Well… sex is… sex is a natural part of a relationship and let’s be real, your parents have a great relationship,” Charlie explained sitting next to Hazel. 

“Yeah guys like… you thought they didn’t have sex?” Drix asked.

“Yes!” both girls shouted and their partners started to giggle.

“What’s so funny?” Sky growled and Mercy kissed her nose.

“Wouldn’t you be upset if we stopped having sex that young?”

“You two are having sex?!” Carmilla shouted and Mercy glared up at her mother.

“Not the time for this mom!”

“Of course but my parents—”

“Your parents nothing. They love each other, there is no difference between them having sex or our parents having sex. It’s just—”

“Oh my god! You’re ok with your parents still having sex?” Sky gasped looking at Charlie.

“Of course, mama is like a billion years old—”

“Excuse me?!” 

“Ok, a thousand years old.”

“You are slowly losing your spot as favorite child.”

“You don’t pick favorites,” Charlie shot back and Carmilla grumbled having been caught in her lie, “I would be worried if my parents weren’t still having a healthy sexual life. Hell, even my grandparents I would be worried about.” 

“This is too much…” Hazel said and Charlie laughed, leaning over and kissing her. 

“You really think after we have kids, I’m going to be done with your body?”

“We’re different.”

“We shouldn’t be.”

“I feel like I walked into something,” Aaron said as he walked in and Drix smiled at him. He walked over to his boyfriend, kissing him quickly before turning to the group.

“Aaron, when did you realize your parents still had sex?”

“Is this a trick question?” Aaron asked raising an eyebrow.

“Nope.”

“Um… when my mom was pregnant with… um, who came after me?” Aaron laughed.

“Please tell me you’re joking,” Carmilla said and Aaron smiled.

“Of course I am. Jill is my favorite.” 

“Whew, I was worried.” 

“But why are we asking about my parents sex life? I mean I’m glad it’s there but I don’t ever wanna think about it.”

“That answers our questions,” Mercy turned back to Sky and lifted her chin up so she could lock eyes with her. “See babe? There is nothing wrong with your parents having sex.”

“Yeah kids, plus, you should have seen your mom before she was getting laid on a regular—”

“Not helping!” Hazel shouted at her aunt, throwing Carmilla into another fit of laughter. She was cut off by her phone ringing on the floor. She leaned down and picked it up.

“Hello?”

“Mircalla, child why did I get a call with you cackling and the children in distress over Miss Perry and Ser Lafontaine, having sex?”

“Oh Zeke, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize the call connected,” Carmilla explained, “I have a question though.”

“Ok dear.”

“Do ghosts exist?”

“Of course they do, what did you think Rafael was?” he asked and Carmilla was stunned for a moment. She hadn’t thought about her father’s presence as being a ghost.

“Well shit.”

“Ha! In your face!” Drix shouted and Charlie rolled her eyes, nuzzling Hazel’s neck placing soft kisses there. 

“So which of you walked in on them?”

“Both of us. I need to wash my eyes out Charlie,” Hazel whined and Charlie smirked.

“I think I have a better plan,” she explained and tugged Hazel up from the couch and towards the stairs. She needed to show her girlfriend just why they wouldn’t ever stop having sex, no matter their age. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's another fun one from Jessi. Anyone else getting childhood flashbacks? 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> -Juniper


	6. All Broken Up

“Ugh, you two are so gross.”

Mercy opened one eye from where from where her face was snuggled into Sky’s neck, meeting her brother’s gaze with a glare. They’d been dozing the morning away rather comfortably until he’d put in an appearance. Mercy let her eye fall shut again, hoping he’d take a hint and wander off to amuse himself elsewhere.

“No kidding. It’s like someone upturned a vat of syrup right here on the couch, it’s just so sickeningly sweet.”

Unless, of course, he had reinforcements. Mercy squeezed her eyes tighter, trying to ignore Aaron’s remark and hold onto the moment. She heard Sky growl softly, expressing her own displeasure at the situation as she pulled Mercy a little closer.

“Oh no, you two have absolutely no high ground when it comes to being grossly affectionate,” chimed in Charlie, “at least they have the decency to not nibble each other’s ears in company.”

At this point, Mercy wasn’t certain whether she wanted to hug her sister for defending her or deck her for being so loud. She settled for cracking an eye open to try and glower the offending parties into submission, but no one was paying her any attention at the moment.

Aaron raised an eyebrow at Charlie from where he and Drix had taken a seat, “um, glass houses there.”

“Hey, she never claimed that we had that decency either,” said Hazel, snaking her arms around her girlfriend, licking the shell of her ear to make the point, “just that our innocent, wholesome… virginal, little sisters do.”

Sky burst out laughing at that remark. Mercy finally lifted her head and huffed, before chuckling and turning towards Hazel, “well played Madam, well played.”

“Honestly, let’s just agree that all of us can be pretty sickening when we want to be,” said Sky, “Hell, it’s practically a required skill in this family.

A series of snickers all around agreed with Sky’s assessment.

“Well, that and absolutely explosive fights,” added Charlie, pulling Hazel’s arms a little tighter around her.

“Moms don’t really,” said Mercy.

“They don’t really anymore. Have you not watched Mom’s recordings from University?” said Charlie.

“Oh yeah, right.”

“Hey, it helps make things stronger in the long run,” added Hazel, “even if it costs the occasional plate.”

“One time!” cried Sky, “it was one time!”

“It’s alright baby,” Mercy snuggled into her, “like Hazel said, we’re stronger for it. I’d say that’s worth a piece of tableware.”

“I almost feel we should be envious,“ said Drix, looking at Aaron, “we certainly fight from time to time, but we’ve never had that breaking up epiphany.”

“You’re right,” pondered Aaron, “are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“I think so.”

“What? What are you guys thinking?” asked Charlie, looking at them with a confused expression.

The two men remained silent for a moment before Drix spoke up,

“Aaron, this is it. I’ve had enough. Your aftershave stinks, it has to go!”

“My aftershave is artisanal, you simply have no taste, “ Aaron retorted, a grin on his face “you, on the other hand, keep stealing the blankets at night. My feet have been a set of toe-sicles every time you've slept over.”

“Says the guy who complains about being too hot to cuddle,” Drix said with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m too hot for most things,” Aaron said smugly.

“So modest too,” Drix added, “also, who cheers for the Pens?”

Aaron balked dramatically, “oh my god, blasphemer! That’s it, I can’t be with a man who doesn’t know good hockey. Hendrix Hollis, we are through!” Aaron gave Drix a wink before making a show of standing up and storming from the room.

“Fine! See if I care!” wailed Drix before heading towards the kitchen.

“Oh, hi Aunt Danny!” came Aaron’s voice cheerfully from the front entrance, “good to see you. You’ll have to excuse me, but I have to leave and slam the front door dramatically now.”

“O...kay?” replied Danny followed by the front door slamming shut.

The remaining two couples sat in stunned shock.

“Did they actually just break up or were they making fun of us?” asked Hazel.

Drix chose that moment to return to the living room with one of Aaron’s sweatshirts, a tub of ice cream and a ladle, which he began to use to awkwardly dig at the ice cream, attracting stares from everyone in the room

“What?” asked Drix, ”I’m grieving.” He dug a big scoop out and began messily biting his way through it.

“Nevermind, I figured it out.”

x-x-x

“So… what’s this I hear about you and Aaron breaking up?” asked Laura, a knowing smirk on her face as she and Hendrix prepared dinner.

“Oh, you know,” Drix said wistfully, “sometimes two people just have differences that they can’t get over.”

“What sort of differences?” she asked.

“Aftershave, sleep habits, hockey teams. Y’know, the important stuff.”

“Hockey Teams?”

“Pens fan.”

Laura recoiled in horror, “oh dear. and you still managed to last this long? The things we overlook for love.”

“Oh, yes. I did love him. To tell you the truth, I probably still do. I’ve been completely inconsolable.” 

“I don’t think—”

“You’re right, it’s been hours. This moping about has gone on long enough,” Drix declared, “I need to move on, get myself out there.”

Laura snorted, “oh yeah, really should start hitting those bars. Go for the really seedy ones, that’s where you net a real keeper. If we hadn’t been roommates, that’s totally where I would have found your Mama.”

“I heard that,” called Carmilla from the other room.

“You were meant to,” Laura called back.

“Nah, bar hopping is so last century. I’ll just keep my feelers out. You never know who’s gonna pop up out of nowhere.”

“Hey, anybody home?” called Kirsch from the front door, “Me and Bets wanted to come say hi!” 

Laura fixed Drix with a look.

“Ha, not really who I had in mind, but it feels like forever since he’s been over and I’m not one to complain about seeing family,” said Drix with a laugh before calling out, “we’re in the kitchen guys.” 

x-x-x

“Wow, did we pick the right night to drop in or what?” said Kirsch, happily patting his full belly as , “Laura, you make an awesome lasagna.”

“Thanks, Kirsch,” said Laura, “I use a bit of fennel to make up for the missing garlic that our vampiric family members can’t eat.”

“I still liked that version you made using the cumin,” said Danny.

“Eh, that just tasted like chili.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

Laura just rolled her eyes.

“So,bro,” said Kirsch, directing his attention to Drix, “you and Aaron, huh?”

Drix grinned before affecting a pathetically dramatic pout, “Aaron? Aaron who?” Drix’s voice quavered while his sisters and their girlfriends rolled their eyes.

“Ok, seriously Drix. I think you… can…” Charlie trailed off as music started to play from somewhere outside.

“What the what?” said Laura as she got up. Walking over to the doorwall, she took one look into the backyard and laughed, “Drix? I think it’s for you.”

With a puzzled expression, he got up, closely followed by the other occupants of the room, and went over to where his mother was standing. His face lit up with a huge smile when he saw what she was referring to.

Out in the yard, standing in the faint light of dusk, was Aaron dressed in a sharp suit and holding a bouquet of sunflowers. A stereo was set up on the deck playing some ridiculously cheesy ballad and a path of dried flowers had been laid between Aaron and the house.

Without a word, Hendrix opened the door and went out into the yard. He could feel the gazes of everyone else behind him, but his focus was solely on Aaron. He walked slowly, relishing in the feeling of the dried flowers crunching a little underfoot. Making his way up to Aaron, he could feel tears starting to well up as he looked into his eyes.

“I figured I should do this right,” said Aaron, smiling bashfully as he handed the bouquet to Drix.

Drix smiled at the flowers before bending down and placing them on the ground to one side. With the bouquet safely out of the way, Drix stepped closer and put a hand on Aaron’s face before guiding him into a kiss. He wrapped his other arm behind Aaron’s back, pulling him closer, while Aaron’s hands found their way round his back and up into his hair.

“Wow! We should break up more often,” said a mildly dazed Aaron when they finally broke for air.

“If you’re going to do something like this every time, I agree,” said Drix, a bit out of breath, “how does third week next month sound to you?”

“No! Oh no, you two have had your fun,” yelled Charlie from where the family had been watching, “if I hear that you two have broken up ever again, your ass is mine Aaron. Whether for breaking Drix’s heart or for messing with the rest of us, either way you’ll deserve it.” Charlie cracked her knuckles to emphasize her point, making Aaron visibly pale and nod frantically.

“Aww sis, we just got back together. You should be happy for us,” said Drix with a grin.

“Don’t you think you’re magically safe from comeuppance either Kitty Cat,” Mercy chimed in, “Sky and I will chase you from one end of the woods to the other.” Her girlfriend narrowed her eyes at him in affirmation.

“Alright, alright,” Drix held up his hands in surrender, “we won’t break up again… unless we really mean it.”

“Though I don’t think that’s gonna happen,” Aaron said, resting his forehead against Drix’s temple.

“It better not,” said Charlie as she turned to go back inside, prompting everyone on the deck to do the same.

“Huh, that was fun but it feels like we missed something,” said Drix.

“Well, we haven’t done the last step yet,” Aaron husked, leaning closer to Drix’s ear, “we’ve made up and now,” he nibbled Drix’s earlobe, “we need to make up.”

Drix’s eyes widened and grasped Aaron’s hand, leading him into the house and up the stairs.

“Ugh, you two are so gross,” Mercy called after them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is from Juniper! Hope you guys enjoy.  
> Jess


	7. Watch Your Step

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura really needs to watch where she's going.

Laura was struggling. Apparently, trying to enter the house while carrying three file boxes of archive materials, all in one trip, was not one of her finer ideas. The weight of the boxes aside, the stack was more than tall enough to completely block her line of sight. Very carefully, she had to feel out what she was doing; it took nearly an entire minute to manage opening the front door alone. However, Laura Hollis wasn’t one to admit defeat, so she soldiered on. 

Hefting the boxes through the open door and kicking it closed behind her, she made her way through the house, carefully trying to keep from knocking anything down. 

“I thought I was the one with super strength around here,” came Carmilla’s voice from somewhere in front of her.

Turning her body for a clear view, she saw her wife gazing at her from the couch as Mercy quietly watched TV on the floor in front of her. Laura playfully narrowed her eyes at her.

“Ha ha,” she said sarcastically, “these are just some old periodicals that I brought home so I could work on my article over the weekend. How’ve you been today?”

“Nice easy day with the kids. This little one has been an angel, Charlie is over at Hazel’s and Drix was playing upstairs last I checked.”

“Well, that’s good. You mind holding the fort for a little while longer so I can organise these things?”

Carmilla glanced down at her daughter, still rapt in her show, before making a scene of stretching out on the couch. “Oh, truly it’s an arduous job, but for you, I will endure. Because, I love you.” Laura gave her head a small shake and rolled her eyes.

“Well, thank you and I love you too.”

Her arms growing tired, she quickly resumed her journey to the office. She was nearly there when her foot encountered something soft and fuzzy, which then yowled softly at having been prodded. Caught off guard, she tried to pull her foot back and put it down somewhere else. Unfortunately, the sudden motion also threw her already tenuous equilibrium completely off. 

The boxes went flying as Laura flailed, trying to catch her balance. She threw her arms out in a desperate attempt to grab anything to keep herself up, unfortunately finding nothing but open air. She fell backwards, but instead of unforgiving hardwood, she found herself being held up, scant inches from the ground by Carmilla.

“So, what have we learned?” Carmilla asked smugly, looking at Laura with a raised eyebrow.

“That having a sexy wife with superspeed is one of the best things ever?” Laura suggested sheepishly.

“I said learned, you knew that already,” the vampire said with a grin.

Laura huffed, “I should’ve made smaller trips or asked for help rather than struggling.”

“Good,” said Carmilla, gently lowering Laura to the floor, “now, I think you also owe our son an apology. You seem to have given him quite the fright.” Laura followed Carmilla’s gaze to a spot down the hallway, just past her office, where a small panther cub sat, puffed up in fright.

Laura’s face fell, “Oh Drix! I’m sorry.” She held her arms open towards the cub, who ran into them, cuddling close as they closed around him. “Oh sweetie, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

Very quickly, the small panther calmed down and began purring in his mother’s arms. With a smile, Carmilla patted Laura on the shoulder and returned to the living room to check on Mercy.

“Oh my boy,” Laura cooed, placing the panther cub in front of her “are you okay?”

A single squeaky meow was the response she got. She wasn’t quite certain what he meant by that, but he was relaxed and bright-eyed, so she figured it was likely, ‘yes’.

“Alright, good. Now, in the future, I want you to remember that the middle of the hallway isn’t a good place to have a nap. You never know when your stupid Mom is gonna stomp on through, not paying attention.”

Drix stepped forward, looking her in the eyes and putting a paw up on her leg. He opened his mouth and let out the longest, most plaintive meow Laura had ever heard from him. His young eyes were yearning at her, trying to convey something.

“What was that?” asked Laura, confusion on her face. “Carm?” she called.

“He said he’ll remember, you’re not stupid and that he loves you,” Carmilla yelled from the other room.

Laura’s eyes began to water as she reached out and gathered him into another hug.

After a couple of minutes, she let him go and set about surveying the damage. One of the boxes was on it’s side, it’s contents spilled across the floor, but she’d gotten lucky and the other two had miraculously stayed shut in the chaos.

“Now, how bout you go keep your sister company while I tidy this up?”

Another single squeaky meow was the response before he bounded off towards the living room. Laura smiled before leaning over and grabbing the first loose article.

“Alright, was this under ‘C’ for Carter or ‘P’ for president?”

x-x-x

Laura was struggling. She had a conference call in less than an hour and her phone had decided that now was a fantastic time to succumb to age and lock-up almost completely. She paced back and forth in the kitchen, desperately tapping at her screen, trying to get anything to come up without crashing.

“Ugh, you are making me nauseous,” groaned Danny from her perch on the counter, “face it, the phone is toast. About time too, that hunk of junk is ancient. This is a great excuse to get a new one.”

“Hey hey hey! This is a fine phone,“ rebutted Laura, “you used to say the same thing about my old flip phone. I guarantee you it’d still be working if Mercy hadn’t chewed it up.”

“Yes… Mercy…” Danny said, under her breath.

Laura eyed Danny suspiciously before resuming her panicked fiddling, “this one will be fine. I just have to get something… anything, to open and we’re back in business.”

“Well, you may be right about that, but probably not before your call,” Danny said, gesturing to the clock, “so you should probably stop messing with that brick. You’ve got enough time still that you could probably pull the files you need from the cloud up in your office and then make the call from the landline.”

Laura made a face, “the landline, ugh. But, you’re right, fine.” Laura quickly turned towards her office, attention still on the smartphone in hopes of a last minute miracle.

She was nearly to her office when her foot encountered something fuzzy, and quite heavy, which let out a deep ‘chuff’ at having been kicked. Unable to stop her forward momentum, Laura started to tumble.

‘Ah, floorboards my old friend,’ was the only thought that passed through her head before her fall was arrested, halfway to the floor, by a large panther under her midsection. Thankful for her son’s quick reflexes, she slid off his back into a kneel beside him. Satisfied she was stable, he flopped over into a lounging position, regarding her.

“Phew. Thank you Drix, you saved me a broken nose. I’d feel pretty foolish doing a conference call while sounding like I had a cold,” she said, leaning over and touching her forehead to his. He chuffed again affectionately in response.

“But,” she added, “what have I said about napping in the hallway?”

Hendrix made a moan, looking emphatically at her phone.

Laura chuckled, “And that’s why we have the rule. For when your big dumb Mother—”

Drix growled and locked gazes with her. She smiled.

“For when your oft distracted mother—” Drix made another short moan and nodded firmly. “—wanders down the hall in a rush. Why don’t you go lay down in front of the fireplace? It’s probably a lot warmer there.”

Drix seemed to think on the proposal for a moment before making a short little yowl in agreement, making Laura smile. He got up and nuzzled her before wandering past to the living room. 

Laura got back to her feet and pocketed the phone. It would have to wait ‘til after her meeting. She walked into her office and was about to shut the door.

“Hey, look Hazel!” came Charlie’s voice from across the house, “a panther skin rug!”

“Ooh, how romantic,“ replied Hazel, equally lacking subtlety, “kiss me you fool!”

Laura sighed. After her call, she’d have to remain wary of obstacles on the hallway floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! This chapter was inspired by [this](http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/146596239848/jonathansnope-guloborealis-buyakasha) video I found on Tumblr. On that note, I have a Tumblr, cheezwhiz-cupcake, feel free to stop by or pop me a prompt.
> 
> -Juniper


	8. Dream Vacation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The family enjoys a beautiful island paradise.

“Holy Hufflepuff, this place is gorgeous!”

Laura wiggled her toes, digging down into the warm sand. This beach, stretched out along the edge of a beautiful sapphire lagoon, had been an incredible find. The waters, sheltered from the brunt of the ocean, gently lapped at the shoreline making a wonderfully safe place for the kids to paddle and play. The beach itself was only sparsely populated, with only four or five groups spread out over the few hundred yards of sand. Beyond the bounds of the beach, a lush green jungle stretched out in all directions.

Down in the shallows, the kids were happily screaming with Danny and LaF as they ran about splashing each other. Carmilla and Perry had both made themselves comfortable under the large umbrellas they’d packed along, Carmilla engrossed in some novel while Perry was dozing on a beach towel.

“That it is, and to think, we only had to travel to the other side of the planet to find it,” said Carmilla, not looking up from her book.

Laura turned around and narrowed her eyes at the vampire, “don’t act like you don’t like it here. You were the one who wanted to come all the way to Polynesia.”

“Oh, I never said I didn’t like it,” replied Carmilla, fixing Laura with a hungry gaze over her sunglasses, “but I have my stunning wife in front of me in a white sundress while my other stunning wife is dressed only in a blue bikini and is soaking wet. The local scenery pales somewhat.”

Laura flushed red before meeting Carmilla’s stare with a seductive smile of her own.

“Are you completely certain you’re a vampire?” said Perry with a wry tone to her voice, “are you, perhaps, some kind of supernatural rabbit? We’re in the middle of a beach, I should try to find a hose to turn on you two.”

“Well, you certainly make a good point,” said Carmilla, “kinda reminds me of last night when you left your girls with us to go on a moonlit stroll down the beach, well out of earshot… human earshot anyways.

Perry flushed deep crimson before laying her head back down, “I’m sorry, were you saying something? I obviously didn’t hear anything as I am completely and fully asleep.”

“Yeah, I thought that was the case,” Carmilla said, returning her attention to Laura who was trying to settle a glare at Carmilla, but couldn’t quite get the smile of amusement off of her face.

“What’s the case?” asked Danny as she came up, dripping with water, and began towelling off.

“That Perry is fast asleep and can’t hear how sexy my two wives are and what I want to do with them once we have some privacy,” Carmilla replied, watching Perry out of the corner of her eye for a reaction.

Perry grumbled softly, but otherwise remained still.

Danny chuckled. “Well, I suppose we can ask her and Laf to watch the kids tonight. Not for long, a couple hours maybe, enough for a nice… walk,” she added pointedly.

They couldn’t see her face, but Perry’s blush reached all the way to her shoulders and back as she caught the meaning. Desperate to change the topic, she rolled over onto her side. 

“So! This has certainly been a lovely, relaxing morning,” she said a bit frantically, “but did we maybe want to do something a bit more active after lunch? A hike or a trip into town, maybe?”

Carmilla made a face at both prospects but Danny perked up.

“There is a fantastic hike I’ve been wanting to try, just up that ridge to the top of the mountain,” Danny said, pointing up the green slopes behind them, “the trailhead is already up there so we’d drive most of the way up. The hike itself is only a couple miles round trip. Easily done in an afternoon. The best part is that at the top, you can look down into the volcano crater.

“Volcano?” asked Charlie as she ran up, “count me in.”

“Me too!” added Hazel, close behind. The remaining stragglers from water walked up at a more sedate pace a moment later.

“Well, I’d call the motion seconded,” said Danny satisfactorily, “all in favour of the volcano hike?”

A chorus of ‘ayes’ answered her.

“And opposed?” she asked, looking at Carmilla.

“Eh, could be worth a look.”

“Such enthusiasm,” Danny chuckled, “alright, let’s all pack up, get some lunch and then go see a volcano!”

x-x-x

The hike was going well, if a bit slowly for Danny’s tastes. The trail itself was well worn and marked so it was easy to follow and safe for the little ones. However, most of it went through rich and interesting rainforest, and the kids, and Lafontaine, wanted to stop and look at every little thing.

“Laf, come look at this bug!” cried Sky, mesmerized by a huge beetle whose shell shimmered iridescently between blue and green.

“Good eye Munchkin.” Lafontaine moved in close with their camera and snapped a pic of the insect.

“Hazel, Hazel! Look up there, in the trees,” Charlie called her friend over, pointing up into the canopy, “look at all those parrots.” The tree in question indeed held a small family of the colourful birds. Hazel didn’t say anything, but just looked up in adoration.

“Please Mama? These trees look like they’d be so much fun to climb,” Drix asked Carmilla.

“Sorry my boy, but your Mom is right. This is a public trail, you’d get seen and cause a panic,” Carmilla said, patting him on the back, “though I agree, yes, those trees look fun to climb. We’ll try to find a more secluded area to go for a run and maybe we can bounce around a bit.” Drix, happy with the suggestion, smiled and scampered up the trail a bit.

Danny smiled at the group and shook her head a little at their shenanigans. “C’mon all. We’re just a short ways from the top.”

Broken out of the spell, their group resumed an easy pace. It was only about fifteen more minutes before the foliage gave way to an amazing viewpoint. Down the side of the mountain, the view back down towards the lagoon and the arms of the island that wrapped around it was incredible. The group stood in awestruck silence, the only sound being the occasional click or beep as every camera they had took a snap of the view.

Turning around, they made their way over to the crater’s edge. Down below, the exposed lake of molten rock glowed gently against the daylight.

“Huh, that’s really kind of cool. I didn’t think lava just sat in volcanos like that outside of spy movies,” said Laura, “or would it be called magma if it’s still down there?”

“I dunno, but there’s an info board over here by the edge, maybe it can tell us,” said Danny, leading the way over, the rest of the family in tow. 

The sign, however, didn’t prove very useful.

“‘Finally, I have you. Mwa, ha, ha’,” Lafontaine recited aloud, “that seems kind of ominous. Wonder if someone was playing a prank, or maybe this was someone’s way to propose. like an inside joke. Or ooh, maybe—”

The next thing out of Laf’s mouth was cut off as the cliff edge under them gave way, sending them all plummeting to the fiery pool below.

Out of the underbrush, in a grey top hat and cape, twirling an oversized moustache and holding a shovel, was Dean Morgan. She cackled maniacally before covering her face with the cape and stalking back into the jungle.

x-x-x

Laura woke up in her bed, feeling confused and just the slightest bit annoyed. Sitting up, she looked at the clock to see it was still the middle of the night. Beside her, Carmilla stirred at the disturbance before sitting up herself.

“Hey, you okay?” she asked, rubbing Laura’s back.

“Yeah, just a really weird dream,” Laura replied, “probably just something I ate… did Mercy help you with dessert last night?”

Carmilla chuckled, “you really need to get over that. Anyone could have mixed up salt and sugar in the cookie recipe, they look the same.” 

Laura rolled her eyes at that but dropped it. “So, I’m thinking no on my South Pacific vacation idea. Maybe just Disney again this year?”

“Fantastic,” drawled Danny sleepily, “now could you two please quit yakking and go back to sleep.”

Laura grimaced sheepishly as she and Carmilla lay back down. Danny threw an arm over both of them, pulling them close, and the three drifted back into slumber.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration for this one came from a comment I left for Jess last year on the original story. The idea of the dean (or anyone really) dressed like an old cartoon villain, like Snidely Whiplash or Dan Backslide, amuses me to no end. 
> 
> I hope you guys liked it, even if I pulled the "it was all a dream" card.
> 
> -Juniper


	9. Going to the Dogs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla is concerned her son is becoming too much like the dogs in the family.

Danny knew Carmilla wasn’t going to be too happy when she got home, but Danny couldn’t find it in her yet to care. Drix was wiggling back and forth on the bed, his little furry butt high in the air, watching the small ball in Danny’s hand with rapt attention. Little Mercy had fallen asleep nearly an hour ago, but Drix was still going strong. 

“Ok, Drix, only a few more throws before we need to take a nap, ok?” Danny said and Drix, barely larger than a house cat yowled, causing Mercy to kick one of her legs out at him. Danny chuckled running a hand through the girl’s fur as she tossed the ball for Drix down the hall. The young panther jumped off the bed and chased after the ball. Danny shook her head, chuckling. When she looked back up from her book, however, she saw Carmilla standing there with Drix in her arms.

“Care to explain?” Carmilla asked and Danny couldn’t help but laugh harder. Drix was trying to wiggle his way out of his mother’s arms, the ball in his mouth. She set him down on the bed and he jumped into Danny’s lap, spitting the ball into her book. 

“He’s having fun?”

“I can see that,” Carmilla said as she crawled into the bed next to her wife. She chucked the ball back down the hall, hearing her son’s nails scraping against the hall flooring. Carmilla leaned into Danny kissing her. “I thought we weren’t going to treat him like a dog.”

“Well, Mercy was playing and he was upset that I wasn’t playing with him so…” Danny tried to explain and Carmilla laughed shaking her head, she kissed her again. 

“It’s ok, he’s got too much energy anyway.” Carmilla looked down at Mercy who was snoring, “unlike someone else I see.”

“She played for two hours, he’s on hour three.”

“That’s… wow…impressive.”

“Yeah, I told him it was nap time soon.”

“Perfect, that’ll give me time to show my appreciation for you being a great mother then.” Carmilla kissed Danny again as Drix jumped back on the bed, she groaned.

x-x-x

Carmilla knew she shouldn’t feel like her son should fit a certain mold, but he was a vampire after all and a panther on top of that. He should have a regal air about him she thought but she was being proved wrong a lot lately about that, and today was no different.

Zach was coming over for dinner and an evening run with Danny, the siblings trying to still make time for one another even now as adults. Carmilla walked in and gave the large wolf’s muzzle a pat as she made her way into the kitchen. 

“Sorry I’m late,” Carmilla said, kissing Laura. “Where are the kids?” she asked, mildly suspicious; the house was too quiet for them not to be getting into trouble. 

“Zach’s playing with them,” Laura said, watching Carmilla turn to look toward the living room where Zach was. The large wolf was giving her a dog grin and Carmilla knew he was up to something. Shifting, she walked over to him where the large wolf licked her right across her face, leaving her more annoyed as she pushed by him. 

That’s when she found Hendrix, basically being sat on by her brother in law as the kitten tried to capture the wolf’s fast moving, wagging, tail. Carmilla groaned as she laid down on the ground, her paws covering her muzzle. She looked over at Hendrix who had both paws in the air, trying to capture the tail as it passed, claws extended all the way, as he nipped in the air for the tail.

“He’s been playing like this all evening,” Danny said walking up to Carm and scratching behind her ear, “I even got some video.” Hendrix tried to wiggle out from under the large wolf when Carmilla had an idea. She jumped up and pushed her head into Zach’s side, able to force the wolf to move just enough so that Drix could wiggle out and jump on his tail. Drix growled out his victory as he attacked the base of Zach’s tail, latching onto it with all his might. Carmilla smirked as she stalked back out of the room, plucking a sleeping Mercy as she went. She carried the girl over to the large lazy boy chair in the corner and started grooming the girl’s fur, staring at Danny, knowing how much the woman hated their daughter getting bathed like a kitten, two could play this game.

x-x-x

Carmilla should’ve grown used to it by now, she should’ve known that neither of her wives listened to her when she said she didn’t want Drix being treated like another pack member. He was a panther, not a dog. There wasn’t a damn thing wrong with the wolves in her mind, but some things just weren't ingrained into panthers like they were the wolves, or so she thought. 

Mercy was next to Danny, the young wolf standing proud and tall by her mother. Carmilla padded up and gave the girl a quick lick behind her ear, which she barely could reach now, before sitting next to her. She looked out across the field to see what the two were watching. 

There, in the middle of the field, was Hendrix. He was running alongside Sky, trying to teach her how to keep her feet about her. Carmilla couldn’t help but smile. Her son was taking his time, making sure that every time the young wolf fell, that she understood it was ok. He’d help her up and they’d start again. 

She looked around the field and saw that most of the pack was there watching. It finally hit her, they might not be wolves but they were part of their pack, always had been so what if Drix picked up a few mannerisms of the wolves? He was practically raised by the pack anyway. She couldn’t be more proud of her son, her family, or her pack. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Hope you like this one, let us know and also feel free to drop us a prompt here! We're always taking them and any of them are welcome! (Plus it'll help us if we're honest!)


	10. Flour Defence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When it comes to Perry's baked goods, Hazel always has them in her sights. Can Perry come up with a way to hold back her clever eldest?

“Oh Hazel!”

Perry's sweet sing-song voice rang through the house. To anyone unfamiliar with the woman, her tone might seem cheerful and inviting but the other residents of this home knew better.

“Yes Mom?” asked Hazel, smiling nervously.

“What is this?” Perry gestured to a pan on the counter.

“An apple pie?” the eight-year-old said innocently.

Perry rolled her eyes, why did she think this was going to be straightforward? She looked at her daughter pointedly.

“The apple pie you baked this morning?”

“That it is, and what is wrong with the pie?”

“There's a big piece missing.”

“And why is there a piece missing?”

“Cause me and Sky ate it,” Hazel ducked her head in contrition, though Perry could see a ghost of a smile tugging at the corners of Hazel's mouth.

Perry pursed her lips and stared at Hazel for a moment. If anything, at least she'd raised an honest child. Frustrating, but honest.

“Mommy,” called Sky plaintively from the living room, “my head hurts.”

Perry looked between Hazel and the door to the living room, trying to decide between the sugar thief and the sugar crash.

With a huff, she grabbed a cloth from the cupboard, soaking it in cold water and wringing it out before heading towards the living room.

“We will talk about this later Hazel,” she said.

“Okay mom,” said Hazel, looking forlorn, right up until Perry left the room that is.

The moment her mother was gone, her face lit up and she spun on her toe to head back upstairs… walking right into her other parent.

“And where do you think you’re going?” asked Lafontaine, an amused half-smirk on their face.

“Umm… to think about what I’ve done?” replied Hazel, her smile having vanished.

“Well,” said Laf, “you’re half right. However, I think cleaning up the leaves in the yard seems like a fair exchange for pilfered pie.”

“With the leaf blower?” she asked hopefully.

“With the rake.”

“Um…“ Hazel stalled, trying to think of something, “I love you?”

“I love you too, now come on. I’ll get the rake out for you”

Hazel just pouted as she followed Laf into the backyard.

x-x-x

Perry joined Laf on the deck, handing them one of the drinks she was carrying as they watched Hazel move about the yard, pulling the fallen leaves into a pile.

“How’s the munchkin?” asked Laf.

“Oh, she’ll be fine. She’s laying down with a cold compress,” said Perry, “I suspect the headache isn’t quite as bad as she made it out to be. I think she was just trying to distract me from Hazel. I don’t know if I find their willingness to look out for each other frustrating or endearing.”

“The latter, totally the latter,” Laf said firmly, “it’s worth a little frustration dealing with the matched set right now when we know they will be there for each other through thick and thin forever.”

“I suppose that’s true,” Perry said, looking at Laf with a warm smile, “I also suppose the same goes for that cleverness of hers. I’m still not certain how she got at the pie to begin with. I locked it in the liquor cabinet and it’s still fine and locked up tight; just with the pie on the wrong side of the door.”

“This might have something to do with it,” Laf said, handing Perry a bobby-pin and a bent paper clip, “I found those on the counter.”

“You’re joking. Our eight-year-old knows lockpicking?” exclaimed Perry.

Lafontaine chuckled, “not quite yet, though probably just a matter of time. I checked the lock and it’s a cheap one. She could’ve ‘picked’ it with a sponge. I’ll upgrade the lock, though that’ll probably only keep her out for another year or two.”

“We could try getting her into another hobby to put her creativity to a different use. Do you think she’d like some lego?”

“Well, I’m not sure that’s the best idea unless you’d like to watch our daughter go after cookies using a pneumatic drill made entirely out of a lego fire station set. I mean I’d find that pretty cool, but it seems counter-productive to our ends. I’m honestly stumped what we should do, aside from getting across that stealing is wrong.”

“At least in that respect, I think we’re doing alright. She seems to only go after my baked goods and nothing else. She knows I enjoy making them, so they aren’t all that hard to replace. I frankly think she wants to get caught. Proves that she figured out the puzzle so we can make a better one.”

“Huh, when you put it that way, seems almost a shame to simply go with another lock. I’ll have to come up with something one of these days.”

Perry simply smiled and leaned into them. On the lawn, Hazel had finally gotten all the leaves together into a big pile… just in time for Charlie to run out of the trees and throw herself into the pile, scattering leaves everywhere. Hazel squawked indignantly before throwing the rake down and lunging for the other girl. Charlie danced out of reach with a grin on her face before turning tail and running back for her place, Hazel in hot pursuit.

Laf and Perry couldn’t help but laugh as the girls ran off. Giving their wife a kiss, Laf walked down to the lawn to fix the pile and start bagging the leaves.

x-x-x

“Well, one year, seven months,” said Perry, placing a container of sugar cookies on the table, “not too shabby for a twenty dollar lock.”

Laf looked at the seemingly full container, then back to Perry, “what’s wrong? These seem fine. Are there some missing?”

“These were snickerdoodles yesterday.”

Lafontaine guffawed before they could catch themself. Hiding their smirk behind a hand, they tried to keep their laughter in check as they turned back to Perry.

“Alright, let me get this straight.” They started counting off fingers. “She got into the cupboard, took the cookies, presumably ate them, bought…?”

Perry picked up a cookie and bit into it, chewing for a moment before nodding. “Yep, from the bakery.”

“Bought replacements, and put them back like nothing happened?”

“That seems to be the case.”

“Well, I'm not inclined to punish her. I'm more impressed than anything.”

“Admittedly, I feel the same,” Perry said with an amused smile, “she reminds me so much of you when she does that, so it's hard to get mad. Plus, she already spent her allowance money on this, which is really payment enough.”

“So, what do we do now? We really need to up the ante. Especially if she sets her sights on something you make for an occasion.”

“I'd been thinking on that and I found this online,” Perry said, pulling out her phone to show her spouse what she had in mind.

“Time locked kitchen container,” Laf recited, reading the screen, “not a bad idea Perr, but this thing is plastic. It wouldn't last five minutes under her attentions.”

“Oh, I do realize that,” Perry said, a wide grin on her face, “however, I think that you could probably come up with something a little… sturdier?”

Laf’s face lit up, eyes sparkling. “Perr, are you asking me to do what I think you're asking me to do?”

“Lafontaine,” Perry said, meeting their eyes with a smile, “light of my life, heart of my heart, would you create an impregnable pastry vault to keep out even the most tenacious of cookie thieves?”

“Yes, yes I will,” they declared enthusiastically, “but first there is something important that we must do. Where are the kids?”

“They’re over playing, Carmilla’s watching them,” Perry said, a bit confused.

“Perfect.” They took her hand and kissed her before leading her towards the stairs. “You can’t say wonderful things like that and not expect me to want to kiss every inch of you. Every. Last. Inch.”

Perry turned red before giggling and chasing Lafontaine up the stairs.

x-x-x

“Wow Perry, this upside-down cake you made is amazing,” Danny said around a mouthful.

“Why thank you,” Perry said proudly, “I made it last night so the top layer really had a chance to soak down.”

“Couldn’t help but notice the interesting cake box you’d been keeping it in,” Danny observed, “I wasn’t sure if you had dessert or nuclear codes to be honest.”

Perry chuckled. “The ‘Demon Child Safe’. Just a little something Laf whipped up to keep desserts secure.”

“I can’t help but notice that it’s a touch… scorched.”

Perry glanced over at the box, “yes, I suppose it is.”

“Might that be related to why your daughter seems to be lacking eyebrows?” Danny asked.

Perry chuckled. Hazel was perched on the couch in the living room alongside the rest of the kids. Above her eyes, a pair of hastily scribbled on eyebrows did little to conceal the fact that the genuine article was missing.

“It could very well be,” Perry said, “though she hasn’t said anything, so I can’t be completely certain.”

Danny just stared at her incredulously.

“It’s fine, really,” defended Perry, “I was kind of expecting this one day since she seems to be following in Laf’s footsteps. Lafontaine is actually so proud, they’re fit to burst. They were thirteen before they managed to blow their own eyebrows off so having their daughter beat their record by a full three years is the best thing ever for them. They fully intend to teach her how to redraw eyebrows once she asks for some advice.”

“Aww, that’s actually kind of sweet,” said Danny, “bizarre... but sweet. Though some lessons in first aid and fire safety may also be a good idea.”

“Oh don’t I know it. I’ve already got both of them signed up to join me for classes when I renew.”

Danny raised an eyebrow at her.

“Well, what did you expect?,” scoffed Perry, “When you fall for someone like Lafontaine, you very quickly learn the skills to keep them alive and healthy.”

Danny chuckled and raised her fork in salute. “Well, can’t say I can argue with that.”

“I think they’ll prove useful to her. I’ll probably only use this thing once in a while, when I absolutely need a dessert saved,” Perry mused, “but she is so much like her parent, I think she’s going to go through plenty more eyebrows in her life; pastry safe or no.”

“Hey Mom,” said Hazel, walking up, “can me and Charlie have another piece of cake?”

“I think we can allow that,” Perry said, getting a quick nod from Danny before getting up and leading her daughter to the kitchen counter.

“Uh… Mom,” started Hazel, sounding a little unsure, “I kinda heard you and Aunt Danny talking. You’re not mad that I tried to get the cake?”

“No, I’m not mad,” Perry said as she cut two more pieces, “though I am a little disappointed that you didn’t show a little more caution.” She ran a finger along Hazel’s brow.

Hazel winced, looking up at her mother’s finger. “Can Laf really show me how to make them look real?”

“At this point, they’ve done it so many times, they could do it blindfolded. They’ll show you the trick of it.”

The two shared a chuckle before Perry knelt down and grasped her daughter’s shoulders.

“As much as the eaten desserts may annoy me, I love you more than any cake or pie I could make. Never lose your tenacity or your creativity my dear, they are amazing parts of you.”

“I won’t Mom,” Hazel said, wrapping her arms around Perry’s neck, hugging her mother tight.

Letting go of Hazel, Perry stood back up and handed her the two plates to take back to the living room before setting about cleaning up the counter.

“Oh and Mom?”

Perry looked up to see her daughter looking back with a smirk.

“I’m totally gonna figure out a way into that thing. One day.”

Perry could help but return the smirk, raising an eyebrow in challenge.

“I’d expect nothing less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I seem to have an obsession with baked goods in these chapters, don't I? I came up with this as an origin for the box from "Tender Flaky Heist" from the original story. Hope you guys like it!
> 
> -Juniper


	11. Highbrow Discourse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minor hazards are part and parcel of Hazel's interest. When the occasional flare-up gets the better of her, she can always count on Charlie's help in saving face.

Charlie laughed after she opened the door to see Hazel standing there, her eyebrows singed off again. She took Hazel’s hand in hers and dragged her up the stairs to her bedroom. 

“Do I want to know this time?” she asked as she had Hazel sit down and she pulled her makeup out.

“I didn’t know those chemicals made fumes like that.”

“Oh god,” Charlie tilted Hazel’s head back, brushing her hair from her face as she looked at the woman’s eyes, checking to make sure they weren’t injured. 

“What did you mix?”

“I don’t know.”

“Did you do it in the fume hood?”

“Yes…?”

“Hazel?” Charlie raised an eyebrow and Hazel sighed.

“I put it in after… the lab is clear, I swear. I hit the evac button.”

“I’m thanking aunt Perry for that button.”

“Can we not tell my mom?”

“Because she’s not going to notice the missing eyebrow thing?”

“Fine…” Hazel huffed, laying down on the bed. Charlie rolled her eyes and crawled onto Hazel’s lap, eyebrow pencil at the ready.

“Ok, stay still.”

“Yes mom,” Hazel huffed as Charlie leaned forward. Carefully, she started drawing Hazel’s eyebrows back on. 

“You really need to be more careful.”

“I know,” Hazel said softly, “you know I love you, right?”

“Of course I know that.”

“Not just because you draw my eyebrows back on.”

“I know.”

“I just wanted to make sure you know.”

“I’ll never forget either.”

“Good.”

“Wait, why?”

“Because i might need some help cleaning the lab.”

“Oh Hazel,” Charlie laughed, dropping her forehead to Hazel’s shoulder. Hazel looked over and kissed Charlie’s cheek.

“You love me.”

“I do.”

x-x-x

Charlie sighed as Hazel attempted to draw her own eyebrows back on. It was that awkward time where the hairs were starting to grow through, but only in patches. She took the pencil from Hazel before tilting her head back so she could draw carefully. 

“Maybe we should just get these tattooed on you.”

“That’s an idea.”

“I’m joking.”

“I know,” Hazel smiled, circling her arms around Charlie, “but think of all the time we’d save.”

“Time better spent how?”

“I can think of a few things,” Hazel smirked as she kissed Charlie’s neck.

“Get your mind out of the gutter Haze,” Charlie warned, pushing Hazel’s head back forcefully.

“But babe.”

“I need to finish this.”

“I know, but it can wait till after we make out.”

“Yeah sure, but then someone will come home and then bam, you’ll have one eyebrow the rest the day,” Charlie explained, Hazel huffed and put her head back allowing Charlie to finish her work. 

“Can we make out after?”

“Yes.”

“For as long as possible?”

“Yes.”

“And fo—”

“Hazel, if you don’t stop I swear to god I’ll give you bushy eyebrows.”

“Right.” Hazel tried not to wiggle around as Charlie worked, she was bored however.

“Hazel…”

“I know.”

“I swear woman.” Charlie laughed she leaned down and kissed her. “You drive me nuts.”

“But you love me.”

“I do, for now.”

“Gasp! For now?”

“For now.”

“Ok…”

“I’ll love you forever dork.” Charlie leaned down kissing Hazel again. 

“Thank god, cause with our families, you never know how long we’re going to live.” Hazel smirked as Charlie laughed, cuddling into her lap. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jessi wrote this gem as a bit of a follow-up to the last chapter, inspired by poor Hazel blowing her eyebrows off. Enjoy! -Juniper


	12. Any Port in the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting caught out in the rain is never very fun.

Hendrix stirred in his sleep. Something had disturbed him, but not quite enough to wake him up. Before long there was another disturbance… then another… then another. Groggily, Drix started to wake up.

He raised his head, still a bit bleary-eyed as he oriented himself to his surroundings. Rubbing his eyes clear with a paw, he looked around, trying to remember where he was. A symphony of reds and golds surrounded him, enthralling him in his half awake state. It wasn't until he looked down and saw the thirty foot drop beneath him that he recalled his choice of napping location.

It has been a gorgeous autumn morning and the woods had just been calling him out for a run. There’d been no one else home to join him, but he wasn’t going to miss the opportunity. Pausing only to close the door, he’d catapulted himself off the deck, shifted in mid-air, and bolted into the treeline. 

The sun had been shining and the crisp fall air had felt exhilarating in his lungs. He’d ducked and weaved through the trees, pouncing skillfully off of trunks and relishing the feeling of crisp fallen leaves under his pads. It wasn’t until he’d made it all the way to the hospital before starting to head back towards home, aiming for the lake. It had still been early when he’d hit the water’s edge, so he’d decided to climb up a tree near the shore and fell asleep on a high branch where he could sun himself.

He wasn’t quite certain how long he’d been napping there, but his beautiful fall day was gone. The sun could no longer be seen and instead, a blanket of threatening grey clouds now covered the sky and the temperature had dropped, making him glad for his thick coat. 

But it confused him as well, while certainly not as pleasant a day as when it started, it wasn’t that much less conducive to a nap, and there was nothing within sight that could have woken him up.

The answer came and hit him right between the eyes, literally. A raindrop; fat, cold and, of course, wet; struck him on the face causing him to flinch. Looking up, it became clear that the thick canopy of leaves was protecting him from much of the rain. Now that he was aware, he could hear the soft patter of the rain around him. It was gentle at the moment, but getting harder with every passing minute.

He grumbled audibly, this was not how this day was supposed to go. Here he was, stuck high in the air and a long run from home. There was no way he was getting back resembling anything close to dry. Even shifting back wouldn’t help as he didn’t think to put on a jacket before leaping out the door.

Further annoyed by his lack of forethought, he began gingerly picking his way back down the tree trunk. This was the slowest and most awkward part of the process, and a big reason why he only climbed really high up when he was alone. It’s hard to maintain your cool panther vibe with your limbs splayed out against gravity, trying your best not to fall on your face.

He reached the base of the tree as the rain really started to come down; even the thickest parts of the woods would not provide him much cover. Since staying drier as he went wasn’t going to be an option, he decided his best bet was to find closer shelter. Remembering the route he took, he figured the closest place he could run to would be his grandparents’ house. Aiming in what seemed about the right direction, he took off in a full bound, being extra careful as to where he put his steps. Even with four feet, a layer of wet leaves could still leave him slipping into a nasty crash.

In the air, the smell of the pack was growing stronger, the scents of his Grandpa Paul and Grandma Sue in particular, so he knew he was getting close. Following his nose to get a stronger bearing, Drix soon broke out of the woods into his grandparents’ backyard. With a great feeling of relief, he bounded across the lawn and up to the sliding glass door. He reached his paw up to the handle to slide it open and found the door wouldn’t move.

He huffed in annoyance as he tried to pull at the handle again, but the door remained shut, probably locked. Extending his claws, he tapped on the glass and yowled softly, hoping someone would hear and let him in where it was dry. However, his efforts were for naught as no one seemed to be home. 

Feeling emotionally, and somewhat literally, put out, Drix prowled his way around the front of the house. Taking a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching, he moved up to the front door in hopes he could get in that way. He made several attempts at pawing the door handle open before he got frustrated and decided to just shift so he could get a grip.

He realized his mistake a split second too late and the moment he shifted, all of his nice dry clothes became soaked with the water that was still covering him. In a truly foul mood now, he took a firm hold of the door handle and tried to turn it; the door remained shut.

With a groan, he let his head fall forward to rest on the door and took a few deep breaths to calm down. This was no one’s fault but his own, there was no reason to pitch a fit. At this point, he just wanted to get home.

He turned around and sat down on the step, taking a momentary respite from the rain under the eave. The rain was a full on downpour now and the entire world just looked miserable. The temperature had also dropped further and Drix, in his wet clothes, found himself starting to shiver. Drix quickly shifted back, his wet fur marginally warmer than the soaked shirt and jeans he’d set out in.

He stalked back around to the back of the house, looking at it with a huff, before walking back into the woods. His pace was more sedate now; he was completely sodden and there was little difference whether he ran or walked home at this point. He didn't really care, he just felt like sulking.

His mood didn't hold for long though, as from somewhere ahead, a wolf howl echoed through the woods. It was unmistakably Mercy, howling clear as a bell. His sister was calling him home.

He paused to answer with a roar of his own before picking up the pace, making for the house. Before long, Mercy appeared out of the underbrush, bumping into his shoulder affectionately as they ran for home. Glad for the company, Hendrix redoubled his pace and before long, they had broken through to the backyard.

Mercy let out a sharp yip as they crossed the yard. Inside the house, someone stood up and started heading towards the garage, where Mercy led Drix, instead of heading straight up to the doorwall. When they rounded the side of the house, the door had already been raised and Charlie was waiting inside.

“C’mon you guys, it’s warmer in the mud room,” Charlie gestured past herself as she hit the button to close the door behind them.

Much to Drix’s relief, Charlie was right and the mudroom felt blessedly warm, even if he was still soaking wet. Exhausted, he lay down on some towels she’d laid out on the floor. 

“Jeez Drix, you look like a drowned rat,” Charlie exclaimed.

Drix huffed at being compared to a rat, though he couldn’t find much other reason to disagree. He was soaked to the skin. He’d taken swims in the past where he’d gotten less wet.

“Well serves you right for going out and playing in the rain without me,” Charlie joked, drawing an unimpressed stare from Drix.

He exchanged a knowing glance with Mercy who let her tongue loll out in a lupine smile, knowing exactly what he was suggesting. Slowly, Drix stood up, arching his back while Mercy planted her paws, adopting a similar posture.

“What are you guys… no, no! NO—”

Charlie let out a shriek of surprise and laughter as both Mercy and Drix shook themselves dry, soaking both Charlie and the mud room.

“Oh, you guys are so dead,” Charlie chuckled, wiping spray from her face, “but later, when you least expect it. Now, Drix, at least you’re not dripping anymore. Go take a hot shower, I left your robe and some fresh towels in the bathroom.”

Drix made a grateful murr and rubbed Charlie affectionately, leaving another wet streak on her hip, before padding off upstairs towards the bathroom.

“You on the other hand, didn’t get that wet,” he heard Charlie’s voice behind him, “so you’re dry enough now to shift and help me dry this place up.”

Mercy’s whine was the last thing he heard before kicking the bathroom door shut behind him.


	13. Alma Matters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow is Charlie's first day of University. Is she ready for this next step?

“You have everything you need for tomorrow?” Danny asked, walking up behind Charlie, who was checking over a list in front of her.

“I think so though it doesn’t feel like it,” said Charlie, scratching her head, “a couple notebooks, a few pens and pencils and my bookbag. After all the supplies I kept in my locker the past few years, this feels… odd.”

“I suppose it would,“ Danny mused, “but it’s only day one. You’ll eventually be hauling around textbooks, library books and other odds and ends. You just get it as you need it rather than getting everything all at once.”

“Well, that sounds more civilized, at least,” said Charlie, “what was your first day like?”

“Nothing like yours is going to be like, I’m fairly certain,” said Danny, “a new year at Silas is a… unique experience for first years. I doubt you’ll have to fight sentient trees to get your books back or duck the alchemy club conscription efforts. Not that those were all that threatening once you realized you could toss the latter to the former and solve both problems for an hour or so, however long it took them to get loose.”

“You almost make it sound like I should have applied to Silas.”

“No. Oh god no,” insisted Danny, “don’t get me wrong, Silas had its upsides. It was place where supernaturals could be open and relatively safe, and I never would have met your mothers if I hadn’t attended, or most of our social circle really. But, there is a… malevolence to that campus. The dean’s machinations aside, it was a place where odd injuries and disappearances would just occur, and people just accepted it for some reason. I don’t want that for you.”

“Glad I decided to stay nearby then,” Charlie said with a grin.

“You and me both,” agreed Danny.

“I suppose that’s what’s throwing me off,” Charlie supposed, “the cliche for going off to university is loading up all your stuff to move into dorms and here I am with a few pencils.”

“On the plus side, no shower sandals,” joked Danny.

“Eww, is that really a thing?”

“You know, I have no clue. Silas had private bathrooms for each dorm and same went for the Summers’ lodge.”

“Still making a pretty good case for Silas there, Mom.”

“I know, it’s kind of annoying actually. It’d be a great place if it wasn’t, y’know, evil.”

“Funny how a little detail like pure evil can just ruin a good thing.”

“What’s evil ruining now?” asked Carmilla, walking into the kitchen.

“Silas,” replied Danny, “it had all sorts of nice amenities, for a university campus.”

“Well, of course it did. It’s hard to draw in a pool of potential sacrifice victims if the environment doesn’t appeal,” drawled Carmilla, “but why are we talking about that hole in the ground? Tomorrow, you’re going to a proper university that won’t try to kill you with anything but boredom and I get to feel older than dirt.”

“You’ve lived over three and a half centuries and this is what makes you feel old?” asked Danny.

“That is barely aged for a vampire,” scoffed Carmilla, “but my first child going to university? That’s a mark of being old.”

Danny opened her mouth to argue, but couldn’t find it in her to disagree. “Dammit, you made me think about it, now I feel old.”

“Well, if you two old ladies can stop your wool-gathering for a short time,” Charlie joked, “maybe you can help me figure out anything I might be missing.”

“Bear spray?” suggested Laura, wandering in off the deck, “your grandpa Gus knows where to get it in bulk.”

“Seriously, did you all want me to apply to Silas?” asked Charlie.

“Silas, who said anything about Silas?” Laura rounded on her wives. “Did one of you say she should’ve gone to Silas?”

“Whoa, Laura, calm down,” said Danny, her hands up defensively, “no one’s saying she should go to Silas.”

“I’d make sure there was no Silas to go to, if anyone had,” grumbled Carmilla.

“We just noticed that none of us really have any good first day of university advice for her since she’s not going to have to deal with dimensional portals or roving packs of Satyrs, all of whom are named Fred.”

“How is Fred, by the way?” asked Laura.

“Pretty good according to his last letter,” said Danny, “he and his wife just had their thirty-sixth kid.”

“Wow, Satyrs. I’m not sure how they keep on going like that,” marvelled Carmilla, “wait a minute, yes I do. Same way we do, a youthful attitude and plenty of—”

“Ahem, daughter still in the room here!” exclaimed Charlie.

“Heh, sorry.”

“Now if you’re done trying to drive me off, any suggestions as to stuff I might need?”

“Calculator?” suggested Danny.

“No, I don’t have any science electives and my phone will work in a pinch.”

“Something to read in class,” said Carmilla.

“I think I’ll try getting bored first before I attempt advanced slacking off.”

“Suit yourself,” Carmilla added with a smile.

“Snacks, if you get hungry,” said Laura resolutely.

“Well, I was gonna meet Aaron for lunch, but I suppose a granola bar or two would be smart to have along.”

“A granola— over my dead body,” Laura exclaimed before stomping over to the cupboard, “no daughter of mine is enduring her first year without proper snacking fare.” From the cupboard, Laura produced a package of her favourite cookies before marching over to Charlie’s bookbag and shoving it in with a determination that brooked no argument.

After a few more rounds, they were satisfied that Charlie was ready to go.

“You sure you don’t want your laptop,” asked Laura.

“For now, I think I’ll try things the old fashioned way,” said Charlie, “I can take my computer another day if I decide it’ll be easier later.”

“Well, then I’d say you have everything,” said Laura, sighing, “it feels like only yesterday you were starting kindergarten. I’m so proud of you, but part of me wishes you didn’t have to grow up.”

“Same here,” said Danny.

“Ditto again,” agreed Carmilla, “you're too old, I'm too old, everyone is just too old, too fast.”

“Well, how about a childish night to help alleviate that?” suggested Charlie, “pizza and board games? It seems like forever since we did that.”

“Y’know, I think you may be onto something,” said Carmilla, “go find your brother and sister, I’ll order pizza.”

“I think I’ll toss on a Disney movie,” Laura said, “if we’re going to do this, might as well do it right.”

“That sounds great,” said Charlie, “this is going to be a fun night.” Charlie turned to find her siblings. Tomorrow, she was taking a big step forward, but for tonight at least, she could still be a kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, I thought a back to school chapter seemed fitting for today. I hope those of you who made the plunge back into your studies had a smooth start to the year. 
> 
> -Juniper


	14. Repast and Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ruth drops by the Hollis house for advice of one kind or another.

Laura was lounging on the couch, enjoying a book, when her train of thought was interrupted by a cushion flying into her lap. She looked up, with an inquisitive smirk, at Carmilla who was leaning over the armrest, smiling at her.

“Yes?”

“We're gonna head out for a run.”

Laura looked past Carmilla to where Danny stood at the doorwall, very obviously itching to get moving. “Sounds good, just you two or are you taking the kids?”

“Hendrix and Mercy are outside already,” said Danny, “and I think Charlie is upstairs studying.”

“Alright, have fun.” Laura stretched and sat up, marking her place in the book. ”I think I might get dinner started while you're out. I found a recipe I want to try”

“Ooh, whatcha making?” asked Carmilla.

“Garlic Stew”

Carmilla made a face while Danny barked with laughter.

“Cupcake—”

“I'm kidding! Give me a little credit, jeez. I want it to be a surprise.”

“Just in case you screw up and have to make something different?” Danny said jovially.

Laura glared at her wife for a moment. “Yes… but you're not supposed to call me out on it. I think it's part of our vows. For richer or poorer; in sickness and in health; letting your wife save face whenever possible; for as long as we all shall live.”

“Sure yeah, something like that.” Danny smirked.

Carmilla smiled and shook her head a little at them. “Ok, we’ll be back in a couple hours. Have fun with your little experiment.” She walked over and kissed Laura on the head before walking back to where Danny was waiting and the two of them headed out the door.

Laura got up and walked into the kitchen, pulling up the recipe she wanted to try on her phone, a tasty looking Chicken Parmesan. Reading over it carefully, she began to pull out ingredients and equipment when she tugged too hard on a frying pan, bringing the rest of the cupboard out with it. Pots and pans spilled out onto the floor with a terrible clatter.

Laura’s face scrunched up in annoyance at the mess. It was a minor inconvenience at worst, but hardly a good omen for her little culinary venture.

“What on earth was that?” Charlie asked, running down the stairs, “are you okay?”

Laura smiled at her daughter. “I’m fine. Nothing hurt but my pride.”

“What are you trying to do?”

“Make us dinner,” said Laura, bending down to pick up the frying pan she’d been after, “I’m trying a new recipe and I guess all the pans wanted to help.”

“Well, no slight to our cookware,” said Charlie, kneeling down to help her mother, “but I think I’d make a much better assistant. What are we making?”

“We are attempting to make Chicken Parmesan,” Laura said, with a grateful smile, “or if that fails, probably a simple chicken alfredo.”

“Is that why you bought enough chicken to feed the entire pack?”

“...maybe.”

“Well, we’ll just have to save it for a barbeque. We are going to nail this recipe without a single complication.”

x-x-x

Ruth wandered up the drive to Carmilla’s house. She was normally loathe to visit while Danny was likely to be there, but she needed advice and the big mutt would probably be helpful, if she didn’t stake her first.

She was approaching the front door when she smelled smoke. Acrid and unpleasant, and definitely coming from the house. The world turned into a blur as she sped through the front door, moving towards the source of the smoke. Her nose led her to the kitchen where she found Laura glaring at a covered pan on the stove while Charlie was up on a chair, trying to silence the smoke alarm as it blared piercingly. 

Seeing there was currently no danger to the family, Ruth composed herself, settling her customary smirk onto her face. “Well now, what’s going on here?” she purred. Unfortunately, as neither Hollis had yet seen her, her quip went unnoticed; drowned out by the smoke alarm.

She pouted slightly at the lost opportunity, waste of a good entrance. With an eyeroll, she made her way over to the doorwall, opening the panes one by one to let the fresh air in. 

Laura turned at the draft, noticing Ruth for the first time. She tilted her head in inquiry, making Ruth chuckle; silly human had been living amongst dogs for too long. Ruth tapped her nose in explanation, which Laura seemed to accept.

A couple seconds later, Charlie finally got the smoke alarm to turn off. Silence filled the room as the three sighed in relief at the lack of the abhorrent noise.

“I swear, who had the bright idea of installing integrated smoke alarms?” griped Charlie, “sure they’re safer and easier to maintain, but being able to extract the battery and chuck it across the room when it won’t shut up is an important feature.”

“That would be your mama. You can take it up with her,” chuckled Laura, “thank you for opening those up, Ruth. So, what brings you by?”

“I was just coming by to talk to Carmilla; I need some advice,” said Ruth.

“Well, the bad news for you is she’s out for a run,” said Laura.

“However,” chimed in Charlie, “Mom’s with her, so you don’t have to worry about getting along with her.”

“Odd as it sounds, I kind of need to see her as well,” said Ruth, somewhat chagrined.

Laura raised her eyebrow, “Really? Well... okay!” She shrugged good naturedly and turned back to the stove. “You’re welcome to stay for dinner. We’re having Italian… I hope.”

Ruth perked up. “Italian? Sans garlic, I assume.”

“Of course. I’m loading it with basil instead,” said Laura, gesturing to a small sheaf of green leaves on the counter.

“The garlic’s for flinging at Drix when he gets annoying,” joked Charlie, “the cloves leave the funniest little welts.”

“That better be a joke young lady,” warned Laura.

“It is! Of course it is. I don’t throw cloves of garlic at Drix.” Charlie held up her hands defensively. “Anymore…” she added.

Ruth smirked at the girl, “Carmilla and I used to do the same thing to each other when Maman wasn’t looking. Mind you, we used entire bulbs. Even with gloves on, we couldn’t stand holding the stuff long enough to get the individual cloves loose,” Ruth chuckled, “it all ended one winter night in the 1790’s when I hit Maman in the forehead.”

Laura burst out laughing. “Oh wow, I wish I could have seen that.”

“Well, I wish I hadn’t,” Ruth said with a grimace, “Maman broke my arms and tossed me out into the snow for a week. We were at a mansion in the middle of nowhere with nothing else nearby, so I just had to sit out in the cold and wait. Needless to say, that was the last of that little game.”

“Well, I may not be quite that drastic,” said Laura, turning an eye towards Charlie, “but such actions could end in being grounded from using the family cars. Do I make myself clear?”

“Crystal. Seriously, the last time I did that, I was thirteen,” Charlie assured, her tone serious, “I know better now. I’m afraid to think of what may have happened if I’d gotten a clove in his mouth.”

“You and me both,” Laura agreed.

“Well, since the risk of a pungent death seems to be minimal, you mind if I watch what you're doing?” asked Ruth.

“Still trying to make up for lost time on the Italian food,” Charlie asked with a smile.

“Am I that transparent?” Ruth asked, to which Charlie responded with a nod, “I try recipes myself, but they end up bland without the garlic. You guys seem to have the knack of it.”

“Well, you're welcome to hover, but this is a new recipe. As you can already probably tell, we're having issues with it.” Laura grabbed the pan and took it to the sink to start over. “Though, we've only lost some butter. I think this recipe made a mistake, butter smokes too much—”

“It should really cut back,” chortled Charlie.

“Quiet you,” Laura chuckled, “grab the vegetable oil and we'll add some more cheese to make up for the flavour.”

Charlie tossed a quick salute and ran to the pantry.

“Ruth, you wanna to give us a hand?” asked Laura.

“Sure, why not. What can I do?”

x-x-x

The rest of the family returned to a sweet, savoury aroma wafting across the yard.

“See, I told you we didn't need to come back early,” said Carmilla, shifting back, “she probably just scorched something.”

“Of course, you were right,” admitted Danny, “it's my other wife that occasionally sets the kitchen on fire.”

“Hey, don't say that like I can't cook or something,” Carmilla protested, “those newspapers were asking for it and I always safely put them into a bin before ignition.”

“My sincerest apologies,” said Danny as she wrapped an arm around Carmilla and the two of them shared a chuckle.

Walking into the house, they found Laura and Ruth standing at the stove while Charlie set the table. Laura was gesturing at the pot she was stirring, apparently explaining something to Ruth.

“—and if you wait until the last moment to put the rest of the basil in, the flavour should be nice and strong,” Laura said, Ruth nodding in understanding, before noticing her wives and giving them a smile, “welcome back, how was your run?”

“It was fine… everything okay here? “ Danny asked, eyeing Ruth warily.

“Nice to see you too, Fido,” snarked Ruth, drawing a scowl from Danny.

“Everything is fine,” Laura interjected, giving each of them a warning glance, “dinner will be ready in a few minutes, we're just waiting on the pasta. Ruth, now would probably be a good time.“

“Oh right, yeah. I kinda need to talk to you… both of you,” she said to their surprise.

Carmilla nodded, leading them into the living room. “Alright, what's up, Stripes?”

“Well, I kinda need some advice… about courting someone…  who's a werewolf… “ said Ruth, gradually losing her nerve.

“What?!” exclaimed Danny, “where did you meet a— no. No, no, no. Who?”

“Umm… Scout.”

“Sco—?!” Danny started to yell before pausing and looking thoughtful for a moment, “you know what, that's just fine.”

“Wait, really?” asked Ruth, somewhat perplexed.

“Yep. Scout isn't some barely grown pup. She's more than capable of handling herself,“ said Danny, “don't get me wrong, You hurt her and nothing will be able to hide you from me, but odds are she'd deal with you before we needed to. So, have at ‘er.”

“Okay, thanks… I think,” said Ruth warily before turning to Carmilla “so, any advice you can give me?”

“Uh… make sure to walk her every day?” she suggested, earning a light smack on the arm from Danny, “honestly, there's no special advice I can give you about dating a werewolf. When it comes to matters of the heart, they're the same as you or me.” Carmilla paused to gather her thoughts. “All I can really say is, let her in. Before I stopped lashing out to keep people away, Dan’ and I could barely stand each other, but the moment I let my guard down she, and the whole pack really, just naturally came in.” Danny smiled at her, pulling her close.

“Wow… that's so… cheesy,” said Ruth.

“You wanted advice, that's my advice. Take it or leave it.”

Ruth pouted. “Fine, I'll think about it.”

“Good, cause it's good advice,” said Laura from the doorway.

“Were you eavesdropping?” asked Danny.

“Eavesdropping implies I was trying to hide. I was standing here, unnoticed, almost the entire time,” said Laura, “so, I was just being nosy. Anyways, Dinner is ready whenever you are.”

“Was that it, Ruth?” asked Carmilla.

“That's it, and y'know, I think I learned something from this.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah…” replied Ruth, a mischievous smile forming, “I learned that butter really isn't all that good for frying chicken.”

The trio shared a groan as they all hopped up and headed for the kitchen table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everybody! Decided I needed to expand on Ruth's 'never had pizza before' education. Not quite sure why I went with chicken parmesan rather than something like lasagna (which had been my original plan), maybe I had a craving. I certainly was wanting some after I was finished.
> 
> Hope you all like it!  
> -Juniper


	15. Dispensing Wisdom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting her wisdom teeth out can be quite a trying experience for Sky, but a rather amusing one for everyone else

“What do you mean ‘they have to come out’?”

Sky looked at Dr. Ellis with no small amount of worry. She'd never had anything but a perfect record when it came to the dentist and with a mother who could crank out sweets faster than a keebler elf, that was saying something.

“Nothing to be concerned about,” the woman reassured her, pulling up the x-ray they'd taken earlier on her computer, “it's incredibly common. Your wisdom teeth don't have enough room and so are coming in at an odd angle.”

True to her assessment, the offending teeth were plain as day on the screen. They were nowhere near fully grown but even a layman could see they were not aligned with the rest of the teeth, one was so badly turned it was going to essentially ram her molars.

“If we don't get them out,” she continued, “you are in for a world of hurt.”

Sky frowned at that. She didn't like the idea of having teeth pulled, but she liked the alternative even less.

“Alright so, like, right now?” Sky asked, steeling her nerves.

“No,” the dentist replied with a reassuring smile, “we'll set up an appointment with our oral surgeon in a few weeks. You'll need someone here to drive you home and you'll want to take a couple days off to recover with plenty of soft things ready to eat.”

“Like bread kinda soft?”

“More like soup and ice cream.”

Sky perked up at that, “I think I can suffer through, for the sake of my health.”

“Most people can, funny how that works,” she countered with a chuckle, “talk to the receptionist on your way out and we'll see you back in a few weeks.”

Sky hopped out of the chair and out the door, feeling very positive about the upcoming procedure.

x-x-x

“Sky, would you stop pacing and just sit down?” said Mercy.

“I’m just so nervous,” said Sky, a slight shrillness seeping into her voice, “I mean I’m having surgery tomorrow. I’ve never had surgery before. I mean, yeah, it’s just really fancy teeth pulling, but still they’re gonna knock me out and I won’t know what’s going on and—”

Sky’s rambling cut short as Mercy managed to grab her hand and yank her down onto the couch. Before she was fully aware of what was happening, she found herself wrapped in all of Mercy’s limbs as her girlfriend latched onto her from behind like a limpet, making escape all but impossible.

“Calm down, Love,” Mercy said softly, kissing Sky just below her ear, “it’ll be alright. They do this all the time and you’re getting a guy who specializes in it.”

“I know that. It’s all nicely neat and logical in my head, my stomach is just too busy tying itself into knots to get the message.”

“Well, look at it this way,” offered Mercy, “yours is guaranteed to be a lot easier than mine. Dr. Antos did the procedure, but they had to put me fully under anesthesia, rather than the nice gentle sedation you'll get.”

“Why? Was there some special werewolf thing that made the procedure more serious?”

“You could say that,” chuckled Mercy, “think about it. You’re still partially awake when you’re sedated, albeit unaware. Now imagine that state of mind with someone who can turn into a large, biting wolf.”

“Alright, good point. Same case for Drix too?”

“No,” groused Mercy, “lucky bugger had enough room for them to grow in, even with the freakin’ fangs.”

“Wow yeah, I’m totally jealous.”

“You and me both,” agreed Mercy, “any pearls of wisdom from Haze’ or Charlie?”

“Charlie said it’ll be easy. In, out and a few days to recover,” said Sky, “Hazel, on the other hand, tried to convince me they’d use a hammer and chisel.”

“Seriously?” Mercy was highly unimpressed with her girlfriend’s sister.

“Seriously,” Sky affirmed, “in completely unrelated news, her duvet got mysteriously filled with pinecones, it’s the darnest thing.”

“Y’know, pinecones are like that. They find a habitat they like and then, woosh, instant infestation. Such tricky critters.” 

The two girls burst out laughing at the image before settling themselves a little more comfortably on the couch.

“Feeling better?” asked Mercy.

“A bit,” replied Sky, “I mean, I’m still nervous about it, but I think I can handle it. I’m still not looking forward to recovering. Days of a sore face and looking like a chipmunk.”

“So what you’re saying,” started Mercy, a sly smirk growing on her face, “is that we really need to make use of the time we have while you’re mouth is still working at it’s fullest.” Gently lifting Sky’s chin, Mercy drew her closer until their faces were only a finger’s breadth apart.

“Yes, exactly,” said Sky, closing the distance and driving her girlfriend back into the couch cushions.

x-x-x

“Sky? We’re ready for you.”

Sky looked up from her book at the nurse’s voice, giving him a smile and nod. She closed the book and handed it to her mother.  

“Good luck Sweetie,” said Perry.

“Thanks Mom.” Sky stood and made to follow the nurse when a handed entwined itself with hers. She looked warmly at Mercy, who gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

“See you when you wake up.”

“Looking forward to it.”

Mercy let her hand go and she followed the nurse down the hall. The room he led her to seemed like an ordinary dentist’s office, just with a few extra pieces of equipment and a nicer chair. She settled into the chair, already finding the experience a bit more pleasant than a usual dentist visit, while the nurse placed a monitor onto her finger.

“I have one like it at home for watching football.” Sky looked over at a smiling man sitting down beside her. “Beats a recliner anyday.”

“Is that why there’s only the one here?” she asked with a grin.

The man pantomimed a brief panic, making a show of shushing her before smiling again. “I’m Dr. Herdman. I’ll be taking care of you today. While my assistants grab the last items we need, did you have any questions?”

“Just about how long recovery is gonna take.”

“Fair enough. You'll be swollen and in some pain for a few days. We'll prescribe you some painkillers for that, but you'll be off solid food until the pain subsides,” he explained, “but, the teeth haven't taken root and I like to think that I'm pretty damn good, if you'll forgive my vanity, so you should heal up sooner, rather than later.”

“Well, that's good to know,” she said, tension draining somewhat, “and you're forgiven. I'll take ‘damn, I'm good’ over ‘first time I've done this, what's that?’ any day.”

The surgeon chuckled. “I'm glad you feel that way. Now, if you're ready, my colleague, Dr. Neid—” he gestured to a woman who'd joined them, “—will administer the sedative and we'll get started.”

“Now, you're going to feel a small pinch,” she said before injecting a small syringe into the back of Sky's hand. 

Wincing slightly, Sky watched with fascination as the drug disappeared into her vein.

“Alright,” said Dr. Herdman, “I'll get you to start counting backwards from one hundred.”

“Ok,” said Sky, laying her head back, “one hundred, ninety-nine, ninety-eight, ninety-seven… ninety-six… ninety-five… 

 

“Ninety… four… “

x-x-x

It was barely a half-hour later when the nurse returned to the waiting room and walked up to Mercy and Perry.

“Well, we're all done. The sedation is just wearing off and we'll have her out in a couple minutes.”

“That certainly was quick,” commented Perry, looking mildly impressed.

“This is fairly routine for all of us, so we get it done pretty smoothly,” he said with a shrug, “our record stands at fifteen minutes, but that guy only had three teeth to extract, so it was kinda cheating.”

“No kidding, I want a redo!” joked Mercy.

“Somehow, I think the patient would protest somewhat,” he chuckled before handing them some sheets of paper, “here are some care instructions which you can go over with her once she’s a little more coherent and a prescription for some painkillers for once the freezing wears off. It mostly just boils down to rest and be careful. Right now, just make sure the gauze in her mouth stays there for at least an hour to stem the bleeding.”

“Seems simple enough,” mused Mercy, reading the instructions over Perry’s shoulder while he walked back down the hall. 

A minute later, he returned, guiding a somewhat bewildered Sky who seemed lost until her eyes fell on Mercy and she surged forward.

“There’s my puppy!” exclaimed Sky, her words muffled by the gauze. She wrapped Mercy in a hug before reaching up and stroking her head affectionately, “that’s my good wolf puppy.”

“That’s not a puppy, Sky,” said Perry, trying to hide her rising panic, “that’s Mercy, your girlfriend.”

Sky looked at Perry and narrowed her eyes, the effect somewhat lessened by her bulging cheeks, “I know it’s Mercy. She’s my great, wonderful, beautiful, wolf puppy girlfriend.”

The nurse chuckled. “She’ll be like this for a little while until the effects of the sedation wear off. If you have a phone handy to record her, you can get some pretty adorable memories. My favourite was a guy a few years back who decided he was a heroic knight and tried to lift and carry his boyfriend out of here. Luckily, his boyfriend was built like a truck and managed to catch him in a bearhug before he hurt himself.”

“Well, that's good,” said Mercy, trying unsuccessfully to discourage Sky's petting, “I guess your job is a little more exciting than meets the eye.”

“A little I suppose. I really just like being able to keep a watchful eye out,” he replied as he met Mercy's gaze, giving her a sly wink.

Mercy smiled at him, suppressing a laugh. “Yes, I suppose that would be quite satisfying,” she said before extracting herself from Sky's arms, “well, I suppose we'd best get this one home before she decides I need a collar.”

“Nooo,” said Sky, “you don't wear a collar, you run free. You and the pack through the woods. I want to go too.”

“We'll find a way darling,” said Perry, “now come on, let's get you home so you can rest.”

x-x-x

It took several minutes to coax Sky out to the car. Once she'd realized they were leaving, she'd wanted to thank and say goodbye to everyone in the office.

Mercy opted to sit in the back seat with Sky so she could keep an eye on her while Perry drove them home. Following the nurse’s advice, they set Perry's phone recording on the dash. No sooner had they pulled away when Sky sighed sadly.

“They were so nice to me,” she said, plaintively.

“They were?” asked Mercy.

“Yeah, they were nice to me and now I can’t see them.” Mercy’s heart melted at the forlorn expression on Sky’s face.

“We can go visit them sometime, if you like,” offered Perry.

“We can?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, cause they were so nice to me.” Sky seemed to be satisfied with that and they continued in silence as she experimentally prodded the frozen part of her face. She paused, however, mid-poke, seeming to realize something. “No… oh no…”

“What?” asked Mercy.

“I can’t smile,” she wailed, “I can’t smile anymore.”

“Oh baby, you’ll be able to smile again,” reassured Mercy, “you just need to heal.”

Sky didn’t really seem to acknowledge her. “If I can’t smile, how will people know when they make me happy? You make me happy,” she said, looking at Mercy, “I want to smile for you.”

Mercy pulled her close, resting her head on Sky’s shoulder. “You’ll be able to, once the gauze is out.”

“I will?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay,” Sky said, resting her head on Mercy’s and dreamily staring off into space.

They got about halfway home when Mercy noticed Sky reaching into her mouth. Gently, she reached up and pulled Sky’s arm back down. “Sorry Sky, you have to leave the cotton alone.”

“I don’t like it,” said Sky, pouting.

Mercy had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. Sky, pouting with her stuffed cheeks, had never before looked more like a chipmunk than she did right now.

“I can’t close my mouth,” Sky continued. She experimentally opened and closed her lips before making another attempt at removing the gauze.

“I know you don’t like it,” said Mercy, pushing her arms back down, “but it has to stay in there for you to heal.”

“I want to close my mouth,” groused Sky before changing tactics, “I’ll hold it.” She clamped both of her hands over her mouth. Mercy looked slightly agog at this new approach, but left Sky to her devices since she was leaving the gauze alone.

“Does that help?” asked Perry from the front seat. Mercy could tell she was trying very hard not to laugh.

“Mmhmm,” said Sky, through her hands.

Mercy watched her girlfriend for a moment until it became clear her hands were going to remain in place. With a chuckle, she snuggled back into Sky’s side for the remainder of the ride.

x-x-x

Sky had returned to her senses shortly after arriving back home. Satisfied that the bleeding had ebbed, they’d let her remove the gauze before Perry went to go put together a late lunch for all of them. She settled in on the couch and had been watching TV to distract herself as the freezing wore off when Mercy walked in with a tray.

“Here you go!” announced Mercy, “Homemade tomato soup and a chocolate milkshake, courtesy of your wonderful mother.”

“Thanks Merc,” said Sky gratefully before yelling to the other room, “Thank you!

“You’re welcome!” Perry called back.

Sky ate a spoonful, wincing slightly. “Ngg, without the freezing even opening my mouth for soup hurts a bit.”

“I know babe,” commiserated Mercy, “I remember that bit well. Don’t worry, Charlie and Hazel will be back from the pharmacy soon and you can take something for it.

Sky smiled slightly and slurped another spoonful, finding it less painful than putting the spoon in her mouth. “I hope I wasn’t too much trouble on the way home,” she said, taking a sip of her milkshake, “stupid no straws rule, this is gonna take forever to drink.”

“Rules are rules, you don’t want a dry socket,” Mercy chuckled, “and no, you were barely any trouble at all. Well, except for outing the pack.”

“What?!” Sky cried, a look of worry on her face.

“Don’t worry,” Mercy comforted, “only a nurse heard you and I’m fairly certain he isn’t gonna be a problem.”

“Jeez Merc, don’t scare me like that.”

“Ok, I’m sorry. You were just too cute.”

“Wow, I just don’t remember any of it. I hope you at least got some of it on video.”

“Your mom did, we’ll watch it later, if you want.”

“Oh good, I love post-wisdom teeth videos.

“Even of yourself?”

“Seems hippocritical not to.”

“I hope you can remember that while we watch it,” interrupted Hazel, coming into the room with a small bag, Charlie close behind “so, how’s our were-groundhog holding up?”

“You know, I’ve got plenty of pinecones left.”

“Is that any way to talk to your loving sister who just made the long arduous journey to get you some painkillers?” said Hazel dramatically.

“Oh come off of it,” said Charlie, mussing Hazel’s hair, “how you feeling kiddo?”

“It hurts but otherwise I’m fine. Feeling a bit sleepy though.”

Hazel sat down beside her sister, “that’s to be expected, your body wants to rest and heal. I think I slept most of the day away after mine. You feeling up to finishing your lunch, first?”

“Yeah, I’ll finish here and then go take a nap.”

“Pity, that milkshake looks really good,” Hazel joked, gently headbutting Sky affectionately. Sky smiled and continued to eat her lunch.

After she’d finished, Hazel’s shooed her off, saying she’d clean up. Stopping at the bathroom to take one of the pills, she entered her bedroom to find Mercy waiting on the edge of the bed. Without a word spoken, they laid down, Mercy holding Sky close.

“Thanks for coming with me today,” said Sky quietly, “it really helped.”

“Of course,” said Mercy, “I’m here whenever you need me.”

“I love you.”

“Love you too, now rest.”

Mercy pulled the covers a little tighter around them and the two drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You get me for an update today! Juniper wrote this I am avoiding homework so I'm posting it! We hope you enjoy this one as much as we did and god did I enjoy this one! :) Let us know!
> 
> Note from Juniper: This chapter was inspired by a video from Amymarie Gaertner, Jessi's inspiration for how Sky looks https://youtu.be/aeUJCD20RuI


	16. Whistle If You Need Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Summers have many tricks for calling for help in a crisis. One of these methods may net more help than intended

“Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?” asked Laf, looking up from their eldritch microbiology notes to where Danny was sitting across from them.

“Shhh!” she hushed them harshly before closing her eyes and listening intently.

Lafontaine strained to hear something, but could only hear the normal sounds of an afternoon at the library. The scratching of pens and pencils, the rustling of pages turning, the soft growls from the lit stacks whenever a first year got too close without offering treats. 

Danny, on the other hand, was focusing on something. Her brow furrowed and the corners of her mouth were turned down in a frown that intensified with every passing moment. Before long, she’d grabbed her bag and began throwing books and notes into it. Lafontaine boggled at Danny but quickly packed their things up as well before following her out of the building as she marched off without a backward glance.

Moving very quickly across campus, they quickly found themselves at the steps of the Summers' lodge. On the balcony above, Elsie was enthusiastically blowing on a small pipe, her eyes squeezed tight as she blew as hard as she could. However, much to Laf’s confusion, it seemed to be producing no sound, at least no sound that they could hear. Danny, on the other hand, had covered her ears as she’d gotten close to the lodge, wincing at whatever noise Laf wasn’t hearing.

“Elsie!” Danny yelled over the silent din, quickly grabbing the blonde’s attention, who immediately put the pipe down. Danny’s posture relaxed in relief, “hey, what’s up? why are you sounding the alarm?

“Mel and I found a dead dryad while we were on patrol,” she replied, gesturing to the woods, “it looked like maybe a warlock or something attacked it, so we came back to rally the lodge. Whatever members of the pack were here went off to try and track down the culprit while Mel took an armed group of hunters to the dryads’ grove to protect the rest of the convent. I stayed behind to try and call the rest of the pack back in and a couple of girls are inside trying to reach the remaining hunters by phone.”

“Nicely done, Els,” said Danny, “how many so far?”

“About half the remaining pack and a handful of hunters.”

“Okay, keep on calling for about ten more minutes,” Danny instructed, “I don’t want leave the rest of the girls too long without support.”

“Got it boss!,” said Elsie, returning the pipe to her lips.

Danny cringed before leading Laf into the lodge itself, shutting the door behind her resolutely. “Man, Elsie has the pipes to play that thing, but she has no clue how badly out of tune it is.”

“What is it?” asked Laf, “I couldn’t hear it. Is it some sort of dog whistle?”

Danny glared at them slightly. “It’s not a dog whistle. Well, we don’t like to think of it as one anyways. It plays three tones in the same register, but it’s a lot more powerful. It lets human Summers, like Elsie, call the pack in when we’re needed quickly.”

“That's pretty clever, could I have a look at that thing once this is all wrapped up?” asked Laf, their eyes sparkling with curiosity.

“Umm…” Danny hesitated, “we'll talk about it, later… maybe. For now I've got to talk to the others and coordina—”

The front door flew open revealing a pissed off Carmilla tailed closely by a very concerned Laura.

“Hey Babe, great to see ya, how was studying, be right with you, just gotta murder that blonde pied piper wannabe upstairs,” Carmilla rapid fired as she tried to push her way past Danny to the stairs.

Danny, preferring her sisters uneviscerated, quickly wrapped Carmilla up into a hug and cuddled her close. Thankfully, Laura followed her lead and wrapped Carm up from behind, leaving her no escape route. 

“I should've figured you'd be able to hear it too,” consoled Danny, stroking the vampire's hair, “it's just for another few minutes to call the pack, then we'll head out with whoever's shown.”

Carmilla pulled back slightly to look Danny in the eyes. “Head out? What's going on that you need the entire pack?”

“Warlock in the woods. We're going to track it down before it can do too much damage.”

“Warlock, huh? When do we leave?”

“The pack is heading out in a few minutes. You and Laura are welcome to remain here and help our hunters prepare for wounded,” Danny said. She tried to sound firm but it came out more as a plea.

“Sorry Xena,” Carmilla said, kissing her jaw, “no slight to your pack mates, but there is no way I'm letting you go into something like that without me at your side.”

Danny opened her mouth to protest when Laura's hand reaching around to rub her shoulder interrupted her.

“You'd be better off just agreeing to let her along now,” Laura said, meeting Danny's gaze, “you know the two of us are gonna try and sneak along after if she's not with you.”

Danny looked back and forth between the two sets of eyes: one of steel resolve, the other of a begging puppy. It was more than her own stubbornness could withstand. “Fine… but please be careful.”

“Only for you two,” purred Carmilla, nuzzling back into Danny's neck while Laura did likewise into hers.

“Well, isn't this just a sappy scene?” jeered Elsie, tossing the pipe in one hand as she came down the stairs, “do you want a few more hours or can we get this show on the road?”

Carmilla glared at the smirking woman on the steps. For a moment, she considered setting her on fire before Danny leaned down and whispered in her ear, “if you play nice, I'll do that thing you like once we're alone tonight.”

“The thing with the chocolate or the thing with the rope?”

Danny caught Carmilla’s ear in her teeth, biting lightly before letting go and softly husking, “yes,” before stepping away and sauntering into the next room to talk with the pack.

Carmilla stood there, transfixed by her lover's retreating form until her other love spoke into her other ear.

“Well, I don't know about you, but I'm motivated,” chuckled Laura, “you should catch up so you know the plan.” 

Laura gave Carmilla's butt a soft smack, sending a shiver through her body. Carmilla tried to glare at Laura, though her gaze lacked any sort of venom. She rolled her eyes to save face before quickly heading in the same direction as Danny.

Laura smiled and shook her head before turning to where Elsie was showing Laf the instrument, the latter fascinated with the intricate metalwork.

“So,” Laura said, drawing their attention, “what can I do to help here?

“Once the pack heads out,” said Elsie, leaving Laf to their investigations, “you can help us pull some of the cots we keep down in the athletic storage up into the front entrance here so we can deal with any wounded straight in the door. I don't suppose either of you knows any field medicine? “

“I have most of a masters in xenobiology,” said Lafontaine, “I don't have much hands on experience, but I'd be happy to lend a hand.”

“What about that girlfriend of yours? Isn't she always patching you up like a pair of old jeans?”

“I'll text Perr, but I can't make any guarantees,” Laf said, pulling out their phone, “cuts and burns from lab accidents are one thing, combat wounds may freak her out.”

“Do you really expect it to be that bad?” asked Laura, notably concerned.

Elsie shook her head. “Probably not, but better safe than sorry. We haven't lost a Summer to these woods in three generations, we're not about to start now.”

“Especially not to some poaching warlock,” said Danny, leading her pack members and Carmilla into the front chamber.

Laura rushed over, sliding to a stop in front of her girlfriends and dragging them both into a hug. “Watch out for each other. I love you both so much.”

“I'll keep an eye on her and rest of the pups as well, Cupcake” said Carmilla.

“Same here. Love you too.” Danny gave Laura a squeeze before breaking the hug and leading the way out the door.

Shifting as they went out the door, the pack gathered together on the lawn until Danny started to howl, which was quickly joined by the rest of the wolves. Shortly after, a replying howl echoed out of the northwest, causing Elsie to frown.

“The grove is roughly in that direction, that could mean it's going to attack again. You guys should hurry,” said Elsie, receiving a nod from Danny before she bolted into the woods, leading the wolves and panther forth.

x-x-x

“Well, I must say, contrary to what they say about being raised by packs of wolves, this place is almost immaculate,” said Perry.

“Well, that honestly had more to do with Mel being a neat freak than anything to do with the pack,” admitted Elsie, tugging a clean sheet tight over a cot. The set-up of the front room into an impromptu medic tent had gone smoothly. The remaining hunters, like Elsie, were spending their time putting the finishing touches in place.

“Either way,” observed Perry, “it makes for a safer environment if we do have to deal with any injuries here. Though hopefully, we're worrying over nothing.”

“That'd be nice,” said Laf from their perch on the stairs, where they were studying the pipe, “but given how they rushed off, I think this is gonna be intense.”

Perry coughed emphatically, nodding over to Laura who was obsessively smoothing down the sheets on another cot, worrying her lip in her teeth.

“But I'm sure they'll have no issues and they'll be home safe and sound,” they said, backpedaling quickly.

“Guys, I'm fine,” Laura reassured, “yes, I'm worried but I also trust both of them to be there for each other.”

“I can certainly believe that,” said Elsie, “when it comes to you or each other, those two are terrifying. I'd sooner dropkick a bear cub in front of its mother than test either of them.”

Lafontaine chuckled. “That is just dead on, I remember one ti—”

The front doors swung open just then to reveal Mel, face smeared with ash, a bow in one hand and a limping sister supported on her opposite shoulder.

“Look alive people!” she called, “we didn’t lose anyone, but we’ve got some wounded.” She helped her sister over to a chair to sit while the rest of the hunters filed in behind her, some hurt but most just exhausted and filthy. Most of the wolves, already shifted back into their human state, walked in with them. 

Behind them were the few that remained shifted. Most notably, a red furred wolf bearing a wounded pack member across her back and a panther, limping with a raised foreleg, just behind her.

Quickly, the waiting summers sprang to get everyone comfortable and treated, Perry running to help the scraped up hunters while Laf moved to help with the injured wolf that Danny carefully slid onto a cot, an angry blistered burn marring her side. Laura, less medically inclined, made herself useful fetching clean supplies for everyone. 

As the room quieted down, the uninjured and already treated sisters retiring to clean up and rest, Laura made her way over to the corner Carmilla had moved into to shift and heal.

“You okay?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Carmilla replied, “just got careless and got grazed.”

“Careless nothing,” said Mel, striding over, “vampire here saved our hides. We’re the ones that got careless. There were two warlocks, not one. The first one was as good as dealt with when Lawrence and company showed up at the grove, then the second attacked from behind. Got Annie over there really good and would have blasted Lawrence as well if pussycat here hadn’t dropped on it from above, getting scorched in the process.”

“I was protecting Danny, that’s it,” protested Carmilla.

“Result was the same, that’s all I care about,” Mel conjectured, “hell, I can respect that more. I find ‘selfless heroes’ dubious at best. Either way, good work Karnstein.” Mel tossed Carmilla a casual salute before wandering away to help elsewhere.

“Wow,” said Danny, walking up, “almost no one manages to impress Mel, fewer still without dying in the process. You should feel honored.”

“I just feel sore, and annoyed,” she complained, “I got a mouthful of warlock throat when I killed it. Demon blood is disgusting and I can still taste it.”

“Well this should help both,” said Danny, handing Carmilla a cup full of blood, “it’s just from the stash you keep here, but it’ll help you fully heal and we can replenish it later.”

Carmilla took a long drink and immediately began to feel better. “Thanks Danny, that helps a lot.”

“Well, I’m glad. I’d hate for you not to feel up to your reward for getting along tonight,” Danny whispered into her ear, causing her to go rigid and blush a little.

“Plus, you did kinda save Danny’s life,” husked Laura into her other ear, “I’d say that deserves a… bonus.” At that, Carmilla’s train of thought short circuited completely and a soft squeak was her only response.

“Well, I think that wraps up everything Perry and I can do here, should just be a matter of time and rest for everyone now,“ said Laf, wiping off their hands as they walked up, “you guys wanna come with us to grab a bite.”

“Nothankswegottagetbacktotheroomokaybye!” said Carmilla, jumping up and dragging her girlfriends towards the door.

“Uh, sorry Laf,” chuckled Danny, “we’ll have to take a raincheck. I’ll talk to you about studying again later.”

Laf smirked at the retreating group. “Okay, and hey, can I study that whistle of yours some more? I think I might be able to improve it.”

“Uh, sure. Yeah, go ahead, we have a spare, just—” Danny got out before she was dragged out the door.

“Awesome!”

“She didn’t realize that was a bad idea, did she?” asked Perry.

“Nope.”

“You’re going to make her regret that aren’t you.”

They grinned. “Probably”

x-x-x

Many hours later, Carmilla, Danny and Laura lay cuddled together in a sweaty, blissful haze.

“So, does that about cover it?” asked Danny, somewhat out of breath.

Carmilla’s only response was some vague euphoric babbling.

Laura giggled, “I think that means yes.”

Danny reached over and pulled them both as close to her as possible. “Good,” she said sleepily.

Gradually, the three of them began to drift off. They were all just about out when Danny sat up like she was stung, turning to stare at the dorm room door. Carmilla, likewise, was staring at the door like it had grown a head, leaving a confused Laura to stare at them in groggy confusion.

“What? What is it? Did you hear something?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes you write what you want, sometimes the story decides it wants to be something else entirely. The latter is what happened here. As always, let us know what you think.
> 
> -Juniper


	17. Whistle If You Don't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A phantom noise is bugging Danny, but dealing with it may prove amusing.

“Did you hear that?”

Charlie looked up from her sandwich at her mother who seemed to be concentrating on something. Remaining silent, she focused on the sounds around her. The house was filled with noise: the hum of the appliances, the rustling of the breeze through the trees outside, the rumble of the lawnmower engine, the occasional soft yowl and thump as Drix amused himself hunting killdeer; but aside from that, Charlie couldn't hear anything out of the ordinary.

“Sorry Mom,” she said, “I can't hear anything.”

Danny shrugged. “It's gone now. Maybe I'm just hearing things. “

“I hope not,” said Charlie mirthfully, “I'd really hoped we'd get at least another couple of decades out of you before you went nuts.”

Danny stared at her daughter incredulously. “Your concern is so touching,” she deadpanned.

“I'm nice like that.”

“I can tell.”

“So, what did you hear?”

“I dunno, it was high pitched, but I couldn’t hear it long enough to really get a feel for what it—” Danny’s head whipped around, “there it is again.”

Charlie gazed past her mother into the living room where she was looking. There wasn’t much to see however, just her Mama lounged on the couch reading a book, not paying them any interest.

“There’s nothing there Mom,” said Charlie.

“Yeah, it’s weird,” agreed Danny, “hey Carm?”

“Mmmm?” mumbled Carmilla, looking up.

“Did you hear anything just now?” asked Danny.

“Not that I noticed, though I’ve been pretty zoned out.”

“I can tell, have you moved once since this morning?”

Carmilla glanced at the clock on the wall and put her book down. “No, I haven’t. I suppose I should get up and have a drink. You know if Drix has had lunch.”

“I dunno, maybe,” chuckled Danny, “depends on how stupid the killdeer have been today.”

Carmilla made a face as she got up. “Ew, don’t make me sick Dan’. I’ll go talk to him,” she grumbled as she walked out the door into the yard.

“Well, if Mama didn’t hear it,” said Charlie, “maybe it was just your imagination.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

x-x-x

“Hello!” called Perry, knocking on the front door as she came in, Lafontaine bouncing along behind her.

“Back here, Perry,” came Laura’s voice, “we’re on the deck.”

It was a warm spring day which found the trio enjoying the sunshine in their backyard. Laura and Danny were cuddled up together on a lounger whilst Carmilla sprawled out as a panther on the lawn, sunning her belly.

“So, how are you all?” Perry asked cheerfully, grabbing a deck chair to sit down in.

“Not bad at all,” said Laura, making a show of snuggling into her wife before looking back at Perry, “the girls still over at your place?”

“Yes, they were all studying atop a mound of pillows in the living room when we left.”

“It looked really comfy,” added Lafontaine, “I'm gonna have to try that while doing research some time.”

“Just make sure you don't set them on fire,” teased Danny.

“I'll just use fireproof pillows,” said Laf sarcastically before looking thoughtful, ”actually, fireproof pillows could be useful, remind me to look into that later.”

“Sure, sweetie,” assured Perry, before turning back to Danny and Laura, “so what's Hendrix up to? I was surprised he didn't come over.”

“Over at Aaron's,” said Danny, “though he should be back—” Her head snapped around towards the yard, where it sounded like that elusive whistle had come from. She looked around, but there was nothing there but Carmilla, who was still zoned out, paws absently kneading the air.

“You okay?” asked Laura.

“Yeah, just that pesky whistle again,” Danny said suspiciously, “it's really annoying. It never plays long enough to tell exactly where it's coming from. I'm just about ready to toss someone into the lake.”

“Well, if someone's doing it on purpose, by all means. Just use some restraint if it turns out to be some random dog owner.”

“Well yeah, I'm not completely—” her head whipped back in the direction of the house, another shrill having rang out, ”—going out of my mind!”

Perry looked positively distressed while Laf seemed torn between intrigue and amusement.

“What's all the fuss about up here?” asked Carmilla, groggily walking up onto the deck.

“More of that noise,” explained Laura as Danny carefully examined the house, looking for any possible source.

“Mmm,” grunted Carmilla before squeezing herself into the lounger on Danny's other side and falling back to sleep.

“Yes, you seem so worried about my problem,” Danny said down to her before wrapping an arm around the vampire.

“Hey, I'm home!” called Drix from the house, “anyone want lunch? There's some chicken in the fridge and I'm making sandwiches.”

“That sounds lovely,” said Perry, “I'll come help you.” 

“Me too,” offered Danny, “I'm feeling a little antsy, doing something with my hands will help.” She got up, whines of protest coming from her wives at the disturbance.

“Fine,” grumbled Carmilla, reaching over to pull Laura close, “Laura's snugglier anyways”

x-x-x

“Hey Mom?” Drix flopped down onto the sofa next to Danny later that evening

“Yeah Drix?”

“I think I may know what's going on with that noise.”

“Please say it's something we can do about. “

“It is, if I'm right,” Drix explained, “I was home in time to hear those whistles earlier. I didn't see where the first came from, but it grabbed my attention so I was watching when Laf pressed something in their pocket right when the second one sounded.”

“Okay, but Laf hasn't been around for most of them.”

“My thought too, so I looked around the yard where you heard the first one and found this.” Drix produced a small plastic bulb and tube from his pocket which he proceeded to squeeze, producing a short, incredibly high whistle.

“That's it!” Danny exclaimed.

“I'd guess this is Laf's handiwork. Anyone could easily use one of these with the touch of a finger… or a paw.”

“Carmilla!” Danny gasped, “that little brat. Well, we've found them out so now we can get them to stop.”

“Well… we could,” Drix said, a mischievous smile growing on his face, “the big question is how much fun we want to have doing so.”

“I don't follow.”

“Well, we could just ask them to stop.” Drix started counting on his fingers. “We could try and get them back… or we could outsource the problem to Charlie and Aaron.”

“Hmmm…” Danny deliberated for a moment, “y'know, I kinda like option three.”

“Good, me too” said Charlie, popping out from around a corner, “no one messes with my mother but me.”

“How noble of you,” said Danny.

“Like I said, I'm a nice person,” said Charlie, “so, I have an idea of how to get the both of them—”

“Just Laf,” interrupted Danny, “I want to handle Carmilla with a more… personal touch.”

“Works for me,” agreed Charlie, “so first we'll need to see if Hazel can reproduce a few of these little beauties for us…”

x-x-x

“Danny, this chicken is delicious.”

“Thanks Gus,” said Danny, “it's an old family recipe.”

“What do you mean ‘old family recipe’?” interrupted Sue, “we got that recipe from a school fundraiser cookbook when you were eight.”

“Well, I never said which family, now did I?”

Gus laughed. “She's not wrong.”

Sue just rolled her eyes.

“Danny, this chicken is to die for,” said Laf, walking up, “mind if I have another piece?”

“No—,” Danny coughed, stifling a smirk, “sorry. No, go ahead.”

Laf looked suspiciously at Danny, before shrugging and taking a piece of chicken, wandering back to the party.

“I take it from your smirks they have yet to figure it out,” Gus asked.

“Yup,” said Danny, shoulders shaking with silent laughter.

“I wish I could hear it, is there a squeaker in each shoe?”

“Yup.”

They looked out across the yard, watching as nearly every pack member at the barbeque was watching Lafontaine as covertly as possible, many biting their lips and holding back tears as they struggled to suppress their laughter.

“Hey Laf!” called Aaron from where a game of pick-up soccer had started on the lawn, “we need another for even teams. We need someone to shadow Mom or we're going to get creamed.”

“I don't know how much use I'm gonna be against her,” admitted Laf, “but I'm always up for a game.” They set their plate down and jogged down to the grass. 

“How long you figure til someone starts laughing?” wondered Bev as they all gathered at the railing.

“Ten minutes, maybe?” guessed Danny.

“Ten?” scoffed Joe, “twenty bucks says someone buckles within five minutes.”

“You're on.” Danny glanced at her grandfather with a challenging smile.

For a couple of minutes, everyone watched the game with rapt interest and with every footstep Laf took, the number of snorts and snickers grew. Even the few humans present started to chuckle in the mirthful atmosphere.

Less than a minute later, Zach broke first and burst into joyful laughter, much to the delight of everyone around him.

“Told ya,” said Joe, “everyone's having enough trouble with their own amusement, but Zach has to deal with everyone's; joy of being an empath.”

“Damn,” said Danny, goodnaturedly, handing a twenty from her pocket to her grandfather.

Zach's laughter proved to be highly contagious. Soon, everyone was roaring with laughter. Even on the field, several players had collapsed into giggles, bringing the game to a grinding halt.

Laf could only stand dumbfounded at the mood that had taken everybody. They looked around the yard, trying to figure out what was so funny. It wasn't until they spotted Charlie and Aaron standing together, watching them with matching grins, that they started to realize what, or rather who, the subject of the joke might be.They jogged over to the pair, a fresh wave of laughter rising from the surrounding crowd.

“OK you two,” they said, fixing them with a stern look, “what did you do?”

The pair glanced at one another before Charlie stuck out her hand. “Your shoe, if you please.”

They looked confused, but slipped their left shoe off and handed it over without comment. With a bit of work, she popped off a false cap on the heel, removed something and handed it to Lafontaine. “Look familiar?” she asked smugly.

Laf took the familiar looking bulb from Charlie, realization slowly dawning on their face. “Lemme guess, one in the other shoe as well?”

“You know it.”

“Well, I have to hand it to you guys, this was genius,” Laf conceded with a grin, “I bow to the masters.”

Laf gave them a nod before turning around towards everyone else and bowing down with a dramatic flourish, drawing joyful cheers and applause from everyone gathered. Straightening back up, they caught Danny's eyes and tossed her a friendly salute.

Danny returned the salute before walking over to where Laura and Carmilla were sitting and gesturing towards the woods. “Well, that was fun. Would either of you like to go for a walk while we still have some sun?”

The two of them nodded and got up. Danny wrapped an arm around each and they headed out into the trees, towards the lake.

x-x-x

“Y'know, we should really put some furniture out here,” suggested Carmilla, “I mean we find ourselves by the lake often enough, it'd be nice to have a place to sit.”

“Hmm, you're right,” agreed Danny, “I'll talk to dad about finding a picnic table or something else big enough to leave without worrying about weather or theft.”

“Good idea, it'd be nice to come out here for picnics,” said Laura before changing the topic, “so, you think Laf will try to get you back or are we done with this particular exchange?”

Danny chuckled. “I think Laf is probably done. I, however, have one more loose end to tie up.”

“And what would that be?” asked Laura, already knowing where this was going.

“Well, my dear Laura,” said Danny, falling into her lecturer voice, “while I've dealt with Laf, there is still the matter of their accomplice.”

“Accomplice?” asked Laura with false naiveté.

“Oh would you two stop it?” Carmilla said with a smile, “I know that you've had me dead to rights since I misplaced my squeaker.”

Danny and Laura both have Carmilla a deadpan look before turning to each other.

“Well, that was disappointing,” said Laura.

“I know, spoiled all our fun.”

“She did confess though.”

“True, I guess that was the point.”

“I suppose we should let her explain herself.”

“Seems only fair.”

The two turned back to her, still expressionless.

“Okay firstly, stop that, it's creepy,” said Carmilla, leaning back a little from her wives, “secondly, I'm not even sorry, it was pretty fun. Admittedly, if you'd come to me first, I probably would have apologized, but it's pretty hard to feel remorseful after enjoying an evening of Franken-squeak.”

“Well,” said Danny, “that seals it. I guess we have no choice.”

“Yep, too bad,” agreed Laura.

“Wait,” said Carmilla, “no choice to do— oh no. No. No. Wait. Nononono. Nooooo!” 

x-x-x

“So where'd you guys get these,” Laf asked Charlie and Aaron. They were gathered around the deck table, as Laf examined the false caps, ”this isn't one of the ones I made, this is more compact. Looks more durable as well”

“That'd be Hazel's handywork,” Aaron supplied, “don't be too hard on her for helping us.”

“Hard on her? She not only mimicked my design, but improved it. I'm totally baking her a pie for this!”

“Isn't eating that much carbon carcinogenic?” teased Charlie.

“Please,” they scoffed, “you think I could be married to a master like Perry as long as I have and not pick up a few tricks? I make a mean pie.”

“That you do,” agreed Perry, walking up behind and kissing them on top of their head, “that mango pie experiment you tried I think was particularly successful. Why I…” Perry's voice trailed off as her attention was drawn towards the yard. Her corners of her mouth rose into an amused smile.

The other three, noticing her distraction, turned to see what she was looking at and quickly grew smiles of their own. Carmilla, Danny and Laura came wandering out from the tree line, arm in arm and absolutely soaking wet.

“You guys fall in?” called Laf.

“They threw me in,” Carmilla groused.

“Laura said I could,” Danny contended.

“It's true,” Laura admitted, “I did.”

“Wow, I guess I got off easy,” said Laf, “so that explains her, what about you two?”

“Well, then I pushed Danny in,” Laura explained.

“Why?” asked Perry

“Seemed like it'd be funny. It was.”

“And then they dragged you in?” asked Laf.

“Nope!” chirped Laura, “by then, Carm was back on her feet, so I jumped into her arms and sent us both in.”

“My parents, everyone,” Charlie said through chuckles.

“It's pretty warm out,” said Perry, “but you've been in sopping wet clothes for a while, you should all probably hop into a hot shower to warm up.”

“Ooh,” said Danny, “that sounds nice.”

“Lemme grab you some towels so you can get upstairs without dripping everywhere,” offered Charlie, getting up and wandering inside.

“So,” said Perry, “does that mean you're all done with this?”

“Yeah,” said Laf, “it's certainly played out as a prank, though I'll probably keep tinkering, maybe with Hazel’s help. See if we can’t find some practical use for them.”

“Smart idea,” said Danny, “keep me in the loop if you come up with something.”

Laf nodded as Charlie emerged with some bath sheets for her mothers, who quickly bundled themselves.

“I started the shower while I was up there, so it should be nice and warm,” said Charlie.

“Thanks sweetie,” said Laura, leading the way to the door.

“Oh and if you need anything else,” said Charlie, eyes sparkling with mischief, “just whistle.”

Everyone groaned as the trio disappeared into the house to warm up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the chapter I meant to write, sorta. This and to a much lesser extent the previous chapter were inspired by a funny little sketch comic by [bigmammallama5](http://bigmammallama5.tumblr.com/post/119612706358/laf-blows-a-dog-whistle-near-danny-and-shes-like)
> 
> Let us know what you think!
> 
> -Juniper


	18. Be Who You Want To Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sky and Mercy spend an afternoon playing in a world of their imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sky,10; Mercy, 11; Hendrix, 13; Charlie, Hazel and Aaron, 14

Rain poured down onto Champion City, making the dark seem to close in even more. The criminal element loved nights like this. On a clear evening, the shadowed streets were dangerous enough, but on a night like tonight, they grew truly bold. On a night like tonight, the weak would fall prey to the strong. On a night like tonight, the city would need the protection of… The Sky Watcher.

During the day, no one would guess that humble yet talented dancer, Kelly Kristie, had any concerns beyond rehearsing for her next show, but once the sun went down, she would don her dark-red suit and mask and venture out as the defender of the weak and protector of the innocent.

But, she did not work alone. Ever at her side, joining her in her vigilance was Small Mercy, the Watcher’s ever faithful sidekick.

x-x-x

“Wait, sidekick?!” exclaimed Mercy.

“Well… yeah,” said Sky, from her perch on the deck railing, “every hero needs a sidekick.”

“I don’t want to be a sidekick,” whined Mercy, “I wanna be a hero too.”

“Ugh, fine.”

x-x-x

But, she did not work alone. Ever at her side, joining her in her vigilance was Small Mercy, the Watcher’s ever faithful partner in justice.

_ “Better?” _

_ “Much better.” _

They began this night like any other, perched high above the city streets; watching, listening, for any sign of trouble amongst the citizens below. Some nights would pass quietly, without so much as a whisper from the city's underbelly. However, tonight was not such a night.

The wailing klaxon of an alarm echoed distantly through the air. The heroes shared a nod before Mercy leapt in the air and shrank to the size of a mouse, landing on Sky's shoulder. Confident her partner was secure, she pushed off and flew up into the air.

Skyscrapers blurred past as they zeroed in on the noise. Descending quickly, they found themselves at the smashed front door of the  _ Gaspillage D'argent _ ; a high end jeweller that served the city's rich and powerful.

Landing gingerly so as not to dislodge her passenger, Sky set down in front of the shop and stepped forward into the entry. Broken glass crunched under her booted feet, drawing the attention of the shadowed figures within. Interrupted in their activities, they stood and faced the newcomers. Meeting the eyes of the heroes, they raised their chins defiantly before one finally spoke.

“Mercy, why are you clutched onto Sky’s shoulder?”

x-x-x

Charlie and Aaron gazed curiously at the younger kids, their card game on the coffee table forgotten for the moment.

“We’re playing superheroes,” said Mercy, “I’m shrunk and Sky is giving me a ride.”

Charlie smiled at her sister. “Superheroes, huh? So you can shrink, what else can you do?”

“I have a super loud voice,” replied Mercy.

Charlie chuckled softly, “of course you do.”

“Be nice,” whispered Aaron, swatting Charlie softly before returning his attention to the girls, “how about you Sky? What cool stuff can you do?”

“I can fly and I’m super quick, like flips and dodging everything,” said Sky proudly.

“You mean agility?” suggested Aaron.

“Yeah!”

“So, what are you great heroes doing now?” asked Charlie.

“Investigating a jewellery store robbery,” said Mercy, “we’re about to face the jewel thieves.”

“Oh are you now?” said Aaron, a grin crossing his face as he shared a look with Charlie.

“I don’t suppose you guys have any villains yet?” asked Charlie.

Mercy lit up with a smile, “Well…”

x-x-x

Meeting the eyes of the heroes, they raised their chins defiantly before one finally spoke.

“I thought you said we’d have time before any do-gooders showed up,” said one.

“We would have if you’d been a little faster cracking open the vault,” said the other, “but no matter, we’ve got what we came for.”

“Who are you?” demanded Mercy, leaping down and returning to her normal size.

“Prepare for trouble!”

_ “Aaron.” _

_ “C’mon, please?” _

_ “No.” _

_ “Fine, you’re no fun.” _

“I must say,” said the first, “I'm somewhat disappointed that our reputation doesn't precede us, but no matter, the entire world will know who we are before long.” She took a large crystal from her partner, inspecting it briefly before depositing it into the satchel on her hip. “However, for now, allow us to introduce ourselves. I am Doctor Ember, this is my associate, Tundra, and you… are in our way out of here.”

“Well, we’re sorry to inconvenience you,” rebutted Sky, “I’m afraid that robbery is a crime, so I’ll have to ask you to put those items down and come with us.”

“Us? Go with you?” scoffed Tundra, “you must think we’re idiots if you think we’re going to give up now. We have plans for these little baubles, so we really must be going.”

“And you think we’re just going to let you leave?” asked Sky.

“No, but it doesn’t really matter,” said Ember nonchalantly, “Tundra, if you’d be so kind.”

“My pleasure, Doc.”

The temperature of the room began to noticeably drop as a thick rime of frost began to extend from Tundra’s feet across the floor. The heroes took a cautious step back, not sure what to expect next as Ember produced a contraption from a pouch on her belt, which quickly began to glow in her gloved hand.

“Well, it’s been fun, but we must be going,” needled Ember as she dropped the device to the frozen floor.

The device hit the floor and began to roll, melting the frost with an aggressive hiss. The room rapidly filled with a thick mist, obscuring the thieves from the heroes’ vision. Worried about losing their quarry, Mercy yelled a short sonic blast into the fog before surging forward in hopes of catching the crooks before they made good their escape.

“Mercy!” cried Sky, trying to caution her partner.

Mercy, however, ignored her and dashed to where the pair had been standing to find nothing left. Within seconds, the fog began to settle leaving an empty store and a confused pair of heroes,

x-x-x

“Well, whatever made this thing tick?” called Mercy, her voice faint from inside Ember’s gadget, “it’s unrecognizable now. Everything in here’s been reduced to slag.”

“Nothing we can use to trace them?”

“I doubt it,” said Mercy as she grew to normal size before picking up the device, “unless there’s something unique about the metal they used, this is a dead end.”

“So, what do you think Detective?” The Watcher asked the scene investigator.

“I think you let a couple of perps get away.”

_ “Perps? Really Drix?” _

_ “Quiet Aaron. You’ve escaped. Escaped criminals don’t sit around making fun of the police investigating them.” _

“You say that like we just let them walk,” protested Sky, “we got beaten, it happens.”

The detective held her gaze before shrugging, “heh, I suppose even you supers can’t win ‘em all.”

“Exactly,” said Mercy, “and now, we’d appreciate any assistance you can give us in tracking them down so we can return the favour.”

“Well, on the surface, it appears to be just your run of the mill jewel heist. Nothing particularly notable about the jewellery taken, aside from it all being ridiculously expensive. However, I took a closer look at the inventory, given we had the bad magic act involved.”

_ “Hey!” _

_ “Quiet in the peanut gallery.” _

“There were several crystal lens pieces taken as well. They’re worth a pittance compared to the gems and precious metals, but still incredibly unique. According to the owner, they were being made for a local astrophysics lab for some experiment. Incredibly pure and meticulously polished.”

“Lenses?” asked Sky, “what for?”

“Not a clue.”

“Then I guess our next move is to talk to the scientists,” suggested Mercy.

“Sounds good,” agreed the detective, “the lab is just up at the university, in the observatory.”

“Thanks Detective,” said Sky, “let us know if the CSI’s find anything.”

“Will do. Good luck.”

x-x-x

After arriving at the university the next morning, it took minimal investigation to locate the lab in question, just one floor beneath the observatory dome. Sky Watcher and Small Mercy walked into a brightly lit room crammed with an assorted mish-mosh of computers and equipment, but no people to be seen.

“Hello?” called Sky, “is there anyone here?”

“Hallo!” came a voice from somewhere towards the back of the lab, “I vill be vith you in just ein minuten.”

What followed was a series of bangs and clunks that the two heroes would have found quite alarming had the whoops and cackles that accompanied the noise not been even more disturbing. Shortly, however, the noise abated and a woman with an ash streaked lab coat and scorched safety goggles made their way towards them with a bright, excited smile.

“Mein gott, I love zis job,” she said, “zo, how can I help you? Mein name is Doktor Hasel von Wissenschaft, head researcher in collection of zolar radiation.”

x-x-x

“Ok, hold on,” interrupted Charlie, “Hazel, what is up with that voice?”

“What?” Hazel protested, “I'm being a German scientist, it's a great cliché.”

“I think it's fun,” said Mercy.

“Me too,” agreed Sky.

“Well, I'm glad someone appreciates my efforts,” Hazel said, satisfied.

“I'm mostly just curious as to where you found a pair of safety goggles,” said Drix.

“Oh, Laf just keeps a spare pair here just in case.”

“In case of what?”

“Science, of course!”

“Of course,” said Drix, ”not sure what I was expecting. Just please be careful with Moms’ glassware, I'd hate for you to get caught up in the character and break something.”

“Seriously?” scoffed Hazel, “I'd never do that.”

x-x-x

“Good to meet you, Doctor,” said Sky, “me and my partner are seeking out a pair of fugitives and we're hoping you may be able to assist us in our investigation.”

“Of course, of course,” replied Hasel, “I vould be happy to help in any vay zat I can.”

“Did you order a set of large crystal lenses from a local jeweller?”

“Ja, zey are a key component in an experiment I am planning, “ said the doctor, her eyes lighting up with excitement, “you zee, once i attach zem to the telescope upstairs, zey vill let me focus und refract zunlight here into my laboratory zo I can analyze it and figure out how to capture it in its pure form.”

“Well, that sounds absolutely fascinating Doc,” said Mercy, “but I'm afraid the experiment will have to be put on hold. The lenses were stolen from the jeweller last night.”

“Vat?!” yelled Hasel, “by whom?”

“Are you familiar with a Dr. Ember?”

“Ember?!” Hasel grabbed a beaker, raised her arm and—

_ “Hazel!” _

_ “Wha— oops, sorry. Guess I got too into it.” _

_ “You think?” _

—and, thinking better of her action, placed it calmly back on the counter.

“Doktor Ember vas a colleague of mine,” fumed Hasel, “she has a brilliant mind, but she is obsessed. She vanted to use the big observatory in the mountains for the experiment and I couldn't make her understand zat ve veren't ready to collect on zat scale yet; all ve vould get are crude bombs.”

“Bombs?” said Mercy, notably worried.

“Ja, I mean vhy vould you vant to level a few city blocks vhen you could bring beautiful, round-the-clock zunshine to the world.”

“Yes, why indeed,” replied Sky, “well, thank you Doctor but I believe we need to make haste.”

“Vhy do you— oh yes, the bombs,” realised Hasel, “ja ja, go!”

With a quick thanks, the heroes quickly headed from the lab and out towards the mountains.

x-x-x

The observatory was silent as they landed outside. The enormous white dome, towering over them, was closed shut.

“Maybe they decided to use a different observatory,” speculated Mercy.

“Maybe, but I doubt it,” replied Sky, “Ember doesn't strike me as someone with the patience to go looking for another facility. Let's go take a look around.”

Entering through the front doors, the two found themselves in a nondescript white hallway. They moved along it slowly, checking doors as they went, finding mostly small offices and storage closets.

Sky was pulling one office door shut when she caught a flicker of movement out of the corner of her eye. Moving on instinct, she spun out of the way of a jet of ice that passed through the space that her head had occupied a fraction of a second earlier.

“Huh, I'd heard you were quick,” mused Tundra, “no matter though, just makes things more interesting.” He grinned predatorily before throwing a barrage of ice blasts down the hallway.

Sky twisted and turned, sliding around the freezing cold projectiles easily. However, while she was busy constantly dodging, she was unable to close the distance to their attacker.

Mercy, hoping to take advantage of Tundra's focus on her partner, shrunk down and slipped along the corner of the hallway, trying to get behind him. She was most of the way when she saw him smirk as he spotted her. Before she knew it, a blast of cold hit her, encasing her in the coldest ice she'd ever felt. She could barely move, breathe or even think.

Panicking slightly, she returned to normal size, breaking her way out of the icy prison. She slumped to the floor, shivering, helpless to watch as Sky fought on, alone.

“Well, it seems we're at an impasse,” chuckled Tundra, “I can't hit you and you can't get close to me.”

“You could always surrender,” offered Sky, “I'd ask the courts to be lenient.”

“Hmm, as tempting as that sounds, I think I'd prefer a different option,” he said, “what do you think, Ember?”

Sky barely had time to register the arrival of his partner when she heard the clink of an object landing near her. The last thing she remembered before slipping into darkness was world around her disappearing in a flash of noise and light.

x-x-x

When Sky came to, she found herself bound to a wall with restraints of ice. She looked around the room, trying to orient herself. She was inside what looked like the observatory's dome, a huge telescope dominating the room. Mercy was a short distance away inside a chamber of solid ice. She looked cold and angry, but otherwise fine.

“Ah, Ms. Watcher. So glad you join us,” gloated Ember, who was tinkering with some elaborate contraption at the base of the telescope “we're just about to make our first Sun Flare.”

She threw a switch and the massive doors on the dome opened to the sky, letting sunlight into the space. The massive telescope tilted until it was pointed directly at the sun, a noticeable beam of light pouring from the eyepiece into an elaborate array of lenses positioned just beneath. A low hum filled the air as a device, just a bit smaller than a person, began to glow.

Sky and Mercy shared a glance, realizing they were running out of time. Mercy looked meaningfully at Ember and then back to Sky before she started to sing softly, pacing the small chamber. 

Hoping she caught Mercy's meaning correctly, Sky returned her attention to the Doctor in hopes of stalling her. “I don't understand,” she said, “what do you get out of making bombs?”

Ember paused, looking up at Sky incredulously. “What do I get? I get the same things any logical person wants: wealth, power, respect.”

“I hate to break it to you, but you and your icy friend aren't going to be able to take over the world by yourselves, no matter how fancy a weapon you got.“

“Please, I don't want to rule the world. That honestly sounds so boring,” scoffed Ember, “I plan to sell the Sun Flares. After I level Champion City with two or three, governments around the world will be clamouring to buy my technology. After that, it'll be a simple matter to settle into my new life of wealth, and unhindered research, in whichever country makes me the best offer.”

Mercy was singing louder now, not settling on any tune but simply sliding from note to note, seemingly at random.

Tundra walked up and pounded on the ice, “quiet down in there.”

“Come in here and make me,” she retorted, returning to her singing as he fumed outside, unable to do anything without also setting her free.

“So,” said Sky, returning Ember's attention to her, “you would kill millions of people, just for your personal financial gain?”

“Yeah, that about sums it up.”

“Well, I'm certainly going to feel much better about punching you once I get loose.”

“Oh? And how do you plan to get yourself loose?”

“Well, I'm not going to,” said Sky, “she is.”

Mercy’s singing had finally narrowed down to a single note. Pausing momentarily to toss Sky a grin, she took a deep breath and sang.

The pure tone rang out at an incomprehensible decibel level, making Tundra and Ember clap their hands over their ears. The ice of the chamber and Sky's restraints both started vibrating roughly, cracks very rapidly crossing the surface before shattering completely. Tundra, right next to the chamber, was hit across the head by a chunk of flying ice, knocking him out cold.

_ “Aaron, that was a terrible pun.” _

_ “Hazel, it was funny and you know it.” _

Free of the restraints, Sky took off across the room towards the telescope, barrelling into the network of lenses, sending them crashing to the floor in an explosion of broken glass.

“No!” yelled Ember, “without a full charge the Flare will destabilize. It'll destroy this whole building, all my research!” She rushed to her console and began furiously typing. The Flare had begun whining with a rising tone that was quickly approaching a screech.

Mercy ran up, an unconscious Tundra over her shoulder. “I think we need to get out of here, now.”

“Ember, come on!” cried Sky, “we need to go!”

“No, I can still save it!”

Sky boggled at the Doctor before grabbing Tundra from Mercy. “C'mon, hop on.”

Mercy did so, grabbing hold. “But what about—”

“I'll have to come back for her. I can't carry them both,” she said before taking off, carrying them out through the dome’s open doors. Setting down about half a mile away, she gently set Tundra down. “Keep an eye on him, I'm going to go try to get Ember—”

A flash of light interrupted her as an explosion tore the observatory apart, both of them closing their eyes against the glare. When they looked back, no trace of the building remained, the rock where it had one stood glowing a dull red from the intense heat.

“—out.” Sky's shoulders fell in defeat.

“Come on,” said Mercy, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, “let's go home.”

x-x-x

“Well, a job well done all told,” commented the detective.

“I just wished it had turned out better,” replied Sky.

“Fair enough, but you stopped a mad person and saved countless lives. The city owes you a debt,” he said, “oh, and before I forget, this letter for you showed up just before you did.” He handed Sky an envelope just with their names and no return address.

Turning the envelope over in her hands, Sky tore it open, reading the letter inside, notably lighting up.

“It's from Ember, she's alive!” she said before her mood sobered, “and she'll be back…”

x-x-x

“Dun dun dun!” sang Charlie, making everyone laugh.

“That was fun, we'll have to do it again sometime,” said Aaron.

“Yeah, though I want to be something other than the crazy scientist next time,” said Hazel.

“You sure?” asked Charlie, “you were so good at it.”

“Just comes with my lineage, I guess.”

All the kids laughed as the telltale sound of the front door opening signalled the return of parents.

“Hello! We're home!” said Laura, entering the kitchen carrying a bag of groceries.

“Hey Mom,” said Drix, “need any help?”

“Nah, your Moms have the rest of it. We just picked up enough to make dinner. So, how were things here all day?”

The kids took a moment to glance around at each other before Mercy looked at her mother with a smile.

“Super.”

The kids broke out laughing, leaving Laura standing there wondering what was so funny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to make a chapter of the kids playing make-believe. I'd also been entertaining the idea of a superhero au lately. I think I reached an interesting compromise. Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> -Juniper


	19. Question like a Balloon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie helps Aaron take the next step towards his and Drix's forever.

It was early in the evening when Charlie and Aaron arrived at the pub. Grabbing a couple of drinks from the bar, they easily found a out-of-the-way table to sit at to nurse their beverages.

The pub wasn't a regular destination for either of them, but at this time of night, it tended to be quiet which made it a great place to go out and shoot the breeze. Aaron, however had a more immediate topic he wished to discuss.

“Charlie, could you do me a favour?”

“Sure, Aaron. Just let me go grab a shovel and we'll find a nice isolated spot in the woods.”

“Why do you always go immediately to hiding a body?”

“What? Are you saying that you'd rather hide bodies with Drix and not me? Aaron, I'm hurt.” Charlie stuck out her lower lip in a dramatic pout.

“Oh come off of it. You know you're first on my corpse disposal list.”

“As an accomplice or a victim?”

“Yes.”

The two friends burst into peals of laughter, clinking their glasses together.

“So, what is this favour you need that required pulling me away from my beautiful wife for an evening?”

“Ok, if you wanna try playing that card, make sure I'm not already aware Hazel is down in Laf's lab, busy trying to break off a piece of the universe.”

Charlie laughed. “Damn, alright. I guess I'm slipping in my old age.”

“Nah,” he disagreed, “I'm just that good.”

“Sure you are.”

“Scoff all you want, we both know the truth,” said Aaron, “and as for the favour…” He paused, gathering his courage. “Could you help me go ring shopping?”

Charlie froze in the middle of a sip, meeting his gaze over the rim of the glass. Calmly, she swallowed her drink and placed the glass back onto the tabletop.

“I'm sorry, what?”

“Uh, could you help me go ring shopping?” Aaron proceeded uncertainly, “I kinda want to… y'know… propose to Hendrix.”

Charlie's expression remained blank as she silently studied his face for a moment. Seeming to settle on something, she pushed back her chair, getting up and walking around the table until she was standing next to him. 

Aaron, for his part, found the entire ordeal incredibly intimidating. “I mean, I love him so much; I want to be with him forever,” he babbled, “and you already know a bit about ring—”

Charlie surged forward, wrapping her arms around her friend, practically dragging him out of his chair into a hug. “Oh my goodness, Aaron! This is fantastic,” she exclaimed, “of course I'll help you go ring shopping.” Letting him loose, she returned to her seat, absolutely beaming.

“Thanks Charlie,” he said, “your support means so much.”

“Hey, don't say that like there was a chance I was gonna disapprove or something,” Charlie scoffed before raising her glass, “to my future brother-in-law.”

“To my eternal sister-in-arms,” he replied, clinking his glass with hers.

x-x-x

Several days later, the pair found themselves on the sidewalk outside a modest storefront.

“This is the place where I got Hazel’s ring,” said Charlie, a nostalgic smile crossing her face as she looked up at the sign, “and where we found my engagement ring as well, and our wedding rings to boot. Their stuff is a little off the beaten path, but it’s wonderful and doesn’t cost an arm and a leg.”

“Sounds great,” said Aaron, pulling open the door.

“Hello,” said the woman behind the counter, pleasantly, “how can I— oh hi! Good to see you again. Carli, was it?”

“Close, it’s Charlie,” she chuckled.

“Right, sorry,” said the woman, looking chagrined.

Charlie waved off her concerns. “Not to worry, I haven’t been here in months. I’m kinda impressed you got as close as you did.”

“Good, I’m glad,” she said, “well, my name is Alice. Was there anything in particular I can help you find today?”

“Well…” Charlie motioned to Aaron.

“I’m looking for an engagement ring for my boyfriend,” he explained.

Alice’s face lit up. “Oh, you have come to the right place. Our selection of men's rings is just over here,” she said, leading them along the glass countertop to a display of rings in a surprising selection of colours and styles.

“Oh boy,” said Aaron, “actually having them in front of me really makes this daunting.”

“Well, fortunately,” said Charlie, slinging an arm over his shoulders, “that’s what you brought me along for.”

Over the next hour, the three compared and debated the various rings the store had on offer until they were left with a single ring sitting on the counter in front them; a wide ring of burnished silver with a single sapphire inset along the ring’s front edge.

Aaron reached down and picked the ring up, giving it another inspection. “I think this is the one. This feels like Drix to me, cool and unique.”

“I have to agree with you,” said Charlie, ”though I did like that bronze one.”

“That was a neat ring,” he replied, “but I just can’t see citrine suiting Drix all that well. Seems like much more a Hazel thing.”

“Hmm, you’re right,” mused Charlie before smiling at Alice, “I’ll have to consider something like that for Christmas.”

“I think we have something like that in stock,” said Alice, “but for now, do you think you’ve come to a decision?”

Aaron bit his lip, considering the ring in his hand. “Yes… yes, it’s this one.” 

“Excellent,” she said, taking the ring, “I’ll get this wrapped and rung up for you.” She turned and bounced off towards the register.

“I’m going to ask Drix to marry me,” Aaron said, tears welling up. He rubbed his eyes with his sleeve, smiling at Charlie.

“Yes you are,” she replied, pulling him into a hug.

x-x-x

“Aaron, it’s beautiful!” cooed Laura as she and her wives gathered around the small wooden box in Aaron’s outstretched hand.

“I have to hand it to you, Aaron,” agreed Carmilla, “you managed to avoid buying a gaudy piece of glass. Good work.”

“Thank...you?”

“That means she’s impressed Aaron,” interjected Danny, gently elbowing Carmilla, “so, what brings you by? This is a nice ring and all, but we would have seen it eventually and somehow I don’t expect that you think you need our permission to marry him.”

“I dunno, asking the three mothers of my male gay life partner for the traditional permission to marry has a certain delicious irony, don’t you think?” Aaron grinned, wiggling his eyebrows

Carmilla laughed, “alright, I don’t care what the real reason you’re here is, I’m giving you permission to marry him just for that reasoning alone.” She held out her fist, Aaron meeting it in a bump.

“Anyways,” Aaron continued, “the reason I’m here is to ask your help in setting up the proposal.”

“Done,” said Laura, her wives nodding in agreement, “what do you need?”

“Well, I’d like to do it in front of family, if you could host a barbeque…”

x-x-x

“So do any of you know what this little shindig is about?” asked Ruth, little Hayden cradled in her arms.

“You need a reason for a party in this family?” asked Chance, distracted by his nephew, Aero, whom he had cradled in his own arms. “We don’t need a reason, no. No we don’t, do we little one?” he babbled as the infant simply stared back at him in quiet wonder.

“Normally? no,” replied Ruth, smiling at the man cooing over her son, “but Carmilla was unusually insistent that we come.”

“Same with Danny, now that you mention it,” pondered Chance, “I wonder what’s going on.”

“Well, isn’t it obvious?” asked Bev, inserting herself into the conversation. She gestured to Hayden, “may I?”

“Sure.” Ruth gently handed off her daughter to her great-grandmother. “So, what’s so obvious?”

“Oh, you youngins have so much to learn?”

“Youngin?” scoffed Ruth, “I’m nearly four times your age.”

“You’re still new to being in a family, you’re a youngin,” emphasized Bev, at which Ruth pouted, “but what’s obvious is someone is planning an announcement. For what I’m not certain yet. I’m hoping a pregnancy, but since none of the kids seem inclined yet and accidents aren’t really possible for any of them, I’ll just have to make due with these little ones for now.” She rocked the infant in her arms, cooing at her softly.

“Huh, makes sense,” admitted Ruth, “we’ll just have to wait and see. Now, if you two don’t mind watching my kids for a minute, I’m going to go grab myself a burger and some blood. I am ravenous.”

“Anytime Ruth.”

x-x-x

It was just after dinner when Charlie sat down next to Aaron on the deck steps.

“Just about time,” she mentioned, “you ready?”

“Well, not really,” he chuckled, “but, hell, I’m gonna do this anyway. Does Drix have any idea?”

“If he does, I haven’t noticed. He’s been talking with Sky and Mercy most of the evening.”

Aaron glanced back at the table where his hopefully-soon-to-be-fiancé sat, talking intently with the two women.

“Good, that should really make this memorable then. Could you go grab all the ‘rents, make sure they have a good view?”

“Not sure if you noticed, but my moms have had their viewing spot staked out for twenty minutes now,” she pointed out, gesturing down the deck to where they were already at the deck railing, arm in arm in arm, “but yes, I’ll get your Mom and Dad. I’d hate for you to get engaged just to get murdered by your mother cause she missed it.”

“Thanks Char,” he said, wrapping an arm around her for a side-hug.

Returning the hug, she got up and went off to retrieve Elsie and Hunter. Aaron also got up and, after making sure Drix wasn’t watching him, made his way down around the side of the deck, finding the sunflowers and he’d stashed underneath earlier. He looked up, making sure his family was there before taking a deep breath and nodding up to Laura, who grabbed a remote from her pocket and hit play.

From the deck speakers, a lovely piano melody began to play, grabbing everyone’s attention. Aaron’s stomach gave another flutter as he turned and walked into the middle of the yard, bouquet in hand. By the time he made it to the mat that Charlie had quietly laid out earlier, every eye in the yard was on him, smiles replacing confusion on each face, one by one. 

Finding his place, Aaron looked to where Drix was sitting, a look of surprise on his face, which made Aaron smile. He held out his hand, beckoning his boyfriend to join him. 

Looking to Mercy and Sky, who also looked highly surprised, he got up and made his way down the steps to the lawn, joining Aaron on the mat.

“I thought you were only going to repeat this if we needed to get back together again,” Drix joked, fighting tears.

“Well, waiting for that was taking forever so I decided, ‘hey, what the hell?’,” said Aaron, offering the bouquet to Drix, who accepted them happily, “besides, it seemed like a good time because there was something I need to ask you.” Keeping his gaze locked with Drix, he grabbed the ring box from his pocket and got down on one knee.

“Hendrix,” Aaron began, “for as long as I can remember, you’ve been a bright spot to me. Ever since we were kids, we were more than friends; we were family. Then, when we got together, you brought a warmth into my life that I don’t understand how I ever lived without and can’t imagine being without ever again. My hope is that in our time together, I have managed to return at least a portion of the brightness and warmth into your life as you have given to mine and, if you’ll let me, I’d like to spend the rest of our lives doing my best to return that warmth and light in full. So, my question is…” Aaron opened the box, revealing the ring, “Hendrix Hollis, will you marry me?”

The world seemed to slow and go silent as Aaron waited for a response. Drix's gaze, which had been locked on the ring, slowly moved up to Aaron's face as his expression of shock gave way to a smile, tears beginning to roll down his face.

“Yes,” he said softly, nodding gently, “yes, of course I will!”

A whoop of joy rang out from the deck along with murmurs of approval and adoration. The two men looked at their collected family with a smile before returning their attention to each other.

Beginning to tear up himself, Aaron struggled to remove the ring from the box, his hands were trembling so much. Taking a breath, he grasped the small piece of jewellery and held out his hand for Drix's.

Setting aside the bouquet, Drix placed his left hand in Aaron's. Aaron met Drix’s eyes, endless love pouring between the two men, and slid the ring into Drix's finger. By now, both men were crying but grinning so wide, it looked like their faces might split in two

Aaron stood up, clasping Drix's hand between both of his. He was about to lean in for a kiss when he felt something warm slip onto his own ring finger. Looking down, he found a gorgeous silver and emerald ring glimmering up at him. He returned his gaze to his new fiancé, eyes wide with astonishment.

Drix chuckled. “You may have beat me to the moment, but that's been sitting in my pocket for weeks. I sure as hell wasn't going to let it go to waste.”

Aaron laughed before wrapping a hand behind Hendrix's head and pulling him in for a deep, long kiss. The men remained lost in each other until the moment was pierced by the clear tone of a wolf howl.

The howl, which had started with Danny, was soon picked up by every wolf there. Carmilla and Ruth, not to be left out, shifted as well and added their deep roars underneath the chorus of wolves. Drix and Aaron stood in each other’s arms, basking in the warmth and acceptance of the pack. The howl soon gave way yips and barks as the pack began playing around the yard, celebrating the moment as only they could.

Aaron took Drix’s hand and began walking towards the house to share the moment with those who couldn’t join the rigmarole, but were intercepted by Mercy and Sky loping up to them, shifting back and giving the two men an expectant look.

“Hands,” Mercy said.

“I’m sorry?” asked Drix.

“What my oh-so-polite girlfriend is asking, is if we could see the rings?” clarified Sky, “Drix’s in particular. No offense but we’ve seen yours already.”

“It’s the least I could do for your help with this,” said Drix, holding his hand out, “even if we got headed off at the pass.”

“ _ Their  _ help?” said Charlie, joining the group along with Hazel, “you wanted to propose to Aaron and you didn’t come to the sibling who was already married?”

“I considered it, I honestly did,” Drix defended, “but you and Aaron are so close, I didn’t want to risk putting you in the position where you might have to lie to him.”

“Ok fine, I actually appreciate that,” conceded Charlie, before her brow furrowed and she looked straight at Mercy, “wait, is this why you asked where we got our rings?”

“Uh, yeah,” said Mercy, “why did you think I wanted to know?”

“Well, I kinda figured that  _ you _ were the one planning on proposing,” said Charlie, chuckling as Mercy turned red at the implication.”

“What? No... I mean… I want to… maybe… someday… but, jeez… uh,” Mercy stammered.

“What she’s trying to say,” Sky intervened, ”is that we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it, but we haven’t yet.”

“Thank you, exactly that,” said Mercy, “this is why I love you.”

“Ok, enough about theoretical proposals, you’re stealing their thunder,” said Hazel, “and unlike all of you, I wasn’t in on any of these plans and I haven’t seen either ring yet, so lemme see those shinies!” Aaron and Drix both laughed and gave Hazel their hand so she could have a closer look.

“Hey!” called Elsie from the deck, “you kids better get your butts up here! You’ve been engaged for five whole minutes and there are a whole bunch of parents up here are still waiting for hugs! I know I raised you better than that.”

“Well, I don’t know if you raised him better than that,” joked Drix, “but you certainly didn’t raise me.”

“The hell I didn’t. Even if I hadn’t been your principal, you’ve been part of my family since you were little, this engagement is just a formality” Elsie retorted, “now, I don’t care how long you’ve been graduated for, I will find a way to give you detention if you don’t get over here this instant.”

“Love,” said Aaron, “she’s serious. We should probably get over there.”

“Agreed,” said Drix, nodding emphatically, “let’s put in an appearance, I want to show off my new fiancé.”

Aaron shivered pleasantly at the word, he was so happy right now. Wrapping an arm around Hendrix, he kissed him on the cheek and the two made their way towards the house to share in the celebration with their family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was kinda a neat one to write. I spent far too long looking at pictures of engagement rings online, trying to come up with combinations that would suit the two of them, I'm probably gonna have to deal with wedding ads for a few weeks. Oh well, so worth it.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this one and as always, I'd love to hear what you think
> 
> -Juniper


	20. On the Up and Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Panthers are natural climbers, but that doesn't mean it's a skill that comes easy.

“Excuse me, what do you think you're doing?”

The panther kitten tilted his head back, staring curiously at his mother, completely upside-down.

“It appears he is exploring his climbing instinct,” drawled Carmilla, from where she'd leaned over the back of the couch, documenting the kitten with her phone.

“That much I can see,” replied Danny, “it's more the chosen location for said exploration I'm questioning.”

“What about it?” asked Carmilla, “I'll have you know up upholstery is an excellent surface to learn climbing on. Kitten claws stick to it like Velcro.”

Carmilla's observation was punctuated by the telltale 'tug tug tug RIP’ of Hendrix pulling a paw loose to take another step up the back of the couch. Danny winced at the sound.

“Yes, I've noticed. Complete with the lovely tearing effect when he lets go. He's going to completely shred this thing if he makes a habit of it.”

Carmilla tossed one of the couch cushions at Danny, who caught it handily. “Glass houses, Clifford.”

Danny looked at the cushion and winced. One side was covered in small nicks and tears, the product of a certain red wolf dreaming during a nap on the couch.

“Ok, fair point,” said Danny, “but wouldn't it be better if he learned this stuff on a tree or something?”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow at her, ”you want our one-year-old to go outside, wander out to the woods and try to climb a tree.”

“Alright, yeah. It sounds pretty stupid when you actually say it out loud like that.”

“Glad we're on the same page,” said Carmilla, her attention returning to recording her son.

“My point stands though, we'll probably have to buy a new couch.”

“That's fine,” said Carmilla, “we can afford it. Even if we could stop him from climbing the couch, which I doubt, I suspect the teething process for both panthers, and werewolves—” She pointed at Danny's stomach. “—will necessitate a few pieces of replacement furniture.”

Danny's hands instinctively moved to rest on her stomach. It was still showing no sign of the growing life within her, but the reflex to cradle it was the same

“Ok, I concede,” said Danny, “I guess we can consider the current furniture sacrificial.”

“Their contribution will be recognized in the new living room order.” Carmilla took one hand off the phone to salute in mock-seriousness.

“Heroes lost before their time.”

Drix, still set on his ascent, pulled another paw loose to try and heft himself a little bit higher, but instead, found his grip slipping and he dropped back to the carpet with a soft ‘plop’. 

For a moment, he just sat beside the couch, considering what had just happened. The two adults held their breath, waiting for the kitten's reaction.

They didn't have to wait long though. After a few seconds, the boy shifted; a toddler sitting where the kitten had been. He looked back and forth at his parents with a smile on his face before standing up and waddling around the room, his climbing seemingly forgotten.

“Well, I guess he considered that a success,” observed Danny.

“As well he should,” said Carmilla, putting her phone away, “eight inches is pretty darn good for never having tried before.”

“How far did you get on your first climb?”

“Uh…” Carmilla hesitated, “I don't remember.”

“Uh huh,” said Danny, obviously not believing a word, “come on, spill.”

“Fine, I made it three feet up a tree before I lost my grip and ended up half-buried, head first in a snow bank,” admitted Carmilla, “Mattie had to drag me out by my tail, I don't think I'd ever seen her laugh so hard.”

Danny couldn’t help but giggle at the mental image of a panther hindquarters sticking out of a snowdrift, flailing uselessly. “You and winter just do not mix, do you?”

“I prefer to be warm, is that so wrong?”

Danny walked around the front of the couch and sat down, pulling Carmilla into a cuddle. “Nothing wrong with that at all.”

“As lovely as this is,” said Carmilla, “one of us should probably play with him before he decides to try climbing the curtains.” She gestured over to where Drix was staring out the window, gently tugging on the curtains as he stood there.

Danny chuckled. “I hate it when you’re right.”

“Life must be a living hell for you then.”

She shoved Carmilla playfully before getting up to play with their son.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

x-x-x

“Um, Mom?”

Laura turned from her computer to where Charlie was standing in the doorway. “Yes, honey?”

“Drix is stuck.”

Alarm bells started going off in Laura’s head immediately. “What do you mean ‘stuck’?”

“He climbed up a tree,” Charlie explained, “and now he can’t get down.”

“What?!” cried Laura, “where?”

“In the backyard, on the edge of the woods.”

Laura was up like a shot, rushing through the house and out the back door. Across the lawn, she could see Hazel, Sky and Mercy, a small wolf pup, gathered around the base of one tree in particular, looking up into the branches. Rushing up to them, she craned her neck, trying to spot where they were looking. It only took a few seconds before a soft mewl drew her attention to the higher branches where the erstwhile panther cub could be spotted, clinging to a tree limb at least two storeys above the ground.

“Oh Drix,” she sighed, “how did you get yourself up there?”

“He climbed!” chimed in Sky, making Laura smirk slightly at the obvious answer.

Laura bit her lip as she gazed up, trying to figure out a solution. They had a ladder that would reach, but she doubted any of the branches that high would support the weight. The fire department was also out. The local authorities overlooked a lot of the odd goings on, but explaining the need to get a panther cub out of a tree would be an awkward proposition at best and draw dangerous attention to the pack at worst.

Deciding to call in reinforcements, she grabbed her phone from her pocket and called Carmilla.

“Hey Cupcake,” Carmilla said as she picked up, “you need me to grab something else while I’m out?”

“Actually Carm,” said Laura, “I really need you home post-haste. I’m afraid our son has climbed up a tree and now I can’t get him down.”

“I’ll be right there,” said Carmilla before hanging up.

Laura put her own phone away before concentrating on talking to Drix and keeping him calm while they waited for his Mama. It took nearly fifteen minutes before Laura heard the telltale engine noise of a car pulling into the driveway. No sooner did she hear the car door slam shut, than she found Carmilla at her side.

“Wow, he really got himself up there,” Carmilla said, a lilt of pride in her voice, “you okay up there bud?”

A miserable meow told both of them all they needed to know.

“Alright, I’ll go get him,” said Carmilla.

“Oh, you know how you’re— of course,” Laura said as Carmilla shifted and immediately began ascending the trunk of the tree.

Carmilla quickly reached the higher branches, twisting herself around the trunk to come at Drix from the side rather than underneath. Poor Drix was still clinging to the branch desperately, petrified at the task of descending. Even if they had gotten to him up here with the ladder, coaxing or prying him off the branch would have been time-consuming. Carmilla, however, decided to simply circumvent the issue as the reached over and got her jaws around the scruff of his neck. Instinctually, he relaxed as soon as she had a grip and she lifted him off the branch. With her payload secure, she began to gingerly pick her way back down the tree, being careful not to bash him against any branches as she went. It was slow going, but eventually she reached the ground again.

Laura breathed a sigh of relief once they had both made it back to earth. “Good work Carm. Is he okay?”

With Drix still firmly in her mouth, Carmilla’s response was simply eye contact with Laura before looking meaningfully at the house, before carrying Drix in that direction. Discerning her meaning and nodding, Laura jogged ahead to open the back door while the rest of the kids followed in Carmilla’s wake.

Once in the house, Carmilla took Drix up to his room where she deposited the shaking cub on his bed. Jumping up on the bed herself, she began grooming him gently. With each lick and nuzzle, the cub’s shivering grew less and less until it finally subsided. Minutes later, he was asleep between his mother’s paws. 

With a final nuzzle, Carmilla gently got up and shifted back before draping a blanket over his sleeping form. Satisfied he was comfortable, she joined Laura where she’d been watching from the doorway.

“I guess I need to give him some proper climbing lessons,” mused Carmilla.

“I’d say he’s got the climbing down pat,” Laura said, “it’s the unclimbing that needs work. Maybe a rule about not climbing out of reach.”

“That might be tricky given how drastically ‘reach’ changes depending on who’s home,” joked Carmilla, earning a good natured nudge from Laura, “but yeah, that seems wise until I can show him how to get himself down.”

“Alright, we’ll talk to him about it when he gets up,“ said Laura, “thanks again for coming back so quick.”

“I would do it again in a heartbeat for any of them, you know that.” 

“I do, though you know you’re probably going to be on call to get him down now that he knows he can get up there.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

x-x-x

Danny rushed through the undergrowth. Her quarry was somewhere nearby, she could smell it. However, no matter how close her nose said she was, he still eluded her.

A thump to her right drew her to a stop as she scanned the woods, trying to find the source of the noise. The smell of her target was everywhere. She should be right on top of him, that or—

A gentle grumble came from straight above her as a jet black tail descended into her vision, booping her on the nose. Danny looked up to see Drix, lounging on a low tree branch looking down at her smugly. If he'd been able to grin, she almost would've expected him to break into a verse about momeraths and jabberwocks.

Shifting back, she put her hands on her hips and glared at him. “Don't look so smug, you are totally cheating by hiding up there.”

Drix folded his his ears back and yowled softly in protest.

“Don’t give me that, you were cheating and you know it.”

Drix finally shifted himself, remaining seated upon the branch, his legs swinging casually. “How is this cheating? You hunt, I try to get away. I’d say I got away pretty effectively.”

“You went up a tree.”

“And?”

“You don’t go up trees.”

“My current position suggests otherwise.”

Danny facepalmed. “I mean you’re not supposed to go up trees.”

“Says who? I don’t recall anyone mentioning this before,” rebutted Drix, a self-satisfied grin on his face.

Danny didn’t know whether she wanted to smack him or hug him; right now he reminded her so much of his Mama. “Well… no-one, I guess. But wolves can’t climb trees, I can’t follow you up there.”

“So, does Mama stay on the ground for you to sniff out?”

Danny narrowed her eyes at him. They both already knew the answer to the question. “No, she actually goes even higher so I lose her scent… but she wasn’t raised in the pack. You should know better.”

“You’re right. I really should know to stay in the low branches so my scent is still around to give you a fair chance.”

“Exactly! And that… is… exactly what you did,” Danny admitted, losing all her steam.

Drix chuckled, swinging down to the ground. “Come on, let’s head home. I’m hungry.”

“Fine, but don’t think we’re done with this mister.”

“Yes Mom,” chuckled Drix, rolling his eyes.

The two walked in silence, enjoying the tranquility of the woods during the short walk back to the house. Soon enough, they were walking through the back door, Drix making a beeline to the fridge for a cup of blood.

“Welcome back,” greeted Laura, wrapping Danny in a hug, “did you two have fun?”

“We did,” said Danny, “right up until your son over here cheated.” She leveled a mock glare at him.

Drix chuckled and shook his head, but otherwise didn’t respond.

“Cheated?” asked Laura, a curious smile on her face, “how?”

“He went up a tree!”

“Like Carm?”

“Yes! Well… no, not as high, but still.”

“Did you say he couldn’t go up a tree?”

“No… but I shouldn’t have to. It’s like an unwritten rule.”

“Since when?” interrupted Mercy, walking in from the living room.

“Well, since wolves can’t climb trees.”

“So?” said Mercy, “we’re not wolves. We’re _were_ wolves. Do you know what I do when Drix goes up a tree when we play? I shift back and go right up after him.”

“It’s true, she’s like a damn monkey,” agreed Drix, a proud smile on his face, “she catches me most of the time.”

Danny’s mouth worked soundlessly, trying to form another argument, but nothing came to mind.

“Sorry sweetie,” consoled Laura, giving her a squeeze, “you’ve been outvoted.”

“Damn.” Danny chuckled. “Alright, I concede. But just you wait, this means I’ll be ready for you next time.”

Drix just grinned back at her.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”


	21. Rolling Out the Orange Carpet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie and Hazel decide to try their hand at hosting the trick or treaters.

Carmilla was just sliding a casserole into the oven when a knock came from the front door, announcing visitors.

“Come in!” she yelled as she closed the oven door and turned her attention to the ingredients that, with luck, would become a salad.

“Hi Mama,” said Charlie, walking into the room carrying a pie dish, followed closely by her fiancé.

“Hey Charlie Bear,” said Carmilla, wiping her hands on a tea towel before wrapping her daughter into a hug.

Charlie returned the hug with a chuckle, before pulling away and placing the pie on the counter for later as Carmilla moved to hug Hazel.

“Mama, you act like you haven’t seen us in months. We were hanging out here just the other day.”

“I know,” said Carmilla, a touch defiantly, “you’ve only been moved out for a couple months. It feels so weird to not have you home.”

“Just wait, soon enough Merc—”

“Nope, can’t hear you,” cried Carmilla, covering her ears, “I am just so busy over here making salad.” She quickly walked back over to where she had the veggies ready and began chopping very loudly.

“Alright, alright,” Hazel cautioned, “we won’t say anything, just please be careful. I know you can heal but I think chopping your finger off would still be pretty darn painful.”

Carmilla paused, considering the advice. After a moment, she shrugged and began chopping with a little more control.

“Thanks Mama. Now, is there anything that we can help with?”

“Nope. I’m doing the last bit. Everything else is cooking or ready.”

“And even if she wasn’t, she’ll chase you out of the kitchen if you try,” said Danny, walking in from the living room, followed closely by Laura.

Hazel glanced over into the living room where the TV was still turned on to some generic home improvement show. “Case in point?”

“Yep. For the sake of your sanity, don’t test her.”

“Noted.”

“Are Drix and Aaron joining us?” asked Charlie.

“Yeah,” said Danny, checking the time, “should be here in a few minutes.”

“Great. Say, while we’ve got you guys to ourselves, could we ask you a favour?”

“If you’re asking permission to get married, you’re a bit late on that,” joked Danny.

Both women rolled their eyes in near perfect sync.

“No,” Charlie scoffed, “we were wondering if we could borrow your house.”

“The front of it, to be specific,” added Hazel.

“I dunno,” said Laura, “I don’t think it’d fit into your apartment.”

“Har har, you’re a regular Laurel and Hardy,” quipped Hazel, “babe, were they this bad before you moved out?”

“No, they must be saving it up when we’re not around,” said Charlie, “once Mercy moves out, it’ll probably be enough to cause mental trauma.”

“La la la la la!!! I can’t hear anything!” yelled Carmilla.

“Sorry Mama,” Charlie apologized, “so, we really want to host trick or treaters this year but—”

“—but our apartment building doesn’t have many kids,” Hazel continued, “and we can’t really do much decorating out in the hallway so—”

“—so we’re hoping you’d let us decorate your place and handle the trick or treaters this year,” finished Charlie.

Danny looked impressed. “Well, I certainly like the idea. It’d be nice to do halloween night out without feeling guilty about not handing out candy.

“I’m in,” agreed Laura, “Carm?”

“Hmmm…” she mused, “spend the best party night of the year out on the town with my wives or stay home and deal with other people’s demon spawn ringing the doorbell every two minutes. Decisions, decisions.”

“You’ve successfully raised three children,” Danny pointed out, “it’s a little late to start pretending you don’t like kids.”

“That’s different,” Carmilla argued, “those kids aren’t mine.”

“Some would be from the pack.”

“Some, not all.”

“If we can get back on track,” interrupted Charlie, “does this mean we can go ahead with this?”

Laura laughed, “yes, yes it does. We’ll find something fun to attend so we’re out of your hair.”

“Mercy might still be around,” said Danny, “though I think she said something about she and Sky going to some party for Sky’s dance company. Apparently, Rodney has been bugging them to go for weeks.”

“If she’s around, the more the merrier,” said Hazel, “but I know Sky wants to go to this thing, this might be the nudge needed to get Merc to go.”

“Excellent, it’s settled then,” said Carmilla, placing a somewhat haggard looking salad on the table, “you get to play house here and everyone else gets a night on the town.”

“Perfect,” said Charlie, “I think this is gonna be fun.”

x-x-x

“Hey, where did you want these corn stalks?” asked Drix, walking up to Charlie, who was focussing on spreading a layer of leaves over the front lawn.

“You can lash those to the railings either side of the front steps,” she directed, “I want a bit of a corridor effect.”

“Done and done.”

Charlie returned her attention to the leaves, wanting an even spread to obscure the grass completely. Fortunately, getting enough leaves had been the easy part. The woods had more than enough to spare for the project.

“Hey Charlie, I think there’s something wrong with that fog formula Hazel made,” said Aaron from behind her.

Charlie turned to look at him. “What makes you say—” Her eyes fell upon the skeletal hand protruding from the end of his coat sleeve. She smirked before looking him in the eyes “See, it’s working fine. Not a spot of flesh on there. Just douse yourself in the rest of it and we’ll set you up by the door before sundown.”

Aaron laughed. “So long as it’s tasteful. I refuse to have my corpse desecrated if it’s not used stylishly.”

“Oh well, if you’re going to be picky.”

“I am. Now, I assume the skeleton parts are for the ‘freshly filled graves’ over there,” he said, gesturing.

“Yeah, if you could make them look like they’re trying to claw their way out, it should make for a nice effect.”

“I'm surprised you don't have some sort of jump scare contraption set up. “

“We thought about it. If this had been for a Halloween party for people our age, it would have been a no brainer, but we really don't want to be scaring little kids. We'll stick with keeping it spooky.”

Aaron set about arranging the bones as Charlie raked the last of the leaves into place. Giving her handiwork a satisfied nod, she headed up to the deck where Hazel was sitting cross-legged amongst a collection of power cords.

“Hey Haze, we're just about done with the decorations, you ready to add in the highlights?”

“Oh yeah.” Hazel grinned maniacally. “I've got orange rope lights for the path, red floods for the decorations on the lawn, some ‘glowing eyes’ in the bushes, a spooky soundtrack and, of course, the fog machine.”

“Excellent, all we need now are the jack-o-lanterns and we'll be set.”

“Mercy stuck her head out a few minutes ago and said that your Moms are just about done with them.”

“Does that include cleaning up from their little pumpkin guts fight?” Charlie smirked.

Hazel chuckled. “She didn't say.”

“Did you get a glance of the front entrance?”

“No. I tried, but she only opened the door a crack. I caught a hint of cobwebs, but that's it.”

“Damn, well we'll find out what she and your sister did with it soon enough.”

“That we will, now let's get all these lights set up and then we can go make sure our costumes are ready for tomorrow.”

x-x-x

“Wow Mama,” exclaimed Charlie, “your outfit looks great.”

Carmilla turned around from where she’d been adjusting her fascinator in the hallway mirror. She was dressed in a black 1940’s style cocktail dress complete with victory curls.

“Thanks Charlie, you remember when the limo is supposed to arrive?”

“I think Mom said about a quarter past three, after it picks up Laf and Perry,” said Charlie, “still seems a bit early to be leaving.”

“We want to leave plenty of time to get to New York, if we’re early for dinner we’ll get drinks somewhere,” said Danny, strolling down the stairs in a pinstripe zoot suit, “how do I look?”

Carmilla gawked at Danny for a moment. “Well, terrible news Charlie. I'm afraid we won't be going anywhere, I'm afraid we have urgent business upstairs. On the bright side, there'll be some extra moans for your spooky soundtrack. “

“Ew, Mama!” exclaimed Charlie, swatting Carmilla lightly.

“None of that now,” said Laura, from up the stairs, “we have reservations. Besides, we’ve got a swanky hotel room booked for tonight that we can use for… business.” Laura’s last word was punctuated by the loud click of her heels on the floor, drawing the attention of the room.

“Really, Cupcake?” Carmilla said, looking over Laura’s blue skirt suit and red fedora.

“What?” defended Laura, “you do the 40’s your way, I’ll do it mine.”

“Well, I think you look great,” said Danny, wrapping an arm around her.

Carmilla opened her mouth to protest but a knock and the sound of the front door opening interrupted her.

“Limo delivery!” called Hazel as she bounded into the house, “they gave me a lift over.”

“Huh, they’re early,” noted Laura, “we all ready?”

“I think so, let’s get going,” said Carmilla.

“Alright. You guys have fun tonight,” said Danny, “and remember, if you burn the house down—”

“Make sure it looks like an accident so we can get the insurance, I know,“ Charlie joked.

A quick series of goodbyes later, the parents were in the limousine and on their way.

“Alright, we have a couple of hours before the little little kids start their rounds,” said Hazel, “let’s go over the checklist. The decorations are up?”

“Yep. Everything’s up and ready.”

“The speakers and fog machine?”

“Tested and ready to go. We just need to flick a switch for everything outside and light a few candles in the front entrance.”

“Mercy and Sky nailed that completely, by the way. It looked like I was walking into the Adams Family estate.”

“It looks amazing; we owe them a tray of cookies for their help. Where are they anyways?”

“They’re staging from our place. Rodney’s picking them up from there,” said Hazel, “back to the checklist, are our costumes ready?”

“They’re up in my old room, and the makeup is in the bathroom. We can start getting ready in about an hour.”

“Excellent, I guess that all that’s left is to put out the candy.”

“Good idea,” Charlie agreed, “I’ll go get a bowl to dump it into while you go grab it.”

“Sure yeah, where is it?”

Charlie froze. “What do you mean? You didn’t bring it?”

“No… I thought you had gotten it.”

The two simply stood there, staring at each other in silence.

x-x-x

“You have got to be kidding me,” groaned Charlie, looking over the bare shelves at the grocery store.

“I’m not really sure what you were expecting,” said Hazel, “it is halloween night after all.”

“I know, I know,” admitted Charlie, “I just don’t know how we could’ve forgotten the candy. It’s the most basic part of the entire operation.”

“We just got so caught up in making the entire thing special that we overlooked the necessities, it happens,” said Hazel, wrapping an arm around Charlie, “now, they aren’t completely out of everything, we still have some options.”

“Such as?”

“Such as…” Hazel glanced around the shelves, “raisins!”

“Pass.”

“Candy corn.”

Charlie just made a face, drawing a sigh from Hazel.

“Halloween bottled water?”

“Ok, now you’re just trying to get my moms’ house egged.”

“Well, we don’t have much else to pick from, unless…”

“unless what?”

“Well, it’d be kinda expensive… but the kids would love us.”

“Go on…”

x-x-x

“TRICK OR TREAT!”

Charlie, dressed as Jack Skellington, smiled broadly at the small gaggle of kids on the porch.

“Alright, now who do we have here. One for the princess, one for Superman, one for the cat, one for the little pumpkin and one for Batgirl.”

“I’m Batman!” the child protested, in the cutest gravelly voice Charlie had ever heard.

“Oh, of course you are. How silly of me,” she said, smiling even more broadly.

“Wow! Are these full size?” exclaimed the cat, “you’re the best!”

“Now, what do we say to the nice lady?” prompted the woman escorting them.

“Thank you!” the kids chorused before retreating down the steps.

“Hey,” said Charlie, grabbing the woman’s attention, “here.” She tossed another chocolate bar to the woman. “Gotta keep your energy up.”

“Thanks,” she replied, “it’s a fun night, but a tiring one.”

“It looks that way. Though I really can’t wait to have some of my own to cart around.”

“It’s worth the wait.” The woman smiled at her before running after the kids who had moved on ahead, heedless of their guardian.

Charlie stood in the doorway watching them for a moment before going back inside and returning to the couch where Hazel, dressed up as Sally, resumed the slasher movie they had been watching.

“How’s it looking out there?”

“It seems like it’s petering out,” replied Charlie, “we’ll probably get two or three more, but for the most part, I think we’re done.”

“Not bad for an evening. How many do you think we got?”

“Judging on the number of these left?” Charlie mused, shaking the bowl, “I’d say around seventy-five or eighty, give or take.”

“Not bad at all, far better than the dozen or so we would’ve gotten at home.”

“So, what now? We didn’t plan the after part.”

“Well, for now we cheer on the chainsaw wielding maniac while we wait for any stragglers,” said Hazel, “and then once the trick-or-treaters are done and we’ve turned off and put out everything we need to, we go meet up with Drix and Aaron for a night out.”

“I like it when you have things figured out.”

“What can I say, I have a knack for details…  _ most _ details,” she added, cutting off Charlie’s snarky remark, “now, let’s watch the movie. I think this idiot is about to wander into the room where the killer is waiting.”

The doorbell rang, indicating another set of kids at the door.

Hazel chuckled, pausing the movie. “Or we’ll just have to wait. I’ll get these ones” Hazel smiled before grabbing the candy bowl.

“I’ll come with you. I like seeing the kids.”

“Making you think of the future?”

“Absolutely. And that is one door I can’t wait to pass through with you.”

“Me neither,” Hazel said, grasping the door handle and pulling it open.

“TRICK OR TREAT!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,
> 
> Decided to post a day early this week so I could get this on Halloween itself.
> 
> For those who are lucky enough to live in places where they aren't doing this: yes, little Halloween themed bottled waters for trick or treats is a thing, that exists. I just couldn't leave something like that alone.
> 
> As always, lemme know what you think.  
> -Juniper


	22. Duly Noted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few little words can mean so much.

Danny turned over in her bed, barely awake, instinctively grasping for her wives. Her hand, however, slapped down against empty sheets. Disturbed by the absence of someone to snuggle, Danny slowly woke up.

Drowsily, she glanced around the bedroom. The shades were drawn but there was sunlight streaming through the cracks; it was probably mid-morning, perhaps a bit later. She didn’t have to be anywhere, but given her wakefulness, and deplorable lack of bedmates, Danny decided that now was a good a time as any to get up and start her day.

She sat up in bed and stretched. She was about to throw off the covers when she noticed a bit of paper stuck on the pillows beside her. Turning, she took a closer look, finding Carmilla’s intricate cursive handwriting.

> _ Good Morning Beautiful _  
>  _ I love you _

Danny smiled at the note. It was a simple gesture, but one that spoke volumes to her. She picked the note up, pressing it to her lips before getting up. Placing the paper down on the bedside stand, she got up and turned towards the bathroom. She’d only taken a couple of steps before turning back and retrieving the note. It seemed like a nice thing to keep with her.

Stashing the slip of paper temporarily on the bathroom counter, Danny went about her morning routine until she noticed another slip of paper, this time stuck to the top of the mirror. Reaching up, she pulled this new note down, this time finding Laura’s neat printing.

> **Look in that mirror, is that not the most gorgeous person you’ve ever seen?**  
>  **I love you**

Danny did, in fact, look at herself in the mirror. Her reflection looked back with an enormous smile painted across her face. Finding herself tearing up a little, she looked away and wondered, how had she gotten so lucky?

She looked back up to where the note had been hanging. It was well within her reach, but not really an easily accessible point for either Carmilla or Laura. Glancing around the counter for clues, she giggled a little at the telltale handprint on the glass where someone had kept their balance against the mirror as they’d climbed up.

Placing the new note with the first, Danny hopped into the shower. As she stood under the spray and began washing up, she thought about the notes and what the occasion might be for them. It wasn't her birthday nor was their anniversary any time soon. They hadn't gotten into a fight and life had been pretty good to them all lately, so she didn't really need cheering up.

She continued to puzzle over it as she stepped out and dried off but, despite her efforts, couldn't think of a single thing the notes might be for. Picking the notes up as she returned to the bedroom, quickly dressing before heading downstairs in search of breakfast.

“Good morning,” greeted Mercy from the kitchen table as Danny came into the kitchen.

“Morning Sweetheart,” Danny said as she went to pour herself a cup of coffee, pleased to find plenty left and still hot in the carafe, “how are you today?”

“It's Saturday and I wasn't woken up by an alarm; I'm doing pretty darn good.”

“That's great. This is a rather civilized way to start the day.” Danny chuckled. “Have you seen either of your mothers this morning?”

“Briefly. They said they were going to let you sleep in and run some errands.”

Danny had to raise an eyebrow at that. The three of them usually all did the weekend errands together so they could spend time with each other. Danny smirked, her wives were up to something and she couldn't wait to find out what.

She fixed herself a bowl of yogurt and fruit and went to the table to join Mercy. As she walked up, however, she found another note staring her in the face, this time stuck to her daughter's back. She peeled the sticky paper from her shirt, getting Mercy's attention.

“Wait, what is that? Charlie didn't put a ‘kick me’ sign on me, did she?”

“No.” Danny smiled as she read the note.

> _ A lovely daughter, like her lovely mother. _  
>  **The amazing mother of all our kids**  
>  **We love you**

Danny caught herself tearing up again as Mercy got up to see what the note was.

“How did they get— okay, that is just incredibly sweet… a bit nauseating if I'm honest,” Mercy teased.

“Oh hush you.”

“So, what did they do?” asked Mercy, a wry smirk crossing her face.

“Nothing,” defended Danny, “at least, nothing I'm aware of yet.”

The two women laughed as Danny added the note to the small pile she now had forming on the table beside her and started eating breakfast.

“Hey Mom,” asked Mercy once they had finished and were cleaning up, “could I borrow the truck? Sky and I wanted to head into town for a bit today.”

“Sure, go for it. Keys are on the hook. Make sure you call if you're not going to be home for dinner.”

“Sure Mom. Though, if these little things are any indication,  _ you _ probably won't be home for dinner and I should probably see if I can sleep over at Sky's.”

Danny started to protest before she thought better of it. “That's… not a bad idea. Just text one of us so we know where you are.”

“Can do, will do!” chirped Mercy as she headed out of the room.

Danny stood in the middle of the kitchen for a moment, feeling somewhat at loose ends. After all the notes, she wished very much that her wives were here so she could share how much she loved them as well. As that wasn't an option, she decided her best course of action was to take care of some chores since the two of them were nice enough to handle the errands.

She started to head back upstairs when Mercy walked back into the room, obviously trying to hold in her laughter. “Hey Mom? I found another one on the steering wheel.” Mercy held out the small piece of paper, which Danny readily accepted and read.

> **If you drive a truck as well as you drive me to distraction, you'll be fine. But still, drive safe.**  
>  **I love you.**

“We're gonna be finding these notes for weeks, aren't we?” asked Mercy.

“I don’t know, maybe?”

Mercy looked mildly unimpressed. “I swear if I find a note laced with innuendo under the toilet seat or something, I’m not coming back from Sky’s for a month.”

Danny laughed, tucking the gathered notes into her back pocket. “I’ll keep that in mind. Hey, I’m going to do some laundry. Anything you want sent through?”

“Nah,” said Mercy, “I did mine a couple days ago after school, so I’m set for now.

“Alright. Have fun with Sky, for however long that is.”

“I will,” said Mercy, heading back to the garage.

Danny jogged back up the stairs to her room, making a beeline for the laundry hamper in the closet. Dragging it from its spot to the bathroom door, she lifted the lid, intent on adding the bath towels to her load. She paused, however, to pick up the note that had been placed on top of the dirty laundry.

> _ Are you seriously going to do laundry? It’s a day off, relax. _  
>  _ I love you. _

“Sorry Carm,” said Danny softly, tucking the note into her pocket with the rest, “‘fraid you’re just gonna have to suffer through having clean clothes.” 

She grabbed the towels and tossed them into the hamper before hefting the basket and hauling it from the room. Lugging it down the stairs, she managed to get it into the laundry room without much trouble. She quickly sorted the contents and tossed the first load into the washer. However, when she popped open the detergent door, another note was stuck inside waiting for her.

> _ What did I just say? Seriously, relax. I’ll deal with the laundry later. _  
>  _ I love you. _

Danny rolled her eyes and pocketed the note, filling the now empty tray with detergent and turning the machine on. As she turned to leave the room, she found her curiosity piqued and inspected the dryer. Her search was quickly rewarded with a note that fell from the door when it opened. Grinning victoriously, she unfolded to note.

> _ I owe Laura $20 now. Serves me right for betting against you being you I guess. _  
>  _ I love you. _

Danny laughed, adding the note to the rest. Deciding to somewhat heed Carmilla's advice, she spent the rest of the morning lounging on the couch, reading between loads of laundry.

The next few hours passed quietly as she alternated between reading and folding clothes. She was about to get up to grab the last load from the dryer when the doorbell rang.

Opening the door, she was greeted by a man holding a bouquet of orange tulips, the petals the same vibrant hue as her hair.

“Hello, I have a delivery here for a—” He read the card in his hand. “—Xena the Beanstalk?”

Danny sighed and chuckled softly, shaking her head and accepting the bouquet. “Yep, those are for me. Thank you.”

“Not a problem. I try my best to be prompt. Have a good day!”

“You too,” she replied, shutting the door. Taking the bouquet into the kitchen, she was completely unsurprised to find a small sheet of paper, with two familiar handwritings, hiding amongst the blooms.

> **Saw these and thought of how much we missed you. Sending them was totally Carm’s idea**  
>  _ Lies. I just mentioned that you'd like them _  
>  **Same/diff. It's not like she put up a fight.**  
>  _ True. We just already have something of the colour that is even more beautiful. _  
>  **Agreed.**  
>  _ We love you. _

This was getting ridiculous. As much as she loved these wonderful little gestures, what she really wanted was her wives to be here with her so she could return the affection, and then some. She settled for a quick text of ‘thank you for the flowers, wish you were home right now <3’ before returning to the last load of laundry, hoping it would last long enough to keep her from going stir crazy.

Her prayers were answered, just as she was rolling the last socks, by the telltale hum of the garage door opening. She gathered the folded laundry and headed up the stairs to put the last of it away. 

As she started back downstairs, she heard Carmilla and Laura come in.

“Maybe she's gone out, the truck is certainly gone,” said Carmilla.

“I don't think so. She texted us less than an hour ago about the flowers and… ha! She did the laundry. Pay up Karnstein.”

“Dammit. I was hoping she’d mow the lawn. I thought the note I left on the mower was particularly poetic.”

“Danny hates dealing with the killdeer, she’d never mow the lawn if it wasn’t necessary. She leaves it to Drix, he loves chasing those little feather balls around.”

Danny kept herself hidden in the stairwell as they came into the kitchen and began putting away groceries.

“Did you bring in the—”

“Yeah, it’s on the counter beside the blood.”

“Good, I really hope she likes it.”

“Me too, I—”

Laura gave a squeak as Danny swept out of the stairwell and scooped her up when she wandered too close. With her wife securely in hand, Danny began peppering her face with kisses as Laura squealed happily, trying to squirm loose.

“Ack! Carm, help!”

“This—” Kiss. ”—is what—” Kiss. “—you get—” Kiss. “—for leaving me—” Kiss. “—home alone—” Kiss. “—with those sappy notes—” Kiss. “—all day.”

“Sorry cupcake, you’re on your own.”

“Oh no she isn’t,” said Danny, focusing on Carmilla, “don’t think I haven’t forgotten about you.”

Danny let Laura go before heading in Carmilla’s direction. The vampire played at making a half-hearted attempt to get away, but she wasn’t really all that determined to escape. Very soon, she had a pair of arms wrapped around her waist and a pair of lips kissing their way down her neck. She tilted her head to give Danny better access as her hand reached up and tangled itself in Danny’s hair.

Laura coughed lightly to get their attention. “As much fun as pursuing this would be, we have dinner reservations.”

Danny raised her head, drawing a disappointed whine from Carmilla. “Dinner reservations?”

“Yep, at that mexican place you like.”

“Alright, what is going on? Did you burn down my parents’ house or something?”

Carmilla chuckled. “I told you she’d be suspicious Cupcake. There’s nothing wrong, no occasion either, before you ask.”

“We just wanted to do something special for you today. No real reason.”

“Then why spend the day out?”

“Simple,” interjected Carmilla, walking over to the counter and grabbing a large bag, far fancier than the grocery bags that surrounded it, “we needed to go out by ourselves so we could pick this up for you.” With a dramatic flourish, she presented the bag to Danny.

Danny reached into the bag and withdrew an intricate, brown leather messenger bag with ‘DL’ embossed on the outside in intricate script. She turned the bag over in her hands, admiring the workmanship, feeling slightly awed by the gift.

“I don’t know what to say. Thank you.”

“Look inside!” said Laura, clearly excited.

Danny undid the buckle, opening the main flap, and looked into the main compartment. The interior was as much a spectacle of function as the exterior had been of form. A collection of pocket and compartments lined the inside, ready for the plethora of tools and papers that would soon fill it. At the moment, however, the only thing contained within the bag was a single note.

Danny smiled at her wives, who’d moved to stand arm in arm as they watched her withdraw the note from the bag.

> **Here’s a smart, professional bag for our smart professional college professor.**  
>  _ We know you love that backpack, but it has got to go. _  
>  **If only to keep your marked assignments dry, you work hard on those.**  
>  _ You’re amazing in any case. Those kids are lucky to have you. _  
>  **And so are we.**  
>  _ Took the words right out of my… pen. _  
>  _ We love you. _

Danny put the bag and note down and drew Laura and Carmilla both into a tight hug.

“I love you both so much,” she said, tears beginning to flow, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you both.”

“Well, it must’ve been something good,” said Carmilla, “cause we got you too.”

They remained embraced for several minutes before Laura broke the silence.

“Okay, as much as I don’t want to stop this, we still have dinner to get to.”

With a groan, the three of them broke apart and ran upstairs to get dressed. It only took a few minutes before they were ready to go and out the door.

x-x-x

The mood in the car was electric. The restaurant had given them a quiet table and they were able to enjoy a good meal filled with soft touches and loving company. All throughout dinner, the tension rose between them until it was all they could do to politely decline dessert, pay the bill and get out the door. They managed to behave on the ride home, if only to keep Laura from veering off the road until they could safely reach their driveway

Returning home. they burst through the front door, sharing hurried kisses and caresses, trying best not to leave too much of a crime scene should their kids return early the next day.

“Can you two take care of putting away the leftovers?” asked Danny, “there’s something I need to deal with upstairs.”

“Of course,” said Laura, taking the doggy bag to the fridge as Danny slipped up the stairs, leaving them in the kitchen.

“Well, I think today went rather well,” said Carmilla, pulling Laura close, kissing the tip of her nose.

“Very well,” agreed Laura, “though tomorrow, we’ll have to figure out which ones she missed or we’ll never hear the end of it from the kids.”

“Yeah, but let’s not keep our lovely wife waiting too long,” purred Carmilla, “there are still a few hours left in the day for making her feel special.”

“Oh yeah. Time’s a wastin,” Laura joked, taking Carmilla’s hand and leading her up the stairs. When they reached their room, however, they found the door shut and a piece of paper stuck on it, waiting for them.

> **_You two are the most amazing wives a woman could ask for. You’ve both spent so much time and effort just to make me smile. You are the most beautiful people in existence and I can’t imagine living life without you._ **  
>  **_Now hurry up and get in here so I can show you how much I appreciate you._ **  
>  **_I love you._ **

The two women shared a smile.

“When did she have time to do that?” wondered Laura.

“I’m not sure, but do you really want to stand out here and figure it out?”

Laura looked at the note, then the door and then back to Carmilla. “No, no I don’t.”

Note in hand, they quickly entered the room with a giggle and shut the door behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was this too sappy? This might have been too sappy. Anyone want a pancake?
> 
> Lemme know what you think.
> 
> -Juniper


	23. A Step Back from the Masonry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Sky catches Mercy overworking herself, she decides to enlist some help before it gets worse.

“Argh!”

A cluster of piano notes sounded through the apartment. Sky, nose to knee in the middle of the living room floor, cracked an eye open and chuckled before resuming her concentration and reaching down her other leg, waiting for the gentle, repetitive tones to resume.

As silence continued to reign, she sat back up, her brow furrowing as she looked over her shoulder towards the ajar door of the study. Curious, she got up and walked over to investigate.

Looking in, she saw Mercy hunched over on the piano bench, her head and hands all resting on the keys. The floor was littered with crumpled up balls of paper. On the music stand, the pad of manuscript was decorated with a handful of scribbled musical notes followed by a sad face taking up most of the page.

Sky smiled sadly, walking over to rub her girlfriend’s back. “Having trouble?”

Mercy rolled her head over, playing another cluster of keys. “I cannot get this started,” she groaned, “I have the hook in my head, but I can’t think of an intro.”

“Four chord structure?”

Mercy moved her eyes to make eye contact and glare up Sky. “You’re trying to help… and I appreciate that… but that honestly just hurt.”

“Aw, sweetie,” said Sky, continuing to rub circles on her back, “can I help at all?”

“I don’t think so,” Mercy muttered, “I’ve been throwing myself at this for hours and nothing sounds right.”

“Come on,” soothed Sky, coaxing Mercy off the piano bench, “I think you need a break. You can come back at this later with fresh eyes… ears… whatever.”

“Nooo…” protested Mercy weakly, reaching pathetically for the keyboard as Sky led her away, “I’m so close, I can feel it.”

“I don’t think laying your face on the keys is really encouraging the creative process,” said Sky, biting back a laugh, “though the piano key shaped impressions on your face are somewhat striking.”

“No, it helps,” murmured Mercy, “the piano was telling me its secrets.”

“Uh, babe?” asked Sky, “when was the last time you ate?”

“Um…” Mercy hesitated, drawing a disappointed frown Sky.

“Seriously? Don’t tell me you haven’t eaten since breakfast. You’ve been working through lunch too much lately.”

“Well… about that…” she mumbled, “I may have missed breakfast too.”

“You’re kidding,” said Sky, clearly irritated.

“I woke up with that amazing hook in my head,” Mercy defended herself, “I had to get it down before it was too late, then at that point it seemed only natural to try and get the rest of the song out.”

“Mercy!” exclaimed Sky, “I can’t believe you! It’s almost dinner time. No wonder you’ve hit a wall.”

“Ok fine,” said Mercy, “I’ll eat something, but then I need to get back to work.”

“No,” said Sky, “It’s bad enough you’ve made a habit skipping lunch, I can’t let you get into the habit of neglecting yourself completely; you’re going to overwork yourself. We’re going to have a proper dinner and then we’re spend the evening relaxing… or else.”

“Or else what?” scoffed Mercy, “you gonna tell my parents on me?”

“No…” said Sky calmly, “but…”

“But? Wha— No, I’m sorry. No, lets sit down! Relax! Let’s go out to dinner, my treat. It’ll be fun, just not—”

x-x-x

“Now, I know that it seems difficult when you get into a ‘groove’, but you really need to take the time to take care of yourself,” lectured Perry, adding a casserole of green beans to the growing feast on the table, “I mean, yes, the occasional missed meal is not going to kill you, but if you make too much of a habit of it, you'll wear yourself down.”

“I know, Aunt Perry,” Mercy admitted reluctantly as everyone took their seats around the table, “it just feels like time wasted when I'm on to something. Almost like if I look away, I'll lose it completely.”

“I know that feeling,” said Laf, “lemme tell you a story. Years and years ago, before any of you kids were born, just after we'd moved into this house…”

<-<-<

_ “Laf, sweetie. Can you grab my briefcase from the office?” asked Perry, lugging her suitcase down the stairs. _

_ “Got it, Perr,” they replied, “you got your boarding pass?” _

_ “It's loaded onto my phone and I've got a printed copy in my briefcase for backup.” _

_ “Good, one bad crash and it's ‘sorry, we can't let you board this flight’.” _

_ “I think that one time was because if the tray of live petri-dishes than boarding pass issues.” Perry paused, looking at them with a tight smile. “Oh, I'm gonna miss you, weirdo.” _

_ “I'll miss you too, even if it's just a week, my beautiful control freak.” _

_ With shining eyes, she wrapped her arms around their neck and brought her face to theirs, losing herself in their lips. After what felt like entirely too short a time, Lafontaine broke away, resting their forehead against hers. _

_ “As much as I hate myself for saying this, we need to get you to the airport or you're gonna miss your flight.” _

_ Perry sighed. “You’re right, as much as I’d love to drag you upstairs to continue this.” She stepped away from them, giving their butt a playful squeeze before grabbing her briefcase and carry on and scampering out the door.  _

_ They stood shock still for a moment, letting their brain reboot. “God I love her.” They grabbed the suitcase and rolled it out the door.” _

_ x-x-x _

_ Laf made their way down the stairs into their lab, snacking on an apple leftover from lunch. The last few days had been wonderfully productive. They’d fallen into relaxed routine of sleeping late and lounging the morning away before starting their work after lunch and going until they got hungry, usually about mid-evening.  _

_ Despite the sedate pace, they’d managed to get an enormous amount of data recorded and their samples were developing nicely. Now today, as a result, was something they were really anticipating; one of their key experiments was going to come to fruition. _

_ Throwing on their lab coat, they quickly gathered their notes before moving to grab their equipment. It took every shred of their patience to wait to have all their tools ready before they went to gather the samples that they had left growing since the day before. Satisfied that the lab was ready, they crossed the room, threw open the large incubator and and removed the rack of vials. With a grin, Laf brought the set of glassware to eye level to have a glance at the specimens within and saw… nothing. _

_ There was nothing growing in the glass vials. The growth substrate was still in the bottom, and the samples seemed properly seeded, but there was no growth, complete inertia. It made no sense. The sample could have grown with any number of different characteristics, that was the point of the experiment, but it should still have done something. It completely contradicted the data. _

_ Setting the sample vials aside, they grabbed their data sheets and began poring over them, trying to find where their method had gone wrong _

_ x-x-x _

_ “Laf?” _

_ Danny knocked as she opened the front door, trying to announce her entry into the house. Silence, however, was the only answer. Disconcerted, she made her way through the house, trying to find her scientist friend. _

_ “Lafontaine?” she tried again as she passed through the kitchen and up the stairs, “are you here?”  _

_ She’d made it up to their bedroom when a dull thud from somewhere below drew Danny’s attention. Slowly, she brought a hand up to cover her face. “Searching through an empty house, for my missing friend, about to investigate a mysterious sound. Guaranteed there is someone yelling at a screen right now, telling me to get out of the house.” With a huff, she balled up her fists and began making her way back downstairs. _

_ She made it to the kitchen when another thud drew her attention to the basement door. Scrunching up her face in annoyance, she strode forward and threw the door open. “Laf? If that’s you, I’m coming down. If that's a murderer waiting to jump out at me, you are getting such a mauling, I swear. _

_ Carefully, she made her way down the stairs into the laboratory, noticing a musty, earthy smell that was becoming stronger as she descended. Reaching the bottom of the stairs and entering the lab, she came upon Lafontaine, hunched over a table, scribbling away at something and muttering incoherently. _

_ “Laf?” offered Danny tentatively. _

_ They whipped around, staring back with bloodshot eyes, “Danny?” they said, a noticeable scratch to their voice, “what are you doing here?” _

_ “Looking for you. It’s been several days since we’ve seen you, so I came by to invite you over to dinner. How long have you been down here?” asked Danny, looking around the room. Sheets of paper covered every available surface, the floor included; the waste basket was full of presumably dry pens and a coffee encrusted mug seemed like it might be adhered to the counter behind Laf. Lafontaine themself had noticeable dark circles under their eyes, which were visibly glazed over, even with their attention towards Danny. “Laf?” _

_ Lafontaine snapped back to reality. “Wha? Oh, sorry. Uh… what time is— wait, what day is it?” _

_ Danny goggled at them. “It’s thursday.” _

_ “Oh, then three days… give or take.” _

_ “Three days!” exclaimed Danny, “please tell me you’ve eaten in that time.” _

_ “Does coffee count?” _

_ “No.” _

_ “Umm…” _

_ “Well, then have you at least gotten some sleep?” _

_ “I got a couple hours here and there, at the counter here.” _

_ Danny stood silently for a moment, simply staring at their friend, before clapping their hands together and stepping up to ease them out of their chair. “Okay, time to come back to reality. You are coming back to our house for a proper meal and then you are going to bed. However, first you are going to go take a shower and change, because I just realized that smell is seventy-two hours of obsessed scientist body odor.” _

_ Laf’s eyes went wide as their face went cherry red. “Yes, that is a thing that needs to be done. I’m so sorry.” _

_ “It’s cool Laf,” said Danny, “go get ready, I’ll wait for you.” _

_ “Thanks Dan’.” _

>->->

Mercy stared at Laf, a look of sheer horror on her face.

“That’s about what Perry looked like when she got home and I told her what happened,” Laf observed with a chuckle.

“But three days… without food… or sleep… or bathing…” said Mercy, in shock.

“May it forever stand as a warning,” said Sky.

“It’s a lesson taken to heart, believe me,” said Mercy, “I promise to never get that swept away in my work.”

“Well, I’m glad you get why it’s important,” said Perry as she began to clear dishes, everyone else getting up to help, “if only because once you get into that sort of state, you start to miss the obvious.”

“I can get that,” agreed Mercy, “so, what was the incredibly obvious thing did you find once you went back?”

“Actually, I wasn’t the one who found it,” admitted Laf, “I decided to take some time out of the lab to recover to keep from burning out. It was actually Perr who found it.”

“What? How?”

“Well,” explained Perry, “after they told me, I insisted on going down and cleaning the lab for the sake of their health.”

“Laf, you don’t let anyone touch anything down there,” said Mercy, “and you let Aunt Perry do a full cleaning?”

“I didn’t have anything nearly as dangerous down there back then as I keep around now,” said Laf, “plus, you should know by now that your Aunt Perr knows her stuff well enough to navigate that lab blindfolded.”

“Well, you’re the one that taught me the MSDS system so I’d know when to steer clear of the Alchemy kids at Silas,” said Perry, “but it’s been pretty handy actually. Anyways, cleaning the lab, I happened to notice a loose plug…”

“Wait, don’t tell me,” said Mercy.

“The incubator had been unplugged the entire time,” said Laf.

Mercy let out a sympathetic groan. “Ok, that just hurts.”

“That it did. Certainly was an eye opener.”

“Not that you still don’t pull the occasional all nighter still,” interjected Sky.

“Only under your mother’s watchful eye and with enough water and snacks,” countered Laf, “nothing wrong with pushing for a goal, so long as you’re careful about keeping yourself up.”

“Alright, alright, I get it,” said Mercy before getting caught by a yawn, “speaking of.”

“You two are welcome to stay the night,” offered Perry.

“Thanks Mom, but I think we’ll head home,” said Sky, “thank you so much for dinner.”

“And the advice,” added Mercy, “I really appreciate it.”

“Anytime,” said Perry, giving them each a hug.

Laf came up from behind, wrapping an arm around each of them, “we’re always here for you, don’t forget that. Love you both.

“Love you too Laf,” said Sky, sandwiching her parent in a hug with Mercy.

x-x-x

Sky and Mercy walked into their apartment, turning on a table lamp to see by.

“You just wanna hit bed, babe?” asked Sky.

“Yeah, I— wait, one sec…” Mercy wandered into the study, under Sky’s concerned eye as she watched from the doorway. Placing one hand on the keyboard, she played a short melody. She chuckled silently before picking up the pencil and jotting something down on the manuscript. Putting the pencil down, she turned back to Sky with a smile. “Missed the obvious.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you do when you have writer's block? Write about someone having writer's block of course. This came off a little more PSA-ish then I was intending, but I hope you guys like it anyways.
> 
> Let me know what you think!
> 
> -Juniper


	24. When the Bough Breaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's terrifying when your child gets hurt, but your family is always there to support you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Levy 13; Jaq 12

' _ Oh, oh, oh, sweet child o’ mine’ _

Carmilla gave an annoyed glance to her phone on the coffee table. She and her wives had only each respectively gotten home and had taken the opportunity to relax together in companionable silence before figuring out dinner. The universe, it seemed, had other ideas.

“You gonna get that?” asked Danny from where she was lying at the far end of the couch, her feet in Carmilla's lap.

“Yeah. That's Drix's ringtone. I should see what he wants.”

Reaching over Danny's legs, she plucked the phone off the table, answering it as she lounged back into the cushions again.

“Hey Drix. What's up?”

The line was silent for a moment before she heard a shuddering intake of breath.

“Mama?” came Drix's shaky voice.

Carmilla went rigid at his tone, drawing concerned glances from Laura and Danny. “Drix, what's wrong? What happened?” she asked frantically, instantly drawing her wives to her side.

“I-it’s… it's Jaq. She fell out of a tree,” Drix said, his voice trembling as he spoke, “I'm at the hospital with Levy. Aaron's coming as fast as he can, but he's not here yet. Mama I… I'm trying to stay calm for Levy, but I'm so scared. I've never felt so helpless.”

“Hang on, we'll be right there. I love you.”

“Love you too Mama, thanks.”

Carmilla had barely hung up the call before she launched into a plan of action. “Right, Jaq is hurt. We need to get to the hospital. Laura, Danny and I can get there in minutes if we cut through the woods. Can you call Elsie to let her know before you drive over? Aaron's still trying to get to the hospital, I doubt he's had time to call her and Hunter yet.”

“Done. I'll also grab some of the games and books we have here. Poor Levy is going to need a distraction I think,” confirmed Laura, “you two get going. I’ll be on my way in a flash.” She rushed from the room and headed down to the basement in search of the grandkids’ playthings.

Without any further discussion, Carmilla and Danny headed outside and shifted, launching themselves into the tree line. Carmilla focused on each bound, trying to get a little farther, to push off a little faster, to shave any segment off the time it took her to reach her child in need. Pushing herself to her absolute limit, she had to remind herself that even though she didn’t need to breathe and could drive herself far past normal biological limits, her running companion, however supernaturally inclined, wasn’t so advantaged. Keeping pace with the wolf, the two of them quickly found themselves on the hospital grounds, in the clearing where the pack normally gathered in celebration.

“Let’s… get… inside…” Danny wheezed, trying to catch her breath after shifting back.

“Hold on,” cautioned Carmilla, “take a moment to catch your breath. We made amazing time, we can afford a minute to keep you from collapsing from exhaustion.”

Danny nodded reluctantly, bending over with her hands on her knees as she got her wind back. Carmilla rubbed comforting circles into Danny’s back as she waited for the woman’s breathing to steady and her heart rate to return to normal.

“Ok, let’s head in,” said Danny, still a bit out of breath but feeling well enough to move without collapsing.

The two started to jog around towards the front when the door of the solarium opened, a man in scrubs sticking his head out.

“Hey you two!” he called, “you can come in here. It’ll be faster than running all the way around to the ER.”

“Thanks, this is a huge help,” Danny slipped past the man into the familiar space.

“Of course. Family is important, you shouldn’t have to wait.”

Carmilla paused and studied the man’s face for a moment, kindness filled eyes staring back at her, before a soft smile came to her face. “ _ Dankeschön Vati.” _

_ “Bitte süsses Kinde. _ Now run along, your family is waiting. I’ll be along shortly. _ ” _

Danny wondered about the exchange but decided to leave it until later, there were more important things to worry about right now. Both of them knew the hospital well enough that they found their way to the waiting room of the ER easily. Luckily, it was a quiet evening and they were able to head straight to the nurse’s station.

“Uh, excuse me,” said Danny, getting the nurse’s attention, “we’re looking for our son and granddaughters, one of the girls got hurt and was brought here. Hollis-Maximoff?”

“Oh yes,” she said, flipping through a series of files, “they’re in curtain eight in exam room C. I can take you there.” 

“Thank you, we’d really appreciate that,” Danny replied, following behind.

“Fortunately, it’s a slow night so it’s the only bed in use in there at the moment, so you’ll have some quiet and privacy for the time being.” She stopped beside a door and gestured for them to head inside.

Thanking her again, they entered the room. Clearly visible from the door were Hendrix and Levy cuddled together on a pair of seats. Carmilla jogged up to the two, throwing an arm around each of them.

“We’re here,” she said, holding them tight, “we’re here now.”

“Thanks for coming so fast,” he said, “I really appreciate it and I’m sure Jaq will too.” He nodded over her shoulder to the bed that had been obscured by a curtain when they’d looked from the door.

On the bed lay Jaq, fast asleep and covered in bandages. Most noticeable were large ones on her arm and head. It was a heart breaking sight for Carmilla, who moved over to Jaq’s bedside, taking the girls unbandaged hand in her own.

“They've given her something for the pain so she's able to rest,” said Drix, “now we're just waiting on a diagnosis. Her arm is definitely broken and we're waiting to see if she hurt her head or something like that”

“So, what happened?” asked Danny, sitting down beside Levy and reaching around Drix’s shoulders to pull the three of them closer together.

“It was me.”

Danny looked down at Levy, not entirely certain that the small voice had come from her. “What was that sweetie?”

“It was my fault,” said Levy, a bit more loudly.

“Oh honey,” comforted Drix, “I already told you, this isn’t your fault.”

“Yes it is!” she argued, “I was roosting in that tree and she’d been trying to call me down. I was comfy and didn’t want to fly down, so I ignored her. If I hadn’t, she wouldn’t have tried to climb up and then she wouldn’t have fallen.”

“Levy, you can’t torture yourself with ‘what-ifs’ and ‘would-haves’,” said Danny, “Jaq loves to climb trees, just like everyone in our family. It could have happened at any time, to any of us. It was just a bad chance that it happened now.”

“Yeah,” agreed Drix, “she's sat with you when you've roosted before without trouble. Trust me, you had nothing to do with her falling.”

“If you say so,” mumbled Levy, her voice lacking conviction.

Drix looked at his daughter sadly and pulled her closer to himself, trying to reassure her as tears silently ran down her face. Drix's own eyes began to water as he bit his lip, trying to keep his composure.

“Hey Danny,” said Carmilla, who'd been watching her son's tense state, “you mind watching the girls for a moment? I need to talk to Drix”

“Yeah, no problem,” she said, lifting her arm to let Drix out before hugging Levy close to her.

Carmilla led Drix out into the hall, moving out of sight of the room’s windows. Once she was satisfied they were out of earshot, she turned and pulled him into a tight hug.

Drix's walls crumbled and he began sobbing into his mother's shoulder. “Mama, I was so scared. I saw her fall. I watched her climb up that tree, like she's done so many times before, I didn't think anything of it.” Drix paused and took a shuddering breath, “And then she slipped, and everything just seemed to slow down. She was halfway down before I even could react. I moved as fast as I could, but all I accomplished was being able to watch her hit the ground up close. Her scream of pain is the most terrifying thing I've ever heard and her arm… it was so torn up. Seeing my baby like that. Mama, how could I let this happen?”

“Drix, this isn’t your fault any more than it is Levy’s,” Carmilla said, stepping back to look him in the eyes, “don’t drive yourself crazy wondering what you might have done differently. You love them and you care for them and you teach them in hopes they can keep themselves safe, but you can’t shield them from everything, not without stifling who they are.”

“She’s right, you know,” added Aaron as he walked up, Drix’s shoulders slumped in relief as he stepped over and hugged his husband. “So, how are our girls doing?”

“Jaq is resting while we wait for a diagnosis. Levy is a wreck, she blames herself and I don’t know how to convince her otherwise,” said Drix.

“Oh, my poor angels,” said Aaron sadly, “but don’t worry. We’ll get them through this. This’ll all be a family story before you know it. I’m gonna head in and check on them, then I’ll try get a hold of my parents, let them know what happened.”

“Laura said she was going to try to get a hold of them before heading over, so they shouldn’t be far behind her,” said Carmilla.

“Thanks, you guys are the best.”

“No, we’re family.”

x-x-x

“What is taking them so long?” complained Elsie, “this place is a ghost town.”

“Els, you’ve only been here ten minutes,” said Laura, a skeptical look on her face which was quickly mirrored by Elsie.

“I know that, but I’m not the one in pain and in need of a doctor.”

“Mom,” interjected Aaron, “Jaq is fast asleep and doesn’t seem to be in any danger. We can afford to give the doctors time.”

Elsie crossed her arms and took a deep breath. “You’re right, I just don’t like waiting.”

“Well, hopefully I can alleviate some of that stress,” came a voice from the door.

“Zeke!” said Carmilla happily, “am I ever glad to see you.”

“It is always good to see you as well child, even in such unfortunate circumstances,” he said, referring to the chart in his hands, “I’m terribly sorry about the wait. I’ve arranged for the hospital to always contact me before proceeding with procedures on my patients, unless it’s a dire emergency. It slows things down, but it helps keep the natures of my patients from being uncovered.”

“That’s perfectly alright Dr. Antos,” said Aaron, “we appreciate the caution, but since you’re here now, what can you tell us?”

“Well, the good news is that young Jacqueline managed to avoid any head or spinal injuries, so she’s not in any long term danger,” explained Dr. Antos. The relief that filled the room was almost palpable, “the bad news on the other hand is that her right arm is badly damaged. I imagine that she either fell right on it or hit a branch on the way, but her ulna is shattered and her radius is cracked in several places. She’ll require surgery to realign the bone fragments and hold them in place.”

Drix felt the wind rush out of him. Logically, he knew that a procedure of this sort was minor and safe, but all that was going through his mind was that his little girl needed surgery. The thought made his heart clench. The room seemed to go out of focus and fill with a dull buzzing sound until he felt something warm grip his hand, providing a rush of comfort. Looking up to find Aaron at his side, Drix took a deep breath and looked back to Zeke. “How soon can you get her into surgery?”

“I’d like to proceed immediately, if you’ll allow,” said Dr. Antos, “we want to get in before the bones start to knit themselves together wrong.”

Drix shared a brief look with Aaron, who simply nodded. There was really no question about it.

“Yeah Doc, let’s get her in there.”

“Good, I’ll go prep and send a nurse to get Jacqueline ready,” he said, opening the door before pausing, “oh and one more thing, I think you may have lost something.” Zeke held the door open as a chagrined looking Rafael walked into the room under Dr. Antos’ knowing smirk. “Can you please see if you can get him to stop possessing the interns? Even if he keeps them on their routines, they are always terribly disoriented afterwards.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Don’t worry Zeke, I think that it won’t be a problem.”

“Indeed it won’t. I sincerely apologize, I meant no harm,” offered Rafael.

“Glad to hear it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have surgery to prep for,” said Dr. Antos before heading on his way.

Aaron got up and walked over to Jaq, giving her a soft kiss on the forehead. “Jaq, sweetie. You need to wake up for a moment.”

Jaq stirred, groaning softly. “Daddy?”

“Yep, it’s me. How you feeling?”

“Floaty,” replied Jaq, not really focussing on anything in particular, “still hurts a bit.”

“I know sweetie,” comforted Aaron, “Dr. Antos just came to talk to us. You’re going to be alright, but you need surgery.”

“Surgery?” asked Jaq, curiosity, not concern in her voice, “what kind of surgery?”

“Well, they have to do surgery on your arm,” answered Drix, “your bones are all messed up and they need to go in and put them back where they belong.”

“Oh, ok,” said Jaq distantly, “that sounds important. I kinda need my bones where they belong.”

“That you do,” said Drix with a smile, “they’ll fix you right up.”

“Good,” she mumbled as she started to drift asleep again, “love you Papa.”

“Love you too, sweetie.” Drix gave the sleeping girl a kiss and remained standing by her bedside until the team of nurses came in to whisk her off to surgery.

x-x-x

“I can walk on my own. It was my arm that broke, not my legs.” Jaq held up her right arm, showing off the brightly coloured polymer cast holding it rigid.

“I know my dear,” said Dr. Antos, “but we make everyone ride in a wheelchair until they’re outside. It’s just a safety measure.”

“Fine, I’ve been stuck in that bed for two days,” mused Jaq, “I can stand a few more minutes in a wheelchair. Onward Jeeves!”

Aaron laughed as he pushed the chair forward. “Well, I’m glad to see your spirit has certainly recovered.”

He pushed her, with Dr. Antos at their side, through the halls to the floor nurse’s station where her Papa and sister stood waiting.

“You’ll have to wait here a minute girls,” said Drix, “your Dad and I need to finish up some paperwork before we head out.”

“Ok!” said Jaq brightly before turning to her sister who was simply staring at the floor. “Alright Levy, I know it must’ve been nice having the place to yourself, but there’s no use pouting about it. I’m coming home and that’s that.”

Levy’s head snapped up, her eyes full of sadness and hurt. “What do you mean? Of course I want you home. What kind of sister would I be to want you in a place like this?”

“Whoa, calm down Le-le. I was joking. You ok?”

The question just seemed to agitate Levy even more. “Am I ok? Jaq, your arm is broken, you were in the hospital and it’s my fault.”

“Your fault? What? Why?”

“You were trying to call me. I didn’t listen and you tried to come up to see me… and you fell.”

“That’s stupid.”

“What?!”

“I said that’s stupid. You didn’t make me climb the tree. You certainly didn’t make me fall. I fell cause I was trying to beat my time to the top and missed a branch.”

“But I…”

“No. Levy, I love you. I know you’d never hurt me. This wasn’t your fault, I was just careless.”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure. I’m your sister. I’m always right.”

“Wait, no you’re not!”

“Yes I am, it’s just a fact.”

“Well, if you’re always right how did you fall out of a tree?”

“Oh, so it is my fault then?”

“Yeah it… wait… no… yeah, I guess it is.”

“Good,” Jaq gave Levy a light punch in the arm, “I’d hate for this to get in our way. Plenty of good trees left to climb. There’s apparently a huge one near the lake that Papa used to nap in, that one should be fun to climb.”

“Ahem,” interrupted Drix.

“With proper supervision, of course.”

“Of course,” said Drix skeptically, “which is one of the first things we’ll be discussing about climbing trees once we’re home young lady.”

“Oh here we go,” Jaq groaned.

“It’s all fun and games until someone breaks an arm,” joked Levy, making Jaq laugh.

“Alright you two,” prompted Aaron, pushing Jaq’s chair towards the exit, “let’s get you home and changed. Your grandmothers are throwing a ‘get well’ party and it’d better if we weren’t late. They’re going to think something else broke or something awful like that.

“Well let’s get going then,” said Jaq, “I’ve been eating hospital food for two days now, some home cooking would really hit the spot.”

“Done and done. Let’s head home,” said Drix as they pushed out the front doors and into the sunshine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick refresher for anyone who may not recall from You Do for Family, ~~Jaq~~ Levy is biologically Drix's daughter, a vampire like him, and able to turn into an owl.
> 
> Edit: Okay, I'm an idiot and got the girls backwards. Levy is the vamp, Jaq is human. I've swapped them in the chapter, everything else can continue as normal. Sorry all.
> 
> This mostly came from the idea of Drix calling Carmilla, needing someone to talk to about the scary part of being a parent.
> 
> As always, let me know what you think! 
> 
> -Juniper


	25. Puss in Boots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sue's boots were a success, so she makes more for everyone. But will she manage to meet everyone's tastes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow-up to "Snow Booties" from You Do for Family

“Mercy Hollis! It's five below out there. Get back here and let me put on your paw covers before your pads freeze.”

The young wolf let out an annoyed huff from where she'd stopped at the bottom of the stairs. With drooped ears, she turned and trudged back up to the deck, holding out her front paw to her mother.

“Oh, don't give me that expression young lady,” chided Danny as she slipped on the first red bootie, “I know you're eager to get moving, but you know as well as I do that you'll be whining to turn around in ten minutes without them.”

Mercy's head sunk a little lower, admitting her mother was right. Within minutes, all four covers were cinched up and secure and Mercy all but launched herself off the deck to play in the snow while she waited for the rest of the pack to come outside.

“Mom, those new boots you made for them fit perfectly,” Danny said as Sue stepped out into the brisk winter air, “I can’t believe they grew out of the first set so fast.”

“They’ll be grown before you know it,” said Sue.

“Don’t remind me, I wish they’d stay young forever.”

“I remember feeling like that once, but if that had been the case, I wouldn’t have grandchildren.”

“I suppose you wouldn’t.” Danny laughed.

There was a rush of air as a small black blur rushed past them and out into the snow. Mercy only had time to look up before her brother tackled her into a snowdrift. The snow seemed to explode as the two began rolling around in a playful tussle.

“Fortunately, these ones are waterproof for that exact reason,” added Sue, gesturing to the maelstrom.

“How did you  _ knit _ waterproof boots?” asked Danny, raising an eyebrow at her mom.

“I found a website that sells polar yarn; it’s pretty much plastic. Really soft, fuzzy plastic.”

“Clever,” said Carmilla, joining the other women, “now I'm kinda doubly envious of those, not that I really need them like the kids do, but warm pads in the winter sounds so nice.”

“You're in luck then,” said Sue, drawing quizzical stares from Carmilla and Danny, “since the first sets were such a success, I've been making them for the entire pack, you two included.”

“Really?” asked Carmilla, a gleam of excitement in her eyes.

“Yes really. They're in a bag by the front door, just find the set with your name on it.”

With matching grins, the two made their way into the house to find a paper shopping bag beside everyone's shoes. Reaching into the bag, Danny pulled out a set of teal boots, joined by a thread, with her name dangling from a tag. She looked over the boots, an impressed look on her face, as she absently handed the bag to Carmilla, who greedily dug into the contents.

Making her way past a multitude of gloves, scarves and woolen hats, obviously intended for more conventional circumstances, she plunged her hands to the bottom of the bag and pulled out the clutch of items she was seeking. 

“Uh…” started Danny, holding back laughter, “are you sure those are yours?”

Carmilla nodded slowly, absently turning the tag with her name clearly written in black marker so Danny could see it as she he looked over exquisite workmanship of the paw covers. The garments were noticeably wider than the ones Danny had, to accommodate the panther’s far larger paws. The weave seemed impossibly tight and secure; without a doubt, they would keep water and snow out. However, what was most readily apparent to the two women,was the boots’ colour.

“Carm… they’re pink. Hot pink.”

Carmilla bit her lip, nodding to herself, “yes, yes they are. Mind giving me a hand putting them on?”

Danny looked at Carmilla like she’d just sprouted a second head, “uh, okay.”

Carmilla shifted and put out her front paw for Danny to put the first boot onto. As Danny secured the first one, she failed to miss the twitching of Carmilla’s ears as they seemed to want to fold back. Carmilla, however, continued to offer each paw without hesitation.

Once all four paws were secure, Carmilla nuzzled Danny in thanks and then headed for the back door as coolly as she could manage, leaving Danny feeling torn. On the one hand, she was mildly concerned about how her wife was feeling about the situation, but on the other hand, watching the panther try to maintain her cool, dark-as-the-night, vibe with four pink booties on was quite possibly one of the funniest things she had ever seen. Biting her lips to hold back her laughter, she followed Carmilla towards the back of the house.

Entering the kitchen, Carmilla tried to sneak through to the back door and into the snow before anyone noticed? She, however, froze when an exclamation from a familiar voice spoiled her plan.

“Oh Carm, you look adorable!” cried Laura from where she was standing at the kitchen counter, where she’d been pulling out mugs for hot drinks once everyone got back, “oh my goodness, let me grab my camera!”

Carmilla puffed up in fright at the mention of the camera and without any further hesitation, she bolted out of the house, ignoring Laura’s stuttered protests behind her.

“Sorry hun,” Danny consoled, “I’m not sure why she decided to wear those, but I think that pictures are beyond what she’s willing to be subjected to tonight.”

“Ugh, fine,” Laura conceded.

“Tell you what, help me get mine on and I’ll let you take a couple of snaps when we get back from the run” Danny held out her own bundle to Laura.

Laura’s dejection disappeared in moments. “Okay, deal!” She grabbed the bundle of boots from Danny and in just a few minutes, she had all four secured to the wolf’s feet.

Danny trotted out onto the deck, already enjoying the layer of warmth between her feet and the cold wood. Down in the yard, everyone was jumping around and playing in the snow. Across the yard, Carmilla could easily be seen, pink shod paws waving around in the air as Drix and Mercy jumped all over her. Looking around at everyone playing, she realized that she was the last pack member to join the group outside. With a sharp yip, she grabbed everyone’s attention and began leading the way into the trees

x-x-x

The back door of the house opened as everyone started to come back into the warmth, the aroma of fresh coffee and hot chocolate pervading the air. Quickly, some of the cousins set about handing out the hot drinks, everyone thanking Laura for readying the refreshments while everyone was out

“My dear,” said Paul as he came in, “I’d say these boots of yours are an unqualified success. I don’t think we’ve ever felt like staying out that long in these temperatures before; my paws weren’t sore at all. We might even be able to coax Mom and Dad to join us on some of these, the cold won’t bother them anywhere near as much.”

Sue laughed, placing a calming hand on his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re excited about them. I definitely seem to have a pattern that works for them now, so making more should be no issue whatsoever.”

“They were fantastic, Mom,” added Zach, “not to mention fashionable, eh?” He playfully nudged Carmilla with his elbow as she walked past him.

She rolled her eyes but said nothing, a ghost of a smirk on her face.

“Oh now leave her alone, it’s a fine colour,” said Paul with a hint of a snicker, “first time we we’ve been able to easily see you at night.” The two men both started chuckling at the remark.

Carmilla narrowed her eyes playfully at them. “Ok, snow down both your backs, next chance I get.” They paused momentarily at the threat, before breaking down even more.

“Ok, both of you, quiet down now,” scolded Sue, cuffing them both lightly.

“Mom?” asked Danny, “why  _ did _ you choose pink for Carmilla’s boots?”

“Well…” Sue hesitated, a chagrined smile crossing her face, “I kind of meant it as a joke.”

“What?” asked Danny, aghast. She looked at Carmilla, expecting a similar look of betrayal, but instead she was only wearing a small smile as she gazed at Sue.

“I never actually meant for her to wear them,“ Sue admitted, “those were my test pair for the shape. I figured she’d say something about the colour and then I was going to give her the real ones. Just a quick laugh for us to share.” Sue directed her attention to Carmilla. “Instead you just put them on and went straight outside before I could talk to you.”

“Well, of course I did,” said Carmilla, “regardless of the colour, it was obvious you put a lot of effort into them. I wasn’t going to act like a spoiled brat and refuse an amazing gift just because I don’t like the colour.”

“Oh my dear,” cooed Sue, “I knew there was a reason I liked having you as a daughter-in-law.” Sue strode across the room and enveloped Carmilla in a tight hug, before pulling away, still holding Carmilla by the shoulders. “Well, as much as I appreciate the gesture, I have something a little more to your taste.” Sue smiled broadly before turning and heading into the living room.

“Have I ever told you you’re amazing?” asked Danny, wrapping an arm around Carmilla.

“Many times, but I could stand to hear it at least once more.”

Danny could only chuckle as she pulled her wife close, melting into her before Sue came back into the kitchen.

“These are the ones I intended to give you, if you hadn’t been so noble.”

“Hey,” protested Carmilla, “I am not noble. I’m stubborn.”

“The broody vampire has spoken,” joked Laura from her perch on the island, “she is not noble, heroic, romantic or in anyway a softie of any sort.”

“Exactly,” Carmilla deadpanned, “glad someone gets it.”

“Fine, you’re not noble. Now here,” said Sue through her laughter.

The new boots were much more to her taste. The knitwork was just as good, if not better than the pink ones. The boot itself was black but the trim and lacings were done in deep purple. These were boots she could genuinely see herself enjoying a run in.

“Thank you, Sue. I love these.”

“Good, I’m glad.”

“Well, now that that is settled,” said Laura, hopping down from the counter, “I believe I was promised cute pictures of a wolf in boots.”

Danny rolled her eyes, but smiled. “Alright, help me get these back on and we can take them out on the deck.”

“Y’know what?” said Carmilla, “I think I’ll join you.”

“Oh?” said Danny, “want to show off your new boots already?”

“No,” she replied, grabbing the pink boots, “I had some different attire in mind.”

With a squeak of glee, Laura quickly grabbed her camera and the three stepped outside to commemorate the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, hope you enjoyed this one. This one is the result of a long chain of comments and suggestions stemming from the original "Lawrence Family Dynamics" and Sue's knitting. I really liked the idea of poor Carmilla enduring bright pink winter wear, so I ran with it.
> 
> Let me know what you think!
> 
> -Juniper


	26. Been Hoping That You’d Drop In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of the semester brings finals, holidays and no few hazards.

“Danny Lawrence! I have put up with your annoyances for far too long. We are doing this, right here, right now!”

“You serious, Hollis? Let's go then. You have no idea what you're getting into. Bring it on!”

“Oh, consider it brought, why I oughta—”

“Would you two just roll the dice already?”

Laura and Danny looked over to where the vampire was lounging on her side of the Risk board, an exasperated expression on her face.

“Aw, c'mon Carm,” pleaded Laura, “the grandstanding is half the fun.”

“I have to say, it loses its appeal around the thirtieth exchange or so.”

“You just say that cause you're losing,” taunted Danny.

“Losing or not, you still haven't rolled the dice.”

The two women shared a glance and rolled their eyes at their girlfriend before each rolling their dice onto the board.

“Ha!” exclaimed Laura, “in your face!” She moved her pieces into place and ended her turn with a little fist-pumping dance in front of the Summers’ Christmas tree.

“Rest well troops,” lamented Danny, picking up her defeated pieces, “I swear you will be avenged.”

“Yeah, about that,” interjected Carmilla as she dropped a wealth of pieces in front of her, “I'm cashing in some cards.”

“Uh, Laura?” said Danny, her eyes widening as Carmilla placed her new legions onto the board, “I think we're in trouble.”

Laura flopped back down into her chair, “correction,  _ you're _ in trouble. Me and Carm have an alliance.”

“Correction,  _ had  _ an alliance.” Carmilla smirked. “I think I'll start with that lovely little collection in North America there.”

“No, not my Canadians! What'd they ever do to you?”

“They know what they did.” The vampire chuckled. “Now roll.”

When the plastic carnage finally ended, a pouting Laura had been wiped from the board whilst Danny had been left with a single toe-hold in Madagascar.

“Welp, that was illuminating,” said Danny, “Well played, Carm. Good game.”

“Noooo,” whined Laura, “don't give up. You can still battle back.”

“As much as I appreciate the confidence you've got in my four soldiers there,” said Danny, “I think the great Karnstein empire has me beat.”

“My rule will be brutal, but fair,” said Carmilla, “and my first decree is for my defeated opponents to pay me tribute. Specifically, right here.” She pointed playfully to her lips, pursing them for effect.

“Thy will be done,” said Danny, smiling as she leaned across the coffee table, softly meeting Carmilla's lips.

They parted with a slightly dreamy look in both of their eyes before they each turned to Laura expectantly.

She pouted back. “Fine, but”—she licked her lips—”I'm gonna do this properly.”

“Wha—” was all that Carmilla managed to get out before she found herself pressed back into the couch cushions, an enthusiastic Laura attached to her face.

“If you rabbits are gonna start that, can you please take it up to Danny's room? We'd really like to not have to steam clean that couch.”

All three girls jumped, turning beet red at the interruption. Elsie was leaning against the doorway with a smug grin plastered across her face. The three of them started talking over one another, stammering helplessly.

“Dudes, it's alright,” said Elsie, “I'm kidding... mostly. Like seriously, don't do it on the couches, Mel would flip; but I'm just giving you guys a hard time.”

“You still make a good point,” said Laura, brushing her hair back behind her ears before checking her phone, “and as much as I’m sure Carm didn’t appreciate your interruption”—the vampire glared at the blonde as if to agree—”we should be going.”

“What, seriously?” asked Danny, “it’s not even nine.”

“I know,” said Laura as she began to clean up the board, “but I’ve got my final for Professor Cochrane’s class in a couple days. I need to hit the books.”

“Seriously cupcake?” said Carmilla, disbelief on her face, “I thought this was your easy one.”

“Easy to pass? Yes, but I owe it to Dr. Cochrane to give it my best effort to try and ace the exam.”

“Good for you Laura.” Danny beamed at her girlfriend. “With that attitude you’ll knock it out of the park. This is your last final, right?”

“Yep! Then it’s Christmas time!” Laura stuck both fists in the air, squealing happily.

“And you’re done the next day, right Red?” asked Carmilla.

“Yeah. I just have to defend a paper that morning,” said Danny as all three got up, making their way into the front entrance, “and then we can load the car and head home, bright and early the next day.”

“Ooh, I can’t wait. Our first Christmas together.” Laura was practically vibrating with excitement as she pulled on her coat. “Not to mention I’ll get to join in on all the fun I missed last year, really experience the Lawrence family dyn—”

“Where the hell do you halfwits think you’re going?”

Laura turned around, her hand still on the front door handle, to where Mel was standing on the stairs. “Umm… back to the dorms. I thought you’d be happy to have us out of your hair.”

“Normally, yes, I’d be ecstatic,” said Mel, “however, have any of you looked out a window in the past hour or so.”

The three looked at each other before all shaking their heads, no.

“Of course you haven’t.” Mel rolled her eyes and shook her head in annoyance. “Well, allow me to illuminate the situation for you.” She strode past them into an adjacent room with a large picture window, from which she drew back the heavy curtains. Right away, there was an immediate temperature drop as the exposed window seemed to leech heat from the room and anyone in it. The lights of the lodge illuminated an absolute blizzard of snow outside, falling thickly and not letting up.

“Okay yeah, it’s snowing pretty heavily” scoffed Carmilla, “but I don’t see anything besides that.”

“That’s exactly my point. You can’t see  _ anything _ else,” stressed Mel, “we should be able to see the lights of campus from here, but it’s snowing so heavily that it’s completely blacked out. You’d probably get turned around with a landmark and in these temperatures, you’d freeze before you could fight your way through it to the dorms.”

“Alright, so trying to head back wouldn’t be all that smart right now,” conceded Laura.

“Not that that’s stopped you before, but no time like the present to start,” snarked Mel as she pulled the curtains shut again against the cold.

Laura glared at her, but otherwise didn’t respond to the barb.

“You okay waiting til tomorrow to study?” asked Danny.

“Yeah,” said Laura, “like Carm said, it’s my easy one.” Laura smiled, but there was a definite note of disappointment in her voice.

Danny frowned. “Is there anyway you can study from here? Online notes or something?”

Laura considered the option. “Yeah, that could work for now. The bulk of what I really need are my index cards and compiled examples, but any port in a storm, or well, blizzard.”

“C’mon, let’s go get some cookies and cocoa from the kitchen and then I’ll set you up with my laptop.”

“Okay,” said Laura, a little more brightly as she made her way towards to lodge’s kitchen.

Carmilla, however, hung back, looking thoughtful.

“What?” asked Danny

“Y’know, I could go grab her stuff and bring it back here.”

“I’m sorry, did you not hear Mel’s little speech just now. We can’t go out there.”  

“No,  _ you _ can’t go out there. The cold isn’t really any concern to me and I should be able to power through the snow quickly enough.”

“You’ll get lost.”

“Please. I’ve been coming to this school for half a century, I know my way around it like the back of my hand. Even if I do get turned around, I can just follow my nose to whatever atrocity the alchemy nerds are cooking up this week to get my bearings again. Trust me, I’ll be fine and it’ll cheer Laura up.”

Danny bit her lip in thought for a moment before exhaling. “Ok fine, but be careful and please try not to be gone too long.”

“Promise,” said Carmilla, giving Danny a quick hug before speeding out the front door, barely a hint of a draft coming in as she opened and shut the door behind her.

Danny continued to stare at the door for another long moment before going and joining Laura in the kitchen.

x-x-x

“It’s been over an hour.”

Laura and Danny were seated on the steps in the lodge’s front hall, watching the door for Carmilla’s return. When Carmilla had first left, Laura had shrugged it off, confident in the vampire’s abilities and touched by the gesture. However, as the minutes ticked by without Carmilla’s return, she became less able to focus on the computer in front of her, eventually dragging Danny back downstairs to wait.

Danny sighed. “I’m sure she’s fine,” she said, despite her own growing feeling of unease.

“Why did you let her go out in this?” Laura asked forlornly.

“Let her?” Danny raised an eyebrow at Laura.

“Ok fine, you’re right. Once she’s set on something…” Laura said, before laughing softly, “it’s such an annoying quality, how on earth do you put up with it?”

Danny wrapped her arm around Laura and held her close.

“I dunno, I find it kind of endearing.”

The two settled into an uneasy silence, holding onto each other for more than warmth. The sounds of the rest of the sisters could be heard from throughout the house, but it still felt too quiet to the couple.

“Should… should we go try to look for her?” asked Laura.

“No.” Danny voice was firm, her eyes squeezed closed, telling herself as much as Laura. “We’d only end up with three people lost instead of one, and you and I can’t take those temperatures for long. Like it or not, if she’s lost, she can survive out there and we’ll just have to wait fo—”

A loud scratching sound came from the front accompanied by a very familiar, low groan. Before Danny could even react, Laura all but launched herself at the door, letting in a very irritated looking panther. Her fur was caked with snow and in her jaws, she was carrying Laura's backpack.

“Carm! You're okay! I mean, you are okay, right? You look okay, but it's hard to tell with this snow,” babbled Laura, as she accepted her backpack from the cat “I was so worried, I mean thank you for getting stuff for me but I would have been— is this blood?”

On Laura's backpack, where Carmilla had been holding it, there was a notable blood stain. Looking back at the cat, worry written all over her face, Laura could make out the sheen of the dark blood staining her muzzle.

“It's not hers, I can smell it,” said Danny calmly, running up with an armload of towels from who-knows-where, “let’s get her dried off first, we can worry about the blood once we’re done.” Tossing a towel over Carmilla's back and handing a few to a much-relieved Laura, they started to dry the panther off. 

Under her partners’ ministrations, Carmilla quickly found herself calming down and unconsciously began to lean into their attentions, her eyes closing contentedly, much to Laura and Danny's amusement. Before long, with her coat nearly dry and muzzle gently wiped clean, she shifted back to her human form, plopping down onto the steps in exhaustion.

“Alright,” said Carmilla, “that would have been far easier is someone has told me there was a goddamn wendigo stalking around.”

“A wendigo?!” yelled Danny.

There was a thump and the sound of running from upstairs as sisters came running at Danny's exclamation.

“Where'd you see it?” asked Mel, already pulling on her coat as she ran down the stairs, “I don't care how cold it is out there, we're not going to let one run loose in our forest.”

“Whoa, cool your jets there She-ra,” said Carmilla, “I said 'was’. Damn thing was dumb enough to try to put me on the menu. I was on my way back, and it jumped out at me from a snow bank. I don’t think it ever realized I wasn’t human, even after I shifted. It just kept trying to grab me, oblivious to the damage I was doing. In the end, I had to tear the stupid thing to shreds. It took forever”

“Well thank god for that,” said Mel, “ for the record, I still think you’re an idiot for going out in that, but you probably saved some lives. so I guess it evens out.”

“So glad I meet your approval,” muttered Carmilla. Mel simply shrugged and headed back up the stairs.

Satisfied the situation the resolved, the summers began trickling back to where they’d come from around the lodge, eventually leaving the trio alone, cuddling on the stairs.

“I suppose we better head back upstairs so you can get back to your studying,” said Danny.

“Do I have to?” asked Laura, clinging tenaciously to Carmilla, “after all the excitement, I kinda just wanna hold Carm for a while.”

“Oh hell no,” said Carmilla, “I just went trudging through ice, snow and most of an undead fiend to get you these notes.”

“Alright alright,” said Laura, opening her backpack, “ugh, this is gonna need a wash.” Rummaging through the contents, she first pulled out a blood bag. “Uh, Carm?”

“Oh yeah, forgot about those.” Carmilla smirked. “I decided bring over some dinner since you probably don’t have any here.”

“You’re right, we don’t, but we can start keeping some in my mini-fridge so you don’t have to worry about carting it around… or draining my sisters,” said Danny.

“Spoilsport.”

Laura proceeded to pull a thick folder of notes, which she proceeded to open before freezing, giving the other two an awkward smile.

“Uh, Carm? These are my lit notes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm giving myself a little challenge for December. I'm trying to make four chapters (one for each Tuesday in the month), from successive points on the timeline, all based (loosely) on Xmas songs. This week is 'Baby, it's Cold Outside'. Don't ask me why, I find it such a creepy song, but it just got stuck. (I suppose it fits "Let it snow" too, but I happened to have the other one in my head)
> 
> Let me know if you have any suggestions for other songs I could use and as always, let me know what you think.
> 
> Happy Holidays!  
> -Juniper


	27. Out the Door into the Snow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deer can be a very festive symbol, but also a rather hazardous one.

“I can’t believe that you bought those for the kids.”

“Oh don’t be jealous, I got some for you too.”

“Why on earth would I want to put those on?”

“Why not? They’re adorable.”

“They’re demeaning.”

“They are not! Carm, back me up on this.”

“Sorry Red. I’d normally agree with you, but they just look too cute. Besides, they’re enjoying it, so what’s the harm really?”

Danny huffed, returning her attention to her parents’ backyard where the kids were playing in the snow. 

“You have to admit,” said Zach, walking up beside her, “the antlers make them look pretty cute.”

Of course, Danny didn’t want to admit that the pairs of felt antlers donning the heads of her children, made them look extra joyful as they bounded around.

“They’re cute anyways,” groused Danny.

“Of course they are,“ he agreed, “but this is just so festive. A little herd of reindeer all our own. I know Xavier loves his.”

“Those things are made for dogs, you know?”

“And?”

“We’re not dogs.”

“Neither’s Laura, but she has a set on too.”

Danny couldn’t help but glance at her wife, who was in the process of trying to get Carmilla to don another set of the fuzzy headwear. She couldn’t help the smile that slid onto her face as she watched to exchange.

“Ah! I saw that. You smiled. You’re not such an antler grinch after all.”

“No, I suppose not,” admitted Danny, “dog costumes have always bugged me since the poor dog gets no say in the matter, but I guess that doesn’t really apply here… and you already knew that was the issue and just talked me into hashing it out for myself.”

“Correct on both counts,” said Zach smugly, “I’d be a pretty lousy social worker if I couldn’t even tell what was actually bothering my sister. What chance would I have with a stranger?”

“Not much of one,” she said, “thanks.”

“No problem,” he said as Sue came out of the house onto the deck, “hi Mom.”

“Hi sweetie,” said Sue, “just wanted to check if everyone was doing fine out here. Anyone need more coffee or cocoa to stay warm?”

“No thanks Sue,” said Laura, “you’ve been amazing all day, thank you. Several murmurs of thanks echoed Laura’s sentiment.

“Well, just let me know. In the meantime,” said Sue, revealing a large plastic container that she’d been hiding behind her back, “I’ve got some treats for our little reindeer.” 

“Ooh, anything good?” said Laura, a greedy glint in her eye.

“Sure is,” Sue replied, pulling off the lid and showing Laura the chunks of raw meat in the container, “choice lamb from the butcher.”

“Oh yeah,” said Laura, fighting to keep a smile on her face, “yummy.”

Sue chuckled and resealed the container, heading down the steps to the lawn. “Oh Danny,” she added, looking over her shoulder, “could you grab the tin of cookies off the kitchen counter? We’ll need something for Charlie too… and Laura might like one as well.” Laura’s cheeks turned pink at the comment.

Danny chuckled. “Sure Mom, I’ll be right— Mom, look out!”

Sue turned back to realize, moments too late, that’s she’d blundered right into the path of an ongoing chase. Unable to stop in time, Mercy plowed straight into her grandmother’s legs, knocking her off her feet and straight into the snow. Drix, who’d been right behind Mercy, didn’t fare much better and came to a stop with his front paws on Sue’s back.

It seemed to take a moment for them to realize what had happened. Everyone remained frozen until the twelve year old panther realized whom he was standing on and jumped back with a yowl.

“Mom!” cried Danny and Zach at the same time, running down the steps.

“I'm alright,” Sue groaned, levering herself up out of the snow, “brrr, that's cold.”

“Are you hurt?” asked Zach, looking his mother over for any sign of injury as she brushed herself off.

“Only my pride,” she joked as Mercy walked up, ears folded, head and tail hanging low, and a sad look in her eyes. Sue took one look at the pup and immediately knelt back in the snow to gather her into a hug. “Oh sweetie, it's not your fault. I wasn't watching where I was going and stepped right in front of you.” 

Mercy seemed satisfied by this, yipping softly as her tail began to wag.

“Besides,” added Sue, letting the youngster go, “it's not the first time I've been bowled over by a runaway deer.”

Mercy cocked her head to one side, watching her grandmother expectantly. 

“It happened a few years ago, just after your big sister was born…”

<-<-<

_ Laura walked into living room, little Charlie sitting comfortably in her arms. A small legion of relatives had descended on the Hollis house had to help decorate while Laura had taken the five-month-old out to run errands— _

**Mom, wait…**

>->->

“What?” asked Sue, visibly annoyed at Danny's interruption.

“Mom, you're soaked. You'll freeze if you just stand around out here,” said Danny, gesturing at her mother's clothing, “you actually have a pair of paw prints on your back.”

“Too bad it's just water, it'd make a nice memento,” said Sue, “alright, I’ll head inside and change. Why don’t you give everyone their treats and then bring them in for some hot chocolate.”

“Sure Mom,” said Danny, picking the container up from where it had fallen as Sue made her way inside.

By the time she came back downstairs, the family had all returned inside the house with Laura busily making the hot chocolate in the kitchen. Sue had long since learned to leave the small woman to her own devices when it came to hot cocoa; she had the technique to making it down to a science and would brook no interference, no matter how well intentioned. 

Satisfied the task was in hand, Sue went and sat at the kitchen table where some of the kids were amusing themselves with books and cards as they awaited the warm treat. Once she’d sat down, however, Sue found herself the target of several curious gazes.

She smiled, folding her hands in front of herself. “Alright, let’s try this again.”

<-<-<

_ Laura walked into living room, little Charlie sitting comfortably in her arms. A small legion of relatives had descended on the Hollis house had to help decorate while Laura had taken the five-month-old out to run errands, leaving the room fully decked out in holiday cheer. _

_ Laura, as well as every person in the room, kept their attention on the infant as her eyes went wide, taking in the display of colour and light that had taken over the familiar room. Moving to the middle, Laura turned in a slow circle, showing Charlie every candle, trinket and garland, stopping on the tree, trimmed in colourful lights and ornaments. Charlie looked around in wonder, babbling a little at the new stimuli. _

_ Eventually, Laura lay Charlie down on a blanket next to Danny, where she could wiggle herself around to look at what she wished before taking a seat on the couch. “Thank you all so much for taking care of all this,” said Laura, “I really wanted her first christmas experience to be special.” _

_ “No thanks necessary Laura,” said Paul as he sipped a cup of coffee, “not only were we all happy to help, the look on this little sweetie’s face made the entire endeavour worthwhile.” _

_ “Agreed, it was a wonderful idea Laura,” added Sue, “we’re going to have to remember it going forward for all the grandkids that come along.” _

_ “Well, I’d still like to do something,” said Laura, “you should all stay for lunch. How does everyone feel about pizza?” _

_ “Ooh, yes please,” said Chance, “pizza just goes with occasions like this so well.” _

_ “Alright, I’ll go order. Anyone want anything other than the usual?” _

_ There was a quick murmur to the negative from the room and Laura walked into the kitchen to order. While she was gone, the room’s occupants spent their time playing with the infant. _

_ “Pizza will be here in about an hour,” said Laura, reentering the room as she hung up, “I hope no one’s too hungry yet.” _

_ “I know I’m not,” said Paul, “actually, if we’ve got a bit of time, who’s up for a quick run?” _

_ Everyone perked up at that, nodding enthusiastically. _

_ “Laura, you okay if we head out?” asked Carmilla, “I’d be happy to stay and keep you company.” _

_ “No, go and have fun. I’ll feed Charlie before the pizza shows up and put her down for her nap.” _

_ “Thanks, Babe,” said Danny, “you’re the best.” _

_ “Yeah, I am,” said Laura with a laugh, “have a good run!” _

_ “Will do.” Danny walked out the door, shifting to join the other pack members in the yard.  _

_ Satisfied that everyone was gathered, Paul turned and led the way into the trees at an easy pace. Danny followed closely behind with Carmilla at her shoulder as usual. _

_ The woods, as was often the case this time of year, were breathtaking. A light layer of snow dusted everything, accentuating every tree and shrub. The thin layer of snow on the ground muffled their movement without impeding their forward motion, making their progress wonderfully peaceful. All in all, it was the perfect conditions for a winter run. _

_ They had just begun to get close to lake when Paul barked as they broke into a clearing, calling them a halt. Across the clearing stood a herd of deer, gathered close together and very obviously alarmed by the sudden appearance of a group of very large wolves only a handful of strides away.  _

_ If they had been a hunting pack, such a find would have been a boon, but only being out for a run, these deer served only as an annoying and mildly dangerous obstacle. Noticing the herd was on the edge of panic, Paul gestured for the pack to leave the clearing in hopes of keeping the deer from spooking. His efforts were for naught, however, as even the slight movement from the predators was enough to push the herd’s panic over the edge, making the deer scatter in all directions, including several coming straight towards the pack. _

_ There wasn’t much time to react, so Paul settled for barking loudly in hopes of making any of the incoming deer change their direction away from the threatening noise. While many of the deer heeded the sound, bolting back in the direction they came, a handful still remained barrelling towards them. Most of the pack managed to avoid collisions, but Sue, while managing to dodge one, was hit square in the side by a doe, the two ending up in a heap. The deer quickly recovered, getting up and bolting into the woods, smacking poor Sue with its hooves a few times in the process. _

_ Paul leapt to her side, standing over her as he swept his gaze back and forth, looking for any nearby deer that might still be panicking, or worse, looking for an opportunity to run them off now that one of their own was injured. Luckily, the herd appeared to have completed deserted the clearing. _

_ Satisfied it was safe, he shifted to have a look over his wife. “Sue, stay still. I'm gonna make sure that doe didn't do too much damage,” he said, feeling along her foreleg for injuries. “Hey Danny,” he called, “come give me a hand. Everyone else keep watch, I doubt that herd has any reason to come back here, but I'd rather avoid an encore.” _

_ There were a few yips, and a deep yowl, of agreement as Danny came and knelt behind her mother, feeling down her back. _

_ Several minutes later, Paul breathed a sigh of relief. While there were no few bruises, which Sue had yelped softly at having prodded, there were no signs of breaks or internal injuries. “Come on, let's head back home so we can get you some ice. If you want to shift, I can carry you on my back.” _

_ Sue folded back her ears and glared at him, rolling back to her feet with ease  _

_ “I think that means ‘no’,” said Danny, struggling to hold in her laughter. _

_ Paul returned his wife's glare, opening his mouth to say something before he seemed to change his mind. Sighing with a shake of his head, he returned to his wolf form and led the way back into the trees, setting a sedate walking pace.  _

_ After a couple minutes, he heard an annoyed huff from behind him right before Sue pulled past him, moving into an easy lope. Paul barked in protest as he increased his pace to keep from falling behind.  _

_ With little way to slow her down, Paul settled into the pace, running at her shoulder so he could at least keep an eye on her. She rolled her eyes at that, but was otherwise satisfied by the situation. A few short minutes later, they broke though the tree line, returning to the yard.  _

_ “Well, that was an interesting little venture,” said Sue, stretching to test her range of motion against the aches as she stepped onto the deck. _

_ “Interesting isn't quite how I'd put it,” groused Paul as he walked up the steps behind her, noticing how gingerly she was moving, “why don’t you go sit down on the couch and I’ll get you some ice.” _

_ “Paul, please. I am not made of glass.” _

_ “Please honey, for me?” _

_ “Fine, if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll humour you.” _

_ “Thank you.” _

_ “Hey all,” said Laura, opening the door for them, “you’re back sooner than I expected. I only just got Charlie down. Pizza will still be another twenty minutes, give or take.” _

_ “We had a bit of an incident. You mind if I raid your freezer for some ice for Sue?” _

_ “Oh, of course,” said Laura, scampering over to the fridge, “I’ve actually have a few cold packs on hand. Kinda like to have them on hand for reasons completely unrelated to any klutzy tendencies whatsoever.” _

_ Paul chuckled, placing the cold packs into tea towels and taking them into the living room where Sue had stretched out on the couch. _

_ “Um, so what happened? Does it have anything to do with why Carm didn’t come back with you guys?” asked Laura. _

_ Both Paul and Sue’s heads snapped up, meeting Laura’s gaze. Neither of them, in their focus on each other, had noticed that Carmilla wasn’t with the group when they’d gotten back. They looked at each other, mildly panicking before Danny’s chuckle cut the tension in the room. _

_ “She wheeled off shortly after we left the clearing,” explained Danny, “I think she wanted to investigate something. She’s probably not far behind us “ _

_ “That’s a relief. I’d hate to have misplaced my daughter-in-law,” said Sue, “they’re always in the last place you look.” _

_ “Especially these two,” joked Paul, “small enough to slip under the fridge, between the couch cushions; it’s a never ending search.” _

_ “Oh be quiet you two,” said Danny, as she wandered to the window to check for Carmilla, “can you go back to bickering? That was much more… oh my god, she did not!” Danny stomped her way to the back door, throwing it open and walking out onto the deck, everyone else close behind. “Carmilla Karnstein! I can’t believe you!” _

_ Coming up to the bottom of the stairs was the proudest looking panther any of them had ever seen dragging a dead deer in her jaws. She dropped it at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at the family expectantly. _

_ “I think I’d rather have pizza, thanks,” said Laura, looking down at the deer with amused smirk on her face, “but don’t let me stop you.” _

_ The panther snorted with a laugh before shifting back into a vampire. “Not quite what I had in mind cutie. I was just waiting for some applause,” she joked. _

_ “Is that the same deer?” asked Sue, a concerned look on her face. _

_ “It is,” Carmilla said. _

_ “You didn’t have to do that,” said Sue, “it didn’t mean to run into me, it was just in a panic. I wasn’t even badly hurt.” _

_ “You weren’t, but it was. You’re a much sturdier obstacle than you realize,” said Carmilla, “I think it must’ve to broken its leg when you got tangled. I’m surprised you missed the smell of blood, but I followed it back and found the poor thing collapsed not far from where we found it. I figured a quick death, giving us a freezer of venison, was preferable to letting it suffer and starve.” _

_ “Oh, you made the right call then,” said Sue, “I guess we were just too caught up in our little tussle to notice.” _

_ “Well luckily, I won’t hold that against you two and I’d be happy to share the spoils if you help me clean it,” said Carmilla. _

_ “You have no clue how to dress it, do you?” asked Paul. _

_ “Not a clue,” admitted Carmilla. _

_ The ring of the doorbell interrupted the exchange as Laura headed in to get the pizza. _

_ “Well, I think everyone’s hungry, so let’s eat lunch and then I’ll take you through it.” said Paul. _

_ “I think that sounds great.” _

>->->

“Mama killed a deer?” Mercy asked.

“Yes she did, sweetpea,” said Sue, patting the girl on the shoulder, “sometimes death is a kindness when something is suffering like that.”

“Wow,” said Mercy, “you think she could show me how?”

Sue very nearly choked on the hot chocolate, taken aback by the morbid inquiry of the nine-year-old. “Why do you want to know?”

“The pack hunts sometimes, right?”

Sue nodded.

“So if I know how Mama did it quickly, I can make sure the deer doesn’t hurt much when we catch it.”

Sue smiled, proud of her grandchild’s reflection of her namesake “That’s a good reason to learn that. I’m sure your Mama would be happy to show you.”

Mercy smiled before taking a drink of hot chocolate from her mug.

“Speaking of keeping frail creatures from suffering,” said Danny as she sat down, “how are you feeling?”

“Okay, firstly, refer to me as frail ever again and you’ll be the one who needs to be put out of her suffering,” said Sue, narrowing her eyes at her daughter, “and secondly, I’ll tell you what I always tell your father when he fusses over me. I am not made of glass. I’ll admit if I had that run in with that deer now, I’d probably be a lot worse off, but a fall into a pile of snow isn’t really an issue of the same degree.”

“Alright alright.” Danny put up her hands. “You’re right, I just worry cause I care. I’m sorry.”

“Well if you want to make it up to me, there is one thing you can do.”

“Sure, what is it?”

x-x-x

Danny led the youngsters around the yard at a brisk trot, just quick enough so they could all still easily keep up. All of them, once again, were donning the antlers making the group into their own little sleigh team.

Danny shook her head, still somewhat annoyed by the feel of the headband strapping a pair of antlers to her own head. However, she guessed it was worth it. From the deck, Laura was beaming at her, snapping pictures, and her mom was bringing up the tail of their little team, antlers donning her head as well. All in all, Danny had to admit it wasn’t too bad, with the exception of one little detail.

“Rudolph the red-furred reindeer!” sang Carmilla happily, as she stood in the middle of the yard, recording on her phone.

Danny got a wonderfully awful idea and adjusted her course on her next turn, heading straight for Carmilla. It was time for another one of those unfortunate, deer related, accidents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's number two, based off of 'Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer', thank you Saiori for the suggestion! This was a fusion of ideas that both Jessi and I had. Flashbacks are kinda useful for that, dontcha think?
> 
> Enjoy and let me know what you think!
> 
> Joyeux Noël   
> -Juniper


	28. What a Laugh It Would Have Been

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kirsch volunteers to play Santa for the kids

“Alright kid, we've got one red Santa jacket, one pair of pants with belt, one set of boots, one red hat, one white wig and beard and last, but not least, one ‘Claused Arteries’ fat suit. That everything you ordered?”

Felix had never really struck Aaron as the sort of person who'd run a costume shop. He looked like he'd be more at home running a butcher shop in Brooklyn, but in all the years that Aaron had been coming here with his Dad, Felix had been a smiling fixture at the counter.

“Yep, that's everything,” said Aaron, pulling out a card to pay for the rental.

“Dude, I can pay for this,” said Kirsch, stepping up behind Aaron, “I mean, I'm gonna be the one wearing the thing.”

Aaron handed the card off before Kirsch could protest further. “Kirsch, you're already doing us a favour by doing this after dad threw out his back. We're hardly gonna make you pay for the privilege.”

“You kidding? I totally would have paid to be Santa. If your Dad hadn't been doing it for the kids already, I would've in a second,” Kirsch lamented, “I mean, you can't have two Santas walking around. Total foul for the little ones.”

Aaron chuckled. “Oh yeah, don't want the kids crying on Christmas Eve. I don't think they make ‘Baby’s First Emotionally Shattered Christmas’ ornaments.”

“I could get that if you wanted,” Felix interjected, “my husband makes crafts like that; has a really successful Etsy store. I could give you a discount on the commission, real cheap.”

“Thanks Felix,” said Aaron, “but I think we're trying to avoid that this year.”

“Suit yourself. I'm still giving him the idea so if you change your mind, there should be something in the shop for next year.” Felix fished a business card out of his pocket, handing it to Aaron, who shrugged good-naturedly, slipping the card into his wallet. “Well, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a turkey costume from thanksgiving still that needs repairing. Every year I get at least one bozo who gets too close to an open flame; really method acting the roast turkey experience.”

“Have fun with that,” said Aaron, “see you in a few days when we drop it off. Merry Christmas!”

“And to you two too, have fun.”

“Thanks Dude,” chimed in Kirsch as they left the shop, garment bags in hand. 

Quickly hanging the costume in the rear cab of Kirsch’s truck, the two hopped in and were on their way back to the Maximoff homestead.

“So, who’s going to be joining us tomorrow night?” asked Kirsch as he pulled onto the highway.

“Well, aside from our respective families…” Aaron paused as he thought over the potential guest list, “I think the Hollis and Lafontaine clans are joining us after spending the day on their annual movie marathon and the various Lawrences are up to their own Christmas Eve festivities, as far as I know”

“Don’t D-bear’s family do the santa thing too? Won’t they be going there?” asked Kirsch, a concerned frown crossing his face.

“Yeah, that’s where Dad got the idea actually, but they do theirs on Christmas itself, when their entire family gets together,” explained Aaron, “I’ll actually be going to that too with Drix. It should be fun, Paul and Sue really know how to do the holidays. Oh man, have you ever tasted Sue’s peppermint bark? I swear it’s like the entire holiday experience in one bite.”

“Can’t say I have dude, but sounds like it’ll be a blast” said Kirsch, smiling at Aaron’s wistfulness, “speaking of cooking, do you guys need help with dinner this year with your Dad laid up? Me and Bets are bringing over our usual stuff for dinner —let me say, I think I nailed the sweet potatoes this year, really done my Mom’s recipe proud— but does your Mom need any extra hands in the kitchen?” 

Aaron let out a laugh. “I think me and Mom have it in hand, though really Dad is still gonna be effectively making everything. He’s just not allowed to do anything that puts stress on his back, so Mom and I are gonna be his hands and follow his directions. Mom’s still paranoid about a repeat of the year when she tried to make prime rib, so she’s left the big recipes in his hands ever since.”

“Oh yeah, I’d forgotten about that. I’ve still never seen anyone else ever manage to burn a hole through a roasting pan.

“Dad still has that pan mounted to his office wall. Says it’s a monument to his ‘badass wife’. Mom insists she hates it, but we’re fairly certain she’s secretly proud.”

“Dude, she should be,” Kirsch agreed as he pulled the truck into Aaron’s driveway. Hopping out, the two men grabbed the various bits of santa suit and took them into the house. “So tomorrow, Betty and me will come over about mid-afternoon with all the Kirschlings.”

“Perfect,” said Aaron, “I’ll tuck this into my room. Just slip away while everyone’s cleaning up dinner and then you can make an entrance before any of them really get tired.”

“Awesome,” said Kirsch, turning to head back out, “well, I've got to get going. I promised the kids to help them bake Christmas cookies for tomorrow.”

“Have fun! See you tomorrow Kirsch!”

x-x-x

“Elsie, Hunter, that dinner was amazing,” gushed Betty, slumping back into her seat.

“Hey, it was all my beautiful wife and son this year,” Hunter protested, “I was too busy being an invalid to contribute.”

“Like hell you were,” said Elsie, poking Hunter in the shoulder, “I practically had to threaten to tie him to a chair to get him to rest. Even then, he stayed perched on the kitchens edge, directing traffic like a control tower.”

Aaron caught Kirsch's eye with a ‘told you’ look. Kirsch had to take a sip of his drink to hide the laugh that nearly popped out.

“I’ll let you figure out who deserves credit for what,” said Danny, “but since you all made dinner, it only seems fair that we deal with clean up.” Danny pushed back her chair and began gathering plates. Carmilla made a token resistance, leaning back in her chair and trying to go unnoticed, but quickly started helping under twin glares from her wives.

Kirsch, seeing his opportunity to go change, started gathering plates from around where he was sitting until he was satisfied that he had enough to be helpful, but not so many that Betty would give him a hard time for overloading himself. He didn’t want to draw attention to himself right now. Hefting his load, he fell into step behind Charlie and made his way into the kitchen where Hunter was already directing traffic and showing everyone where things went back.

Kirsch deposited the dishes by the sink where Perry was already working at a feverish pace, passing dishes to the three dryers almost faster than they could manage. Kirsch caught Hunter’s eye, exchanging nods before leaving the kitchen and proceeding to Aaron’s room.

Out on the bed, Aaron had already thoughtfully laid out the various costume pieces, making the order of operations simple for Kirsch. Simple did not translate to easy, however. The fat suit proved to be a larger impediment to the task at hand then he could have anticipated. 

First, getting into the suit itself proved to be easier said than done. The heavy padding made the limbs tight and rigid, resisting his efforts and more than once he had to catch his balance to keep himself from falling onto his back, leaving him trapped like a turtle. 

Once he finally had fat suit in place, he met his next challenge in trying to don the Santa costume overtop. Getting the individual pieces of clothing on was, thankfully, an easier task, but when it came time to put on the wig, beard and hat, the fat suit once again made its presence known as he struggled to get his arms above his head. 

He was in the process of trying to contort his head down to the wig in his hand when there was knock at the door.

“Hey, doing okay in here?” asked Hunter as he poked his head in, “oh nice, you managed to get the suit and clothes on. I've always had to get Elsie to help me squeeze into it.”

“Thanks, but I'm having a bit of trouble with the last step.” Kirsch grinned, holding up the wig.

Hunter took the hairpiece from his hand and set about getting into place over Kirsch's hair and face, leaving him nearly unrecognizable under the white curls.

“Well, you make a pretty convincing Saint Nick,” said Hunter as he pinned the fuzzy hat into place on the wig, “if you'd like to see, there's a mirror in the bathroom, across the hall.”

“Thanks Bro, you're a lifesaver,” said Kirsch.

“No, thank you for doing this. It would have been a shame for the kids to not get to see Santa,” said Hunter, clapping Kirsch on the shoulder, “go have a look at yourself and I'll go get Aaron to bring the sack of gifts to the back door so you have it when you sneak around the front.”

After checking the coast was clear, Kirsch dashed across the hall. Turning on the light, he couldn't believe his eyes. There, in the mirror, was Santa Claus. The only hint that it was Kirsch were his kind blue eyes peering out. Satisfied that he was ready for his debut, he stepped out of the bathroom, into the hall. 

His confident stride was abruptly interrupted when a hand grabbed his wrist, yanking him to one side. Before he knew what was going on, he found an arm around his neck and a pair of lips on his.. Kirsch went wide eyed, realizing it was none other than Elsie who’d pulled him into an embrace. He tried to back away, but her arms were secure around his neck and he only ended up flailing helplessly. From somewhere behind him, he heard the sound of someone clearing their throat, cueing Elsie to finally pull back and open her eyes, which promptly went wide.

“You know if you’re trying to get off the naughty list, that’s not really the way to go about it,” came Hunter’s voice, laced with laughter.

Kirsch turned around to look at Hunter and Aaron, who were standing in the hall, barely containing their laughter. His brow furrowed as he turned back to Elsie.

“Dude, did they not tell you I was taking Hunter’s place?”

Elsie, who was now bright red now, shook her head as she scowled at her family members.

“Mommy? What were you doing to Mister Santa?” said Aaron in a childish falsetto.

Kirsch whipped his head around to glare at them. “Dudes, not cool!”

The two men just kept sniggering as they tried to keep from laughing out loud and drawing the attention of the rest of the house.

Kirsch huffed anxiously, looking at Elsie. “Els, I’m so sorry, I—”

“Kirsch, don’t worry. It’s obviously not your fault,” she said, resting a hand on his shoulder, “and as for you two”—she walked down the hallway to where they stood— “very nicely played, but if you think I’ll let this challenge lie unanswered, I have three words for you think on: ‘chocolate easter bunny’.” She kissed each of them on the cheek before slipping by them with a bounce in her step.

Hunter watched her go with a pensive look on his face. “Son, I believe we may have made a tactical error.”

Aaron just smirked. “Maybe you have, I think this is gonna be fun.”

“You would.” Hunter chuckled.

“Um… what was that?” asked Kirsch.

“We’ll explain another time,” said Aaron, “just a word to the wise, don’t prank my Mom lightly.”

“Kay, that seems smart.”

“Good. Now let’s get this this show on the road,” Hunter said, leading Kirsch back towards the kitchen. 

Aaron scampered ahead to watch for any wayward kids. Making certain the coast was clear, he waved Kirsch and his Dad out the back door where they found a huge red sack sitting on the deck.

“Oh wow, now that is a haul,” exclaimed Kirsch excitedly, getting a hold of the top.

“Now be careful with that,” cautioned Hunter, “moving that monster around is precisely what put me out of commision this year.

“Remember, from the knees with ease,” said Aaron.

“Don’t worry, I got this,” said Kirsch, heaving the sack onto his shoulder.

“I cleared the walking path round front earlier, so it should be easy enough to reach the front door,” added Aaron, gesturing to the snow free concrete.

“Thanks bro. Now, go get all the little dudes,” said Kirsch, before pitching his voice down, “it’s time for a visit from good old Kris Kringle.”

“Good santa voice,” said Hunter, notably impressed.

“Why thank you my good sir,” Kirsch continued, “I decided I should give the children the complete experience, so I spent plenty of time practicing. Now, gather the children!” Kirsch adjusted the sack on his shoulder and started making his way around the house.

He paused momentarily at the windows, making sure no kids would see him and spoil the surprise. As he reached the front door, he took one look over himself to make sure everything was in place before rapping out ‘Jingle Bells’ on the front door.

He smiled when Betty answered, a wide grin on her face as she looked him over.

“Kids!” she called as Kirsch walked into the house and towards the living room, “there’s a special visitor here to see you.”

“Santa!” came the collective cry of joy as Kirsch entered the living room.

“Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, next one's up. This time I used "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" as the basis. Thanks again to Saiori for the suggestion.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!
> 
> Fröhliche Weihnachten!
> 
> -Juniper


	29. Children Laughing; People Passing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas shopping needs to start somewhere

“Mama? Can we get hot chocolate?”

Mercy turned in her seat to look back at Pru. Her face was pressed against the rear passenger window, staring at an ad for hot cocoa in the window of the convenience store that they were stopped in front of as they waited for the light to change.

“Not right now, honey. We’re gonna be late to meet everybody. We’ll get some later after we’ve shopped a bit,” said Mercy, “besides, your Grandmother would disown me if I gave you coffee machine hot chocolate.”

Pru sat back in her seat with an angry pout, meeting Mercy’s gaze with a glare.

It took everything Mercy had not to laugh at the display. “There’s a place with really good hot chocolate near where we’re shopping,” offered Mercy, “it’ll be worth the wait, I promise. Ok?”

The girl’s expression softened. “Ok, Mama.”

“Speaking of,” chimed in Sky, not taking her eyes of the road, “where are we meeting up with the sibs?”

“At the mall downtown. It's fairly easy to get into the parking garage and then we can go out from there.”

“Good plan,” said Sky, “so I'll turn on Eighteenth street, that'll get us over to Thirty-Ninth avenue and that'll take us right to the mall.”

“No no no, there's lights every block going that way,” argued Mercy, “turn right on Twenty-Second and then get onto Union, it hooks around and drops us just a couple blocks from the mall.”

“Are you joking?” said Sky, “that'd take us right through the business district. It'll be crammed with traffic.”

“ _ Moving _ traffic, we'll breeze right through,” countered Mercy

“The only breeze we'll get along your route will be doldrums,” Sky shot back, “my way will be so much clearer.”

“Mom?”

“That's because it's all minor streets. People know not to use it as a thoroughfare. We'll be waiting forever at every major cross,” said Mercy, frustration entering her voice

“Mama?”

“You're assuming we'll hit every red light,” growled Sky, ”this time of day—”

“Moms!” yelled Ash, forcing his way into the argument.

Snapped out of the exchange, Mercy twisted around to look at her son in the back row. “Sorry Ash, what were you trying to say?”

“That we passed both Eighteenth and Twenty-Second about ten blocks ago now, so unless you want to turn around…” He tilted his head sideways with a smug grin.

Mercy glowered a little at the thirteen-year-old for his smart mouth before looking back outside to confirm that they were, indeed, several blocks past either of their preferred routes.

“Well, that was a waste of a good argument,” said Sky.

“I know,” agreed Mercy, “I was winning too.”

“Just keep telling yourself that sweetie,” Sky said as she made a left turn onto another main road.

“Um, where are you going now?” asked Mercy.

“At this point, I’m just gonna zig-zag towards the mall as traffic allows. ‘Six of one’ at this point.”

Mercy nodded reluctantly in agreement and slumped into her seat to wait out the trip.

In the end, they didn’t end up being too badly behind schedule and managed to arrive at the mall only fifteen minutes late. When the doors of the elevator up from the garage opened onto the mall’s main atrium, they quickly spotted the rest of their group patiently waiting for them on the edge of a fountain.

“The prodigal daughters arrive at last!” joked Aaron, his arms wide open.

“Yeah yeah,” said Sky, each of her hands holding one of her daughters’, “we got a little turned around coming up through downtown.”

“Up through downtown?” said Charlie, “you know the freeway lets off just a few blocks to the north of here, right?”

Sky just stared deadpan at Charlie for a moment before visibly shifting her attention away. “Hazel, how are you today?”

“That means ‘no’, in case you were wondering,” said Mercy, chuckling at her wife’s demeanor, “and to be fair, neither did I. We drove from the part of town where my studio is. I rarely come by this part of the city, so I didn’t even consider the possibility.”

“Well, now you know for future,” said Drix, “now let’s stop the finger pointing and get this show on the road. Girls, can you get your gloves and scarves on please? It’s freezing out there.”

“Yes Papa!,” the girls chorused.

“Same with you three,” Charlie echoed to her own children.

“You’re not the boss of me!” said Trystan, a playful grin on his face.

“I’m sorry, what was that mister?” said Hazel, hands on her hips.

“I mean, ‘yes, Mama! Of course!”

“That’s what I thought,” said Hazel, smirking at his antics as she fastened up her own coat.

Once everyone was properly bundled up, they headed through the door and out into the crisp December air. The sun was shining, but it was still bitterly cold. After taking an extra moment to pull coats and scarves a little tighter, the group turned and began making their way up the shopping district that the mall sat upon.

Even this early in the month, the sidewalk was an absolute cacophony of people in the midst of their Christmas shopping. Despite the crowds, however, everyone out seemed to be in good spirits. The season was still young and now was the time when gift shopping was an interesting challenge, rather the panicked rush it would become in a few weeks time. 

Gradually, they picked their way up the street, window shopping as they went. Ash and Trystan walked at the front of their little group, the elder boys discussing something conspiratorially. Levy brought up the rear, wandering dreamily as she kept looking every which way to take in all the sounds and decorations.

For a time, their stop-and-go pace proved slow enough for her to keep up, but inevitably, as she kept spotting some new thing to take her attention, she began to fall behind. Hazel happened to notice and quietly fell back to keep pace with the child, not wanting to disturb her in her revelry.

Levy paused to look at a display in one shop window. The store inside was a simple chocolatier, but the front window had been done up with a whirling contraption of large, white snowflakes covered in sparkles which caught the light as they spun around. Levy was transfixed by the mechanism, her eyes following the paths of the individual snowflakes as they raced around each other.

“Trying to figure out how it works?” asked Hazel softly, trying not to startle her niece.

“No… well, sort of, I suppose. It's pretty easy, you can see the wheels and gears.” The girl pointed to the armatures connecting the snowflakes to their motor. “I really just like how it looks. It's beautiful.”

“That it is,” agreed Hazel, “if you'd like, we could make something like it at home.”

“Yeah?”

“Sure. The basic parts don't look like they'd be expensive. We could put it together and then you could decorate it however you'd like. Doesn't have to be snow either, could be leaves or, ooh, molecules.”

“You'd really help me do that?”

“Heck yeah, I would. I don't get too meddle with mechanics to much in the bio lab. This sounds like fun.”

“Great! Thanks, Auntie Hazel.” Levy threw her arms around Hazel's middle, hugging her tight.

Hazel wrapped her arms around Levy’s shoulders. “No problem, kiddo.”

The ringing of Hazel's phone cut into the moment like a sharp knife. Hazel chuckled, giving Levy one last squeeze before answering the phone, seeing Drix on the call ID. 

“Hey Drix, what's up?”

_ “Hazel, where are you? Is Levy with you?”  _

Even over the phone, Hazel could easily hear the worry in his voice.

“Yes, Levy is with me. I hung back so she could look around without rushing.”

_ “Thank goodness. Thank you Hazel.” _

“No worries. We're just outside the chocolate shop with the snowflake display near…” Hazel looked around for a landmark. “...the Santa playing saxophone.” Hazel grinned at the performer on the corner just ahead of them, working through a jazzy edition of Good King Wenceslas.

_ “Oh wow, you two really fell behind. We’re about a block and a half ahead of you. We've found a toy store that we're all heading into.” _

“A toy store you say,” repeated Hazel, loud enough for Levy to hear as she gestured with her head that they should get moving. Levy nodded excitedly and took Hazel's free hand, walking with a spring in her step. “We'll be along shortly. See you soon, Drix.”

_ “You too, Haze.” _

Catching up to the group only took a couple minutes now that they were walking with purpose. They found Drix waiting for them outside the toy store, a look of relief on his face once he spotted them.

“There you two are, I was worried sick,” he said, opening the door for them.

“Sorry Papa, I didn't mean to make you worry,” said Levy, “I could see Auntie Hazel so I thought I was fine.”

“No need to apologize Sweetpea. I should have waited for you,” he said, ruffling her hair.

“Papa!” she laughed, swatting at his hands before running out of reach and into the aisles.

“Ok, who's watching who?” Hazel lowered her voice so only Drix could hear her. 

“Aside from Levy, I think everyone is covered. Charlie is with Ash and Trystan over in board games. Aaron trailed off after Arsen and Jaq. I can see Pru from here, looking at the Lego. Marcella went in the same direction, probably up by the science stuff. Sky’s somewhere over there and I think and Mercy is with Serena, though I don't know where.”

“Alright, why don't I go after Levy, see what she's looking at, and you can stay here with Pru,” suggested Hazel.

“Sure.” He smiled at Hazel as she disappeared into the aisles after Levy. Walking over to Pru, he noticed Sky down the aisle a ways, looking back and forth frantically, trying to keep track of what was piquing both children's interest at the opposite ends of the section. Drix caught her attention, gesturing to her daughter with a nod. With a look of thanks, she turned on her heel and walked over to Marcella, who was examining what appeared to be some sort of crystal kit.

“Anything good?” he asked his niece.

“It's Lego, it's all good,” she said firmly.

“Well, that's a good point,” agreed Drix, “what sort do you usually use?”

“All of it,” she said, “it’s more fun that way. I can take this one”—she pointed to a black boxed space set—”and this one”—a purple boxed juice bar set—”and then make them into a boat.”

“Really?”

“I dunno, maybe. Trying is the fun part.”

Drix grinned, immensely proud of his niece. Not to mention it made at least one Christmas list very easy.

Eventually, Pru grew bored of browsing the Lego and wandered off, her uncle in tow, to see what her cousins and siblings had gotten themselves up to. In the very next aisle, they found Serena looking at a small set of kids cookware. Mercy stood just a couple feet behind her, contemplating the girl's inspection.

Pru immediately bounced up to her cousin and began immediately talking about the potential things Serena could make with the tools. Serena nodded along, adding possible suggestions for projects.

“Something else for the tree?” Drix asked Mercy quietly.

“I think so. She spent the last five minutes studying it, like she's had an epiphany about cooking. Looks like Pru is making the final sell too. I'll add it to the list.”

“I'll talk to Aaron to see if it's a decent kit, no point starting her off on the wrong foot. If not, he can help us find, or make, a good one.”

“Ooh, good idea,” said Mercy before addressing the girls, “alright kiddos, we should get moving. Anything else you wanted to look at in here?”

A couple of shaking heads answered her and they made their way up front. Waiting by the door was Aaron, looking rather frazzled, while Jaq and Arsen seemed to be arguing about something quietly next to him. 

Drix wrapped an arm around his husband, pulling him close. “What happened to you?”

“These two found the trading cards. Of course, she went straight for the hockey cards and he went looking for the soccer ones. Then, as per usual...”

Drix chuckled. This was something that happened a lot between the two kids. They each loved their sport but they seemed to love to argue about which one was better even more. “Well, they kept it down this time, so good work.”

“I managed to corral them away from the cards, which seemed to calm them but they've been like this ever since.”

“Eh, they seem to enjoy it,” Drix commented, noticing their smiles, “as long as they keep it down, I see no reason to stop them.”

Aaron hummed in agreement and rested his head on Drix's shoulder to enjoy the moment while they waited.

Before long, the rest of the family trickled up to the front of the store and the group made their way back out into the sunshine. 

“God it's cold out here,” exclaimed Charlie, wrapping her scarf around her face, “I think it's about time for some hot chocolate. Who's in?”

A series of affirmatives, both young and old, answered her and she turned and led the way off the main shopping road and down a side street to a small coffee shop inside an old character house. The small group shuffled inside, shutting the door behind them against the freezing cold.

“Hello! How can I help you today?” chirped the man behind the counter. 

“We got a big one for you,” said Charlie as, behind her, the other adults worked at getting the kids settled, “we need fourteen of your signature hot chocolates.”

“I always knew this day would come,” he said dramatically before turning to the doors to the back room, “hey Meghan! I've got a shoppers’ special up here, can you give me a hand?”

A girl skipped out of the back, moving up to the espresso machine. “What we got Carlos?”

“Fourteen signatures for these shopsicles over here.”

“Oh wow, you folks don't do things by halves, do you?” she commented, looking at the group filling the small space. 

“Now where would be the fun in that,” countered Charlie.

The woman shrugged good-naturedly and set about steaming milk for the hot chocolates as her co-worker got out the chocolate shavings to load into each cup. Charlie returned to the group and helped get the kids set up at their own table before sitting down along with the rest of the adults at the next table over, to wait for the warm drinks.

“So, how are things looking for everybody?” said Mercy. 

“Well, I think our last stop was highly productive,” said Hazel, “assuming everyone got the sort of input I did, this year should be a simple matter for them.” She only gestured towards the kids with her eyes, trying not to give away three subject of their conversation.

There were a series of nods of agreement around the table before Charlie spoke up. “Anyone manage to find anything for anyone else? I am having the worst time thinking of something for Moms and I would love some ideas.”

“I noticed a neat video recording lens at that camera shop we passed,” noted Sky, “Auntie Laura would love something like that for her projects.”

“I know Mama's been trying her hand at baking,” said Mercy, “a baking book or some good quality tools would not be inappropriate.”

“Ooh, I'll let Mom know too,” said Sky, “she could give Auntie Carm some lessons for Christmas.”

“That could be a good idea or a bad idea depending on Mama's mood on any given day,” said Mercy, “but worth mentioning anyways.”

“I noticed Aunt Danny's Wings jersey is starting to get worn out,” said Aaron, “a new one to replace it or a shadow box to retire it would probably be appreciated, or both if you guys coordinate.”

“Damn, you're smart. I knew there was a reason I married you,” said Drix.

“Oh and here I thought it was for my stunning good looks,” said Aaron.

Drix hesitated with a mischievous smirk on his face. “…sure…”

“Hey!” whined Aaron.

Drix wrapped an arm around him and pressed a kiss to his temple. “Oh you know I'm joking. You're gorgeous and you know it.”

Aaron held his pout for about five more seconds before breaking into laughter. “Yeah, I am.”

The rest of the table rolled their eyes, Mercy going so far as to mime a gag. The two men just laughed and cuddled closer.

“Does anyone have anything else they're wanting to go see?” asked Hazel, “or are we ready to start heading back after this?”

“Let's start heading back,” said Mercy, “The sugar will give the kids a bit more energy, but it'll take about an hour to pick our way back. Serena's already flagging and the others probably aren't far behind.”

“Sounds good, I—” Hazel was interrupted by the arrival of their drinks, served in tall mugs and topped with chocolate whipped cream and chocolate shavings. The kids, many squealing in delight, quickly set upon the rich treat. 

“So what do you think Pru? Worth the wait?” asked Mercy, already sure of the answer.

“Yes yes yes! Thank you Auntie Charlie!” exclaimed Pru, the rest of the kids echoing their thanks.

“You're welcome!” said Charlie, before raising her mug, “here's to a successful trip and a Merry Christmas.”

“Hear hear!” said Drix. 

“Merry Christmas!” echoed everyone at the table. 

“God bless us, everyone,” added Aaron with a smirk. 

“Quiet you,” said Charlie before putting her mug to her lips and taking a sip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's the last one of the month! I decided to post it early for the 25th.
> 
> Our final entry is based on Silver Bells and a prompt suggested to me by Jessi of the kids and grandkids going on a pre-Christmas idea trip.
> 
> Hope you guys liked my little experiment this month and as always, I'd love to know what you guys think. 
> 
> Merry Christmas!
> 
> -Juniper


	30. What to Respect When You’re Expecting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura, being Laura, vlogs her pregnancy for posterity

Laura eased herself back into the couch cushions with a groan, cradling her swollen belly as she settled back.

“Pregnancy is for the birds,” she complained to her laptop, as she perched it on the swell of her stomach, the red light blinking as it faithfully captured footage, as it had done for years like its many forebears. “Hello Charlie! Welcome to—”

The laptop jumped and fell off her belly onto the couch cushions.

“Alright,” said Laura, rubbing the tender spot where she’d just been brutalized from the inside out, “I guess that’s baby for ‘don’t use me as a table’.” Laura picked up the laptop and set it on the coffee table, checking to make sure it was still recording.

“Ahem, welcome to week thirty-three of you,” Laura said, pointing to her belly, “yep, here I am, thirty-three weeks along and I am going bored out of my mind.” Laura’s head flopped back against the cushions.

“Last week, a couple days after we last spoke, I finally ran out of excuses to not start my maternity leave. I'd been managing to hold on another week while I was finishing up my exposé on the governor's office. I'm quite proud of it actually, really nails him to the wall; too bad you'll have no clue who he is by the time you're old enough to watch this.

“Anyways, no sooner had I submitted to my editor then it was ‘thanks for your hard work, have a good leave, see you when you get back’ before being ushered into the break room for a send off with balloons and cake. Not that the lacklustre, grocery store sheet cake really deserved to be called ‘cake’ in my personal opinion, but it’s the thought that counts, I suppose.” Laura crossed her arms resignedly, blowing a lock of hair from in front of her face. 

“I snuck away pretty quickly and tried to get another assignment; just something to kill another few days, nothing big; but my editor just told me to head on home to ‘start getting ready for that bundle of joy’.” Laura looked at the camera with a deadpan expression before her expression softened as she rubbed her stomach. ”I mean, don’t get me wrong, you are going to bring us so much joy, but I’m  _ already _ ready for you. I’m so done with being pregnant, I want baby time! I don’t care about lost sleep, I just want you to come out and meet all of us.” 

She poked her baby bump, feeling the little one push back a little. She smiled before what felt like a kick to her stomach reminded her that not all the little movements were cute. 

“Alright, alright, I can wait; take your time. Jeez, we’re going to be visiting the principal’s office for you fighting a lot, aren’t we? I wonder how early you can get kids interested in meditative yoga.” She looked back at the camera. “Let me know when you watch this how successful I was with that. 

“Alright so, there really wasn’t much else to do and I knew if I hung around idly much longer, Jeana would come by and try to dispense more baby advice she’d found online.” Laura bit her lip with a guilty expression on the face. “She means well, really, but I don’t believe for a second that ice baths are good for newborns. At least she stopped trying to rub my belly every day. I think your Mama may have terrified her into stopping when she came by last month to take me to lunch. I really shouldn’t condone that, but I can’t really argue with the results. Why people get so touchy with pregnant women is beyond me. I’m actually kind of worried what’s going to happen when your Mama is pregnant like we planned. Someone is going to try to rub her and pull away a bloody stump.

“So, I dodged Jeana and headed home to start dinner. It was my night to cook and I was actually pretty excited for once as I’d quietly copied a tasty looking mulligatawny soup recipe that had been submitted to the paper’s lifestyle section and made off with it. I’d had all the ingredients at home and I figured I could have dinner ready in about an hour, more than fast enough to have ready for when Danny got home and not to mention a little easier on the feet.

“Did I mention that’s another reason I’d love to have you on this side of the womb? The sooner my feet stop doing this”—she held up her angrily swollen foot in front of the camera—”the happier I’ll be. Any chance of you popping out as a favour to your mom?”

Another kick, fortunately away from any sensitive spots this time, was the answer she got.

“...fine. So, I get home to find both of your mothers already there, with dinner already made. Now, I can’t claim that I was all that disappointed since they wanted to celebrate the start of my leave and your Mom cooked steaks. As you”—she pointed at her bump—”will learn one day and you”—she pointed to the camera—”probably know, your Mom grills a mean steak. Cooks it perfectly every single time, even if she does eat her own steaks blue.” Laura made a face and stuck out her tongue in disgust.

“So, gentle viewer”—there was another kick to her abdomen—”alright, violent viewer, you are probably wondering what this has to do with anything, seems like a pleasant thing to come home to right? Right. However, the rest of the week has proceeded pretty much in the same fashion. 

“It seems like no matter which way I turn, either Danny or Carmilla are ready with whatever I need, whether I want them to or not. Now don’t get me wrong, neither of them are trying to stop me from doing anything for fear I might get hurt or something. That way? That way be monsters and they know it, but their efforts to be helpful are pretty much resulting in the same effect anyways. 

“Admittedly, the bi-hourly foot massages are pretty nice, as is always waking up covered in a blanket whenever I fall asleep on the couch, which is almost every afternoon now, but everything —every chore, every job, every obstacle— is taken care of before I can deal with it. It’s kinda making me feel like I’m living in a cocoon, which is ironic given that  _ I’m _ supposed to be the cocoon at the moment.” Laura placed her hands on the belly as she looked directly at the camera with an exasperated expression.

“I don’t think they’ve realized that they’ve completely insulated me from everything. They’re just being helpful and taking care of things, so it makes me feel kinda guilty to be irritated about it. I can’t help it though, I need to be helpful, it’s who I am. Not to mention that I’m running out of things to watch on Netflix and there is only so much prenatal yoga one can do to fill up a day.

“I thought I had an opportunity today. Your Mom is at work all day and I was able to coax your Mama to go out and get us some groceries. It wasn’t very hard either, they’ve been spending so much time doting on me that our fridge and pantry have been drained to the dregs. I think Carm’s blood supply is on its last legs too; the open blood bag in the fridge is AB positive, which is her least favourite. She insists it tastes musty compared to other blood, though I just take her word on that. She left about a couple hours ago and the moment I heard the car leave the driveway, I sprung right into action.”

Laura attempted to get up to punctuate her statement, but apparently forgot to account for her cargo and ended up flopping back down before her butt had even left the seat. Said cargo kicked her again at the disturbance.

“Okay fine,” she said, rubbing her ribs where the blow had landed, “I waddled into action. I hauled out the vacuum and gave the house a pass through. Admittedly, maneuvering the vacuum around you while going up the stairs was a little interesting, but dammit I was gonna be useful, come hell or hogwarts. I even dusted the nursery a little while I was in there and only lost ten, maybe fifteen minutes looking around, smiling dopily. I swear. 

“Once I wrestled the vacuum back into its closet, my plan had been to clean the kitchen. I got out the cleaners, got the mop and bucket…” Laura counted the steps off on her fingers, “...and promptly took a seat at the table because I was exhausted. Funny how doctors seem to know what they’re talking about when they say you’ll have less energy from spending the rest of it making a freaking baby from scratch.” Laura huffed before looking back at the camera.

“Which leads us back to here. A kitchen full of unused cleaning supplies, a house only half as clean as I intended it to be and now, due to my brilliant plan, no one around to talk to.” Laura winced at a jab somewhere around her kidneys. She looked down to glare at her stomach. “Look, I know you’re here to talk  _ at, _ but conversation via a series of kicks and punches is not exactly what I’d call riveting discourse. Though I will admit, I am glad it was about time to make another vlog for you…” Laura looked back and forth between her bump and the camera, trying to decide which to address, before settling on the camera,” you, because as interesting as bingeing House of Cards is, I don’t think I’m up to watching it for a fourth time.”

“Now, I suppose I should go put away the cleaners,” she said, pouting at the prospect of having to get up again, “right now it looks like I’m passive-aggressively telling your moms to clean the house.”

“Nah, I kinda figured out what was going on,” said Carmilla from the doorway, making Laura jump, “now if you’d dug out the old chore wheel, then I might have taken issue and made a concerted effort to ignore it completely.”

“Carm? How long have you been standing there?”

“Since your rather accurate idea of maiming people who try to touch me.”

Laura buried her head in her hands. “So you’ve had a front row seat to me complaining about how you’ve been making my life miserable for the past week.”

“Yes, but considering every article we read indicated you’d be Mom-zilla at this point, I’d say being mildly irritated at being accidentally made a kept woman is getting off lightly.”

“I yelled at you last night for leaving muddy paw prints,” said Laura, “in the mud room.”

“And then immediately apologized,” Carmilla countered as she took a seat beside Laura on the couch, “truly, you’re a terror in maternity wear.”

Laura narrowed her eyes at her wife, but said nothing and opted to snuggle herself under Carmilla’s arm instead. “So, for pregnancy week thirty-three, do you have any anecdotes or tidbits for our daughter?” Laura asked, nodding to the laptop.

“Sure. Kid, I can’t wait to see you. You are gonna be the best thing that ever happened to us.”

“Carm, you say that every week,” Laura said softly.

“Doesn’t make it any less true, but fine,” she conceded, “one thing I really hope is that your palate changes once you’re out here. These late night cravings for roasted garlic and pesto pizza are a little hard to take. The smell aside, I don’t like not being able to cuddle my wife in bed. It’s a pain for everyone involved, right Cupcake?”

Only soft, steady breathing answered her.

“Laura?” asked Carmilla, looking down to find her wife fast asleep against her. She chuckled before looking at the camera, “well, I guess asking her to try to make that soup tonight is out. Too bad, that sounded tasty. I haven’t had a good mulligatawny since my last time in London, back in the eighties.

“I guess that’s it for this week kid. See you on the outside. I love you.”

Carmilla reached out with her toe, trying not to disturb Laura, and hit a button on the keyboard, ending the recording.

x-x-x

“Love you too, Mama” said Charlie, leaning back as the screen cut to black, instinctively resting her hand on her own swollen belly.

“Wow you were ornery,” said Hazel, “Trystan kicked a bit, but he never did anything that made me wince like your mom did.”

“It must be genetic,” grumbled Charlie, “cause this one certainly seems to have the fighting spirit. I think she’s actually using my bladder as a speed bag.”

“Well, look at it this way,” said Hazel, “she’ll keep her siblings as safe as you did when you were little.”

“Good point, though it probably means we’ll have at least a few principal’s office visits of our own.”

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. Maybe we can get her into taekwondo early and nip it in the bud.”

“Oh, good idea. I wonder if Sandra has a kid she could kick the butt of.”

“You’re never gonna let that go, are you?”

“What? A rivalry where we don’t actually hate each other? Hell no. ‘My kid can beat up your kid’ is just the natural progression. Maybe that’ll be my Christmas card message this year,” Charlie rubbed her chin, going off in thought.

“Well, you can think it over while we clean the house,” Hazel said getting up before offering her wife a hand.

“Cleaning? But I’m just so tired and pregnant,” said Charlie plaintively.

“Not to worry my love,” said Hazel dramatically, “I am in tune with you enough to realize that you are no delicate flower that needs to be coddled. Even pregnant, you, like your mother, are more than capable of still taking care of business.”

“I never should have let you watch that video with me.”

“Maybe not, but too late now. If we both work, we’ll be done quickly and I’ll handle anything that requires bending over or the like. Now which do you want: vacuuming or mopping?”

Charlie pouted at her wife before turning to the hall closet. “Vacuuming, but I expect a foot massage when we’re done.”

“Done and done,” laughed Hazel before going to find the pail.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this one is a bit dense, I guess that's what happens when the chapter you write is mostly monologue. 
> 
> Let me know what you think and I'm always open for ideas for future chapters, either here or you can come by my tumblr cheezwhiz-cupcake.
> 
> -Juniper


	31. Open Door Policy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because the number of guests is not necessarily fixed...

**** “Knock, knock!” called Paul as he came through the front door.

“Grandpa!” Charlie bounded over to her grandfather. 

Scooping her up into his arms, Paul easily lifted the young woman into a bear hug.“Hey Kiddo!” he said, setting her back down, “Your mom around?”

“Sorry Gramps, you just missed them” said Drix as he walked up to give his grandfather a hug, “they’ve gone out for the night.”

“Ah nuts. Just you kids here then?”

“Nah,” said Charlie, “Hazel and Sky came over and Auntie Perry and Laf decided to tag along to make a family night of it.”

Paul nudged his granddaughter in the ribs, “grownups ruining a good home alone night?”

Charlie side-eyed him with smirk, “I’m not quite sure what you think you’re suggesting, but no, we’ve been having fun.”

“Aw, seriously?!” yelled Mercy from the living room.

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” replied Perry’s voice in a tone that implied that she wasn’t sorry in the slightest.

“We’re playing Mario-kart,” added Drix nonchalantly, before wandering back to the other room.

“You should join us,” suggested Charlie, “it’s looking like we’re really gonna make a night of it. We’ve got snacks and some of Aunt Perry’s baking and we’ve been talking about getting chinese for dinner later. We’ll give Grandma Sue a call and have her come over.”

“Well,” said Paul, “I think that sounds like the best offer I’ve heard all week. Count me in.” With a smile he followed Charlie back towards the living room.

“—no, don’t worry about bringing anything, we’re already pretty well set up. Love you too Grandma, see you soon.” Hendrix ended the call and gave his Grandfather a thumbs up.

“I worry that I’ve become so predictable that you were able to call her before I was even given the invitation to stay,” Paul observed with a smile.

“I’m sorry, are you new to this family?” countered Drix, “since when have any of us been able to resist a get together?”

“Fair point.”

Ruffling the young man’s hair, Paul grabbed a cookie from a plate on the table and wandered into the living room where the remaining four occupants of the house were enjoying their game, albeit a little less civilly.

“You little brat,” cried Perry, “you were just waiting to get within sight of the finish to hit me.”

“When last we met, I was but the student. Now I am the master,” intoned Sky, pitching her voice down.

“I’m so proud of you,” said Laf, before looking up at the newcomer, “hey Paul, glad you could join us. You want next game? I've spent most of the time going off the edges, maybe you can avenge me.” They held out their controller, gesturing to an open seat next to them.”

Taking the controller, Paul plopped himself down. “Well, I suppose I could give it a whirl.”

x-x-x

“Ruth, come on,” coaxed Scout, “the blood bank won't be open til morning.”

Ruth met her beloved’s gaze, trying to steel herself against the yearning expression, “I've already told you, I'm fine. I can make through the night.”

“Can you? Yes,” interjected Ava, drawing Ruth's attention to the back seat, “but should you? Why do that to yourself?” Ava reached forward, cupping Ruth's cheek. “Sweetie, you're hungry. We hate to see you uncomfortable like this and Carmilla and Hendrix have always been happy to share.”

“And I'll protect you if she tries to tease you about running out,” Scout added, “or at least get Danny to.”

Ruth pursed her lips as she resisted the idea for another couple seconds before frowning and opening the car door. “Ugh, fine.”

Her girlfriends smiled and quickly hopped out after her.

“Hi Girls!”

The three of them turned around to see Sue walking up the drive.

“Did the kids invite you over too?

“No, we were just— invite us to what?” asked Ruth, looking slightly hurt.

“Nothing planned, don’t worry,” assured Sue, “come on in. I have a sneaking suspicion that you’ll be very welcome to join.”

Leading the women to the front door, Sue opened it to the sound of Mercy’s exasperated voice.

“Grandpa, how could you do that?!”

“Jeez Merc, that’s kinda the point of the game. You’ve nailed everyone else plenty,” Charlie chastised her sister.

“No, I mean how did you do that? Your aim was perfect,” Mercy said, clearly impressed.

“These games have been around since your parents were children,” said Paul, “I’ve been practicing that shot against every child, niece, nephew and grandchild that’s asked me to come play.”

“And with luck, you’ll be able to practice it on great-grandchildren as well,” said Sue, entering the room and giving her grandchildren a knowing look. All three turned beet red while Sky proceeded to drape herself over her girlfriend.

“All in good time Gran,” she said, giving Mercy a peck on the cheek before looking past Sue to the other new arrivals, “hey guys, what brings you by?”

Ruth opened her mouth before closing it again, looking chagrined. Ava wrapped an arm around her before answering, “I don’t suppose you could spare a cup of blood,” she asked, directing her attention towards Drix.

“I may have… run out,” admitted Ruth.

“Ugh, I’ve done that,” said Drix, “more than once. With two hungry vampires in the house, the blood supply isn't what you'd call predictable. You always feel like climbing the walls till you can run out to get more.”

“Literally,” said Mercy, “grandpa Rafael has come fix clawed up drywall on more than one occasion.”

“Rafael knows how to fix drywall?” asked Ruth, impressed.

“Yes… well, no… well, kinda?” Mercy frowned as she tried to think of a way to explain.

“One of his usual people is our handyman,” Charlie supplied, “whenever we need something fixed, grandpa is usually along for the ride, even after we learned about him. I’m not entirely sure why since he can come over whenever he likes now.”

“I suppose I just like to feel like I’m helping out my family,” Rafael interjected from the corner of the room, making everyone start at his sudden appearance.

Mercy was the first to recover and walked over to hug the spectre, “ _ Hallo Opa _ , it’s good to see you.”

“It is wonderful to see you too,  _ Liebling _ ,” he said, wrapping his arms around her.

“So,” Hazel said with a smirk, “just how long were you waiting around to make a dramatic entrance?”

“Not long,” chuckled Rafael, “I was following these three so I could try and arrange for someone to open the blood bank for them, if they tried it.”

“That’s so sweet Raf,” fawned Scout, “thank you so much, even if we ended up here.”

“You’re family, no thanks needed,” he said, “besides, I like your plan better.”

“Speaking of,” interjected Drix as he got up, “Ruth? Warm or cold?”

“Cold please.”

“Excellent, that’s so much easier,” he said, prompting snickers from everyone as he went into the kitchen, “what? Heating blood takes forever and it almost always congeals if you try to microwave it.”

Ruth made a face, “I tried that when they first invented the things. I took the thing for just a smallish oven and put my cup in for five minutes; my blood turned into a solid mass. Few things are more off-putting than having to eat blood with a knife and fork.”

“Bleh!” said Drix, returning with two glasses, “well, you're not missing anything. No matter how careful I am, it always ends up a slurry. I pretty much gave up on that venture a few years ago. Mama still tries though, she hates waiting for the double boiler.”

“So do I, which is why I do the sane thing and just drink it cold,” said Ruth, taking a generous gulp to punctuate her statement, “oh, that feels so much better already.”

“Told ya,” Ava sing-songed.

“Ava, hush,” scolded Scout.

“You're no fun.” Ava pouted.

“Oh, you know that I am plenty of fun,” rebutted Scout, a lascivious grin on her face.

“That's debatable,” joked Ava. Scout scrunched her face up at the remark before turning on her heel and stalking into the kitchen. ”Oops, I made her angry. Ruth? Fix it for me?” Ava Regan looked at her girlfriend with the best puppy dog eyes she could manage. 

Ruth met her gaze over the rim of her glass as she took a sip. “Sorry Pup,” she said, setting her glass down with a smirk, “you're on your own. Maybe try those puppy eyes on her. I was very nearly convinced to get up.”

“C'mon, pleeeeeaase?” Ava’s eyes, impossibly, got even wider. 

“Nnng, fine. But only cause you asked nicely.” Ruth stood up and headed for the kitchen, Ava closely in tow.

“We’re gonna need to turn a hose on them at some point, aren't we?” joked Laf as they watched the women leave the room. 

“Knowing them? probably,” mused Mercy, “though maybe we can head off the problem at the pass. Is anyone else hungry enough to think about dinner yet?” A handful of casual head nods answered her question. “Excellent, so how many people do we need to order for?” She started counting on her fingers. “Nine, Ten, Eleven—”

“Hello!” called Elsie from the front entrance.

“...twenty-two, twenty-three,” Mercy continued, her shoulders shaking with laughter.

“Come on in” Charlie called back.

“What’s going on here?” asked Elsie as she came in with Hunter in tow, “you got a party going and didn’t invite me?”

“Nah, it’s not really a party. I'd call it a shindig, really,” said Drix.

“More of a hootenanny,” countered Hazel.

“Aren’t we short a jug band for that?”

“You’re thinking of a hoe-down.”

“Ah, my mistake.”

Elsie stared deadpan at the kids, who just simply returned her expression with goofy smiles. “Alright, once again to the grownups,” she said, looking around for her peers.

“Just an impromptu gathering,” said Perry, gesturing around with her controller, “I don’t think anyone would object if I said you’re welcome to stick around.”

“I may do just that, but first I need to talk to Laura about the work-study she’s hosting for some of the school newspaper kids. Where is she?” asked Elsie.

“Out. It’s date night.”

“So they asked you to babysit?” Elsie joked, the kids’ smiles scrunching into scowls.

“Yup, Carmilla pays real well to keep her babies safe,” said Laf, drawing their collective ire, “I’m buying a new centrifuge with the proceeds. Perry’s getting a new stand-mixer.”

“I dunno, still doesn’t seem enough for these three hooligans,” added Hunter.

“Well, they’re family, so we give them a discount,” said Perry, sharing a wink with Sky.

“You’re nicer than we are,” said Sue, “we charge double. Helps cover the marks” The room filled with laughter

“So anyways,” cut in Charlie, “you two want to stay for dinner? We were about to order chinese.”

“That sounds great, though we have to go get the rest of the family first,” said Hunter, “they’re waiting for us at home.”

“Correction,  _ were  _ waiting for you at home,” said Drix, holding up his phone, “Aaron loaded them up about two minutes ago and is on his way.

Elsie looked at Drix, puzzled, “But how did—”

“Just accept it. The boy is just on top of these things,” said Paul.

“Well, that and I’d been trying to get him to bring everyone over since Grandma and Grandpa got here,” said Drix, “he was waiting for you two, but since you so kindly brought yourselves here, it’s made things that much easier.”

“Well, in that case,” said Elsie, “I’ve got next game!” She vaulted herself over the back of the couch, landing beside Perry with a thump. “Time for the principal to take you all to school!”

Perry and Sky shared a smirk. “I’m sure you have much to teach us,” said Perry.

“I’ll just go order,” said Mercy, trying not to laugh at the women’s predatory grins, “and I think I’ll get extra. At this rate, we’ll need plenty more before this evening ends.”

x-x-x

“Alright, I feel like going out for burgers tonight,” said Zach, poking his head into the TV room, “how does everyone like that idea?” Both Xavier and Gillian perked up with huge grins, confirming his suspicion that they would not mind that scenario in the slightest. “Alright, go and get ready, we’ll head out in about five minutes.”

The kids bolted past him and up the stairs. He chuckled as he ascended back to the main floor to the living room where Elizabeth was watching a show of her own.

“I take it from the stampede that just flew by that the kids liked the burger idea,” she said, turning off the wall-mounted TV and going to grab her things.

Soon enough, the family of four had piled into the car and were on their way to a diner in town they all liked. However, just a couple of minutes into the drive, Zach notably perked up, his head snapping over to look out the window.

“Hey honey? Take the next right.”

Elizabeth chanced a glance at her husband before returning her eyes to the road. “Right? The diner is straight ahead in town.”

“I know, but I think we’ll have ourselves a better time if you take that right. Trust me on this.”

“Alright,” she conceded, turning on the signal and following Zach’s directions to a very familiar house. “Danny’s? Why did we come here?”

“Just a feeling.” Zach winked. “C’mon, let’s head inside.”

The family quickly made their way up the front walk and entered the house.

“Knock knock,” he called into the house.

“Ha! Called it!” came Mercy’s voice from somewhere ahead.

“There’s take-out in the kitchen,” called Perry, “fix yourselves a plate and come join us in the living room.”

“Huh, not bad, Love,” admitted Elizabeth as she shed her coat and shoes and moved into the house, followed closely by her family.

The smell of the take-out was mouth watering to the hungry family and soon they each had a plate piled high with noodles, meats, vegetable and, of course, a spring roll. Their food in hand, they made their way into the living room where they found every seat, and much of the floor, taken up by people eating.

“Hi guys,” said Laf around a mouthful of chow mein, “take a seat… somewhere…” They gestured vaguely, having no clue where such a location existed at the moment, “though just so you know, whichever one you’re looking for, they’re not here.”

“Who?” Zach asked them, “Danny? Isn't tonight their date night?”

“Now how did you know that and I didn't?” asked Paul, looking slightly annoyed.

Zach chuckled. “I just met Danny for coffee on campus yesterday. She was excited cause Carmilla had discovered some new club where they could go dancing.”

“Oh yeah,” said Charlie, “I remember Mama mentioning that. I suspect they won't be back until late.”

“Well, they deserve some fun,” said Sue, resting her now empty plate on her lap. 

“And so do we,” chimed in Scout, “who's up for a post dinner run?”

“Ogh!” exclaimed Ruth, nearly choking on a mouthful of food. With a cough, she swallowed her food and looked around sheepishly. “Sorry.  Hell yes, let’s go for a run. I’ve got fuel in the tank and I'm ready to go.”

A series of nods around the room agreed with the sentiment and everyone started eating faster, eager to get out into the woods. 

As they finished up, most of the wolves in the room got up and began gathering plates, sweeping into the kitchen to start dishes.

“Alright all of you, shoo,” said Perry, chasing Zach and Ava away from the sink, “you go have fun. These dishes… are mine.” Perry's expression approached something one might call manic delight that foretold doom for any bit of grease that might cross her path.

“Is Ms. Perry always this scary when she cleans?” Gillian quietly asked Laf as they worked at packing up the leftovers. 

“Yeah,” said LaFontaine, “it's awesome. Don't worry, you'll get used to it.”

“Well, I got used to being adopted by a pack of werewolves,” she replied with a wink, “this shouldn't be a stretch.”

“That's the spirit,” they said, “just keep to one side when she's got the rubber gloves on and you'll do fine.”

“Might want to tell Mr. Karnstein that,” said Gillian, pointing as Rafael started drying dishes.

“Well, in his case, he’s already dead, so not much risk,” supposed Laf, “besides he can dry three dishes at once so he’s probably the only person here who can keep up with her.”

There was a howl from outside as the collection of wolves and cats gathered on the lawn. Following the signal, they quickly loped across the yard and into the trees, disappearing from view.

Sky watched wistfully until the pack fully faded into the trees before wandering back to the living room, snagging a cookie for dessert. “Well they’ll probably be a while, anyone up for more mariokart?” said Sky.

“No, I’m bored of that game,” said Elsie, lounging on one of the couches.

“You’re just saying that cause Mom and I whupped ya,” teased Sky.

“You did not whup me! I went easy on you.”

“Mom?” called Sky

“Whupped!” came Perry’s voice from the kitchen.

Elsie just crossed her arms and started scowling at Sky.

“Okay, I’ve graduated, she’s no longer my principal,” said Sky looking around at everyone else, “why do I still find that terrifying?”

“That’s just Elsie,” said Hunter, “just try not to move much, her vision is based on movement.”

“Hey!” she protested, swatting her husband.

“Now watch as I remain perfectly still,” he continued, “she’ll lose me in seconds.”

“I think you’ve got your info wrong,” said Elsie, gathering herself, “allow me to demonstrate.” With that she pounced, bowling him over as she began to tickle him mercilessly.

Desperately, he tried to squirm away as he laughed uncontrollably. However, she had him pinned and knew precisely where to tickle him for the best results.

“Uncle!” he gasped, “I give! I give!”

Satisfied she’d made her point, she got off of him and returned to her seat with a smile.

“Clever girl,” he remarked, readjusting his clothes.

Charlie, who’d wandered off a few minutes before, returned to the room from downstairs a red box in her hands. “Mariokart is fun, but there’s not enough controllers for everyone, anyone up for Apples to Apples?”

x-x-x

“How on earth is dandruff ‘delicate’?” asked Aaron.

“It’s made of light, delicate flakes,” said Laf, putting a hand to their head, “allow me to demonstrate.”

“Uh, no. No. Thanks,” said Aaron, edging away, “ew.”

“Ha! Dandruff was mine!” exclaimed Hazel, “gimme that greenie! I’m up to seven.”

The doorwall to the deck opened as Drix let the pack members into the house. The rest of thr pack was still all in wolf form as they slowly padded into the living room, flopping onto the floor amongst the couches.

“Hey guys, how was the run?,” asked Charlie, “you guys were out there for a while.”

“Great,” answered Drix, taking a seat beside Aaron “but I think we pushed it a little too far. Everyone’s a wee bit tuckered out.”

“I can see that,” remarked Charlie as Xavier laid down at her feet, warming her toes with his fur.

“Why don’t we move the couches, so everyone can stretch out, and put on a movie?” suggested Sky as she absently scratched Mercy’s ears, “I think something low energy sounds like a good end to the evening.”

Quickly cleaning up the game, everyone worked together to push the furniture to the room’s edges as Sky threw a movie in the player.

“Brave? Good choice,” said Perry, “I’ve always liked Merida for some reason.”

Sky chuckled. “It’s familiar, good for relaxing. Now if you’ll excuse me, my girlfriend needs scritches,” she said, going to sit against Mercy where she could reach her ears with her hands and properly snuggle in as everyone got themselves similarly situated amongst their loved ones.

x-x-x

“That place was amazing,” said Laura as they walked into the house from the garage, “the music was the perfect mix of old and new.”

“The place was good,” agreed Carmilla, “though I could have done with fewer drooling lackwits. I was hoping the older music would have kept the idiot count down.”

“Nah, guys like that exist in every venue, I think they come pre-installed actually,” said Danny, “at least they were smart enough to keep a respectful distance this time. I didn’t really want to end another evening getting thrown out for mangling somebody.”

“I swear, that guy’s nose was already broken that one time,” protested Laura, “he was just being a big baby. Limbs bend way further backwards than that while doing yoga.”

“Anyways, I’m glad that things didn’t end like that this time,” said Danny.

“I’m not, I like it when Laura goes all Krav Maga on someone,” said Carmilla, “really gets me—”

“Shhh…” interrupted Danny, holding a finger to her lips, softly walking through the kitchen to the living room. She looked back to her wives, waving them forward with one hand while the other was on her mouth covering a mirthful smile.

Quietly, the two moved forward to see what Danny had. There, bathed in the light of the tv screen, was a pile of wolves and people, snuggled close and fast asleep.

Danny leaned close to Laura and Carmilla. “Anyone else get the feeling we missed something?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was sitting on this one, half-done, for months. Just couldn't find my groove with it for some reason and then *boop* found my way over the speedbump and here we are.
> 
> -Juniper


	32. Eye of the Beholder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most people would love to show off if they'd knocked twenty years of their looks, but what about someone who'd rather not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a follow-up to the multi-chapter arc from You Do for Family: Laura's Article. 
> 
> Quick summary for those not familiar: Laura writes article on local gang, gang shoots Laura, Laura gets immortality serum, Laura's age regresses to her mid-twenties. The age old story.
> 
> I think that catches us up, so if there are no further questions, let's proceed!

“I really think you should stay home today.”

Laura shot an irritated glance at Carmilla as she tugged on her favourite blazer, smoothing it down as she checked herself in the mirror.

“I've already called in sick to work for the past four days,” said Laura, “I need to get back.”

“Laura, you didn't have a some bug that you had to sleep off, you got shot,” protested Danny, “if it wasn't for Laf, you'd be calling in dead. You can afford to take a week or two to recover.”

“Financially, sure, but I really want to get this article out. After all the trouble we went through for it, I'll be damned if I don't make sure this thing gets to press personally,” declared Laura, “and besides, as you so kindly mentioned, Laf's serum healed me completely. I'm still not entirely happy that the immortality choice was taken out of my hands, but I can't argue with the results. I don't just feel back to normal, I feel like a million bucks.”

“Yeah, about that,” said Carmilla, snaking her arms around her wife as she met her eyes in the mirror, “how do you plan to explain returning to work all ‘Doctors hate her: look twenty years younger in just three days’?”

“Simple,” Laura replied, “I won’t.”

“Excuse me,” Danny balked, “you plan to simply walk into your building, go to your office, sit down at your desk and just go on with your day like nothing happened?”

“Yep, that’s the gist of it,” said Laura, casually putting on an earring.

Carmilla gave Laura a complete deadpan look before shrugging and walking back to sit on the bed, where she turned to Danny with a smirk. “Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m convinced.”

“Laura, this is serious,” Danny implored, “people are going to notice, they’re going to ask questions.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve got it covered. I’ve contacted an old friend to help with that.”

x-x-x

Laura strode confidently into the newspaper, swiping her badge and giving a friendly wave to the security officer at the front desk. She started towards the elevators before opting to take the stairs up to the third floor where her office was.

“Hey Kevin!” Laura greeted the receptionist as she stepped into the lobby, “any messages while I was off?”

“Nothing written,” he said, not looking up from his typing, “a handful of voicemails from a few local businesses. One from Town Hall, I think. Oh, and glad you’re feeling better.”

“Thanks Kev,” she said, walking past reception and towards the offices on the back wall. It was still fairly early, so most of the desks on the floor were still empty. She’d been careful to arrive early enough to avoid the majority of the staff, but not so early as to draw undue attention. Of the few people who’d beaten her in, most were immersed in their own work as they raced their deadlines. 

This was exactly as Laura had planned. Despite her bravado, she knew she wouldn’t stand up to immediate scrutiny. Kevin was a very lucky piece of the puzzle, he could always be counted on to be immersed in some report or booking arrangement and wouldn’t give her a first glance, to say nothing of a second. The rest of her strategy involved not dealing with too many people at once and hoping her change of appearance would simply go unnoticed or dismissed, so long as she didn’t draw any attention to it. 

Laura’s breath caught in her throat momentarily when one of her colleagues looked up and made eye contact with her across the room. She smiled and waved at him, hoping he wouldn’t look too closely. Luckily, he didn’t seem to notice the difference in her appearance as he returned both the smile and wave before returning to his work. With a sigh of relief, she made it to her office door, quickly slipping inside and closing the door behind her.

She hung up her jacket and slumped back into her chair, realizing with delight that no longer needing a cushy padding to support achy joints made said padding no less comfy to sit in. Feeling optimistic about the day, she started her computer booting up and dialed her voicemail to get a start on her morning.

x-x-x

It was a little before lunch before someone finally knocked on her door. Laura cursed internally but knew that this was an inevitable challenge she would have had to rise to meet some point before the day ended.

“Come in,” she called, focussing on her computer and trying to act as nonchalant as possible.

“Hey Laura,” said Jeana, as she opened the door, “thought I’d come see how you’re doing. You’ve been cooped up in here all morning.”

Apparently the universe had decided the challenge difficulty would be set to ‘extreme’ from the get go. Laura smiled pleasantly at the self-proclaimed ‘master of office gossip’, silently hoping she had some sort of latent force powers that would suddenly manifest to make her leave. 

_ This isn’t the reporter you’re looking for. _

“What are you waving at?” Jeana asked.

Laura looked down at her hand, with which she’d been mimicking the jedi motion unconsciously. She fought down a blush of embarrassment. “Uh, just a hand cramp. Been typing all morning to try and catch up. So, how can I help you, Jeana?”

“Well, I just finished tomorrow’s advertising layouts and submitted it to Mr. Grimsdottir. I thought I’d go out for lunch, would you like to join me?

“Oh, no thanks,” Laura said quickly, “I’m giving my article on the gang one last look over. If I submit it to Frank soon, I can get it in tomorrow’s edition.”

“I’ll never get how you got on a first name basis with Grimsdottir, no one else seems to…” she trailed off, studying Laura.

“What?” asked Laura.

“There’s something different about you, have you changed something? Your hair?”

“Well, I’m wearing it loose today,” said Laura, not mentioning that she’d done so to deliberately hide more of herself, “I usually pull it back.”

Jeana eyed Laura suspiciously before speaking, “yes, that must be it. Well… you’ll have to excuse me… I need to… lunch… eat… bye.”

Jeana quickly left the office as Laura groaned.That could have gone worse, but it could also have gone so much better. She didn’t have much time to bemoan her situation though. Evasive as it was, she wasn’t lying about needing to finish her edit. Theoretically, It could wait another day for more polish, but the weekend edition was going to be the best place for this article to get attention and it was only a matter of hours before it went to press.

Within half an hour, she’d finished her final edit and shot it off to her editor. Laura smiled to herself at having gotten it done. Now she could only hope that the effects would make the stress of the past few weeks worth it.

Feeling a bit run down, Laura decided to risk a run to the break room for some hot chocolate. Quickly glancing out her door to see if the coast was clear. There weren’t many people away from their desks, so Laura decided it was a good time to chance it. On the way, she passed Jeana’s desk, the woman not having gone for lunch after all. She glanced at Laura, who gave her a nervous smile as passed. On her screen was what appeared to be an archival photo of Laura from the past few years, looking just as young as she did at the moment. The woman still looked quite suspicious, but there was a hint of frustration behind her eyes as well.

Laura quickly moved onto the break room, where she quickly set about boiling a kettle and digging out her private hot chocolate mix from a niche she’d found in the lower cupboards. After a few minutes, she was sipping a fresh mug of cocoa and debating weathering another pass by Jeana’s desk to reach her office. She was startled out of her thoughts, however, by her cell phone buzzing in her pocket. Grabbing it, she could see it was her editor.

“Hey Frank, what’s up?”

_ “Hey Laura, could you come by my office? I need to talk with you.” _

Laura’s stomach dropped into her feet, “uh, yeah, sure. I’ll be right there.”

She hung up and frowned as she left the break room, cutting across the floor to Frank’s office. She tried to keep her focus on her destination, but she couldn’t help but hear Jeana as she talked with someone.

“She looks younger, I swear she does.”

“She just looks good for her age. Have you seen her wives? It’s probably just a really good skin regimen, or plastic surgeon.”

“This is different, this is—”

The rest of the conversation was lost to Laura as she reached the office and stepped inside. “Hey chief, what’s up?”

“Laura, it’s about your article,” Frank said.

“What?” Laura started panicking., “Is there something wrong with it? Does it need a rewrite? What if I—”

“Whoa, Laura, Laura. Calm down, the article is fantastic. This is going to be huge. I’m glad you got it to me on time, cause I’d have to stop the presses, which is damn expensive, let me tell you.”

“So what did you need to talk to me about?”

“Laura, are you and your family alright?” There was a clear look of concern in his eyes. “I’ve been in this business a long time, I know a first-hand account when I see it. They came after you didn’t they. That’s what you called in sick for.”

Laura winced at how close he’d gotten to the mark. “Yes, you’re right, but we’re fine. They tried to intimidate us, but we managed to get rid of them.”

“And lose about twenty years in the process,” he remarked dryly, smirking lightly as she started stammering out a denial, “don’t worry, you don’t have to say anything about it, I certainly won’t. The Lawrences are a very old and loved family in this community. Ignoring the… nuances… that surround them is practically a tradition around here. And those who aren’t very traditional”—he glanced knowingly out the window towards the advertising department—”won’t find much traction otherwise.”

Laura visibly relaxed, “thanks Frank. I appreciate that.”

“Appreciate what?” he said with a knowing smile, “we’re just discussing your article. Now, I’d like you to head downstairs to press and give them some input on the front page placement.”

“Will do!” she said, practically scampering out of his office. She felt much lighter as she called the elevator. Unfortunately, she didn’t notice who was walking into the elevator with her until it was too late.

“Laura,” said Jeana as the doors slid closed, she was furiously swiping at something on her phone.

“Hey Jeana,” Laura said nervously.

“I know something is different about you, and I’m fairly certain I’m about to find proof.”

Laura looked over Jeana’s shoulder, trying not to be too obvious. She was scrolling through the pictures she’d taken at last year’s christmas party until she settled on a moment Laura remembered very well. She was perched on Danny’s shoulders, engaged in a wrestling match with Carmilla who was sitting happily on Frank’s shoulders while the rest of the office cheered them on. Jeana pinched the screen, zooming in on Laura’s face. Unfortunately for her, the same youthful face as the woman beside her filled the screen.

“Sorry Jeana, just me,” said Laura, starting to feel a bit bad about the charade.

Jeana looked at her phone then back to Laura, before smiling knowingly, “well played Hollis.”

Laura nodded slightly, matching Jeana’s smile as the doors opened and she stepped out. 

Jeana remained as the door closed once more and Laura once again breathed a sigh of relief as she walked down the hallway to a door marked ‘Press’.

Walking in, she quickly made her way over to a woman at a large computer screen, sliding articles around each other.

“Hey Christen, Frank sent me down. Let’s see if we can make this pop.”

x-x-x

Laura returned to her office and locked the door behind her. The day was nearly done and despite some hiccups, she’d managed to make it through. There was just one thing left to take care of. Moving to her desk, she opened up her video conference program and entered a long string of numbers.

“IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again?”

“I swear. I’m am going to pants Laf for introducing you to that show.”

“Oh, I am terribly sorry Miss Hollis!” said the distinctly british voice, “I was trying to make a joke but it appears I did not have the delivery correct. I will refrain from humourous outbursts in future.”

“JP, it’s ok. I was joking. Your delivery was perfect, it’s just a bit groan worthy. That’s all.”

“Oh good, that is a relief. Now, if you don’t mind me asking, did everything go alright?”

“Yes Jeep, things were a little touch and go for a while, but I managed to keep it under wraps. You did a fantastic job of finding the pictures of me. You’re very good at photo manipulation.”

“Thank you Miss Hollis,” said JP, “the process is really quite simple. I could show you if you like.”

“Thanks JP, but maybe another time. I’m just about to head home. I just wanted to thank you for all your hard work before I headed out. Are you sure there’s nothing I can give you in exchange?”

“While I appreciate the thought Miss Hollis, even if I did want something, it would be rather hard to collect it given my non-corporeal state.”

“Fair enough. You should come by more at least. Consider this my invitation to the next barbeque, we can talk to Laf about maybe rigging something up so you can socialize.”

“Thank you very much, I would greatly appreciate it, though I fear my attendance will be seldom. My research in the Library of Congress is rather time consuming.”

“Well, it’s an open invitation. Just come on by… once we figure out a way for you to just come on by.”

“Of course Miss Hollis. Now, if you will excuse me, there is a rather interesting article on the habits of woodlice I was about to read.”

Laura laughed, “alright, have fun Jeep”

“And you as well Miss Hollis, take care.”

The connection closed and Laura shut down the computer with a smile. She gathered her things, excited at the prospect of what the article would bring in the morning. As she walked for the elevators, she passed the reception desk where Kevin was pulling on his own jacket.

“Night Kevin.”

“Good night, Laur— whoa!”

Laura winced, bracing herself to explain away the age difference again.

“I’d always pictured you as a brunette,” he said.

Laura laughed, “nope, though I’ve often thought it’d be a good look.”

“Nah,” he said, “drastic changes like that always stand out like a sore thumb.”

“Oh, you’d be surprised.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At long last, JP enters the Family U! Bringing him in wasn't my goal originally, I mostly wanted to address Laura's age regression with outsiders, but as I wrote it, this seemed like a natural place for him to appear. Not sure how much I'll use him, but I'm quite fond of him, so I'll probably find some ways to bring him out now that I've kicked him off.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed it and, as always, I'd love your feedback.
> 
> -Juniper


	33. Chasing Tales

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dealing with a pup who just wants to play can be trying at times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Stupid. 
> 
> This may be the stupidest thing I've written. I'm not apologizing for it, just fair warning. -Juniper

“Hey Mama? Did you see where I put down the homework I was doing last night? I could've sworn I left it on the counter here when I finished it.”

Carmilla looked over to where Charlie was leafing through the pile of household papers which had accumulated beside the fridge.

“Can't say that I have, what does it look like?”

“It's a lab report. Several pages of foolscap and graph paper stapled together.”

“Did you maybe put it in your backpack without thinking?”

“That's the first place I looked after I couldn't find it. My math homework is there, but my lab report wasn't.”

“Alright, go have a look through your room, I'll go have a look through the office in case one of your mothers picked it up by mistake.”

“Will do, thanks Mama.” Charlie headed upstairs while Carmilla went down the hall. Stepping over Drix, who was enjoying a lazy sunday nap on the hall carpet, she went into the office where Laura was busy typing something at her computer.

“Hey Cupcake?” asked Carmilla, starting to leaf through some papers on the corner of the desk, “Charlie can’t find her homework, did you bring any paperwork in here today?”

Laura paused in her typing, “I brought a few papers in here, but I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary. They’re just on top of the filing cabinet.” Laura gestured to the set of drawers beside the door.

Carmilla quickly found the pile and sorted through it, huffing when the missing lab report wasn’t in amongst the gathered pages.

“You could try calling Danny,” Laura suggested, “she went to campus to prep for some guest lecturer tomorrow and I know I saw her toss some papers into her backpack. Maybe Charlie’s homework got caught up in that.”

“Yeah, good thinking,” said Carmilla as she stepped out of the office, intent on retrieving her phone from the coffee table. She was just gingerly stepping back over her son when Charlie’s voice echoed through the house. 

“MERCY!” Charlie yelled, nearly making Carmilla topple twice over. Once out of surprise making her lose her balance and twice when the large panther, whom she’d still been in mid-step over, jumped to his feet, leaving her clumsily astride his back.

The two shared a look, but a clatter of footsteps and claw scratches from upstairs quickly took precedence and the two untangled themselves to go investigate the rigmarole. They entered in the kitchen to see Mercy, in her wolf form with a wad of paper in her jaws, paw open the door and bolt out into the yard.

Mercy ran out from the stairs and over to the open back door, yelling after her sister. “Mercy Hollis!” hollered Charlie after the twelve-year-old, “get your furry tail back here!“

“Whoa Charlie,” said Carmilla, stepping up behind her, “calm down. Why are you so angry at her?”

“Mama, she’s got my lab report!”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know, she just wandered into my room with it in her mouth. I think she’s trying to play, or maybe she just wants to bug me, I don’t know. I don’t care. She’s gonna ruin it!” cried Charlie as she walked into the backyard, intent on the small wolf who was poised playfully on the lawn, rump wiggling in the air as she watched Charlie. The moment her sister got close, Mercy leapt back and bolted into the trees, much to Charlie’s despair. “Argh! I’ll never catch her in there. If she shreds it, I’m toast. I can’t exactly tell the teacher ‘sorry, my sister ate my homework’.”

“Calm down Charlie-bear,” soothed Laura, joining them on the lawn, “your Mama and I will go get your sister. Why don’t you head into the house and rest. Drix, go with her, maybe get yourselves some ice cream. There should be a carton of rocky road down in the freezer.”

“Will do, thanks Mom,” said Drix as he walked back to the house with Charlie, doing his best to calm her, “hey, Aaron’s your lab partner, right? Worse comes to worse, we can call him and…”

They watched the two enter the house before turning towards the treeline and walking into the woods. 

“Did you wanna run ahead and catch up?” asked Laura.

“I was considering it,” said Carmilla, “but we need to make it crystal clear to Mercy that this is not playtime. Looking like I'm ready for a run is not going to help towards that end. Besides, she's just ahead. I can smell her.”

True to Carmilla's word, they came upon Mercy after less than a hundred yards, once again in the playful posture she’d had in the yard. Her eyes were bright, flicking back and forth to see if anyone else was going to join them. However, when no one else emerged from the underbrush, she seemed to wilt a little.

“Alright, Mercy,” said Carmilla, placing her hands on her hips in her best 'mom’ pose, “I know you want to play, but your sister's homework is not an appropriate toy.” 

“Not to mention,” added Laura, “you're just reinforcing a wolf stereotype. You’re setting wolves rights back decades.”

Both Carmilla and Mercy turned and stared at Laura incredulously.

“What?” asked Laura.

“No.... just, no,” said Carmilla, patting Laura on the shoulder.

Laura pouted at Carmilla before turning back to Mercy. “Now young lady, Charlie needs her lab report back. Why don’t you give me the report, we can go home and you can apologize to Charlie for taking her report and then we’d be happy to play with you. How does that sound?” she asked, reaching for the report.

Mercy barked cheekily around the report and danced out of Laura’s reach.

“Mercy!” snapped Laura, “get over here.”

Her answer was to just keep yelping and backing up.

“What is up with you today?” Laura said, her face scrunching in annoyance.

“Alright, I’m going for the direct approach,” said Carmilla, stepping forward.

“What’s the dir—”

Carmilla surged forward at high speed, rushing up and grabbing hold of the report with both hands before Mercy could even react. The wolf pup, however, still had a firm grip preventing Carmilla from yanking the report from her jaws.

“Mercy,” said Carmilla, holding tight, “drop the report.”

Frustratingly, her mouth remained firmly clamped down on the report as she began tugging against Carmilla hold, shaking her head and growling softly.

“Mercy, stop it,” she scolded, beginning to pull back more firmly.

“Uh… Carm?” said Laura, worry crossing her face.

“In a minute, Cupcake. Mercy, give... me... the... report.”

Mercy’s paws were well and truly dug in now, holding onto the papers for dear life.

Carmilla had also thrown caution to the wind and was now visibly pulling back against her daughter. Now she was committed to getting the wad of papers loose.

“Carmilla?”

The vampire only responded with a grunt as she strained. Mercy was also now growling almost constantly as she kept adjusting her paws, one by one, to keep from sliding forward.

“Carmilla,” cried Laura, “it’s gonna—”

A resounding ‘pop’ filled the air as the two flew apart, Mercy stumbling backwards and Carmilla falling back on her butt.

“...detach?”

Laura stared wide-eyed at the bundle of papers in Mercy’s mouth. Hanging from the side, still gripping the edge tightly, was Carmilla’s left arm. It ended perfectly smoothly, as if it’d popped off a fashion doll.

Carmilla stared down to where her shoulder had once been. “Ugh, not again.”

“Again?” exclaimed Laura, “this has happened before? how did it happen now?”

“Beats me,” said Carmilla, getting up and grabbing her arm off the lab report as Mercy watched her curiously, “werewolves are strong, but she shouldn’t be this strong. Last time was when I let Mattie try her chiropractic hobby on me. You, little lady,” she said, booping Mercy on the nose with her disembodied arm, “should not be able to pull the same feat.”

“It must be something she ate,” came an ominous voice. From behind a tree, that should have been too narrow to hide someone, stepped a figure adorned in a grey stove pipe hat and cape, twirling a long hooked moustache.

“Oh, hello Mother,” grumbled Carmilla, “I suppose you have something to do with this.”

“Indeed. Behold,” the Dean announced with a flourish of her cape, revealing a large bag.

“‘Bow-WOW!™’” recited Laura as she read the bag, “‘a nutritious blend of protein, nutrients and steroids so your pooch packs a punch’.” She stared deadpan at the Dean before looking at Mercy. How hadn’t she noticed the six-pack earlier?

“And now you won’t be able to interfere with my plans ever again,” the Dean proclaimed, “now that you’ve been… disarmed.”

“That pun was terrible,” groaned Carmilla.

“You’re terrible! And defeated!” squawked the Dean, “nothing can stop me now! Mwahahaha!”

With that, she threw down a smoke bomb and ran off.

“Should we tell her you’re supposed to vanish when you drop one of those?” Laura asked Carmilla as they watched the Dean stumble off through the trees.

“Nah, besides I need to call Zeke for this. Here, hold this.” Carmilla handed her arm to Mercy, who took it in her jaws happily, tail wagging.

Carmilla quickly grabbed her phone from her pocket and dialed with minimal difficulty. “Hey, Zeke?.. Pretty good, but I need another limb reattachment, can you squeeze me in?... No, not Mattie this time... You wanna try to tell her to stop, be my guest… uh-huh… yep… uh, sure. He wants to talk to you.” Carmilla held the phone towards Laura, who took it gingerly.”

“Uh, hello?”

“Laura? Wake up!”

x-x-x

Laura blearily opened her eyes to see Danny looking down at her.

“Ugh, Danny? What time is it?”

“A bit past seven. I just woke up,” she said, glancing at the clock, “I was about to go have a shower and I noticed you had the biggest scowl in your sleep. I figured you’d appreciate a wake-up call.”

“I do and I will forever sing your praises,” said Laura, before glancing over to where Carmilla was still dead to the world beside her, “hey, wait a minute.”

Laura lifted the covers enough to see Carmilla’s, very much still attached, left arm. Just to be certain, she tugged on it gently, rousing Carmilla.

“Cupcake, what?...” Carmilla drowsed.

“Nothing Carm,” said Laura with a kiss to her forehead, “go back to sleep.”

Carmilla made a contented noise of agreement before pulling the covers back up and drifting off again, drawing smiles from her wives.

“Well, since you’re up, care to join me?” asked Danny, offering her hand with a smirk.

Laura took the offered hand and allowed herself to be lifted from the bed. “That sounds like a lovely start to the day.”

“So, what was your dream about that had you so annoyed?”

“Ugh, I don’t wanna talk about it. Just the next time I want to power through a pack of oreos right before bed, please stop me.”

Danny chuckled as she led Laura through the bathroom door, “will do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, yes. I dream sequenced you guys again. This chapter was based on a joke between me and Jessi of Carmilla's arm popping off like a Barbie Doll, so the dream was kinda needed to pull it off.
> 
> I know this one gets dangerously close to crack fic territory, but don't worry, I'll be back to more normal fare next week (probably, we'll see what ideas I come up with)
> 
> Hope you guys liked it.
> 
> -Juniper


	34. Hedåyk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First you get the apartment, then you have to furnish it.

Perry and LaFontaine were enjoying a quiet night in. They’d settled themselves on the couch, snuggled together as they read in comfortable silence.

“Hey, Mom? Laf?” said Hazel as she came downstairs into the living room, getting her parents’ attention. She was rubbing her arm nervously as she sat down across from them, drawing concerned looks from the two, “I’m moving out.”

The silence in the room shifted from comfortable to strained as the two parents processed what their eldest daughter had just told them.

Lafontaine snapped out of their silence first, “well, that’s a relief.”

“What?” said Perry flatly, her own train of thought derailed.

“Oh! Oh no, not like that,” Laf backpedaled, realizing how what they’d said must’ve heard. They reached out, taking Hazel’s hand reassuringly, “I don’t  _ want _ you out. You just seemed distressed, so I was worried something was wrong.”

Hazel smiled at the reassurance, eyes shining.

“Are you and Charlie going to move in together, Sweetie?” asked Perry, her expression still neutral.

“Yeah, it seems overdue. I mean we’re engaged, but not living together. Not to mention, after so much time apart, I think we really need each other close. We decided it’s time when I was over there earlier,” said Hazel, smiling nervously as she tried to gauge her mother’s expression.

“Has Charlie told her parents yet?” asked Laf.

“Yeah, we actually ran it by them earlier this afternoon while I was over.”

“How did they take the news?”

“Laura was totally on board; Danny wasn’t thrilled at having a second child move out, but was supportive,” said Hazel, listing them off on her fingers, “Carmilla grumbled a bit as you’d expect, but then surprisingly, she already had a bunch of listings for apartments favourited and ready to go.”

“Let me guess,” said Laf with a chuckle, “all of them within five minutes drive.”

“Exactly right,” replied Hazel, sharing in the laugh, “though honestly, she made some good finds. There’s a cheap one-bedroom near the hospital that looks about perfect. We’re going to go look at it tomorrow.”

“Awesome. Sounds like you’ve got this in hand.”

Laf sat back again with a smile. Perry, on the other hand, was still sitting up rather rigidly. Her eyes were unfocused, looking down at a spot on the coffee table and there was a pensive expression on her face.

“Mom?” said Hazel, dipping her head into Perry’s field of view, “you’ve been really quiet. Are you okay with this?”

Perry blinked, pulled out of her reverie. Meeting Hazel’s gaze, she smiled warmly. “Of course I’m okay with it.” She laughed lightly. “I can’t claim to be overjoyed; my baby is leaving the nest; but this is the right step and you’ll always have our support.

“Oh good, does that mean you’ll help us with apartment vetting?”

Perry paused, her mouth left hanging open with her next thought derailed. Pursing her lips for a moment, she smiled with good natured resignation. “Yes, yes we will.”

x-x-x

Moving day came very quickly after that. Within weeks, with a lease signed and a truck rented, the pack showed up in force to usher the young women into their new home: the comfortable apartment near the hospital. With the pack came not only helping hands, but housewares and furnishings as the contents of basements, attics and storage lockers were offered up to the couple to get them started. By day’s end, what had started as an empty apartment was well on it’s way to looking like a livable space. 

“So, what are we missing?” said Charlie, thinking out loud.

“Well, for starters, a bed,” said Hazel, “this hide-a-bed Zach gave us will do for a night or two, but we’ll need to upgrade pretty darn quick.”

“Agreed, though I don’t get why we couldn’t bring one of our beds from home… I mean our parents’ houses… I mean…”

“It’s alright, Babe,” said Hazel, wrapping her arms around Charlie, “those houses will always be ‘home’ for us. This apartment will get there, but it’s still a new place for us right now.”

“Home,” Charlie repeated, looking around the apartment, “I can’t help but love the idea of coming ‘home’ to you.”

“Me too,” said Hazel, as she started kissing her way down Charlie’s neck, her fiancée tilting head to allow her better access.

Hazel stepped even closer, eliminating any distance between the two of them, and began to snake her hands up under Charlie’s shirt and across her stomach.

“A-hem!”

The two of them jumped apart like they’d been shocked, both turning to where Mercy and Aaron were standing by the front door, moving boxes in hand. Their expressions could only be described as a combination of amusement and irritation.

“Look,” said Mercy, “I know you two are excited about your new place and want to… christen it properly, but you should probably wait until everything moved is in and we all go home.”

“Or not,” teased Aaron, “just don’t expect us to stick around.”

Charlie feigned mulling it over for a few seconds. “Mmm, nah. Besides, you two went and ruined the mood.”

“Oh, my sincerest apologies.” Aaron grinned.

“Truly,” echoed Mercy, “now where do you want these? This crap is heavy!”

“Mercy, that box can stay out here and Aaron, that one can go into the bedroom,” directed Hazel.

Charlie’s face lit up. “Speaking of the bedroom—”

Mercy groaned.

“Not that you brat,” scolded Charlie, before turning back to Hazel, “what were you saying before we got distracted?”

“Oh yeah, we didn’t bring our beds because A: we still want places to sleep when we crash at parents’ houses,” explained Hazel, “and B: both our old beds are doubles. Fine for sleepovers, but we’d start feeling really cramped with that little space on a regular basis.” 

Charlie frowned. “But I like cuddling.”

“So do I,” reassured Hazel, pulling Charlie back into a hug, “but come the first heatwave, we are gonna be thankful that we can put a little space between us without one of us retreating to the couch.” She moved her lips close to Charlie’s ear before whispering, “not to mention, it gives us more room to play.”

“Hmm…” mused Charlie, “you make a good point. Alright, I’m sold. Now, what else do we need?”

“Some shelves, a coffee table, some night stands, maybe someplace we can set up a TV and stereo,” said Hazel, considering the space, “between what we brought and what the pack contributed, we’re pretty well set up.”

“I’m still not convinced we need the walnut kitchen table,” said Charlie, “feels too fancy.”

“Hey, we are nothing but class,” argued Hazel, prompting a snicker from Mercy. Hazel ignored her and continued on, “anyways, Grandpa Gus said it was just taking up space in his basement, might as well give it a home. As for the rest, I think tomorrow, we head to Ikea.”

“Good idea,” said Aaron, “you start packing survival supplies, I’ll get the compass and GPS. With luck, we can make it out with only two, three casualties tops.”

“Aaron,” said Hazel, “you do know that trips through Ikea go a bit smoother when you’re not trying to wrangle a small herd of siblings through that maze, right? I think we’ll be fine.”

“Your funeral,” joked Aaron, “when you don’t come back, can we have the table?”

Hazel laughed. “Sure.”

x-x-x

“Okay,” said Charlie, going over the list on her phone, “I think we’ve got the most of the item codes we’re after. We’ll grab them from the warehouse on the way out, and then the mattress will get delivered tomorrow. The only thing we’re missing is a cabinet for the office.”

“Wrong, we seem to also be missing our significant others,” Drix pointed out.

“What? Again? Did they make another wrong turn?”

“I don’t think so, they were with us past the last shortcut, so there’s no place they could’ve made a wrong turn.” 

“Maybe they went ahead?”

“I suppose, but there’s nothing ahead but the marketplace and— oh no.”

“What ‘oh no’?”

“Well, knowing Aaron, he—”

Drix’s phone buzzed. He took it out and immediately put his hand to his face upon looking at the screen. Craning her neck to see what had irked him, she saw a growing list of texts from Aaron on the screen.

> _ [OMG, you need to catch up!] _
> 
> _ [There’s so much good stuff here] _
> 
> _ [These mixing bowls are so cheap!] _
> 
> _ [AAAAA! cutting boards!!!] _

“I think we’ve found out why Elsie always kept Aaron distracted with the sibs whenever they came here,” joked Charlie, holding in laughter.

“You do realize that all of that is going into  _ your _ cart, right?” Drix said.

Charlie’s eyes widened. “Uh, we better catch up… like, now.”

Fortunately, thanks to Aaron’s distraction, he and Hazel weren’t that far ahead.

“There you two are. Don’t worry, I’ve managed to keep him from buying out the section,” said Hazel, pointing to Aaron who was flitting about like a child in a world of pure imagination, “I’ve let him pick a few things to fill in the gaps of what we got from the family”—she pointed at a yellow bag in his hand—”but I’ve managed to talk him down from the full set of induction cookware et al.”

“Nicely done, how’d you manage that?” asked Drix, watching his boyfriend with a soft smile.

“Simple,” said Hazel with a smirk, “I simply pointed out to him that he had a lovely kitchen of his own to fill with these lovely knick-knacks at a later date.”

Hendrix stared at Hazel deadpan for several second before turning to Charlie. “Bad news, Sis. I’m afraid I have to disown your fiancée.”

She just shoved him good-naturedly. “Oh come off it, she just saved you a mint and you know it. Next time he wants to go to Sur la Table, you can just bring him here where there aren't any four hundred dollar frying pans.”

“Ok fine, but if our cupboards collapse, I’m blaming you.”

“Fair enough.”

“Hey Aaron,” Drix called, getting the man’s attention, “we need to get moving. Lots of stuff to buy and build.”

Aaron looked like a kicked puppy, but came back to the group nonetheless as they started making their way towards the end. About halfway through the marketplace, Hazel’s phone rang.

“Hello?”

_ “Hey Haze,” came Laf’s voice, “how goes the swedish expedition?” _

“Pretty well. We’re just on our way out.”

_ “Nice. Faster than I expected,” they said, “anything you’re missing? Your Mom and I are just at Target grabbing you some cleaning supplies and I noticed they have some furniture here pretty cheap.” _

“We couldn’t agree on an office cabinet,” she replied, sharing a rueful smile with Charlie, “any prospects?”

_ “A couple. One second.” _

A pair of images popped through of a couple respectable looking cabinets.

“Ooh, I like the second one,” said Charlie, “it has drawers like we wanted but the colour is so much better than the ones here.”

“You catch that, Laf?” asked Hazel.

_ “You bet, we’ll grab it and bring it by in a bit.” _

“Thanks. Well, we gotta go. Time to slip a few discs to load this stuff up.”

Lafontaine laughed.

_ “I’ll have the painkillers ready for you.” _

“Thanks! Love you!”

_ “Love you too.” _

Hazel ended the call as they wandered into the warehouse and grabbed a flat-deck cart. “Welp, let’s do this. No pain, no gain.”

“You’re gonna make me get everything down, aren’t you?” whined Drix.

“Well, of course. Why else would we bring you along?” teased Charlie, “none of us have super-strength.”

“Maybe you like my company,” said Drix.

“We like Aaron’s company, does that count?” asked Hazel.

“I hate you... so much right now.”

“Aw, c’mon babe,” cooed Aaron, draping an arm over his shoulders, “ignore them. Besides, you know how much I like it when you show off; how much I’ll…  _ appreciate  _ it later.”

“Well, what are we waiting for?” said Drix, perking up and increasing his pace, “we’ve got furniture to get!”

The rest of the group trailed after him, chuckling, Aaron and Hazel sharing a subtle low-five

x-x-x

Later that afternoon found Sky and Hazel in the middle of the living room floor, surrounded by pieces of entertainment centre.

“Thanks for coming over,” said Hazel, “I haven’t a clue where Aaron and Drix could have gotten off to.” She shared a knowing grin with Sky.

“Happy to help. There is honestly something soothing about building furniture.

“I know. I’ve never gotten where the stereotype of Ikea furniture being a nightmare to build came from.” Hazel picked up the instructions. “I mean, I suppose trying to convey some of these steps without using any languages can be a bit ambiguous, but the worst we’ve had to go back today was a couple steps on the bedframe cause we used the wrong bolt.”

“I think it’s cause that Ikea guy on the cover is creepy.” Sky pointed at the cover. “People see him and immediately throw the instructions out.”

Hazel laughed as she turned a locking bolt, bringing two pieces to a seam. “Makes sense”

“Is this the last one we’re working on?” asked Sky.

“The last Ikea one. Charlie and Mercy are assembling the cabinet in the office.”

“Still? They went to start that after they helped us with the bed frame. What could be taking so—”

“Fuck!” yelled Mercy from the office.

“—long?”

Sharing a look, Hazel and Sky got up and headed into the office where they found what looked like a scene out of a horror film, provided the victims were all pieces of furniture. Random panels and bits of hardware were strewn all over the floor, no rhyme or reason to their arrangement and in the middle of the apparent explosion, hunched Charlie and Mercy over a small cross section of shelves and a set of instructions of their own.

“The instructions clearly say that this bolt, F, is supposed to connect this piece, ‘14’, to this piece, ‘8’,” said Charlie, looking back and forth between the instructions and pieces 

“I can see that, but piece ‘8’ doesn’t have any place for a bolt to socket into,” replied Mercy.

“I think that’s piece ‘18’, the sticker is torn.” Charlie pointed at the board.

“What?” squawked Mercy, examining the sticker, “this looks just like the picture.”

“It’s a rectangular piece of wood, they all look like the picture.”

“Here,” said Sky, picking up another piece from behind Mercy marked with an ‘8’, “I think this is the one.”

“Thanks Babe, how are you guys doing?”

“We’re onto the last flatpack,” Hazel admitted with a chagrined smile.

“Ugh, seriously?” said Charlie, “I wish I’d agreed with you on that glass-front one we saw. We’d be done by now.”

“Is it really that bad?”

“See for yourself,” Charlie said, handing over the instructions.

In comparison to the large booklet that currently sat in the middle of the living room floor, the double-sided sheet Hazel now held was an incomprehensible mess. The drawings were small, blurred and crisscrossed with lines supposedly showing where bolts and screws were supposed to go, though the destination of said lines was anyone’s guess.

Hazel turned the sheet over in her hand. “Why don’t you two go pick up where we left off on the entertainment centre? Some forward progress should help with the frustration and we can try to puzzle out this one.”

“And if you can’t?”

“Then we call in the ‘rents. Between Mom’s meticulousness and Laf’s ingenuity, they’d likely bring it to heel.”

“And if they can’t?”

“Then we burn it in sacrifice to exorcise the demons from the apartment and never speak of it again.”

“Sounds like a plan. C’mon Merc, let’s go feel smart for a while.”

“Ooh, that’ll be a new experience,” joked Mercy.

“Hey, none of that,” said Sky, snaring her girlfriend in a hug and resting her forehead on Mercy’s temple, “you’re plenty smart. Don’t let some manufacturer printing instructions in the ancient language of ‘dongivadam’ make you think otherwise.”

Mercy turned her head and gave Sky a quick peck on the lips. “I was only joking, but thanks.”

The two sisters left the room leaving the other two sisters with the mess.

“Come on, maybe if we sort this out, we can make some head way,” suggested Hazel.

“You really think so?” asked Sky.

“Hell no, but that’s not gonna stop me from trying.”

x-x-x

“Alright, that’s one queen-size mattress and box spring,” said the delivery person, having just placed the new acquisitions into the bed frame they’d built yesterday, “if I could just get you to sign here.”

Hazel took the phone and quickly scrawled out a signature with her finger on the screen.

“Alright, you have a good day Miss La Fountain.”

“Uh…” started Hazel, but the guy was already out the door. She just shrugged and proceeded to the bedroom where Charlie was pulling the new linens onto the bed.

“Oh, I can’t wait to sleep in this thing,” said Charlie as she smoothed out the flat sheet, “that hide-a-bed is pretty good, but I keep waking up stiff. It’s literally a pain in the neck.”

“I didn’t find it so bad.”

“That’s because you’ve been using my boobs as your pillow. Of course you’ve been comfortable.”

“What can I say, it works.”

“Oh, you’re terrible.” Charlie reached out and poked Hazel in the side, who squeaked and retreated. Charlie got an evil grin on her face and Hazel’s face fell, knowing exactly what idea had just popped into her head.

“Charlie…” said Hazel, stepping around the bed to try and keep it between her and Charlie. Unfortunately, she quickly found herself cornered, “no, no, no… ack!” Hazel burst into peals of uncontrolled laughter as Charlie lunged and began tickling up her sides.

Very soon, the two had fallen onto the half-made bed, the room echoing with laughter as they each tried to gain the upper-hand. Eventually, Hazel managed to straddle her fiancée and pin her hands above her head, both of them flushed and breathing heavily from the contest.

“Well Ms. Hollis, what a compromising position you’ve ended up in,” husked Hazel, her face barely an inch above Charlie’s

“So it seems. Now what are you going to do about it.” Charlie glanced at Hazel’s lips, licking her own in anticipation.

Hazel started closing the remaining gap agonizingly slowly, “well, first I’m going to—”

“Finished!” rang Perry’s voice from the office.

Hazel let her forehead fall against Charlie’s. “—do absolutely nothing because I forgot my Mom was in the apartment and that’s really not something that I think anyone wants to explain away.”

Charlie tilted her chin up to quickly smooch her fiancée before she sighed in resignation. “C’mon, we might as well go take a look at this cabinet that’s been causing us so much consternation.”

“Fine” groused Hazel, rolling off and helping Charlie to her feet.

The two walked into the office where Laf was packing up the remnants of packaging while Perry seemed busy polishing what was actually quite a respectable looking cabinet.

“Well,” she asked, “what do you think?”

“It looks good. I guess it was worth the effort in the end,” said Charlie, notably impressed by the furniture.

“Barely,” commented Laf, “I cannot apologize enough for saddling you with this thing. I’ve seen debunked scientific journals that made more sense than this thing. If it wasn’t for Per here, we wouldn’t have had a hope.”

“Well I wouldn’t go that far,” said Perry.

“I would,” countered Hazel, “thanks Mom.” She stepped forward and pulled her Mom into a hug. After a moment, she tightened her grip as tears started to spring forth. “Thank you for everything,” she whispered as Perry held her just as tightly.

They held the hug for what seemed like forever before Perry stepped back, wiping away tears of her own. “Well, since we’ve finished up here, I’ve got some cookies on the coffee table. Why don’t we head in there and celebrate? You two have finally moved in.”

The two looked at each other, not realizing until now that Perry was right. They were done.

“That sounds great,” said Charlie as the group moved into the living room. “It feels weird,” she said as she and Hazel sat down, “it doesn’t feel real; like once we’re done I’ll just head back to Moms’.”

Perry took a seat while Laf disappeared into the kitchen. “That’s normal,” she said, “it takes time to settle in, especially when it’s the very first time. But…” she added, glancing toward the kitchen, “it helps when you make an event of it.”

Laf had reappeared carrying a bottle of champagne and four flutes. “What can I say? We wanted to mark the occasion,” they said, filling the four glasses. Once they were ready, Laf took one and held it up in a toast, the others mimicking their motion, “so, let me be the first one to properly say this. Welcome home.”

With that, the four raised their glasses to their lips and drank to the new chapter in their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Confession time. I pretty much just wrote this chapter to rail on non-ikea, flatpack furniture. I had to assemble a display model at work the same day I started this chapter and wow, what a pain in the ass. Missing pieces, badly machined parts and terrible instructions. Needless to say, inspiration was not in short supply. Also, second confession: Aaron is totally me in Ikea. I couldn't care less about the furniture (unless I actually need something), but put me in a room filled with cooking stuff and I started running around like a ferret on caffeine.
> 
> Hope you all liked this chapter, let me know what ya think
> 
> -Juniper


	35. Hide nor Hare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Learning to hunt takes time

Dusk was growing close when the rabbit stuck its nose out of the warren. The sun had disappeared behind the surrounding trees and the light was low.

The old buck remained still at the burrow entrance, paying attention to any sights, sounds or smells that could indicate a threat. The only movement he made was the twitch of his ears as he pivoted them back and forth, listening for signs of danger, but the only sound that could be heard was the faint rustle of a gentle breeze through the surrounding trees.

Cautiously at first, the rabbit hopped across the clearing, heading towards a choice patch of clover. There had been a rainfall during the night previous and it had left the clover a choice grazing opportunity. Joining a couple of younger does, the buck immediately set into the greenery with fervor.

A soft snap came from the direction of the trees and the rabbits froze in place, ears pivoting on high alert. They remained still for several seconds until the needs of their stomachs took precedence once again and they resumed their meal, albeit with a little more attention paid to their surroundings.

The old buck ate his full and set about chewing pellets when an out of place rustle from the nearby tall grasses made him rear up on his haunches in alarm. He focused on the direction the noise had come from, nose twitching nervously.

There was a definite movement to the grass that was alarming him; with every passing moment he grew more tense making ready to run. He kept his attention in that direction and noticed, in the grass, a bright pair of predatory eyes staring right back at him. In an instant, he stamped his feet and bolted for the safety of the burrow.

From the grass behind him came a loud, frustrated yowl and the sound of scrambling paws as the predator gave chase. Ahead, the rest of the warren had heeded his warning and was making good their escape underground. He flew across the clearing as fast as his hind legs could propel him until he reached the warren mouth and threw himself underground. Moments later, there was a loud thump and the sound of scratching as whatever had been behind him tried to unsuccessfully follow him into the burrow. The rabbits retreated deeper into the tunnels, hoping that whatever was out there would just give up and go away.

x-x-x

Carmilla walked out from the trees into the clearing, now completely devoid of rabbits. She chuckled to herself; it appeared that the day's activities were done whether she liked it or not. It wasn't a huge problem though, it was getting late and nearing time to get home anyways. However, before she could, there was still the small matter of retrieving her son.

She wandered over to the centre of the field where the largest entrance to the warren was. However, instead of simply a well dug hole in the ground, the burrow was currently augmented with the flailing hindquarters of a panther cub. His tail was swishing in frustration as his hind legs scratched against the ground, trying to push him further into the tunnel system. Carmilla slapped a hand tightly over her mouth as she struggled not to burst out laughing. She quickly took the opportunity to snap a picture of the youngster with her phone before squatting down beside him and patting his back to get his attention.

“Hey little guy, I don’t think you’re gonna fit,” she said, “you might not be fully grown, but a weasel you’re not.”

A muffled meow came from under the soil.

“I know it sucks, but sometimes they just get away. Now c’mon, it’s almost dark, we should go home.”

Drix meowed again in agreement and immediately began to backpedal. Unfortunately for the cub, he made no more progress backward than he had forward, his paws slipping in the loose earth. After a few seconds, he dropped his butt to the ground and yowled.

“You’re stuck, aren’t you?” asked Carmilla.

He squeaked reluctantly.

She pinched the bridge of her nose with a smile on her face, shaking her head as she struggled not to laugh. “Alright m’boy, let’s get you out of there.”

Stepping behind him, she got a hold of him around his middle and gently pulled. He made a small murr of protest as his fur rubbed uncomfortably on the sides of the burrow, but before long, a very dusty Drix was extricated from the confines of the burrow. He shook himself in a token effort to get clean.

Carmilla chuckled.“A for effort, but it’s gonna take more than that to get you clean, I think” she said, Drix folding his ears back at the implication, ”for now it’s probably best if you don’t—”

Drix shifted, leaving a pouting eight-year-old with dusty clothes where the cub once stood.

“—shift.” Carmilla deflated slightly as she watched the boy try to wipe the dirt off his face, succeeding at only smearing it around. “Nice try, but you’re still getting a bath.”

Drix pouted. “Mama, I don’t wanna. I hate baths.”

“I know you do, Bud,” said Carmilla, taking his hand and leading him towards home, “but you’ll start to feel really icky if we don’t get that dirt off of you. Come on, you can quickly take a bath and then we’ll watch a movie with popcorn before bedtime, does that sound good?”

“Mmmm…” Drix hesitated, “can I have some blood hot chocolate?”

“Sure,” she said with a smile, “you did a great job today, I’d say you earned it.”

“But Mama?” asked Drix, “I didn’t get the rabbit. It got away.”

“You’re right it did, but you prowled up very well; you stayed low and stayed patient, the rest is just luck and practice,” explained Carmilla.

“It was really fast,” he mused.

“That’s why we have to stalk them,” said Carmilla, “they don’t look it, but that’s what rabbits do. They’re built to do two things to survive, out-run predators and out-breed predators.”

“What’s out-breed mean?” he asked, looking up at her.

Carmilla smiled back at him. “It means they have a lot of sex to make a lot of bunnies so there are too many to eat.”

“Oh, ok,” said Drix, getting lost in thought for a moment, “it’s like the circle of life, right? Rabbits get to live, predators get to eat.”

Carmilla laughed. “Yes, exactly.”

“Mama, can we watch Lion King tonight?”

“We’ll have to ask your sisters if they want to watch it too, but I think they’ll be happy with that.”

They got back to the yard just as night was settling in, a warm glow from the house welcoming them home.

“Alright, let’s get you clean. The sooner we finish, the sooner we can have chocolate.”

Needing no more encouragement, Drix ran into the house and upstairs.

Danny watched in amusement as the boy scampered past. “Good hunt?”

“Rabbit got away, but he did well, so I promised him a movie night.” Carmilla glanced upward at the sound of the tub being run. “Would you mind making some popcorn and hot chocolate? If I don’t get upstairs to help him, our bathroom floor will become an infinity pool.”

Danny laughed. “Go, go. Clean up the great hunter. I’ll get the stuff ready. What movie we watching?”

“Lion King, if the girls are up for it.”

“What? Not Alpha and Omega?” asked Danny with a grin.

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that,” said Carmilla as she headed up the stairs.

x-x-x

The family lounged comfortably around the room. Everyone had been quite happy with Drix’s selection and was now happily enjoying their treats.

“You know Drix,” said Charlie, “you could learn something from this movie.”

“What?

“Well, you let some slow, waddling rabbit get away from you today,” she teased, “maybe you could pick up some hunting tips from these lions. What do you think?”

Silence answered her.

“Drix?” she looked around the room. Her Mom’s were watching her with amused expressions and Mercy was on the other couch, attention fixed on the screen. Drix, on the other hand was nowhere to be seen. “Aw jeez, I was just teasing, I didn’t mean to be mean. You can come back Dr—”

From behind the arm of the couch, a panther cub leapt onto Charlie, making her yelp in surprise. With her pinned, he began to aggressively lick her head, doing his best to mess her hair up.

“Alright, alright!” she pleaded, “you win. You can pounce just fine!”

Satisfied, he leapt off of her and onto the other couch, beside Carmilla who rested a hand across his back.

“That’s my boy.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short one this week. While Lion King was definitely a part of my inspiration, I was mostly channelling Watership Down (The book, not the movie, I didn't want to give people nightmares)
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed!
> 
> -Juniper


	36. Stringing the Bow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valentine's day is a good day for surprises, some of which may work better than others

“Hey! Hey Danny! Wake up!”

Danny groaned as she drowsily dragged herself to wakefulness. Her efforts, however, were obviously not quick enough as she found a pile of clothes tossed into her face.

“Ugh… Elsie, what the hell?” asked Danny groggily, glaring at her fellow Summer as best she could, propping herself up on her elbow.

“You asked me to wake you up,” Elsie replied cheekily.

“A knock on the door would have sufficed.”

“Nowhere near as entertaining though,” said Elsie as she slipped back into the hall.

Danny flopped back to the bed with a huff before noticing that the wad of clothing Elsie had tossed at her contained one of Laura's shirts. She smiled and held the fabric up to her face, inhaling deeply. Danny jerked her face back and held the shirt up for a moment before her smile widened even further. The shirt was definitely Laura’s, but the scent was almost entirely Carmilla’s.

She couldn’t help but wonder, if the vampire had worn Laura’s shirt over here, what was she wearing when she left. Danny brought the shirt back to her nose, letting herself indulge in fantasies of Carmilla wearing one of her shirts. She would be swimming in them, but Danny didn’t care, the image excited her anyways.

Danny’s reverie was interrupted by another clothing missile smacking her in the face. 

“Y’know, if you want to stay in bed that’s fine,” teased Elsie, “just gives me more excuses to fling stuff at you from the doorway. I think I might have a few water balloons left over from when we pranked the Zetas last November.”

“Alright, alright,” said Danny, levering herself out of bed, “I’m up. Call off your dogs.”

“Hey, I had no intention of calling up any dogs on this,” said Elsie, “I wasn’t about to share my fun with the pack.”

Danny playfully shoved Elsie as the two walked into the hallway, “don’t let the rest of the pack hear you calling them dogs or  _ you _ might be the one dodging water balloons.”

“Oh, they all know I love them. Besides, it’s not like any of them heard me.”

“Woof!” someone yelled from downstairs as Elsie’s eyes went wide.

“You forgot how well we could hear, didn’t you?” asked Danny.

“Little bit,” said Elsie, pressing her lips together in thought, “I wonder if Mel would like some company on her run this morning.”

Danny snickered. “Between Mel in workout mode and the annoyed pack, I’d go with the pack if I were you.”

“Hey, some of us actually get along with her, thank you very much.”

“And maybe hoping to get along a little better?” Danny playfully nudged Elsie with her shoulder.

“Well, if things happen to go down that road, I certainly wouldn’t be opposed. It’s the right day for it.”

Danny laughed. “Careful with that, it wouldn’t surprise me if that actually works against you. Mel’s never struck me as someone who really bought into the whole Valentine’s thing.”

Elsie glowered at Danny. “Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

“Oh yeah!” said Danny, perking up, “I’ve got things to get ready.” She strode forward into the bathroom, turning to face Elsie before closing the door. “I think I heard Mel warming up out front, you should probably go change and get out there if you want to catch her before she heads out. I’d wear tights, it’s supposed to be nippy out there,” Danny added, gesturing to Elsie’s shorts and t-shirt before closing the door and starting the shower.

Elsie huffed at the somewhat unnecessary remark before hurrying off.

x-x-x

“Hey Danny, how’s the day going?”

Danny jumped as Laf came up behind her as she stood outside their dorm building.

“Oh, hey Laf, you startled me.”

“Yeah, I noticed. What’s up? Usually the high-strung and twitchy part of your act belongs to Frosh.”

Danny frowned at the assessment, but really couldn’t disagree with it.

“Well, I want to go leave a note for them,” she said, nodding up towards her girlfriends’ window, “you know, do the whole ‘cute and mysterious’ thing for v-day?”

“Isn’t that Carmilla’s schtick?”

“She doesn’t have a monopoly on it.”

“So, what are you waiting for?”

“I’m trying to determine if Laura is there or not. She should be in class right now and therefore Carm will be fast asleep, so leaving the note will be easy. If Laura took the day off, however, they could both be up and Carm will hear me for sure.”

“You guys make all your squishy feelings just way too complicated. Look, I just got Perr a dozen roses from the Alchemy Club’s fundraiser by the cafeteria,” they said, holding up the bouquet, “and then we’re gonna spend the evening cuddling and watching a movie.”

“Well that sounds— did that bouquet just growl?”

“A little, I’m sure it’s fine.”

“...right. Well, that sounds great, but I just wanted to try and be a little fancier this year… and get flowers that don’t nibble on my clothing…”

Laf tugged the blooms off the hem of their coat. “Well, I won’t fault you that, but isn’t it a ways to the nearest actual florist?”

“About forty-five minutes each way, which is why I need to hurry up and figure out if it’s safe to drop my note. I’m supposed to meet them back here at five”

“Tell you what, give me the note and I’ll slip it under the door. Even if Carmilla hears me, you still get to be somewhat mysterious by sending it through a confidant.”

“Seriously? You’d do that? That’s really cool of you Laf, thanks.”

“Not a problem, it’s room 507, right?”

“Laf…”

“Kidding, kidding.”

x-x-x

Leaving the note in Laf's charge, Danny ran back to the lodge to grab her truck and begin gathering what she needed to set the stage tonight.

For the most part, her day went smoothly. The flowers had been easy enough to acquire, despite the long drive and crowded shop. Luckily, she’d had the foresight to order the flowers ahead of time, so her time maneuvering around the panicking women and men cramming the shop was minimal and she managed to escape the shop without having to cripple anyone too badly.

The next item, a pack of premium cookies for Laura from the bakery across town had taken a little more effort. The main street of town from one end to the other was taken up by a huge Valentine's fair. After thirty fruitless minutes of trying to find a road crossing, she gave up and ran to the bakery on foot. The bakery was blessedly quiet and the cookies were added to her bag of loot in short order. However, what should have been the easiest part of the day cost her an hour she didn't have and she still had to pick up the gift for Carmilla that she'd spent the longest time planning for.

Danny had gotten the idea for blood-filled chocolates months ago, but had had no idea how to go about it. Her own experiments in making them always seemed to result in burnt chocolate and coagulated blood. Asking Perry had, predictably, resulted in her fellow redhead freaking out, though Danny had to admit, her lodge room had never been so clean, so she figured that it wasn’t a complete loss.

It wasn’t until she’d noticed that the cafeteria staff had a proclivity for creating delicious, if mildly suspect, desserts that she figured she may have a solution. It took a bit of persistence, not to mention dodging a couple of hexes from annoyed cooks, but she eventually found one that was not only willing to help, but apparently already had a recipe that had been a ‘favourite of Governor Belmonde’. While it meant that Danny wasn’t a fan of the source, Carmilla would probably like them so she commissioned a couple dozen, for a rate that was not only reasonable, but in actual currency, much to Danny's surprise. She'd been expecting to have to hike for some obscure reagent which only grew on one of Styria's myriad cursed mountain peaks in exchange for the candy. The cook had laughed at the idea; apparently online shopping was a much better source for such things these days.

They'd arranged for Danny to pick them up the afternoon of the fourteenth, to ensure they were at their freshest. Unfortunately, she had been later than she'd hoped picking them up as she swung back in from town and had to evade a couple more curses for interrupting dinner prep. However, soon enough she had the chocolates in hand and tore her way back to the lodge to get ready. Opting for a simple shirt, vest and slacks, she gathered up her payload and launched herself out the front door with only minutes to spare.

At mere seconds before five, Danny arrived outside door 307, breathing heavily after her full bore sprint from the lodge. She was trying to take a minute to catch her breath when the door opened.

“Y'know, it kinda spoils your entrance when I can hear you panting the other side of the door.”

Danny didn't respond immediately as she was busy taking in the sight her girlfriend. “You're wearing my shirt,” Danny purred.

Carmilla looked down at herself and then back to Danny. “I squeeze myself into leather pants and it’s the baggy  _ shirt _ you notice.”

“The pants look good”—Danny took a moment to trace her gaze over the curve of Carmilla’s hip—”very good, in fact. But I’ve been imagining what you’d look like in this all day, and I can say I’m not disappointed.”

Danny stepped closer to Carmilla, licking her lips as she leaned in until she found herself obstructed by her cargo. Both she and Carmilla looked down at the plastic wrapped bouquets crinkling between them. Carmilla smirked at the gifts.

“Well, I can’t say I’d dislike pressed flowers, but it might be healthier for them to put those in some water.” Carmilla stood up on her tip-toes to quickly peck Danny over the flowers before spinning on her toe and gliding back into the dorm.

Danny rolled her eyes and followed after the vampire. “Here, these are for you,” said Danny, holding out a bouquet of violets and irises.

“What? Not roses?” joked Carmilla as she accepted the bouquet.

“Sure, then we’ll go to dinner at Applebees,” said Danny, meeting Carmilla’s grin.

“Please tell me you’re joking,” said Laura, coming out of the bathroom in a smart pair of slacks and navy blazer.

“Of course I’m joking,” said Danny, walking over to Laura and handing her the other bouquet of red and orange tulips.

“We’re going to McDonald’s” jeered Carmilla.

The other two just stared at her with deadpan expressions.

“Ok fine, tough room.”

“Actually,” said Danny, “I’ve made us reservations at the faculty club for dinner.”

“Ooh, swanky!” exclaimed Laura.

Carmilla, on the other hand, looked like the wind had just dropped right out of her sails. “Oh, yeah. Yeah, that sounds great… I’ll just… uh… find a shirt…”

Carmilla got up and made to dig into the wardrobe, but before she could make it very far both of her girlfriends were at her sides.

“Ah ah ah, sit,” said Laura, putting an arm around Carmilla’s shoulders and bringing her back down to the bed, “we know you better than that.”

“Yeah, what’s wrong?” asked Danny, snuggling in from the other direction.

“It’s nothing, really,” said Carmilla, hunching further into herself, “dinner sounds great.”

“Carm,” said Laura, “c’mon.”

Carmilla wilted a little more. “Well, I just… I wanted…” She got up and wandered over to the kitchenette where she picked up a basket that had been hidden under a blanket. “I thought that maybe we could have a picnic under the stars.”

Laura found herself speechless, looking to Danny, who simply smiled at Carmilla.

“I think that sounds lovely. Let’s do that.”

“But you went to the trouble of making reservations.”

Danny chuckled. “I did a fair bit for today that could be described as ‘trouble’. Dinner reservations don’t fall under that umbrella.”

Carmilla frowned “But—”

Danny held up a finger, interrupting Carmilla’s protest as she pulled out her phone with the other hand, quickly dialing a number. “Hi there, I need to cancel my six-thirty reservation, something’s come up... yeah, under Lawrence… thanks so much… bye!” Danny ended the call and met Carmilla’s gaze. “Oops, it seems our reservation got cancelled, whatever shall we do for dinner now?” Danny intoned with a smile.

“Why it looks like Carmilla has a picnic basket, Danny,” Laura played along, “how very resourceful she is. Isn’t she just the best girlfriend ever?”

“Absolutely.”

“You two are dorks,” Carmilla said, laughing lightly as her eyes shone at them.

“Your dorks,” replied Laura.

x-x-x

Carmilla led them to the roof where she’d already set up what could only be described as a large nest of pillows and blankets. The three had snuggled together and in true Carmilla fashion, champagne and glasses were quickly produced to start off their meal. The evening was leisurely, the three revelling in each other’s presence and warmth as they nibbled at the simple fare of breads, meats and cheeses. Carmilla passed the time detailing the constellations in the night sky, telling the tales of the legendary figures. 

As the night air developed a harsher chill, the scent of snow on the breeze, the three came to a silent agreement to return to the warmth of the apartment. They gathered up the plates and basket and Carmilla saying she’d collect the blankets later. This suited the other two as none of them seemed to want to break contact long enough to pick them all up.

“Carm, that was a wonderful idea,” said Danny, softly placing a kiss on top of Carmilla’s head as they reentered the room, still holding each other close despite the night’s chill having been left behind.

“I’m glad you liked it, though I’m still sorry I stepped on your surprise earlier,” she said.

“You didn’t,” Danny assured, “dinner was just someplace to go. I’ve still got more up my sleeve.”

“Actually,” interjected Laura, “I’ve got something for you two as well. You guys make yourselves comfortable, I’m gonna go get it.” She quickly placed on kiss on each of their cheeks before scampering into the bathroom and shutting the door behind her.

“Huh, well I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that we all planned something,” mused Carmilla as they sat down on her bed.

“I suppose not,” agreed Danny, “though I think we should talk ahead of time next year. Y’know, avoid the potential sitcom ‘where are you?’, ‘where am I? where are you?!’ thing.”

“Yeah. That’d be bad,” Carmilla said as she leaned into her girlfriend, resting her head on Danny’s chest. 

The two cuddled for a few minutes as they waited for Laura to emerge when a large thump came from the bathroom, their heads snapping up at the sound.

“Cupcake? You okay in there?” asked Carmilla.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” called Laura through the door, her voice a bit overly chipper.

“Ok,” said Danny, skeptically, “let us know if you need a hand.”

“Will do!”

“We missed you today,” Carmilla said softly, after another few moments of comfortable silence.

“Did you not find my note?” 

“Oh we did. The mad scientist bonked their head sliding it under the door.”

Danny chuckled. “So much for mysterious.”

“Oh, is that what you were going for?” said Carmilla, looking up at Danny, “well, it was a lovely sentiment, but I rather would have had you here.”

Danny squeezed Carmilla tighter before perking up and going over to her bag. “Well, I did have a few errands to run and this seems to be an opportune moment to give you something else I picked up.” From her backpack, she pulled out a plain white box which she handed to Carmilla.

“Danny what—” was all that Carmilla said before she caught a whiff and her eyes went wide, “wait, you didn’t.” She opened a box to find the neatly arranged chocolates inside. Experimentally, she picked one up and bit into it, a trail of blood running down her chin. Her eyes rolled back for a moment in ecstasy at the treat. “I haven’t had these in years. Not since my last, uh… sabbatical, with Mattie. Thank you.” Carmilla put the candies aside and pulled Danny into an embrace.

Fortunately for Danny, the metallic tang on Carmilla’s lips was something she was not only used to, but now anticipated as an aspect of sharing a moment with her partner, so the lingering blood did little to deter her.

The moment was interrupted a moment later by a knock and Laura’s shaky voice coming through the door. “Alright, I’m coming out now. Hope you’re ready for your surprise!”

A moment later the door opened and out stepped Laura, fully decked out in what could only be described as classic, black lace lingerie, complete with garters, stockings and high heels. The pieces hugged Laura’s curves perfectly, accentuating every well-toned muscle. Danny and Carmilla would have been completely floored if it hadn’t been for one little detail. Despite her best attempt at a sexy pose in the doorway, Laura looked about as comfortable as if she was wearing barbed wire.

“Wow, Laura,” Danny hesitated, “you look… great.”

“I’m glad you think so,” said Laura. Her voice was husky, but there was a definite quaver to it as well. Gingerly, she stepped forward, moving towards the two of them in a slow strut, “you’ve both been amazing today and I think that you both deserve aaaaaa—”

Laura’s lost her balance as one of her heels went out from under her and she began to tumble. Before Danny could react, there was a blur of motion from beside her as Carmilla surged forward and caught Laura before she could fall.

“Easy there, Cupcake. Those stilts are harder to master than they look.”

“Thanks Carm,” said Laura as Carmilla set her on her bed, “so much for my sexy surprise.”

“Nothing wrong with your idea,” said Carmilla, playing with the bra strap, “but if you’re not into it, we’re not gonna be either. Simple as that.”

“I meant what I said,” added Danny, as she sat on Laura’s other side “you look… damn good, in that.” Danny looked Laura up and down with a lick of her lips, making Laura blush and smile. “We’ll just have to save it for an occasion when it feels a little more… in tone.”

Laura raised an eyebrow. “So you’re saying we should just get rid of it for now?”

“Oh yes,” agreed Carm, leaning forward and catching Laura in a kiss. She broke the kiss a moment later but still kept her face close to Laura’s, “we’ll just ditch it and resume our evening.”

“And how do you suggest that we go about that,” asked Laura, her voice pitching down in earnest.

“Well, first…” said Danny as she reached behind Laura and, with a flick of her wrist, undid the clasp.

x-x-x

It was late the next morning when Danny, absolutely beaming, strode through the front door of the Summer’s lodge.

“Well look what the cat dragged in,” snarked Mel as she walked towards the stairs, coffee in hand, “doing the walk of shame, Lawrence?”

“Doing a walk? Yup! Shame? Oh no,” said Danny, “A bit tired for lack of sleep though.” She waggled her eyebrows at the other girl.

“Gross, Lawrence. Thanks for sharing.”

“Aww, Mel. Are you jealous?” said Danny, feeling feisty as she trailed Mel up the stairs.

“Jealous? Hell no. You can can keep your little threesome with the bloodsucker and cub scout. I am doing just fine, thank you very much.”

“Just fine, eh?” teased Danny, “why Ms. Callis, did you manage to find a little companionship to make your valentine’s a little less lonely?”

Mel stopped outside her bedroom door and turned to face Danny. “No, I didn’t find ‘companionship’, Lawrence. Not that I need to, I am doing just—”

The door to Mel’s room opened and out stepped Elsie in Mel’s bathrobe. “Hey, I hope you don’t mind me borrowing your— oh hey Danny. How’d yesterday go?”

Danny stayed silent and just looked at Mel with a huge smirk, who turned beet red before retreating into her room and slamming the door.

“Yesterday went  _ very _ well,” said Danny, finally answering the question, “I guess yours turned out pretty good as well.”

Elsie returned the smirk. “You could say that.”

The two shared a high-five and headed off to start their days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I hadn't really planned ahead on doing a Valentine's chapter, but when I realized the day coincided with my update, it seemed mandatory.  
> I hope you all liked it and that you all had a Happy Valentine's Day, however you define that for yourself.  
> -Juniper


	37. Roll Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Staying the night in new place can be scary, but a bit of the family touch can make it a bit easier.

“Trudy! Trudy, come here girl!”

The clatter of dog claws echoed through the house as the basset hound heeded her master's call. LaFontaine couldn't help but smile at their dog as she lumbered around the corner and trotted up to them, tail wagging. They crouched down to meet her, affectionately rubbing and scratching the dog’s ears.

“You know it’s funny,” Laf said, “here she is, as happy as can be and her face still just looks so sad.” They took Trudy's face in their hands and frowned dramatically at her before resuming their ministrations, scratching under her ears.

“If you keep that up, she is gonna be even sadder that you’re leaving her with us for the weekend,” said Carmilla.

“Well, someone oughta be,” said Laf, keeping their attention on the dog, “the girls can’t wait for a weekend away from us. It’s enough to make a parent feel rejected.”

“Sweetie, they’re just being kids,” comforted Perry as she fussed with her carry-on bag on the kitchen table, “they like a change of pace.”

“I suppose,” groused Laf, “I just wish they weren’t so obvious about it.”

“Well tell ya what,” said Carmilla, “while you’re gone, we’ll just lock them in the basement and turn off the lights, then they’ll be overjoyed when you get back.”

Laf chuckled and opened their mouth to joke back at her when they caught the aghast look Perry was giving the vampire. Quickly, they killed their smile and screwed their face into a disapproving frown as best as they could. “That is not funny.”

The vampire smirked at the obvious about-face. “Fine, we’ll treat them like our own,” Carmilla said with an overly dramatic sigh, “I guess you’re just gonna have to live with them being excited at weekends with us. I think I’ll take them out for ice cream.”

“You’re an evil, evil woman,” said Laf.

Carmilla smirked at them. “And?”

Laf huffed and went back to heaping affection on their dog.

Carmilla chuckled before turning back to Perry. “So we’ve got the number for your hotel at Martha’s Vineyard. The girls will come home with our own brood after school this afternoon and we’ve got everything to take care of Trudy, save Trudy herself,” she said, nodding her dog, “can you think of anything else?”

Perry paused, looking up in thought. “...No… I keep thinking I need to give you school or doctor’s numbers, but it’s all the same as you. You’re even our emergency contact, so that’d be somewhat redundant.”

“Well, alright then,” said Carmilla, clapping her hands together before looking at her watch, “in that case, let’s get you two to the airport and then I’ll take this pooch home.”

Perry’s head snapped over to the clock on the wall. “Oh my goodness, I didn’t know it was so late. Lafontaine, hurry up and go grab your things from upstairs! Carmilla, I can’t thank you enough for offering us a ride.”

Carmilla shrugged. “Eh, seemed less stressful than waiting for a cab that may or may not show up on time. Although, watching you chew out a late cabbie probably would have been amusing, but not enough to deal with the freakout.” Carmilla winked at Perry’s unimpressed glare.

“Alright, let’s roll,” said Laf, coming down the stairs with a large duffel bag over their shoulder, “Vineyard, here we come!”

“I wouldn’t have thought you’d be all that excited about Martha’s Vineyard,” said Carmilla, “doesn’t seem quite your thing.”

“Hey, I like a change of pace just as much as the kids do, this’ll be relaxing,” they protested, “besides, we’re going on at least one winery tour while we’re there. I don’t get to use fermentation much in my work, so seeing it in action will be interesting.”

“There it is,” said Carmilla, laughing as they loaded up and pulled out of the driveway.

x-x-x

“Okay kids, time for bed.”

A collective moan went up from the around the room as Danny picked up the remote and ejected the DVD.

“Mom, c'mon” pleaded Drix, “it's not a school night and we're having a sleepover, can't we stay up a bit later?”

“Ok bud,” said Danny, smiling at the eight-year-old, “how does eleven o'clock sound?”

“Great!” he said, missing the snickers of Charlie and Hazel.

“Alright,” Danny said with a nod, “go to bed.”

“What?” cried Drix, “but you just sa—”

“Drix?” interrupted Charlie, pointing somewhere behind him.

Following her direction, he turned to see the clock on the wall. The time: five minutes past eleven. “Oh…” he said, pouting.

“Yeah, ‘oh’” repeated Danny, “c’mon, you guys need some sleep and then you still have the whole weekend ahead of you.”

Lethargically, everyone in the room got up and filed their way upstairs as Danny went about cleaning up.

“Are you sure you two are okay sharing with Charlie and Mercy?” Laura asked as Hazel and Sky were brushing their teeth, “we can put you in the guest rooms downstairs if you want some privacy.”

“Ngh, agh wn t’ stgh wt Ehphy,” mumbled Sky around her toothbrush.

“What?” asked Laura, suppressing a laugh.

Hazel spat her toothpaste into the sink. “She said she wants to stay with Mercy and same goes for me. Being alone in the basement is kinda scary.”

“Alright, just thought I’d check,” said Laura, “You two sleep well. Don’t hesitate to come talk to us if you need anything.

“Thanks Aunt Laura,” said Hazel.

“Thank you Auntie Laura!” chirruped Sky, “good night!”

“Good night you two,” said Laura as the two went to their respective friends’ rooms. Satisfied that they’d be able to get themselves to bed well enough, she went into her own room and began her own nightly rituals. She was pulling on her pyjamas when Carmilla walked in, Trudy following at her heel.

“The kids settled in?” asked Carmilla.

“Yeah, I think so. Danny said she’d do one last check when she came up.” Laura looked down at the hound. “She didn’t want to sleep in her bed?”

Carmilla knelt down and scratched Trudy behind the ears. “I don’t think she sleeps in her bed at night anyways. I think she usually sleeps on one of her family's beds.”

“Go figure,” said Laura, “well, we’ve got plenty of room. C’mon Trud. Up!” Laura beckoned the dog as she slipped under the covers. 

Trudy looked up at Carmilla for a moment before trundling across the room and, with a bit of struggle, hefted herself up onto the alaskan king bed and laid down near Laura’s feet.

It was a few minutes after both Laura and Carmilla had settled themselves in and were reading quietly that Danny came in. “Alright, the girls are all still up and chatting, but I think they’re flagging and will have themselves out before long,” Danny said as she started getting changed for the night. She was just lifting her shirt when she paused, looking at Trudy. “She’s spending the night with us?”

“Well, yeah,” said Laura, “she followed Carm to bed, so I figured she wanted to be in here with us.”

“So, what you’re saying,” said Danny, a grin slowly creeping onto her face, “is that there is already dog fur on the bed.”

Carmilla perked up, a matching smile on her face as she caught Danny’s meaning.

“I suppose she’s leaving some dog fur, but wh— oh…” said Laura, realization dawning on her face, “alright fine, just don’t get too snuggly. You two are like fur covered furnaces.”

Danny lit up and quickly changed into her PJs before shifting into her wolf and snuggling up, side to side with Carmilla, who’d shifted once she’d given Laura enough room. Trudy, noticing her new bedmates happily got up and flopped down on Carmilla’s other side. Laura smiled warmly at the three before returning to her reading.

A short while later, just as Laura was putting her book away, there was a knock from the door as it slowly opened, revealing Mercy.

“Moms?” she asked, a worried expression on her face, “Sky’s feeling homesick.” Behind her, as she walked into the room, the small redhead was sniffling and had tears running down her face.

“Oh sweetie,” said Laura, getting up and gathering the small girl into a hug.

“I-I-I’m sorry Auntie Laura,” cried Sky, clinging onto Laura.

“It’s alright, sweetie,” said Laura, “it always feels weird to spend the night in places that aren’t your own bed, no matter how familiar they are.” She took a moment to look back at her wives who, judging from their gazes, were already on the same page that she was. “Tell you what, why don’t you spend the night here with us? Trudy is here too, so it should feel a little more like home.”

“Really?” asked Sky, “thank you!”

“Umm…” said Mercy, “can I…?” She looked meaningfully at Danny.

Danny yipped and jerked her head in beckoning.

Mercy smiled and before long, the wolf pup was on the bed, nuzzled into her mother’s side. Laura let Sky slide in beside Trudy before settling back in. Laura turned out the light and snuggled under the covers

Laura couldn’t be certain how long she’d been asleep when she was awoken by Danny getting up and jumping out of the bed, shifting on the floor.

“Danny?,” Laura whispered.

“Can you turn on the light?” asked Danny, “I think we’re gonna have more company.” Danny headed out into the hallway and walked down to Charlie’s room. 

Walking in, Charlie was fast asleep on the air mattress on the floor. Hazel on the other hand, was curled up on the bed, crying quietly. Tiptoeing past her daughter, she knelt at the bedside and placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder, making her start.

“Shh, shh, it’s just me,” Danny whispered, “you have a bad dream?”

Hazel sniffled. “Uh-huh.”

“You want to come sleep with us?”

“...yeah”

“Alright,“ said Danny, taking the girl’s hand and helping her out of the bed. They were about to leave the room when a hand grabbed Danny’s ankle. Danny chuckled. “Yes, you can come too.”

“Thanks Mom,” said Charlie softly as she got up and followed them into the hall.

Coming back into the master bedroom, Danny made a quick assessment of the logistics. “Charlie, you can go lay down by your sister; Hazel, you can sleep beside Sky and Laura there.”

“Thanks Aunt Danny,” said Hazel as she climbed onto the bed, letting Laura help her under the covers.

Satisfied everyone was comfy, Danny shifted back and leapt back onto the bed, the frame creaking slightly under the added weight.

“I don’t think even our bed was intended to take quite  _ this _ much weight,” said Laura, looking over at Carmilla.

Carmilla just looked over at Laura and shrugged, murring dismissively.

Laura shook her head, but decided not to worry about it. She was about to turn the light back off when the room door opened, a panther cub nosing his way into the room, meeting Laura’s gaze questioningly. Laura rolled her eyes, but shuffled in from the edge of the bed as far as she could, trying to make room for Drix to jump up. Drix, instead, simply jumped onto the empty space beyond her feet and lay down.

The bed groaned again under the load, but otherwise seemed to remain stable.

“Alright,” said Laura, looking around at the very full bed, “I think that’s everyone… what’s the weight limit on the frame?”

Both Danny and Carmilla looked at her and shrugged.

“You’re both so helpful. Well, if it breaks, it breaks. I’m too tired to worry about it otherwise. A new frame might be a nice change of pace, Night all.” And with that, Laura rolled over and turned out the light.

x-x-x

“Hello!” called Perry as she walked into the kitchen where Laura and Carmilla were just finishing dinner.

“Wow, that was fast. Didn’t Danny just leave to go get you?” said Laura, checking the clock.

“We got lucky,” said Laf, “our luggage came out first so we were able to leave almost as soon as Danny got there. So how were our girls?”

“They were like little angels,” said Carmilla, before breaking down laughing, “okay, maybe that’s a little far, but they were good.”

“First night was a bit rough,” said Laura, “homesickness and nightmares.”

“Oh, poor dears,” said Perry, “I hope they didn’t keep you awake.”

“No, not that we would have minded. They’re as good as our kids,” said Carmilla, “we’d do anything for them. We just let them sleep in our bed along with Trudy.”

“Trudy too?” asked Laf, impressed, “didn’t your rascals feel left out?”

“Of course not,” said Danny as she came in the room, “in other news, our bed can support over a thousand pounds… apparently.”

Lafontaine laughed at that. “Well, at least you know you bought quality.”

“I should hope so for what I paid for that thing,” replied Carmilla.

“Well, I suppose we should get the girls and get them out of your hair,” said Perry.

“Out of our hair?” asked Laura, “Perry, we love having them here. Besides, the kids are having fun playing in the yard right now, dinner is just about ready and we made enough for everyone. You guys just got off a plane, just relax for a bit.”

“Dudes, you’re awesome. Thanks,” said Laf.

“Yes, thank you very much,” said Perry, sitting at the table happily, “we’ll try not to stay too late.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. We loving having you two just as much as them,” said Danny.

“And besides, even if you were to end up staying the night,” added Laura, “we’ve got room for everyone.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cherry picked this from a prompt that Jessi got for her soccer stuff (letting the dog sleep in the bed). It's kinda neat that ended up in a different direction with the same idea. We'll have to try that out more.
> 
> As always, let me know what you think!
> 
> -Juniper


	38. Better Late Than Wetter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like a water fight on a hot summer's day.

“Hey Mercy! Heads up!”

“Wha—”

Something soft impacted on the top of Mercy’s head and she was immediately covered from head to toe in water.

“Charlie!!” yelled Mercy, “what the hell!”

“It’s a hot day,” wheedled Charlie, “you oughta be grateful.”

“I oughta tell Moms you’re up on the roof throwing water bal—”

Another balloon exploded in her face, 

“Sorry sweetie, I missed that. What did you need to tell me?” called Danny from behind Charlie.

“Mom!” squawked Mercy, sputtering indignantly before stomping inside.

“What's she angry about? It's a hot day,” Danny said, giving Charlie a high-five

x-x-x

Laura watched from her perch at the kitchen island as Mercy stomped through the room towards the stairs, trailing water behind her.

“Got you too, huh?”

Mercy looked towards her mother, who pointed to her own damp hair

“You couldn't have called to warn me?”

“I suppose I could've,” mused Laura, “but then again, if I had, you'd have probably gone to Sky’s and then who'd help me get back at them.”

Mercy glared at her mother in silence before huffing in annoyance. “Alright fine, but you get to clean up my water trail while I change into a bathing suit.”

“Deal, but we can't head out just yet,” said Laura, turning a page of her book, “we're still waiting on reinforcements.”

“Oh, did you call—”

“Mom!” came Drix’s yell from outside.

“Nope,” said Laura, turning another page.

Mercy just shook her head and headed upstairs.

x-x-x

“Alright!” cheered Charlie as she climbed through the window into her bedroom, “three for three! It's too bad Mama won't be home til tonight, we got plenty of water balloons left.”

“We went through less of them than I was expecting,” said Danny, passing the mostly-full bucket of balloons through the window to her daughter, “I think our aim must be improving.”

“Must've been all those snowball fights last winter,” mused Charlie, “takes practice to hit a leaping panther, y'know.”

Danny chuckled, “that it does.”

Charlie paused at the door to her room. “So, you think they're waiting to get us back?”

“Oh probably,” replied Danny, “I'd be disappointed if they weren't, but I doubt they're waiting in the hallway. Waterfights in the house tend to be unpleasant to clean up, so they probably won't try to get us in here.”

“Do you honestly believe that?” asked Charlie, “or are you just trying to get me to go first as bait?”

“Charlie Hollis!” exclaimed Danny, “I'm surprised at you. To think that my own daughter would think so little of me. I am shocked… shocked and appalled… shocked, appalled and horrified… that you figured it out.”

“Thought so,” said Charlie, deadpan as she opened the door, “age before beauty.” Charlie swept her hand towards the open door, receiving a glare from her mother.

“You are such a brat,” Danny complained, “I don't know where you get it from sometimes.”

“I learned from the best, of course.”

“Of course.”

Cautiously entering the hallway, Danny strained her senses, trying to detect anything suspicious. She could hear the shower running, but there was no other sign of movement upstairs. Turning back to Charlie, she nodded and led the way forward.

Carefully, the two made their way down into the kitchen, where they found a cranky looking Laura, hair still damp and scraggly, reading at the island. She glanced at them as they entered the room before taking a sip from a glass of ice water before pointedly returning to her reading

“What’s wrong? No grand declaration of revenge?” asked Danny.

Laura looked up from her book. “That was the plan, but my erstwhile allies were cheesed off that I didn't warn them about you two, so they each went to dry off in their own way.” Laura used her glass to gesture upstairs and then out the windows towards the back lawn.

Out in the middle of the grass, Drix was stretched out in his panther form, warming himself in the summer sun, with his t-shirt laid out, drying on the grass beside him. He had himself twisted around, kneading the air with his front paws as he dozed.

“To abandon you in your time of need,” said Charlie, hefting the bucket of balloons, “such dereliction of childly duties cannot be ignored.” She pushed her way out the doorwall and onto the deck, grabbing a balloon before heading down the stairs.

“I'm so proud to have such a loyal, caring daughter,” said Laura, wiping away a tear that wasn't there.”

“That we do,” agreed Danny, wrapping an arm around her wife, “we should probably teach her to not be so trusting of sob stories though.”

“Oh definitely.”

Outside, Mercy came out of her hiding place behind the barbeque and snuck up behind Charlie, bucket in both hands. Before Charlie was even aware of her presence, Mercy upended the bucket over Charlie's head, soaking her from head to toe. Charlie went rigid at the shock, dropping both the bucket and balloon, the latter bursting harmlessly on the grass. Slowly, Charlie turned her head to glare at Mercy.

“What?” asked Mercy innocently, “it's a hot day. You should be grateful.”

“Oh, I'll show you grateful,” said Charlie, a devious smile crossing her face. In a blur of motion, she jammed a hand into the bucket and flung a balloon as soon as it was clear. Her throw went wide, but it was enough to make Mercy scamper away with a shriek of laughter.

“Oh Charlie,” called Drix in a sing-song voice.

She turned back to him to find him staring her down with a big watergun in hand. Keeping eye contact, she fished another balloon from her bucket, cocking her arm in a stand off.

“So, who do you think is gonna flinch first?” Danny asked Laura as they watched the stand-off.

“Oh that's easy,” said Laura, “you will.”

“What do you— ack!” Danny flinched backwards as Laura reached up and slipped an ice cube into Danny's collar, from where it fell down into Danny's bikini top.

Giggling maniacally, Laura bolted out the back door as Danny tore her shirt off to get at the offending cold intruder.

“Well, if I can expect that sort of welcome, I should come home early more often.”

Danny whipped around to see Carmilla standing in the door to the mud room, eyeing her hungrily. Realizing she still had her hand in her top, Danny quickly fished out the ice cube and tossed it in the sink.

“Is it really  _ that _ hot out?” purred Carmilla, raising an eyebrow at Danny before glancing outside, “cause of the two approaches, I really think the kids have the right idea.”

Outside, Drix and Charlie had somehow switched weapons and were chasing each other around the yard while Laura and Mercy were at the hose, refilling balloons and buckets.

“Ha ha,” deadpanned Danny, “care to join us? Charlie and I are outnumbered three to two. We could use a hand.”

“Hmm, let me think,” said Carmilla, putting a finger to her jaw as she made a show of thinking it over, “keep poring over the dry paperwork that drove me home in the first place, or play with my family in the summer sunshine. How ever will I choose?”

“Well, I understand if you’re too busy to spend time with us,” said Danny, slowly walking towards to door, pouting sadly.

“Oh come off it, Xena,” said Carmilla, jumping up on Danny’s back, taking the opportunity to kiss her wife on the cheek, “gimme two minutes to change into something more water friendly and I’ll be right out.” Carmilla gave Danny one more kiss before jumping down and running up the stairs. 

Danny watched Carmilla run up the stairs before turning to go back outside. Before she went, she decided, she needed one last thing. Walking over to the fridge, she opened the freezer drawer and pulled out the bucket from the ice maker. Cargo in hand, she strode back to the door and out onto the deck.

“Alright everybody,” she called out, dumping the ice into the nearest bucket, “I think it’s time we chill out a little.” Danny then picked up the bucket and waded into the maelstrom.

x-x-x

“I think we drowned the lawn,” said Drix, taking a sip of lemonade.

“If it can handle the entire pack stomping all over it, it can handle a little over-watering,” said Carmilla.

“The flower boxes, on the other hand, I think are toast,” Laura said, pointing to the collapsed marigolds along the deck's edge.

“Eh, it’s not like we grew them from seed and sprout,” said Danny, “I’ll pick up some more from the nursery next week… once the boxes have dried out a bit so they’re more ‘garden’ and less ‘bog’. What someone needs to do, however, is get out there with a rake to clean-up all the water balloon bits.”

“Probably the person who had the brilliant idea of throwing water balloons in the first place,” suggested Mercy, looking between Charlie and Danny.

Danny’s mouth snapped closed as she and Charlie looked at each other.

“Well, we have two rakes,” said Charlie, pushing back her chair.

“Fair enough,” said Danny as she got up.

“Sit down you two,” said Carmilla, “you can do that later. This is family time.”

“I think we’ve been causing a state-wide water crisis with all the family time we've been having today,” noted Mercy.

“So what,” Carmilla retorted, “who knows how many more years we have before you kids start moving out and this”—she gestured around the table—”is no longer a regular thing. At the very least, let's get to the bottom of this pitcher of lemonade before we let reality intrude again.”

“Alright, sounds good,” said Laura, “but once we're done, I need to start dinner. We're expecting Laf, Perry and the girls over and I've lost track of time, so I'm not quite certain when—”

A high-pitched, curly haired yelp came from the back door of the house.

“—they're going to show up. Hi guys,” Laura greeted cautiously, concerned at the horrified look Perry was giving the yard, “is it five-thirty already?”

“Nah, only four-thirty,” said Laf, “we were coming over early to help with dinner, but looks like we missed the fun anyways.”

“A bit,” admitted Danny, “but come pull up a chair.”

“What on earth happened to your yard?” exclaimed Perry, surveying the carnage.

“What can we say?” said Carmilla with a smirk, “it's a hot day.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been thinking warm thoughts to get through this annoyingly stubborn winter. Hope you all enjoyed this little slice of summer!  
> -Juniper


	39. Playing the Course

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit of childish fun between sisters

Hazel knocked on the door lightly as she entered Sky and Mercy’s apartment. “Hello? Anyone home?”

There was no one in the living room to greet her, but the apartment was far from silent. From behind the closed door to Mercy’s office the repetitive beat of a drum track could be heard accompanied by the occasional riff of an electric guitar.

Hazel chuckled and checked her watch. It was late in the afternoon so Mercy probably would call it a day before long, though Hazel secretly kind of hoped she would try and keep going; the entire family had personal permission from her and Sky to get… creative, whenever she started overworking and Hazel still needed to one-up Charlie’s “slick-string guitar”

For the time being, however, Hazel was willing to wait, so she headed into the kitchen to scout out something to drink while she waited. She was in the process of trying to reach past some purple stuff to grab a bottle when she heard someone enter the kitchen.

“Well, sounds like someone is home early. Hey there, sexy-pa— you’re not Sky,” Mercy finished dejectedly.

“Nope, close though,” said Hazel, standing up with a colourful bottle in hand, “also, is this Kool-aid? Are you guys twelve?” Hazel had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing at Mercy’s frustrated expression.

“We happen to  _ like _ kool-aid, thank you very much,” said Mercy, snatching the bottle from Hazel’s hand and flinging it back into the fridge. Slamming the door shut, she flopped backwards against the fridge before taking a deep breath and looking up at Hazel, who was still struggling not to laugh. “So what brings you by? If you’re looking for Sky, she’s gonna be another hour or so.”

“Actually, she isn’t,” said Hazel, hopping up onto the counter, “Mom’s going to surprise her and take her to dinner after she’s done rehearsal. Get in a little one-on-one time.”

“Oh that sounds fun, you know where Aunt Perr is taking her?”

“That new Japanese place near the theatre, I think.”

“Ooh yummy,” said Mercy, “well, thanks for coming by to let me know. I guess I’ll grab a bite and get back to work.” She turned around and began perusing the fridge.

Hazel just stared deadpan at her sister-in-law. “Please tell me you’re not serious or are you really that much of a dork?”

Mercy looked back over her shoulder. “Well, I don’t know. How dorky is having bottles of kool-aid in one’s fridge?”

Hazel stood in stock silence before stepping towards her sister-in-law. “Alright, let’s go.” In one smooth motion, Hazel picked Mercy up and threw her over her shoulder, kicking the fridge closed behind them.

“Ack, no! What are you doing?!”

“Kidnapping you,” Hazel said as she calmly walked out of the apartment and locked the door, despite Mercy’s flailing. “Evening Mrs. O’Reilly.” Hazel smiled at Mercy’s neighbour as she stepped out of the elevator.

“Good evening girls.” The old woman beamed at the pair. “Going out for a night on the town?”

“Heather, help! She’s kidnapping me!” begged Mercy as they passed her.

“That sounds like fun dear, reminds me of the good ol’ days. Have a good night!”

Hazel stepped onto the elevator, not bothering to conceal her laughter. “We will!” she called back as the doors closed.

“So as much fun as it is talking to your butt, could you please put me down?” asked Mercy.

“Hmmm… no.”

“Ugh, you’re so annoying. Where are we going anyway? We meeting up with Charlie?”

“Yes, I am; not telling, it’s a surprise; and no, actually. Tonight’s the night she’s staying late on campus to see that anthropology talk, so it’s just you and me.”

Mercy continued to struggle futilely against Hazel’s grip as they left the elevator and walked through the lobby to the parking lot. “How are you so strong? You’re a friggin’ chemist, you should have noodle arms, dammit!”

Hazel only laughed at the comment as she opened her passenger door and unceremoniously dumped Mercy into the front seat.

“I could make a run for it now if I really wanted to,” said Mercy as Hazel for in the other side.

“You could,” responded Hazel, fastening her seatbelt, “but you won't.” She fixed Mercy with a smug grin and started the car.

Mercy glowered back at her, reluctantly reaching for her own seatbelt. “We better not be headed anywhere too nice. You didn't give me a chance to change.” Mercy gestured to the plain tank and comfy jeans she'd been working in.

“Nah, not fancy at all,” said Hazel, “flip-flops are fine for the opera, right?”

“Hazel…” growled Mercy softly.

“I'm kidding. Yeesh kid, you need to learn how to take a joke,” said Hazel, ribbing Mercy a little.

Mercy rolled her eyes, but smiled. “When one grows up with your wife as a sister, you kinda get in the habit of staying on guard.”

Hazel thought on that for a moment. “Alright, fair point. Actually, write down that opera thing. We really should have something ready next time she and Aaron get uppity.”

Mercy whipped her phone out and quickly typed something out. “Done and…”—the telltale chime of an incoming message sounded from Hazel’s front pocket—”done.”

The two women shared a conspiratorial grin before bursting into laughter.

“Alright,” said Mercy, “where  _ are _ we going?”

“I told you, it’s a surprise. We’re not far, you’ll just have to wait it out.”

“But I don’t wanna wait,” whined Mercy, pitching her voice as nasally as she could, “I wanna know nowwww.”

“No!” exclaimed Hazel, “God, you’re annoying. Is this why we haven’t spent time together in months? Have I blocked out the memory? How does Sky put up with you?”

Mercy grinned smugly. “I find she tends to really like when I get loud and high-pitched.”

“Oh come on, Mercy,” said an exasperated Hazel, “I really don’t need to be picturing by baby sister doing that.”

“What?” asked Mercy innocently, “I sing for her. You really have a dirty mind, don’t you?”

“I swear, I will turn this car around…”

Mercy laughed. “Alright, alright. I’ll let up. But I still want to know where we’re heading.”

“Well, have a look then,” said Hazel as she turned the car into a parking lot, “cause we’re here.”

Mercy looked out at the colourful fenced grounds and vaguely cartoonish logo of the entrance as they parked the car. “A fun centre? Really? Which one of us was it that was supposedly twelve again?” Mercy teased as she got out.

“Your insult would have more bite to it if you weren’t so obviously excited with the prospect of being here.”

Mercy attempted to school her expression to something a little more sober, but the corners of her mouth remained stubbornly turned skywards as she pressed her lips together.

“Okay, stop that. We're here to play mini-golf, not plot world domination.”

“Can't we do both?”

“Without the map?”

“I keep telling you, my moms’ old copy of Risk isn’t an accurate representation of the world or our forces therein.”

“You mean, I’m not undisputed despot of Kamchatka?” Hazel asked with a sad pout.

Mercy patted her softly on the head, “sorry, maybe next year.”

The two made their way into the front entrance and quickly headed for the ticket counter.

Hazel looked up at the price board. “I figure we can start with mini-golf and then we can decide what we want to do from there.”

“How about whoever wins picks next activity?”

Hazel nodded. “Sounds good. What if we tie?”

“Pistols at ten paces,” Mercy said firmly, “as is tradition.”

“As is tradition.”

Before long, with balls and clubs in hand, the two were out on the course, enjoying the summer afternoon sunshine. 

“Alright, so let’s see,” said Hazel, pulling out the scorecard after the eighth, “I got a three on that one and you got… four?”

“Five,” grumbled Mercy, “I hate bouncy holes. I always hit it the wrong way and my ball bounces off into a corner.”

“Hey, look at it this way. They let me catch up. I’m no good at the holes that require finesse. You’re great at those ones where they raise the hole up so your ball rolls away if you miss.”

“Well, I suppose that’s true,” said Mercy as they approached the next hole on the course, “and then there are the holes that just hate everyone.”

In front of them stood a house with a narrow ramp up into the front door, beneath which lay a wide trench. Through the door lay a hole in one. The trench? A journey into no-man’s land and a long shot to the pin.

“Well, you won the last one, so you get first shot,” said Mercy.

“Alright, no sweat. Just need enough pepper on the ball to get into the house.” She placed her ball on the rubber mat and, after a quick practice swing, lined up her shot and struck. Her ball whizzed forward, glancing off the ramp and into the protective mesh, obviously placed for just such an occasion, before dropping into the trench, popping out onto the far end of the green below. “Damn… too much pepper.”

“True, but you’re not being all that salty, so I think it’s okay.”

Hazel laughed as Mercy went to take her shot. After Hazel’s shot, she hit the ball with a greater degree of caution. Unfortunately, she ended up being  _ too _ timid as the ball rolled back down the ramp and into the face of her club on the tee. Mercy and Hazel looked at the ball speechlessly before looking back to each other with smirks on their faces.

“Well, that’s one,” said Mercy before tapping the ball a little harder than last time. This time she was rewarded by a satisfying clunk of the ball making it through the door into the tube system inside. Gleefully, she stepped over to the green, waiting for her ball to appear. Moments later, it popped out of the near-side exit and rolled across the turf towards the hole… before missing it by a fraction of an inch. “What?! No! I was robbed!”

“No kidding,” agreed Hazel, “go ahead and clear and then I’ll start my long journey towards home.

In the end, Hazel ended up maxing out her score at seven before sinking her ball, giving Mercy a slight lead. 

As they progressed through the course, they found themselves catching up to a young family with a couple of really little kids happily meandering their way through each hole. At the fourteenth, Mercy and Hazel took a seat at the tee to wait for the group to advance. Mercy couldn’t help but enjoy the innocent enthusiasm the small boy and girl gave to the game. Practically hugging their putters, they clumsily whacked the colourful balls down the green as their parents helpfully used hands and feet to keep the balls roughly on track. There was no sense of competition or conflict, just the freedom of the game. When the little girl sank her red ball and was swept up, giggling, by her father, she couldn’t help but find the child’s laugh infectious, and began laughing along as well.

It was then she looked over at Hazel, to see what she thought of the little ones’ antics, and saw the dreamy yearning she’d seen painted so many times on her own sister’s face over the years.

“Have you talked to Charlie about it?”

“Huh?” said Hazel, startled out of her trance, “talked about what?”

Mercy smiled softly and inclined her head towards the young family once more as they collected their things and moved along to the next tee.

“Oh…” was all that Hazel said, her face pensive.

“What? What’s wrong?” said Mercy, rubbing Hazel’s back.

“Nothing, nothing’s wrong. We have talked about it and we both want kids… like… soon.”

“Haze, that’s great! Have you talked to Zeke about it yet? Are you guys looking into donors? What about—”

“Whoa, whoa. Slow down, Merc,” said Hazel, holding her hands up defensively, “we haven’t taken any of those steps yet. We’ve only just both gotten onto the ‘we want kids’ page, but I really don’t know if we’re ready yet.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” exclaimed Mercy, “you two are gonna be amazing moms.”

“But look at us Merc,” said Hazel.

“Look at what? The endless love? The stable careers? The huge, loving and supporting family?” scoffed Mercy, “oh yeah, truly a terrible environment to bring a child into.”

“Mercy,” exclaimed Hazel, “we’re barely adults ourselves. We still mess around like kids. We play pranks on each other. Hell, I want to go for a night out and I pick fucking mini-golf! What kind of—”

Mercy shot her hand out, putting a finger to Hazel’s lips to cut her off. “Okay, first: watch your mouth, I’d rather those kids don’t pick up our guttermouth. Second: who said there is anything wrong with having fun like kids? If you have fun like kids, then you can have fun  _ with  _ kids. It means you have joy in your life. I know you’re worried about being a good mom, but worrying about it means you’re already a good step in the right direction, but you can’t stop having fun. You start to become too rigid and controlling and you end up like your grandparents.“ A shadow passed over Mercy’s face. “Hateful and bitter old husks who don’t deserve the title of ‘family’.”

The two sat in tense silence for several moments, tears running down each of their faces, as Mercy’s words sank in. Hazel opened and closed her mouth as she tried to think of something to say, but the words wouldn’t form. Eventually, she settled on just leaning forward and pulling Mercy into a hug.

“Thank you.”

Mercy squeezed Hazel back before breaking away and standing up. “No thanks necessary. You’re my sister and I love you. You know I’ll always be here for you.”

“Yeah,” said Hazel, wiping her eyes, “alright, enough of this sentimental stuff. Looks like they’re far enough ahead that we won’t get held up again, time to finish kicking your butt.”

“Excuse me?” said Mercy, “last I checked, I was ahead by two strokes. I believe it is your butt that is being whupped.”

“I’m just lulling you into a false sense of security. It’s all part of my master plan.”

“Well, let’s just see how well your master plan holds up,” said Mercy as she put her ball down and swung.

x-x-x

“Alright, I have to admit,” said Mercy, dipping a chip in the tray of molten cheese, “that was a pretty good master plan.”

“I thought so,” said Hazel with her mouth full, “having to work in three dimensions makes the eighteenth hole trickier, but it still boils down to geometry.”

“I don’t think you’re supposed to bank your shot off the gnome’s forehead,” said Mercy, “but I won’t argue results.” Mercy held up a chip, which Hazel toasted with her own. “So what now, you won so it’s your choice?”

“Let’s head upstairs to the arcade, really get into that childhood spirit.”

“I like it, let’s go.”

They quickly cleaned up their table and headed up into the arcade, taking in the sight of a multitude of older arcade cabinets, pinball machines and ticket games.

“Ooh, DDR,” said Mercy, “good thing Sky isn’t here. We’d never be able to pull her away from that thing. You up for a round?”

“Nah, not really in the mood to flail around embarrassingly tonight.”

“As opposed to all those other night’s when you’re really craving getting a good flailing-about in?”

“Hey, I don’t judge your foreplay rituals.”

“Hey, hey, hey. If I can’t make sex jokes, you can’t either,” said Mercy, “besides… ew.”

“Fine,” conceded Hazel before spotting the skee-ball and dragging Mercy towards it, “this one. I love skee-ball.”

“Alright, I’m game,” said Mercy, dropping in a couple tokens, “you any good?”

Hazel grabbed a ball and sped it up the lane, sinking it into the centre. “Become one with the gnome.”

Mercy laughed and launched her ball up the lane.

x-x-x

It was late when Mercy, sleepy but happy, walked into her and Sky’s shared bedroom. Sky, who was already sitting in bed reading a book, looked up at her wife with a smile.

“Hey you,” said Sky, “where’ve you been?”

“Hazel decided that we needed a night out, so she kidnapped me.”

“Well, that much I knew, she texted me before she snatched you, but where’d you guys end up?”

“Oh, we went and played mini-golf down at the fun centre.”

“Without me?” Sky pouted.

“Yes.” Mercy glowered with a smirk at Sky. “How was your sushi dinner, by the way?”

Sky narrowed her eyes at Mercy. “It was fantastic. Mom and I had a blast.” Sky glowered as Mercy’s expression grew smugger, “Dang it, stop being right about things.”

“You love it,” said Mercy, crawling up on the bed to give Sky a quick peck on the lips, “oh, I got you a present.”

“Oh? What?”

Mercy reached into her pocket and pulled out small, plastic, siren whistle, handing it to Sky who looked at it dumbly. “I won it just for you at skee-ball.”

“Oh, I… love it,” said Sky, bringing it to her lips and blowing, filling the room with the whirring sound.

They both kept their serious expressions for about three seconds before bursting into laughter.

“So yeah, apparently I’m not that great at skee-ball,” said Mercy as she got up and got changed into her pyjamas.

“It’s not easy, though Hazel is good. She must’ve made out like a bandit.”

“She did, thousands of tickets,” said Mercy, getting under the covers, “but while she was deciding, some kids we saw earlier were fawning over some of the big prizes, so she just gave her tickets to them. They ended up getting a huge panda.”

“Aww, that’s so sweet,” said Sky as wrapped her free arm around Mercy, “well, I’m glad you guys had fun. You two deserved some bonding time.”

“Same for you and your Mom,” said Mercy sleepily, “love you, Babe.”

“Love you, too”

Mercy snuggled closer and began to drift off as Sky continued to read.

After dozing for a few minutes however, Mercy’s eyes opened once more. “Hey, Sky?”

“Yeah, Merc?”

“What do you think about having kids?”


	40. Knit One; Snarl Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carmilla goes to Sue for knitting lessons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow-up to the events of Detonation Anxiety

Sue was quietly reading a book in her living room when a knock came from the front door.

“Paul?” she called, “are you expecting anyone?”

He popped his head out of the kitchen. “Nope. Maybe it’s a package.”

“Maybe. I’ll get it,” she said, already most of the way to the door.

When she opened it, she found a nervous looking Carmilla, wringing her hands on the doorstep.

“Carmilla,” exclaimed Sue, stepping forward to hug her daughter-in-law, “what brings you by? You should know that you don’t have to knock by now.” Sue kept an arm around the woman, leading her into the house.

“I know and I normally would, but I wanted to ask you something so it felt rude to just barge in and start demanding things.”

“Nonsense,” said Sue, “you’re family. Now come on. I know for a fact Paul just brewed a fresh pot.” She led Carmilla back into the living room and sat her down on the couch before going and fixing them both cups of coffee. “There you go. Two bloods and no sugar, just the way you like it.”

“Thanks, but where did you get blood? Is Paul okay? Paul, she didn’t stab you for blood did she?” she called back to him.

“I’m fine,” he responded, “a little super-glue fixes an open wound right up.”

“Oh hush you,” scolded Sue, “we try to keep a couple blood bags on hand. Never know when a vampiric family member is going to drop by for coffee.” Sue gave Carmilla a wink. “So, what’s on your mind?”

Carmilla hesitated, looking uncomfortable. “Uh,” she started softly, “can you teach me how to knit?”

Any response Sue could make was cut off by a loud guffaw from Paul in the next room.

“One second dear,” said Sue with a dangerously sweet smile before getting up and walking into the kitchen.

Shortly thereafter a pronounced ‘smack’ and a yelp of “ow” came from the same direction. A couple minutes later, Sue returned carrying a large covered basket. Lifting the lid, she began to produce colourful rolls of yarn and large knitting needles from the basket’s contents.

“So why the sudden interest in the yarnly arts?” asked Sue as she dug through the basket.

“Well…” said Carmilla, hesitating again, “it’s kind of embarrassing.”

“More embarrassing than the bad-ass vampire learning how to knit?” teased Paul from the other room right before another loud ‘smack’ rang out, “ow! Oh, hey Zach. I didn’t hear you come in.”

Sue rolled her eyes and left them to their conversation, smiling at Carmilla expectantly.

“It was Laf's idea actually,” Carmilla said, smiling at Sue's look of surprise, “I suspect they may have been joking, but I wasn't about to discard it on that merit alone.”

“Why did LaFontaine of all people suggest you take up knitting?”

“Do you remember a few weeks ago? That huge ‘boom’ that came from the lake?”

“Yeah. Paul and I went to have a look, but there was no one there. We figured some kids must’ve been messing around with firecrackers or something stupid like that.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Well, you’re close. Laf took me to the lake to help me blow off some steam with some wonderfully explosive stuff from their lab.”

“Making steam to blow off steam?” said Sue, making Carmilla chuckle.

“Something like that.”

“So what was the source of said steam, if you don’t mind my asking.”

Carmilla bit her lip and blushed. “It’s kinda stupid.”

“All the more reason to get it into the open,” said Sue, putting a hand on Carmilla’s shoulder “odds are you’ll find someone can find someone to be stupid together with.”

Carmilla smiled and shrugged. “Alright, fair enough.” She hesitated, finding the words. “Do you ever get jealous when your grandkids spend time with someone who isn’t you?”

“Yes. So, what’s the stupid thing?”

“That is the stupid thing.”

“That’s a stupid thing to think is stupid.”

“What? Really? Well I still feel stupid, even if the stupid thing is stupid.”

“Who’s on first?” called Zach from the other room. 

_ Smack _

“Ow”

Both men broke out laughing as Sue glared at the door before turning back to Carmilla. “My point is that wanting to spend time with your grandkids, or great-grandkids, or anyone whom you love is natural so it stings a bit when they spend time with someone who’s not you. I know I certainly felt it when you left your little ones with a couple, whom to us, were people whom we were still getting to know.”

Carmilla’s eyes went wide. “Oh my god, Sue. I never even considered that. I’m so sorry, I should have thought—”

“Thought what?” interrupted Sue, “that you should have not let a pair of lovely people, who are essentially your children’s fourth and fifth parents, be a significant part of their lives to save our feelings?”

Carmilla opened her mouth before snapping it shut again, feeling somewhat logically trapped.

“Exactly,” confirmed Sue, “you’ve hardly denied us our family, instead you gave us more. Lafontaine and Perry, and Hazel and Sky are just as much our children and grandchildren as you and your kids are.”

Carmilla smiled warmly at the sentiment. “Well, I must admit. That sounds like a pretty good trade-off. Which begs the question, how did you deal with your frustration?”

“Well, funny you should ask that.” Sue smiled, twirling a pair of knitting needles in her hand before holding them out to Carmilla.

Carmilla met Sue’s grin with one of her own, taking the proffered needles.

“Now be careful. These are wooden needles and I’d prefer you don’t accidentally stake yourself,” Sue joked, laughing at Carmilla’s skeptical expression, “alright, let me show you how to cast on.”

x-x-x

A few hours and a handful of stitch lessons later, the two women were sitting in companionable silence, the only sound being the soft  _ click-click _ of working knitting needles, the boys having wandered off to parts unknown. 

However, it was then that Carmilla came to a stop, staring at her work with a puzzled expression “Uh… Sue?” asked Carmilla, holding up her knitting, “is it supposed to have this little ladder down the middle?”

“‘Fraid not, my dear.” said Sue, “I’m afraid you’ve dropped a stitch.”

“I have?” said Carmilla. Raising her arms, she looked on her lap and around where she was sitting before standing up and fully inspecting the area around her, slowly winding the loose yarn around her legs.

Sue quickly covered her mouth with her own work, trying her hardest not to laugh at the vampire slowly tangling herself up, which continued until Carmilla caught sight of her companion, silently shaking and eyes full of mirth. Looking down at herself, she glared in annoyance at the fuzzy strand entwining her.

“Well that’s just great,” she grumbled, slowly figuring out how to free herself.

“No,no, this is fine,” said Sue, “it’s quite common for cats to become tangled in their yarn.”

Carmilla’s glare was the final straw and Sue just broke down laughing. Carmilla simply huffed and untangled herself before plopping herself back down on the couch.

“Are you done?” she groused, looking mildly hurt as Sue’s laughter petered out.

“Oh dear.” Sue wiped away a tear. “I’m so sorry, honey. It was just right there on a silver platter. I couldn’t help myself.”

“You are so not allowed to get angry next time I make a dog joke.”

“Fair deal.”

“Now, can you please help me with this?” Carmilla looked imploringly at her mother-in-law.

“Of course,” said Sue, “now, your stitch didn’t fall off. It’s right here.” Sue twiddled the loop of yarn hanging off the back of Carmilla’s knitting. “Now, this is really common and completely fixable. It happens to me all the time, usually when I’m carrying a project around. First, get your left needle under that bottom rung and pull it up…”

x-x-x

“Honey, I’m home,” Carmilla said in a monotone as she walked into her living room where her wives were watching TV, Laura laying with her head in Danny’s lap.

“Truly, it’s like I’m in the room with Ward Cleaver himself,” said Danny, mirroring Carmilla’s deadpan expression.

“Your joke would ring truer if you’d actually been alive when that show was on the air,” jabbed Carmilla with a smile as she dropped onto the couch next to Danny

“Not all of us can be older than dirt, dead girl,” rebutted Danny, sporting an entertained grin of her own as she wrapped an arm around Carmilla, “so where’ve you been hiding all day. You missed a couple of great vintage hockey games.”

“I was over at your parents’ house” said Carmilla, to Danny’s visible surprise.

“What were you doing over there?” asked Laura, her head comically tilted upside down to look at Carmilla.

“This!” said Carmilla triumphantly, holding up a small purple square, with only slightly uneven sides and a mere two or three noticeable gaps in the weave.

“Great,” said Danny, “what is it?”

“It’s… uh… it’s a hot pad!” said Carmilla, “y’know, to go under hot dishes. I knitted it.”

Both of her wives looked at her like she’d grown a second head.

“You knit?” asked Laura.

“I do now,” Carmilla replied proudly, holding the square up again, “I got Sue to help me out. I’m going back next weekend for more.”

“You got Mom to… wait, is this about that whole grandchild thing?” asked Danny, “huh, I thought you were joking about the whole knitting thing.”

“Same here, to be honest,” admitted Laura.

“I think I was a little,” said Carmilla, “I honestly wasn’t certain, but I was feeling itchy today so I decided to go try. I figured even if I hated it, what’s one wasted afternoon in three hundred and seventy-ish odd years of life.”

“But I guess you liked it,” said Laura.

“I did. It’s soothing… and quiet, I like the quiet part.”

“And it gives you an excuse to sit around and do nothing for hours… well, more of an excuse,” teased Danny, drawing a glower.

“O-kay,” intervened Laura, levering herself into a standing position “as fun as this is, it’s getting late and we haven’t had dinner yet. I’m in the mood for spaghetti, anyone want something different?”

A pair of shaking heads answered her question. She gave them a thumbs up and headed for the kitchen.

“C’mon,” said Danny as she stood up, “let’s go give her a hand making dinner.” She took Carmilla’s hand, helping her off the couch. “And tell you what, we can use the hot pad on the table for the spaghetti.”

Carmilla lit up, a hopeful smile on her face before coughing, schooling her features to something a little more reserved. “Yeah, we can do that, y’know, if you want to.”

Danny smiled, and hugged Carmilla close, “yeah, I want to.” She kissed the top of Carmilla’s head and the two went to join Laura in the kitchen, brand new hot pad in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How to write skills you do not possess yourself: 1) Google it. 2) Read just enough for a basic understanding 3) only describe the first action and then let the scene trail off, letting the skill play out “off camera” 4) repeat ad nauseum
> 
> Hope y'all enjoyed
> 
> -Juniper


	41. A Matter of Taste

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, some foods won't agree with everyone's palate.

“What the hell is this?”

“It’s jello, you eat it.”

Carmilla watched in amusement as Laura spat the stolen spoonful of gelatin into the sink.

“I realize that it was jello. Why is it made of blood?”

Carmilla simply responded by raising an eyebrow at her wife.

“Alright, stupid question. Let me rephrase: why didn’t you warn me it was made of blood?”

“Well, it’s not like you really asked before you snuck a spoonful, but I’ll be honest. It was funny.”

Laura glared at Carmilla for a moment. “I am so putting garlic into your shampoo.”

“We use the same shampoo, cupcake.”

Laura’s face scrunched up in annoyance.

“Still hilarious…”

Laura huffed, bowing her head in defeat

“Alright, fine. But now I’m curious, why go to the effort of making blood jello in the first place? ‘Blood-O’? ‘Jellood’?”

“I quite like ‘Jell-O Positive’ myself,” said Carmilla.

Laura groaned before going to the cupboard and pulling out a sealed plastic tub holding a small bulb of garlic. “Y’know what? Smelling like an Olive Garden will be worth it,” she said as she made her way towards the stairs.

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry,” begged Carmilla as she ran over and wrapped Laura up in a hug from behind, “I’ll stop being a smartass… for a while. Besides, that was a good one, wasn’t it?”

Laura rested her free arm on Carmilla’s crossing her stomach. “Nnnnggg… fine. Painful as hell, but dammit it was good.” She turned her head, giving Carmilla a peck on the cheek before extricating herself and going to put the garlic back. “But, you haven’t answered my question yet.”

“I’m hoping to make having blood a little more fun for Drix.”

Laura’s expression softened as she sat down at the table. “Aww, that’s sweet of you, but he’s never had any issue drinking blood.”

“I know,” said Carmilla, “but it’s still something that he has to do to stay healthy that Charlie and Mercy don’t. I’m hoping being able to change it up will make it feel like less of a chore.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” said Laura, “getting them to eat their vegetables is hard enough, I really don’t want a round two.”

“What do you mean ‘getting  _ them _ to eat  _ their _ vegetables’?” said Danny as she walked into the room, “last I checked, you were the one who refused to eat her broccoli last night.”

“I keep telling you, broccoli is not food,“ protested Laura, “it’s topiary that got lost and should be returned to its rightful home.”

“Alright Laura,” replied Danny, placing a kiss on top of Laura’s head.

“Hey, don’t talk down to me —Carm, shut up!” Laura added, holding up a finger.

“I didn’t say anything,” said Carmilla innocently.

“You were going to,” said Laura.

“She’s right,” agreed Danny, “you were going to.”

Carmilla shrugged with a grin. “Yeah, I was going to.”

Danny rolled her eyes, kissing the vampire on the cheek before sitting down as well. “Mind if I have a taste?”

Carmilla nudged the bowl towards her, turning it so the spoon was within reach.

“Hmm, not bad,” Danny said after a small spoonful, “I couldn’t see sitting down at the table and enjoying a bowlful, but this’d probably be pretty tasty to a wolf’s pallette.”

Laura lit up. “Oh my god, are you guys thinking what I’m thinking?!”

Her wives just stared at her, dumbstruck. They shared a confused glance before Carmilla turned back to Laura. “I think so Cupcake, but how do we get Laf to wear that much spandex?”

“Yes! Wait, no. Carm!” Laura glowered at her wife before getting excited again. “Blood jigglers! The pups would love them!”

“That’s not a half bad idea, if we get blood from the butcher so we don’t drain our vampire stocks” said Danny, “but please never say the words ‘blood jigglers’ ever again. I know exactly what you mean and it still sounds creepy.”

“Fair enough,” said Laura with a laugh.

“Should be doable” said Carmilla, “the blood didn’t seem to hurt this setting up at all, so it should be just like the normal stuff?”

“Speaking of,” said Laura, “please tell me you made some regular. Blood flavoured or not, there’s going to be fights if only one of them gets jello.”

“Yes, there’s a bowl of strawberry in the fridge as well, ready for dessert… tonight,” she added, as Laura froze midway up from her chair.

“You’re no fun,” said Laura as she dropped back into her seat.

x-x-x

“What the hell is this?

“It’s a brownie, you eat it.”

Carmilla eyed the dessert suspiciously. “You sure? It doesn’t smell right, kind of dull. And this has frosting on it.” She took a bite before immediately spitting it into the sink. “Really bad, oily frosting.”

“Carm, chill,” said Danny, looking annoyed, “it’s from the store. If you don’t like it, you don’t have to eat it.”

“You bought brownies from the store?!” gasped Carmilla, “are you feeling okay? are you sick? do you have a fever?” She pressed a hand to Danny’s forehead.

Danny swatted her off. “I’m fine. I was getting groceries earlier and they had trays of brownies by the check-outs; I bought them on an impulse. They’re alright.”

Carmilla just looked affronted. “I want a divorce.”

“Why are we getting divorced this time?” asked Laura as she walked in, spotting the confection on the table, “ooh, brownie.”

“Wait, Laura—” said Carmilla, too late as Laura took a big bite.

Halfway through her first chew, Laura stopped and glared at the brownie in her hand like it had shot her father. Without any hesitation, she walked straight over to the garbage, spitting out her mouthful and throwing the uneaten brownie in after it.

“Hey! I was enjoying that!” said Danny.

Laura looked back at her sadly, “oh… no. No, you weren’t.” Laura strode over to her wife, wrapped her arms around Danny’s neck and began rocking her back and forth gently, ignoring Danny’s incredulous expression.

“Would you cut it out?” asked Danny, trying in vain to pry the smaller woman off of her.

“It’s okay, love,” cooed Laura, “that sub-par confection can’t hurt you anymore.”

Danny gave up on trying to get loose and settled for glaring at Carmilla as she kept being rocked. “You know that both of you used to inhale things like that by the truckload back at Silas.”

“I know,” whispered Laura, “which is exactly why I know you can get past this too. I just takes courage… and help. Carm, make the call.”

“On it!” she said, whipping out her phone, “hey there, I was wondering if you could help us out…” Carmilla wandered into the other room as she continued the conversation, leaving Danny and Laura behind.

“Soooo… how long do you plan to stay latched onto me like this?”

“As long as it takes.”

“To do what?”

“Alright,” said Carmilla, walking back in, “help is on the way.”

“Did they say how long they’d be?”

“No, said they were coming and the line went dead. But they should only be—”

The back door flew open. “We’re here!” called Perry.

“—nearly instantaneous.” Confusion was written all over Carmilla’s face

Perry came into the kitchen, followed by a huffing and puffing LaFontaine, a large plastic container in her white knuckled grip. Without another word, she dropped the container onto the table and headed over to the cupboards, gathering plates

“Don’t ask,” said Laf, doubled over and still catching their breath “I don’t know how either, though I think the neighbourhood may be short a squirrel now, if that blast pattern of fur I saw is any indication.”

“It was fine,” said Perry, putting out plates, “I just grazed it and it ran off.” Once the plates were in front of everyone, she cracked the container open and the rich scent of cocoa filled the kitchen.

“Oh that is so much better,” said Carmilla, relief visible on her face, “you doing okay, frankenstein?”

“Oh yeah,” said Laf, helping Perry serve the treats, “I’m long since over that, thankfully.”

“Which is fortunate, because we have more pressing problems,” said Perry, taking a plate and placing it right in front of Danny, “eat.”

“Perry, I don’t need to be…” Danny’s protest died in her throat as she met Perry’s steely gaze, brooking no argument. “Yes’m”

She set in on her brownie as everyone helped themselves to one as well. The room fell into near silence as everyone tucked in. 

It wasn’t until there were only crumbs left that Carmilla turned to Danny. “Well?”

Everyone waited with baited breath as Danny bit her lip and nodded to herself. “Twas blind, but now I see,” she said.

“Hallelujah!” said Carm.

“Alright, crisis averted,” said Laura, “but what do we do about the rest of that other tray? Garbage seems too good for it.”

“I’ve got an idea,” said Danny, “Carm, you up for some target practice?”

Carm grinned. “Oh, hell yes.

Grabbing the store brownies from the fridge, everyone made their way out onto the deck.

“You ready?” asked Danny.

“Pull!” yelled Carmilla, prompting Danny to pull back and fling the tray high into the sky like a frisbee.

Carmilla followed it with her eyes and seconds later, the store-made met its fate in a burst of flame, flashing into ashes in moments.

x-x-x

“What the hell is this?”

“It’s garlic bread, you eat it.”

Danny stared at Laura incredulously.

“I see. So you’ve finally snapped and are trying to murder our wife?”

“No, not yet. And besides, even if I was, I wouldn’t be quite this obtuse about it.”

“I should hope not. Nothing’s quite as off-putting as a poorly planned murder.”

“I know, right? I mean, if you’re going to go to the trouble, at least put in the effort. If you couldn’t at least base a decent crime procedural on it, why even bother showing up?”

“So if Carmilla’s imminent end isn’t in the cards, then what’s up?”

“Well, Mattie came by earlier and asked Carm to join her for the weekend. Some kind of big to do in New York.”

“And we weren’t invited,” said Danny with a frown.

“We were, but do you really want to go to something Mattie would think of as a ‘big event’.”\

Danny stared off into space for a moment before shuddering. “No. No, I would not… You don’t think Carm would…”

“No. Maim someone maybe,” mused Laura, “but I think unless the impossible happens and someone or thing is able to threaten Mattie, she’ll be fine, and in that case it’d be kinda justified.”

“Good point. And so you’ve decided to indulge her absence by eating garlic bread?”

“Oh not just garlic bread. We’ve got the rest of the weekend to air this place, and ourselves, out, so I’ve gone whole hog on this,” said Laura, a glint in her eye, ”Roasted garlic and goat cheese, pesto linguine, french fries with roast garlic aioli, the garlic bread and tiramisu for dessert.”

“There’s no garlic in that.”

“Do you honestly want me to make a garlic dessert?”

“Well, no. I’m just pointing out that it’s off theme.”

“Tough. Now I’ve got almost everything ready, all that’s left is boiling the pasta and baking the fries.”

“Baking? You using freezer fries?”

Laura laughed. “Not quite so basic. I hand cut them, but we don’t have a fryer and I’m not messing about with a pot of hot oil. That’s a stench I really don’t want to have to deal with alongside the garlic.”

“Good thinking. Do you want me to set the table?”

“Nah, most of the stuff is good appy style. We’ll plate up some pasta and watch a movie.”

“Sounds great, what did you…” Danny trailed off as she heard the front door open.

“Hey, I’m back. I—” started Carmilla before descending into a coughing fit, “what the hell?!”

“It sounds like Carm might be back from her weekend early,” said Danny, meeting Laura’s worried gaze.

The two of them waited but the vampire didn’t appear. A minute later, there was a knocking on the glass and they turned to see Carmilla glaring at them from the deck.

“I think we’re in trouble,” said Laura.

“ _ We’re _ in trouble?” replied Danny.

“Yep, I’m taking you down with me.”

“I’m touched,” said Danny, making her way outside, “hey Carm, what happened? Laura said you were headed for New York with Mattie.”

“The limo she ordered broke down, so we were going to delay until tomorrow.”

“Oh Carm, I’m sorry,” Danny said, stepping forward to hug her wife, who shied away. “It’s okay, I haven’t eaten any yet.” She stepped forward again and this time was able to wrap her arms around the vampire.

“Well, I guess you didn’t completely start celebrating my absence,” she said, a bit bitterly.

“Hey now,” said Danny, holding Carmilla a little tighter, “you know it’s not like that.”

“Hey Carm,” broached Laura, getting their attention, “I’d come hug you too, but I’ve been cooking all afternoon. I’m steeped in garlic right now.”

Carmilla chuckled a little. “I can tell. I can smell you from here.”

“I’m so sorry. It didn’t even occur to me you might need to come back. I kinda figured Mattie would whisk you away on some grand adventure and we’d have time to air things out.”

“Well, ideally that’s what would have happened,” said Mattie, stepping out of the house and making Laura jump, “though I think you went a little overboard darling. Pomme frites with Linguine? How very gauche.

“How did you get in there?” asked Danny.

“Carmilla left the door open when she came around, so I let myself in.”

“No, I mean, the garlic.”

“Please, pup. I can shrug off stakes, you think a seasoning is going to have any effect on me? Hell, if we tossed kitty cat in there, I doubt it’d do any worse than annoy her.”

“You’ll forgive me if I’m not all that eager to test out that theory,” said Laura, unconsciously moving herself between Carmilla and the open door.

Mattie smiled at the motion. “You know, you and I are really going to have to spend some time together. If we’re going to be spending eternity together, we really should be better friends. Same goes for you, pup.

Danny smirked. “Hey, you’re family, remember? Just come on by, anytime.

Mattie grinned. “Excellent darling, I may just take you up on that. Though maybe when you have a different menu. Which reminds me, kitty cat, our plans can resume as scheduled. I found a helicopter that can take us and we won’t even be an hour late for the party. There’s a cab waiting to take us to the airport out front”

Carmilla perked up. “Oh good. I was worried I was going to have to beg a night on the couch from Laf and Perry.”

“They’d have welcomed you, but I think this is better,” said Danny, “you deserve some fun.”

“And don’t worry, I’ll make sure the house is aired out by the time you get home sunday,” said Laura sheepishly.

“Sounds good,” said Carmilla. She kissed Danny on the cheek before quickly moving up and pecking Laura, making a face as she withdrew again, much to Laura’s amusement, “alright Mattie, let’s go.”

“I’ll meet you around front. Ta darlings,” said Mattie as she headed back through the house.

“Show off,” muttered Carmilla, before looking at her wives, “love you two. Enjoy our dinner.” She made her way back around the house.

“Have fun, Carm,” said Laura, “I love you, too!”

“Love you!” chimed in Danny, before turning back to Laura, “c’mon, we’ve got a gauche dinner to eat. Pick a movie and I’ll make us some plates.”

“Sounds great,” said Laura as they re-entered the house and shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got this one started using a random prompt from writing-prompt-s on tumblr (The opening two lines). Very useful and interesting blog to follow if you like to write.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed this one. Let us know!
> 
> -Juniper


	42. Striking the Match

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes romance is obvious, sometimes it needs a nudge and sometimes it reveals all.

“Alright everybody, I think that does it for today. For assigned readings, I want everyone to continue through Poe up to the end of the Cask of Amontillado. We'll discuss the covered works next class. Everyone have a good weekend.”

The lecture theatre filled with the usual cacophony of footfalls and zippers as Danny’s students gathered their things to depart. At the front of the room, Danny slowly gathered her notes, taking time to hang back as the usual handful of students came up to ask questions about the lecture or the course. Like most days, this didn’t take more than a couple minutes as she finished gathering her things, most of the inquiries were simple or could be deferred to her office hours, where she was better equipped to deal with the more complex issues of both course and content. That was the nice part about Friday classes, her students typically wanted to start the weekend just as much as she did and so were just as happy to keep things short and sweet.

Danny slipped out into the hallway just as the next class started filing their way in. Weaving in and out of the surging crowd, she quickly ducked into the nearest stairwell and ascended to the comparable quiet of the offices above. Turning the final corner, she saw a familiar figure sitting on the floor beside her door, immersed in a book.

“Well, hello Rodney,” said Danny, cheekily smiling as she hung her head upside-down into his field of vision.

“Oh!” said Rodney, snapping his textbook closed, “hello Professor Lawrence!”

Danny gave him an amused look. “Rodney, you’re not one of my students or even in college yet… and you’re Sky’s best friend to boot. You don’t have to call me Professor.”

Rodney blushed. “Oh, uh, right. Sorry,” he stammered, clutching his things to his chest as he stood up, “I guess I’m a bit nervous. I was wondering if I could ask you a favour.”

“Sure,” she said warmly, pulling out her keys and opening the door, “come on in.” Danny gestured to the chair in front of her desk as she dropped a pile of folders onto the corner. “So how can I help?” She dropped into her chair, relieved to get off of her feet for a few minutes.

“Well, I’m trying to get into the performing arts program here. They have a choreography diploma that I want to go after.”

“And a reference from a member of the faculty would be a boost for your application,” supplied Danny.

Rodney nodded, looking at her hopefully.

Danny sized him up for a moment. “I think I can help you with that. I’ve seen how hard you work with Sky so I’d be happy to provide a reference, for as much worth a reference from someone who doesn’t know a pirouette from a plié can be.”

“Well, you pronounced both words,” joked Rodney, “that’s enough to get invited to the secret society meetings. Well, that and the blood sacrifice.”

“Hey, sounds good. I’ve got a kid to spare. Do I have to bring my own cloak?”

“Nah, they’re provided. Lined with lambswool, very swank.”

“Damn, our clandestine literary guild only sprang for linen. That’s what happens when you have to buy so many leather bound tomes.”

“Yeah, but would the unholy texts really have the same feel on an e-reader?”

“No. There’s nothing quite like that shiver of fear you get as you turn the page. They just can’t capture that digitally.”

“Exactly. I’d say it’s worth the compromise.”

“Fine, we’ll make due,” Danny said before they both broke into laughter, “oh my. So, how soon did you need the reference?”

“It’s not urgent. The application for early admittance isn’t due for a couple months yet. I’m just crossing my I’s and dotting my T’s now so I have time.”

“Smart. Alright, talk to me next week and I should have a letter that you can use.”

“Great, thanks Prof—” Rodney paused at her raised eyebrow. “Thanks Danny, I really appreciate it,” Rodney said, getting up.

“Not a problem, take care.”

“You too. See ya next week.” 

Rodney opened the door and out into the hallway, nearly walking straight into another young man, his hand raised to knock. Both men jumped a little in surprise, each turning a bit red at the proximity of the other.

“Oh, uh, excuse me.”

“Ah, sorry!”

Danny couldn’t help but smile at the adorable interaction as the two jockeyed around each other. She ended up having to bite her lip to keep from laughing as they each ended up glancing back at the other.

“Xavier,” called Danny, getting the newcomer’s attention.

He snapped back towards her, blushing deeper at having been caught gawking. “Hey, Aunt Danny,” he said sheepishly as he walked into the office.

“Hey there, whatcha doing here?” she asked, checking her watch “we’re not supposed to meet to drive home for another hour yet.”

“My last class was cancelled so I figured I’d come by to see if you wanted to just head home early.”

“Hmm… let me check my schedule.” Danny flipped open her daytimer and dropped her finger onto the page without even looking. “Would ya look at that? It’s says ‘let’s get the heck outta dodge’.” Danny quickly grabbed her coat and briefcase and led the way out the door

“That’s a very specific entry,” said an amused Xavier.

“It oughta be. Took me forever to actually find a paper scheduling book.”

“Why bother with it at all? Why not just use your phone?”

Danny smirked, amused at the echo of her previous conversation. “You think a joke like that would land on a smartphone. Hell no. Comedy like that has gotta be earned”

Xavier laughed. “I mean for your schedule.”

“Oh, well I do.” She held up her phone, showing off a mildly crowded calendar app.

“Ooh, date night tonight!”

Danny shut off the phone and narrowed her eyes at him, receiving a cheeky smile in return. “I like the daytimer as an affectation. I’ve had it for years and even new, it was out of date. But, it makes me feel like a real prof to have things like that around. Bit of an odd quirk, I suppose.”

“No, it makes sense,” mused Xavier, “a lot of my profs only have a computer in their office. I don’t know why, but it’s kinda hard to take them seriously. Like I’m talking with an HR rep, not my educator.”

“Glad to know my efforts aren’t completely wasted then,” she said as they left the building and started heading up one of the pedestrian malls to the faculty parking.

“So, Aunt Danny… who was that?” Xavier asked cautiously.

Danny fought to keep the knowing smile from rising to her face. Calmly, she kept her sight ahead and pace steady. “Who was what, X?”

“That guy who left your office as I arrived.”

“Oh, the one you were watching walk away?” she asked innocently.

Xavier coughed, ears turning bright pink. “Uh, yeah.”

“Oh that was just Sky’s friend Rodney. He popped by to ask for a favour.”

“Sky’s friend?” he asked, hopefully, “from her dance stuff?”

“Yeah, he’s her partner, more often than not,” said Danny before dropping her voice conspiratorially, “and he’s very good.”

Xavier’s head at this point resembled a tomato with hair, much to Danny’s amusement. “Oh… is that so…”

“Yes. Y’know, we don’t see him much. Sky kinda keeps her dance friends separate, but he still comes by from time to time. I could probably get Sky to invite him along next time we have a family dinner.”

“Oh well, y’know, if you really want to. I suppose…”

“Yeah,” said Danny as they reached her truck, “I think that sounds fun. It’ll be nice for all of us to see him.”

“Yeah, sounds great,” said Xavier, a touch too eagerly as he got in and closed the door.

x-x-x

“So, like, being a freshman is really stressful compared to high school; I mean, I’ve heard they’re trying to weed people out, though that’s just a rumour. I find though, the stress isn’t that bad cause I really like most of my courses…” said Xavier excitedly as beside him, on the couch, Rodney hung onto his every word.

Danny watched clandestinely from across the room, doing her best to not draw attention to the pair. However, it became obvious that her efforts were not completely successful as Carmilla dropped onto the couch beside her.

“Okay, what’s going on?” asked Carmilla, “you look like the cat who’s gotten away with the cream, which is obviously my job. So, what’s got you hornin’ in on my territory?”

Danny smirked sidelong at her wife before indicating towards the pair across the room with the barest tilt of her head. Carmilla looked over, before snapping her gaze away, the barest hints of blushes on their cheeks telling her everything she needed to know.

“Huh,” she said softly, nuzzling into Danny’s neck to make it easier to talk quietly, “so that’s what you’re up to. I wondered why you were making him join us just to pick up a letter.”

“I didn’t  _ make _ him do anything,” retorted Danny, “I just mentioned to Sky that coming by my office is out of his way and it might be nice for him to join us for dinner. If doing that means that certain sparks just might start flying, I can think of worse outcomes.”

“So Sky doesn’t know the real reason you invited him?”

“The letter is a real reason,” she defended, catching Carmilla’s disbelieving stare from below, “but no, she doesn’t know. No one does, besides us, X, and possibly Rodney —he was apparently rather eager to accept the invitation— but I didn’t want them under a microscope. If it works, great, but if not, it stays between them.”

“Except for the meddling aunt.”

“I’m just facilitating a meeting, whatever else happens is up to them.”

“Uh-huh,” replied Carmilla, skeptically.

“I don’t know about anyone else,” said Paul, getting everyone’s attention, “but who’s up for a run?”

Danny grinned as she stood and stretched. The night was going well and a run would feel fantastic. Plus, if she was right, the absent pack would give her little… project... a bit more privacy. She took another glance towards the pair to see a very confused looking Rodney and worried Xavier.

“A run? It’s freezing out there…” he was muttering.

Danny’s stomach dropped and she whipped her head around to Sky, who was also wearing a worried expression. As calmly as possible, Danny crossed the room and sat at Sky’s side.

“He doesn’t know about the pack, does he?” she asked quietly.

“No, he’s never needed to,” said Sky, frustration evident in her voice, “it’s one of the reasons I keep most of my dance friends separate, so I don’t have to worry about exposing us. I can’t believe that it didn’t occur to me that it might be an issue.”

“It’s fine, Sky,” comforted Danny, “it was my idea to invite him, I should have asked.” Danny paused in thought. “Do you think he can be trusted with it? Or handle it for that matter? We can still get him out of here. It’ll be hard to explain, but doable.”

Sky chewed on her lip as she thought for a moment. “I think he’ll be fine, provided he doesn’t see everyone change at once. Where’s Mercy?”

“Right behind you,” said Mercy from where she was leaning over the back of the couch, “what do you need me to do?”

“Go close the blinds, it’ll hide everyone shifting in the yard. Auntie Dan’, can you get Uncle Zach? I think we might need him.”

“You already have him,” said Danny, nodding over to where Zach had taken a seat beside his son and was chatting with Rodney, holding the young man’s attention.

“Oh, well that was easy,” Sky said, watching as the rest of the family made their way out the kitchen door. Carmilla, the last one out gave them a quick salute before heading out and shutting the door behind her.

Taking a deep breath, Sky gathered her courage and walked over to sit on Rodney’s other side. She smiled at her uncle and cousin, receiving encouraging looks in return before turning to her friend, placing a hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

“Rodney… there’s a part of my life that I’ve been… well, not dishonest about, since nothing like this has ever actually come up… but kept secret, I suppose is the best way to put it.” 

She paused, trying to read his expression. He seemed apprehensive, but also curious. Hoping that was a good sign, she continued. 

“My family… has always been… different. I’ve kept it close to keep them safe, though I always figured I’d tell you at some point; you’re my best friend. While catching you off guard like this was never my intention, I can’t say it’s entirely unwelcome.”

“Alright. I can appreciate that,” said Rodney after a moment,” so, what’s the big secret? Lay it on me.”

Sky gestured to Mercy, who was kneeling on the floor beside the couch. She smiled nervously at Rodney before her form changed, leaving a very large, red furred wolf, in the middle of the living room floor. Rodney’s eyes went wide as she dropped herself flat against the floor, trying to look as nonthreatening as possible.

“She changed... into a wolf,” said Rodney, staring into the puppy dog eyes Mercy was giving him, “she’s… a werewolf?” Rodney turned his question to Sky.

“Well, she’s certainly not an animorph,” joked Sky, drawing an annoying gruff from the wolf.

“How?” he asked, “was she bitten?”

“It’s genetic,” interjected Danny.

Rodney looked confused for another moment before realization dawned on his face. He looked from Danny to Zach before falling on Xavier, who smiled softly at him.

“Well, I have to say,” said Rodney, nodding amicably, “I’m actually somewhat relieved.”

“Oh?” asked Xavier.

“Well, with that lead in I was worried I’d stumbled into a vampire coven.” He laughed at his own joke before realizing he was alone. “What?”

“Well,” said Danny, “there’s one other thing you should probably know…”

x-x-x

“Hey Professor Lawrence!” said Rodney, poking his head into her open office door.

“Hey Rodney,” she said, “but we’ve talked about this. You don’t need to call me Professor. You’re Sky’s… no, you’re family.”

He grinned back at her. “Normally, I’d agree with you. However, I just got this from Admissions so it felt appropriate,” he said, holding up a torn open envelope with the University’s seal emblazoned on the corner.

“You got in?!” exclaimed Danny, jumping out of her chair.

“I got in!”

She strode around her desk and pulled him into a crushing hug.

“We need to do something to celebrate,” she said, “we’ll throw a party tonight!”

“That’s a great idea, but I’ll have to take a rain check. I already have plans to celebrate.”

“Oh?” asked Danny curiously.

“I’m meeting X after his class and he’s taking me to this little diner near campus.”

Danny burst out laughing. “I wondered why he didn’t need a ride today. You two have an amazing time, you’ve earned it.”

“We have, but it was still nice to have a little help.”

“Hey, the reference was easy.”

“Wasn’t talking about that,” he said slyly.

“But what… oh,” she said, realizing she’d been found out.

“Have a good night, Professor Lawrence,” he said, walking back out of the office.

All she could do was chuckle as she grabbed her own bag and headed home for the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This universe doesn't present many oppotunities to do cute "how we met" stories, so I knew I had to take advantage the moment the idea popped into my head (or rather the moment I came across my own comment in Family Disney Adventures wondering how these two got together. I guess I know now :D)
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed.
> 
> -Juniper


	43. Someone to Watch Over Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Laf goes searching for their favourite mug, they find something overlooked

Lafontaine walked down the stairs with a contented yawn, tying up the sash on their housecoat. “Mornin’ Perr.”

“Good Morning, sweetie!” chimed Perry as she buzzed around the kitchen. On the counters around her, she appeared to have at least three different bowls on the go, “are the kids up yet?”

“Nah,” said Laf, looking back up the stairs, “still sawing logs. But it’s Saturday, if they want to sleep in, I’m not about to wake ‘em.”

“Well, I certainly agree that they can sleep if they want to,” said Perry, pouring a dollop of vanilla into one of the bowls, “but I have a feeling they’ll be up before long.” She smirked as she spun a rubber spatula in her hand and began folding the mixture together.

Laf made a beeline for their wife, gently hugging her about the shoulders from behind and placing a kiss on her cheek. “Whatcha makin’?”

“Pancakes with scrambled eggs and homemade sausage,” she replied, pointing to the three bowls in question.

“You're too good to us,” said Laf, nuzzling into her neck, “can I help at all?”

“Not at the moment, sweetie,” she replied, leaning into their embrace, “if you just want to get yourself some coffee and keep me company, I'd love that.”

“Can I skip the coffee and just keep you company from right here?” They gave her another squeeze.

“As lovely as that sounds, it'll be a bit hard to make breakfast with my arms pinned to my sides,” she said, turning her head to meet their eyes, which seemed to sparkle when she met them.

“Sounds good, let's begin immediately.”

“But then what will our darling daughters eat for breakfast.”

“We've got instant oatmeal in the pantry. We can keep them company together while they microwave it.”

“Oh, you're terrible,” teased Perry, swatting their arm.

“You love me,” they smarmed right back, placing another playful kiss on her cheek before letting her loose to go find their mug.

They wandered over to the cupboard, looking for their favourite mug; a gift Hazel and Sky had gotten for them a couple of years ago. The girls had gotten an electron microscope image of a couple of their hairs put onto the mug along with the caption: ‘Happy Birthday, from your two hairs’. Lafontaine had simultaneously choked up and doubled over laughing and promptly declared it their one mug, forsaking all others.

Unfortunately, it seemed to be missing from the cupboard this morning. Shrugging, they closed the cupboard and wandered over to the dishwasher and began searching through the rack for their absent mug.

“Something wrong, sweetie?” asked Perry.

“Just can’t find my mug.”

“Did you leave it down in the lab again?”

Lafontaine paused in their search, a chagrined smile working its way onto their face. “Yes, I think I may have done just that. Pardon me, would you?”

Perry chuckled. “Of course, of course.”

Lafontaine headed down into their lab, not bothering to turn on the lights as they made a beeline for their desk where they switched on a small lamp so they wouldn’t have to rummage around completely blind. There, on the corner of the desk, they found exactly what they were looking for. What they didn’t expect was for their mug to be looking back at them.

Affixed to the mug, just below the rim, were a pair of plastic googly eyes

Lafontaine shook the mug experimentally, the pupils bouncing around within the decorations with a slight rattle. They cocked their head curiously, wondering where the adornments had come from —they certainly hadn’t put them there— when out of the corner of their eye, they noticed that their mug was not the only item on their desk that had received the anthropomorphic upgrade. From the surface of their desk, their laptop, their stapler, their lamp, every last one of their pencils, everything, was looking right back at them.

Acting on a hunch, they walked back over to the light switches and began flicking them on, one by one. As each bank of lights flickered to life, they revealed a sight that walked the line between hilarious and creepy. All around the room, every single object in the entire room seemed to be watching them. Even the fridge and incubator had been adorned with sets of huge googly eyes the size of saucers. 

As they looked around, they couldn’t help but laugh. Whoever had done this, they hadn’t missed a spot. 

Picking up a nearby beaker, they picked at an eye experimentally, finding that it lifted free with almost no effort, which meant that clean-up would be easy for them, once Lafontaine found out who ‘they’ were.

Mug in hand, they switched the lights back off and ascended back to the ground floor. Back in the kitchen, Perry was working her magic on the griddle, already having produced a small pile of delicious smelling delectables.

“Hey Perr?” they asked, “you wouldn’t happen to know anything about this, would you?”

“About what, swee— why is your mug staring at me?”

“Not certain, but the rest of my lab’s gotten the same treatment.”

Perry frowned at that. “You don’t have anything dangerous on the go, right?”

“Not at the moment, luckily,” they confirmed, “though I’ll have to have a little chat with whomever did this about entering my lab unsupervised. I mean, points for a good prank, but my lab is off-limits most of the time for a reason.”

“Who got poisoned in the lab with what now?” asked Hazel, sleepily descending the stairs in her pyjamas, followed closely by an equally bleary-eyed Sky.

“No one, hopefully,” said Laf, holding the mug towards them, “either of you have anything to do with this?”

Hazel and Sky shared a look before looking back at their parent with concern.

“Uh, yeah,” said Hazel, “we got that for you a few years ago, remember? Were you the one poisoned? Mom, do we need to get Laf to Dr. Antos?”

Laf gave them a confused look of their own before they realized that they were holding the mug the wrong way round. “Oh, not that… this.” They turned the mug so they could see the eyes.

“Sorry Laf, not me,” said Sky with a shrug.

“Me either, though I can take a guess as to the pranksters,” said Hazel, “I won’t name names, but it probably rhymes with ‘Marley and Baron’.”

Lafontaine nodded in agreement as they picked the eyes off the mug and finally got themselves a cup of coffee. “I’ll run by later and talk to Charlie,” they said, getting down mugs for the girls, “but for the moment, your mother has made us all an amazing breakfast, so I think we should sit down and enjoy it.”

“Yes, please,” said Sky, “waking up to breakfast smells is nice, but it makes you ravenous.”

“Well, good thing everything is ready,” said Perry, laying the last plate on the table, “dig in!”

With a clatter of cutlery, the family set in and any thoughts of staring objects were banished for the time being.

x-x-x

Carmilla blinked her eyes as she woke up from her nap. She’d vaguely registered a knock on the door, but wasn’t quite conscious enough yet to really do anything about it. Swinging her legs over the side of the sofa, she scowled at nothing in particular as she continued to wake up.

“Hello? Anyone home?” called Laf.

“Yeah,” replied Carmilla, her voice still hoarse with sleep, “I’m in the living room.” She yawned, stretching herself as she waited for her friend to come into the room.

“Hey Carm, have you seen…” the scientist trailed off as they looked at Carmilla.

“What?” she asked, “have I seen…?”

“Oh, uh, Charlie,” said Laf, covering their mouth to keep from laughing, “though I think you’ve already answered the question I wanted to ask her.”

“Well, she and Aaron were going out earlier, but what do you mean?”

“Umm… maybe go take a look in a mirror.”

Carmilla looked askance at them but followed their suggestion, heading into the bathroom to see what they were talking about. All over her face; haphazardly spaced over her forehead, cheeks and chin; were about a dozen plastic eyes.

“Huh, well that’s a thing,” she said to Laf, who was standing in the doorway, grinning like an idiot, “she do this to you too?”

“Not personally, but my lab looks like the weirdest muppet show right now.”

“Managed to both sneak into your lab and get me while I was sleeping, impressive,” mused Carmilla, “so I guess we have three options. One, we just leave it alone.”

Laf’s only response to that was a deadpan look.

“Right, my thoughts exactly. Two, we ground them… well, Charlie. Can’t really ground Aaron, not my kid.”

“Eh, Elsie would play ball,” said Laf, “but really, that’s overkill. I still want to talk to them about going into my lab, but otherwise this is harmless.”

“Agreed,” said Carmilla, sporting a predatory grin, “which leaves us option number three, retaliation.”

“Now you’re talking.”

x-x-x

“Do you think we got them all?” asked Aaron as he tossed dumped another handful of eyes into the recycling bin.

“All the little ones, I think,” said Charlie, looking around the lab, “Laf said they liked the big ones so we’re leaving them alone.” Charlie gestured over to the large appliances still staring at them, “They said they’re gonna name ‘em.”

“The fridge and incubator?”

“Yep. Makes sense when they can watch you. Dunno what they decided on though.”

“Bert and Ernie, actually,” said Laf, walking into the room, “how you guys making out?”

“Ew, I don’t think your daughter or her brother would appreciate that very much,” joked Aaron.

Laf rolled their eyes and fixed them with a look prompting a laugh from both of them.

“We’re done,” said Charlie, still chuckling, “we didn’t hide any out of sight, so unless we dropped one or two, we’ve got ‘em all.”

“Excellent,” said Laf, clapping her on the shoulder, “this was a good one, but I’ve got both your promise that you won’t come in here without my say so again?

They both nodded, slightly chagrined expressions on their faces.

“Alright good. I don’t really need to be telling your mothers ‘sorry, I accidentally dissolved your kid’. I don’t run fast enough to get away from any of them, or most mobility scooters for that matter, but that’s beside the point.”

“We got it, Laf” Aaron said with a chuckle.

“Alright, you two. Everyone’s upstairs if you wanna come hang out and have a cookie.”

“Sounds good,” said Charlie, heading up the stairs, “what sorta cookies?”

“White chocolate chunk,” said Laf, falling momentarily into a dreamy expression.

“Ooh yummy.”

“There are the two fugitives,” teased Mercy as they stepped out onto the main floor.

“What fugitives?” said Charlie, “I got home and immediately asked Mama if ‘she  _ saw _ what  _ eye _ did?’ Wasn’t exactly trying to cover my tracks.”

“Okay, you’re lucky I wasn’t around for that,” said Danny, “the prank was funny, but I woulda grounded you for a week for those puns.”

“Alright, I guess I’ll just have to  _ watch _ my language around you then,” joked Charlie, prompting groans from the entire room.

“I don’t know this woman and am not associated with her,” said Aaron, visibly backing away from his partner in crime.

“Wise move,” said Danny, narrowing her eyes at her daughter, “now, we’ve been waiting for you two so we can watch a movie. Come find a seat and grab a cookie.”

“Heck yeah,” said Charlie, vaulting the couch, landing beside her mother, “what are we watching?”

“Not sure yet,” said Danny, “your Mama said she had something in mind.”

“So not a disney movie, that’ll be a change of pace,” joked Aaron.

“Maybe later,” said Carmilla as she got up, holding a flash drive which she popped into the side of the TV, “for now I thought it might be fun to watch some old home movies.”

The smiles immediately disappeared from Charlie and Aaron’s faces while everyone else seemed thrilled at the possibility.

“I mean, we went to the trouble of recording them for posterity”—she gave Laura a wink—”would be a shame if we just let them sit around, collecting dust.”

Aaron and Charlie shared a look, already seeing which way the wind was blowing.

“I dunno,” said Aaron, “dust probably gives them character.”

Carmilla gave them a grin scary enough to peel paint. “Nonsense, who knows what gems we might find?” She dropped on the couch beside Laf, who handed her the remote. Quickly navigating the display, she brought up the file menu, quickly moving the cursor to across the screen and settling on a file from about a decade previous.

She clicked it and after a moment of thought, the video started with a near-static shot of the Hollis living room. There was a slight shake indicating the camera was handheld, but otherwise there was no motion. All of a sudden, from a stereo somewhere nearby, started a very familiar drum beat.

“Oh,” commented Laf, “looks like we’re getting disney after all.”

“I believe you're right,” answered Carmilla, bumping fists with LaFontaine

On the screen, in time to the beat, marched a tiny Charlie and Aaron. In the music, there was a rise in the orchestra and the two jumped in place to face the camera.

_Let’s get down to business_  
_To defeat_  
_The Huns _

In the room, the teenage Charlie and Aaron had turned red as everyone else grinned with unbridled glee at the display of adorableness playing out on the screen. The two children onscreen were singing their little hearts out, albeit out of tune. On the couch, Mercy was notably wincing despite the smile on her face.

_ Tranquil as a forest but on fire within _

Little Aaron slapped his hands up above his head, standing straight as possible while Charlie started waving her arms and fingers, obviously trying to act like flames.

“Did you guys choreograph this?” asked Sky, completely delighted.

“Mimed would be more accurate,” said Aaron, chewing on his nails.

“Cute as hell would be most accurate,” said Laura.

“Agreed,” admitted Charlie, “embarrassing, but agreed.”

The video continued up to the course where the two kids started switching off lines

_ Be a man - You must be swift as the coursing river_  
_Be a man - With all the force of a great typhoon _

Aaron was singing the refrain as Charlie posed heroically, singing each reply. At this point, the entire room, the two subjects included, was descending into laughter as the children on the screen got more and more enthusiastic, doing their best to follow the lyrics. At one point they even ‘fought’, which looked more like a hug with arm waving, but it was obvious the camera person wasn’t gonna tell them that,

As the video approached the end of the song, Charlie and Aaron met each other’s eyes, seeming to decide on something. With a shared nod, they jumped up and began singing over their child selves, with a good deal better tuning, as they called and answered through the chorus leading up to the final line.

_ Mysterious as the dark side of… THE MOON _

The two sang with everything they had, finishing in a pose in front of the TV, mirroring the stance of the children on the screen before the movie cut back to the file select screen. Everyone in the room applauded and cheered, Danny going so far as to blow a whistle with her fingers, as the pair bowed enthusiastically.

“I can’t believe you remembered the finishing pose,” said Drix.

“I should hope so, we practiced it enough,” said Aaron, prompting Charlie to smack him lightly, “I mean, we didn’t practice that. It was complete luck.”

Charlie rolled her eyes before setting her sights on Carmilla and Laf, who were sitting arm in arm, wearing matching smug grins. “Well, I hope you both know what this means.”

Carmilla and Laf shared a look, before returning their gaze to the other pair, smiles not having reduced at all.

“Of course we know,” said Laf.

Carmilla held her hand out towards them. “Your move.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so starts what I hope to be a series of chapters of a prank war. They won't be consectutive, or predictable at all, really. I've got a few ideas but just every once in a while, I'll add a chapter of one pair or the other taking the next salvo. If you guys have any ideas or prompts for future pranks, I'd love to hear them. You can drop suggestions into the comments here or over on my tumblr: cheezwhiz-cupcake.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed this one!
> 
> -Juniper


	44. Have it in Hoof

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the wilds around Silas, assisting those in need sometimes requires enlisting less than conventional help.

“Remind me again why you have a centaur tied up in your truck?”

Carmilla watched as Danny struggled to undo the knots keeping the young stallion securely, if haphazardly, in place in the pickup bed. From the middle of the network of ropes, he remained quietly seated, unable to to move enough to help her with the process

“Stupid harpies managed to separate him from his herd yesterday,” Danny said, trying to dig her nails into the knot to loosen it, “though I have to say, you did a bang up job of evading them, kid.” Danny reached forward to ruffle his hair. He made a show of shaking her off, but was beaming with pride at the comment anyhow.

Carmilla rested her chin on her arms as she leaned over the side of the truck, watching with a bored expression. “So if he didn't become harpy food, why is he here and not back at his herdstead?”

He pointed to his foreleg, bandage wrapped and outstretched on an improvised cushion of Danny's jacket. “I ran into the forest to get away,” the youngster started, “but they followed me in. Your forest here is much more open than where we normally range.”

“Yeah,” said Danny, finally making progress on the first knot, “the dryads keep the area fairly orderly. They don't like the plants to choke each other out. It makes it easy to patrol, but it also makes it easy for interlopers to enter unchallenged.”

“Ah, the dryads, that makes sense. They are the reason for our sojourn here. Their herbology is unmatched according to my mentor, so we were seeking them out to trade.”

Carmilla snickered, drawing quizzical looks. She waved them off. “It's nothing.”

Danny continued to eye her girlfriend suspiciously, but the stallion continued, unperturbed, “I managed to lose them as darkness fell, right before I went hoof over haunch into a small gully.”

“Which is where Sumira and Annie happened across him this morning. They bandaged him up as best they could, but getting him somewhere safe on foot was an impossibility. They called me up, I brought the truck in and with a little effort, the three of us were able to help him into the truck bed.”

“Right before you trussed him up like a turkey,” said Carmilla, plucking at one of the still taut ropes, “and here I thought you wanted to keep this sorta stuff between the three of us.”

Danny’s cheeks went bright red. “I had to get him back down to the lodge somehow and the backroads aren’t exactly a smooth ride —I swear Carm, I can already see what you’re going to say, just no— we needed to secure him. Ford didn’t exactly provide seatbelts for ‘three people or one medium sized ungulate’.”

The vampire smirked. “Alright, makes sense. So, what do you need me for?”

“Well, the girls had to keep on their patrol route, and he’s too heavy for me to help out of here by myself…”

“So you need me to be a pack mule for the pack mule…”

“Umm… I’m actually a Bay, not a mule,” he protested quietly.

“Of course, she’s sorry about that,” Danny said, glaring at Carmilla’s eye roll, “and we don’t need to help him long. Just to the dryads’ grove.”

“Ugh, that's nearly a mile from here.”

“Please, Carm?” Danny pleaded, giving the vampire her best puppy dog eyes.

“Danny, stop that. You're demeaning yourself.”

Instead, Danny took the opportunity to shift and make her gaze even more forlorn. She even started whining softly to underscore it.

“Okay, okay! Jeez. I'll help, just cut that out, right now.”

Danny shifted back and immediately wrapped Carmilla up in a hug. “Thanks, Babe. I owe you one.”

“Yeah, yeah. Better be something good,” Carmilla groused.

“Oh, it will be, but like you said” husked Danny, lowering her voice, “better to keep it between the three of us.”

Now, it was Carmilla's turn to go bright red. “Alright, let's get you back to your family,” said Carmilla, a bit over-enthusiastically, “c'mon Newton, shuffle forward and we'll get you on solid ground.”

“My name’s Maius,” he protested weakly.

Carmilla fixed him with a withering stare. “Don't care, now scooch.”

With a childish pout, he gently shimmied himself forward onto the tailgate. With a great deal of coordination, they were able to get his three good legs on the ground by Carmilla hefting the bulk of his weight while Danny gingerly kept the broken foreleg supported. Now, standing at his full height, he towered over both of them, despite his youth.

“Alright, that’s the hard part done,” said Danny, “the walk will be slow, but it’ll more of a matter of balance than brute force now. You ready, kid?”

“Uh, Red? Aren’t you forgetting something?” asked Carmilla.

Danny cocked her head at Carmilla, sharing a clueless glance with the boy. “My jacket?” she guessed, glancing back at the rumpled heap in the truck, “I don’t think I’ll need it.”

Carmilla put her hand to her face. “I thought you Summers were supposed to be all about ‘Care of Magical Creatures’ and what not.”

“Well, firstly, we’re more guardians than caretakers,” Danny said before smirking, “and secondly, ‘Care of Magical Creatures’ is not a course from Silas, but Hogwarts. Did someone finally give into Laura’s prodding and read Harry Potter?”

Carmilla’s eyes went wide as she once again took to impersonating a tomato. “Uh, no. Uh…” She cleared her throat to regain her composure before pointing at his injured leg, which he was holding clear of the ground. “You need to make a sling for his leg. Even bandaged like that, he’s gonna end up jarring it every few paces. If we end up stopping every single time he has to nurse it, we won't reach the grove til after nightfall.”

“Hey!” he protested, puffing out his chest, “I'm not some weaning foal, I can take the pain.”

“Sorry Seabiscuit,” Carmilla bit back, “I don't care if you're the Herdmare herself, this is gonna hurt like hell now that you're not resting it. Just count yourself lucky you have a better fortitude than your equine cousins; keeping one of them alive this long with a break like this would have been a cruelty beyond measure, assuming the injury didn't kill them outright.”

The boy blanched slightly before turning to Danny “I think a sling sounds like a good idea.”

“Agreed,” said Danny, grabbing her first aid kit and pulling out a large triangle bandage. With help reaching around his barrel from Carmilla, worked to gently, but securely, cradle his hoof.

“So where did you learn to take care of centaurs?” asked Danny as she took one end of the bandage from Carmilla.

“I didn’t,” Carmilla admitted, “but I grew up with horses. Absolutely adored them. My dadd—” Her voice caught in her throat.” —my father even got me one of my own when I was little. A beautiful chestnut gelding.”

“Gelded?!” Maius winced. “Poor fellow.”

Carmilla laughed. “The stablehands took care of him mostly, but I learned all I could. He was mine and I loved to sneak out to the paddocks to see him. I never knew what happened to him after I died. I hope he had a good home.”

Danny secured the tie, testing it with a tug. “In that sort of society? Probably lived a pretty good life, no matter who he ended up with,” Danny said, meeting Carmilla’s sad smile with one of her own, “and I think I’ve got this secure, give it a look.”

Carmilla gave the bandage a few tugs to get it to sit right and get the limb resting how she wanted. Once Carmilla was satisfied with the dressing, she stepped in front of him, taking his hand and resting it on her shoulder. “Alright, Clip-clop. I'm not in the mood to lug you all the way there and I doubt you want to be seen being carried around like a sack of potatoes, so you are going to hold yourself up on my shoulders and both of us should get there with our dignity intact, got it?”

He tested holding himself up. “Yeah, this'll work.”

“Alright, let's get this over with,” said Carmilla, “Danny, walk beside him and make sure he stays balanced. If he goes over and breaks the other one, I'm just gonna put him out of our misery and be done with it.”

Danny chuckled, patting him on the back reassuringly. “Don't worry, she's kidding… mostly… just watch your step.”

“Right, yeah,” he said nervously as they set off.

x-x-x

The trio managed to set a decent pace and entered under the boughs of the grove a little over half an hour later. Across the grove, the centaurs’ encampment was set up just past the trees marking the far boundary. 

“About time you got here,” complained Mel, walking up with Sumira in tow, “the entire herd has been on edge and ill tempered since you ran off.”

“Mel, he’s hurt and we got him here as fast as we could,” said Danny, stepping in between Mel and Maius, “if it weren’t for Carm, you’d still be waiting til I could get some of the girls to rig a wolf litter to drag him here.”

Mel took a look down at Carmilla, who simply glared back at her. “Fine. Let’s get him to a tent. With luck, now that he’s here, things will go a little smoother and we can go home.”

Carmilla snorted derisively but otherwise said nothing as she led the was towards the encampment.

“Don’t mind, Mel,” said Sumira, falling into step beside them, “the centaurs were pleased that you’re alright, but I don’t think your leader is used to leaving control to others. She and Mel have been butting heads since Mel relieved Annie earlier this afternoon. Having you back should relieve some stress.”

Once again, Carmilla chuckled softly, but said nothing, leaving Danny to wonder what was up.

Arriving at the circle of tents, a mare and older stallion sidled up to take the youngster from them. A little skittish of Carmilla at first, they managed to hook him under the arms and relieve Carmilla of her burden.

“Thank you all for the help,” he said, “my injury will make travelling back more difficult, but it is good to be travelling back at all.”

“Glad we could help,” said Danny, “safe journey.”

“Good luck, kid,” Carmilla said with a two-fingered wave, “and next time, don’t run off on your own.”

The centaurs turned and headed into the nearest tent as they began walking back towards the truck.

“Danny, thanks for coming to get him,” said Sumira, “I don’t know how Annie and I could’ve gotten him here ourselves. You too, Carmilla… even though you still scare the hell outta me.”

“So long as someone still is,” Carmilla joked, “at least you’re grateful.”

“Speaking of, I should get back to Mel, she’s still working with the centaur leader.”

“Good luck, Su’” said Danny, “see ya back at the lodge.”

As Sumira headed back into the heart of the grove, Danny and Carmilla continued on their path in silence until Danny noticed the wry smirk that had worked its way back onto her girlfriend’s face.

“Ok, what? What is it? You're not telling me something,” said Danny, nudging Carmilla with her elbow, “spill it.”

“I'm surprised you hadn't realized it already,” said Carmilla, looking overly smug, “his herd is here to talk to the dryads… to try and trade with them…”

Danny's expression went slack as she realized just what the vampire was getting at. “The dryad’s don’t trade…” she said, fighting a grin of amusement.

“Except with you and your little band of amazons.”

“That’s hardly trade,” said Danny, “we’ve been protecting the area for generations. They just give us herbs for our medical supplies if we need them.”

“Which means that whatever they work out, will probably take quite a long time.”

Danny snickered. “Oh Mel is gonna love that. Another group in the forest to watch over.”

“Well hey, on the bright side… at least our friend will be all healed up by the time they make the journey home.”

Danny couldn’t help but laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another one started from a first line prompt. Seriously, writing-prompt-s is a blog worth following if you like writing at all.
> 
> Hope you guys like this one.
> 
> -Juniper


	45. New Horizons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Sky gets out of the hospital, there is more than physical healing that needs to be done.
> 
> Follow-up to "Sky's Change" from 'You Do For Family'

Sky hurt.

As she awoke, that was the first thing she realized. The second was that she was home, in her own bed, rather than the suffocating sterility of the hospital. The third thing she noticed was the pair of arms wrapped around her and the familiar presence not quite pressed up against her back.

Sky tried to adjust herself so that she could snuggle a little closer into Mercy’s warm embrace, but winced as angry muscles protested against the movement, letting out a hiss at the sudden pain.

Behind her, Mercy stirred, loosening her grip. “Hey, you okay?”

“Stupid jerk muscles won’t let me snuggle closer to you,” Sky complained, “little help?”

Mercy chuckled softly. “Sure yeah.” Mercy tightened her grip again, closing the distance that Sky had unsuccessfully tried to cover.

Another surge of pain shot through Sky and she tried, unsuccessfully, to stifle a whimper. Feeling Mercy starting to recoil, she quickly put a hand on her arm, stilling her. “I’m alright, movement just makes my… everything protest. Just stay with me a while.”

Mercy frowned, pressing a kiss to the back of Sky’s head, but otherwise remaining motionless. “I’ll stay for as long as you’ll have me.”

Sky smirked. She loved cheesy lines like that and never missed the opportunity to tease Mercy when she used them. But as she opened her mouth to say something, she realized there was something wrong. Mercy’s tone held a desperation that Sky had never heard before. Letting the joke die in her throat, Sky laid her arms over Mercy’s just stroked her skin with her thumb as they both drifted back to sleep.

Some undeterminable amount of time later, they were roused by a soft knock at the door as Hazel poked her head into the room.

“Hey… Mom made breakfast if you guys wanna come down,” said Hazel hesitantly.

“Breakfast sounds great,” said Mercy as she sat up and stretched, “whaddya say, Babe? You feelin’ up to it?”

“I think so,” Sky said, experimentally shifting her legs towards the edge of the bed. She squeezed her eyes shut; her body felt like she’d run back-to-back marathons as every muscle screamed in protest.

Finally getting her legs over the edge of the bed, she managed to lever herself up into a sitting position. She paused, taking a moment to gather herself before attempting to stand. Looking up, she tried to give Hazel a reassuring smile only to find her sister averting her gaze, uncomfortably studying the doorframe. Sky's heart felt like it had caved in, there'd never been any sort distance between her and Hazel before, but now, the six feet to the door may as well have been six miles. Sky's shoulders slumped and she bowed her head, fighting tears.

“Uh, Hazel… we’ll be right down, kay?” said Mercy as she walked around the bed, sitting back down next to Sky.

“Y-yeah… sure,” said Hazel, a guilty expression on her face, “I'll just… sure.” Hazel turned and left, leaving the door ajar.

Sky sniffled, prompting Mercy to reach an arm around her and pull her into a hug.

“I hurt her…” said Sky miserably, cuddling into Mercy “I hurt you… I hurt everyone. Just because I was so goddamn selfish.”

Mercy held Sky close, rocking her gently. “Yes. Yes, you did and yes, you were. But…” she added, pulling away so she could look Sky in the eyes, “it'll be okay. You made a mistake, a huge one, but your family loves you _ —I  _ love you— and no mistake, no matter how large, can destroy that.” She gently kissed Sky on the forehead before pulling her close again, trying to convey every bit of forgiveness that she could as Sky cried silently into her chest.

They sat in silence for several minutes before Sky pulled away, wiping at her eyes with a hand. “I suppose we should get down there,” she said, still sniffling a little. Mercy fished a tissue off the nightstand, which Sky accepted with a smile as she dabbed at her face.

“Only if you're ready.”

“Well, I'm not,” she admitted, “but I'm not about to hide up here for the rest of my life either.”

Sky put both hands on the edge of the bed, and with a hiss and a grunt, she pushed herself into a standing position. Mercy quickly came up behind her, arms ready to support her girlfriend, but Sky waved her off with a smile and stiffly began walking out the door.

It took a couple of minutes before Sky finally reached the kitchen, limping downstairs one step at a time. On the table was an enormous spread of food. Plates of bacon and sausage, fresh baked bread and muffins, a heaping bowl of scrambled eggs and a platter of fresh cut fruit. The smell in the room was absolutely incredible and both Sky and Mercy found their mouths watering immediately.

Across the room, Hazel and Laf were talking quietly, the plates in the table were still untouched. It appeared they, or more likely Perry, had been waiting for the girls to come down.

“Good morning you two!” chirped Perry brightly, “come sit down, there's plenty to go around.”

“G’morning Aunt Perry,” said Mercy, taking a seat, “this looks fantastic.”

“Mom…” asked Sky hesitantly, “how long did this take you?”

“Not long at all,” said Perry brightly, “I just whipped everything right up.”

“...Mom.”

“Well, I may have started bread and muffins at around six, to give the dough enough time to proof,” Perry said, her smile growing nervous, “but it's fine, I was up anyways.” She glanced over, meeting LaFontaine’s gaze as they worried their bottom lip.

Sky limped around the table and pulled her mother into a tight hug. “I'm sorry.”

Perry held her daughter close, rejoicing in having Sky safe and healthy in her arms. “I know, sweetie. It'll be okay.”

When they finally broke the hug, Sky turned to her other parent. “Laf?”

LaFontaine looked back at her with an unreadable expression. Sky braced herself as they opened their mouth, but before they said anything, their gaze softened, mouth closing into a pensive expression. They strode forward, giving her a quick hug before stepping back, still holding her by her shoulders.

“I’m not happy with you and make no mistake, we still need to talk about all this,” they said, Sky nodding ruefully, “but it can wait until later. I  _ am _ glad you’re home and I think right now, you need a breakfast that’s not hospital food.”

Sky smiled softly. “Thanks Laf, I’m really hungry.”

“Well then let’s sit down before this gets cold,” Laf said, gesturing towards the chair.

Sky couldn’t help but feel a touch of relief. There was still an edge of tension in the room, but it felt like things would be okay, eventually.

x-x-x

After breakfast, once everything was cleaned up, which Sky insisted on helping with despite her stiffness and Mercy’s protests, everyone moved by unspoken agreement to the living room for the talk that needed to happen, as much as no one really wanted it to.

For several minutes, awkward silence reigned as no one was sure where to start. Hazel, who’d been looking back and forth between her parents and her sister, waiting for one of them to start, finally got fed up and dropped what had been on her mind.

“Why?” she asked, locking eyes with Sky, “I mean, I know  _ why _ ”—she glanced at Mercy—”but you knew the serum was untested, that it was off-limits, that it was  _ dangerous _ …”

Sky kept her eyes on her hands. “I… I know that…”

“Do you?” asked Laf, distress now plain on their face, “do you realize how close you came to dying?”

“Of course I—” Sky’s words froze in her throat as her head snapped up and she met the cold fear in LaFontaine’s eyes. 

She knew she’d nearly died several times from both the change and the resulting fever; Dr. Antos had told her as much himself. However, up until this moment, it had felt like something she’d read in a book, that had happened to someone else. 

Now, it was hitting her; she had nearly  _ killed _ herself. She had nearly killed herself with the serum that Laf and Hazel had made. It would have been her fault, but they would have blamed themselves for making the serum. Her family, the entire family, would blame themselves for not seeing her desires and talking to her. And Mercy…

_ Oh god… Mercy. _

...she would think that she was the reason for the entire thing… and the most gut wrenching part for Sky is that she wouldn’t have been wrong.

“Yeah, exactly,” said Laf, their voice thick with emotion as they noticed Sky’s face blanche and tears start to run down her face. They wiped their eyes with a sleeve as they, likewise, started to tear up. Leaning into Perry’s warm embrace, she wrapped an arm around them and they cried together, the emotion in the room overwhelming everyone.

“I’m sorry,” bawled Sky, held tight by Mercy, “it’s not enough, but I’m so, so sorry. I told myself it was for Mercy, so she could stop having to choose between leaving me behind or not joining the pack, but that was a lie. I wanted it for me, so I could be a wolf, be part of the pack. But how can I expect to be part of the pack when I’m willing to put everyone through something like this.”

Hazel, completely overcome as well, got up and moved to cuddle up with Sky and Mercy. “Hey, hey now. You  _ are _ part of the pack, we all are, even if some of us lack the more lupine characteristics. Or did, til a short time ago.” Hazel chuckled in spite of the tears, prompting Sky to do the same. “Like Mercy said earlier, we all love you and no mistake, even if makes things awkward for a while, is going to stop that.”

“You brat,” teased Mercy, “you were eavesdropping.”

“Of course I was,” said Hazel, “I needed to make sure I hadn’t broken my little sister.”

There was a palpable sense of relief in the room as the mood noticeably lightened. Everyone took a minute as Perry fetched a box of tissues for everyone to dry eyes and blow noses.

“So, what now?” said Sky, “I guess I’m grounded, huh.”

Laf and Perry shared a look. “No. No, you’re not.” said Laf, much to Sky’s surprise “you’re an adult now, capable of making your own decisions, both good and bad”—they gave her a meaningful look—“and hopefully, learning from them.”

Sky was speechless. She looked to Mercy who gave her and equally flabbergasted look back. “Really?” asked Sky, “not even a ‘my house, my rules’?”

“We would never,” said Perry, “you know very well that we grew up in those sorts of houses. The unspoken next line is ‘if you don’t like it, get out’. We will never tell you —any of you— that.”

“Damn right,” said Laf, before looking sternly at Sky again, “that being said, this has cost you some trust. With me, with your sister, probably a little bit with everyone and nothing is going to repair that except time.”

Sky frowned solemly and nodded slowly.

“Now,” stated Laf, “while we aren’t punishing you for this, your decision has left you some responsibilities to fulfill. Do you remember what Zeke told you about making wolves?”

Sky swallowed nervously. “That making wolves was illegal. Though, he also said that since I’m my own ‘victim’, there’s a loophole that protects me since the rules never anticipated that.”

“Close, he’s not required to report it since it’s not the viral strain that you caught through an attack. However, Zeke needs info on your transformation to make sure he can protect the pack,” said Laf, a anticipatory gleam entering their eyes, “so we need to do testing to figure out how complete the change is.”

Sky visibly relaxed. “Well, what are we waiting for?” she said, jumping to her feet before cringing up in pain and collapsing back onto the couch, caught by Hazel and Mercy.

“That.” said Laf, pointing at Sky, “you need to heal up first, then we’ll get to the tests.”

“Sounds like a better idea,” groaned Sky, “actually would anyone mind if I went and took a nap.”

There was a chuckle around the room.

“C’mon squirt,” said Hazel, pulling Sky’s arm over her shoulder, “let’s get you upstairs.”

The two stood up and started towards the stairs. Sky paused their motion and looked back. “Laf? Mom? Thanks. I love you.”

“Love you too, Munchkin,” replied Laf with a sad smile.

x-x-x

A couple of weeks later, Laf and Sky found themselves out in the backyard accompanied by Hazel and Mercy. Sky was feeling much like her old self again. She’d spent the last few days stretching and moving to work her muscles out, finally resuming her daily dance routines in the family room. Laf, wanting to err on the side of caution, was skeptical, but an impromptu freestyle routine convinced them that she was ready.

“Alright,” said Laf, “we all ready to get started?”

“Sure,” said Sky, “but why are we out here and not down in the lab?”

“Well, aside from being more pleasant out here so that you’re not feeling like a lab animal,” said Laf, “we need room for you to move around.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Now, let’s get started,” said Laf, “Sky, if you can go ahead and shift.”

Sky bit her lip. “Um… I don’t know how.”

Laf’s eyes went wide with surprise and immediately began jotting things down.

“Really, Sky?” asked Mercy, walking up and rubbing Sky’s arm.

“Yeah,” said Sky with a frown, “I assumed once I healed up I’d feel something different, like a new muscle to flex or something. How do you shift?”

Mercy paused in thought. “I… don’t actually know. I just do,” Mercy replied, “Laf? what does that mean? Is she not actually a wolf? Did we go through all of this for nothing?”

“Calm down,” they said, “this is actually a good sign.”

“It is?” asked Sky hopefully.

“Yes. From what I’ve found out, genetic wolves actually have to learn how to transform. They all do it as infants, so it’s as good as instinctual, but it’s a learned skill like walking and talking. If the serum was acting like the viral strain, you’d just feel how to change and probably would have done so accidentally by now. This is good news, indeed.”

“Alright, but we’re still stuck on ‘how to change’.”

“I have an idea,” said Hazel, “Mercy, start shifting back and forth. If baby wolves change by watching their parents, there might be something to it Sky can sense now.”

“Sounds good,” said Mercy as she began walking a slow circle around Sky, changing from human to wolf and back again every few seconds.

Sky followed Mercy slowly with her head, studying each change.

“Anything?” asked Hazel after Mercy had made several laps.

“I… think so?” said Sky, “it’s hard to describe, almost intangible. It’s like there is something both outside and inside and if I just push against it—”

At that moment, Sky disappeared and in her place a small wolf with a two tone black and blonde coat stood, though only for a moment before the wolf’s legs collapsed from beneath it.

“Sky!” exclaimed Mercy, rushing to the wolf’s side, “what’s wrong with her?”

Laf smiled reassuringly. “Nothing’s wrong. She’s just never used wolf legs before. It’ll take her time to learn how to walk. It’ll take her time to learn how to do most things. She has more muscle strength than a puppy, I don’t know if that’ll help or hinder her, but the coordination will take time.”

Hazel looked askance at Laf. “Wasn’t the whole point of working out here so she could move around and junk?”

“I was being optimistic, though like the shifting, the less that’s instinctual, the better.”

Sky slowly lifted her head. It was a little wobbly but she managed to turn her gaze towards Laf enough to give them an annoyed glare.

“See? You’re getting the hang of it already,” said Laf cheerily.

“You’re loving this, aren’t you?” asked Mercy.

“A little bit,” said Laf, “I don’t mean to be mean. I’m mostly excited, this is really new stuff even amongst werewolves. Now Sky, I’m going to come take a look at you. Get some fur and swab for some DNA. We’ll have to get Dr. Antos to give your wolf a proper physical in the near future, to make sure the change is complete and healthy, but the samples will do for now.”

Sky gave Laf a slow nod as she continued to figure out the new and alien muscles. Moving quickly, Laf moved up and trimmed fur from her head, back, tail and forepaws. They then produced a swab and with some difficulty, Sky managed to open her mouth and hold her head at an angle for Laf to get at the inside of her cheek.

“Alright, that should do it for now,” said Laf, “now why don’t you try to shift back?”

Sky looked pensive for a moment before she changed back to her human form, face down on the lawn.

“Okay, that was not remotely like what I was expecting,” Sky said, rolling over and sitting up.

“What were you expecting?” asked Mercy curiously.

“Well, kinda like what it feels like to crawl on your hands and knees.”

“Oh yeah, no,” said Mercy, with a pained expression, “not even remotely. I wish you’d asked me, I coulda warned you.”

“Well, hindsight and all that,” shrugged Sky, before looking over to Laf, “what’s next?”

“For tests? Nothing for now,” said Laf, gathering their notes, “what I need will require more freedom of movement and the more medical stuff I want to leave to Zeke. We’ll make you an appointment.”

“Somehow I think I’ll like Dr. Antos’ tests somewhat less.”

“Probably, but I’d rather be safe than sorry,” said Laf, “now, we might be done actual tests, but why don’t you practice shifting and getting used to your new body. It’s probably going to be a fairly lengthy road to getting you to full strength, so best to start sooner than later.”

“Sounds good,” said Sky, standing up for another attempt.

“Wait!” cried Mercy, jumping up and latching her arms around Sky’s waist, “ok, now you won’t fall.”

Laf chuckled before heading back into the house, leaving the girls to their practice.

x-x-x

The pack gathered around the TV, looking at the webcam Laura had set up. On the screen, a sleepy looking Charlie smiled back through the screen.

“Well, I’ve got to go get my day started,” she said, “these ruins won’t dig themselves out.”

“Alright sweetie,” said Laura, “have fun and if a piece of those ruins just happens to end up in your luggage, we won’t judge.”

“Mom, I already told you, I’m not pillaging any ruins for you,” huffed Charlie, “I’m bringing you olive oil and you’re going to like it.”

Laura pouted. “Fine”

Everyone laughed.

“Just two more weeks,” said Mercy, “can’t wait to have you home.”

“Me too,” said Charlie, glancing off-screen, “alright, I really have to go now. I love you all.”

A mixed chorus of ‘love you too’s and ‘bye’s filled the room before the screen went black.

“Oh, it’s always so nice to talk to her,” said Sue, “she’s been gone too long.”

“Far too long,” agreed Danny, “not to mention talking to her while sitting in one place gives me cramps. I need to stretch my legs, who’s with me.”

The room filled with activity as nearly everyone got up and made for the backdoor. On the couch, Sky remained curled up, having shooed Mercy off to enjoy the run. She settled in to wait when Paul walked up to where she was sitting, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Aren’t you gonna join us, kiddo?” he asked with a smile.

“I… uh… what?” she stuttered, “I can join you guys?”

“I don’t see why not,” he said, “you figured out a lope the other day. You’ll be able to keep up.”

“But… I’m welcome?” she said, forlornly.

“Of course, you’re welcome,” said Danny, as she walked over, “heck, you always were welcome, you just woulda been bored to tears as a human; just ask Charlie.”

Sky tried to find words as she teared up a little.

Danny chuckled as she took Sky’s hand and helped her up. “C’mon, your family’s waiting for you.”

Sky could only nod as she followed Paul and Danny into the backyard where the pack was waiting. The group of wolves that was happily mulling about quieted slightly as Sky walked onto the deck. A mood of anticipation fell over the group, some even bouncing excitedly on their front paws. 

As they reached the lawn, Paul and Danny each shifted and turned to Sky, inviting her in. With a smile and tears in her eyes, she descended the stairs and shifted into a wolf. Around her, the pack felt like a fire as their excitement got the best of them and one by one, raised their muzzles in a howl. Mercy hadn’t learned how yet, but it didn’t matter. They were howling for her, welcoming her. 

Mercy walked up to her, nuzzling close as Danny led the way towards the woods. Giving Sky one more look of pride, Danny gave a bark and led the pack, and Sky, into the trees. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one I've been wanting to write for a very long time but was worried about doing it justice (I think I succeeded?), so it's been on the back-burner in my idea pile for a while. I also found out after writing it that Jessi had actually had a recovery chapter of her own started. Luckily, it looks like it fits into the time skips here, so we'll probably finish and post that at some point in the future.
> 
> Just a note about continuity, in case anyone has forgotten: this is the period while Charlie is in Greece, hence why she's missing during the recovery and talking to them over video chat.
> 
> I hope everyone liked this and let us know what ya think.  
> -Juniper


	46. Making a Scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura should know better than to leave her camera unattended.

“And finally, on a lighter note for this week, the Alchemy Club seems to have started off a perpetual display of fireworks just behind the Milgram building. Ideal viewing of the display seems to be from the south lawn from about nine to eleven in the evening. For those students who live within close earshot of the unending explosions, which at this point just seem to be the residents of the Zeta Omega Mu house, might I recommend a temporary change of accommodations, or at the very least, some earplugs. Well, that wraps it up for this week gentle viewers. Until next time, stay safe Silas.” 

Laura reached out and cut off the recording, saving it to her hard drive to edit after class.

“Hey, Carm?”

“Hmm?” Carmilla looked up from her book, “yeah, Cupcake?”

“I’m off to class.” Laura plucked her bookbag off the stool and leaned over to give Carmilla a quick peck on the lips, “I’ll be back before dinner.”

“Alright, sweetheart,” said Carmilla, “don’t fall asleep in class now.”

“Pfff, I would never fall asleep in Literary History… again,” said Laura, “I’m not sure what was more embarrassing. Noticeably removing my note page from my face in the middle of the lecture theatre, or having to beg the notes from someone after aforementioned page-ectomy. Professor Matheson still teases me about ‘getting really into the material’.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Even better than coffee.”

“I still think I prefer a caffeine buzz over overarching social dread,” grumbled Laura, checking her watch, “now, I’ve got to head. I’ll see you later.”

“Bye.”

Carmilla craned her neck to watch Laura leave and listened carefully as her footsteps receded up the hall and down the stairs. Once she was satisfied her Cupcake was on her way, Carmilla grabbed her phone and dialed.

“Hey Babe. Come on over, coast is clear.”

x-x-x

Laura got back to the dorm several hours later, dropping her bookbag and flopping down onto her bed. She indulged in several blissful seconds complete lethargy before noticing her roommate was missing. With a frown, she got back up to find a note on Carmilla’s pillow in her typically beautiful script.

_ Laura _

_ Danny and I went to get us some dinner. We’ll be back soon. _

_ Love, Carm. _

Laura whined in the back of her throat, annoyed at the immediate lack of girlfriends to cuddle. She flopped forward onto Carmilla’s bed, hoping for at least a mild boost but the bed was long cold and the smell of Carmilla, while comforting, was a pale shadow of what Laura really wanted.

Rolling over onto her back, Laura debated going out to find them, but quickly decided against it. Incorrectly guessing their location would simply delay cuddles even more, which was completely unacceptable. In the meantime, she would have to find herself a distraction.

She turned her attention to her computer. There was, of course, her video from earlier to edit and post. That would be a perfect distraction while she waited.

Waking her computer up, she opened her editor only to find that her video was not the most recent file in the queue. There was a recording from just a short while after she’d left for class that day. Curious, she grabbed her mouse and double-clicked the file.

On the screen, the video opened with Carmilla was standing in the foreground of the usual field of view reading some old tome. Instead of her usual casual attire, Carmilla was done up in a suit and bowler hat, which Laura decided suited her very nicely. In the background, Danny burst in through the door, wearing a very well cut tweed suit of her own.

_ “Aha! I knew I would find you here!” exclaimed Danny, pointing an accusatory finger in Carmilla's direction. _

_ Carmilla closed the book with an emphatic ‘snap’ as she whirled around. “Indeed you did, Sir Pennystock! For it is here where I intended for you to find me.” _

_ “Villain!” exclaimed Danny, “so it is a trap that you have wrought here, Lord Cliffhaven.” _

_ “Trap? You wound me my fine fellow. I have… invited you here to share a scheme which I have uncovered not this very night. A scheme to pit us against one another and lead to the fall of both our families.” _

_ Danny looked at Carmilla warily. “A bold claim, to be sure. Say I were to believe you, upon whose shoulders do you lay this accusation of double-dealing? I daresay I know of none in the realm who would dare the wrath of one of nine families, to say nothing of two.” _

_ “None, of course, except perhaps… the highest.” _

_ “No sir! Surely you cannot mean—” _

_ “I do, sir!” exclaimed Carmilla, lifting up a cane from off-screen and gesticulating emphatically, “the perpetrator of this heinous scheme is none other than the King himself!” _

_ “No, not Reginald the Deceiver! I won’t hear of it.” Danny dramatically turned away before looking back and pointing at Carmilla once again. “This is treasonous talk, Cliffhaven. You’d best give me some sort of proof or I’m going straight to the magistrate and it’ll be the gallows for you!” _

_ “Please Pennystock. Do you think me daft?” Carmilla asked, now chewing on the stem of a pipe she’d produced from somewhere, “Do you recall the night of the midsummer’s ball?”  _

_ “Recall? How could I forget?!” growled Danny, clenching her fists, “it was to be my daughter’s finest hour. Her swearing in as captain of the royal guard, but the ceremony was ruined by that buffoon you call a son, blundering in so deep into his cups, I’m surprised he hadn’t drowned.” _

_ “Indeed you are correct, but for one detail. My meandering progeny’s ailment was not of drink, but drug. When his brother finally managed to collect him, he found this upon his belt.” Carmilla tossed a small bottle across to Danny, whose scowl deepened upon inspection. _

_ “This flask bears the mark of my house. You mean to lay blame for that… travesty, at my feet?” _

_ “I’m certain that is what I was meant to do, and I would be a liar if I claimed that had not been my original intent,” Carmilla said, meandering as she talked, “but I am nothing if not a thorough man and I wished for something a little more iron-clad. Imagine my surprise when upon further investigation, I found the drug my poor son had imbibed was none other than amberroot!” _

_ Danny’s head snapped up in surprise. “Amberroot? That’s impossible. It’s so rare that it’s reserved for use as medicine… for the royal family.” _

_ “Exactly, so either you or your family somehow found one of the rarest herbs in existence and risked exile or worse, on an act of mere pettiness, or…” She trailed off, looking at Danny knowingly _

_ Danny looked grim. “Why? We don’t like each other, but our families have been loyal to the crown for as long as has been recorded. We were both instrumental in the reign of the King’s mother, Queen Harriet the Whimsical, rest her soul.” _

_ “Perhaps that is why,” said Carmilla, “our young sovereign seems to be charting a different course than his kin. Perhaps he means to sweep away her legacy and we are but the first obstacles.” _

_ “Perhaps. It is a sign of dark times indeed, if you are correct,” said Danny darkly, “but that is still to be seen. I would see the proof of amberroot and, if I am satisfied, we will have to act swiftly. Not only are our families at stake, but perhaps the entire realm.” _

_ “Indeed,” agreed Carmilla, “quickly, to my study.” She strode off to the left followed closely by Danny. _

Laura stared at the window, a wide grin plastered on her face. She couldn’t help but giggle at a tweed clad arm sneaking along the bottom of the screen to to hit the keyboard and end the recording. When the screen went black, she finally let out laughter she’d been holding in during the little scene.

“She’s laughing at us,” came Carmilla’s voice from behind her. Laura spun around to see her pouting as well as Danny standing next to her sporting a grin, “we spent countless hours—”

“Minutes,” corrected Danny.

“—and utmost effort—”

“I think the hardest part was the five minutes we spent raiding the Lustig costume room.”

“—to put together a work of the finest art for you.”

Laura cleared her throat, trying in vain to stifle the grin that was twitching at the corners of her mouth. “Oh yes, of course. Truly a dramatic work for the ages. Worthy of the globe theatre.” She managed to hold a semi-straight face for only a few more seconds before she broke down laughing again, dragging her girlfriends into giggles right along with her. “Alright, joking aside, that was a wonderful little bit. Did one of you write that?”

“Sadly, no,” said Danny, still chuckling, “I found that scene in amongst my lit marking. I don’t know who’s it is, no one’s claimed it in my classes. Seemed kinda fun, so we had at it.”

“Oh dear,” said Laura, “I hope it wasn’t something important, like a creative writing assignment.”

“I’m sure it’s fine,” said Carmilla, flopping down on her bed, “seemed like something a monkey could type out in a few hours, they’ll make it up.”

“Well, I thought it was fine,” argued Laura, “both the writing and the performance. It was so good in fact, I’ll forgive you two for not being here when I got back from class.” She got up from her computer chair and joined Carmilla on the bed, immediately wrapping herself around the vampire.

Danny rolled her eyes with a smile. “You’re so gracious, and before you ask, we did actually get some dinner.” She hefted a large paper bag she was carrying onto the desk. “Figure we can eat together before you get back to editing your video.”

Laura frowned. She’d forgotten all about editing her own video thanks to Danny and Carmilla’s and right now she really just wanted to spend time with them. Getting up, she walked over to her computer where the video editor was still open. Laura intended on closing the program, but at that moment a sly grin crossed her face as an idea occurred to her.

“Laura…” said Carmilla suspiciously, “what are you doing?”

“Well, I really should edit and get this video up tonight, but I’m really not in the mood to,” said Laura, “especially since you guys went and got… are those nachos?”

“You know it,” said Danny, pulling out condiments.

“So I figure I should give my viewers something while they wait for the update.” Laura nonchalantly dragged the mouse across the desk. “And it looks like there’s something available right here.”

Both Danny and Carmilla realized what Laura was doing a moment too late.

“Laura…”

“No.”

Laura just grinned as she clicked the mouse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, not so much a chapter as word soup. This was supposed to be about Laura’s family hijacking her camera to act out famous scenes until I realized that I’d just be copy/pasting entire dialogues, which really wouldn’t be all that interesting, so I instead apparently wrote the basis for some victorian era-esque fantasy story. I’ll be honest, I kinda want to write a full story about Pennystock, Cliffhaven and their rebellion against King Reginald.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> -Juniper


	47. Be Who You Want To Be - High Noon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids enjoy another turn in the playground of their own imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sky,11; Mercy, 12; Hendrix, 14; Charlie and Hazel, 15.
> 
> Heads up. Some mild violence and blood. Probably not worth mentioning, but eh, better safe than sorry.

It was your typical afternoon at the town saloon. The usual faces taking up seats, trying to find respite from the oppressive heat at the bottom of a glass. To one side, a poker game separated the otherwise honest ranch hands from their hard won earnings. Off in the corner, the piano player tickled the ivories with his usual unassuming skill and at the bar, the saloon keep idly polished a glass, waiting for the next thirsty soul wander through the doors. Said expectations were only half fulfilled when the doors swung open and a figure bearing an all-too-familiar silver star stepped into the establishment, plunging the room into silence.

Hands still resting on the saloon doors, she swept her gaze across the room, appraising each patron in turn as each of them stared back, praying they weren’t the target of her intent. The sheriff was a legend in these parts and kept the peace with a sure hand, but as far as the residents of the town were concerned, the name of Sheriff Mercy was one of the greatest ironies on god’s green earth.

The sheriff seemed to come to some sort of conclusion and gave a satisfied nod, striding casually towards the bar. The relief in the room was palpable as the off-key piano melody resumed and the bar’s denizens returned to their libations.

“Gimme a glass of the good stuff,” she said, leaning against the bar, “and none o’ that bottom shelf swill, a lawbringer ain’t no good if she’s blind.”

“Excuse me, young lady?”

x-x-x

Laura looked across the counter at her daughter with a combination of amusement and annoyance. “Did you maybe want to rephrase that request?” she said, steepling her fingers over the magazine she’d been reading.

“C’mon Mom,” whined Mercy, “I’m trying to talk ‘old west’, that’s what they sounded like.”

Laura remained silent, looking at Mercy expectantly.

“Fine,” conceded Mercy, “please?”

Laura smiled with satisfaction before going to the fridge and pouring a small glass of apple juice. Making sure she had Sky’s attention, she slid it down the counter into Sky’s waiting hand.

x-x-x

“Much obliged to you, barkeep,” said Mercy, taking a hearty sip of the whiskey, “kindly put it on my tab, if you would.”

“Course. Always glad to keep a patron happy.” The bartender swept up the glass and returned to her cleaning.

With a nod, the sheriff made her way across the room to the poker game where she found a familiar face, hat sitting low over his eyes.

“Good day, gentlemen,” she greeted, the men around the table sizing her up.

“Afternoon Sheriff,” said the man, “to what do we owe the pleasure of your company?”

“Well, Mr. Hendrix, I couldn’t help but notice your little card game and decided to come have a look see. Make sure everything is on the level, as it were.”

_ “Actually, the table’s wobbly. Hence why we’re playing cards and not marbles.” _

_ “Charlie?” _

_ “Yes, Drix?” _

_ “Hush” _

“Now Sheriff,” cautioned Hendrix, putting his cards down on the table “gamblin’ ain’t no crime round these parts and this is just friendly game.” He gestured around the table.

“Well, you’re certainly right,” said Mercy, putting her drink down, “gambling’s not a crime… but cheating sure is.”

Hendrix’s stare hardened, but he kept his smile. “A bold accusation, Sheriff, and an incorrect one. If I were cheating, I’d be doing a might better,” he said, gesturing to his dwindling chip stacks.

Mercy remained unperturbed. “That you would. Actually, bit of an odd turn for Kid Hendrix, the most infamous card sharp this side of the Rio Grande. Almost like someone has another card up their sleeve.”

The player Mercy was standing next to went for his gun, but Mercy was faster and had her barrel to his temple before he’d even reached his holster. “Ah, ah, ah. Hands on the table. Now.” He did as he was told and with her free hand, she tugged at his sleeve, revealing a pair of aces in a clip above his wrist.

The other players at the table jumped to their feet in anger, drawing the attention of the rest of the room.

“Well as I live and breath, I thought my luck had taken an unusually drastic turn,” snarled Hendrix, “Charles Pickett, you snake in the grass” His hand slowly crept towards his own six-shooter.

“Hey, stow it Kid,” snapped Mercy, stilling his motion. He met her gaze, rage boiling in his eyes. “Don’t you worry. Charlie boy here is gonna have a nice long stay in the iron bar hotel.”

“Y’all can’t hold me,” protested Charlie as Mercy levered him outta his seat, “my mama will leave you for the buzzards to pick at.”

“Your mama can try as she likes, but I do not look kindly on threats,” warned Mercy, “now let’s go.”

“Hey, what about the pot?” asked Hendrix.

“Well, seems best for the rest of you to split it ‘mongst yourselves,” said the sheriff, “seems a fitting… repayment.”

“Don’t you dare!” yelled Charlie, “that money is mine. Mama is gonna come after all o’ yous!”

Hendrix looked from his fellow players back to the sheriff and her quarry. “I think we’ll opt for the former,” he said, as they started sorting Charlie’s former pile, “thankee Sheriff, for your devoted service.”

“Just doin’ my job,” she replied before hauling Charlie out the door.

x-x-x

“What’s a man gotta do for a decent meal round here?!” yelled Charlie from his cell.

Mercy pushed up her hat with a single finger from where it was covering her face, as she lounged back on her chair. “Your breakfast is right there where I left it.”

“Breakfast?” scoffed Charlie, “beans, bread and water ain’t breakfast, it’s pig fodder. I demand real food.”

“That’s as real as it’s gonna get,” she snapped, “now—”

She was interrupted by a pounding on the door to her office. With an inquisitive look, she got up and opened the door.

x-x-x

“Hi Mercy!” said Hazel, standing on the step with Sky just behind her, “what’s with the cowboy hat?”

“We’re playing Western,” said Mercy, “what brings you by?”

“Drix called and told us to come over, something about needing more people.”

“Hazel!” greeted Charlie, coming up behind her sister, “c’mon, you can spring me from jail.”

“Jailbreak? I’m in!”

“Me too,” echoed Sky.”

“I suddenly feel outnumbered,” said Mercy.

“Don’t worry,” assured Charlie, patting Mercy on the shoulder, “you’re the good guy. It’ll be fine.”

“Well, in that case…”

x-x-x

“Sheriff Mercy, I presume?”

“Yes,” Mercy replied, letting the woman into the front office, “and you would be?”

“My name is Hazel Pickett and I believe that you are holding my boy.” She levelled a cold gaze at Mercy.

Mercy remained stalwart, though she could understand the reverence the man in her cells held this woman with. “If your boy is one Charles Pickett, then you would be correct.”

“I want to see him,” she demanded, before softening slightly, “that is, if you would so allow.”

Mercy studied the woman for a moment before inclining her head towards the cell block, allowing her entry.

At the woman’s entry into the cells, Charlie perked up. “Mama! I knew you’d come for me.”

“Of course I did, my boy. How are they treating you?”

“Bad. Real bad, Mama. Won’t give me no real food or nuthin’,” he said, gesturing to the as yet untouched plate of food.

“Oh my poor boy,” said Hazel, “don’t worry. Mama’ll take care of it.” She turned to Mercy, who’d been observing the exchange from the doorway. “I demand you release my boy immediately,” she said implacably

“I’m sorry, Ma’am, but your son here was was caught cheating, red-handed. Only person I’ll be releasing him to is the marshall.”

Hazel looked livid, but held her composure as she turned back to Charlie. “You’re gonna have to wait here a bit longer, but don’t worry. I’ll get you out.”

“I know you will, Mama.”

Turning for the exit, she only gave one last glare to Mercy before sweeping out the door of the sheriff’s office.

“Now you’re in for it,” cackled Charlie from where he sat.

x-x-x

The sun was getting high in the sky as Mercy rode her horse around the edge of town, making her patrol rounds. She was getting ready to turn back into town when the distinct sound of gunfire came from the direction of Main Street. Kicking her horse into action, she flew towards town.

Arriving onto the thoroughfare, she dismounted and hitched her horse, scanning the storefronts, trying to determine where the shots had come from. It was then she spotted Hendrix waving at her from the front of the hotel. His other hand was clapped to his shoulder, obviously covering a wound.

“Boy, Sheriff, you are a sight for sore eyes,” said Hendrix, leading her into the building.

“What happened?”

“Well, unless I am sorely mistaken, Charlie made good on his threat.” Hendrix nodded into one of the rooms. 

Mercy looked in to see one of his card playing companions, stone dead, shot clean through the heart. It looked like the man had died asleep, never having woken up. “Where were you when this happened?”

“I was in my room,” said Hendrix, pointing across the hall, “I’m lucky the gunner was so sloppy. I was awake and ready before she could repeat her performance. Fortunately, she didn’t seem to be quite as sure a shot when her target ain’t asleep,” he said, indicating his shoulder, “unfortunately, I, myself, am not quite as adept with a gun as I am a deck of cards, and only managed to wing her.”

Mercy looked around the room, noting the respective blood stains of Hendrix and his assailant. “What’d she look like? Older woman in her forties or fifties?”

“If’n you mean Mama dearest, I’m afraid I’ll have to disappoint,” said Hendrix, “nah, this one was real young, probably about the same age as that fella you’ve got locked up.”

At that moment, the sound of an explosion came from outside, from somewhere in front of the hotel.

“Well, unless I miss my guess, I’ll have to correct myself. Fella you  _ had _ locked up.”

“Tarnation!” exclaimed Mercy, running full bore out the front door and into the street. Sure enough, a plume of smoke was rising up the street, about where her office stood. Deciding it was quicker to run rather than unhitch her horse, she pounded her way up the dusty road and burst in her own front door. 

The inside was filled with smoke and dust, making it hard to see. Making her way to the back, she noticed it was far brighter than it should have been. As she got close enough to see, she was able to discern that the back wall of her cells was blown wide open and her erstwhile convict was nowhere to be found.

_ Ok wait, an explosion that close woulda killed him. The shockwave would have turned him into soup even if somehow he avoided debris. _

_ Hazel, you are very right. However, I’m invoking the rule of ‘it’s fun, so deal with it.’ _

_...good rule, honestly. Objection withdrawn. _

Boiling over with frustration, Mercy stomped back out into the fresh air to catch her breath and think. That was where Kid Hendrix found her.

“I take it from your countenance that I was correct and your guest has... excused himself from the premises.”

“Yep,” she said, popping the ‘p’, “and now they’re all loose and I have no way to find them.”

“Well, I have an idea,” he said, “there was one more player in our little game and I’ll bet Mama Pickett isn’t one to do anything by halves.”

Mercy nodded. “Good thinking. He’s a ranch owner just on the outskirts of town. Easy pickin’s way out there.”

“Then we best saddle up and mosey on over there.”

“Excuse me, we?”

“Well, of course,” said Hendrix, “last I checked there were at least three of them, but there’s only one of you. You need allies and I just happen to be ready, willing and able.”

“You’re hurt and you’ve said yourself you're a lousy shot.”

“I’m not the sort of man to let a scratch hold me back and better a gun that can’t shoot straight at your side than no gun at all.”

“Alright, if you’re game, let’s go.”

x-x-x

“I already gave you the money, why won’t you leave me alone?”

Charlie just grinned as he socked the man in the gut again.

“This isn’t just about money,” said Mama Hazel from where she stood, “there’s the insult to be dealt with too and really, this day has just downright vile. Isn’t that right, Skyler?” She looked towards the woman holding a bloody mark on her side.

Skyler nodded with a sneer before backhanding the man with her free hand.

_ Hazel? Charlie? Sky? Can you reel it in a bit? You guys are being disturbingly good at shaking down a teddy bear. _

_ Sorry, Mom. _

“Well, as fun as it’s been, we’d best be making tracks,” said Hazel, “Charlie, if you would kindly...”

Charlie grinned manically as he drew his pistol and pointed it at the man’s head.

“HOLD IT!”

All three whipped around to see Sheriff Mercy and Kid Hendrix standing at the entrance of the ranch, barring the way.

“It’s over, Picketts. You’re all under arrest.”

“Why Sheriff, you are not as intelligent as I gave you credit for if you seriously expect us to come quietly.”

“Well, I can’t say that we really expect it,” said Hendrix, “but it’d be making our lives that much simpler if you’d oblige us.”

Hazel simply smiled predatorily at Hendrix, “I must thank you Sheriff. How nice of you to bring not only yourself but Mr. Hendrix right to us as well. Saved us a world of trouble.”

“I’m afraid you’ll find that I’m a might more trouble than you’ve bargained for,” said Hendrix, moving his hand to his hip.

At the motion, Charlie brought his gun up, training it onto Hendrix, “this’ll show you for shooting my sister.”

A shot rang out.

Charlie collapsed to the ground, cradling his bleeding hand. Twenty yards away stood Mercy, her gun still smoking from the shot.

“Perhaps I wasn’t clear. You’re under arrest,” she said, sighting her gun on Mama Pickett as Hendrix did the same with Skyler.

Hazel ran to the side of her son, glaring venomously at the sheriff. “How dare you! How dare you hurt my boy!”

“Ma’am, just surrender your arms and come peaceably,” coaxed Mercy, “we can get your son a doctor and you’ll all get a fair trial.”

Hazel set her jaw as her posture slumped. “...fine.”

Cautiously, Mercy lowered her gun and moved forward, a coil of rope in hand to bind them. Too late, however, she noticed Hazel tense up, grabbing Charlie’s gun and swinging it around. It never made it as Hendrix’s gun rang out and she collapsed back into the dirt.

“Mama!” came the cries of both siblings, rushing to her side. It was clear already that the wound was not survivable.

Hendrix walked up, wincing at his handiwork. “Dammit,” he said quietly to Mercy, “I was aiming for the gun.”

“It’s unfortunate, but you saved my life. That’s still worth something.”

“Thanks. I hope it’s enough.”

Hazel coughed. “Sorry kids, I guess Mama can’t help you no more.” She looked Mercy square in the eye. “Get ‘em that fair trial, y’hear me?”

“I will.”

“Skyler. Charlie. Come close, I got something I need to tell you.”

“What is it, Mama?” asked Sky.

“We’re here,” added Charlie.

“...Rosebud.”

_ “Dammit Hazel, we totally had a moment there and you ruined it.” _

_ “It was getting too dark anyways. What’s the fun of a western that gets all dramatic?” _

x-x-x

It was several days later as Mercy watched over the bricklayers she’d hired to repair the jail. Skyler and Charlie had been taken away by the Marshalls and were awaiting trial, despite the urgings of several townsfolk to just hang them and be done with it. With the repairs on the jail nearing completion, the town was finally starting to return to normal.

A knock at the door drew Mercy out of the reverie and she hopped up to answer, finding Hendrix on her doorstep.

“Hey Kid, how’s the shoulder?” she asked.

“It’s healing up rather nicely, although I reckon that I don’t need quite as much bedrest as the good doctor suggests.”

“Best listen to him. If infection sets in, he’ll have to pull out the leeches,” she joked, “so have you decided what to do once you’re out from under his tender mercies.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll just move along. I hear there’s a good card tournament coming up back in Louisiana. Might see if I can rustle up a stake.”

Mercy nodded. “Well, I suppose you could do that. However, might I offer you an alternative?” From inside her breast pocket, she produced a small, polished brass star and held it out to him.

Hendrix stared at the badge like it was a snake in a top hat. “A Deputy? Me?” he asked.

“You’ve got good instincts and a good heart,” she said, “the rest is just practice. I could use a good partner.”

Hendrix considered the outheld star for a moment before he picked it up, tucking it into his own vest. “Why I believe that sounds like an offer I’ll just have to take up.”

“Welcome aboard, Deputy Hendrix.”

“Pleasure to be along for the ride.”

x-x-x

“And roll credits!” exclaimed Hazel.

“And don’t miss Sheriff Mercy 2: No Mercy at All,” added Charlie.

“You two are nuts,” said Mercy before giving Drix a hug, “thanks for playing with me.”

He wrapped his arms around her tightly, “anytime Merc.”

“Hey, what about the rest of us?” protested Charlie.

“Ok,” said Mercy, letting Hendrix go, “thank you for not ruining my game  _ too _ badly.”

“Well, we’re happy to— HEY!”

Mercy and Drix broke down laughing, which was soon joined by the rest of the group.

“Wait,” said Sky, “no one rode off into the sunset.”

“Huh…” said Mercy, “you’re right. Well the TV kinda glows like a sunset. Who wants to watch a movie and we’ll count that?”

“Sounds good to me,” said Sky as the group clambered onto the couches and settled in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've been on a western kick lately (Wynonna Earp _finally_ came to canadian netflix, totally worth the wait) and so I felt inspired to have the kids play make-believe again.
> 
> I had a ton of fun writing this one and I hope y'all enjoyed it too!
> 
> -Juniper


	48. Mother Knows Too Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When there is more than one couple in the house, you occasionally realize that sounds travels.

It was late. 

Really late.

Laura sagged in the driver’s seat, squeezing the wheel impatiently as she made the final turn down the darkened road leading home. She felt completely dragged out and just wanted to snuggle into bed next to her wives.

She hoped they wouldn’t be too upset with her. She’d called earlier to say she’d be late coming home, but never before had ‘late’ meant rolling in at nearly one in the morning. She cursed herself for not calling or even texting to let them know things were dragging, but there was little that could be done about that now.

Turning up the driveway, she winced as she noticed the lights still on in not only their bedroom, but downstairs as well. They’d waited up for her, and they probably wouldn’t be happy.

Laura pulled her car into the garage and took a few moments to practice her ‘I’m sorry’ pout in the rear view mirror. Hopefully, she could cute her way past an argument and into the comfortable embrace of her bed and hopefully, a snuggly set of arms. Once she was satisfied that she had just the right amount of lip quiver, she took a deep breath and headed into the house.

Inside, the lights were out in the kitchen but light spilled through from the living room where Laura could see both Danny and Carmilla sitting together on the couch, reading. Steeling herself, she dropped her bag on the kitchen table and stepped into the doorway.

“Ok. I realize it’s really late and you guys are probably super worried and angry at me for not calling, which I’m so sorry about. I was just stuck for so long on my article that when I finally figured out what to write, I got into the zone and it just started flowing, then I totally lost track of time and when I looked up at the clock it was nearly midnight and I woulda called, but I figured you would be in bed by now, which, I mean,  obviously you’re not, but you could’ve been, so I figured I shouldn’t wake you up, which I wouldn’t have done, but I could’ve and if one of you would just say something so I can stop rambling on without stop I’d really appreciate it.”

Neither Carmilla nor Danny looked up. It was like Laura hadn’t said anything at all.

She stared at them incredulously. It was possible that being so tired had left her a bit irritable, but at the moment she was too exhausted to logically consider this option as she stepped forward. “Ok, the silent treatment? Seriously? I can’t believe you two. Yes, I’m late but after over twenty years of marriage, I think I deserve a little more respect than to be shut out by my wives.”

When she still got no response from them, she stomped around the couch and stood rigid in front of them. It was only then that their attention shifted to her as they both wore looks of surprise followed by wide smiles.

While slightly confused by their reaction, Laura was not going to be deterred from her anger. “What the hell is up with you two?”

It was their turn to look confused. Danny held a finger up before tilting her head and pulling what looked like a wad of plastic out of her ear. “Ugh, forgot I was wearing those. Sorry, Laura. Couldn’t hear you, these things worked better than I expected. What’s wrong?”

Laura’s mouth open and closed speechlessly as she watched Carmilla pull a matching set of earplugs out of her own ears. 

“Cupcake?” asked Carmilla, “you okay?” She leaned forward, taking Laura’s hand.

Laura snapped out of her stupor, anger forgotten as she’d watched Danny dig her other earplug, a touch more stubborn than its sibling, out of her other ear. “Uh, yeah. I’m fine… why are you two wearing earplugs?”

“Oh,” said Danny with a slight chuckle, “Sky’s over.”

“Why does it matter if Sky is— oh…” Laura’s cheeks tinged pink as she caught Danny’s meaning.

“Yeah,” agreed Carmilla, “oh.”

“Are they really…”

“No, they kept it down,” said Danny, looking ruefully towards the stairs, “but that really doesn’t count for much when you consider we share a wall and how well Carm and I can hear. I tried to just ignore it and sleep, but I ended up giving up pretty quickly and Carm was just behind me.”

Laura winced sympathetically. “Yeeeeaaaahh. I don’t care how sex positive we are, I wouldn’t want to listen to our daughter… or surrogate daughter… or both for that matter…”

“Not that we really have the high ground here,” interjected Carmilla, “given the number of times we’ve inadvertently chased Mercy down the hall to Charlie’s room, I’d say turnabout is fair play.”

Danny chuckled and nodded. “True that.”

“Speaking of, our other children sleep through it?”

“Drix isn’t home, he spent the night at Aaron’s, and Charlie and Hazel are both sawing logs, I doubt they heard anything,” said Danny. 

“Even if they did,” said Carmilla with a smirk, “I suspect they’re all a little more accustomed than we are to putting up with… things that go bump in the night.”

“Oh yeah, totally,” agreed Danny.

“Okay, as fun as discussing our kids’ sex lives is,” Laura quipped, “I’ve had a really long day and am completely exhausted. You think it’s safe to head on up?”

Danny tilted her head, listening experimentally. “I think it’s safe. Sky is snoring… at least I hope that’s snoring.” Danny made a face.

Carmilla shoved her playfully. “It’s snoring. And side note: please never go down that line of thought ever again.”

“Seconded,” said Laura with a frown, “now c’mon, I’m tired.” She reached out a hand to Danny and Carmilla each, helping them stand up from the couch.

Taking a moment to turn out the lights, they made their way upstairs towards their own door, which was ajar, letting light spill into the hallway. As they passed Mercy’s door, Carmilla paused and perked up, getting Laura’s attention. Trying to stay quiet, she looked back and cocked her head questioningly to which Carmilla just shook her head and waved Laura forward.

“It’s nothing,” said Carmilla, once they were safely into their room with the door shut behind them, “just an idea.”

Laura studied Carmilla’s face for a moment, before shrugging and walking into the bathroom to get ready for bed. Quickly running through her nightly routine, she crawled into bed and into the arms of her wives, who were still awake and waiting for her. Danny turned out the light and they settled in and began drifting off to sleep.

“Wait a minute,” came Laura’s voice in the darkness.

“What?” asked Carmilla sleepily.

“Why didn’t you just wear the earplugs to sleep?”

“We tried,” yawned Danny, “they drove us bonkers. Would have been easier to try and sleep with... accompaniment?”

“Oh, alright… wait, accompaniment?” Laura paused. “Y’know, I think I just got an idea of my own.”

“That’s good,” said Carmilla, “we’ll compare notes in the morning. Now go to sleep.”

With only a hum of contentment in reply, Laura snuggled in and drifted off.

x-x-x

“Good morning sleepy heads!” said Laura cheerily.

It was almost noon when Sky and Mercy came sleepily down the stairs. Everyone else was well into their day, Laura, Carmilla and Danny each doing some light cleaning while Charlie and Hazel had long left on some exploit of their own.

“We didn’t do a big breakfast this morning,” said Danny, “but we ran out early and picked up some croissants. They’re in the bag on the counter.”

“That sounds great, thanks Mom.”

“You’re welcome, sweetie.”

Sky and Mercy each warmed up a pastry and sat down at the table with some butter and jam to enjoy with it. They were about halfway through when Sky looked at Danny where she was cleaning the windows and noticed something.

“Aunt Danny? Are you feeling alright? You look kinda tired.”

“Gee, thanks,” joked Danny, smiling at Sky, “I just had a bit of trouble getting to sleep last night.”

“Ooh, that reminds me,” said Laura, putting down her duster and running from the room, her voice floating from down the hall, “while we were getting breakfast, we found something that we hope you’ll like.” She walked back in with a stack of three small boxes.

“Bluetooth speakers?” said Mercy.

“One for each of your rooms,” replied Laura, “we thought it’d be nice for you to be able to easily listen to music during the day… ar even at night. Never know what it might come in handy for...”

“Night?” asked Mercy suspiciously, “you sure? I mean we share a wa—” Mercy stopped and turned dark red as she gaped at her mother.

“What? I don’t get it,” asked Sky, “what does it have to do with Aunt Danny not— you heard us last night didn’t you.” Sky turned pink herself, though she was obviously not quite as mortified as her girlfriend.

“‘Fraid so, sweetheart,” said Carmilla, leaning on a broom handle.

“Moms, I’m so sorry,” said Mercy, “I—”

“Hey hey hey,” interrupted Danny, “it’s ok. You tried, just... wolf ears, y’know?”

“Oh yeah, I know,” replied Mercy, gathering herself enough for a smirk back at her mother, “well, we’ll try to be a little more considerate in future…”

Sky nodded in agreement.

“...and use this little gift to make things a bit less obvious,” Mercy added, picking up the box to look at what was included, the wheels in her head obviously already turning.

“Well, on that note, I have one more gift for you,” said Carmilla, digging into one of the kitchen drawers.

Mercy eyed Carmilla warily. “Oh, good. And what would that be?”

“Scented candles!” said Carmilla, slapping down a set of multicolour pillars on the counter as she, Laura and Danny burst out laughing..

Turning red once more, Mercy and Sky couldn’t help but join in the laughter themselves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a counter-point to ‘Nope nope nope nope nope!’ TMI goes both ways, even if it only amounts to just a bit of ribbing with this family. I’ve had this on my list for a while, but could never find a way to deliver it without sounding lewd, but I think I managed it. As I’m sure most of you have noticed, I adore innuendo, but I prefer to shy away from stuff right on the nose, mostly cause it’s not as funny.
> 
> I hope you all found this entertaining and I'll see you next week!
> 
> -Juniper


	49. Lost in the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sudden appearance of a strange intruder in their territory presents a dangerous threat to the pack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Warnings: Descriptions of mild blood, violence and death.

“—and so I look up and this poor kid’s face and most of his, of course,  _ white _ shirt is completely blue. Apparently, he'd decided he liked fountain pens and was trying to use one to take notes.”

“Wait,” said Laura as Danny took a sip of her beer, “did the pen explode in his face or something?”

“Nothing quite so dramatic,” she replied, kicking back to rest her feet on the deck railing, “apparently, it's not such a great idea to have an open bottle of ink sitting around without a proper inkwell. He flipped over his notebook when I referred to last week's lecture and the ink just went along for the ride.”

Carmilla cackled. “Seriously? How old was that pen that he needed to keep filling the reservoir?”

“Not sure. He just described it as ‘vintage’.”

“In other words,” snarked Carmilla, “‘obsolete but having it makes me feel superior’.” She took a long draught of her own beer to punctuate her statement.

“Sounds about right,” Danny agreed, “luckily for him, one of my other students took pity on him and was going to email him a copy of the notes, since most of his were also caught in—”

A loud, savage howl echoed out of the woods, drawing their attention. While wolf howls were a common enough occurrence on the pack lands, none of them recognized the timbre of this one. It carried a rough, almost broken, undertone that could only be described as bestial. It sent a chill down each of their spines.

“What the hell was that?!” exclaimed Laura, looking to her wives whose gazes were locked on the tree line, concern painted on their faces.

“A feral wolf, I think,” said Danny, “but I hope I'm wrong.”

“You're not wrong,” whispered Carmilla, a clear tremor of fear in her voice, “Danny, we need the pack… now.”

“Wait, really?” asked Laura, “how do we know it's not just passing through?”

“No, Carm's right, something's wrong here” said Danny, “our scent is throughout the woods for miles, even a feral wolf acting on instinct wouldn't draw attention to itself, unless… oh god, we need to call Drix and Ruth.” Danny ran into the house, leaving a scared and confused Laura looking to Carmilla for explanation.

“Unless what? What's wrong?”

“Unless it smelled something that made hunting worth the risk,” finished Carmilla, “vampire blood can help ferals regain some semblance of control.”

Laura paled, glancing towards the woods. “And everywhere that the pack’s scent is…”

“...ours is as well.”

“Would it be able to track the scents back to any of our houses? Wouldn't the smells be too mixed up to make a trail?” asked Laura.

“God, I hope so, but I sure as hell am not gonna bet the safety of our family on that.”

Laura frowned. “Can we do anything for it?”

“Probably not,” admitted Carmilla, nervously running a hand through her hair, “if it's held onto some shred of rationality, we may be able to calm it enough for Zeke or Laf to do something, but like Danny said, the fact that it's acting so strangely…”

Laura wilted, nodding in understanding

Danny ran back out of the house, phone still up to her ear. “—we'll meet you out there, bud. Please be careful, this thing is gonna be after you every bit as much as the girls. See you soon.” Ending the call, Danny tossed her phone onto the table, leaning over it for a moment to regain some composure. “Hayden and Aero are safe. Ruth is holing up with all their kids in the basement while Scout and Ava guard the house. If the feral attacks them, there's gonna be nothing but shreds of it left by the time we get there.

“What about Drix and Levy?” pressed Carmilla, the edge of the table cracking under her nervous grip.

“That's the bad news. Jaq and Levy are apparently out by the lake. Aaron’s calling them so they know to get up a tree, but we still need to meet Drix out there.”

“Well what are we waiting for? Let's go!” said Carmilla, pushing back her chair and leaping from the deck, landing as a panther in the yard. Looking back, she eyed Danny impatiently as she kneaded the earth, ready to run.

“Right,” said Danny turning to Laura, “call everyone that you can think of. This thing might be after vampires, but I doubt it'd hesitate to attack anyone else. I don't want anyone who can't defend themselves out before we've dealt with this.”

“On it,” said Laura as Danny shifted and joined Carmilla on the lawn.

Craning her head skyward, Danny took a deep breath and let out a powerful howl. This was not the bright, cheery call that punctuated most runs. This was a war cry. A call to allies and a warning to enemies. 

As they pushed off into the brush, answering calls came from all directions as the able members of the pack acknowledged their Alpha and set off. However, it took several long moments before Carmilla and Danny heard the call they were listening for: Drix's long and low roar, echoing from somewhere near the lake’s southern bank.

Suppressing the urge to speed up, lest she run into their assailant completely exhausted, Danny loosed two more short howls, before closing towards Drix's answer.

They ran for several more minutes before a foul and unfamiliar stench on the air made them slow to a more cautious speed. Moving carefully through the woods, they came upon the most filthy, scraggly wolf they had ever seen. 

She was nearly as large as Danny, but with strangely oversized shoulders and a wide muzzle, almost like a hound. She paced back and forth, gaze fixed up a tree. Every once in a while, she would growl at whatever was holding her attention.

An answering snarl told Danny and Carmilla precisely what was up there. Drix was somewhere in the branches, safely out of reach, but taunting the feral, keeping her occupied and away from any innocents until help could arrive.

Carmilla felt a surge of pride at her son's smart thinking before something else occurred to her. Nudging Danny to get her attention, Carmilla gestured with her head up the tree trunk they'd taken shelter beside. Receiving a nod, she quietly got a grip and ascended.

Breaking through the lower canopy and into the more open spaces of the upper branches, Carmilla's hunch was confirmed. Perched in the same tree as Drix, hidden from the ground in the upper reaches, were Jaq and Levy, the latter in her owl form. They were both looking right back at her with hopeful expressions.

Carmilla held a paw up to her muzzle, miming a ‘hush’ gesture as best she could before disappearing back down into the leaves, glad to know her grandkids were safe from harm. 

She reached the ground, using a paw to point at Drix then up above, conveying the situation to Danny, who seemed to catch her meaning. Then she opted for a much less ambiguous gesture as she held up a paw and made a show of unsheathing her claws. Danny nodded resolutely and howled once again, highly pleased when a series of barks and yips came from very near by.

Danny and Carmilla pushed out of the underbrush, putting them face to face with the feral, who looked very surprised by the howl and sounds of the pack coming in. She kept looking nervously around them but her gaze kept falling back on Carmilla, full of desperation.

Danny's heart fell. She'd been expecting an animal, a beast whose humanity had been consumed by instinct. But there was still light in this wolf’s eyes, the pain of a person still grasping at their last thread.

Around them, the pack quickly materialized out of the brush. Mercy and Sky took up positions flanking the base of the tree, ensuring the safety of their brother and nieces. The remainder pushed in, forcing her away from the tree.

Fear clouded her eyes and both Danny and Carmilla could see the growing resolve in her stance. There was only a moment's notice as the feral tensed and leapt forward, intent on Carmilla. Carmilla, raised her paw, ready to strike, but Zach was faster.

He bowled into the feral from the side, sending her crashing to the ground before he threw himself on top of her. She struggled to free herself from beneath his bulk, but at over twice her size, he had her completely pinned. Eventually, she gave up and simply whined plaintively.

Shifting back to their human states, Danny and Carmilla crouched down by the feral’s exposed face, where it met their gaze with a blend of sadness and yearning.

“Can you understand me?” asked Danny, watching for a response. The feral glanced at her momentarily, a flash of something intelligent in her eyes, before she refocused on Carmilla

“What do you want to do?” asked Carmilla.

“I don’t know,” admitted Danny, “she’s delirious, possibly psychotic, but she isn’t some mindless animal that we have to put down. There’s no way she asked for this. She’d have a sire to care for her if this was deliberate. She was probably just lucky, or unlucky enough to survive an attack.”

Carmilla sadly regarded the wolf before nodding as she came to a resolution. Without another word, she raked her fingers across her left palm, slicing a gash which immediately began to bleed, flooding the area with the metallic scent of blood The feral began struggling again as her pupils blew out at the sight of the prize she sought.

“Carm, what the hell are you doing?” cried Danny, distressed at the sight of her wife hurting herself.

Carmilla looked at her palm as the gash knit itself shut, leaving only the blood behind. “Testing a hypothesis,” she explained, “if it works, we may have a chance to help her. Zach, keep her pinned. I don’t want her to be able to lunge forward.”

He gave her a sarcastic look, as if to say, ‘how’s that different from what I was doing already?’.

“You sure about this?” asked Danny.

“No, but it’s the best plan I have.”

Danny chuckled, “The fact that a terrible plan is our best plan is not really a selling point.”

Carmilla shared in the laugh. “Now where have I heard that before?”

“I dunno. Some old internet video I imagine,” said Danny, before looking serious again, “be careful. I’m right here beside you.”

“I know, I’m glad,” said Carmilla, clasping one of Danny’s hands in her clean one before letting go and shuffling up to the feral. She tentatively held her left hand forward, “alright, this might help you think a little more clearly. Please don’t bite me.”

Stretching her neck, the feral pushed her muzzle forward and began to lap gently at Carmilla’s hand. It only took a few seconds before every bit of blood was cleaned up.”

Shuffling back again, Carmilla kept watch to see if the blood had indeed helped. Then slowly, the eyes which had lost focus upon licking up the blood, zeroed back in on Carmilla’s as her pupils contracted, making her gaze look far more human than it had previously.

“Can you understand me? Can you shift?” asked Carmilla.

The feral looked confused, but after a second the wolf was replaced with a small, trembling woman. Zach tentatively got up, letting her loose but remained tense. She looked to be in about her mid-thirties and was covered in what looked like weeks of grime and her clothes were in tatters. She hugged herself tightly, hunching her shoulders as she began to rock back and forth.

“Hello, my name’s Danny and this is my pack.” She gestured around the circle, taking a step towards the woman. “What’s your name? Where are you from?”

“I… don’t know…” she spoke haltingly, as if the words caused her pain “hard… think… remember… water… sand… fur… teeth…”

“From the coast, sounds like,” said Carmilla, “or attacked there at least.”

“Yes… attacked… not dead... woke hungry…” she stuttered, “ate… chickens… cats… dogs…”

“People?” asked Danny.

“No… not people… afraid… hid… still hungry... ran…”

“And made your way here,” supplied Carmilla, “where you smelled us?”

“Yes… smelled…” she struggled, “smelled right… like prey…need more…”

“Alright, hold on,” Carmilla said, getting ready to make another gash, “I can give you a bit more and then we can get you some help.”

“N-n-n-no…” said the woman, her pupils beginning to noticeably dilate again, “need… MORE!”

The woman leapt towards Carmilla, her body beginning to shift when a blur sped past the perimeter of wolves and into the fray. Before anyone knew what was happening, the young woman lay dead on the ground, her head at an unnatural angle and over her stood Dr. Antos.

“Zeke?” Carmilla’s eyes widened at the sudden appearance of the family’s doctor. The strike had even been too fast for her to detect.

“I’m sorry, child,” said Zeke, “but I’ve dealt with the Abandoned before. She was beyond help.”

“How the hell can you be so certain?” yelled Danny, enraged at what seemed like a senseless death.

“I’d been watching for a while, young one,” said Zeke sadly, “I came as soon as Ms. Hollis got a hold of me. I had hopes, just like you did, that you could save this one, but she’d been like this too long. Recovery is usually possible within the first week of infection, but without a sire to properly care for the fledgling, the virus begins to consume all that is human about the host, most notably the mind.”

Carmilla was in tears. “But she came back, she was here.”

“And then she was gone again. Were she treatable, that much blood would have let her keep her mind for hours, not minutes. Even if we’d used Ser Lafontaine’s serums to drive out the virus and heal her physical ailments, her mind was already rewritten. Every second of her waking life would have been a semi-conscious agony. This was a kindness, child.”

Carmilla remained silent, glaring at Zeke with rage and sadness. She set her jaw and pushed past him to where the body of the nameless woman lay on the forest floor. “We need to get her out of here so she doesn’t scare the kids when they come down.” Gently, she knelt down and, almost reverently, lifted the woman’s body. “Danny?” she said, voice thick with tears, “I’ll meet you at home.”

Danny looked sadly at her wife and nodded before Carmilla sped off into the trees. Slumping down, she wiped her eyes, holding back tears of her own. “Thank you all for coming so quickly. I wish this could have ended better, but we’re all safe so I guess that’s what matters…” she paused, “I don’t know what to say. This feels so wrong.” She sniffled again as Zach came up and wrapped an arm around her 

“That’s because it is wrong,” said Zach, “innocent deaths should never be right, even when it’s for the best.”

“The best?” asked Danny, startled, “you agree with him?”

“I do. All I could feel from her was pain and even with the blood, it was the barest flicker, like a dying ember,” he said, “Zeke may be startlingly frank about some things, but he’s never been flippant about death. You’re allowed to be angry at him, but I think it’s still worth trusting him.”

“Thanks Zach, I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

“Anytime. C’mon, let’s all head over to Mom and Dad’s. I don’t think being alone would be good for any of us right now.”

Paul yipped from where he’d been watching quietly, seconding Zach’s suggestion.

“Alright,” said Danny, “sounds good. Uh, Dr. Antos…”

“It’s alright Ms. Lawrence,” said Zeke, “even if you wanted to invite me I would turn it down. Your family needs time to heal and having part of the cause of the wound around won’t help. I’ll be in touch.” With a sad smile, he walked away through the trees, leaving the pack as they helped the girls down.

x-x-x

Carmilla stood in the clearing, most of the pack at her back. It had taken them a couple days to build a proper pyre, but now it was ready with the unnamed woman atop it. She lay upon a bed of wildflowers that the grandkids had gathered in a desire to help. 

Carmilla tried to think of some words to eulogize the soul before her, but her mind was drawing a blank. Her shoulders sadly slumped until arms reached around her shoulders from either side as her wives cuddled close to her. “I don’t know what to say…”

“It’s alright,” said Laura, “you don’t have to say anything.”

Carmilla nodded before catching Drix’s attention. Returning her nod they each turned their focus to the dry tinder. Moments later, at each end of the pyre, the wood caught alight and flames quickly spread the length and before long, the whole thing was ablaze.

Carmilla watched the fire sadly, drawing comfort from her wives, as she noticed Zeke enter the clearing. A surge of anger bubbled up, but she tamped it down as she watched him lay a bouquet of some sort against the fire where it was quickly consumed by the conflagration. Looking over, he caught her gaze and walked over to see her.

“Hyacinth and Plumeria,” he said, “an apology and a wish of protection for her.”

“Apology?” Carmilla asked, bitterly.

“Yes, though whether she forgives me is anyone’s guess.”

Carmilla snorted derisively, though said nothing as Laura or Danny, she wasn’t certain who, began stroking her back comfortingly.

“You’ve gone soft, my dear,” said Zeke, holding up a finger to forestall her protest, “and it is my sincerest wish that you remain that way. It has taken a long time to heal the wounds left by your mother and you don’t deserve any more. This was a necessary evil, but one that you, none of you”—he added, looking sadly at Danny—”should have to bear. Don’t carry this. Love each other, blame me if it helps, but remember that you tried to help this poor woman and protected your family, not the final result.” Nodding respectfully, he turned and began to walk away.

“Zeke?” Carmilla called after him and he turned back, “talk to Laf. They took samples from her. They are going after the virus. If you really want forgiveness, help them make sure that this doesn’t happen to anyone else.”

He smiled. “It would be my honour.” He turned and walked away, with far more spring in his step than he’d had a moment ago.

Carmilla smiled in spite of her grief before turning back to the pyre. “We will do this right for her. She lost whatever family had to that damned virus, so we’re gonna be her family and we always do right by our family dammit.”

“Damn straight,” said Danny.

“I guess you thought of something to say after all,” said Laura.

“I guess I did, but something feels missing.” She looked at Danny who nodded solemnly.

In moments, every pack member who could had shifted and they raised their voices to the heavens. A low and mournful howl for the family member who found them too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know. This is a bit of a heavy one. I think I still have some of Jessi's feels boxes around here if anyone needs one. *pulls one out and blows dust off*
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter in spite of that. Let me know what you think.
> 
> -Juniper


	50. Your Worst Enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like a pleasant lunch out with a friend...

> **_CK_ **
> 
> _[Bored.]_  
>  _[Lunch?]_
> 
> _[Sure!]_  
>  _[Usual place?]_
> 
> _[Sounds good.]_  
>  _[See you 1-ish]_  
>  _Read at 11:53am_

It was shortly after one when Laf got to the diner where they found Carmilla already sipping on a milkshake, a novel open as she kicked back in the booth. Noticing Laf, she snapped the book close and raised her milkshake in greeting, though remaining stretched out on the bench seat.

“Sorry I’m late,” said Laf, tossing their jacket into the booth ahead of them, “I actually hit traffic. Apparently, a deer herd just wandered onto the road. No one can quite figure out why.”

Carmilla paused mid-sip, nearly choking on her milkshake. “That would probably be my fault. I was late so I was running here full tilt and kinda spooked a herd on my way in.”

“Huh, well between road full of speeding cars and a charging cougar—”

“Panther,” said Carmilla, annoyed.

“That too.” Laf ducked as a wadded up straw wrapper came flying across the table at them. They just laughed. “Between the two, I know I’d take my chances with the cars.”

“If I knew you were gonna invite me out just to make fun of me, I woulda stayed home,” groused Carmilla, “I could be having a nap right now.”

Laf just chuckled as they ordered a butterscotch milkshake before pausing. “Wait? Invited  _ you _ out? This was your idea…”

“No… you texted me… ‘scienced out; need to refuel; lunch at the diner?’”

“Okay, that makes even less sense. I haven’t been in the lab today.” Laf pulled out their phone and began fiddling with it. “Waitaminute… look at your messenger. Do you have an odd gap in our conversation chain too?”

Carmilla pulled her own phone out. “No gap, but my last message is ‘See you 1-ish’. I don’t remember sending that.”

“Probably because you didn’t, even if your phone did.” Laf began looking around the room suspiciously. 

Their server delivered their milkshake, eyeing Laf’s behaviour oddly. “Everything alright?”

Laf jumped a little. “Huh? Oh yeah. Everything is fine…” They took another glance around.

“Oookay,” said their server uncertainly, “are you ready to order?”

“Oh, sure. Cheeseburger with a side caesar,” said Laf.

“Bacon cheeseburger with fries, side of mayo for the fries, please,” said Carmilla, holding out the folded menus for the server.

“Always with the mayo,” said Lafontaine, “I don’t get how you can stand that.”

“It’s european and tasty, thank you very much.”

“It’s gross is what it is and…” they trailed off as their eyes widened before they ducked down.

“What?” asked Carmilla.

“I think I know what happened with our phones,” they said, “we’re in trouble.”

“What, why?”

“Look in the corner booth, try not to be too obvious about it.”

Slowly turning her head, Carmilla glanced back to where Laf was indicating and there, in the corner booth, sipping a mug of something, was Charlie, wearing a beret and what appeared to be a stick-on pencil moustache.

“Okay, so we know who invited us out,” said Carmilla, turning to face Lafontaine again, “now, what do we do about it? Should we leave? Get our burgers to go?”

Laf raised their head to take another glance. Charlie hadn’t seemed to have noticed that they’d seen her. “Evacuate? In our moment of triumph? I think you overestimate their chances”

“Okay, one: quoting Tarkin right before he went ‘boom’ is not really an argument for sticking around and two: what? We’re having lunch, not making a last stand. We could easily go have a picnic.

“No, don’t you see?” said Laf, “we know they’re up to something. If we can figure out what they’re up to, it’ll put us one up on them.”

Carmilla glanced back at Charlie before returning her attention to Laf. “Ok fine, we’ll stick around, but if this blows up in our face, I’m blaming you.”

“Deal. Now all we have to do is remain vigilant and wait for them to make their move.” They took a sip from their milkshake, looking shiftily from side to side.

Carmilla rolled her eyes, taking a sip from her own milkshake. “Assuming they haven’t already. Who knows, maybe they spiked the milkshakes.”

Laf paused, going wide eyed. They spat the milkshake in their mouth back into the glass, and pulled the straw out, sniffing at the drink.

“Okay. Down scientist. I was being sarcastic,” Carmilla scolded, “I highly doubt our kids are gonna poison us for the sake of a prank. If there was something, we’d have tasted it already and really I'd expect them to be a little more creative.”

Lafontaine eyes flicked back and forth between Carmilla and the drink before nodding reluctantly and lowering the straw back into the glass. Cautiously, they took another sip, rolling it around in their mouth before bobbing their head acceptingly.

“Y’see? Now calm down.”

“Right. You’re right,” said Laf, though they remained tense, much to Carmilla’s annoyance.

“Anyways,” said Carmilla, sitting up, “any new projects coming up in the lab?”

“Oh,” said Laf, relaxing at the change of topic, “I’ve started to look into ways to try and grow polyester with bacteria. I got the idea when I noticed that—”

“Alright, we’ve got the cheeseburger with salad and the bacon cheeseburger with fries,” interrupted the server, setting down the food, “that everything?”

“A side of mayo?” said Carmilla, making a quick survey to make sure she hadn’t missed it.

“Right, be right back,” chirped the server, turning back to the kitchen.

“Or you could eat fries like a normal person and just use ketchup,” teased Laf, picking up and shaking the squeeze bottle.

Carmilla narrowed her eyes at Laf, looking very much like Laura in their opinion, before looking back towards the kitchen, seeing the server walkout, a small dish of mayonnaise in hand. However, what she also noticed near the kitchen was Aaron, wearing a Beatles style, bowl cut wig. He seemed to be signalling something. Curious, she turned to look back at Charlie whose look had changed completely. Now, she was done up in a fedora and handlebar moustache. 

She thanked the server before looking across at Laf. “Okay,  _ now _ I think we may want to be paranoid.”

Laf froze, about to take a bite of their burger. “Why?”

“Well, take a look at Charlie. I also just spotted Aaron over behind the counter.” She nodded towards where she saw him.

“What was he doing?”

“Signalling something to Charlie.”

Lafontaine looked past Carmilla at Charlie before putting the burger down, opening it up and beginning to go through it layer by layer. Carmilla looked bug-eyed at Lafontaine’s action for a moment before beginning to pull apart her own burger.

“Is everything alright?” asked the server, hurrying up to the table.

“Just fine,” said Laf. They looked at their fingers, messy from the activity, “if we could maybe get a few napkins.”

“And a spare plate,” said Carmilla absently as she seemed to be running out of room to neatly lay out her burger pieces on top of her bed of fries.

“Oh… okay…” their server responded with a concerned look, walking off to fetch the items.

“Anything in yours?” asked Carmilla.

“Nothing yet,” said Laf as they grabbed a knife to begin scraping into the melted cheese.

“Napkins and a plate,” said their server, frowning at their table in confusion, “are you sure everything is alright?”

Carmilla looked up from where she was cutting into her burger, smiling at the server. “Yeah, thanks.” She returned to her plate and their server decided to just back away from the table. Carmilla popped a piece of burger patty into her mouth, chewing experimentally. “Tastes fine.”

“This doesn’t make sense,” said Laf as Carmilla began reassembling her burger, “they have to have done something. Why else would they go to the trouble of disguises and signals?”

“Who knows?” said Carmilla, looking satisfied that her burger was back together, “maybe whatever it is, is in your salad.”

Laf went wide eyed and began picking apart the salad, getting dressing all over their fingers as they placed pieces of lettuce and croutons one by one onto the spare plate. Carmilla just shook her head and finally began to eat her burger.

x-x-x

Carmilla lazily sopped the last bit of mayo out of the dish with her last fry as Laf ate one of the last bites of their salad, still inspecting each forkful before consuming it.

“Well, so much for paranoia,” said Carmilla.

“No kidding,” agreed Laf, “at this point, I just want them to do whatever they’re going to do to get it over with.”

The server, who’d been avoiding their table for the past little while came up to their booth with a platter. “Got a treat for you two. Slices of our signature strawberry pie, courtesy of the young woman in the corner there.”

“Uh, thanks,” said Laf as the server walked off.

Sharing a look of confusion, they both turned to look at Charlie. She was now wearing a ten-gallon hat and a huge moustache, twice the width of her face. Looking right back at them, she tipped her hat before standing up and walking over.

“Afternoon Mama, Laf,” greeted Charlie, “mind if I take a seat?”

“Please,” said Carmilla, shuffling over to make room as Charlie took a seat, a huge grin plastered across her face, “alright my dear, what is going on?”

“Whatever are you talking about, Mama dearest?” Charlie affected an innocent look, which was somewhat undermined by the ridiculous get-up she was wearing. “I was simply enjoying a lovely lunch at our favourite diner. Great burgers here.”

“Oh no,” countered Laf, “if that’s the case, what’s with the costumes? and Aaron behind the counter?”

“I have friends besides Charlie you know,” said Aaron as her walked up, now wearing blonde shepard-girl pigtails, “I was simply chatting with my friend Adrianne in the kitchen as she worked today and as for the costumes”—he stroked the wig—”sometimes I just like to feel pretty.”

“Come on, look at all this” said Carmilla, gesturing to the landscape of wadded napkins, dirty cutlery and greasy fingerprints that was their table.

“Yes, you really made a mess of your table,” said Charlie, “I think you freaked out your server.”

“No kidding, remind me to leave a massive tip,” said Laf, “you two might as well put your little prank on hold cause what we did to ourselves has got to be worse than whatever you… had… planned— oh you little brats!” They looked between the two kids as they shared a high-five, a disbelieving grin forcing its way onto their face.

“What?” asked Carmilla, feeling left behind.

“All they did was set up lunch and wear silly outfits,” Laf said, “and proceeded to watch as we put ourselves through hell.”

Carmilla turned to look at her daughter, jaw falling open as she smiled. “They’re right. You’re both brats. Well played.”

“Thank you, thank you,” said Aaron, taking a seat beside Laf, “and don’t worry about lunch. I wasn’t lying about my friend here, she comped the meal and Char and I took care of the tip, since your poor server wasn’t in on it.

“Well then, thank you as well,” said Carmilla, “I’d say that makes this worth it.

“Now, to the victor go the spoils,” said Laf, “or a share of them at least. Want some pie?”

“Sounds great,” said Charlie, stealing her mother’s fork and taking a piece of pie, “I guess there’s only one thing left to do.” She popped the bite into her mouth, handing the now empty fork back to Carmilla 

“Oh?” said Carmilla, prying a huge strawberry off the crust “and what’s that?”

Charlie nodded to Aaron and they each made eye contact with Laf and Carmilla across the table and spoke in unison.

“Your move.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so we have our first stand-alone entry into the prank war. This one was doubly inspired by a similar idea from the comic Foxtrot by Bill Amend and a video by a comedy troupe I adore (https://youtu.be/9OJ-V4yawTA?list=FLWSyxtdRBkPlwNqhfN2C3JQ, if you're curious). I hope to keep the prank war going at random intervals (aka when I can think of something) and prompts for pranks are always welcome.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed this and let us know what you thought.
> 
> -Juniper


	51. Seemingly Impawsible

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's all fun and games until someone has an identity crisis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Implied Child Abuse

“C’mon Remi, just lift up your paw and put it into my hand.”

Scout held her hand out towards the tiny wolf pup, who simply stared at her with wonder.

“Hon’, she may be able to shift, but she’s barely a year old. I doubt she understands what you mean,” said Ruth, sitting cross-legged on the couch above them, watching the interaction with fascination.

“I know we started developing Landon’s fine motor control about this age, how did we do that?” asked Scout, grimacing with frustration.

“I dunno,” mused Ruth, deep in thought, “I only remember Landon doing it, not actually teaching her. I think Ava actually was still taking mat leave. Maybe she taught Landon while we weren’t home.”

“Maybe... Ava?” Scout called, listening intently for their wife, but silence was the only answer, “shoot, she’s still out. Maybe she used an instruction manual. Take paw A and insert into open hand B.” Scout took hold of Remi’s forepaw and drew it up, holding it in a short paw shake. Remi looked at her mother’s hand and back to her face, no more understanding than before.

Ruth put a finger to her lips in thought. “Y’know, you might be onto something there. We just need to go back another step.”

“What do you mean?” asked Scout as Ruth got up, moving to sit beside Remi.

“Just use the same instructions you were before,” said Ruth before shifting, leaving a massive tiger now sitting in the same spot.

Scout looked between them before her a look of realization dawned on her face. “Okay. Lift your paw and put it in my hand.”

Remi’s expression remained just as blank as before but movement from her mother beside her drew her attention. Ruth lifted her paw, moving it forwards before placing her huge paw onto Scout’s hand… right before the weight of the limb slammed it into the floor. Ruth quickly recoiled, ducking her head in contrition as Scout rubbed the back of her hand where it had hit the hardwood. 

Scout fixed Ruth with a wry look. “Ok, let’s try this again… lift your paw and  _ place  _ it in my hand.”

A bit more gingerly, Ruth lifted her leg up and gently laid it across Scout’s palm, keeping her weight off of it this time. Scout smiled at Ruth’s paw before looking at Remi, whose head was tilted at the display. Her front paw was lifting and falling, softly tapping on the floor.

“Ok Remi, your turn,” said Scout, shuffling back towards Remi, “lift your paw and put it in my hand.”

The puppy lifted her right paw and moved it forward, dropping it short of Scout’s hand. Looking down at her paw, Remi regarded the limb with confusion.

“You almost did it, Rem!” said Scout, drawing the pup’s face back to hers, “c’mon, try again!”

Remi once again lifted her paw before moving it up and placing it in Scout’s hand. An enormous smile blossomed on Scout’s face as she rubbed a thumb over the paw. Beside the puppy, a deep whuff of satisfaction came from Ruth.

“Ok, other paw,” said Scout, putting her hand back out. Remi, once again, placed her right paw into her mother’s hand, looking to her mother for approval with a wagging tail. Beside her, Ruth chuffed quietly with laughter.

“I don’t think she quite gets the concept of ‘other’ yet, babe,” said Ava Regan, from where she was standing in the kitchen, surrounded by groceries.

“So I gathered,” replied Scout, craning her neck to see Ava, “any suggestions?”

“Use your other hand, maybe?”

Scout closed her eyes in annoyance that she hadn’t thought of it. Opening her eyes again, she met Ruth’s gaze, ready to stare down any mocking look, but she only got a shrug from the tiger. “Ok, let’s try that,” she said, holding her right hand out to the youngster, “alright sweetie, put your other paw in my hand.”

The youngster compiled this time, mirroring her mother and placing her left paw this time.

“Very good, sweetie!” Scout put Remi’s paw down and reached forward with both hands, scratching Remi behind the ears. “Okay, something a bit different.” She held her left hand up again in a ‘high five’ position. “Put your paw against my hand.”

Remi stared at this new position for a moment before lifting her paw and draping it over top of Scout’s fingertips, looking at her mother with a tilted head.

Scout dropped her head and chuckled. “I guess we haven’t reached the concept of ‘against’ either.”

“Nope,” agreed Ava, “though for a one-year-old, she’s doing really well.”

“Wait…” said Ruth, shifting back, “didn’t you do this with Landon at about the same age?”

Ava looked at Ruth with a look of concern. “Uh, not really. I started exercising her limbs, getting her used to the canine motions but she was a few months older before we got to ‘shake-a-paw’.

Ruth winced. “I really hate when you guys refer to playing with our kids like we’re making them do tricks. It’s demeaning.”

“Oh give me a bloody break,” said Ava with a laugh, “who was playing fetch with Landon just last night?”

“That wasn’t fetch,” Ruth protested, “it was catch… with a lot of running… and dropping… and drool—okay, it was fetch. It just feels like we’re treating them like pets when we call it that.”

Scout gathered up Remi into a cuddle, smiling at Ruth. “I think so long as you don’t reward them with treats or use a clicker, you’re in the clear. You just have to keep in mind that most ‘tricks’ were developed because they benefitted the dog in some fashion, so they’re generally pretty good for us as well. I still remember my first game of fetch with Grandpa Joe. Grandma Bev just about tore his head off when he tossed the ball into lake, but damn if I didn’t get it back out of there.”

Ruth chuckled. “I still sometimes have trouble remembering that you grew up with this stuff. I was just an ordinary human girl. An ordinary human in baroque france, but human nonetheless. I didn’t get the tiger ‘til after I was killed and Maman gave me the old ‘cold reboot’. No games, no tricks, just training from Mattie and Mir.”

“Mir?” asked Ava.

Ruth chuckled. “Carmilla. She’s changed her name over the years, felt it gave her a degree of freedom from Maman. But like I was saying, I wasn’t lucky enough to grow up playing games with my family.”

A shadow passed over Ava’s face. “...yeah.”

Ruth took one look and knew she’d screwed up. In a blur, she sped across the room and into the kitchen, wrapping her arms around Ava and pulling her close. “Oh baby, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to pull those memories up.”

Ava sniffled, tears edging out of her eyes in spite of her best efforts. “It’s okay, you didn’t mean to.”

“Ava, it’s alright. Just let it out,” whispered Ruth and Ava just buried her face into Ruth’s neck, stifling her sobs. They remained that way for several minutes before Ava lifted her face away, red but looking calmer.

“Here,” said Scout, offering a tissue with one hand, an infant hitched on her hip with the other, “I could just tear apart those bastards for doing that to you. I still wish we could have ended it last year.”

“No, you don’t,” said Ava, taking the tissue, “it would have left you scarred, to say nothing of if any of the kids had seen it.” Ava took a deep breath. “Back when I was their age, it wasn’t all bad. There were good days, playing with my brother, even occasionally with my mother or father; I try to hold onto those. As for now, I don’t know what’s happened to them and I don’t want to know. Being certain they can’t threaten us again is enough.”

Scout threw her free arm around the cuddle. “Alright, so long as you’re okay, that’s enough for me.”

“Thanks, love,” Ava said with another sniffle, “I love you both.”

The three held each other close for another few minutes, just enjoying each other’s presence, when a dull thump emanated from outside. Both Scout and Ruth began to look concerned, but Ava got a huge grin on her face.

“What?” asked Ruth.

“Well, you know how you were lamenting how you never got to grow up playing games as a cat before I had my little pity party?”

“It wasn’t a pity party, so don’t get down on yourself about that, but yes, I recall.”

Ava smiled. “Well, I don’t think it’ll be quite as much of an issue for Hayden and Aero. Y’see, I bought a small tub for Landon, and Remi eventually, while I was out, to make it a little easier to clean them up after runs. I asked the twins to set it up so I could fill it and if I’m right…” Ava trailed off as she tilted her head towards the yard.

Curious, Ruth led them out the back door onto the patio where they could see a small, round, plastic tub set up on the lawn with little Landon sitting a few yards away, regarding it curiously. What was also noticeable was a snow leopard, Aero, curled up within the confines of the otherwise empty tub. A second, nearly identical snow leopard, Hayden, came bounding across the lawn and jumped into the little bit of free space in the tub, forcing the Aero up and over the edge so that her legs were sitting on the lawn. However, she didn’t remain there for long as she foisted herself back in, landing right on top of him and the two slid so they were both on their backs, their paws flailing in the air being the only parts of them visible from the patio.

Ruth couldn’t help but smile at the pair as they wrestled for the space.

“If they fits, they sits,” said Scout cheekily. 

“Among other things,” said Ava. Ruth noticed that she was recording the pair with her phone.

“Y’know, that’s not really not helping your case of it not making our kids a show,” Ruth joked.

“Oh come off of it, these are gonna be some fantastic memories and you know it,” protested Ava before smiling thoughtfully, “some great memories for all of us.”

Ruth chuckled. “Y’know, that’s some reasoning I can get behind. In fact…” Ruth went and grabbed a tennis ball from the patio table. “Landon! Wanna play?”

The youngster tore her attention away from her roiling siblings and yipped happily, bolting out onto the open lawn to wait.

“Alright!” called Ruth, “go for it!” And with a flick of her wrist, sent the ball sailing across the yard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little pile of fluff today. The two animal bits were inspired by some short vids I found on tumblr that I'll link below.  
> Enjoy!  
> -Juniper
> 
> Puppy: http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/160457483578/oh-look-a-writing-prompt  
> Kitties: http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/161189294028/cognitive-exper-ti-se-brookenomicon-slams


	52. Jump the Circumstance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All ~~good~~ things must come to an end

Laura looked at herself in the mirror, studying her reflection. The girl staring back at her seemed strange, familiar yet as agreed never been before.

_ How did it come to this?  _

_ After all these years, all this time, it’s actually coming to an end. _

_ I never thought this day would actually happen. _

With a sigh, Laura gathered herself to stand straight and proud, steeled her resolve…

...and put on her mortar board.

Taking one more look over her robes, Laura smiled and went back out into the apartment. “Alright Carm. Bathroom's all yours.”

Carmilla peeked warily from behind the book she was reading. “Yeah, about that… no.”

Laura's face immediately fell into a pout. “Carm, c'mon,” she whined, “you barely have to do anything. We've got your robes and board already. It's not like you need to make yourself look nice”—Laura raked her gaze over Carmilla's supine form—”cause damn!”

Carmilla met Laura's enthusiastic grin with another skeptical gaze. “Bonus points for trying to butter me up, but that's really only the line you want to take when you want me to wear less clothes, not more.”

Laura felt her face heat up before shaking her head, trying to dispel the very pleasant images that sought to distract her. Stamping her foot, Laura pouted and opened her mouth to say something else when their front door flew open, revealing their smiling, redheaded third.

“Hey you two,” Danny greeted, eyes taking in Laura, “wow, babe. You look great.”

“You think so?” said Laura. She couldn’t resist giving a twirl in the middle of the room, smiling giddily.

“I do,” Danny said warmly as she stepped forward, “nearly perfect, you just need to adjust your hood.”

“I do?” Laura asked, looking down at the blue and gold sash marking her journalism discipline, “it looked fine in the mirror. Did my spinning knock it askew? I—” Laura looked up to find Danny now inches away.

“Oops,” said Danny, brushing a loose lock of Laura’s hair behind her ear, “my mistake.” She leaned in, sliding a hand behind Laura’s neck to guide her into a gentle kiss.

“Hey,” whined Carmilla, “feelin’ kinda neglected over here.”

Danny broke the kiss and, keeping her forehead touching Laura’s, turned just enough to give Carmilla a wry look. “Well, maybe if someone was in their graduation robes, they’d be getting some lovin’ too.”

Carmilla’s face darkened into a scowl. Without a word spoken, she brought her book back up, hiding her face behind it.

“Suit yourself,” Danny chuckled, before turning back to Laura “so, the fam is set up. They booked this huge villa just up the highway. The place is pretty darn swanky, I can’t believe that it’s less than half what it’d cost to put up the family even in a cheap hotel. Even better, it backs onto the Silas woods, so the pack can go for a run and play with the Summers a bit.

Laura went bug-eyed. “They got a place on the Silas woods? With the pups? And my very human, not used to supernatural crap, family?”

“I love how you say that as if Gus is defenceless and not carrying enough bear spray to dissolve a steel plate,” said Danny, “besides, it’s warded. You don’t build around here without a few safety measures. Having a mildly malevolent university on one’s doorstep makes for some interesting architectural considerations.”

“Wait… is that why there’s a pentacle inlaid in the floor of our building lobby?”

“Nah, that’s just a weird design choice. The wards will have been inscribed on the support beams.” Danny gestured vaguely around them. “Now, we’re planning on meeting up with everyone at the lodge and we can walk to Hawthorne Hall for the Grad ceremony from there. I can’t wait to see you two finally cross that stage and then we can finally put this place behind us forever.”

“Yeah…” drawled Carmilla, “I’m just gonna sit this one out. Find something more pleasant to do than parade around in front of a slack-jawed audience… like wandering the Library blindfolded maybe.”

“What? Carm, we talked about this,” said Laura, pushing her way onto the couch beside Carmilla, “you said you wanted to do this for some closure. A way to feel like you’ve finally gotten something out of this place.”

“I’ll still get that. I finally finished out a degree instead of running from Mother with my tail between my legs,” said Carmilla, “but I don’t need some ceremony for that. Just have to give ‘em an address and boom, fresh degree, straight to my mailbox.”

“Carrrm,” Laura whined, “c’mon. I don’t want to do this without you.”

“Oh calm down,” said Carmilla, “I’ll still come sit in the audience. I’m sure as hell not gonna miss your big day; I’d just rather not have mine.”

“But—”

“Laura, no,” interrupted Danny, “that’s fair. If you’re not comfortable doing that, we’ll support you. I’m a little disappointed that I won’t get pictures, but I’ve got your back.”

Laura looked like she was about to protest some more before nodding in acceptance. “Alright, you’re right. I can’t say I quite get why, but I don’t need to.” She wrapped an arm around Carmilla, who snuggled into the embrace.

“Thank you,” said Carmilla, visibly relaxing.

“But,” added Laura, “we are bringing your robes with us. We’re taking pictures after the ceremony and I want you there with me, dammit!”

Carmilla chuckled. “Alright, cupcake. Only for you… well, or you Red, but she’s the one with the puppy dog eyes right now.”

“That’s fair,” said Danny.

x-x-x

“Laura! Laura.”

Laura looked up from the program she’d been perusing as she waited in the staging area. Scanning the crowd for the owner of the voice, she finally spotted the young woman waving at her coming out of the crowd.

“Mary!” exclaimed Laura, giving her a hug, “I’ve barely seen you since moving off campus. How’ve you been?”

“I’ve been well,” said Mary, “certainly been easier to sleep some nights.” She winked at Laura who blushed lightly.

“Heh, I suppose that’d be true,” she replied, shaking her head with a rueful smile, “not that you didn’t give as good as you got some nights. How is Rose by the way?”

Mary blushed even harder than Laura had, but laughed anyways. “She’s good. She should be out in the audience right now.”

“Pity she still can’t do the invisible, ghosty, float around thing,” said Laura, “then she could go across the stage with you. She might not be a student, technically, but she should at least get to be part of the ceremony.”

“No argument about that, but as for the ghosty thing, I definitely prefer being able to see and touch my girlfriend.”

Laura laughed. “Very good point.”

“Speaking of deserving to finally cross the stage, where’s Carmilla?” Mary asked.

Laura’s smile went from mirthful to thoughtful. “She’s sitting this one out. She didn’t want to do the ceremony, so she’ll be sitting with our family in the audience.”

“What?” came a stern inquiry from behind Laura. 

Laura knew that voice and didn’t need the slightly terrified face of Mary to tell her who it was. “Governor Belmonde,” said Laura, turning around, “how are you?”

“Gidget, I’m gonna get you to call me Mattie one day, even if it kills you, but that’s not important right now. What was that about Carmilla not getting her degree?”

“Oh, she’s still getting it… just not doing the ceremony.”

“Of course she isn’t. And I suppose she didn’t say why, did she? Just some drivel about not dealing with idiots, right?”

Laura hesitated. “Uh… yeah, pretty much. We didn’t want to press her if she didn’t want to talk about it.”

“Well, that’s nice of you,” said Mattie, “but I made a special trip from Morocco to be here.”

Laura couldn’t help it, she lit up with a goofy smile. “Really? You came all this way for Carm?”

“Yes, yes. Please stop making that face,” said Mattie, “now, if you could tell me where I can find my sister so I can put a stop to this nonsense.”

“Uh… she should be in the lobby with our families,” said Laura, “but you should hurry, they’re supposed to be starting the ceremony soon.”

“Oh darling, I’m  _ running _ the ceremony. It’ll start when I say it starts,” Mattie said before turning on her heel and stalking off.

Laura watched Mattie’s retreating form with the usual mix of adrenaline and annoyance that usually accompanied the elder vampire’s appearance.

“Man, you guys don’t do family members by halves, do you?” said Mary, stepping up beside Laura.

“Eh, you get used to it,” commented Laura, returning to perusing the program.

x-x-x

Carmilla sipped at her wineglass of blood as she stood beside Laf in easy silence. The lobby was buzzing with the quiet din of conversation of a multitude of proud families.

“Unless I miss my guess,” said Laf, getting her attention with a nudge, “someone familiar is trying to get your attention.”

Carmilla followed their direction to the edge of the room and saw Mattie, smiling widely at her, waving uncharacteristically. “Oh my god! What is she doing here?”

“Who is it?” asked Zach, walking up next to them.

“She’s… uh… one of the board governors,” stammered Carmilla.

“And?” said Zach, looking at her expectantly.

“and someone we know,” said Laf, looking at him sternly.

“Okay, okay,” he said, holding his hands up, “I didn’t mean any harm.”

“I know,” Carmilla said, reaching out and giving his hand a squeeze, “she’s safe… to me at least. Try not to let Danny see her; they… don’t get along.”

“That’s one way to put mutually attempted murder,” said Laf.

“I’ll do what I can,” said Zach uneasily.

Making sure that no one else was paying attention to her, Carmilla casually made her way through the crowd towards the corner where Mattie was standing.

“Hey Sis,” said Carmilla, pulling Mattie into a hug, “what are you doing here?”

“I came to see my little sister graduate, but apparently you’re not going to.”

“Well—”

“Oh, don’t give me that ‘oh I still technically get my degree’ line,” said Mattie, staring at Carmilla incredulously, “you’re not gonna take photos and get dinner when you pull it out of the mail box.”

“It’s because of Mother, alright?”

“That pile of dust is dead,” said Mattie, “how could she be involved?”

“Every time I was here, after we were done with the ritual, she would want me to stay to finish whatever degree I had begun; no doubt to keep me under her direct influence that much longer,” said Carmilla bitterly, “but I always ran as soon as she no longer needed me.”

“I remember.” Mattie grinned. “We always had the best mayhems in the years after sacrifices.”

“But…” said Carmilla, “after we stopped Mother, I stayed for Laura and then Danny. To be near them. Playing the part of the student didn’t matter, because it was simply a way to easily stay with them. The degree itself is just a perk of that. But this…” She gestured around them. “This makes it about  _ me _ . It makes it the degree that Mother wanted me to have.”

“Your point?”

Carmilla stared at her sister. “That is the point.”

“Oh, please. Firstly, this isn’t about you,” Mattie said, booping Carmilla on the nose, “at least, not directly. This whole rigmarole is about those who care about you —like the cub scout in the back there, like that group of pups over there… like me— to feel that moment of happiness and pride for you. I doubt Mother would have approved of that.”

“Certainly not,” agreed Carmilla, looking thoughtful.

“Secondly, you’d have a point if she was still alive and generally making the world a dreary place. Without a doubt, she’d hold it over your head, probably would even insinuate that she was the reason you graduated for more leverage over you. She adored games like that.” Mattie smoothly took Carmilla’s glass and took a sip. “Mmm, good vintage. But, she’s dead. She had nothing to do with how you did in your classes, nothing to do with you earning that degree and I honestly think that finishing the job only once she’s not around to gloat over it is probably one of the best insults to her memory that I could think of.”

A smile started creeping its way onto Carmilla’s face. “I never thought of it that way.”

“Of course you hadn’t,” Mattie said with a shake of her head, “thirdly, I flew into the wrong end of nowhere from my beautiful Morocco to keep that blowhard Vordenberg from presiding over your graduation ceremony so the least you can do is cross that stage so I can bestow the one degree I actually care about.

Carmilla’s hand instinctively went to her temple at the mention of the old coot. “Oh god, that would have been interminable, even just as audience. We wouldn’t have been out of here until noon tomorrow… assuming he kept his speeches brief. Alright, you’ve convinced me. Gotta run.” Carmilla quickly turned and crossed the lobby as quickly as she could manage. “Danny! I need my robes!”

Danny looked surprised for a split second before blossoming into a huge smile as she plunged her arm into her messenger bag, tossing the black cloth bundle to Carmilla. “Here you go!”

“Thanks! Wish me luck!”

“Break a leg,” called Danny, before turning back to the group, “well, I wonder what prompted that change of heart.”

“We can only guess,” said Zach, looking at the now vacant spot in the corner.

x-x-x

Laura sat in her seat amongst her fellow journalism grads. In her hands, she clutched onto the embossed black folder holding her newly conferred degree. It had been a somewhat odd feeling to have her degree conferred by Matska Belmonde of all people. She ended up being somewhat surprised to not only receive her degree unmurdered, but that there was what appeared to be a genuine smile on Mattie’s face when she conferred it. It was all quite surreal.

Now, she just had to sit patiently while the rest of the graduates got their degrees, proving difficult; she wanted turn around and look for Danny and Carmilla and their family. Fortunately, they were onto the department of Philosophy, which was the last group. She just had to remain still for a few minutes longer, if only she hadn’t had that second cup of coffee, or maybe it was the sugar from the cookies she ate in the staging area, or maybe—

“Carmilla Karnstein, Magna Cum Laude” the MC announced.

Laura froze. Had they made a mistake? Carmilla wasn’t doing the ceremony. Was she supposed to have told them? Laura’s thoughts swirled until she looked to the head of the stage and saw Carmilla striding forward, smiling, looking amazing in her purple hood and black combat boots poking out from beneath the robe.

She walked up to Mattie, who was sporting the brightest smile that Laura had ever seen on the vampire. They clasped hands warmly before Mattie took the black folder from her assistant and handed it to Carmilla.

She wasn’t close enough to hear but Laura distinctly see Mattie mouth the words ‘Congratulations Kitty Cat’ to Carmilla before tapping her with the ceremonial hat and Carmilla continued the rest of the way across the stage and back into the audience, somewhere behind Laura.

Before long, the last degrees were conferred and Mattie stepped up to the mic. “Traditionally, I’m supposed to make some long winded speech about the future and your place in it here, but I honestly don’t feel like making one and I suspect you’d all rather I just finish up, so I’ll just cut it here. Congratulations darlings. Silas class of 2018.”

With that, a storm of mortar boards leapt into the air.

x-x-x

“Carm!”

Carmilla barely had time to register the voice before Laura barrelled into her with enough force have bowled her over were she not so strong. “Hey, cupcake.”

“You did it! I’m so proud of you,” exclaimed Laura, “I guess Mattie found you then?”

“She did. You told her where I was?”

Laura nodded, smiling.

“I’m surprised. I thought you didn’t trust her.”

“I don’t, except when it comes to you. She’s your sister.”

“Very astute, gidget,” said Mattie as she walked up, “on both counts.” She gave Laura a wicked grin.

“Thank you, Mattie,” said Carmilla, giving her sister a hug.

“Anytime, kitty cat.”

“So…” said Laura, looking uncomfortable, “we were gonna take some photos and then festivities with the Summers and pack for the rest of the day. You’re welcome to come along… it is a family thing after all.”

Mattie gave Laura a surprised smile. “I appreciate the offer, I really do. But I don’t think I’d enjoy myself or be all that welcome, for that matter.”

Laura looked like she wanted to protest that point, but was coming up blank.

“Exactly,” said Mattie, “it’s no matter anyways, I’ve got a flight to catch. Mother’s old apartment is certainly luxurious, but it lacks the elegance of my penthouse in Casablanca; not someplace you want to spend the night, if you can help it.”

“I dunno, the solarium is kinda nice,” said Carmilla, prompting a snicker from Laura.

Mattie rolled her eyes. “I’m sure, darling. Well, I must be off.” She leaned in and kissed Carmilla on each cheek before giving Laura a pat on the head. “Ta darlings. Give my best to Fido and the rest of the pups!”

They watched as Mattie disappeared through a door at the back before they joined hands and walked out to the lobby to meet their waiting family. The first person they encountered was Danny reenacting Laura’s greeting from a few minutes prior.

“I’m so proud of both of you! Also, are you both okay? Did she break any bones?” Danny gently ran her hand along Laura’s arm, looking for injuries.

“So Mattie says hi,” said Carmilla.

“Mattie? The terrifying older sister, Mattie?” asked Gus, “huh, she’s smaller than I expected.”

“Calmer too,” said Zach, “at least when she was in the lobby earlier.”

“You could sense her and didn’t tell me?” said Danny.

“No, of course not. We saw her and Carmilla said not to say anything, so I just kept an eye out as they talked.”

Danny looked like she was about to go into conniptions. “And you just let her? She could have been— Mattie was the one who convinced you to go out, wasn’t she?” asked Danny, looking deadpan at Carmilla.

“Yup,” replied Carmilla, “I generally find arguments in favour of spiting Mother to quite compelling.”

“Huh, I can’t really argue with that,” said Danny, rather impressed, “maybe she and I  _ can _ get along.”

“Alright,” said Gus, “I’ve been waiting four years for these photos, let’s get to it. Where’s a good place?”

“Let’s head for the front gate,” said Paul, “that thing is amazing, should make for a good backdrop.”

“That sounds great,” said Laura, “there is just one photo op before we leave the centre of campus.” She scampered away, leading the rest of the group.

It was only a couple minutes later when they came upon the ruins of the Lustig building, still resting from where they’d settled years before, no-one willing to deal with them properly.

“Here, Laura?” asked Danny, “why of all places, here?

“Well, I figure if we’re leaving Silas behind, this is the best place to give it the parting gesture it deserves.” She said sticking her arm out.

“Y’know, Laura,” said Carm, sticking both arms out, “I have to say, I like the way you’re thinking.”

“Me too,” added Danny, before calling out, “hey Laf! Perry! Get over here. We need the matching set to do this right. Zach, you got the camera?”

“Just say cheese.”

“Cheese!”

That turned out to be their favourite photo of the day, and was displayed for years to come. 

Five friends, middle fingers raised at the rubble that had failed to claim them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone who likes my Silas chapters, this is not an end to them. I just had the idea and wanted to run with it. I really should find a way to get Laura or Danny to run from something, it kinda feels like we pick on poor Carm with these storylines
> 
> Character note: For anyone who has forgotten, Gus is Laura's Dad in this story (assuming the bear spray didn't give it away). He was made long before Sherman debuted, so we opted to stick with the character we're used to. Gus is a lot more easy going than Sherman anyways, so it kinda works out.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed this one!
> 
> -Juniper


	53. Play It By Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marking milestones is important, fun and, at the best of times, a bit messy.

“...Happy Birthday dear Mercy; Happy Birthday to you.”

In her high-chair, the toddler turned her head to and fro, eyes wide at all the people around her in pointy, coloured hats as they beamed at her, gushing over how adorable she was in the little party hat of her own. Where her attention always returned to, however, was the cake on the table in front of her. A single little candle happily flickered away on top of it, fascinating Mercy with its dancing.

“Alright, honey,” cooed Laura, bringing her face right up next to Mercy's, “time to blow out the candle. Can you blow, sweetie?” Laura dramatically puffed her cheeks and gently blew across Mercy's face. 

Mercy smiled and scrunched her face up, giggling at the sensation. A soft chorus of adoring murmurs came from the surrounding family. Laura shared a smile with Carmilla and Danny who were standing on the other side of the high-chair, the former holding little Drix in her arms, the latter holding up the cake where Mercy could feasibly blow out the candle but on guard in case she tried to do something like snack on the flame.. 

“C'mon, honey,” coaxed Laura, blowing another short puff.

Still smiling, Mercy mimicked Laura's movements and while she didn't move a lot of air, she did manage to spray quite a bit of spit back into Laura face. Laura laughed as she wiped off her nose. “Good work! Now, blow out the candle!” She held up finger, pointing at the little flame, miming blowing at it.

Mercy looked from Laura to it and tried blowing again. It was pretty much just a little raspberry that made the flame flicker, but it didn’t go out.

“C’mon Mercy! Try again.”

“Mama,” said Drix, squirming in Carmilla’s arms, “I help.”

“It’s okay, Drix,” said Carmilla, touching him on his nose, “I think Mercy can do it.”

Mercy was staring at the flame intently now as Danny brought it a little closer, watchful in case she got grabby. However, touching it did not seem to be on her mind as breathed in again and blew out with an even greater buzz of noise. Laura added a puff of air out the side of her mouth and the flame vanished into a thin ribbon of smoke. 

Mercy went wide eyed at the glowing wick, as the family cheered around her, looking up at Danny with wonder.

“Happy Birthday, Mercy!” said Danny with an enormous smile, “you’re one year old today.”

“Hadabuh eeeya” babbled Mercy happily, drumming her hands on her tray.

“Yeah, you’re growing up,” replied Danny, fairly certain she got the gist of Mercy’s nonsense speech, “alright, cake time.”

“Cake!!!” came the combined yell of Charlie and Hazel, startling Mercy. In moments, her mood plummeted and she began crying.

“Aww, sweetie,” said Laura, lifting Mercy from the chair, kissing her on the forehead as she gently bounced her daughter in her arms.

“Girls,” scolded Laf, placing a hand on each of their shoulders as they knelt down between the two, “you need to calm down. You scared Mercy.”

Hazel’s face fell contritely while Charlie looked absolutely mortified. Wheeling around, she ran over to where Laura was managing to calm Mercy down.

“I’m sorry, Mercy,” said Charlie, reaching up to try to touch the baby’s feet. When she couldn’t reach, she tugged at Laura’s pant leg. “Mommy, I wanna say sorry.”

Laura smiled down at Charlie, kneeling to bring Mercy down to the three-year-old’s height. “Ok. Gently.”

“I’m sorry, Mercy,” repeated Charlie, leaning forward to kiss her sister. Mercy wiggled a little at the contact, smiling and cooing.

“I think that means ‘it’s alright’, Charlie-bear,” said Laura and Charlie smiled once again, “now, go sit at the table with Hazel and Aaron and we’ll bring you some cake after we cut it, okay?”

“Ok, mommy!” chirped Charlie, grabbing Hazel’s hand and leading her around the table where Aaron was already working on getting himself sat down. Laura and Laf, both still knelt down, shared a smile. It’d been barely two months since Laf and Perry had adopted Hazel and already, she and Charlie were as good as sisters

Smiling after them, Laura stood back up and placed Mercy in her high-chair, straightening out her bib. On the kitchen table, Danny was working on plating up pieces of cake which Perry whisked away to the various party goers around the room. However, no one was digging in yet, aside from the kids who were enthusiastically ploughing through their own pieces. All adult eyes in the room were on Mercy as Danny placed a plate with a small piece of the chocolate cake in front of her.

Mercy simply stared at the confection at first. She’d never been given something like this before, but the smell was enticing. Tentatively, she reached out and dug into the cake with her fingers, pulling a small handful away before mashing it into her face, getting more of it around her mouth than in it.

She chewed slowly before her face lit up with a big smile. “Aaauuaa… vwba,” pronounced Mercy before digging in with her other hand, squeezing at the cake and watching it squish between her fingers.

“Is it good, Mercy?” asked Carmilla from where she was standing behind Drix’s chair.

Mercy seemed to ignore the question as she played with the cake in her hands. Moments later though, she leaned forward, pushing her face into the piece of cake, much to the surprise of the gathering before the room broke into peals of laughter. Even the kids stopped devouring their own cake at the sight, cascading into giggles.

“I think that would be a yes,” said Laf through chuckles.

“Laura?” said Danny.

“Didn’t miss a moment,” said Laura, camera in hand.

“Well whaddaya know, Perr,” drawled Carmilla, “you’re baking gains yet another fan, who’d a thunk it?”

Perry, a hand over her mouth to stifle her own laughter, glanced sidelong at Carmilla, giving her a ‘well, of course’ look. She turned her gaze back to Mercy, who was quickly getting closer to a full fudge and icing masque. Watching the child, her other hand slid over the slight swell of her belly.

“Looking forward to all this?” asked Zach, walking up with Xavier cradled in his arm.

Perry smiled at him. “You have no idea.”

“Oh, I think I might,” he said, bouncing Xavier with a knowing grin.

“Ok, fine. You probably do have some idea,” she said, “we just didn’t get to do this for Hazel, or any of it really. I love her so, so dearly and it hurts to not have these memories. Is that selfish? That feels selfish.”

“Maybe,” said Zach, smile becoming thoughtful, “but that doesn’t make it wrong. You’ll just have to make some memories of your own. Plenty of firsts left.”

Perry mirrored his expression. “Very true. I wonder if it’s too early to teach her to ride a bike.”

“Definitely not,” interjected Paul, “I had both Zach and Danny on training wheels round about her age.”

“But don’t forget a helmet,” added Gus.

“Really, Dad?” asked Laura, “ _ just  _ a helmet? No knee, elbow and shoulder pads?”

Gus looked chagrined before recomposing himself. “Of course, I’m a big enough man to admit that my parenting methods were a little—”

Laura coughed theatrically.

“Alright,  _ really  _ overprotective,” admitted Gus, “in my defence, I didn’t have a nice network of other parents to tell me I was being an idiot.”

“Is it really much of a defence when you admit to being an idiot?” asked Paul.

“I’ll take what I can get,” replied Gus and the two shared a chuckle.

“Well, details aside,” said Laf, inserting themself into the conversation, “I think it’s a lovely idea.” They wrapped an arm around Perry and kissed her on the temple. “I’ll take her bike shopping sometime soon, see if we can find something she likes.”

“Mom?” asked Hazel, tugging at Perry’s pant leg, “can we have some more cake?”

“Not right now, sweetpea. It’s getting late,” said Perry, softly stroking Hazel’s hair, “but tell you what, there’s plenty left, so you can have another piece tomorrow.”

Hazel looked disappointed. “...okay. Can we watch a movie?”

“Of course, why don’t you, Charlie and Aaron go pick one?” said Perry.

“Okay!” said Hazel, scampering off, her friends in tow.

“I’ll go get them set up,” said Elsie, getting up and following after.

“Thanks Els,” said Danny before looking back to Mercy who was now awash in cake and cake-related detritus. She still looked quite happy, but was beginning to yawn. “Oop, looks like it might be time for the birthday girl to make her exit.”

“Yeah,” said Laura, capping the camera, “I think you’re right. If you want I can go clean her up and get her ready for bed while you clean up the high-chair… or frame it. The MOMA pays a mint for stuff like this. Call it a ‘lost Jackson Pollock’”

Danny chuckled. “Sounds good. I’ll be up to help tuck her in in a bit.”

Laura hefted Mercy out of her chair, doing her very best to keep any of the former dessert from taking up residence on her own clothing. Taking her upstairs, she quickly gave Mercy a bath; the toddler alternating between giggling and yawning as fatigue slowly overwhelmed the exhilaration of the party. By the time Laura had her dried off and was tucking her into a sleeper, it was clear from her droopy eyes that she wasn’t going to last much longer.

Laura was just zipping up Mercy when Danny and Carmilla came in the door of the room. Picking Mercy up, Laura held her close and joined her wives at the crib side as they all peppered their daughter with kisses.

“Happy Birthday, Mercy,” said Laura as she lowered Mercy into the crib, “I hope you had fun. We love you.”

“Ghebe av...bah,” babbled Mercy sleepily, “ah… mama.”

All three women froze.

“Did she say what I think she said?” asked Danny.

“C’mon Mercy, say it again,” coaxed Carmilla, “say ‘mama’”

“Rghf… va.. mama,” said Mercy.

“Very good, Mercy,” said Carmilla, reaching in and cupping her cheek, “we’re your mamas.”

“As much as I’d like to keep this up, I think she needs to go to sleep,” said Danny reluctantly.

“Yeah,” admitted Laura, “we can continue this tomorrow. Good night sweetie.”

“Love you, Mercy,” added Carmilla

“Sleep tight,” said Danny, switching on the mobile.

Mercy only stayed awake a few moments more before drifting off. Her mothers remained for a few more minutes, watching her sleep, before finally heading out the door and back down to the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is a milestone I've been looking forward to. Today's chapter marks one year of doing this story (or near as I can get without putting up the chapter two days late ;) ). It's why last week, you got a graduation to mark the last chapter of the full year and now this week, a birthday to mark... well, its birthday.
> 
> Thank you guys for your kudos and comments, they mean the world to me. Also, a huge shout out to jessi_08 for letting me play in her sandbox and the support she's given me. I love this family and it's a privilege to write them.
> 
> As always, hope you enjoyed the chapter.  
> -Juniper


	54. Getting the Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Games are fun in the right time and place.

Drix crouched low in the grass as twilight closed in around him, his quarry just a short distance in front of him. It sat there, motionless but for a slight quiver, hinting that it could dart away at any moment. He tensed, waiting for his prey to make it’s move.

Suddenly, so quickly that he almost missed it, the mark bolted to the left and heading up the trunk of a nearby tree. Not wasting an instant, his powerful hind legs uncoiled and he sprung forward. Within seconds, he was right behind it, scrabbling up the bark after his target, which kept darting towards the upper branches, just tantalizingly out of reach. He pushed off with both hind legs, swallowing a huge vertical distance and nearly closing the gap. Just a little further and the little red dot would be his.

x-x-x

“Charlotte Terry Hollis!”

Charlie snapped off the laser pointer in her hand, instinctively hiding it behind her back. She turned to face Laura as she strode onto the deck. “Yeah, Mom?”

“Were you just teasing your brother with a laser?”

“Uhhhh….”

Laura held out her hand and looked at Charlie expectantly. Under Laura's gaze, Charlie wilted a little and brought her arm out from behind her back, depositing a small, mouse shaped laser pointer into Laura's waiting hand.

Laura stared down at the device, looking even less impressed. “A cat toy? Really?”

“It was cheap,” defended Charlie, “good business ones cost a mint.”

“Yes, because my concern is how much you spent to toy with your sibling.”

“Hey, I wasn't toying with him,” Charlie protested.

“No? Then care to explain what you were—”

“Hey, what gives?” asked Drix as he walked up onto the deck.

“Hi Bud,” said Laura, “I was explaining to your sister how rude it is to toy with your instincts, which I'm sure she wants to apologize for.” She looked at Charlie expectantly.

Much to Laura's surprise, instead of contrition, she was met with a deadpan look, clearly giving away who else had a hand in raising her. Charlie then shifted her gaze to Drix, motioning to their mother. Laura turned to look at Drix to find him staring at her incredulously as well.

“What?” she asked.

“Mom, we were just playing,” said Drix, “that's all.”

Now it was Laura's turn to look contrite. “Playing?”

“Yeah, just the three of us,” said Charlie.

“Three of—?”

Mercy loped out of the woods, a bright yellow softball in her jaws. She trotted up to Drix, dropping the ball at his feet. With a smile he grabbed it, wound up, and pitched it well over the treetops, somewhere towards Grandpa Gus’. With the light tearing sound of claws on turf, Mercy quickly turned and disappeared back into the trees in the same direction.

“Three of us,” Charlie repeated, a smug grin painting her features.

Laura chuckled; she knew when she was beat. “Alright, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed.”

“Well honestly, it's not entirely unwarranted,” admitted Drix, “something about the flickering point of light is really compelling. It  _ would _ be kinda rude if we weren't playing a… game…”

Drix jumped forward, much to Laura's surprise as both of his hands landed on her shoulder. She found herself at a loss for words as she looked down where her was touching her. On top of his hands, was a little red dot. Snapping her head around, she glared at Charlie who simply grinned.

“Did I mention it was buy one, get one?”

Drix looked from the dot, to Charlie and finally to Laura, “ok, now you can chew her out.”

“Oh come on, it's not like you didn't know I had this; you were the one who pointed out the display.”

“I have… no idea… what you’re… talking about,” said Drix, feigning innocence.

“Uh huh… ‘C’mon Charlie! It’d be so much fun to chase it around the treetops.’

“Yeah, and so far we’ve done no tree topping at all. You led me up a tree and then disappeared leaving me nowhere to go but back down.”

“To be fair, that was Mom’s fault.”

“You couldn’t have just said ‘Hi Mom, playin’ with Drix, watch this jump’?”

“Gimme a break, Mom middle-named me. You try keeping up whatever you’re doing when she drops a ‘Hendrix Gus’ in  _ your _ lap.”

Laura rolled her eyes. “Alright, you two, I get it. I’ll leave you to your fun. Just try not to run him into any walls, okay Char?” She reached up and ruffled Drix’s hair, making him chuckle.

“Oh c’mon,” said Charlie with a whine, “a few impacts won’t hurt. I swear I’ll stop before he forgets the alphabet.”

“Alright young lady, but if he comes in later and he can’t pronounce the letter G anymore, we’re gonna have a serious talk,” joked Laura as she turned to go back into the house, “and try not to lose your little sister out there.”

“Ok, Mom!” said Drix cheerily.

“Alright Drix, let’s see how you handle that elm.”

Last thing Laura heard as she stepped inside was the distinct ‘thump’ of a large animal leaping from the deck and hitting the lawn.

Shutting the doorwall behind her, Laura tried to remember what she’d been doing when she’d caught sight of Charlie on the deck. Looking around the kitchen, she sighted her faithful TARDIS mug sitting on the counter, waiting to be filled with more ‘article-editing’ hot chocolate.

She walked into the kitchen and knelt down to get into a cupboard when she realized she was still holding Charlie’s laser pointer in her hand. She stood up, regarding the small plastic device. 

Outside, Charlie seemed to be doing just fine with her back-up; Drix could be seen leaping between the trees on the yard’s edge while Mercy, obviously having returned from her last fetch, ran along the ground below, keeping pace.

“You’re already sick of that new office chair already, huh?”

Laura turned to where Carmilla had walked into the kitchen. “I’m sorry, what?”

Carmilla nodded at the laser pointer. “If you think my threat about those things and your vlogging chairs doesn’t still stand because we’ve had a few kids together, you’re going to get a lesson in deconstructive art.”

Laura paled, remembering the unfortunate results of her early experiments with lasers and her girlfriends back at Silas. It had taken nearly two weeks to get the last bits of desk chair foam out of her sheets and she’d had to make due with a stolen folding chair from the Robespierre building for the rest of the semester.

“Nononononononono…” rambled Laura, “it’s not mine, I’m just holding it… for a daughter…” Laura looked annoyed as she tried to fathom if she had, in fact, just said something that stupid.

“Uh-huh,” said Carmilla, looking more amused than annoyed.

“No, really!” said Laura, pointing at the kids outside. Both Drix and Mercy were now after the little red light as Charlie ran them in circles around the yard.

Carmilla threw her head back and laughed. “Okay cupcake, you’re off the hook.”

Laura breathed a sigh of relief as she put the laser down and set about making her hot chocolate. 

Carmilla wandered over and picked up the toy, examining it as Laura puttered about. “Y’know, that looks pretty fun. They’ve definitely found a better time to use it, than say when a vampire is trying to study.”

Laura rolled her eyes. “Yes, Carm. You made that abundantly clear to both me and my poor second-year back.”

Carmilla smirked. “No vampires are trying to study now.” She tossed the pointer to Laura.

Laura caught the device, staring at it with confusion until she slowly looked up at Carmilla, a smile of comprehension dawning on her face. “I suppose there isn’t.”

x-x-x

Danny pulled her truck into the garage and killed the engine, letting out a relieved sigh at finally being home. It had been a long day and she was looking forward to a relaxing evening just lounging around with the family.

Entering the house, she went through her normal routine of taking off her jacket, kicking off her shoes and dropping her briefcase on the kitchen counter. It was then that she looked up and noticed a small feather floating past her nose.

Curious, she moved over to the living room where many more such feathers filled the air. On one couch, Carmilla lay stretched out, reading a book. She would have looked completely relaxed and nonchalant had the book she was reading not been upside down.

However, if Carmilla was suspicious, Laura was an absolute beacon of guilt. She sat stock straight on another couch, her lips pressed together in an uncomfortable smile. “Oh hi Danny! Have a good day at work? Boy, you look good today, did you get new… eyes?”

Danny just stared at Laura before looking back at Carmilla, whose face was now dropped into the book in defeat. “Alright, so obviously I missed something. Anyone care to explain what happened?” Danny asked, looking around the room, “and explain why half the cushions are missing?”

“Jeez, what happened in here?” said Charlie as the three kids came in from the yard, “it looks like— Mom, you didn’t.”

“Didn’t what?” asked Danny.

“Here’s a hint,” said Charlie, tossing her backup laser to Danny.

Danny flicked the laser on, waving it around experimentally, grabbing both Carmilla and Drix’s attention before Danny snapped it back off again. With a frown Danny looked expectantly at Laura again who hunched her shoulders as she held up the toy’s twin.

Danny pressed her lips together in annoyance before shrugging with resignation. “Well, it was a good chair. May it rest in pieces.” She turned on her heel and headed towards Laura’s office.

“Wait, no. Danny! Not the chair, I just got the setting right!” wailed Laura as she trailed off after her wife.

“Y’know, I can’t help but feel partially responsible.” said Carmilla, picking a feather out of her teeth.

“Agreed,” laughed Charlie.

“Worth it though, right?” asked Drix.

Carmilla grinned. “Totally worth it.”

They all laughed and went to make dinner as a telltale ‘crunch’ echoed from somewhere in the house.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little snippet today. This is loosely inspired by an old Carmilla comic of Laura teasing Carmilla with a laser pointer.
> 
> I hope you all liked it!
> 
> -Juniper


	55. Framed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The work day can drag when it gets too boring... it can also drag when it gets too interesting.

“ _Guten Morgen alle_!”

“ _Guten Morgen Frau Perry._ ”

Perry smiled at the small class as she unpacked her laptop and set about plugging it into the projector connections. Their pronunciation was atrocious, but the third week of German 100 was hardly going to be a place a great fluency.

“I hope you all had a good weekend and are getting settled in. Today, we're going to start off with some basic conversations based off of the assigned readings from last class,” Perry instructed as she put up a slide, “I want you to break into pairs and take turns asking each other questions. Here are some vocab reminders to help you out. We'll stop and move on in about five minutes.”

Her students quickly got to work, practicing their dialogue in stilted murmurs as they muddled their way through the foreign tongue. Slowly, she walked around the room, taking time to pause to help with the occasional wrong word choice or pronunciation. Much to her satisfaction, there was little page flipping; it seemed like everyone had done the reading, though she didn't expect such diligence to continue as their workload increased going further into the semester.

Meandering back to the front of the room, Perry noticed a message on her silenced phone. 

> **_Weirdo <3_ **
> 
> _[Charlie had to run to the museum to deal with_  
>  _a delivery so guess who gets to babysit!]_
> 
>  

Perry smiled warmly, noticing a picture link with the message. Quickly checking that the class was still occupied with the exercise, she tapped the prompt and was greeted with a picture of LaFontaine taking a selfie with their one-year-old grandson, Trystan, hitched on their hip, distracted by something off camera. She took a moment to indulge the flutter of affection before turning the screen off and returning to the lesson.

“Alright, everyone turn to page forty-five,” she said, selecting a file, “we’re going to listen to an _impeccably_ acted scene.” She got a few quiet chuckles. “Answer the questions on the page from what they say in the scene.” Making sure everyone was ready, she hit the play button.

x-x-x

“Alright Alex. _Was macht dir Spaß?”_

_“Fußball spielen macht mir Spaß.”_

_“Schön,”_ Perry praised, “alright, last thing for today is the weekly vocab list.” She clicked the trackpad and the next slide came up. “Copy these down and you’ll be tested on them at the end of the week as usual and since that’s the last thing, you’re free to leave once you're done. _Haben sie einen schönen Tag._ ”

Perry walked back behind the desk as the sound of pencil scratches filled the room, gathering the few books and papers she could. As she slipped her copy of the textbook into the bag, her phone lit up with a new message. 

 

> _[just chillin on the deck]_

 

She touched the picture file to load, looking up at the class. It looked like everyone was about done with a couple people starting to pack up their bags. No one looked like they were coming up for questions yet so she returned her attention to her phone.

 _“Scheiße!”_ Perry yelped, drawing the class’ attention.

“Should we add that to the vocab list for the week?”

Perry’s cheeks turned red as she recomposed herself. “No, that’s not something we formally cover until the advanced class, _Fraulein Morgan_.”

“Fine,” the girl said good-naturedly as she she picked up her bag and headed out, “ _auf wiedersehen.”_

 _“Tchüss!”_ Perry called after her, before returning her attention to her phone. On the screen was a picture of LaFontaine leaning against the railing of their deck while beside them sat Trystan on the railing, completely unsupported. Fighting to remain calm, Perry picked up her phone, trying to think of the politest way to tell her spouse to grow a brain stem.

“ _Frau Perry_? Can I ask you a question?”

“Oh… yes… yes, of course.” Perry put her phone down, directing her attention to the page her student was having trouble with.

Several minutes and a quick _danke_ later, the student was on his way out the door. By now the room was empty and a bustle of students could be seen in the hallway. She picked up the phone again, but one glance at the clock told her that she was behind schedule and she had a faculty meeting to get to. With a huff, she packed up her computer and shoved her phone into her pocket, silently hoping that her grandson would remain in one piece.

Luckily, the meeting room was only a couple of floors up and she managed to avoid arriving last as a few of her fellow profs trickled in from far classes and student questions of their own. As the meeting started, she began jotting down notes on autopilot, not really listening to what was actually being said. She was an old hand at this and she’d be able to review her notes at her leisure later for anything that was actually relevant amongst most of the chaff about ‘student engagement’ and ‘grading rubricks’.

It was about halfway through the meeting when her phone lit up again. Her stomach clenched as she began to worry her lip, concerned about what may be waiting for her. She glanced around to gauge if she could risk taking a glance, though it seemed she didn’t have to be concerned; three of her colleagues completely immersed in their own text conversations answered the question pretty handily. Keeping up her notes, she quickly swiped at her upturned phone with her off hand. 

 

> _[Making Lunch. Trystan’s helping!]_

 

Perry’s eyes widened in dread. Steeling herself, she downloaded the picture to see Trystan sitting on the counter, holding her good chef’s knife, beside the stove as LaFontaine cooked with a _very_ active flame.

“No!” yelped Perry in complete shock.

“Excuse me, Lola,” said Professor Kramer, the department head, “did you have a problem with our proposed class rotation for next semester?”

Perry reddened, she hadn’t meant to say that out loud. “Well, I…” Perry stalled, looking at the notes she’d made, comparing them to the projector screen. She went wide eyed, somewhat grateful to Laf for their lucky timing, “yes, yes I do. This schedule is missing Portgugese 307 and Mandarin 424, both degree requirements to their programs. We’d be better off cutting Liguistics 315 —it’s elective— and then reducing German 244 to two classes. Our three classes of 243 are under-enrolled, so we can afford to merge.”

Kramer glanced over his own notes, looking to his deputy department head. “What do you think, Mike?”

Mike flipped pages back and forth, looking quite discomfitted. Obviously, the new schedule had been his project. After another minute of comparisons, he nodded reluctantly. “She’s right, but her changes would free up the resources to run them. It’ll be a bit tighter than we were hoping for, but it’s sound.”

Kramer nodded affirmitavely. “Good. See if you can find any other ways to trim down but this’ll give us something to submit. Good catch, Lola. The Dean would have been breathing down our necks.”

“Thank you,” she said with a bright smile.

“Alright, next on the agenda, the new edition of the second-year spanish textbook.”

Perry let out a sigh and returned to her notes, eyeing her phone with worry.

x-x-x

It was mid-afternoon when Perry dragged herself into the ESL computer lab. After the meeting, she’d been pulled aside by Mike. She’d been expecting a chewing out for undermining his hard thought out class schedule. What she got however was a heap of gratitude for catching his error and a request to join him for a working lunch to workshop a better rotation.

Her concern over her spouse’s antics and a pressing desire to check-in made her reluctant to agree, but she was forced to admit that her eye for detail would make her an invaluable assistant in such a project. The fact that he was offering to pick up the tab for a lunch at the campus pub, rather than her usual hopeless quest to find something interesting in the faculty cafeteria, certainly didn’t hurt in convincing her either. Over the next two hours, the two worked highly successfully over plates of fries and nachos until Perry had to beg off to get to her last class of the day in time.

Taking a seat at the desk at a raised spot in the corner where she could observe the room, she watched as international students of varying stripes came in and settled in on various lab computers, starting in on their individual lab assignments. Once everyone was settled in and Perry was satisfied that no one needed any immediate help, Perry hazarded a glance at her phone. There was one message waiting that had come in sometime during lunch. 

 

> _[Taking care of some yard work]_

 

Perry bit her lip, terrified at what was in store. With a tap, the image opened and she was greeted with the less terrifying, but still somewhat worrying image of Trystan driving the riding mower.

She didn’t get the chance to let the image sink in however as another text appeared on the screen. 

 

> _[Grandma Carm came by to play!]_

 

A wave of relief passed through Perry’s body. No one was more protective of the grandkids than Carmilla. She could count on the vampire to keep any more of these shenanigans from happening. Expecting something a little more conventional, Perry opened the image, which promptly shattered her expectations.

The image was taken from a distance. In the middle of the yard stood Carmilla, her arms outstretched towards the sky. Far above, at least a couple storeys up in mid-flight, was Trystan, arms outstretched and a bright smile on his face. Perry gaped, completely flabbergasted. Superspeed or not, she couldn’t believe Carmilla would take that kind of risk.

She was so caught up in the image that she didn’t notice a student a student trying to get her attention until they walked up to her.

“Excuse me,” asked a girl with a scandinavian accent, startling Perry out of her reverie, “can you help me with order of words?”

“Oh! Yes. I’m sorry, Dagny,” said Perry, walking back to the girl’s terminal with her, “I let myself get distracted.”

“It is okay,” said Dagny, “was good picture. Good photoshop.”

Perry blinked. “What?”

“Is that not correct word?” asked Dagny, “you make picture with other pictures. Photoshop, yes?”

“Oh, yes. Of course,” said Perry with a smile to cover her embarrassment as she began to help Dagny with her assignment.

Of course the photos had been fakes. She wasn’t sure whether to feel guilty that she thought that Laf would actually put Trystan in that much danger or angry that they scared her like that. However, what really concerned her was how they managed so many photos so fast. Laf could put together a rough cut in maybe a day or so, but they spent too much time on their lab work to really hone those sorts of skills. The only way they could send so many is if they had…

Perry quickly formed a hypothesis as she finished up with the Icelander. After a quick walk around to check on the rest of her charges, she made her way back up to her desk and picked up her phone, starting a new conversation.

x-x-x

“Okay, okay, okay,” said Carmilla mirthfully as she gently bounced Trystan on her knee, “we go for the old William Tell. An apple, an arrow, a tree; it’s a classic.”

“Ha, not bad,” cackled Laf, “but we don’t have a bow and arrow.”

“We have steak knives.”

“I like the way you think, I’ll go get an apple.”

“Is she actually getting these? You haven’t heard from her all day,” asked Carmilla before turning Trystan around and making funny faces at him, eliciting a giggle.

“Yup, I’ve been getting the read receipts,” said Laf, tossing an apple in one hand, “she’s probably just having a busy day. Hopefully, she’s finding these as funny as we are and it’s helping the day pass quicker.”

“You’re assuming she knows they’re fake,” said Carmilla as her phone buzzed. She pulled Trystan close with one arm as picked up her phone with the other.

“She knows that I wouldn’t do things this stupid with our grandkid,” said Laf, “with myself? Sure, but not this little guy.”

“You sure about that?” said Carmilla, going notably wide-eyed at her phone.

“Uh, why?” asked Laf as their own phone buzzed. Meeting Carmilla’s concerned gaze, they opened the waiting message. 

 

> **_Perr of hearts_ **
> 
> _[Well, that was amusing set of photos.]_
> 
> _[It inspired me to make a few of my own…]_

 

LaFontaine did not like that ellipsis as a set of pictures appeared for download. One by one, they touched the screen, bringing the pictures into existence. The first made Carmilla’s reaction clear; a picture of Perry’s hand holding a burning copy of her brownie recipe. It didn’t concern Laf all that much, they knew she had that recipe memorized forwards, backwards and inside-out; though it didn’t bode well for the rest of the pictures.

The next picture was just a pair or scissors which confused Laf until they saw the next picture and they paled. Perry’s hand held a fist full of bright red, long, curly hair which was then shown in a garbage bin in the final frame. 

 

> _[see you at home <3] _

 

“I think I might have screwed up…” said Laf.

“Yeah, I think we did,” said Carmilla, cuddling Trystan who seemed to pick up the mood shift and began whining a little in Carmilla's arms.

“Luckily,” came a voice from the doorway, “you can’t always believe everything you see.”

The two turned at the voice, seeing a smug looking Perry, her long red tresses let loose to fall over her shoulders and back.

“Perry!” exclaimed Laf, scampering across the room to wrap her in a hug, nuzzling into the cascade of curls.

Perry indulged them for a moment, before gently extracting herself. “Alright, I’m still annoyed with you. Let me hold my grandson who I’ve been worried sick about all day.” She swept across the room and accepted Trystan from Carmilla’s outstretched arms as Laf stood where she’d left them, trying to put two and two together.

“Wait, so if you faked the photos, how’d you do that so fast?”

“Simple my dear,” said Perry, hitching Trystan on her hip as she pulled out her own phone, “you should know that just because you commision an artist, doesn’t mean they won’t pick up another project. Thank you for your assistance, JP.”

“Of course, Miss Perry,” came JP’s voice from Perry’s phone, “I apologize for any distress I may have caused.”

“You’re already forgiven, sweetie. Thank you for your quick work.”

“Of course, Miss Perry.”

“I’m sorry too, Perr,” said Laf, resting their chin on her shoulder, “I thought you’d find it funny.”

“In hindsight, I suppose it was amusing,” she said, “just next time, maybe let me know? JP is very good at his craft.”

“That he is,” agreed Laf, before heading for the kitchen, “well, why don’t I whip up that chicken stew you like for dinner. It’s the least I can do to make it up for you.”

“That sounds lovely,” agreed Perry, “especially after a long day. First however, you two sounded like you had an interesting idea before I came in.”

Laf looked at Perry with confusion before a look of realization appeared on their face as they and Carmilla shared a look of excitement.

“Hey Jeep? You up for one more.”

x-x-x

Charlie grabbed her coat from the corner of her shared office as she got ready to go home at last.

“Finally getting loose, Hollis?” asked Rob from where he was kicked back at his own desk.

“Yeah. If I have to log one more urn in, my eyes are going to fall out. I just want to get home to my son and Wife.”

“How is the little guy doing?”

“Very well. He spent the day with his Buba,” she said as her phone chirped. She picked it up and looked at the screen, going slack jawed, “and learning new skills apparently.”

On the screen was a picture of Laf standing with an apple in their mouth and a knife in the apple while in the foreground, Perry seemed to be instructing Trystan in proper throwing knife technique.

“This explains so much about you,” said Rob.

“What can I say?” said Charlie, “they know how to make his Mama proud.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look, a Perry chapter! I've been wanting to do a chapter focused on her without having her baking or cleaning so I could give her a little more dimension. The pictures were inspired by/shamelessly lifted from the tumblr photoset "giving grandma a heart attack". If you haven't seen it, go check it out, it is hilarious.
> 
> As always, I hope you all liked this chapter and I'd love to hear what you think.
> 
> Cheers!  
> -Juniper


	56. Mass Hysteria

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A pair of dogs get a cat.

It was a beautiful morning as Mercy slowly came to wakefulness. Beyond the loosely drawn shades, the sun soaked boughs of the adjacent trees could be seen swaying in the breeze, the gentle sound of the blowing leaves lulling Mercy to fall back to sleep. Still half asleep, she revelled in the feeling of Sky pressed up against her back. Giving a quick scratch to the cat wedged under her free arm, Mercy started to drift back off to sleep.

_ Wait… _

Mercy began to wake back up as she looked down at the small orange tabby who was comfortably stretched out in front of her. “Sky…” she said.

“Mmmmf,” came the still asleep moan from behind her.

“Baby?”

“Nnng… yeah?” replied a very groggy Sky.

“Did we get a cat?

“No, why?” asked Sky, looking over Mercy’s shoulder and spotting the feline on the bedspread, “we don’t own a cat…”

“and yet…”

“Is she… he… it? wearing a collar? A license?”

Mercy stroked the cat, eliciting a purr. “No, nothing and it’s a he, I think. Feels like a he.”

“Feels like a he?”

“The way he sits is a bit like Drix.”

“Eh, good enough for me. What should we do about him?”

“I dunno. We’ll figure it out. Let’s get up, make some coffee and get some food into us… and probably into him as well.”

Edging out from under the sheets so as not to throw their unexpected guest to the floor, they sleepily shuffled out of their bedroom.

“Well, I think I know how he got in,” said Sky, nodding towards their open screen door.

“We're on the fourth floor,” said Mercy, “how'd he get up here?”

“The building is surrounded by trees” noted Sky, “you of all people should know how easily a cat can get to high places.”

Mercy chuckled. “I guess I’m just accustomed to them going back down… or getting stuck and having to wait for Mama to get home.”

“Well, that solves the first mystery at least, now we have to see if we can find his owner… but first…” added Sky, scampering off to the bathroom.

Mercy laughed as she headed into the kitchen to start brewing the life-giving elixir that was their morning coffee. She got as far as loading the grounds into the filter basket when she felt something warm and fuzzy rub against her legs.

“Well hello little one,” she said down to the tabby, who was staring right back up at her, side affixed to her shin. She reached down to pet him as he pushed himself up into her hand.

“We got anything we can feed him?” asked Sky, going for the pantry.

“There’s a can of tuna in there,” said Mercy, chucking him under the chin as his eyes closed in contentment.

“Isn’t canned tuna bad for cats?” asked Sky.

“It can be, if they have too much,” said Mercy, “but a little from time to time is fine. Mom looked it up when they used to give it to me and Drix as a treat… though I never liked it as much as him for some reason.”

“How much, do you think?”

“Oh, he liked it alot!”

“I mean, how much should we feed him? You yutz.”

“Quarter can should be enough,” mused Mercy, “he’s a little one so it should tide him over til we can find his owner… or buy some proper food, whichever comes first.” Mercy shrugged as she stood back up and got the coffee started, the cat running over to Sky at the sound of a can opener.

“Well, he’s definitely someone’s,” said Sky, smirking as he began meowing plaintively, “he’s used to home noises.”

“But whose?” Mercy remarked with a frown, “you think the building manager might know?”

“It’s a good bet, pets have to be registered,” said Sky as she put down the plate, the tabby falling on it ravenously. She watched the cat silently for a moment before running to their room. A minute later, she returned dressed and with her phone in hand, snapping a picture of the cat as it ate, “I’ll go ask her if you wanna get breakfast started.”

“What do you mean ‘started’?” said Mercy, gesturing to the filling coffee pot, “it’s nearly done.”

“Merc…”

“I’m kidding. Go find out who our lost kitty belongs to, I’ll whip up some pancakes.”

x-x-x

“Why hello, dear.”

Sky looked up at her elderly neighbour as she exited the elevator out onto her floor. “Oh, good morning, Heather.”

“How are you on this lovely morning?”

“Pretty good,” said Sky, “just trying to solve a bit of a mystery.”

“Ooh, I love mysteries. I can lose an entire afternoon to Agatha Christie,” said Heather, “what are you trying to figure out?”

Sky pulled out her phone, showing Heather the photo she’d snapped earlier. “Trying to find out who this little guy belongs to. He snuck into our apartment earlier this morning. The manager didn’t have him registered to anybody.”

Heather’s expression became sad. “No, she wouldn’t. I’ve been seeing him around the neighbourhood for the past few months, after winter thank heavens, but I think this poor fellow is homeless.”

“He’s obviously used to people,” Sky mused aloud, “I wonder if he’s lost”

Heather looked thoughtful for a moment. “Or abandoned.”

“I hate to think of the kinds of people who’d abandon such a sweet little cat.”

“Me too, dear,” agreed Heather, “but it happens, sadly.”

Sky frowned, but nodded in agreement. “I hope that’s not the case here. We’ll put up some posters, ask the humane society.”

“It’s a good place to start as any, dear.”

“Thanks, Heather”

“Good luck. And say hello to that girlfriend of yours for me.”

“Will do.”

Sky left the older woman with a wave, making her way back to her apartment.

“Welcome back!” greeted Mercy, “first pancakes are just about done. Any luck?”

“Kinda, Heather says hi by the way,” said Sky. Mercy’s grin broadened at the mention of their neighbour, “but let me put it this way. Time for a trip to the pet store.”

x-x-x

“I’d say he seems about a year old, give or take a few months,” said Dr. Harvey as the vet gently prodded the less than happy cat, “he’s healthy. He’s a good weight and his coat is full and clean. How long have you had him for?”

“About three weeks,” replied Mercy, “we’ve been taking care of him while we try to find his owner.”

“And no luck I imagine.”

“No. No responses to the lost cat posters and the humane society hasn’t had anyone looking or any records for him.”

Dr. Harvey nodded sadly as she switched to simply stroking the cat, which he much preferred to her previous ministrations. “That doesn’t surprise me. He’s not chipped or tattooed, he’s not neutered and I’d bet he’s not vaccinated either. Probably a christmas kitten that got too big.”

Sky’s expression darkened, thinking back to her conversation with Heather. “Some people…”

“Yes. But then you have some other people who take in a lost cat without a second thought,” she said, smiling at the couple whose moods uplifted at the praise, “I think that at this point you need to decide whether to give him to a shelter who can find him a home… or become that home yourselves.”

Mercy and Sky looked at each other. They didn’t need a single word to know how the other felt.

Mercy turned to Dr. Harvey. “How soon can you get him in to get everything done?”

x-x-x

“Well, I have to say, I very much approve of your new pet,” remarked Drix as he sat on the floor and fed the tabby kibbles one by one, helping the cat eat while the protective cone made it difficult to do so by himself, “even if he chose you more than the other way around.”

“I actually think that makes it even better,” said Mercy from where she was perched on the counter, surreptitiously filming Drix with her phone, “he  _ wants _ to be with us.”

“Well, I never claimed he was smart.”

“You are so lucky you’re holding him right now or you’d be dodging garlic, bucko.”

“But I am and he’s still hungry, so hush,” he said, holding another piece out between his fingers.

Mercy huffed at him, but couldn’t maintain her frown long before breaking into giggles.

“So have you guys decided what to call him?” asked Charlie from where she was leaned up against the fridge.

“We think so,” said Mercy, “given how he came into our lives, we wanted to give him a climbing name.”

“Of course,” said Charlie matter-of-factly.

“Sky suggested Edmund, for Edmund Hillary,” said Mercy to simultaneous looks of horror from her siblings, “yeah, I didn’t think it was a very cunning plan either.” 

“So you were nice enough to spare him that name,” said Drix, scratching the cat out of sympathy, “but what did you decide on?”

“Tenzing, the name of Hillary’s guide,” said Mercy, “or just Tenz for short.”

“Tenz, I like it,” said Charlie, slowly gaining a smirk, “you could almost say it’s  _ perfect _ .”

“Sorry, I suddenly hate the name,” said Drix, glaring at Charlie.

“Well, too bad,” said Mercy with a chuckle, “Sky and I both love it, so it’s here to stay.”

Drix shook his head with a good-natured smile and returned his attention to the hungry Tenz in his lap.

x-x-x

“Mercy, are you sure you want to do this?” asked Sky, cuddling Tenzing as he nuzzled up under her chin. Mercy was busy in front of them, setting up a baby-gate across the door to their bedroom.

“Yeah. He should know us like this,” said Mercy, “and besides, I miss being able to lounge around the apartment.”

“Well, if you’re sure…” Sky said reluctantly.

“Well, I’m not really…” Mercy admitted, “hence the baby-gate.”

“Where’d you get this anyways?”

“Went and borrowed it from Moms,” said Mercy, “they were awfully disappointed when I told them what I needed it for, though.”

Sky laughed. “Engagement first, then marriage,  _ then _ babies. They’ll have to make do with their grand-cat for now.”

“My dear Sky, are you proposing to me?” Mercy batted her eyelashes coquettishly.

“Please, like I’d do that now. If I propose, it won’t be in my pyjamas and I’d probably enlist my entire dance troupe to help.”

“Sounds lovely,” said Mercy, filing the idea away for herself before stepping over the gate, “now, let’s give this a try. If we’re planning such a future with him, he’s definitely gonna have to get used to it.”

“Alright,” said Sky, sitting down on the other side of the gate, placing Tenzing into her lap.

“Tenz!” called Mercy, “pss, pss.” Tenzing turned to the gate, making eye contact with his owner on the other side.

Satisfied she had his attention, at least for the moment, Mercy took a deep breath and shifted leaving a large wolf staring at Tenzing through the gate. Mercy pressed herself against the floor, trying to look as submissive as possible. Tenzing puffed up almost immediately, arching his back and pressing back against Sky away from the new predator.

“It’s alright,” said Sky gently, stroking him reassuringly, “it’s alright. That’s Mercy. You’re safe.”

For several minutes, he remained pressed against Sky as she cooed soothingly at him, trying to keep him from bolting. As she kept talking, however, he began to relax. His fur slowly returned to normal and the tension gradually left his body until he was simply sitting in Sky’s lap, cautiously watching the canine.

Mercy, for her part, remained still, hoping Tenz would recognize, or at the very least, accept her. It wasn’t until she noticed him sniffing the air curiously that she became hopeful. Slowly, he stepped forward, out of Sky’s grasp and towards the gate. Mercy hardly dared move a muscle, lest she startle him. He eventually walked right up to the gate, his nose twitching furiously.

Suddenly, he gathered himself and with one smooth jump, he leapt over the gate, landing right beside Mercy’s snout. Cautiously, she lifted her head so she was nose to nose with him as he continued his investigation. Eventually, he stopped sniffing and simply sat back looking at her for a long moment. Mercy broke eye contact to glance up at Sky, who’s face looked quite hopeful. It was then that Tenz stepped forward, rubbing his face across the underside of her jaw and pushing himself up against her chest.

Mercy was overcome with joy. Without thinking about it, she bent her head to give him a lick to which he swatted her muzzle away.

“I guess he doesn’t like dog slobber,” said Sky with a laugh.

Mercy glared at her as she shifted back, picking up Tenz and scratching him as he continued to rub his face on her. “Laugh it up, babe, cause it’s your turn now.”

“Alright, one slobber free wolf, coming up,” said Sky as she shifted and they started to process all over again.

x-x-x

Laura knocked on the door as she, Danny and Carmilla let themselves into Sky and Mercy’s apartment carrying plastic containers of food. Somewhere nearby, the flowing melody of a piano could be heard.

“Hello?” she called softly before spotting a sight on the couch that melted her heart. Flopped across the cushions was Sky in her wolf, her front paw hanging off the side while up on her back, curled up into a small orange ball, was Tenzing.

Putting up a finger to her lips, Laura pointed towards Mercy’s office and handed off her containers to Danny who smiled at her with a nod before heading towards the kitchen.

Walking as quietly as possible, Laura headed to the office door and slipped in, waiting for Mercy’s to finish her tune.

“Hey there, we’re early,” whispered Laura.

Mercy cocked her head. “Why are you whispering?”

“Sky’s taking a nap with Tenz.”

“Pfff, she could sleep through a jumbo jet landing on the coffee table and even if you wake Tenzing, he’ll take two steps, lick his butt and fall right back to sleep.”

“Oh. That must be nice for practicing, you don’t really have to keep it d—”

A cacophony of hisses, yowls and yips cut Laura off as an orange blur flew into the room ending in a puffball pressed up against Mercy’s leg.

“That, on the other hand, may have woken her up,” said Mercy, cautiously lifting Tenz up off the floor, petting him gently as they walked back out to the living room.

In the middle of the room, Carmilla’s panther stood with a paw on her nose as Danny was visibly trying to contain her laughter. On the couch, Sky sat as a human again, looking rather irritated with Carmilla.

“What happened?” asked Laura.

“Well, Ms. I-am-the-night decided to try to introduce herself to Tenzing, cat to cat,” said Danny with a guffaw, “Tenz was not quite so enthusiastic and instead introduced his claws to her nose.”

“Yeeeah,” said Mercy, “we only just got him used to wolves. I don’t think he was ready for a panther yet.”

“Clearly,” said Carmilla as she stood up, red scratches on her nose quickly disappearing.

“Serves you right,” groused Sky, “worst, wake-up, ever.”

“It should have been easy. I’m a cat. He’s a cat. We’re practically family.”

“Excuse you,” said Mercy, “he  _ is _ family.

“See?!”

“However,” Mercy added, “when was the last time you saw two strange cats get along from the get go?”

Carmilla visibly deflated as Danny had to stifle another round of laughter.

“We’ll help you with it later,” said Sky, “for now, let him get used to your scent —same goes for you Aunt Danny— then we can introduce  _ you _ .”

Mercy walked over, gently handing off a calmed Tenz to Carmilla. He preened under attentions for a few moments before pulling himself loose and walking off to his water dish.

“This would be so much easier with babies,” complained Carmilla.

“One day, Mama. One day.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is based on something very similar happening to me. Woke up one morning to find a small, black cat just outside my door, which I almost didn't notice due to my roommate's cat only just having moved out. It wasn't until I went to step over her that I realized "I don't currently live with a cat" before I began to go through the motions to find the owner. Luckily, she was my neighbour's and had just jumped the balcony divider and pawed open my screen door to get in. Still, interesting morning. 
> 
> I hope you all like this one!
> 
> -Juniper


	57. Grating Expectations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Knowledge is power.

“Oh my gosh! Perr?”

Perry looked up from the book she had laid across her lap to where LaFontaine was standing in front of her, holding the next book in the pile. The look of sheer joy on their face was unmistakable.

“Does this mean what I think it means?”

Perry smiled sadly, placing her book aside so she could stand up. “Oh, I'm sorry, Love,” she said, cuddling into their side, “no bun in this oven, not that it could really happen all that spontaneously anyways.”

Laf snorted. “I suppose that would be a little unusual. I guess I was hoping you were surprising me.”

“Without letting you fully vet which fertility specialist we go with?” Perry asked, smirking at the way their eyes lit up, “what kind of wife do you take me for?”

Laf leaned in, peppering Perry's jaw with nibbles and kisses as they spoke. “I… apparently… gave you… far too… little credit…”

“Mmmm…” purred Perry, tilting her head to give them better access as she started tracing circles on their hip “I think I can find it in my heart to forgive you.”

“Well, perhaps it'll help if I'm a little more… spontaneous.” They slipped a hand up under her shirt as she dragged them back down into the couch.

x-x-x

“Okay… how 'bout now?”

Perry giggled. “As much as I agree that should have counted,” she said, still somewhat in a haze of endorphins, “I still think we're missing something.”

“Y'know, that fine,” they said, absently trailing their fingers over her bare shoulders, “this way I still get to have fun inspecting fertility labs. Though I think further experimentation has merit.”

“Sounds like something I'd be willing to help with.”

“What? The inspection or the experimentation?” they asked with a salacious grin.

“Both, of course, silly,” she said as she disentangled herself from them, getting up to retrieve her scattered clothes, “though I think I’m more qualified for the latter than the former.”

“Boy are you ever,” sighed Laf, “I don’t know if I can walk.”

Perry grinned smugly at the compliment. “Well, you’ll need to recover quick. We’re expected for dinner at six.”

“Oh, okay,” they said as Perry tossed them their boxers, “isn’t that a bit late though? L and Dan’ should have gotten home at five. We should go help them cook.”

“Love,” said Perry, raising an eyebrow at them, “they just got home. I really don’t think they’re cooking right now.”

Laf glanced around the room at their own scattered clothes. “Right, they’re newlyweds too.”

“Expecting newlyweds,” said Perry, “they’re kinda high on emotions right now.”

“Ooh, yeah. Y’know, I probably have time then to make a nice potato salad.” They leveraged themself off the couch, moving around the room, pulling on their clothes, “they won’t mind us being a little late.”

“That sounds like a lovely idea. I’ll start boiling some eggs,” said Perry.

“Nah, go back to your reading, Love,” said Laf, “I can handle things.”

“Alright, it’ll be nice to know a little more before I see Laura.”

“Oh, of course. That’s nice that you want to help out like that.”

“It seemed the right thing to do, though I still hope to use all this for us someday, sooner rather than later hopefully.”

“Me too, Love. Me too.”

x-x-x

“Hello!” called Perry as she walked in the front door. The hiss of water flowing through pipes could be heard somewhere through the walls but there was no other sign of life in the house as the couple made their way into the kitchen.

“Guys?” Laf hollered towards the stairs.

The hiss of water cut off with a squeak and there was a clamber from upstairs. Moments later Danny appeared at the bottom of the stairs, covering herself with a towel.

“Hey…” she said, red in the face and catching her breath, “you’re early.”

“Uh, actually dude,” said Laf, looking over to the clock on the wall, “we’re actually pretty late.”

Danny took one glance and her eyes just about bugged out of her head. “Oh jeez! Sorry, give us a few minutes and we’ll be right down.”

“Take your time,” singsonged Perry as she got stuff out onto the counter. 

Danny disappeared back up the stairs as Laf went to assist Perry. She held up a finger, pausing them for a moment as she turned to look at the stairs. A moment later, Laura’s embarrassed squawk could be heard and another racket of activity could be heard from above. Both Perry and Lafontaine chuckled, sharing a low-five.

Before long a dishevelled and blushing Laura and Danny and an equally disheveled but more nonchalant Carmilla came down the stairs into the kitchen. 

“Guys, I’m so sorry,” apologized Laura, “we totally lost track of time.”

“Frosh, chill,” said Laf, “we get it. Perr and I just get off earlier so we… got off.... earlier.” 

Carmilla and Danny broke out laughing while Laura just stood there with a look of shock.

“Lafontaine!” scolded Perry. She lightly swatted them on the arm but couldn’t keep the amused grin off of her face.

“Ok, it’s official,” said Carmilla, making a beeline for the fridge, “this calls for a toast!” She pulled out a bottle of champagne and began pulling down champagne flutes from the cupboard.

“Oh, uh, Carmilla,” stuttered Perry, “I think you only need four glasses.”

“What, wh— oh.” Carmilla’s face fell as she looked over at Laura, glancing knowingly at her still-flat stomach.

“I guess that’s something I’m gonna have to get used to for a while,” said Laura with a resigned shrug, “I guess you guys will have the toast without me.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Danny, striding to the fridge, “we’ve got this.” She stuck her head into the fridge and began rummaging around.

“Thanks Perry,” said Laura, “I would’ve remembered after I drank it and then been up all night worried sick.”

“Well, it wouldn’t have been too bad,” said Perry, pulling a book out of her bag, flipping to a page, “an accidental drink generally won’t harm a fetus, though the author still recommends avoiding drinking deliberately.”

“Huh, good to know,” said Laura, “though I’m still glad you noticed before I drank.”

“Me too, sweetie.”

“Aha!” announced Danny, raising her hand out from behind the door holding a green can, “ginger ale.” She popped open the can, filling the empty flute with the pale soft drink.

“Thanks Danny,” said Laura, picking up the glass and raising it, “to living life!”

Everyone else raised their glasses.

“And to new life,” added Perry, nodding to Laura.

“Hear hear,” said Carmilla as they all clinked their glasses.

“Alright, it’s pretty late and I’m hungry,” declared Laura, “and since I’m eating for two, I’d say this is doubly important. Let’s get these birds on the grill!”

“On it,” said Danny, “what’s everyone want? jerk? cajun? or just classic barbeque sauce?”

“I vote for barbeque sauce,” said Laura, “I’m in the mood for something sweet.”

“L, you’re always in the mood for something sweet,” observed Laf.

“So? I’m consistent.”

“Alright, that’s one vote for barbeque,” counted Danny.

“Two votes,” interjected Carmilla.

“You want barbeque? alright,” said Danny, counting on her fingers.

“No. I want jerk—”

“How fitting,” cackled Laf.

Carmilla flipped them off and continued, “I mean, Laura’s vote counts twice since the baby gets a vote too.”

“Alright, two for barbeque, two for jerk since I’m in the mood, Laf?”

“Cajun.”

“So helpful,” jeered Danny, “alright Perr, it’s down to you. You have the deciding vote… or deadlocking vote, so y’know… no pressure.”

“Actually, I don’t think we should be using the grill.”

“...what?”

“Well, it’s just…” she picked the book up again, flipping to a different page, “the chemicals in smoke and char are bad for developing babies… bad for us for that matter, but we’re quite a bit bigger than your typical fetus.”

“Wait…  _ typical _ fetus?!” inquired Danny.

“Best you don’t ask,” said Laf, “neither I nor Perr want to relive that particular visit to the Silas deep bio labs.”

“Alright keeping to myself,” said Danny, holding up her hands.

“So wait… no barbeque?” Laura made a face like a kicked puppy, “No burgers? No ribs? No steaks?”

“Oh sweetie, you can still have those things… in moderation.”

—Laura made a face at the ‘M’ word—

“You just really shouldn’t have them grilled. We can cook them other ways that’ll still be tasty. Here, I know a simple recipe for barbeque glazed chicken. It’ll still be nice and sweet, you’ll just have to make due without that smoke flavour for a few months.” Perry quickly moved to where the chicken sat on the counter and began prepping it.

“Well, if you’re sure… I suppose I can hold off for the sake of the baby.”

“That’s good, sweetie,” said Perry, as she began mixing tomato sauce and brown sugar in a pot, “it’s for the best.”

Laura smiled politely at her friend, but Danny and Carmilla shared a concerned look.

x-x-x

“Wow, Perry,” said Danny, “sorry I doubted you. That was incredible.” Danny felt full to bursting, she’d eaten so much. It was hard to resist the temptation to undo her belt and pants to relieve the pressure.

“Well, I’m glad you liked it. I realize that I kind of railroaded you and took over your dinner,” said Perry, “I’m so sorry about that.”

“If being railroaded gets us dinners like that,” said Carmilla, “I say tie me to the tracks and start the old timey piano music.”

“Wow Perry, with recipes like that, I should be able to weather eight months without a grill just fine.”

“I have plenty,” said Perry, “including a rib recipe that will probably make you never want to grill them again.

Danny scoffed but Laura looked excited as she popped up from her seat. “Can't wait to try it. Now, let's get things cleaned up, at least as fast as we can manage. I'm so full, I feel like I might have a baby bump already.” Laura lifted her shirt to check, but there was no sign of anything yet. She looked up at the table, making a show of pouting at the lack of progress before she began to gather dishes.

“Oh Laura!” exclaimed Perry, “let us handle that.” She nudged LaFontaine as she pushed her own chair back.

“Perry, you guys cooked. It's only fair that we clean up.” Laura reached out to take the large serving platter from the middle of the table which Perry snatched before she could grab it.

“No no. It's fine. You just rest.”

Reluctantly, and very slowly, Laura sat back down. She was still smiling, but her smile had gained a dangerous edge which was not lost on those still seated at the table. Perry, on the other hand, started humming happily as she whisked dishes into the dishwasher and sink, so happy she could help with the coming baby.

x-x-x

“Ooh, and I rolled another six. Sorry Laf, you lose another one.”

Laf removed another piece from the board. “Seriously, you have one guy there! How have you taken out eight of mine?!”

Carmilla picked up the red die with a smug smile. “Serves you right for underestimating the true strength of the Norse people.”

“I'm attacking from Iceland, they're vikings too!”

“Please, you started that horde in Alberta, they are totally Canadians,” said Danny, “only way they're beating some vikings is giving them hockey sticks and telling them Olaf has the puck.”

Laf considered this for a moment before leaning down to their pieces. “Psst, that's Bettman. Git’em!” they stage whispered, pointing at Carmilla's piece before rolling, “ha! Six-six-four!”

Carmilla rolled. “One. Your swarm of toothless barbarians buys your filthy lies and tears my poor Nordic villager apart. I hope you're proud of yourself.”

“Victory, eh?”

Everyone burst out laughing as Danny got up and headed into the kitchen. “I think this calls for dessert!” She ducked into the fridge, pulling out a plastic cake carrier. Putting it down on the counter, she lifted the lid with a flourish, revealing a low, wide brown slab, adorned across the top with raspberries, mint leaves and a dusting of icing sugar. “Voila! Flourless chocolate cake!”

“Wow, Danny!” exclaimed Laf, “did you make that?”

“We all did. Laura borrowed the recipe from her work.”

“It'll be in the lifestyle section next week, if you like it,” chirped Laura from where she was fiddling with the microwave.

“It certainly looks amazing,” said Perry, “even cold, the aroma is incredible.”

“You shoulda smelled this place yesterday when we baked it,” said Carmilla, “we ended up having to go out for dinner just so that we wouldn't eat the thing instead.”

“Oh man, I know that feeling, I have to hide in my lab when Perry bakes for that exact reason,” said Laf, “I can't wait to try this thing.”

“Soon enough,” said Danny, plating out five slices, “we just need one more finishing touch.”

“Fudge!” exclaimed Laura, stepping up with a bowl of molten chocolate which she began drizzling over pieces of cake.

“Wow,” said Laf, barely able to keep from drooling, “isn't this great, Perr?”

“Um, yes,” said Perry with a worried look, “uh, Laura? Are you sure you wouldn't like some fruit instead?”

“What?” said Laura flatly.

Danny took a step back, subtly sliding the knife away. “Uh…”

Carmilla watched Laura carefully. “Oh…”

Perry continued obliviously. “Or maybe some cottage cheese. Something less sugary? This book says that—”

Laura slammed the bowl of chocolate down onto the counter with a bang, making everyone jump. “Perry, enough.” Laura's expression was tight as she stared across the counter at her friend. “I get you're trying to help and I appreciate it, I really do, but do you think I'm not reading books too. Do you think I'm not taking care of myself? Hell, the reason we did this cake is cause chocolate is  _ good _ during pregnancy. Perry, I love you, but I won't let you, or anyone, start treating me like a stupid child again just because we're dealing with something new.”

“Laura, I wasn't trying… I mean… I suppose I…” Perry looked across the island at Laura's pained expression and sighed. “You're right… you're right! I'm sorry… I was just so excited.” 

Laura's expression softened and she walked around the kitchen island, pulling Perry into a hug. “I want your help. I'm gonna  _ need _ your help once all I can do is waddle around. Just try not to hover, alright?”

Perry chuckled with tears in her eyes, squeezing Laura tight. “I think I can do that.”

“Good, cause convincing my Dad to back off is gonna be so much worse.”

“Actually, that reminds me,” said Carmilla, “I had to chase him off the other day. He was trying to wrap all the exposed edges in the house in foam.”

“Wait, is that why the front walk is all gritty?” asked Danny.

“Yeah, apparently foam isn't quite as resilient as yarn for playing in with claws.”

Laura chuckled. “Though I suppose I have help with that.”

“Very convincing help,” said Perry a bit uncertainly.

Laura gave Perry another reassuring squeeze. “C'mon, let's have dessert, the hot fudge is getting cold.”

With a murmur of agreement, everyone grabbed a plate and headed back to the living room where Carmilla began exacting revenge for her fallen troops.

“So, where did you read that chocolate was beneficial?” asked Perry as they watched the plastic carnage.

“Oh, right here,” said Laura, turning the page over from the sugar caution to a paragraph extolling the virtues of dark chocolate.

Perry's mouth opened and closed soundlessly as she gave Laura an embarrassed look. Laura returned it with a smug grin.

“Well, I guess I know who to turn to when I need advice once I'm expecting,” said Perry, smiling warmly.

“And I'll be more than happy to help,” replied Laura, wrapping an arm around her friend as they watched Laf’s pieces get washed away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't a clue how accurate the baby advice I included in here is. I mostly just dug around maternity websites looking for tidbits, so grain of salt since I haven't fact checked.
> 
> I hope this was a fun one for you guys as well. Let me know!
> 
> -Juniper


	58. Between the Pages

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's always wise to be aware of your surroundings.

“Oops…”

Danny looked at Carmilla incredulously as she took a deep breath, trying in vain to make her pounding heart slow. “Carm, we just knocked over a library stack, I don’t think ‘oops’ quite covers it.”

“Ok, so we weren’t quite as low-key as we were hoping,” said Carmilla, redoing the top few buttons on her top, “but it’s not like anyone heard that.”

“I’m less concerned about what any _ one _ thinks and more about what any _ building _ thinks.” Danny looked around nervously.

Carmilla smirked. “Oh, c’mon. The library likes us. You think I’d have tried jumping you in here before we helped Laura ‘Wicked Witch’ Maman? The place woulda swatted us before I even managed the first hickey.”

Danny unconsciously tugged her collar a little higher, trying to cover the mark Carmilla had been in the process of leaving when the shelves had given way.

“So long as we clean up, it’s not gonna try to kill us or anything,” said Carmilla. A book fell from seemingly nowhere, smacking her on the head. She rubbed her head, glaring at the empty ceiling. “Though it may not have anything against mild concussions.”

Danny looked at the book. “‘Unburning Alexandria’, subtle,” she said, looking up.

Carmilla snorted as she wandered around and surveyed the tilted stack where it had lodged against a pillar. “Alright, Gingersnap. I’m gonna go push this thing back up, you go stand out of the row so I don’t have to worry about pushing this thing over on top of you.”

Danny came round the end, watching as Carmilla ducked into the space under the shelf. “We are so lucky we weren’t in a place where this could domino.”

“I don’t think it’s so much luck,” grunted Carmilla as she wedged herself with her back to the pillar, “as this living escher painting we call a library wouldn’t be caught dead with nice even rows. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised to find shelves on the ceiling if this pile of wood wasn’t too lazy to hold them against gravity.”

An echoing groan, somewhere between a growl and a creak of aged wood emanated from around them.

“Prove me wrong then,” Carmilla taunted. They waited a moment, but only silence answered her, “exactly. Alright, Dan’, let me know when I’m almost there.” With a grunt, Carmilla pushed hard and the row of shelves began to shift back upright.

“You’re doing it,” said Danny, impressed by her girlfriend’s quick progress, “you doing okay?”

“Yeah, this damn thing is really heavy,” groaned Carmilla, “which is annoying cause I know that  _ something _ could be done to lighten it.” She turned a glare to a random point on the wall. Again, she got no response.

“Just a little further and it should start to tip back into place,” said Danny, wishing she could help in some way but even as a wolf, she just didn’t have the strength for something of this scale.

Carmilla leaned into the shelf and with a grunt, gave it one more shove, shifting the centre of gravity just enough for the stack to tip back onto it’s base. However, the momentum proved to be a little too much and the shelf began to travel past the vertical. Danny’s breath caught and she cringed, bracing for the inevitable crash into the other aisle. The moment didn’t come however as the shelf’s progress was suddenly arrested in mid air and it snapped back upright. 

“Oh, so you could’ve done that this whole time?” groused Carmilla, sweaty from the exertion, “lousy... judgemental... amazon-damned…”

“Alright Babe,” said Danny, stepping up to give Carmilla a pat on the back and a kiss on the head, “go sit down and rest. I’ll start cleaning up the books.”

“Thanks Danny,” said Carmilla, sliding down the wall to sit on the floor, “I’ll give you a hand in a couple minutes.” Thinking for a moment, she pulled out her phone and started writing out a text. “You think Laura would be out of class by now?”

Danny checked her watch. “Yeah, I think so. What order do you think these go in? I’ve got a textbook about horticulture, one on Ancient Mycenae, what appears to be half of a singed copy of Goblet of Fire and… ‘Playing God: A guide to advanced alchemy’.”

“Ooh, grab that last one for the bionerd,” said Carmilla, reaching out to take the text from Danny, “as for the rest, I doubt order matters. Organization is just a suggestion in here; I’m fairly certain I actually saw the card catalogue laugh at someone once.”

“Works for me, that’ll make things go a lot quicker,” Danny said, placing books on shelves, “what’d Laura say?”

“Serves us right for having fun without her, winky face, heart, heart, cluster of hearts…”

Danny hefted a huge cookbook onto the shelf next to a copy of something called ‘The Book of Steve’. “So is she gonna come give us a hand?”

“Yeah, she’s just stopping to grab a snack first.”

“Oh good, a sugar rush should really help us get through this quick.”

“She could be getting something healthy like an apple or granola bar or— yeah, she’s getting cookies.”

“Maybe try getting a hold of Laf and Perry too. With all five of us, this should go really quick.”

Carmilla just stared at Danny deadpan.

“What?” she asked.

“Okay, first: between ‘wait, this looks interesting, lemme just read it for a sec’ and ‘oh, I really don’t think that book goes there. Let me just dust it off first and then we’ll find it’s right place’ we would be here til the end of the semester. And second: do you really want to have to explain  _ why _ all these books are spilled?”

Danny’s face scrunched up at the thought. “I see your point. Alright, no one besides the girlfriend learns of this.”

A screeching groan of wood echoed from somewhere around them.

“Ok, the girlfriend and a sentient arcane vortex masquerading as architecture— why did we think it was a good idea to make out in here again?”

“I don’t thinking came into it, my dear,” said Carmilla, stashing her phone in Danny’s bag, “personally, I like to think of the library as a little like a cat. Sure, it’s kinda weird at first but then you realize it doesn’t really care and can’t really tell anyone anyways. I mean, what’s it gonna do? Throw the collected works of Bram Stoker and the Kama Sutra at someone?” She stood up and stretched, making her way into the aisle to help.

“You’ll forgive me if I err towards the side of prudence now that I’m thinking about it.”

Carmilla stepped past Danny, making a point of taking her by the waist and pressing up right against her as she slid past. “You sure about that, Red?” she asked, stepping further down the aisle with a sashay of her hips.

Entranced, Danny took a step after her. “Well, I suppose if we’re careful this time and we watch— hey, cut that out!” snapped Danny, shaking her head to try and dissipate the rather pleasant twist in her stomach, “I’d prefer to not get smacked for getting distracted from the task at hand.”

“Oh, I’m sure it wouldn’t mind so long as we didn’t leave. I’m sure Laura would appreciate the surpr—” Another book, a paperback this time, flopped from somewhere onto Carmilla’s head. With an undirected glare of annoyance, the plucked the book off her head. “‘A Case for Chastity’... I almost feel like I need to ravish you on principle now.”

“Please don’t,” said Danny, “throwing books is this place’s idea of a gentle suggestion, I don’t want it to get insistent... You can ravish me later.” Danny wiggled her eyebrows at Carmilla before returning to the shelf.

“You’re killing me, Lawrence.”

“Yeah, but you were already dead,” said Laura from the far end of the row, making both her girlfriends jump.

“Jeez Hollis,” exclaimed Danny, “how the hell did you get here so fast?”

“Well, I got a snack, as well as something for each of you, so stop with the sad kitty eyes, Carm,” Laura admonished the vampire, tossing a paper bag over to her, “I came over to the library, walked in the front door and out of the bathroom just over there apparently.” She jerked her thumb behind her.

Carmilla handed the bag to Danny, a bite already missing from the large chocolate cookie in her hand. “See? I told you it liked us. Hot girlfriend, delivered promptly.”

Danny smirked at Carmilla. “I’m beginning to agree with you, though you really shouldn’t talk about our girlfriend like she’s something to— nope, just heard it in my head. Not saying it.” 

Carmilla chuckled. “Care to give us a hand, Cupcake? I think we’re both feeling a little... frustrated at the interruption.”

“Oh, I’d love to, but let’s pick up these books first.” Laura winked at them as she began putting away volumes at her end of the row. Carmilla and Danny stood frozen for a moment, staring at her with red faces and stupid grins.

“Well, I don't know about you, but I feel really motivated all of a sudden,” said Carmilla, holding the cookie in her mouth and throwing herself into the task at hand.

Danny laughed, taking a bite of the peanut butter cookie still left in the bag before grabbing another book and sliding it away.

x-x-x

“So long ‘The Exhaustive History of Combine Harvesters’!” gasped Laura as she slammed the last book home.

“Wow, that took long enough,” said Danny, collecting her bag from the wall, “remind me to have a cold shower first if I want to come in here with one of you again.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” protested Laura as they started heading for the stairs, “leave me out of this, you’re the ones that decided to get frisky in public.”

Carmilla coughed. “littwotwelve!”

Both Danny and Laura went red.

“As I was saying,” stuttered Laura, “I think you’re right. Discretion is the better part of valour after all. Though I have to say, I must’ve missed something good. I’ve seen the big study desks fly into these shelves without so much as a quaver.”

“What?” deadpanned Carmilla, looking up incredulously.

“Oh yeah, it must really like us,” laughed Danny as they made their way towards the exit, “like spending a whole bunch of time with us at least.”

“...run down...obstinate...kindling repository…”

“Calm down, Carm,” said Laura, wrapping herself around Carmilla, “let’s try to avoid making threats towards the large, mercurial, eldritch mystery that we’re still inside.”

“Think of it this way,” added Danny, tangling herself into the embrace, “if it kills us, then we can’t finish what we started… with added help no less”—she shared a half-lidded glance with Laura—”and that would just be a tragedy.”

Carmilla perked up considerably, picking up the pace as they ascended the stairs. “Alright, you make a good point.”

Danny and Laura breathed a sigh of relief as the front doors came into sight. However, one last book plummeted from above, landing on the floor in front of them with a large smack.

“‘The Taming of the Shrew’,” read Danny aloud.

“Oh no…” moaned Laura.

The two looked at Carmilla, watching to see what she would do. Much to their surprise, she smirked, meeting the gaze of the stone gargoyle over the doorway.

“Damn straight,” declared Carmilla, wrapping an arm around each of her girlfriends, “c’mon, I think we have some… reading to brush up on.”

Arm in arm, they left the library, ignoring what sounded vaguely like an annoyed groan behind them.


	59. Return to Cinder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some surprises lead to others.

“Hey, hey Drix!” called Charlie, bounding into the living room with a tablet, “I found this really cool video online!”

Drix looked up from the homework he was doing on the coffee table. “What sort of video?”

“It’s really funny, you just gotta watch it or it’ll spoil the joke,” said Charlie, a look of excitement on her face and she held the tablet out for Drix to take.

“Sweet, sounds good,” he said, holding the tablet in front of him and touching the play button.

The video started with what appeared to be a crowd scene at a plaza somewhere. People were simply wandering through the frame, unaware of the camera person filming them. Overtop of the footage, a jaunty piano tune was playing, suggesting a prank set up.

“Is this a flash mob?” asked Drix.

“Hush,” scolded Charlie, “you’ll see.” She reached forward and touched the volume control, turning it up before sitting back.

Drix leaned in, wondering what was going to happen as the camera started to zoom in.

**AAAAAAAAAAA!!!**

A grotesque face popped up on the screen as the speaker crackled, the audio levels blowing out. Drix jumped back, caught completely off guard by the screamer. Behind him, Charlie started to laugh triumphantly.

Then the tablet caught fire. 

Drix dropped the device on the coffee table and both siblings just sat still for a moment as it sparked and sputtered violently. However, it didn’t last long as panic started to set in.

“Mama!” cried Charlie as she backed away from the fire.

With a rush, Carmilla flew into the room, going bug-eyed at the fire in the middle of the room. She looked around quickly and grabbed the blanket they kept over the back of the couch. Throwing it over the fire, she threw herself on top of it, smothering the flames.

Silence, only broken by the sobs and sniffles of the two frightened children, filled the room. Cautiously, Carmilla got up and lifted the blanket, revealing the smashed and melted tablet; some bits of it were still glowing slightly, but it didn’t look like it was going to reignite. Satisfied that it was safe to ignore for now, she turned to the task of comforting her children.

She knelt down and gathered up Drix under her right arm, holding her left arm out for Charlie, who quickly joined the embrace. She held them close, letting herself calm down, now that her babies were safe.

“Shhh… I’m here, I’m here,” she cooed, stroking the backs of their heads as their sobs began to ebb. Taking a moment to sit them on the couch, she grabbed a box of tissues and set about cleaning them up, “can you guys tell me what happened?”

“I…” Charlie sniffled, “Hazel showed me a video with a jump scare at the end. It was pretty good, it really got me. I thought it was really funny, so I wanted to show Drix.”

“I don’t know what happened,” said Drix, “the guy popped up and I wanted it to go away and then I felt hot and then the screen exploded!”

Carmilla stared slack-jawed at her son. She hadn’t expected this so soon. “Oh my poor boy,” she said, lovingly cradling his cheek. She tilted his head up so she could look him in the eye and smile at him, “that must’ve been frightening, but it’s not something you have to be scared of. Lighting fire is something we can do, something  _ you _ can do.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. You’ve seen me doing it, like when I light newspapers in the garbage bin.”

“Man, Drix can set fires with his mind? That’s so cool!” exclaimed Charlie.

“Wait…” said Drix, the wheels in his head almost visibly turning, “I didn’t want to set the tablet on fire. What if start setting other things on fire?! What if I set someone else on fire?”

Carmilla smiled gently. “Good for you for thinking about that, with that attitude I doubt you’ll hurt anyone. It can happen, obviously,” she said, emphatically gesturing at the slagged computer. Both kids giggled at the theatrics, “which is why I’m going to show you how to use it. Once you know what it’s like, you won’t use it accidentally, even if you’re really scared or angry.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yep, I’m sure.”

“Of course she is, Drix,” Charlie chimed in, “think of what would happen if Mama set things on fire every time she got irritated. The house would’ve burned down years ago.”

Carmilla playfully narrowed her eyes at Charlie who smiled right back at her. “I want to say you’re wrong… but you’re not… so that’s actually pretty good proof… I’ve raised you too well apparently.”

“Yup!” replied Charlie, popping the ‘p’.

“Honey, I’m— what smells like an aneurysm in here?” came Danny’s voice from the kitchen.

“Then you should probably have a shower,” replied Carmilla, getting up to go give Danny a hello kiss.

“Oh, ha ha,” deadpanned Danny, meeting her wife’s lips, “seriously what? Is that Laura’s tablet?”

“It was,” said Carmilla, looking over her shoulder at it, “but it was worth it, I think. Drix found his fire today.”

“I assume you’re not talking metaphorically,” said Danny.

Carmilla shook her head.

“Well, then, that’s a pretty good achievement,” Danny said, smiling at Drix who’d been still looking a bit trepidatious, “you gonna show him the ropes?”

“That’s the plan,” said Carmilla before turning to Drix, “so whaddya say, bud? You feel up to starting now?”

“Yeah… wait, no… I need to finish my homework.” He turned back to the table, lifting the destroyed tablet off the pages. “Mama, it’s burnt.”

Carmilla frowned and knelt down next to the coffee table, taking the tablet from him. Luckily, while several pages were darkened from the heat, Drix’s work hadn’t been consumed by the flames.

“It looks like you’re okay. If you’re teacher asks, just say they got too close to a candle,” said Carmilla, “Now, how ‘bout you finish your homework while your Mom and I make dinner, then we can have some fun with fire after.”

“Ok, Mama!”

“Charlie, why don’t you get some of yours done to?” suggested Danny, “you can help Drix if he needs it.”

“Might as well,” said Charlie, looking sullenly at the burnt out tablet before wandering upstairs to grab her things.

Danny and Carmilla both chuckled before heading into the kitchen.

“So, what are you feeling for dinner?” asked Carmilla.

Danny put her hand to her chin, feigning deep thought. “For some reason, I’m thinking blackened chicken.” She smirk at Carmilla who narrowed her eyes in return.

“You’re lucky that sounds delicious.” She poked into the fridge to grab some chicken as Danny began getting out spices.

x-x-x

“Ok,” said Carmilla, picking up a piece of newspaper from the pile she’d harvested from the recycling bin. She started wadding it up in her hands, “do you remember how you felt when you set the fire before?”

“Not really. I was just scared and wanted the face to go away,” said Drix.

“Hmmm… okay. Well, try not to think so much about being scared, you don’t want to link the fire to fear,” she said, tossing the wad of newspaper into the fire pit, “making it go away, however, is useful. It’s pretty much how I learned.”

“When did you learn how to use fire, Mama?”

Carmilla grimaced. “Well… you know how I told you that I used to be a not very good person?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, I hurt a lot of people and so they put up wanted posters to try and find me,” said Carmilla reluctantly, “I found one and it made me angry. I wanted it to get rid of it, and it caught on fire… as did the building it was nailed to. Mother didn’t let me go out for months after that.”

“I guess we were lucky it was the tablet.”

“Yes, we were. Tablets are cheaper than houses,” she said, “now, I want you to focus on that newspaper and think about making it go away.”

Drix stared down into the pit, focusing intently on the paper. They stood in silence for several minutes with nothing happening before Carmilla spoke. “Hmmm… maybe rather than just trying to make the paper go away, try to think of something you really want to go away.”

Drix nodded and returned to the pit. A moment later, a small flame burst forth from the edge of the ball of paper and began flickering happily.

Carmilla gasped happily. “Drix! You did it!” I’m so proud of you!”

Drix beamed at her.

“What did you think of?”

“Baths!”

Carmilla had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. From inside the house, she could hear Danny losing it followed shortly after by Laura. “Well, I’m glad you found something you think of,” she said, “but I don’t think you’ll have much luck setting your baths on fire, what them being water and all.”

“Yeah,” he said, dejectedly.

“Alright, I want you to do the same thing,” she said, wadding up a couple more sheets of paper, “and try to focus on the feeling when you ignite it.”

x-x-x

“...Happy Birthday, dear Charlie; Happy Birthday to you!”

The family stood around the table, Charlie sitting at one end and a white frosted cake with eleven lit candles sat in front of her.

“Make a wish, Charlie-bear,” said Laura.

Charlie thought for a second before taking a deep breath and blowing all the candles out. Everyone in the room broke out into cheers and applause.

“Happy Birthday, Charlie, “said Perry, “now let’s get this…” She trailed off as she noticed a candle still lit. “Odd, I could’ve sworn you got them all.”

“Same,” said Charlie, blowing out the candle with a puff, “now, I can’t wait—”

The candle she’d just blown out flickered back to life. Glaring at it, Charlie puffed it back out.

“Lafontaine,” asked Perry softly, “you didn’t put a trick candle on the cake, did you?”

“Nope,” they replied with a chuckle, “but I wish I had.”

Another candle flickered to life and Charlie blew it out. She was now crouched over the cake, watching intently.

It wasn’t until three more candles relit in succession that she whipped her head around, glaring at Drix where he was standing beside Aaron. “Cut it out!”

The two boys laughed and high-fived.

Charlie pouted, turning to Carmilla.

Carmilla laughed. “Don’t pretend that you wouldn’t be doing the exact same thing.”

“I know!” exclaimed Charlie, “I wanted to get him to do that to someone, but Aaron beat me to it!”

Aaron just shrugged. “Sorry, I had to go for it.”

Charlie scrunched her face up. “I know.”

“Well, maybe some cake would console you,” said Perry, stepping up and beginning to slice the cake, placing a large slice of chocolate and vanilla layer cake in front of Charlie.

“It’ll help,” said Charlie with a smile, “and as for you Aaron… you’re fired.”

The room filled with groans as Charlie dug into her cake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Borrowed slightly from Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar books for this one. I've always associated Carmilla's firestarting with Lavan Firestorm, so borrowing ideas of the training seemed natural (though I truncated the process quite a bit, obviously ;) )
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this one!


	60. Baking a Nap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chocolate cake - so decadent, so delicious, so soft?

The front door flew open with a bang as a laughing maelstrom of children flew into the house. The joyful cacophony was quickly joined by the pounding of footsteps and excited squeals as the resident kids ran downstairs to greet the visitors.

“Well, I’d say we’re here, but I guess the point it moot,” said Laura as she joined Laf in the living room.

“Nah,” said Laf with a grin, “let’s me know it’s the kids and not something that’s gotten loose from the lab.”

Laura looked at them with mild concern, eyeing the door to the basement.

“I’m kidding!” said Laf, “I haven’t had anything in there that could ‘get loose’ since before the kids were born.”

“Well, I’m glad becoming a parent made you a bit more sensible.”

Laf scoffed. “Sensible nothing. Just the big stuff is no fun when you’re a biologist. Let the xenozoologists have their wyverns and qilin. The tiny stuff is where the challenge is!”

Laura smiled and rolled her eyes at them. “Well, so long as the tiny stuff can’t come upstairs, possess someone and steal all the silverware.”

“Why would it steal all the silverware?”

“I don’t know. It’s just something that weird, possessing, entity things, do!”

“Which show?”

“I… that’s not… I mean… so thanks for taking the kids for the weekend. I’ve been looking forward to this trip.”

“It’s never a problem, we love having them,” said Laf, “I’m still surprised you guys are going to Niagara Falls. It seems a bit too touristy for Carmilla’s liking… Danny’s too, now that I think of it.”

Laura shrugged. “It is, but we’ve never been and it’ll be kinda cool to see and really, it’s not like we’re going to be spending all that much time outside the room anyways.” Laura wiggled her eyebrows at Laf who took their own turn at a good-natured eye roll.

“Glad you could come to a compromise that worked for everyone.”

“Me too,” said Laura, “now we’ve got to make tracks if we’re gonna get there before sundown. You know how to reach us if you need to.”

“That we do, you guys have a fun trip.”

“Will do,” Laura replied before calling up the stairs, “alright, I’m going. You guys be good for Laf and Perry!”

“We will,” called Charlie, “bye Mom!”

“Bye Mommy,” echoed Drix.

“I love you!” called Mercy before the clatter of play from above resumed.

“Alright, have a good trip and pick me up something cheesy from the hotel gift shop,” said Laf as they walked Laura to the door.

“Absolutely,” said Laura, giving Laf a hug, “have a fun weekend!” She walked back towards her place with a spring in her step as Laf shut the door and returned to the stairs.

“How do you guys feel about pancakes for lunch?” they called.

A series of happy ‘yeahs’ came back down the stairs as well as a ‘thank you’ from Mercy, making them smile.

Heading into the kitchen, they grabbed their phone.

> **Perr-perr <3**
> 
> _[Little monsters have arrived]_  
>  _[I’m making pancakes for lunch. Would you like me to save you some?]_
> 
> _ [No, thank you. I’ll be a little while longer at work.] _  
>  _[Could you leave the ingredients out? I’m making a cake when I get home]_
> 
> _ [Can do. What’s the occasion?] _
> 
> _ [I need an occasion to make a chocolate cake?] _
> 
> _ [lol, nope. just checking] _  
>  _ [need me to do anything?] _
> 
> _ [Put aside a couple eggs to come to room temperature] _
> 
> _ [We should really keep chickens for the number of eggs we go thru] _
> 
> _[It’s a lovely idea]_  
>  _[But the poor things would probably have heart attacks at the first pack member that wandered by]_
> 
> _ [oh, good point] _  
>  _ [ok, the eggs are out.] _  
>  _ [Which would the kids prefer? Banana or blueberry?] _
> 
> _ [Blueberry. We’ll use banana plenty when they’re out of season.] _
> 
> _ [Done. Into the colander they go] _
> 
> _ [Sounds tasty. I’ve got to get back to work] _  
>  _ [I’ll see you in a couple hours] _
> 
> _ [looking forward to it <3] _
> 
> _ [<3] _

 

They smiled as they upended the clean blueberries into the bowl of batter, gently folding them into the mix. This was going to be a hectic weekend, but very likely a sweet one as well.

x-x-x

“It’s strangely quiet,” said Perry as she walked into the living room, wiping her hands on a tea towel.

“Charlie and Hazel are over at Aaron’s,” said Laf, “Mercy and Sky had fallen asleep last I checked on them. Sky’s actually laying across Mercy’s back, I don’t know how they’re comfortable.”

“You took pictures, I assume,” said Perry with a smirk.

“Naturally,” they said, holding up their phone with a demonstrative shake, “Drix was amusing himself being a cat. I assume he’s asleep somewhere in here.”

“You don’t know?” asked Perry, glancing around with mild concern.

“He’s a cat. He doesn’t make a lot of noise if he doesn’t want to,” said Laf, turning the pages of notes they were looking over, “he knows not to go out without telling us. How goes the cake baking?” 

“Quite well,” she said, “I’ve got the layers done and cooling under some tea towels on the table. I’m going to go whip up some ganache to layer it and chocolate buttercream to frost it and we’ll have dessert for the weekend.”

Lafontaine’s grin widened as their eyes bugged out. “Perr, we don’t deserve you. That sounds like a contest entry, not just an after dinner treat.”

Perr preened a little under the praise. “Well, I figure if the girls get to go to Niagara Falls, the rest of us should get something special at home.”

“I love the way you think.”

“Good thing you married me then.”

“Good thing,” they agreed, getting up and embracing her.

She squeezed them tight, before pulling back slightly and guiding them into a kiss. They stayed like that, simply soaking in each other for a few minutes. 

When they finally broke apart, Lafontaine licked their lips with a dreamy expression, the taste of their wife’s kiss still lingering. “You want a hand making the rest of the stuff?”

“I would love a hand, and some company,” she said, moving to keep one arm around them as they moved back into the kitchen, “if you can start whipping the frosting ingredients together in the stand mixer, I’ll start melting the…” Perry trailed off as they both stared in confusion at the scene in front of them.

On the kitchen table, on top of the tea towels that had been laid across the cakes to keep them moist, Drix was stretched out, fast asleep, his paws twitching as he dreamed.

Perry and Laf looked at each other as their stunned expressions started to give way to smiles. Perry squeaked and slapped a hand over her mouth to keep in a laugh as Lafontaine started to turn red with the same effort. Thinking quickly, she grabbed their hand and led them out the back door onto the deck, sliding the glass door closed behind them before running out to the lawn and bursting into gales of laughter.

“Oh my goodness,” squealed Perry, as she began to peter out and catch her breath, “that’s adorable.”

“He looked so comfy,” said Laf, “but what about the cakes?”

“What about them?” she asked, “he’s just a kid. I doubt he realized the warm and soft thing under the towel was cake. Besides,” she added, pulling out her phone, “a few cakes will be worth the pictures.”

“At the very least, we’ve got pretty solid proof that you make the fluffiest cakes around.”

“As if you ever doubted it,” said Perry smugly, playfully bumping shoulders with them.

Quietly, they snuck back into the house, stepping up to the sleeping kitten on the table. Once they were satisfied that they had taken enough pictures, Perry reached out and gently stroked his head.

“Mrrrr…” Drix trilled as he stirred.

“Hendrix, sweetie. Wake up.”

His eyes opened slightly as he yawned and stretched, mewling softly in protest.

“I know you’re sleepy,” said Perr, scratching him on the head, “but I’m afraid you’re laying on my cakes.”

The kitten’s eyes bolted open and he ended up rolling off the table, landing on his feet, shaking with panic.

“Sweetie, sweetie,” comforted Perry, kneeling down and hugging him.

The child shifted in her arms and wrapped his own around her neck. “I… I’m sorry. I saw the towels on the table and they were warm and felt so nice… I’m sorry.”

Perry pulled back and looked at him, using her thumbs to wipe tears from his cheeks, “I know you are and it’s okay. You didn’t know.”

She glanced up at Laf, who’d pulled the towels aside and was snapping pictures of the aftermath. “It’s not that bad, Perr. I don’t think we can use these for a layer cake, but”—they broke off a piece and ate it—”the cake is still fine.”

“See?” she said to Drix, “we can fix this, and you know what? I know exactly how. Laf, honey, can you get out the whipping cream?”

“Sure, yeah.”

“Now Drix, why don’t you help me? We’re going to have some fun with this.”

“Okay!” said Drix, running into the kitchen, ready to help.

x-x-x

“We’re back!” called Danny as the three women entered the LaFerry house.

“Mommy!” cried Mercy joyfully as she bounded into her mother’s arms.

“Aw, I’m glad to see you too. Did you have fun?”

“Yeah,” said Mercy, “me and Sky got to play all weekend, and me and Hazel and Laf played fetch in the yard and Perry made really good chocolate thing which we ate all weekend.”

“Wow, that does sound like a great weekend,” chimed in Carmilla.

“Mercy, it’s your turn,” called Charlie.

“Gotta go, we’re playing Sorry.” Mercy ran back into the house as the three women chuckled and followed after.

“The prodigal wives returneth,” proclaimed Laf, “how was Niagara Falls?”

“Pretty good, I think we saw the falls at some point…” said Carmilla, scratching her chin.

“There was a great view of them from our balcony,” added Danny.

“I suppose there was,” agreed Carmilla, “does that count?”

“Nope,” said Laf, grinning at them.

Laura laughed. “Guys, stop it. We did manage to do the boat under the falls thing and even crossed into Canada to see the falls on their side,” she said, “but yeah, it’s good that room service is a thing.”

“Well, it sounds like you had a good time, regardless,” said Perry.

“Sounds like things didn’t go too badly here either,” said Danny, “what was this ‘really good chocolate thing’ that we heard tell of?”

Perry chuckled lightly. “We made a lovely chocolate trifle, with some help from Drix. You’re welcome to have some while the kids finish up their game.”

“Sure!” exclaimed Carmilla, before coughing and schooling her expression, “I mean, we’d love to have some, thank you. Especially if my boy helped”

Perry smiled smugly before opening the fridge and pulling out a half-empty glass bowl with different shades of brown layering up the inside. Pulling out enough bowls for everyone in the house, she heaped generous portions for everybody. After bowls were delivered to the kids in the living room, the adults settled in around the kitchen table.

“Perry, this is amazing!” gushed Laura, struggling to not simply shovel the concoction into her face.

“Yeah, Perr,” agreed Danny, “you gotta give us this recipe.”

“By all means,” said Perry, pulling out her phone, “you begin with one set of cooling cakes and one small panther…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is inspired by a photoset I saw on tumblr (http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/163627767458/petermorwood-frederbee-catsbeaversandducks). One look at it and I just had to write it. I know this is two "oh Hendrix" chapters in a row, but kitty antics are just too fun to ignore.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it!


	61. Least Said

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Accidents happen.

“ _ I’m trying hard not to resist the joy…” _

Laura’s hips bounced back and forth as she moved around the kitchen with a broom, singing along with the stereo. She paused for a moment to dislodge some stubborn dust in the corner before twirling around.

“ _ Don’t listen to me I’m being paranoid…” _

She danced around the table, ducking the broom in amongst the legs and chairs. Nowhere could the dirt hide from her.

“ _ I might try hard but it’s too hard to avoid…” _

Finally getting the dirt into a single pile, she laid down the dustpan and began dusting it up, sweeping in time with the music.

“ _ My heart, skips, a beat… My heart...” _

Laura looked down into the trash can, music forgotten for the moment. On top of the garbage, lay several brightly coloured shards of porcelain. Laura stared at them, trying to place the familiar pattern. That’s when it hit her.

“Uh… Danny?” called Laura, a mild panic beginning to take hold.

The only answer was the dull sound of the vacuum somewhere upstairs.

“Danny!” shouted Laura.

The vacuum shut off followed by the pounding of someone coming down the stairs.

“What? What is it?” said a frazzled looking Danny.

Laura grimaced and pointed into the still open garbage bin.

Danny frowned at her wife’s behaviour but walked up to see what she was so distressed about. However, one look in the garbage brought her onto the same page.

“That’s Carmilla’s ming vase, isn’t it?”

“I think so.”

“The one she got while in Saigon with Mattie?”

“Yep.”

“The momento she has of her beloved sister whom she hasn’t seen in over a decade.”

“That appears to be the case, yes.”

“What happened? Did you knock it over?”

Laura whirled around, looking completely offended. “I did  _ not _ knock it over. I might be a bit of a klutz, but I know how to be careful around precious keepsakes.”

“Sir TARDIS Mug the ninth, I think, would argue otherwise.”

“Ok fine. I’m careful with  _ other _ people’s keepsakes,” conceded Laura, scrunching up her face at Danny, “and why the heck isn’t it ‘Lady TARDIS Mug’?”

“Easy,” smarmed Danny, “it isn’t the thirteen regeneration yet.”

Laura’s face went slack. “You win this round, Lawrence. Now how about you help me figure this out before Carm gets home and reenacts the fall of Arcadia.”

“So if you didn’t break it, who did?” asked Danny, helping Laura fish the shards of ceramic from the can.

“I dunno. One of the kids, probably? Though at their age, I doubt they’d try to hide it like this.”

“Well, one way to find out. Everyone in the kitchen now, please!” called Danny.

“Hey what’s— Mom, did you break Mama’s vase?” said Charlie as she walked in, eyes falling on the broken ornament.

“Why does everyone think it was me?” asked Laura.

“No idea,” said Drix, coming down the stairs, “maybe I should go into the hall and sleep on it. Maybe something will hit me.”

Laura simply glared at the remark.

Danny chuckled. “So I take it from your peanut gallery impression that neither of you broke this?”

A pair of shaking heads answered her.

“Mercy?”

“Maybe, but I doubt it,” said Charlie thoughtfully, “she went out with Sky before you guys got home, so we’ll have to wait to ask her.” 

Laura stroked her chin. “yeah, but I think you’re right, she’d have left the shards out. Maybe Sky knocked it over while she was here? She wouldn’t know it was something special, she’d just clean it up and tell us when she saw us.”

“Sky’s the exact opposite of a klutz, not really something she’d likely do,” observed Drix, “unless she threw it.” He chuckled.

Charlie punched him in the arm. “It was one time!”

Both siblings laughed as Drix rubbed his arm.

“Alright, y’know what?” interjected Danny, “who broke it isn’t really relevant right now. What can we do about this?”

“Can we fix it?” asked Laura, “how long do we have before Carm gets home?”

Danny glanced at the clock. “Probably not long enough. She texted earlier to say she was running an errand.”

“It can’t be that hard. It’s just like a puzzle… it just needs to be assembled quickly and precisely…” Laura trailed off as she looked at Danny who was already on the phone.

“Hey Perry, can you come and give us a hand with something?”

x-x-x

“That’s not going to work,” said Lafontaine as they looked between the vase pieces and the glue.

“Oh, you’re just being negative,” rambled Laura, “sure, the final product will look a little… off, but it’ll be together and my wife won’t lose the only thing she has to remember her long lost sister and everything will be fine!”

Perry looked sadly between the pieces and Laura. “Laura, sweetie. I’m afraid they’re not talking about your plan, they mean that literally.”

“What?” asked Laura sadly.

“This is really fine porcelain,” Perry said, holding up a shard, barely thicker than a sheet of paper, “there’s not enough surface for glue to set. I’m sorry.”

Both Laura and Danny looked crestfallen.

“Alright Perr,” said Danny, “thanks for coming by to try. You wanna at least stick around for dinner?”

“Well, yes to the invitation,” said Lafontaine, “but I don’t think it’s time to completely give up.”

“But you said…”

“I said  _ glue _ wouldn’t work,” they said slyly, “there’s something I’ve seen pictures of that I’ve been wanting to try that just might work.”

Perry lit up. “Oh, you mean those pieces you showed me?”

“Exactly,” they replied, getting very visibly excited, “give me a few minutes to run home. I think I’ve got some things in my lab that I can use.”

x-x-x

Laura watched, fascinated as Lafontaine heated the small pot over a bunsen burner they’d set up on the edge of the fire pit. Inside, the silver liquid shimmered as Lafontaine kept it moving.

“Alright, the pieces I’ve seen use gold to do this, but I think pewter should work for our purposes,” said Laf, using a pair of foundry tongs to grab the pot and bring it to where they’d set up two of the larger pieces, “with luck, this’ll set into the seam and hold the ceramic once it cools.”

Gently, they turned the pot and poured the molten metal into the waiting fissure. Almost immediately, the two pieces shattered into many, even smaller pieces.

“Or the extreme heat will destroy what we were trying to fix,” they added studiously.

A low chuckle came from behind the group. “Y’know, kintsugi doesn’t actually use raw metal. They just add metal powder to a lacquer,” said Carmilla from where she stood on the steps.

“Oh…” said Laf, obviously making a mental note.

“Carm!” said Laura, rushing up and wrapping Carmilla in a hug, “I’m sorry!”

“Sorry? Sorry for what?” asked Carmilla, “sure it made a bit of a mess, but better to experiment with garbage pieces before trying it on something valuable.”

“Garb— Carm, wasn’t that your vase?” asked Danny.

“Yeah. I knocked it over with my tail this morning,” she said matter-of-factly, “worst part is that I had to spend most of the afternoon to find another vase to hold those dried flowers, though I think I found a good one.” Carmilla pulled out a vase that looked like it was made out of stained glass. “Ooh, also Cupcake, look what I found for the mantle,” she added, pulling out a small figurine.

“Ooh, weeping angel!” exclaimed Laura before shaking her head, “wait, but your vase. Didn’t you get that in Saigon? With Mattie? Isn’t that all you have left of her since she disappeared?”

Carmilla studied Laura carefully. “Disappeared? Cupcake, it’s only been about ten years. For a vampire her age, that’s barely a sabbatical. But you’re right, I suppose I did get it in Saigon; I stole it from a seer when Mattie dared me to. I was nursing bruises for weeks after that, but what really hurt was seeing the fifty identical copies at a tourist shop the next day.”

“So it’s not a long treasured item you’re heart-broken to lose?” said Danny.

“It’s annoying, but it’s not like I broke the locket she left with me.  _ That _ would be worth crying over.”

“Wait... locket?” said Laura, “you mean the one she...?”

Carmilla snorted. “No, not that one. She loves me, but she doesn’t trust me  _ that _ much. It’s a renaissance piece to remind me of her.”

“Oh, that makes sense,” said Laura, completely deflating.

“Don’t tell me you all got worked up trying to fix this old memory.”

“Okay. We didn’t get all worked up trying to fix that old memory,” said Danny, “also, that’s a complete lie.”

Carmilla smiled at her wives, reaching out to add Danny to their hug, “you two are the most caring, loving idiots a girl could ask for.”

“Don’t forget your caring, idiot friends!” called Lafontaine.

Carmilla chuckled. “That too.”

“Well, I guess we can relegate this stuff back to the bin,” said Danny.

“I can’t believe you guys picked that out of there,” said Carmilla, “I hope you washed your hands.”

“Of… course… we did…” said Laura, moving inside to the kitchen, “now who’s ready for some dinner.”

“I certainly am, Cupcake, but let me just recommend one extra step first,” said Carmilla as she steered both Danny and Laura towards the sink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For serious whovians in the audience. I am aware the ‘thirteenth’ mug would actually be the fourteenth regeneration, but I’ve decided that Laura had to use an ordinary Doctor Who printed mug while her ninth TARDIS was on backorder.
> 
> Also, Laf was totally me until I looked up how it was done. Looks like actual metal, who knew?
> 
> Hope you all liked this one! See ya next week!
> 
> -Juniper


	62. Sincerest Inspiration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Making music pop is often just a matter of the right accompaniment.

Mercy bent over the mixing board, headphones held tight over her ears as she wore a frown of concentration. With every passing second, her expression became more and more frustrated.

She cracked open one eye to glance at her sound engineer, who was listening with a more thoughtful expression. “Jasper, try bumping it up a little in the low end.” 

With only the slightest nod, he reached up to push one of the sliders, making the recording sound a bit richer.

She bobbed her head from side to side, trying to decide if she liked what she was hearing. “Maybe pull back the high end from the instrumental track…”

Jasper made a few more adjustments on the board before looking back at Mercy. For several seconds, she kept listening, slowly looking even more sour before finally whipping the headphones off and slamming them down on the mixing table.

“Oy. Careful luv,” cautioned Jasper, “those things ain't cheap.”

She turned her head to glare at her compatriot sidelong, though received only an admonishing look for her efforts.

“You can glare all you want, but they’re still your phones so you’re the one who’s gonna have to pay to replace them. Well, that or we can try using the backups” He held up pair of earbuds tangled into several knots, grinning smugly as he did so.

“Ugh, fine,” said Mercy, dropping her head to the table, “I won’t break the really expensive headphones.”

“That’s the spirit!”

“I’m tempted to forego that promise about certain engineers though.”

“Tsk, tsk. I don’t think your cousin-in-law would be very ‘appy with you if you maimed her band’s keyboardist.”

“Eh, I could fill in,” she said, a smile coming back to her face, “arms only take a few weeks to heal, right?”

“Not to mention that the talent upgrade would be pretty sweet,” cut in Ava Regan as she walked into the studio.

“No one bloody appreciates me,” grumbled Jasper, “‘ere I am, ‘elping out of the goodness o’ my heart, and I get no appreciation.”

“I pay you almost twice the going rate,” deadpanned Mercy, “I don’t think you have much argument here.”

Jasper looked thoughtful for a moment. “Of course, what I meant to say was “Thank you Miss, can I ‘ave another?”

Mercy laughed and shoved him playfully. “Oh come off of it, you dork.”

“Never!” he proclaimed with a grin.

“He’s serious,” said Ava, “he never will. It’s rather annoying.”

“You call it annoying, I call it a feature,” said Mercy as Jasper beamed, “so what brings you by my lovely studio?”

“Looking for this one,” said Ava, putting a hand on Jasper’s shoulder, “he didn’t show up for band practice.”

“Why are you practicing at— oh my god, it’s after seven,” exclaimed Mercy as she ran to grab her phone and turn it back on, “Sky is going to kill me!”

“Only if you missed lunch,” said Ava, drawing a confused look from Mercy as she shook her phone, trying to will it to boot up faster, “I called her when neither of you picked up. She figured you lost track of time.”

Mercy tapped her index finger-tips together sheepishly. “Ok, I may be developing a bad habit with my album recordings.”

“So what had you so focussed as to steal away our window dressing?”

“Hey!”

“Well, it’s this track,” replied Mercy, turning on a speaker, “I think the song has potential, but everytime I record it, it sounds empty.” She hit the play button and her voice started to flow from the speakers in a slow ballad, accompanied by guitar and a backing track.

Ava shut her eyes and listened, scratching her chin sagely. After less than a minute, she began nodding. “Uh huh, yeah, I think I can hear the problem.”

“Really?” boggled Mercy, “we’ve been at this for… well, hours apparently.” She glanced at her phone. Two missed texts, could be worse. “How could you hear it immediately?”

“Perspective. You wrote it as a ballad, so you only hear it as a ballad. However, what you’ve got here, if I’m right, is a pretty good upbeat number.”

Mercy looked at Ava like she’d grown an extra head.

“I’m serious,” said Ava, opening her hands towards Mercy, “Jasper, how much control do you have? Can you speed it up without raising the pitch?”

“Uh, yeah,” he moved over from the physical mixing board to the computer he had set up, “it’ll sound distorted though.”

“That’s fine, it’s just a proof of concept.”

A few clicks later, Jasper restarted the track. The resulting music sounded rough, like a poor autotune, but it was clear from the get-go that Ava had the right idea. The quicker pace was an automatic shot in the arm to a song that had been, until now, anemic. Mercy’s smile grew and grew as her head bobbed along to the new track.

“Ava, you’re a genius. I mean, I’ll need to compose a bridge and completely rehash the instrumentals. What this really needs is…” Mercy trailed off as her gaze fell on Ava and Jasper.

“What?” asked Jasper.

“Are you guys still going to rehearse?”

“Tonight? Nah, we’d normally be wrapping up by now,” said Ava, “I was sent to fetch the bozo here and then we were going to round up the SOs and get dinner.”

Mercy started composing a text to Sky. “Well, why don’t you all come over for pizza? I’ve got a proposal for you.”

“On the condition that we go for a run,” said Jasper with a grin, drawing odd looks from the other two, “what? Me and the boys don’t have nice forest side houses and apartments. We wanna stretch our paws a little.”

Mercy laughed. “Alright, dinner, proposal, run. We can shake-a-paw on it.”

Ava and Jasper echoed Mercy’s laugh as they shut down the board and headed out.

x-x-x

“Are you sure you want the electric for this one?”

Mercy looked up at Ava as she tuned the blue Telecaster, the rich twangs pulsing from her monitor.

“Yeah, the acoustic would’ve been a bit too folky for what I’m going for… although…” Mercy whipped out a notepad and began scribbling notes onto the small manuscript.

“Oy! Mercy! Focus!” called Jasper as he hooked cables into the sound board.

Mercy snapped back to reality and shoved the notebook away. “Right, sorry. Inspiration, y’know? Moose, you write most of your guys’ stuff. Back me up here!”

“Gladly!” he agreed as he plucked his bass experimentally, “it can strike at any time and it can’t be ignored lest your muse forsake you.”

There was a groan from behind the drumset. “Thank you, Shakespeare.”

“You’re just mad cause you can’t compose for beans, Ralphie,” Moose taunted.

“Okay guys, calm down. Sorry I said anything,” consoled Mercy.

“Oh they’re fine,” said Ava, “fighting is how my boys tell each other ‘I love you’. Right boys?”

A collective retching sound was the only response.

“Oh yeah, so much love.” Mercy chuckled. “Hey KC? You sure you’re okay handling the board. You’re a really good lead singer, it doesn’t feel right to have you sitting out.”

“No, I’m good. It’s not like you’re hornin’ in on one of our gigs. We’re here to help you. Besides, I don’t sing soprano,” he added with a wink.

“Nothing a good swift kick couldn’t solve,” jeered Ralphie from the back, making the rest of the band break down in laughter.

KC chuckled before turning back to Mercy. “Yes. I am truly hurt at not getting to sing for these nobs.” They shared a high-five before he turned and walked back into the control room.

“Alright, I think we’re ready! Let’s get this show on the road,” proclaimed Mercy as she sidled up behind the mic, “Ralphie, if you would please?”

“Gladly,” he said, crossing his drumsticks in front of himself, “and a one-two-three-four…”

x-x-x

“So… what do you think?”

It took every ounce of Mercy’s willpower to keep her relaxed posture in the easy chair. She knew Cas probably wouldn’t care, but she looked up to him and didn’t want to give away how tense she was feeling about this demo. She didn’t often show him her own performances.

“Well, I think if your goal is to keep the leather from coming off my chair, you’re doing an admirable job of it.”

Mercy looked down at her hands where her knuckles had turned white from gripping the chair arms so tight; so much for looking relaxed. She lifted her hands, shaking them to try and get a bit of the soreness out.

“And the song?”

“Well, it’s good… really good, but you knew that,” he said, taking a sip of coffee, “don’t get me wrong Hollis, I love it when you share your personal projects, it makes for a nice break from the day, but it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you so twitchy about it. Sell the song or put it on one of your albums. It’s a solid win either way.”

“Well, that’s the plan, but I wanted to ask you what you thought about the band?”

Cas raised an eyebrow. “Pretty good, from what I could tell. Bright sound, good balance, some very interesting flourishes. Hard to tell when they’re playing back up, though.”

Mercy nodded sagely. “Well then, might you be interested to hear what they sound like when they’re up front?” She held up a memory stick.

He smiled at her. “I would be. Does this band have a name?”

She tossed the stick across to him. “Moonlight.”

x-x-x

“Ralphie, you’re getting ahead in the second bridge… again.” Moose glared at the drummer.

“I am not. I think you’re falling behind,” Ralphie rebutted, “Ava, you heard him.”

“Sorry Moose, but Ralphie is right. You’re slowing down on the syncopation.”

“I am? Damn, I was so sure that I had it.”

“C’mon guys,” said KC, “it’s late and we’re all making mistakes. I’m fairly certain I sang ‘the heaves in autumn’.”

“Well, it is the season for stomach flu,” said Ava.

“Gross,” deadpanned Moose, “let’s pack up and grab a bite.”

“Great, I could eat a… oh hey Mercy,” Ava greeted her second-cousin as she walked in the door, “come by to recruit us for another awesome recording session?”

“Well, not exactly,” said Mercy.

“What do you mean ‘not exactly’?”

“Well, I showed my boss the song… which he liked… but then I showed him one of your albums…”

“Wait, wha'?” asked Jasper, his eyes lighting up.

“And?” said Ava, leaning forward.

“And… he liked you guys,” said Mercy, “he wants to hear more.”

“Bloody hell! Mercy, you’re amazing!” exclaimed Ava, surging forward to sweep her up in a hug.

“Hey, hey, calm down,” said Mercy, “it’s not a guarantee of anything, but Cas has connections and if he thinks there’s somewhere you guys might fit, he’s a very good foot to have in a door.” She held out Cas’ card to Ava.

“I don’t know what to say,” said Ava as she turned the card over in her hand.

“Say ‘we’ll record songs for you anytime’!” exclaimed Ralphie.

“Well, I was gonna say ‘thank you’ was enough, but that’s not a bad offer,” said Mercy with a grin.

“Well, consider it made, but for now, I think drinks are on us,” said Ava as the band started packing up.

Mercy smiled. “Sounds great.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, character rolecall. I'm kinda poking into the obscure lists today. Jasper, Ralphie, Moose and KC are Ava's band and pack. They've previously shown up in 'That Girl' from Family Disney Adventures and '100' from You Do for Family. Cas is Mercy's mentor from the YDfF chapter 'Mercy's Going Places'.
> 
> Also, my apologies to any british people. Ava's entire pack is from england, so I was trying to express that without being too on the nose. However, being from Canada, I'm fairly certain I failed miserably. Oh well. Sorry, eh?
> 
> Hope everyone liked this one.
> 
> Cheers!  
> -Juniper


	63. Deked Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You gotta love it when free tickets just fall into your lap.

“What do you mean it's _this_ Friday?”

Carmilla looked at Laura with stunned disbelief. Laura, for her part, had the good manners to look chagrined at the news she'd just broken. “I'm so sorry. Frank was going to cover the mayoral ball personally but he hurt his back doing yardwork yesterday and he's bedridden.”

Danny pinched the bridge of her nose. “Why does no one ever lift from the knees?” she muttered, “is there no one else that can go? I mean…” She gestured to the hockey tickets stuck to the fridge with a magnet.

“Believe me, I already tried,” said Laura, “Frank asked me personally if I could cover for him. He's a friend of the mayor and he wanted someone he trusted to go in his place.”

“Is it really the best idea sending the person who lambasted the mayor to her own party to rub elbows?” asked Danny.

“That was the last mayor,” said Laura, “my articles helped her win office, so she likes me… for now.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Until you find which closet is holding the skeletons.”

“Well, it's possible that she's a perfectly upstanding politician who's an example of integri— yeah, she's gonna hate me in a couple years.”

“But, until then you get to suck up on your boss’ behalf,” said Carmilla bitterly.

“Suck up? No no no, Frank knows that having me at that party is tantamount to a ticking crocodile in Neverland.” Laura grinned predatorily before frowning at the tickets. “You two should go to the game and have fun. You've both been looking forward to it.”

“And what are you going to do?” asked Danny, “go to the party alone?”

“Not alone,” temporized Laura, “I can recruit an intern to go with me… or maybe Kevin, I don't think he's ever been to one of these things.”

Carmilla and Danny shared a look before giving Laura a deadpan stare.

“Yeah, that's not gonna happen,” said Danny, “one way or another, we're having our date night.”

“I can think of worse alternatives to a hockey game than a fancy ball,” said Carmilla, “we might even have an opportunity to share a waltz.” She shared a coy smile with her wives.

“Alright,” conceded Laura, “I guess we're all going to the ball on Friday. So what should we do about these?”

A cough came from the living room, prompting the three of them to turn. In the doorway stood Charlie while behind her on the couch sat Aaron with a hopeful look on his face

“Well…” started Charlie, “you could —and I'm just throwing out ideas here— give the tickets to your deserving daughter and her best friend.”

“That's a great idea,” said Danny, “Mercy and Rodney would love that.”

“Mom!” whined Charlie.

“I'm kidding, I'm kidding,” laughed Danny, holding up her hands defensively., “the tickets are yours.”

“Yes!” exclaimed Aaron, punching the air.

“You guys can borrow my car,” said Carmilla, “it'll be easy to park but still fit both of you and Hazel comfortably.”

“Hey, who said we were bringing Hazel?” said Aaron.

Charlie whipped her head around and glared at him, and he paled.

“I mean, of course we'll bring Hazel… and here, take my wallet, just don't hurt me.”

Charlie rolled her eyes as her mothers laughed.

“Alright. Now that we're decided, time to figure out what we're going to wear,” said Carmilla, “cause of we're doing this, we're gonna be the best damn pieces of arm candy that those city hall types have ever laid eyes on.”

“Why do I get the feeling we're going to be needing a hotel room as well?” said Laura wryly.

“Well, there'll probably be an open bar,” mused Danny with a smirk, “so, y'know, it'll just be the safest option.”

“Yes,” agreed Carmilla, “totally driving safety, and not the plunging neckline I'm already planning on.”

“Good,” said Laura, “I'm glad we're all on the same page.” She sidled closer, settling an arm around each of her wives’ hips.

“Ooooookay,” said Charlie, signalling to Aaron, “we're just going to head over to Hazel's and invite her along. Thanks for the tickets. Bye!”

The three women waited until they heard the front door slam shut, then smiled at each other.

“You think they bought it?” asked Carmilla.

“If _they_ did?” asked Laura, “heck, I'm in on it and I'm kinda convinced.”

“I'm kinda disappointed that it's not actually ‘til next month,” said Danny, rubbing along her collarbone, “the ball and… everything… sounded really nice.”

All three shared another look before stampeding up the stairs.

x-x-x

“Thirty bucks for three hotdogs and drinks,” groused Charlie, holding hers and Hazel's hotdogs in each hand, “it's legalized robbery.”

“Hey, I suggested we get burgers beforehand,” protested Aaron, as he balanced his own hot dog and the drink tray “but no. You insisted on the stadium concession because ‘it's part of the experience’.”

“Well it is, even if the cost is ludicrous,” she argued as the turned into the gate for their section, “and make no mistake, we're going back for nachos and cheese before the third period.”

Aaron made a face. “I don't think whatever that stuff is can be reasonably classified as cheese. I'm honestly surprised it doesn't dissolve the chips… which makes me all the more worried about what the hell the chips are made out of.”

“Well, as far as I'm concerned, both are classified as delicious,” countered Charlie as they edged down the row.

“Hazel,” said Aaron as they approached, “your girlfriend is a barbarian.”

“Why?”

“I like cheap stadium nachos,” explained Charlie as she sat down, handing the hotdog off.

“Mmm…” said Hazel, “we are totally getting some before the third period.”

Charlie flashed a horrifed Aaron a grin before turning back to Hazel. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She gave Charlie a quick peck. “Now, let's settle in. These are amazing seats and I don't want to miss a moment. How did your parents land third row, centre ice? I woulda thought that these would be locked down by season ticket holders.”

“Beats me,” said Charlie, “Mama landed them through some connection of hers. Through Zeke, I think.”

“Dr. Antos is a hockey fan?” asked Hazel.

“No, these came from someone at the hospital,” said Charlie, “as I understand it, Zeke is more into cricket.”

Hazel nodded. “That makes entirely too much sense for him, honestly.”

“I dunno,” said Aaron, “I always took him for more of a pro wrestling guy.”

“Really? Zeke? Doctor formality?” asked Charlie.

“Hell yeah,” said Aaron, “he's totally the sort who'd cut loose by watching a spectacle of overwrought theatrics.”

“I can totally see what you're getting at, though I think he'd be more into pantomime,” argued Charlie.

“Same-diff, really,” countered Aaron.

“Ok, fine.”

“Hey, you guys. Anthem time,” interrupted Hazel, pointing to the singer waking to the end of the carpet laid on the ice.

“Ugh, this is always so difficult with snacks. Alright,” muttered Charlie as she managed to rearrange and stand just in time.

x-x-x

“Alright, that wasn't a bad first period, even if the ref seemed to be asleep,” groused Aaron as the players disappeared back into the locker rooms.

“I'm telling you that wasn't tripping,” argued Charlie, “your guy just can't skate.”

“Lies and slander,” exclaimed Aaron, “just what I'd expect from someone supporting such an underhanded team!”

“Underhanded? Why I—”

“Ladies and gentlemen,” boomed the voice of the announcer, “we please ask you to join us for a very special occasion.”

“Hey guys,” said Hazel with a grin, “you're on the scoreboard!”

They looked up to see that the camera was focused right on the two of them, so close that even Hazel was cut out of the shot. On the secondary screen, a field of hearts appeared.

“What the…” started Aaron.

“My dearest Charlotte,” said the announcer, “will you marry me? Your Aary Bear.”

A ripple of encouraging cheers came from around the arena as their disbelieving looks turned from the board to each other. Both were completely lost for words.

“C'mon you guys,” crowed Hazel, “are you gonna tie the knot or not?”

“Hazel, if you had something to do with this, you're toast,” said Charlie, not turning away from Aaron.

“So what do we do?” he asked.

“Possibly murder,” said Charlie, “but for now, commit to the moment?”

“I guess,” said Aaron with an amused smile, “give the people what—”

Aaron very quickly found two hands on the sides of his head dragging him into a kiss with his best friend and all around them, the crowd exploded into cheers. After the longest two seconds of their lives, they broke away, though Charlie was still holding Aaron fairly close.

“Yugh,” she said, “that was like kissing my brother.”

“I _wish_ that was like kissing your brother,” said Aaron, “Charlie, I love ya, but I need some mouthwash.”

“Agreed.”

“Woo!” cheered Hazel, tossing a handful of confetti at them, finally getting Charlie to round on her.

“Hazel, I…” Charlie trailed off as her cell phone started buzzing. As she took it out, Hazel simply grinned.

 

> **_BioLafzard_ **
> 
> _[Congratulations!]_

 

> **_Cat Mom_ **
> 
> _[Have you set a date yet?]_

 

“This makes a lot more sense now,” said Charlie, showing Aaron her phone.

“Alright, fair play, but how did they time that?” he wondered, “Haze, did you message them?”

“Nope,” she said, pulling a small pair of binoculars out of her bag. She handed them to Aaron, pointing up towards the luxury suites.

Following her direction, he looked along the row until… “Oh, son of a bitch!”

“Lemme see,” said Charlie as Aaron handed them off. Looking through, she very quickly found what he'd been looking at.

Waving at them from the balcony was not only Laf and Carmilla, but all three of their families. Charlie lowered the binoculars, not certain whether to be annoyed or impressed. She was still deciding when another buzz came from her phone.

 

>   ** _Cat Mom_**
> 
> _[Come and join us for your engagement party!]_

 

“C'mon you love birds,” said Hazel, gathering her things, “our families want to congratulate the happy couple.”

“Well, I can think of worse things,” said Aaron, standing up, “shall we ‘Honeybunch’?” He held out his hand to Charlie.

“Ooh, of course, 'Sweetums’.” She took his hand as they walked up the stairs.

“Yuck, please shoot me if I ever start using names like that in earnest,” said Hazel.

“Oh, you'll understand one day, when you meet the right person,” replied Charlie in a sickly-sweet voice.

“If they're the right person, they'll understand.”

Charlie thought on that for a second. “Y’know? You're right.”

They laughed as they found their way to the suite elevator, which they were quickly let into with a ‘congrats’ from the attendant. Once the door closed and they were out of sight, Charlie and Aaron dropped their hands and Hazel found herself glued to the wall by her girlfriend's lips until they reached their floor.

“I needed that,” said Charlie as she broke away, licking her lips.

“H-happy to help,” said Hazel dreamily, leading the way to the suite.

“Congratulations!” exclaimed everybody as Charlie and Aaron entered the room, throwing confetti and setting off party poppers.

“Yeah, yeah,” said Charlie, waving everybody of dismissively.

“How could you two?” exclaimed Drix with obviously feigned distress, “Aaron, I thought we had something special and Charlie… my own si— mmmph.”

Drix's tirade ended as Aaron pulled him into a kiss and dragged him over to a couch.

Charlie shook her head amicably, wrapping an arm around Hazel as Laf and Carmilla walked up. “There better be cake after all this.”

“Of course there is,” said Laf, tilting their head towards the refreshment table where a half eaten cake reading 'tulations’ sat, “I did a pretty good job on it.”

“You did?” asked Charlie.

“Why is everyone always so surprised that I can bake?” exclaimed Laf, “I learned from the master!”

“And you're very good at it sweetie,” said Perry.

“Well, I hate to say it,” said Charlie, “but this was damn well done.”

“Agreed,” said Aaron, wiping the corner of his lip as he walked up, “though you owe us another game with centre ice seats without any shenanigans.”

“I've heard of worse reasons for a family outing,” said Carmilla as Laura gave the idea an enthusiastic thumbs up.

“Well, let's call that a plan,” said Laf before blossoming into a grin “and in the meantime… your move.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prank war Round 3. Carmilla and Laf's turn. Part of me wishes I thought of these more often, but I'd really just end up running it into the ground I think.


	64. Craving In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pregnancy cravings can result in some odd choices

The jingling of keys filled the air as Laura hopped out of the car and tore towards the front door. Fumbling, she struggled to fit the keys into the lock. With a set look of determination, she steadied her hand and finally got the key inserted, turning the key and listening for that satisfying...

_ clunk _

Laura glared at the deadbolt for having the gall to be unlocked when she’d gone to the trouble of getting out her keys and figuring out how to get them into the lock while panicked. The staredown didn’t last long however as she remembered the reason for her panic. Pulling her key from the bolt, she threw open the door and leapt into the house.

“I’m back!”

“So you are,” commented Carmilla as she levered herself off the couch with an expression of wry amusement. She moved slowly, a hand across her swollen belly. “Did you have fun?”

“I suppose ‘fun’ is a word you could use to describe that grocery trip, though I think I may have scared the staff a little.”

“That’s my girl!” praised Carmilla, “you mind if I grab it from you? I think this little guy is gonna claw his way outta me if I he doesn’t get what he wants.”

“Oh yeah, I… left it in the car!” squeaked Laura, bolting back out the front door.

Carmilla chuckled. She’d be tempted to tell Laura to calm down if she hadn’t been a hundred times worse when Laura had been at this point last year.

“Ok! I got it, I got it,” exclaimed Laura, scurrying into the kitchen and promptly slipping on the hardwood. Luckily, she managed to grab the kitchen island to steady herself before she completely fell over. “I’m okay!”

Carmilla covered her smile with one hand; maybe a little calming was in order. “Slow down there, Cupcake. I hope you were a little more orderly at the store… or is there some poor stock boy cleaning up an explosion of soup cans?”

Laura pouted at her. “I did  _ not  _ knock over any displays, soup or otherwise. I may have left the cheese counter a little disarrayed, but if they didn’t want it torn up, they’d organize it logically. I mean, the display looks appealing, but there is no rhyme or reason beyond the cheeses being kinda similar.”

“You forgot the name of the cheese, didn’t you?” teased Carmilla.

“I did not,” retorted Laura, “but they decided that chevre belongs over with the feta rather than with… I dunno… the other french cheeses?”

Carmilla shared Laura’s look of derision. “Ok, you’re right. They deserve to have their display mixed up a little.”

“Thank you!” declared Laura, pulling out a tub of chocolate ice cream, “now, do you wanna scoop or crumble?”

“I’ll scoop,” said Carmilla, “we want to leave some ice cream for Danny, after all.”

Laura narrowed her eyes at Carmilla, but held her silence. Grabbing the tube of goat’s cheese, Laura moved to the utensil drawer, pulled out a pair of kitchen shears and snipped open the end of the tube, pulling it back to expose the delicious cheese within. She turned back to Carmilla who had two decent sized bowls of chocolate ice cream scooped out and ready.

“So how much do you—” Laura was cut off by Carmilla snatching the open tube from her hand and squeezing nearly half the contents into her bowl. 

Placing the cheese to one side, she hungrily grabbed a spoon and dug in. It wasn’t until she caught Laura’s incredulous stare that she paused mid bite. “Uh… sorry.”

Laura rolled her eyes with a smile. “It’s fine,” she said, adding a small amount of the cheese to her own bowl, “you’re lucky I know how urgent those cravings can be.” She paused to try a bite. “Mmm… this is a good one. I wouldn’t have considered these together, but our son in there has some good taste.” Laura pointed at Carmilla’s belly with her spoon.

“Well…. mostly…”

Laura cocked her head. “Mostly?”

“There’s one craving that keeps popping up that is so stupid, I just kinda ignore it.”

“Carm, you shouldn’t do that,” scolded Laura, “Danny and I are always happy to get whatever you and the little guy want. Day or night.”

“It’s not that,” said Carmilla, “it’s just a little… odd.”

“C’mon. What is it?”

“...garlic bread”

“Sorry, what?”

Carmilla grimaced. “Garlic bread, alright.”

A guffaw burst from the back of the room. Carmilla and Laura spun around to see Danny with one hand clamped over her mouth as her shoulders shook with laughter.

Carmilla glared at her wife. “I swear to god Xena, I will make you sleep on the lawn tonight.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” said Danny, fighting through laughter to compose herself, “it’s just really funny. Have you ever _ had _ garlic bread? How can you be craving it?”

“I don’t know,” said a defeated looking Carmilla, “I’m not even certain it’s actually garlic bread I want, but when it happens, I want bread and butter and _ garlic _ . The thought of it is nauseating right at the same time that it makes me hungry.”

“Are you craving it right now?” asked Laura.

“No, luckily this little gentleman is keeping tonight’s order a little more civilized.”

“Ooh, what combination?” asked Danny, craning her neck to look into the bowls.

“Chocolate ice cream and chevre,” said Laura, extending a loaded spoon, “this might be one to keep in mind. It’s tasty.”

“Mmmm,” agreed Danny, taking a taste, “not bad. Y’know, I might have an idea we can try if his tastes take an italian bent again.”

“Please enlighten me,” begged Carmilla, “it’d be nice to have an out. It’s come up three times now and I’m not looking forward to number four.”

Danny opened her mouth but then thought better of it. “No. If you know what it is, it might not work. Psychosomatics and all that.” She chewed on her knuckle, thinking it over. “I’ll show Laura what I want to do later so either of us can take care of it. You just let one of know, and don’t keep it to yourself this time,” she added, narrowing her eyes at the vampire in admonishment.

“Alright, fine!” said Carmilla, digging back into her bowl, “at least I’ve got this one dealt with.”

“Thank goodness for small mercies,” said Danny with a chuckle.

Just then, the baby monitor in the corner crackled to life with the soft mewling of their daughter, up from her nap.

“Well, I guess you’re not the only one around here with cravings to satisfy,” said Laura as she put her bowl down and ran up the stairs to feed little Charlie.

x-x-x

“Uh, Danny?” said Carmilla, poking her with a toe.

Danny looked up. “Yeah, babe?”

“It’s happening.”

Danny went wide eyed. She leapt up from the couch. “Now? We’re still weeks out, aren’t we? I guess that doesn’t matter. I’ll grab your overnight bag and we can head to the hospital. We can call Laura to meet us once we get there and then we can get Dr. Antos, though I guess the hospi—” A couch cushion smacked her in the back of the head.

“Calm down, Red. That isn’t what I meant,” said Carmilla when Danny turned to look at her, “though you were really together there. Glad to know I’ll be able to count on you when the moment comes.”

“If that’s not what you meant, then what’s up?”

“I want garlic bread.”

Danny nodded. “Alright. Stay here, I’ll take care of it.”

“Thanks Sweetheart,” said Carmilla with a smile.

“Anything for you.” Danny leaned in and stole a kiss before scampering off to the kitchen.

While Danny worked, Carmilla tried to focus on her reading and ignore the growing hunger. She was so focussed in fact that she was caught off guard when she felt a warm weight settle against her.

“I’m home,” said Laura with a soft kiss to the temple, “Danny said that it’ll be just a little while longer and sent me in with this to help take the edge off.” She handed Carmilla a small glass of blood.

“You two are amazing to me, do you know that?”

“Yeah, we’re pretty great,” said Laura, leaning forward to talk to Carmilla’s bump, “and we’re gonna make sure you’re the happiest baby ever… with the possible exception of the one upstairs.” She rubbed Carmilla’s stomach softly, overjoyed when something pressed up against her fingers. She looked back up at Carmilla, who was beaming.

“Alright,” interrupted Danny, “moment of truth.” In her hands she held a basket with a cloth napkin folded over the top to obscure the contents. Offering the basket forward, she pulled back the cloth to reveal narrow slices of bread toasted golden brown and covered in a delectable looking topping of herbs and possibly cheese, also golden brown.

Reaching out, Carmilla took a slice. She sniffed it experimentally before taking a bite. It didn't take long before her eyes rolled back in ecstasy and she uttered a noise usually reserved for the bedroom, much to her wives’ red cheeked delight.

“Oh my god! That does it exactly,” she said, “though it’s a good thing I’m already dead, cause this tastes like I should be dropping dead of a heart attack.”

“Yeah, sounds about right,” said Danny, rubbing the back of her head, “it’s my grandma’s garlic bread recipe, sans garlic of course, and it was one of my Dad’s favourite foods right up until… well, you can probably guess.”

Carmilla winced sympathetically.

“Needless to say, he isn’t allowed to have it anymore. Grandma rarely makes it at all, for that matter. I think she felt kinda guilty.”

“No one should ever feel guilty about something that tastes this good,” said Carmilla, scarfing down the first piece and going for another, “what’s on here?”

“Aside from the bread… butter, parsley, mayo, a couple other spices, parmesan and then even more parmesan to make up for the garlic flavour.”

Laura let out an indecent moan of her own, having just taken a bite. “Ok, we are making this everytime we have pasta from here on out.”

“Uh, cupcake, did you miss the bit about heart attack bait?”

“I’ll be fine,” said Laura, “I do plenty of yoga.”

“My dad would go on several runs a week and this stuff still got him.”

Laura paused in thought, gazing at the bread. “Could be worth it.”

Charlie chose that moment to start babbling through the monitor, drawing their attention.

“Or I guess not, while they need me at least.” Laura headed up the stairs as Danny and Carmilla laughed.

“So,” asked Danny, leaning in, “did it work?”

Carmilla slowed her chewing and eyes moved up in thought as she concentrated on her hunger.

“Yeah… yeah, I’m not craving it anymore. This worked!”

“Ok, good. It’s not good when baby tries to poison Mama,” she said, leaning in and kissing Carmilla’s belly.

“So what do you think you’ll end up craving when it’s your turn,” asked Laura as she came down the stairs, nursing Charlie.

“Me?” said Danny, “who knows? With my luck, the kid will want me to root through the garbage for scraps.”

Laura and Carmilla looked at Danny with mild concern.

“I’m kidding. What do you take me for? Pregnant werewolves don’t root through the garbage… puppies do, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

“Well, good. I was worried I was gonna have to learn one of those delicacies that involves already rotting food,” said Carmilla.

“They usually call it ‘fermented’,” said Laura.

“I don’t care what they call it. With a nose like mine, it’s just ‘gross’.”

“If worse comes to worse, we can buy some blue cheese. It’s got that nice mouldy taste that should work.”

“Guys, I’m not going to be craving garbage!”

“Shh, it’s okay. We understand,” teased Laura.

“Ugh, you guys are the worst. I’m gonna start something a bit healthier for dinner,” said Danny, getting up.

“You want some help?” asked Laura.

“Nah, you finish feeding her and you just keep snacking,” she said to Carmilla, “it can’t kill you so you might as well indulge.”

“Well, if you insist,” said Carmilla, grabbing another piece as Danny left the room.

Danny pulled open the fridge and started pulling out ingredients until she was sure her wives’ attention was off of her. Once she was satisfied she could go unnoticed, she pulled out her phone and walked into the mudroom.

“Hey Mom… uh, weird question… did you get any odd cravings when you were pregnant?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Tuesday all! This one was inspired by another old comment of mine on the original story. The idea of a pregnant vamp craving garlic amused me.
> 
> I hope you all liked it!


	65. Cold Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the biggest challenge of being sick is not getting others sick too.

“Cub scout, forget it. I’m not letting you in there.”

Laura frowned, her grip tightening on the tray holding soup and cocoa. “C’mon Mel! Danny needs me.” She leaned back and forth, trying to find a way around the hunter and into the room.

“Laura, she is sick and if you go in there, you’ll get sick too. We don't get along, but I'm not about to wish a plague on you.”

“It's just a cold,” argued Laura, looking past Mel, silently willing Danny's door to dissolve so she could at least see, “even if I get sick, I'll bounce right back.”

“In the name of Artemis… it's not ‘just a cold’,” rebutted Mel, taking Laura by the shoulders, “it may have been a cold once upon a time, but that was before this little hellmouth we call a school got a hold of it, twisted it around and probably added little devil horns, just for good measure.”

“All the more reason she needs loving care!” exclaimed Laura, stamping her foot impatiently

“And she's getting it, Annie is taking care of her,” said Mel, jerking a thumb at the door, “we're not leaving one of our sisters to weather a fever, complete with sneezing, coughing and night terrors by herself.”

It was then that Mel looked at Laura's stricken face and realized she'd said too much.

“Night terrors?” whispered Laura.

“Well, not Lawrence… yet. Annie got them while Lawrence was caring for her.”

“So you have no problem letting my  _ girlfriend _ risk herself —and get sick no less— but you won’t let me in?”

Mel didn’t look impressed. “Firstly: let?”

“Ok, fine,” Laura admitted, “this is just the sort of thing she’d throw herself into. God, I love that woman.”

Mel smirked at finally making some headway. “And secondly, think about it; they are werewolves. If this bug made it past  _ their _ immune systems, neither you nor I would stand a chance.”

Laura’s shoulders slumped. “Fine. What should I do with this?” She raised the tray.

“Leave it by the door. Annie will grab it once we head back downstairs.”

“Okay,” said Laura, kneeling down to set the tray onto the carpet as Mel stepped aside to make room. Placing the tray down gently, she took a surreptitious glance at Mel before shooting her hand out towards the door knob.

“Yeah, no,” said Mel, easily grabbing Laura’s wrist before it even got close, “but thanks for playing.” She shook her head before pounding on the door. “Yo, Warbucks! Lawrence’s not-dead girlfriend left her some cold soup. Grab it, would ya?”

“Will do!” came Annie’s voice through the door.

Mel let go of Laura’s wrist. “And now here’s the part where you go away.”

“Can’t I at least stay in the lodge?” asked Laura, “I don’t want to abandon her.”

“Let me think about it. Mmm… no,” Mel said sternly, “you have a perfectly good dorm room, away from here. Along with another girlfriend, if I recall correctly, so why don’t you go use your time on her, instead of bugging us?”

“But—”

“And if it makes you feel any better, and gets you out of my hair all the quicker, if she needs you I swear that I’ll... get Elsie to call you as soon as possible.”

“Alright, fine. I’ll go, but I’ll be back.”

“I know, unfortunately. Can you at least please wait until Lawrence is better so I don’t have to worry about you releasing a new plague onto campus?”

“Alright,” said Laura, starting towards the stairs, “though you think we could drop off something fuzzy for Danny to squeeze?”

“Doesn’t really seem like Lawrence’s style, but I think that’s fine.”

“Great,” replied Laura with a smirk as she headed down the stairs.

x-x-x

Danny groaned as she woke up. It was really hard staying asleep. Every part of her ached, her throat felt like it was filled with brambles and her head felt like it was about to explode from the inside out.

Slowly, as not to aggravate anything, she looked around the room, debating between trying to just get back to sleep or fighting through the aches to get another dose of cold meds from the desk. The room was mostly dark, lit only by the dull glow of her old lava lamp in the corner. Annie was curled up on the floor, fast asleep, ready to help at a moment's notice, though Danny was reluctant to wake her. As eager as she was to help, she was still visibly exhausted from her own experience with the bug a few days ago.

Deciding to just try and sleep, Danny fidgeted back and forth, trying to find a comfortable position. It was then she noticed something, a flicker of shadow just outside her window. She fixed her gaze on the glass, trying to make out anything, but even the dull light in the room made trying to discern anything in the inky blackness outside all but impossible. 

However, her attention was soon rewarded. Just beyond the glass, a pair of familiar yellow eyes caught the light, glowing in a fashion that would have been terrifying to anyone else. Danny, however, smiled gently at the sight. The telltale soft creak of the old window frame filled the silence as a huge black paw pushed it open gently, and the paw’s owner flowed into the room.

Annie, who'd been awoken by the creak, groggily got to her feet, moving to put herself between the intruder and her charge. Half-asleep and not quite aware, she began growing softly.

**_”Annie,”_ ** croaked Danny, to no avail. She coughed and cleared her throat, trying for more volume, **_“Annie. It's alright. It's Carmilla.”_ **

The wolf immediately stopped growling and backed up a few paces to give the panther space to enter the room.

“Thanks Akela,” said Carmilla, shifting back, “you can head out, I’ll take it from here.”

The grey wolf looked uncertainly between Danny and Carmilla, whining worriedly.

“ **_Annie, it’s fine.”_ ** Danny coughed.  **_“Go get some real sleep. You might be over the bug, but you’re hardly recovered.”_ **

Annie nodded and yawned before shifting back onto two legs. “Alright, that’s just too tempting to pass up, just… keep an eye on her, alright?,” she said, looking to Carmilla.

“I’ll do ya one better and use both,” said Carmilla.

**_“Sleep well, Ann,”_ ** said Danny softly as her sister slipped out the door. Once the door shut, she turned her attention to Carmilla,  **_“well, you’re a sight for sore—”_ ** She broke into a fit of coughing.  **_“—throat.”_ **

Carmilla frowned before walking over to the desk and grabbing the bottle and spoon that sat upon it. “Well, as nice as it is to finally see you, we need to get you back to sleep if you’re gonna beat this thing.” Carmilla punctuated her statement by pouring a generous dollop of the thick green syrup into the spoon. “Open wide.”

Danny, who felt too awful to protest being spoonfed, obligingly took the spoon, downing its contents with a grimace.  **_“Bleh. Not sure what’s worse. The illness or the medicine.”_ **

“Hey, count yourself lucky,” said Carmilla as she changed into a pair of sleep shorts from her and Laura’s drawer, “back when I was still alive, the concoctions tasted worse and worked about as well as a slap to the face, assuming they didn’t just break out the leeches to ‘suck the sickness out’. Scooch.”

Danny looked at Carmilla with confusion as the vampire looked at her expectantly.  _ “ _ **_What?”_ **

“C’mon Clifford. You need rest and we both know you don’t sleep half as well when you’re alone.”

Danny continued to stare at Carmilla dumbly, but slowly pushed herself back to make room on the twin mattress. Once Carmilla was satisfied there was enough room that she wouldn’t fall off, she gently slipped under the covers next to Danny. She snuggled close, resting her head into the crook of Danny’s neck while sliding one arm beneath her back and the other over her hips. Between the cuddling and the medicine beginning to take effect, Danny felt herself slipping back into slumber’s comfortable embrace. However, through the fog of grogginess, a thought occurred to her.

**_“Wait… Carm… you shouldn’t be here, not this close. I’m gonna get you sick.”_ **

Carmilla looked up at her with a sleepy smile. “Shhh… It’s fine. Vampires don’t get colds.”

x-x-x

“ **ACHOOO!!!** **_”_ **

“Vampires don’t get colds, huh?”

Carmilla glared at Danny as she wiped her running nose. “Ok fine,” she groused, “vampires don’t get  _ common _ colds. After so many damnedable decades here, you think I’d know what this stupid place can dish out by now.”

“Hey, on the bright side, it’s not hitting you as badly,” consoled Danny, holding a hand to Carmilla’s forehead, “you’re not even running a fever.”

“Yet, I’m still stuck in here.”

Danny crawled onto the bed so she was sitting behind Carmilla with the vampire between her legs. “Stuck in here with me”—she pressed a kiss just beneath Carmilla’s ear—”truly a death worse than fate.”

Carmilla laid her head back to rest on Danny’s shoulder. “Well, I suppose I can put up with it… for the safety of the campus.”

Danny chuckled. “The safety of the campus… of course.”

“It’s just too bad Laura can’t be in here right now,” lamented Carmilla, “this would be the perfect opportunity to binge something together.”

“Yeah, but this thing would tear her apart; we can’t risk her like that.”

“Also true, though I’m surprised she hasn’t tried to come in here anyways.”

“Oh who says she hasn’t?” said Danny nodding to the door.

“Beat it, Thin-mint!,” came Mel's voice through the door, “I’m not letting you in there!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'know, I suppose I could write one of these Silas chapters without Mel, but to be honest, I really don't want to. I love her so much.
> 
> For anyone wondering, 'Warbucks' is just a nickname. She's not _that_ Annie (though Little Werewolf Annie has a nice ring to it. This needs some thought.)
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed!


	66. Bonding Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quiet conversations can be an illuminating thing

A gentle breeze blew, rustling the leaves of the surrounding trees and caressing ripples into the lake’s surface. The morning sun glistened off the lake, nearly blinding in it’s intensity.

“Y’know, it’s a really good thing that myth about us isn’t true or we’d both be ash right now.”

Mattie looked up at where her nephew was lounging on a tree limb above her. Even higher in the upper branches, her great-niece could be seen flitting about, playing at chasing the sparrows.

“As I very much like being… well, not alive, but sustained let’s say, I am inclined to agree,” she said, adjusting her sunglasses, “though I’ve always found it somewhat appealing; an elegant way to go.”

“Elegant?” said Drix, “always seemed kind of boneheaded to me. ‘Well, it’s sunny out. Time to work near this unlocked roof access.’”

Mattie glared at him over her glasses. “You had to go and ruin my image of meeting the sunrise with a glass of merlot.”

“Kinda morbid, honestly,” observed Drix, “poetic… but morbid.”

“When you reach my age, Cub, you’ll find that many things, morbidity included, are fairly relative.”

“Perhaps. It’s a hard thing to imagine though,” he mused, “even getting as old as Mama feels like something I’d read in a book, not an eventuality.”

“It's only an eventuality if you're smart, darling. Too many kittens think they're invincible and then get staked before they even begin massacring a village.”

“Well, that's not really on my to do list, so I think I'm safe on that front,” he countered, “I don't think there are any villages around here, anyways.”

“Isn't there the village in town, Papa?” asked Levy as she dangled upside down from a tree branch.

Drix laughed. “Different sort of village sweetie. We're thinking more thatched houses, not a quaint shopping.”

“Oh,” she said before shifting back to an owl and chasing after a crow.

Drix watched her for a moment before returning his attention to Mattie. “We're lucky in that way, I suppose, me and her. We didn't get the sudden shock of death and new strength, we grew up with it and it grew with us.”

“But you still feel that urge to kill,” she said.

He tilted his head in thought. “I suppose I do, but controlling it is instinctual now,” he said, “and more to the point, I know how to prepare  _ her _ to deal with it as she comes of age.” He inclined his head in Levy’s direction.

“Are you certain you want to do that? A killer instinct can be highly useful when dealing with enemies, as poor Richard found out the hard way.”

Drix's face darkened. “That is precisely why I want to help her learn that control before she needs it. Yes, he probably needed to die to keep us safe, but I barely gave him a chance before I snapped his neck.”

“Snapped his neck? That's all it took?”

“...yes,” replied Drix, uncertain of her tone. Moments later she burst out laughing, further unnerving him. “I fail to see what you find so funny about your grandfather's death. It still gives me nightmares from time to time.”

“Richard was millennia old. If you'd taken off his head, pickled it in holy water and buried it at a crossroads, that _ might _ have been enough to kill him had he been in his prime,” she explained, “I'm not certain what's funnier, that Mother managed to weaken him  _ that  _ much, or that he attempted anything in that state. Mind you, for his age, he wasn't that bright. He was still trying to appeal to Mother's ‘better nature’ as we put him into the ground.” She looked up with a grin, only to be met with a concerned frown.

“It worries me that you don’t realize how sad that actually sounds,” he lamented, “lucky chance he was weakened aside, that act left me scared and doubtful about hurting everyone I love for years.”

“But you didn’t”

“I didn’t. Even in my fiercest anger, my thoughts have never strayed towards harming them.”

“Others though?”

“And therein comes the control.”

“But we come back to my question. What if you need to kill to protect them? To protect her?” Mattie pointed at Levy as she glided low across the lake surface.

Silence answered her. She looked up to realize that he was no longer on the branch and she appeared to be alone on the lake shore. Mildly perplexed, she looked around, trying to spot where her conversation partner had gone.

“It’s a fair question,” she said to no one in particular, “slinking off to sulk won’t—” She turned back to find a panther snout inches from her nose. She pulled her face back by a half-inch but otherwise looked unimpressed. “You’re lucky I’m not very jumpy. I might’ve torn your leg off if you’d actually startled me.”

Drix shifted back and took a seat next to her. “You’re assuming I’m being an idealist about this, not that I blame you, I am my Moms’ son after all.”

Mattie nodded and rolled her eyes.

“But, I’m also my Mama’s son. I’ve inherited some of her more… pragmatic views. As long lived as we are, especially with the occasional interesting character the pack seems to attract, it kinda seems to be an inevitability. That’s what my control entails. Not locking the impulse away for it to break out when I least expect, but keeping it on a leash where I can monitor and, if needed, utilize it”

“I knew I liked you for some reason,” said Mattie, “you should join me for a sojourn through some exotic locale.”

Drix chuckled. “Somehow I don’t think you’re talking about a family vacation.”

Mattie laughed as well. “Not quite what I had in mind, Darling.” She paused. “Although, I do know a lovely tribe of fey in Éire. They throw an amazing party and they absolutely adore children.”

Drix raised an eyebrow. “And how many of our children would return from visiting these fair folk?”

“Oh most of them, I’m certain,” said Mattie with a smirk, “the non-human ones at least.”

“Pass.”

“You’re no fun.”

“I’m plenty of fun,” he rebutted, “we should play Risk sometime.”

She just stared at him deadpan. “...no… thank you.”

“Smart move,” said Ruth as she wandered out of the brush, “he learned to play from Mir. It’s like playing chess with Maman was; strikes when you least expect it.”

Mattie looked impressed. “High praise.”

“Okay, I may have never met her, but I’m fairly certain being compared positively to Dean Morgan is a bad thing,” Drix said with a smirk.

“Only if you’re talking about something like school administration or child care,” said Ruth.

Drix eyed her warily. “...still. Are Hayden and Aero with you?”

“Yeah, they’re up in the trees somewhere…” Ruth looked around trying to spot them.

Up above, Levy hooted before diving into the branches from where a surprised yowl rang out.

“There they are,” she said with a grin.

Mattie looked fondly at the shaking branches where the youngsters were tussling.

Drix stepped up beside her, resting a hand on her shoulder. “You know you’re always welcome, right? We want you to be a part of their lives. They will always be loved in the pack, but having more vampires who they can look up to and learn from is important.”

“I’d think after our little conversation, you’d be a little more reticent about me passing on my wisdom.”

“A little I suppose, but I get the feeling you prefer the challenge of convincing through debate, not indoctrinating the uninitiated.” He smiled at her.

She returned his smirk. “My dear, you really do understand me.”

Drix just shrugged, smiling.

“Well, this family bonding is really quite lovely,” said Mattie, “but I think it’s time we got going. I wonder where Kitty-kat is…”

“Oh, Mama?” asked Drix, “she was the first one here.” He pointed up into the trees. “She was keeping an eye on Levy while we chatted.”

“You rang?” purred Carmilla as she dropped out of the branches.

“You’ve been here the entire time?”

“You think I’d miss a second of grandchild time?”

“Maybe for some sister time?”

“I’ve had centuries of that, and only years of grandkid, she takes priority,” she stated, “besides it sounded like you got some lovely quality time with your nephew.”

Mattie glowered at Carmilla for only a moment before inspecting her nails. “Well, I suppose it was an enjoyable conversation. Though a third opinion would have been nice.”

“Next time.”

“Well, before we plan next time,” said Ruth, “maybe we should go for _ this _ time?”

“Fine,” said Drix with a smirk, “Levy!”

“Hayden! Aero!” called Ruth.

“You sure the pups don’t mind us doing this without them?” asked Mattie.

“No more than when anyone else goes for a run on their own,” said Carmilla as the cubs ran in and Levy alighted on the bench, “lets us build our more intimate bonds.”

Mattie nodded approvingly before she shifted, leaving a golden lioness where the elegant woman once stood. Moments later, two panthers and a tiger also stood in the group, watching the lion expectantly.

Mattie cocked her head curiously before realizing what they were waiting for. With a slight eyeroll, she sat back and let loose a deep, bellowing roar which echoed through the woods, which was joined in turn by the rest of the group.

Turning into the brush, Mattie led the way into the woods as distantly from all directions, the howls of wolves sang in answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It occurs to me belatedly that I should add in a note on previous events. Richard was a vampire, Lilita's sire (we are really off of canon here) who sought them out for revenge in the chapter 'Protecting Hazel'. Just in case anyone was confused.
> 
> Enjoy!


	67. Perks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to wake up, time to go to sleep.

“Don’t turn that on!”

Lafontaine’s outstretched finger stopped just short of the coffeemaker’s switch. Raising an eyebrow at the dramatic statement, they turned and looked at Laura, who was pointing at them accusitorily. “Why?”

“Because then it would make coffee,” Laura said, unhelpfully.

Laf glanced back and forth. “Uh, yeah. That’s kinda the point of coffee machines. They make coffee. I mean if this one made something else, like say, fire ants, that would make more sense.”

“Why would it make fire ants?”

“I dunno. Maybe you got nostalgic for Silas.”

“I was never quite as enamoured with the alchemy club’s lounge as you were.”

“The kitchenette had a built in fume hood! How is that not awesome?”

“When you consider what they were cooking that required a fume hood.”

“I’m sure it was just for off-the-cuff, personal sorts of projects… that they expected to release all sorts of toxic vapours, yeah I see where you’re going with this,” said Laf, “but anyways why no coffee?”

“Oh, Danny’s asleep upstairs and the smell of coffee will wake her right up,” explained Laura, looking at the stairwell, “she was up  _ really _ late trying to get through a pile of final essays.”

Lafontaine winced. “Ooh, how many?”

“A little under two hundred,” Laura said before turning back and noticing Lafontaine’s bug-eyed stare, “second year course, still big enough for a lecture theatre.”

“Shouldn’t she have TAs to help her with that?”

“My question exactly,” muttered Laura, “there were apparently too few grad applicants this year and Danny supposedly drew the short straw to go without.”

“Supposedly?”

“This is Danny we’re talking about. If she didn’t volunteer to go without so that her colleagues wouldn’t have to, I would be flabbergasted.”

“I thought you got her to stop doing that.”

“I got her to stop doing that to me, but well… you can take the wolf out of the woods…”

Laf nodded sagely. “Please tell me she's at least getting one for that Shakespeare course next semester. What did she say? Four hundred freshmen?”

“Yeah, that was apparently the trade off. She only has to do without for one semester.”

“And boy are we thankful,” said Carmilla, coming down the stairs, hair slightly askew, “our poor wife's mind would never be the same after four hundred poorly constructed essays expositing all the phallic references in a Midsummer Night's Dream.”

“Is that actually a thing?” Laf was agog. “Please tell me that's not a thing.”

“No…” said Laura, prompting a raised eyebrow from Laf, “it’ll only be about three hundred. The rest will be highlighting the yonic imagery instead.”

Laf dropped their face into their hand. “I don’t know what I expected.”

“Well, I’m certainly surprised,” mused Carmilla, “hormonal obsession’s taken a step forward since I studied the bard.”

“Which go round was that?” said Laf, peeking out from their hand.

“I think I was… Arcillma, at the time? I don’t recall. I wasn’t really all that invested.”

“No kidding. Did you ever think that was a good name?” asked Laf.

Carmilla smirked. “Of course not, but it really irritated Mother.”

“A worthy cause, though you’ll forgive me if I say I’m glad you were ‘Carmilla’ when we met,” said Laura, draping herself over Carmilla, “‘Arcy’ is just not as nice to say as ‘Carm’” She nuzzled Carmilla’s neck, making her wife blank out slightly.

Lafontaine turned their head to feign a gag, eyes falling on the still-inert coffee machine.

“So, if Danny’s trying to sleep, shouldn’t we be keeping it down?” they asked, lowering their voice.

“Yeah, probably,” said Carmilla, looking up the stairs, “she was sleeping pretty soundly but—”

“Carrmm…” came a bleary voice, “you left.” Danny came off the bottom of the stairs and wrapped her arms around Carmilla, seemingly unaware of Laura and Laf.

“Yeah, she sleeps a lot lighter without someone to snuggle.”

Laf snorted. “Make sense, I… is she asleep standing up?”

“Nnnng,” grumbled Danny.

“Not quite… but close,” said Carmilla, adjusting herself so Danny could lean on her more comfortably, “c’mon Red, let’s get you back to bed.”

Danny shook her head; whether to wake up or protest, no one was quite certain. “No, we’ve got company. Wait… why do we have company?”

“We invited Laf over for Brunch while Perry was on her business trip, remember?” said Laura, a gentle smile on her face.

“Oh,” muttered Danny sleepily before perking up, “oh yeah! I was supposed to make french toast!” Levering herself off of Carmilla’s shoulders, she stumbled towards the fridge.

The other three exchanged concerned glances before Laura scampered after Danny. “Babe? We can make breakfast. Why don’t you head upstairs and get a little more sleep?”

Danny looked sorely tempted, but then her face steeled with resolve. “No, I promised you all french toast, and besides, if I don’t get up now, I’m gonna have the worst time getting up for work Monday.”

Laura looked torn. “Alright, fine. But,” she added, making Danny pause in her movement, “ _ I _ will cook breakfast. You’re running on three hours sleep. You and a hot skillet are not going to be a good combination.”

Danny raised her hand to protest and promptly dropped an egg on the floor. They both looked down at it before Danny met Laura’s ‘seriously’ expression with a sheepish grin.

“Ok, that’s fair,” she conceded, “I guess I still need a bit of a pick me up.”

Laf gasped, a hopeful look on their face.

Laura looked over, giggling at how much they looked like an expectant puppy. “Okay, quit it with the stupid grin; Kirsch is gonna complain about you hornin’ in on his turf. Go ahead.”

Laf jumped over to the coffee machine and double checked everything before flipping the switch, filling the room with the familiar bubbling sounds. However, after a few moments, it was clear the machine was struggling a little with whatever Laf had done.

“Uh, what’s it doing, Laf?” asked Laura

“It’s fine. I do this all the time with mine and Perry’s.”

Carmilla walked up to the machine, eyeing it with concern. “Laf, you break this thing and I am throwing you in the lake… from here.”

“Seriously, it’s fine,” defended Laf, “the brew will just be a bit strong.”

“How strong?” asked Laura warily.

“Well… let me put it this way… I tried Mel’s coffee once… and liked it.”

“Precious nectar!” exclaimed Danny, rushing up to watch the distressingly thick brew slowly drip into the carafe. She inhaled the aroma deeply, already perking up, “wow, you know it’s made right when the fumes wake you up. How on earth did you convince  _ Mel, _ of all people, to part with the technique? She swore she’d only pass it onto a daughter or take it to her grave.”

“I didn’t. She nearly brained me with a ladle when she learned I snuck a cup. It took me years, and no few coffee makers, to come up with an analogue.”

“Oh man, you have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that,” said Danny, returning to the bowl she’d been whisking, “that stuff was heaven sent for morning patrols after all nighters.”

“Well, I hope this helps,” said Laf, “I’ve still never gotten it quite right, so it might not have the same kick.” They grabbed the carafe, pouring a cup of brew so dark, it seemed to absorb light, which they offered to Danny.

Danny poured out her mixture into a pie plate before accepting the mug with a smile. She took a sip, smacking her lips for a moment before she jolted, becoming visibly covered in goosebumps.

“Wow, that’s close… it’s just missing…” Tapping her chin with a finger, she grabbed the nutmeg that she’d set aside from the french toast, tapping a bit of the brown powder into the mug. She took another experimental sip, smiling satisfactorily. “Here, try this.”

Accepting the coffee back, Laf took a sip, immediately looking at the brew in surprise before getting hit by the same jolt as Danny. “That’s it! How’d you know? I thought you said Mel didn’t share the recipe.”

“She didn’t share the technique, but she made it everyday,” replied Danny, “we all knew what went into it, we just didn’t know what witchcraft Mel used to, well, do that.” She pointed at the goosebumps on Laf’s arm.

Carmilla peered into the mug with concern. “Witchcraft? Is this stuff safe?”

“Figurative witchcraft, Carm. I think…” Danny looked to Laf. “It is figurative, right.”

“Oh yeah, at least in my case. If Mel had more… Silas-esque means, that’s for her to know.”

“And hopefully for us to never find out,” said Laura, watching with concern as Laf poured another mug, “or for Mel to never find us out.”

“Eh, I haven’t talked to her since graduating. I wouldn’t worry about it. You want some?”

Laura kept her hands clear of the proffered mug. “Um… no thanks.”

“Carm?”

“Eh, sure. What’s the point of immortality if you don’t gamble it once in a while?”

“Carm!” scolded Laura. 

Carmilla just cackled before taking a sip. “Huh, I could get used to this.” She walked to the fridge to get some blood.

“Alright, we’ve got caffeine. Now we need nourishment!” declared Danny, flicking the stove on and digging out a spatula.

“Ah, ah, ah,” said Laura, “I don’t care how awake that concoction makes you feel. Now you’re just tired  _ and _ jittery. Go drink your coffee, I’ll cook.”

Danny spun the spatula in her hand, presenting Laura the handle. “As you wish.”

Laura smiled as they shared a smirk. Danny kissed her on the cheek as she went to sit down.

“So, Madame dark-circles,” said Laf, “did you at least get your marking done or was this whole venture in vain?”

“No, I finished. At four AM, but finished nonetheless. All I have to do enter the grades onto the school server.”

“Not even that,” said Laura, tossing in the first pieces with a hiss, “I put them up for you before Laf got here. All that’s on your agenda today is cuddles, movies and a nap.”

“Alright, I can live with that,” said Danny, looking impressed, “when do we start?”

“Right after breakfast,” said Laura with a flip of the toast.

x-x-x

“I shoulda known you'd pick that one,” said Laf as Laura slipped the disc into the player, “the moment she said it.”

“What can we say?” said Carmilla, “it’s the kind of connection that comes with twue wove.”

Laf gaped at the vampire. “In all the time that I’ve known you, I’ve never thought I’d see you quoting along, dead girl.”

“Well fortunately, Carm here is only  _ mostly  _ dead,” chimed in Danny as she wrapped an arm around Carmilla.

“Ok, I walked into that one, I’ll admit. But stop it now, I mean it.”

“Anybody want a peanut?”

Laf rounded on Laura to find her holding out a bowl of nuts, a smug smile on her face. They opened their mouth to say something before simply taking the bowl and popping a few into their mouth.

Laura chuckled as she burrowed her way under Danny’s free arm. She started the movie before dropping the remote and taking Carmilla’s free hand in Danny’s lap. 

It was about a quarter of the way through when Laura looked up to notice Danny was fast asleep, her head resting on Carmilla’s.

“Psst, Laf. Looks like the magic brew has met its match.”

Laf glanced over. “Inconceivable!”

“You keep using that word,” quoted Carmilla, “I do not think it means what you think it means.”

Laf chuckled. “Ok, how bout ‘interesting’?”

“That works.”

“I suppose caffeine can only do so much, though this is probably better for her, honestly.”

“I agree,” said Laura, “now hush. Let her sleep.” 

She rested her head on Danny’s chest as Danny’s arm unconsciously tightened around her. Satisfied that she wouldn’t wake, Laura returned her attention to the movie and one of the classic blunders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not pictured here, Mel reducing an espresso machine to its component parts in a fit of seemingly spontaneous rage cause she can sense the recipe's been cracked.
> 
> Hope you all liked this one.


	68. Eating Out of Sorts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laf and Perry make their first trip out for dinner as a family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heads up, this chapter includes instances of misogyny and homophobia.

“Y’know what?” said Laf.

“What?” asked Perry from where she was sitting on the floor, making faces at Sky as she lay on the floor, babbling happily.

“I’m in the mood for burgers.”

“Hamburgers sound good for dinner,” replied Perry, not looking up, “I think we have ground beef in the freezer and fixin’s in the fridge. You might have to run out for buns though. I think I used the last ones for those sloppy joes last week.”

“Man, those were tasty, but we may as well have dipped Hazel directly into the sauce. I found ground beef behind her ears. Her ears, Perr!” exclaimed Laf.

“Though cleaning the kitchen was certainly fun!”

Laf smiled and rolled their eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetie. Now, did you want to run out and get those buns?”

“Actually Perr, I was thinking we could go out.”

Perry paused, her expression tightening. “I assume you're not talking about getting buns.”

“No. I was thinking just hitting the diner in town. I'm in the mood for a burger and shake.”

“Oh, ok. That sounds nice,” said Perry, “did you want to call Laura, Carmilla and Danny to see if they want to babysit for a couple hours?”

“Well no, I was thinking we'd take the girls with us. Y'know, a family dinner out.”

Perry looked down at Sky, worrying her lip. “Isn't it too soon for that? Sky's only a few weeks old.”

“Maybe for a  _ restaurant _ restaurant,” they said, “but the diner is really kid friendly. There's enough room on the tables to put her carry seat and they have a decent kids menu for Hazel. Sky'll probably just sleep the entire time anyways; you've been playing with her for a couple hours. That's a full day in baby time.”

Little Sky yawned as if to agree with their parent.

“Ok, that sounds like a nice change.” Perry leaned back, stretching out from the hunched position she'd been sitting in.

“Why don't you feed the munchkin while I go find Hazel and get her washed up, then I'll burp and change her before we head out.”

“Alright, that sounds like a good plan. I think Hazel's up in her room,” said Perry as she started to unbutton her shirt.

“You want me to grab the nursing pillow?”

“No, thank you,” said Perry as she cradled Sky, encouraging her to latch on, “I want to practice holding her without and —oh, there we go. Eat up, sweetie— I can move around a little this way.”

“Ok,” said Laf, starting up the stairs, “call if you need help.”

“Will do, sweetie.”

Laf walked up to Hazel's room where they found her in the middle of the floor, stacking a pyramid of building blocks. LaFontaine waited until she finished a layer before softly knocking on the door, getting her attention.

“Hey squirt, your mom and I thought we should go out for dinner, sound good to you?”

“Yeah!” Hazel got up and scrambled over to Laf.

“Alright, clean up your blocks and then go wash your hands, we'll be heading out in a few minutes.”

Hazel pouted. “Aww, Laffy. I'm not done.”

Laf looked at the stack, already about half Hazel's height with plenty blocks left to go. “Well…” they started before looking down at Hazel's hopeful expression and melting completely, “alright, but when you're done your building, you have to clean them right up. Promise?”

“I promise!”

“Good. Now go wash up.”

“Ok!” said Hazel cheerily as she scampered off down the hallway.

Laf smiled before returning downstairs where they found Perry with Sky on her shoulder, gently patting her back.

“Hey, I said I'd take care of that,” they said, moving up and wrapping an arm around Perry's waist.

Perry just smiled. “I know, but she didn't want very much and it seemed silly to wait. Besides, I like doing this. It's comforting.” There was a tiny burp. Perry cradled Sky, using the towel from her shoulder to wipe up the little bit of spit-up from Sky's face. “If a little gross.”

LaFontaine laughed. “Well, I can't disagree on either count. Lemme go change her and then we can get moving.”

Laf eased Sky out of Perry's arms and took her upstairs to the nursery, cooing as they carted their daughter away.

Several minutes later, Perry was helping Hazel get on her jacket and shoes as Laf came in with Sky in a fresh onesie and began fastening her into her carry seat.

“You just didn't want to make that easy on me, did you little one? No you didn't,” Laf said happily, touching their forehead to Sky’s.

“Really dirty diaper?”

“No, just a bit damp, but little miss here decided that that was too easy and decided some target practice was in order.”

Perry winced with a giggle. “Did she get you?”

“No, luckily. I was able to use the old diaper as a shield just in time,” said Laf, buckling Sky in with a tickle, “you think it's a good sign or a bad one that I'm this good at dodging already?”

“Probably neither. You've been building your reflexes from dodging igniting experiments for years, love. A bit of pee doesn't really present much of a challenge.”

“Huh, mad science as preparation for parenting. I like it.” They snapped the handle up into place and hoisted the seat. “Alright, we ready?”

“Yeah!” chirped Hazel as she hopped up.

“Well let's get going then,” said Perry. She shouldered the diaper bag as she opened the door for her family before locking it behind them.

x-x-x

The diner was relatively quiet when the family walked in, with only about half the tables full.

“Go ahead and sit wherever you like, I'll bring you some menus in a moment,” said the woman behind the counter as she loaded herself up with plates to go out.

“Thank you,” Perry sing-songed as they made their way to an empty booth.

With a grunt, Laf hefted the carrier onto the table, pushing it all the way back to where the table met the window while Perry helped Hazel slide into the seat. Sky was fast asleep, despite the relative noise of the restaurant.

“Hey there, folks,” said the waiter as she came up with a pair of menus and a kids sheet with some crayons, “how's your night going?”

“Pretty good, yours?” said Laf.

“Not bad, bit quiet for my liking, but it's relaxing at least.” She shrugged. “Can I get you anything to drink while you look at the menus?”

“Yeah, can I get a strawberry shake?” said Laf.

“And a blueberry one for me,” said Perry.

“Excellent and for the little one?”

“I wanna milkshake too!” Hazel said.

The waiter hesitated, looking questioningly at Perry and Laf. 

“I think a kid sized one would be alright,” said Perry, getting a note of agreement from Laf, “what flavour do you want?” 

“Chocolate!”

“Okay, a kids chocolate shake for her,” said Perry.

The waiter leaned in, lowering her voice. “We make a chocolate smoothie with banana. It's got a little less sugar, but still really chocolatey. Would you like me to maybe make one of those instead?”

Laf and Perry exchanged another glance.

“Thanks, but we'll stick with the milkshake. A small one will be fine,” said Laf.

“Excellent, I can appreciate that,” she said, “I'll be back with your drinks in a few minutes.”

“I don't know if I like her,” said Laf after he'd left, “we can let our daughter have milkshakes if we want.”

“I wouldn't hold it against her,” said Perry, “I think she was just trying to be helpful. I actually didn't know they did smoothies, that'll be good to know for future.”

“I suppose,” said Laf, obviously not entirely convinced as they lifted the menu.

Perry smiled sadly before looking over her own menu.

LaFontaine quickly came to a decision and put their menu down. Quickly checking on Sky, they looked over at where Hazel was quietly scribbling on her menu. “Hazel, do you know what you want to eat?”

“Uh-huh, that one,” she said, pointing to the chicken strips, which she had circled in red, before returning to filling in the cartoon clown entirely in with black.

“Very decisive, I like that.”

“Alrighty,” said the server as she returned, “three milkshakes. Strawberry, blueberry and the kids chocolate for you.” She slid the small glass across the table where Hazel fell on it almost instantly.

Perry coughed, nudging Hazel. “What do we say?”

“Thank you!” she said happily before returning to the treat.

“You're welcome,” she said, “you ready to order?”

“Yeah, I’ll get a cheeseburger with a caesar,” said Laf, before pointing at Hazel, “and she wants the kids chicken strips and fries.”

“Excellent, that comes with honey mustard sauce. Is that okay, hon?”

“Yup!” said Hazel not looking up from her colouring. 

“Hazel,” said Perry with a warning tone, “manners.”

Hazel snapped out of her focus. “Yes, please.”

“Thank you, sweetie,” said Perry, patting Hazel on the shoulder before turning to the waiter, “I'll have the Humpty bacon burger, with a soft cooked yolk, and onion rings, please.”

“Very good choice, I'll go put those in.”

“Thank you!”

“Have I ever mentioned how I adore that you don't do things by halves?” said Laf.

“Well, if we're going to the trouble of eating out, may as well make it interesting,” she said with a smile.

It was then that Sky woke up and began fussing in her seat. LaFontaine immediately unbuckled her and pulled her out, cradling her gently. 

“Aw, what's wrong, Munchkin?” they said, “I don't smell anything, so I don't think you need a change.”

Perry pursed her lips in thought. “She probably wants the rest of her dinner. Her hunger finally beat out her sleepiness.” She thought for a minute before shrugging. “Well, there's nothing else for it. Can you grab that smock from the diaper bag? This is a good a time as any to try it out.”

“Sure,” they said, using their free hand to dig the garment from the side pocket, handing it off to Perry, which she wrapped around her shoulders, covering her down to her stomach.

Taking Sky from Laf, Perry moved the infant underneath the smock and with a little maneuvering, managed to get situated so she could feed. “Well, that wasn't too bad and boy, you're certainly hungry now.”

“Mommy? Did my other Mommy feed me like that?” asked Hazel curiously. 

Perry and Laf shared a concerned look. They didn't know anything about where Hazel came from before she was in the system, leaving them wishing they had more answers for the inevitable questions the future would bring.

“I don't know, sweetie,” said Perry, “most mommies do, so probably.”

The answer seemed to be enough for Hazel who simply said “okay,” before returning to her colouring. The cartoon had been nearly entirely consumed by the meticulously coloured-in black shadow.

“Excuse me,” came a gruff voice from beside them, drawing their attention. A man in a fairly nice shirt and slacks was standing beside their table, looking at Perry sternly. “Do you mind? I'm trying to eat!” He gestured to the cloaked form of the infant under Perry's smock.

Both Laf and Perry were taken aback by the man's rude manner, though Perry recovered quickly, giving the man a pleasant smile that was belied by a hard edge to her gaze.

“No, we don't mind at all.” Her smile turned predatory. “Go right ahead and eat.”

His head jerked back in surprise and he sneered at her. “Very funny. I don't know where you get off. It's bad enough that people like _you_ go out in public, but at least have the decency to do that _”_ —he pointed at her chest—”behind closed doors.”

Perry's expression by now could be best described as imperious, like she were imagining how best to vivisect this impudent worm. Laf, for their part, was seething. They were bright red and shaking with rage, barely able to keep from jumping out of the booth to start pummeling him. Only Hazel, who looked mostly just confused, kept them from jumping him.

“Excuse me, sir,” asked their server brusquely as she strode up, “what seems to be the problem here?”

“I'll tell you what the problem is,” yelled the man, drawing the attention of most of the restaurant, “this perverted woman is being completely indecent!”

She barely glanced at Perry before rounding back on him. “You're joking, right? She is perfectly covered. And furthermore, breastfeeding mothers are perfectly welcome to do so in this establishment, whether they want to cover themselves or not.”

The man turned purple with rage. “How dare you! I demand to speak to the manager!”

The server grinned fiercely, making the man falter, while around the diner, other staff could be heard gleefully cackling.

“Did he ask for the manager?”

“Oh, he wants to see the manager!”

She looked him dead in the eye, her grin becoming maniacal. “I  _ am _ the manager.”

Every shred of confidence the man had had a moment before was gone as he tried regather himself to finish his tirade. “A-a-alright. If you're the manager, I demand you do something about this. I-I-I refuse to eat in the same restaurant as that.”

“Well,  _ that _ is something I can help with sir,” she said as she walked to the counter and grabbed a take-away container, which she took over to his table and upended the contents of his mostly untouched plate into it. Closing the lid, she shoved it into his hands. “There we go, you don't have to eat here now… or ever again for that matter.”

He stood unmoving, his expression somewhere between enraged and bewildered. He sputtered unintelligibly a as as he tried to form a sentence.

“Perhaps I wasn't clear.” She took him by the collar and frog-marched him out the door. “Leave.” And with that, she shut the door behind her as the diner broke into applause.

“Okay, I was wrong before. I really like her,” said Laf with a smile.

“As do I,” said Perry, pulling open her collar to check on Sky, “and you're completely fine. Not a care in the world.”

“You okay, Hazel?”

“Yeah. Why was he so angry?”

“Some people think that breasts have to stay covered at all times and that not doing that to feed a baby is wrong.”

Hazel thought on that for a moment. “That's dumb. Babies are always hungry.”

Laf chuckled. “That they are. We got a smart one here, Perr.”

“We do indeed.”

“Hey, I just wanted to check on you guys,” said their server, “I'm so sorry about that.”

Perry waved her off. “Not your fault. There's always going to be people like that.”

“I suppose, but doesn't make it any more pleasant though,” she said regretfully, “are you sure you're okay? I can make your orders to go, in a more meticulous fashion I assure you, if you guys aren't feeling safe.”

Laf and Perry shared another glance, with a warm smile this time.

“We appreciate the thought,” said Laf, sharing the smile with the manager, “we feel like we're in safe hands here.”

“Well, of that much I can assure you,” she said, “lemme go check on your food, it should only be another couple minutes.”

“Thank you,” said Perry before checking on Sky again, chuckling at the sight, “done her meal then out like a light again.” She pulled Sky back out from under the smock, handing her to Laf to get back into the seat.

“Done!” said Hazel, holding up the sheet. The silhouette of a clown now stood on the white paper. On the tabletop, last the black crayon was rubbed flat and noticeably shorter than when she'd started.

“Very good, Hazel,” said Laf, “so why'd you use all black?”

Hazel shrugged. “Cause.”

“Of course.” Laf chuckled.

“Alright,” said their waiter, arms laden with plates, “who had the chicken strips?”

x-x-x

“Well that went… relatively well, don't you think?” said Perry as she unbuckled Sky from her seat. 

“I'd say so, if only as confirming a place where we can take Sky reliably,” said Laf, helping Hazel squirm out of her jacket.

Once she had her shoes and jacket off, Hazel was off to her bedroom like a shot.

“Remember to clean up after yourself,” Laf called after her.

“Yes, Laffy!”

“I think we can count the diner as a fair bit more than ‘reliable’,” said Perry, “but yes, you're right, I think this was a successful experiment. The worst happened and, with help, we were able to handle it.”

“Not to mention  _ she _ was able to handle it,” Laf said, pointing at Sky, “this is one chill baby.”

“I suppose to a baby, nothing outside of eat, sleep, poop has much relevance. Ignorance and bigotry just aren't relevant.”

“Ironic, given the typical maturity level of the usual offenders.”

Perry chuckled softly. “I suppose you're right.”

They moved into the house and began to settle down when Sky began to cry and a familiar odor became noticeable.

Perry smiled. “Well, I suppose we were lucky to get through dinner with just two out of three.”

“Well, I'd have rather dealt with hers than his, but yeah,” said Laf, “here, I'll take her.”

“Thanks, honey.” Perry let Laf take Sky from her arms. “Oh and LaFontaine? Great idea for dinner.”

Laf smiled. “I'm glad you liked it,” they said as they walked upstairs to change their daughter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, did this ever end up in a different place than I'd intended. I wanted to write Hazel running amok (not causing trouble, just being an energetic toddler) after having lunch with some friends and their bored two-year-old, but as often occurs, Tumblr happened and I found one of my favourite soapboxes.
> 
> The manager bit many will no doubt recognize as lifted from the comic by ojiisanholic, which is in turn inspired by a post facingthewaves. I'd love to be able to do that in real life, so I'm living vicariously through the page.
> 
> Sorry for the bit of rage induction, I hope you all enjoyed this one otherwise.


	69. Lauris Lane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reporter's first real scoop

“Hello Kevin! How’s it going today?”

The office receptionist, as per usual, didn't look up from his work. His fingers were an absolute blur on the keyboard. “Very well, thank you, Ms. Hollis.”

Laura gave him a frustrated smile, which went completely unnoticed. She'd been trying to coax Kevin to use her first name since she'd started with the paper nearly a year ago.

Kevin continued, still not looking up, “you have one piece of mail and no messages.” He placed a single manila envelope on the countertop, his other hand not stopping for a second.

“Thanks Kevin.” She grabbed the envelope with a good natured shake of her head.

“Of course, Ms. Hollis. Enjoy your work day.”

Laura wandered into the cubicle maze, quickly finding her own set of four walls. She tossed the envelope into her inbox and pulled out her laptop, slotting it into its dock, bringing the monitor to life.

Tossing her jacket onto its hook, she energetically threw herself into her chair. “One, two, three…” She counted her spins, trying to best her record.

“Nine… Teeeeeeenn... dang, two short.”

“Hollis? Could I speak with you for a moment?”

Laura looked up at the man standing in the entrance to her cubicle like nothing had happened, though her cheeks were still tinted a little red at having been caught. “Of course, Mr. Grimsdottir. Was there an issue with my last article?”

“No, no. Your coverage of the quilt show was well researched, detailed, and surprisingly, interesting,” he told her with a wink.

“I'll take that as a comment on the subject matter and not the author,” Laura said wryly.

“As well you should,” he replied.

“So, if that's not the issue, to what do I owe the pleasure of a visit?” Laura asked, confusion evident in her face.

“Well, underneath your article in my inbox was this other bundle of paper,” he said, pulling out a batch of pages from where he'd been holding them behind the cubicle wall.

Laura’s stomach dropped. She whipped her head around, hoping he wasn't holding what she thought he was holding. However, her pile of research was missing from the corner she'd left it in… the same corner she'd set down her finished article while she'd gone for lunch yesterday.

“Ugh,” she groaned, “I'm sorry. That's some research for a side project I've been doing after hours. I didn't mean to bother you with that.”

“Quite the side project, Hollis,” he said, thumbing through the paperwork, “financials, environmental reports, witness accounts, takeover bids… of one of the biggest commercial agriculture groups in the state. Something like this could stir up a lot of trouble.”

“Yes sir. I know that,” stammered Laura, “I just kept hearing stories at the farmers’ market I covered a couple months ago about local farmers being bought up or driven out. There are rumours swirling of mysteriously damaged equipment, sick livestock and scared property owners. I thought maybe if I could find out what was happening, we could shed some light on what’s going on and maybe help out the community.”

Mr. Grimsdottir slowly kept flipping through the research package, eyeing each page. “Keen Clover farms are one of the biggest farming conglomerate in the state, to say nothing of the county. They are a huge supplier of some of our biggest advertisers.”

“I know, and that’s why I’m being so careful with my research and keeping it to myself. But, that’s also why it would make such a huge impression if we broke this.”

Grimsdottir flipped the stack back shut, looking up at Laura with a neutral expression. “Hollis, this…” he said, holding up the papers, “is not something you should be spending your time on.”

Laura's expression became hard as she schooled her features, trying not to let her anger get the best of her. Taking a breath, she looked Mr. Grimsdottir in the eyes, ready to rebut. 

He forestalled her, however, with a raised finger. “Which is to say, this is not something you should be spending your  _ personal _ time on. This is now your focus.” He held out the package of papers.

Laura blinked in surprise as she took them. “Uh, I don't know what to say. Thank you.”

“Well, you're welcome… though you may feel like taking back that thanks before too long,” he said with a chuckle, “your first big scoop is exciting, but it's also often a rough lesson in journalism. If you’re not careful, it can be like facing a pack of wolves.”

Laura grinned. “Somehow, I think I’d be able to handle that.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Good luck.”

“Thanks,” said Laura, her attention turning to the envelope in her tray, “well, I guess I don’t have to wait for lunch to read you.” She slid her finger up under the flap, tearing open the envelope and pulling out the contents. She glanced over the page before her eyes went wide and she ran out of her cubicle, barely remembering to grab her jacket on the way. She bolted past Mr. Grimsdottir in the cubicle row. “Heyfollowingaleadbebacklaterbye!”

He watched as she rushed past Kevin’s desk, nearly wiping out on the polished floor, before disappearing into the stairwell. He shook his head ruefully and chuckled. She’d learn.

x-x-x

“I’m home,” came Laura’s tired call through the house.

Carmilla levered herself off of the couch, walking through the house to greet her wife. “I’m so glad you’re home. I’ve been so…” She trailed off into silence.

There in the mud room stood Laura covered head to toe in muck. She was in the process of peeling away layers of clothing, depositing each item into the laundry sink.

“Bad day?” asked Carmilla, crossing her arms as she leaned against the doorframe.

Laura looked up at her, grimacing as the pulled her t-shirt over her head with an awful wet sound. “Oddly enough, no. It went pretty well.” She was smiling as she finally got the shirt past her face.

“This is pretty well?” asked Carmilla, gesturing up and down.

“Well, I suppose this is not the best result,” she said as she struggled to work her jeans down her legs, “but I managed to get another solid piece of evidence, I just had to lie low for a little while.” Laura reached behind herself to unhook her bra when she noticed Carmilla’s gaze darkening as she licked her lips. “Easy there lady killer. I know what you’re thinking but this isn’t mud.”

Carmilla noticeably snapped out of her trance, a look of surprised disgust crossing her face as she unconsciously took a step back. “Where were you hiding?”

“You don’t wanna know. Just somewhere no one would expect to be overheard making threats of erroneous inspections from.”

“Wow, from start to ‘Predator’ in only two weeks, should I be expecting a ghillie suit in the mail, perhaps? Cables and a harness to defeat pressure sensors?”

“Carm, it’s not like I planned it. I just needed a hiding spot, quick. Though a ghillie suit might actually be useful.” Laura paused, considering the option.

“Alright, you can fantasize about super journalist spy gear while you shower. I’ll take care of this mess.”

“Oh you don’t have to, I can…”

“Don’t worry about it, go wash up.”

“Thanks Carm,” said Laura, leaning in to kiss Carmilla on the cheek before stopping short, the two sharing an ‘oops’ glance. With a giggle, she scampered upstairs to shower off.

x-x-x

This was it for Laura. She was trapped, with no way out. She could feel herself fading… fading…

“So I says to Mabel, I says…”

Laura snapped back to focus, looking across the cafe table at her lunch companion. “Sorry Jeana, I must’ve gotten distracted, what was that?”

“You’ve been distracted a lot lately,” said Jeana, eating a spoonful of soup, “I was saying that Lauren down in printing has taken on a new protege. Some new girl… I forget her name… Christina? Kirsten? It doesn’t matter. But rumour has it she attended Stanford, so what’s a Stanford girl doing at some small paper and what about…”

Laura found her attention wandering again from the meaningless gossip as she nibbled at her sandwich. 

“Laura Hollis?”

Laura and Jeana looked up at a woman in a severe business suit looming over their table.

“I am.”

“Miss Hollis. My name is—”

“Samantha Harrod,” interrupted Laura, as she folded her hands on the table, “representing Keen Clover Incorporated.”

Harrod looked down her nose at Laura with clear irritation. It was obvious she was unaccustomed to being on the back foot. “Yes. Well, I guess we can skip the pleasantries and get right to it. My employer has noticed your… close interest in their business dealings.”

“Have they now?” said Laura calmly, “I have to say, it took longer than I expected. Not bad for a first big story, eh Jeana?”

Jeana stayed absolutely frozen, like a rabbit trying not to draw the attention of a hunting predator. She glared at Laura for including her.

Harrod glanced at Jeana disdainfully before looking back to Laura. “Yes, well, now that my employer is aware of your… story… they are concerned that you may intend to paint their firm in a less-than-reputable light.”

Laura smiled pleasantly. “It feels so wonderful to have a such important business take an interest in my work, however it would go completely against my integrity as a writer to reveal the fruits of my labours before it was finished. If you’d like to read it, you’ll just have to buy a copy when it goes to print… or check the online edition I suppose, but I intend to go for the dead tree edition. It’s harder to frame a web page.”

“Miss Hollis, I don’t think you quite understand the gravity of your situation,” Harrod said, notably starting to lose her temper, “if you think we’ll stand by while your little rag prints libelous articles, you are sorely mistaken. We have the means to make you wither on the vine, if we desire. And I’m not simply referring to the paper. A little word here, a changed number there and even the most studiously paid mortgage can be foreclosed upon.”

Laura’s smile remained, but her gaze hardened. “No, I don’t think  _ you _ quite understand the gravity of the situation. I don’t look kindly upon threats, and neither do the public.” She turned over her folded hands, revealing a recording phone.

Harrod paled, stammering unintelligibly.

“I think it’s best you leave,” suggested Laura, “before you make my article even more interesting.”

Looking around in a disarrayed panic, she quickly left the cafe patio and strode off down the street.

Laura waited until she was out of sight before slumping back in her chair. “Fezzes and Bowties, that was terrifying.”

Jeana looked at Laura with disbelief. “That was you terrified?”

“Go get a degree at Silas. It’ll do wonders for your composure skills.”

“No thanks, I stick to gossip thanks.”

“Good idea, much safer bet.”

“What did she mean she’ll make the paper wither?”

“Probably try to make our advertisers dump us, especially after we put the article up. She wasn’t far off on the libelous bit, we’ve just got proof to back it up.”

It was Jeana’s turn to grin. “Don’t go worrying too much about that.”

“Why?”

“I’m not head of advertising because I’m a pretty face. I mean, it helps, but that’s not important. Our sponsors are hardly grudging and I make sure they know which way the wind is blowing. It won’t be a problem.”

Laura grinned brilliantly. “Y’know, I think we might just pull this one off.”

“I’ll drink to that,” said Jeana, clinking her water glass with Laura’s.

The both smiled at each other before Laura looked at her watch. “Wait, we were supposed to be back fifteen minutes ago.”

x-x-x

“Nice work, Hollis.”

Laura stopped her chair spinning to look at the Editor-in-chief once again standing in her cubicle entrance. “Not really, I only got to nine spins.”

He chuckled. “I meant your article.”

“Yes, of course. I knew that,” she said unconvincingly, “how are sales?”

“Great, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Keen Clover is reeling. They’re under investigation, their customers are leaving in droves, including our big sponsors, I tell you Jeana is a wizard.”

“I’ll let her know you said so.”

“Please do,” he said, “KCI has launched a defamation and libel lawsuit against us, of course, but your research is iron clad and I know Legal is salivating at the prospect of a nice stupid corporation to drag concessions out of. All in all Hollis, a pretty unqualified success.”

“Thank you Mr, Grimsdottir,” said Laura, “and actually, while I have you, I wanted to discuss another long term project I had in mind.” She handed him a new sheaf of papers.

“Is this what I think it is?”

“Probably.” Laura smirked.

“The Governor’s office?”

“Yep,” she said, her smile growing even more.

He grinned. “Something like this could stir up a lot of trouble.”

“I'm counting on it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, a little less rage inducing than last week's offering. I've been wanting to bring the newspaper crew back for a while now, they're kinda fun to play with.
> 
> I hope you all liked it!


	70. Head in the Clouds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flying with a kid can be tricky. Flying with three...

“Okay, do you have all your bags?”

Before waiting for an answer, Perry was already looking underneath the back seats, groping around for any small bits and bobs that the kids may have dropped. Danny did a quick tally of their luggage as Carmilla secured Mercy into her stroller.

“Looks like we've got everything,” Danny said cautiously, “all the luggage and carry-ons, including the diaper bag. One, two… and three kids,” she said, quickly grabbing the back of Charlie's jacket to stop her curiously wandering after a train of luggage carts being towed by.

Drix stood enamoured watching a jet take off from behind the terminal building.

“What's that Drix?” asked Danny.

“Is a plane!” 

“Very good. We’re gonna fly on one of those.”

“Fly!”

“And Laura's gonna pick you up at O'Hare?” asked Perry.

“Yeah, she wrapped up her interviews yesterday,” said Carmilla, tossing the diaper bag into the stroller's undercarriage, “so she's just killing time til our flight lands.”

“Well, that's nice,” said Perry, taking the luggage cart so Danny could wrangle Drix and Charlie, “even when you book and plan, I always find getting your own transportation from the airport to be incredibly taxing.”

“Apparently, the 'L’ train makes it pretty easy, according to Laura,” said Carmilla, “but I can't imagine trying to wrangle all our stuff  _ and  _ the kids on public transit.”

“Thanks for coming into the terminal with us, by the way, Perr,” said Danny, “it'll make things so much easier with the kids til we can ditch the suitcases.” She hitched Drix up on her hip and took Charlie's hand, leading the way across the lanes of traffic in front of the terminal. “Let us know how much parking is and we can pay you back.”

Perry waved them off. “Don't worry about it, I'm happy to help.”

“Well, at the very least, we'll have to have you three over for dinner as a thank you.”

“Now that sound lovely,” said Perry as they entered the airport, “do you still need to check in?”

“Nah,” said Carmilla, “we checked in online last night.”

“And managed to grab a whole row in the process,” Danny added cockily.

Carmilla rolled her eyes with a smile. “All we need to do is check our luggage and head for security.”

“And how long til your flight boards?” Perry checked her watch.

“About an hour and a half,” Carmilla said, looking at the check-in area, near deserted but for the waiting attendants, “though it looks like we won't need nearly that much time.”

Perry nodded reluctantly. “Looks like you'll be fine, though you're cutting it closer than I like, honestly.”

“Don't get us wrong,” said Danny, “if Laura didn't know things here so well, we'd be a little more cautious. We're certainly gonna give our return flight a little more wiggle room.”

“Plus, we’ve been watching the security line-ups since this morning,” said Carmilla, lifting up her phone from the stroller's cup holder in demonstration, “it's only about ten minutes to get through right now. Even with the kids, we should be alright.”

“Hello!” said an attendant brightly, stepping around her desk to help start unloading suitcases, “family vacation?”

“Yep,” said Danny, putting down Drix so she could pull out her phone with the reservation, “our wife just finished up some business in Chicago, so we're flying out to make a week of it.”

“Oh, I love Chicago. My girlfriend and I visit at least twice a year.”

“Twice a year?” asked Carmilla.

“Perk of the job,” she said, “flying domestically is dirt cheap.”

“Very niiiiice.” Carmilla's hand shot out, grabbing hold of Drix's arm as he ran towards the luggage conveyor.

“Ride!” he protested.

“No Drix, that's not for riding on,” said Carmilla, lifting him up, “unless we can check the kids? That could make life a bit simpler.”

The attendant didn't miss a beat as she applied luggage labels. “But of course. Our Kargo Kids program provides only the finest straw lined crates with fresh water dispensers for your children's comfort.”

“Well, now that is service,” said Danny.

It wasn't until they all saw Perry's horror struck face that everyone burst out laughing. Perry just rolled her eyes before smiling ruefully at them.

“Though on the subject,” said the attendant, “did you want check the stroller at the gate?”

“If we could,” said Danny, “we've got a bag to stuff it into once we're there.”

“Excellent.” She applied a label to the bag’s handle. “Just give it to the gate attendant and we'll make sure it's at the gate in Chicago.”

“Thanks, that's really helpful,” said Danny as Carmilla took the luggage cart forward, hefting bags onto the luggage belt a little too easily, though no one seemed to notice.

“And so I have your boarding passes here…”

Danny glanced in surprise at the five passes, holding up her phone. “Oh, I actually have…”

“I know, but going through security, I find families have a much easier time when they're not scrolling for everyone's individual pass. Sorry if I'm being overly presumptuous.”

“That's… actually really helpful. Thank you.” Danny took the passes from the counter.

The attendant simply smiled. “Of course! Enjoy your flight.”

The family made their way through the airport, past the assortment of shops and restaurants dominating the pre-security area.

“Well, I think this is as far as I can go,” said Perry, booping Charlie, whom she'd scooped up earlier, on the nose.

“Yep,” said Danny, taking Charlie and giving Perry a hug.

“Thanks for the ride,” said Carmilla, hugging Perry as well.

“Have a lovely time. Laf or I will be here next week to pick you up and… where's Hendrix?”

Danny and Carmilla looked around in a panic before spotting Drix up ahead of them. He was standing in front of a security agent, looking up at him. The agent was smiling back but was also visibly barring the path to the checkpoint.

Danny rolled her eyes. “And I think that's our cue to leave. Take it easy, Perr.” Danny turned quickly to go collect her son, Carmilla bringing the stroller along in her wake.

“Bye!” Perry called after them.

x-x-x

“Okay, that was relatively painless,” said Danny, cradling Mercy in the aisle as Carmilla got Drix and Charlie buckled in, a window seat each.

“So far. The challenge is yet to come,” said Carmilla, nodding at Mercy. The infant was awake, but was being quiet for now, looking curiously at the new surroundings.

“We'll just have to hope the tricks we read about will be effective.”

“Eh, if worse comes to worse, it’s a short flight and I can out-glare anyone who takes issue.”

“Carm, you can out-glare most birds of prey. I think you might end up scaring someone.”

“If they wanna try and complain about my kid, good.”

Danny chuckled as she sat down next to Charlie to get out of the aisle as the rest of the plane was loaded.

“Mommy? What are they doing down there?” asked Charlie.

Danny leaned over, looking at the workers out on the tarmac. “They are getting the plane ready to fly. Putting everyone’s suitcases in. Giving the plane gas to go.“

“Are our suitcases in there?” Charlie asked, pointing at the bundles of luggage being loaded.

“Yep, ours and everyone else’s.”

“Wow,” said Charlie. She kept looking, trying to see more, but her questions had ebbed for the moment.

Danny looked back across the aisle to where Drix was looking at the safety card, enthralled by the pictures, though Danny doubted he understood what they meant. Carmilla was leaned over, an arm around him as she pointed at the panels.

The small plane loaded quickly and they were soon rolling away from the gate and towards the runway. The flight safety demonstration was playing on the in-seat TVs, though Danny was only half paying attention to it as she secured Mercy into a sling across her chest.

“Do you need any assistance with her?”

Danny looked up to the pleasant smile of one of the flight attendants. “Thanks for asking, but I think I’ve got it and I’ve got my wife with me to help out too.” She nodded across the aisle where Carmilla was pulling out a lollipop for Drix. “Oh, right.” She dug into the diaper bag on the empty seat beside her and pulled out a lollipop which she unwrapped and gave to Charlie, who happily popped it into her mouth without question.

“You’ve done this before,” the flight attendant said, taking the empty wrappers from each of them.

“No, we just looked up everything we could when we decided that flying with three young kids seemed like a fantastic idea,” remarked Carmilla.

The attendant nodded. “Smart. I assume you’re going to try and nurse her during take-off and landing.”

“Yep. Freshly pumped and ready to go,” said Danny, pulling a baby bottle from the bag.

The PA crackled to life. “Flight attendants, please secure for take off.”

“Well, I have to go, but don’t hesitate to ask for anything during the flight.”

“We won’t thanks,” said Danny as she adjusted the sling to where she could comfortably give Mercy the bottle. She turned to Charlie, who’s attention was back outside the window. “This is my favourite part. Get ready.”

Charlie made a noise of excitement as the whine of the engines crescendoed and the plane leapt forward, pressing them all back into their seats and before long, with a very slight lilt of weightlessness, the jetliner lifted from the ground, ascending quickly. Charlie’s face was pressed right up against the plexiglass as she strained to make out every detail of the rapidly retreating ground. Across the plane, Drix was similarly transfixed.

Mercy, however, was less happy. She had spit out her bottle and the her face was scrunched up in irritation at the unusual noise and sensations.

“C’mon honey,” coaxed Danny, “you need to drink or your ears are gonna start to hurt.”

Mercy fussed a little more, but eventually accepted the bottle again, quieting down as she did so.

“Why?” asked Charlie curiously, peering into the bundle at her little sister.

“As we go up into the sky, the pressure changes and our ears are sensitive to that,” explained Danny, “but we can relieve the pressure with our mouth and nose. It’s why you and Drix have suckers and why sucking on a bottle should help Mercy.”

“This keeps my ears from hurting,” asked Charlie, pulling out the candy to look at it.

“It should, so long as you suck on it and don’t chew it,” said Danny, “but if your ears start to hurt anyway, try yawning.”

“Ok!” she said, returning her attention to the patchwork landscape below.

The flight continued mostly quietly. Charlie’s interest remained fixed out the window while Drix was watching something colourful that Carmilla had found for him on the TV. Carmilla herself was absorbed into a book while Danny watched TV, Mercy dozing in the sling.

“Would you like something to drink?” another flight attendant asked as they pulled up the cart.

“Do you want some juice, Charlie?”

“Yes, please. Apple!”

“One apple juice coming up,” he said, filling a small cup and handing it to Danny, who unlatched Charlie’s tray and put the cup down. Politely he coughed, holding up a small pack of cookies where only Danny could see it, glancing towards Charlie.

Danny smiled. “Yes, thank you, though I appreciate the discretion.”

“You only get a child’s ‘yes’ and a parent’s ‘no’ once before you realize doing that in close quarters can be hazardous.”

Danny winced sympathetically. “Ooh, yeah.”

“Anything for yourself?”

“A sparkling water would be nice, and no snack, thank you.”

“One sparkling water,” he said, pouring out a tiny glass bottle into a cup for her.

He waited until his compatriot attended to Carmilla and Drix before pushing the cart further along, leaving the family to their refreshments. However, the peace didn’t last long as Mercy woke up and began fussing again.

“Is she dirty?” asked Carmilla, moving the diaper bag so she could sit next to Danny.

Danny quickly checked. “No, she’s fine and she’s fed. The environment is likely just making her cranky.”

Carmilla frowned. “Would another bottle help?”

“I don’t think so. She’d be outright crying if her ears were bothering her and I don’t want to risk her not drinking during the descent, otherwise she really will be hurting.”

Carmilla reached into the sling and pulled Mercy out. “Oh my poor sweetling, what’s wrong?”

She bounced Mercy gently, but she was still not happy.

It was then that the flight attendant from the beginning of the flight came up, kneeling to look over the back of the empty seat in front of them. “How’s she holding up?”

“We don’t think she’s hurting, but she’s not happy either.”

“Oh yeah, that’s pretty common. It’s really loud in here, even though we kinda gloss over it. I find distraction helps.”

“Like what?” asked Danny.

“Well…” She wiggled her fingers, gaining Mercy’s attention. She gave the infant a bright smile before ducking behind the seat. Mercy stared, open mouthed at the spot she had been in for a few seconds before she popped back out from behind the seat. “Peek-a-boo!”

Mercy gave a look of surprise, a quirk of a smile tugging at her mouth as the flight attendant ducked away again.

“Where’d she go, Mercy?” cooed Danny, tickling her daughter a little.

“Peek-a-boo!”

This time Mercy full on smiled, a giggle escaping from her. The flight attendant’s own grin grew in delight before she ducked again. They played the game for another few minutes, other passengers in the cabin around them notably smiling and cooing about how cute Mercy was.

The PA crackled again. “Good morning everyone. We are beginning our descent into Chicago O’Hare airport. The weather today is a sunny and pleasant sixty-two degrees with just a hint of breeze. We’re about ten minutes ahead of schedule, so we’ll have you there in plenty of time for any connections or just get you to see the windy city that much faster.”

“Well, duty calls,” she said as she stood back into the aisle.

“Thank you so much,” said Danny as Carmilla helped her get Mercy back into the sling.

“My pleasure,” she said before heading towards the back.

Carmilla buckled herself back in beside Drix as Danny made sure Charlie’s tray table was back up. Once she was satisfied they were ready, Danny pulled out another bottle, with water this time.

“Okay, I know it’s only been a bit over an hour since the last one, but I need you to drink this so you feel better. Ok, Merc? Please.”

It took a few minutes as the plane began to noticeably descend before Mercy took the nipple, taking obvious comfort from the motion.

“Mommy, my ears hurt,” said Charlie.

Danny could kick herself for forgetting to give Charlie another sucker. Glancing over, the noticed Carmilla had remembered for Drix, which was a relief since helping him would have been harder.

“Okay sweetie,” said Danny, “remember what I said? Try yawning to make your ears pop.”

Charlie opened and closed her mouth a few times before an earnest yawn caught her. It was obvious the moment her ears popped when she twitched at the sensation.

“Better?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, here’s a new sucker. This should help for the rest of the way.”

“Thank you!”

“You’re welcome, sweetie.”

x-x-x

“Mommy!”

Charlie tore across the baggage claim and into Laura’s waiting arms.

“Hello, my girl! Did you have a good flight?”

“Yeah. It was really cool. The plane went really fast and we went really high and the ground was really neat and I saw clouds, they were all puffy.”

“So I’d take that to be positive,” said Carmilla dryly as their group caught up.

“Mommy,” said Drix, a little more subdued as Carmilla dropped his hand and he walked over to latch onto Laura.

“And how was she?” asked Laura, nodding to Mercy, fast asleep in her stroller once again.

“Very good,” said Danny.

“Helped that we had a magical flight attendant,” said Carmilla.

“Magical?”

“Obviously she knew about kids and flying, she was a ton of help. They all were actually, we need to fly this airline again.”

“Well, that’ll be easy. It’s the one I use for work, so I get points with them,” said Laura, spotting one of the family’s bags, lugging it off of the carousel.

“Well, no brainer then,” Carmilla said, hefting two more, drawing a few impressed looks.

“So what’s on the docket for today?” asked Danny, pointing out the last two bags to Carmilla, who nabbed them in short order.

“Not much, since even short flights can be draining.”

“‘Preciate it.”

“We’ll head back to the condo we’re renting and then I think a walk to and around Cloud Park.” Laura grabbed the luggage cart and started leading the way out of the terminal.

“Cloud Park?” asked Carmilla.

“The Bean,” said Laura.

“I think this is gonna be fun,” said Danny, “right Mercy?”

Mercy simply continued to sleep as they pushed out the front doors and into the sunshine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was inspired by an airline I flew with last month. There was a baby in the row behind me and the flight attendant went out of her way to help cheer the little one up when she wasn't happy. The 'Kargo Kids' bit was also inspired by one of their April Fools pranks from a few years back. I'd recommend to anyone checking out WestJet's series of joke commercials.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this one!


	71. Filling Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pumpkin pie makes for such a pleasant, seasonal treat...

“Well Miss Hollis… you seem to be a bit short of options?”

Laura edged back on her bed, struggling to keep an eager smile from creeping onto her face. The mattress dipped as Carmilla climbed up onto the end of the bed, slowly prowling towards Laura with a grace that betrayed her feline underpinnings.

Laura kept scooting backwards until she encountered something very solid and very warm behind her. A pair of hands snaked their way over her sides and onto her hips, pulling her back firmly so she was completely flush against the warmth. She could feel a pair of thumbs sneak up under her shirt, just above her waistline, softly stroking the smooth skin of her stomach.

“Oops, gotcha,” breathed Danny into her ear.

Laura’s heart felt like it was going to pound right out of her chest between Carmilla’s hands sliding up her thighs and Danny nibbling down her neck as her hands began sliding back up Laura’s sides, bringing her shirt with them.

Laura bit her lip in anticipation as Carmilla’s hand found the button of her jeans and—

The door slammed open and Perry ran in from the hallway. “Laura! I—” She froze as she finally realized what the occupants of the room were up to.

For many long seconds, silence filled the room as no-one seemed willing to break the trance that had fallen.

“Well, I warned you about knocking.” Carmilla shrugged as she popped Laura’s button with a snap of her fingers and moved to pull the zipper.

“Carmilla!” scolded Laura as she swatted Carmilla’s hands away and did her pants back up. 

Carmilla pouted at her sadly. 

Laura just rolled her eyes and kissed her on the cheek. “Later,” she said softly as she hopped out of the bed, turning to kiss Danny on the forehead for good measure. “What’s up. Perr?”

Hearing her name seemed to finally snap Perry out of it. “Oh… dear… yes. I’m sorry, but I kind of need your help.” Perry nervously shifted her weight from foot to foot.

“With what, Perr?” asked Danny, fanning herself with a book.

“Well, um, Lafontaine has been kind of…” Perry said, looking anxiously between them and the window, ”been kidnapped.” 

“What?” yelped Danny and Laura simultaneously.

“Well, I was in an autumny mood so I decided to bake a pumpkin pie.”

“Did you save any?” asked Carmilla from where she was now laying facedown on the bed.

“Well, I would have but you see… when Lafontaine tried to cut a slice… the pumpkin filling kind of… attacked them and then ran off… carrying them.”

A guffaw came from the bed, prompting the other three occupants of the room to turn.

“What?” asked Carmilla, “come on, that is funny.”

“Carm!” Laura scowled at her girlfriend.

“I’ll be honest, she’s not really wrong,” said Danny, “once we get Lafontaine back safe, I fully plan to never let them forget this. As far as I’m concerned, this is a new annual holiday.” She looked back at Perry, who looked like she was about to explode. “I said after. I still want to make sure they're okay. Y’know? Look back on this and laugh.”

“Oookay, well time’s a wastin’” interjected Laura, “you said it carried Laf off. Do you know where?”

“No, it just grabbed Lafontaine, threw the pastry knife into the wall and squidged out the door and down the corridor,” Perry sat down on the other bed, completely defeated, “I tried to go after it, but it just moved too fast to keep up.”

“Alright,” said Laura determinedly, “we can do this. Let's head back to the scene. We can look for clues and try to figure out where that thing might've taken them.”

“Sounds like fun, I'm in,” said Danny, putting on her shoes and tossing on her letterman jacket.

The three standees turned to look at Carmilla who hadn't moved from her spot on the bed. “Ugh, couldn't this wait until after we finished what we started? I mean the bio major is probably loving being held hostage by an eldritch dessert. They’re probably amusing themself right now trying to take a sample. They can hold out til we're done. We'll be eight… twelve hours at most. I'm sure they'll be fine.”

“Carm,” said Danny, “even if you could somehow convince us to stay behind, you really think we’d have all that much fun with Laura watching the door like a frightened meerkat?”

“Hey,” protested Laura to which Danny only stared at her, “okay fine. You’re right. All the more reason to go save our friend...  _ as quickly as possible. _ ”

Everyone stared at Laura incredulously.

“What? Just cause I wanna help doesn’t mean I’m any less wound up like a spring than Carm.”

“Well, so long as I’m not the only one who’s suffering,” said Carmilla, finally rolling off the bed to her feet, “let’s go get this over with.”

“Oh thank you, I really appreciate this.” Perry led the way out the door and up the stairs, towards the floor don’s suite.

“I accept gratitude in the form of baked goods,” said Carmilla, “as do these two, though they’re too polite to say so.”

Perry laughed. It had a nervous edge, but she relaxed visibly. “Telling me you like my baking is hardly impolite. That is one expression of gratitude I will do happily.” 

They reached Perry’s room and she opened the door, letting them all into the large living space, a studio size dorm room with enough room for a couch and small galley kitchen, dwarfing the tiny kitchenette of the regular dorms.

Danny let out an impressed whistle. “Wow, Perr. I always forget that being floor don comes with a few extra perks. Why don’t we hang out here more?”

“I haven’t a clue,” said Perry, “oh, would you mind taking off your shoes? and please don’t sit on the couch, I just dusted it.”

“There it is,” said Carmilla. Laura and Danny nodded reluctantly.

“Wait, Perry. You cleaned?” asked Laura.

“Yes, of course. I had company coming over.”

“Including the mess made by the pumpkin pie monster?”

“Well, yes. It left bits of pie crust everywhere and knocked over my table.”

“And cleaned up the evidence with it?”

“Well…” Perry paused, looking around the room with an expression of horror on her face, “yes, I did. Oh my goodness, what have I done?”

“Well, too bad. We did what we could,” said Carmilla, “guess we have no choice but to go back to the room and crawl into bed.” She started tugging Laura and Danny towards the door.

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Danny, tugging Carmilla back, “it’s fine. None of us are exactly Sherlock Holmes, I doubt we would’ve deduced anything beyond ‘yep, that’s a pie crust alright’. However, I’m less interested in the pie’s crust as the pie’s spices.”

“If you say you want a latte, I’m going back to the room without you.”

“No, but it’s a very distinctive smell…”

Carmilla lit up. “Oh I see where you’re going with this. That’ll be a lot faster than playing ‘whodunnit’. You want to do the honours, Red?”

Danny stretched and in moments shifted, leaving a large red wolf where Danny had been standing.

“Okay, following the scent trail is a good idea,” said Laura, where she’d been pushed up against the wall, “but a little warning to make room would be appreciated in future.”

Danny wuffed apologetically before sticking her nose to the floor and sniffing about. Very quickly, she winced, pulling her nose away from the floor and glaring at Perry.

“Sorry, I guess I went a little overboard with the pine cleaner.”

Danny rolled her eyes before moving out into the hall where she began to snuffle around once more. This time, something obviously caught her attention. Barking softly, she began heading for the stairs, everyone else in tow.

x-x-x

The trail led the group across the campus to the open door of the student cafeteria. Inside was what could only be described as a massacre.

Provided all the victims were pies.

“Wha...what happened in here?” Perry asked no one in particular, looking around the room at the bits of crust, whipped cream and fruit that seemed to be stuck to every visible surface.

“Dammit, it’s everywhere,” groused Danny as she shifted back, “I’ve lost the trail.”

“Dudes, you just missed the coolest thing!” said Kirsch, running up to them, covered head to toe in pie shrapnel. An empty pie tin sat upon his head with a slight jaunt.

“Was it, perhaps, some kind of pumpkin pie monster?” asked Laura, “possibly in possession of a contraband Lafontaine?”

Kirsch looked incredibly impressed at Laura’s quick deduction. “Tiny-bro, that was it exactly!”

“Okay, calm down there Beefcake, we know the what, but not the how,” drawled Carmilla, “why don’t you talk us through what happened here?”

“Oh my god, dude, like, it was just a normal afternoon snack time and I came in to get some of the epic pumpkin pie the caf staff know how to whip up. Seriously, you guys are amazing at it!” he called over to the shattered serving counter.

A mana bolt of some description was the only response. It glanced off the pie pan, knocking it to the opposite jaunt on his head.

“I was just about to dig in when this huge, amazing smelling blob broke through the doors over there and began knocking over anyone having pie. Although, you know what was really weird?”

Laura put a palm to her face. “It really says something about this school that we’re only  _ now _ getting to the weird bit. What was it, Kirsch?”

“It kept grabbing pieces of pie. Most of it, like the cherry or lemon merengue—

“Meringue,” corrected Laura reflexively.

“That’s what I said. It was smashing them anywhere it could, but the pumpkin slices? It looked like it was trying to talk to them or something. It kept getting angrier with each piece.”

“Probably just cause they were normal —or as close to normal as this place gets— pieces of pie. Nothing to talk back,” said Danny.

“As interesting as this is, what about Lafontaine?!” said Perry, nervously shifting from foot to foot.

“Oh yeah! Science-bro was like totally stuck on it’s back,” said Kirsch, “I tried to get them off, but they said to leave them alone. They were ‘collecting findings’.”

Perry stood agape.

“Called it,” said Carmilla, looking incredibly smug.

“Did it hurt anyone?” asked Danny.

Kirsch looked around the dining hall. “Naw, just a few bumps and bruises. I thought Professor Cochrane was bleeding, but it turned out to just be strawberry-rhubarb.”

Danny glanced at Perry, noting the relief that crossed her features. “Alright, did you see where it went? We still need to get Lafontaine back.”

“Yeah, it jumped over the counter into the kitchen and smashed it’s way out the back door there.” He pointed to a set of double doors hanging off their hinges.

“Great, let’s get going!” said Laura, making for the staff gate through the counter.

“Whoa there Cupcake,” said Carmilla, snatching Laura by the collar, “why don’t we head round? Our blob may not have caused any casualties but I doubt our esteemed lunch monsters will be so forgiving after having their kitchen torn up.”

Laura looked at the disgruntled expressions of said staff as they cleaned up the devastation. “Right, yeah. Okay, thanks Kirsch, we’ve got a scientist to save.”

“No prob little nerd! Good luck!”

The group headed out the exit at the far end of the dining hall and after a quick search around back, they found a literal trail of crumbs which got them back on course.

x-x-x

“The alchemy tower… great, this day just keeps getting better,” Carmilla deadpanned, looking up at the concrete structure.

“Well, this is making more sense at least… and it could be worse,” said Laura.

“How?”

“It could have been drawn to the Lustig.”

Carmilla shuddered. “Let’s pretend that was never a possibility and get back to this slightly less repugnant option.” She pushed open the door, holding so Danny could slip through, Laura and Perry following after.

Danny kept sniffing along up a spiral staircase until she came a nondescript door along the second-floor hallway. 

Laura took point this time, leading the way through the door. “The alchemy club’s lounge?”

The room was a fairly standard common room full of couches and tables. There was a large and rather lab-like kitchen dominating one end of the room, complete with erlenmeyer flasks, a fume hood and a contraption of glass tubes filled with what looked like coffee. Sitting at the counter beside said contraption, drinking from a mug as they scribbled on a piece of notepaper, was Lafontaine. They were covered nearly entirely in a thin layer of light brown goo.

“Lafontaine!” exclaimed Perry, running across the room.

“Oh, hey Perr!,” they said before holding up their hands, “whoa there, probably not the best time for hugs. I’m still really sticky.”

Perry paused for a moment before closing the gap anyways and wrapping her arms around them. “I don’t care. I’m just so glad you’re safe.” She took their face in her hands before bringing her lips to theirs. “I love you my wonderful”—she kissed their left cheek—”amazing”—right cheek—”reckless”—forehead—”weirdo.” She leaned in and caught their lips once more. 

Breaking away, she wiped the corner of her mouth, licking off the tip of her finger. “Not to mention, you’re delicious right now.”

Lafontaine blushed hard enough to be visible through the layer of pumpkin.

“Alright, we found them. The day is saved,” said Carmilla, “can we go now?”

“Wait, what about the pie monster?” said Danny, looking around the room. Carmilla buried her face in her hands.

“Oh, once it saw the alchemy kids, it dropped me and ran for them.” Laf pointed at a set of double doors on the far wall that they hadn’t noticed before.

Laura, Carmilla and Danny all looked at each other before walking over to the door and looking through the glass window. On the other side was one of the most bizarre sights any of them had ever seen.

In what appeared to be a large classroom without furniture, most of the alchemy students were gathered. Some had clipboards writing findings, some were adhered to the walls with huge masses of pumpkin, one was even stuck to the ceiling. However, all of them sported huge smiles as in the middle of the room, the club VP was playing fetch with the mass of pumpkin using what appeared to be a large acorn squash.

“Yeah, seems like it just wanted to get home.”

“Home?” said the three girls simultaneously, all rounding on Laf.

“Yeah. Makes sense, I mean I bought the pumpkin for Perry from them.”

“Lafontaine! You told me you got it from the market!”

“Yeah, the alchemy club’s autumn market fundraiser. I mean I know you’ve told me to stop buying things from them but it just looked like such a good pumpkin and it actually seemed fine. It wasn’t quivering or glowing or anything.”

“Lafontaine…”

“Alright, alright, no more alchemy club goods. Lemme just finish up these notes and we can get going.” They made a few final jots and pushed the paper into the middle of the counter, folding up a second identical sheet into their pocket.

“Ok good,” said Perry, “let’s get back cause we need a shower.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” said Laf, “you can hop in first.”

“Not what I said, dear heart.” Perry ran a finger along their jaw before sticking the tip into her mouth and licking it off, keeping eye contact with them the entire time.

“Yes, of course, let’s get back as quickly as possible, we need to get clean,” said Laf, setting a quick pace out the door and down the stairs.

“Finally!” exclaimed Carmilla as she hooked an arm around each of her girlfriend’s waists and followed along in Lafontaine and Perry’s wake.

Behind them, the sounds of squishy thumps and cheers of laughter echoed through the tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was inspired by a typo while chatting with Jessi. What was supposed to be baked goods became baked goo and the ideas just flowed from there. I love having Silas to jump back to to get these nutty ideas off the ground.


	72. What's My Age Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes irritating family can be so entertaining.

Hendrix sat silently in the treetops, completely still but for the barest impatient flick of his tail. He scanned the woods below, looking, listening, hoping to catch the barest flicker of movement. Somewhere down there was his prey, who in turn was searching for him. However, he had the upper hand, he simply had to remain vigilant and spotting them would be ea—

“Gotcha.”

Hendrix hung awkwardly in the treetops, flailing uselessly as his tail whipped around, trying to find him some sort of equilibrium. He glared at the branch above, grunting, growling, hoping he didn’t look as stupid as he thought he did. Up on the branch was his prey, who had turned the tables and snuck up on him.

“Y’know, I was hoping to surprise you a bit,” said Mercy, snapping pictures with her phone, “but this is just too good.”

Drix simply glared at her and groaned.

“I’d love to help you up, but hefting a 250 pound panther is a little out of my skillset. I’m pretty good up in trees, but I’m not that good.”

Drix wuffed in annoyance before shifting. His hands didn’t have quite as good purchase as his claws had, but Mercy quickly had a hold of him and hefted him back onto the tree limb.

“Dang it,” said Drix, “I was sure I’d lose you by jumping trees.”

“That doesn’t really work when you leave inch deep claw marks from where ever you push off from.” Mercy patted to the branch they were sitting on.

Drix looked down at the marks he’d left in the branch. “It’s not like I can help that.”

“Well then, you’ll just have to try and find a different method of hiding, won’t you?.” She smirked. “Maybe a swim in the lake to throw the trail?.”

“In March? The ice may have melted, but that water is gonna be freezing, fur or no fur.” Drix shuddered involuntarily.

“Well, if you're gonna give up so easily…”

Drix frowned. “Who said I was giving up?”

“Eeehn, the water's too cold. I can't help shredding trees. The sun moves if I try to take a twelve hour nap in it,” Mercy whined, the smug grin never leaving her face.

“I don't sound like that!” he protested.

“I don't sound like that,” she parroted back with the same cadence.

Drix put his face into his hand, rubbing his temples. “Seriously? I thought you were sixteen, not ten.”

She cocked her head. “Well, we are playing tag, aren’t we?”

His face went blank before slowly smiling. “I suppose you’re right.”

“I’m sorry, what was that?” said Mercy innocently, cupping her ear.

“I said you’re a brat.”

Mercy laughed. “Close enough.”

“So, my fellow ten year old,” said Drix, “how bout one more round then we go return to our dear sister?”

Mercy grinned diabolically. “Sounds like fun.”

x-x-x

Charlie was enjoying a late afternoon cuddle with her girlfriend on the couch.

The house was quiet, the window was open just a crack, bringing in the scent of a crisp, early spring day inside and she and Hazel had a soft blanket draped over themselves, so they could still stay snug and warm.

Charlie was contentedly reading a book while under her arm, Hazel had fallen fast asleep. Charlie was trying in vain to concentrate but every couple sentences, she found her attention straying back to Hazel. The look of utter peace, the gentle even breathing… the laser dot in the middle of her forehead.

Charlie’s face scrunched up in annoyance as she slowly turned her head to try and find the source. It took a few moments, but she finally spotted the flickering of a laser pointer from somewhere outside. Rolling her eyes, she turned her attention back to her book. However, focussing on the words turned out to be a gargantuan task with the little red light dancing in her peripheral vision. Looking back she found the light now squarely on the tip of Hazel’s nose.

Sighing quietly, Charlie got up as gently as she could, trying not to disturb her partner, though to little avail.

“Mmm…” said Hazel, not opening her eyes, “whatsit?”

“Nothing babe, go back to sleep. I’ll be back in a minute,” said Charlie, placing a kiss on Hazel’s forehead as she settled her comfortably on the cushions. Within moments, Hazel’s breathing steadied and she was asleep again. “Just have to go swat a couple of pests.”

Tiptoeing across the room and into the kitchen, Charlie opened the back door and strode out into the yard where she was met by two grinning idiots.

“Can I help you?” she asked.

“I don’t know, can she help us?” said Drix, looking at Mercy.

“Beats me. I suppose it would depend on what she wanted to help with,” Mercy replied.

“Which, of course, supposes there was a problem that could be helped with,” he said.

“Very true. Do you have such a problem?”

“No dear sister, I don’t. It’s a shame really.” He put a hand on his cheek. “How about yourself?”

“Why yes I…” She patted her back pocket before giving an overacted look of surprise. She dug her hand into her pocket before looking at the woods sadly. “Oh dear, it must’ve run off.”

Drix looked off in the same direction before turning back to Charlie, nodding regretfully. “Well, it appears you can’t help us. Pity.”

“Such a pity,” echoed Mercy.

Charlie stared at them a moment before simply turning and walking back into the house and quietly shut the door behind her.

Mercy watched her leave. “She didn’t ask if we could help her.”

“No, she didn’t,” he replied.

“You know, brother of mine,” said Mercy, “I just had a wonderful idea.”

“What is it, sister?”

“We should help her anyways.”

Drix lit up with a smile. “That we should… with what?”

She gestured with her open hand. “Why with her boredom, of course.”

“Oh, of course.”

From inside, Charlie had managed to cuddle back up with Hazel, but she was keeping a weather eye on those two, mischief was obviously on their mind. If she hadn’t been so comfy and content, she’d be a proud older sister.

Outside she watched as the the two walked towards the house, disappearing behind the deck as they approached the stairs. It took several seconds to realize, however, that they had not come up the stairs, leaving Charlie to simply wait.

She didn’t have to wait long however as she heard the garage door starting to open, the dull hum echoing through the house.

“Nice try kiddos,” she said quietly to herself.

Adjusting herself so she could watch the mudroom door, she kept her attention between there and the deck in case they decided to double back. She felt pretty pleased herself, you had to get up pretty early in the morning to outmaneuver Charlotte Holl—

“Aww, she looks so precious,” came Mercy’s voice from behind her.

Charlie had to bite her lip to keep from yelping in surprise. Apparently, her siblings were early risers. She turned slowly, intending to glare at them but found them watching Hazel sleep with contented smiles of their own.

“Ok, not so bored after all,” whispered Drix.

“I suppose not,” said Mercy.

“Y’know, whispering when you’re hovering two feet above me doesn’t really help the do-not-disturb factor,” said Hazel, cracking open one eye.

“Aw guys, you woke her up,” said Charlie.

“No, they didn’t. I’m afraid you did love,” said Hazel, sliding so she was sitting against Charlie, “you were tense.”

“Still our fault then,” said Drix.

“Speaking of, nicely done,” said Charlie, “front door while the garage was making noise?”

“Yup, which reminds me.” Drix jogged off to go close the garage door, returning soonafter.

“Well, as much fun as that was,” said Mercy, “I guess the mood is done now.”

“Oh, not necessarily,” commented Charlie, “we just need to take it to the next level.”

“Oh?” asked Drix, “how so?”

“Well…”

x-x-x

Carmilla hit the remote to close the garage door behind her as she dialed her phone, wedging it on her shoulder.

“Hey Cupcake, I just got home and I’m gonna get dinner started, any requests?”

She opened the door to the mudroom, kicking off her shoes before walking into the kitchen.

“No, not for dinner Cupcake. You know the rule, no cookies for dinner until after the kids move out and we can lord it over them.”

She put her bag down on the table, walking into the kitchen.

“Alright, Chicken Paprikash sounds great, I’ll just… get…” Carmilla trailed off as she noticed her children standing in a row in the living room doorway, staring at her blankly. “Hi… kids?”

“Hello Mama,” all three said at once with very slight smiles, “welcome home, it is good to have you back within our circle of love.”

Carmilla just stared at the three before turning on her heel and heading back towards the garage. “Y’know what Creampuff? I think I feel like dinner out tonight. Why don’t I meet you and Red at the Szechuan place on Broad?”

The rest of the conversation was lost as the door clicked behind her.

“I think we overdid it a bit,” said Drix, “should we call Moms and let them know we’re not actually possessed?”

“Probably,” said Mercy, “but I’m hungry. Pizza?”

“Pizza,” agreed Hazel as she came out of the stairwell, turning her phone camera off.

“Then we’ll call Moms,” said Charlie, “but what should we tell them so they know we’re not demon infested?”

Drix and Mercy looked at each other before saying together, “gotcha!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a bit of silliness. Hope you liked it!


	73. Weening Off the Treat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Carmilla's turn to watch the door for Halloween.

“One, two, three, shoot!”

Carmilla face fell as Danny's paper covered her rock before raising her arms in victory.

“Best of five?” Carmilla asked, holding her fist up pitifully.

“Nuh-uh, sorry Fangs,” Danny said, playfully kissing Carmilla on the forehead, “you get to crew the door this year.”

Carmilla sat heavily into one of the kitchen chairs before pouting over at Laura, holding out her fist.

Laura giggled. “Nice try, Carm, but I had the door last year. You know the rule.”

Carmilla hung her head over the back of the chair. “Ugh, fine.”

“Look on the bright side,” said Danny, “Charlie’s not going out this year, so you’ll have a little company.”

Carmilla perked up a little, but remained pensive. “Huh, do I rejoice at having company against the adolescent hordes or despair that one of my children has gotten too old to trick-or-treat?”

“I’d say rejoice and silence that other voice by breaking into the secondary backup candy,” said Laura.

“Secondary backup candy?” asked Danny, raising an eyebrow.

Laura went wide-eyed and pressed her lips together. “Yeah, y’know, the spare bag…” Laura met Danny’s deadpan stare. “...bag _ s _ of candy that I bought in case the trick-or-treat candy… and the back-up supply got given out… or mysteriously eaten.”

Danny sighed. “I’m not sure what disappoints me more, that you indulge your sugar addiction so badly… or that I do, cause I bought a bunch for the exact same reason.” Danny reached to the top of the kitchen cupboards and pulled down a couple boxes of fun size chocolate bars, tossing them onto the kitchen island.

Laura grinned. “Y’see Carm, plenty of my-child-is-growing-up consolation candy to be had.”

Carmilla unwrapped a piece and popped it into her mouth, chewing with relish. “Ok fine, but under protest.”

“‘Under protest’ I can work with,” said Danny, “little easier on the ears than last year’s ‘C’mon Danny, stay with me. Carm can totally handle the kids herself’”

“Hey, you said it was cute,” said Laura.

“I say a lot of things,” replied Danny.

Carmilla smiled. “Funny, her pitch to me was a lot more interesting.”

“But not interesting enough to keep you home?” asked Danny.

“Well, I wanted to have fun with the kids and quite frankly, no one would have answered the door for trick-or-treaters if I had.” Carmilla wiggled her eyebrows at Danny.”

Danny smirked at Laura. “I wondered why you jumped us so enthusiastically after we got the kids to bed that night.”

“I regret nothing,” said Laura firmly, popping a chocolate into her mouth.

“I wouldn’t regret that either,” said Danny, fanning herself with a hand.

“Well, nobody should ever have any…” Carmilla slowly took a bite of a chocolate. “...regrets.”

Danny and Laura glanced at each other.

“How long until we have to pick up the kids from Laf and Perry’s?” asked Danny.

“Bout an hour,” said Laura, glancing at the clock on the wall, “give or take.”

“You guys coming or what?” came Carmilla’s voice from up the stairs, “clock’s ticking.”

With another shared glance and a giggle, they quickly followed their wife to the bedroom.

x-x-x

“Red, you do know it’s supposed to be a  _ sexy _ policewoman’s outfit, right?” asked Carmilla.

Danny smoothed out the slacks she was wearing. “We’re taking our  _ kids _ trick-or-treating. Besides, it’ll still scan, especially with Laura’s costume,” she said, taking a moment to comb her fingers through her hair as it flowed over her shoulders, “you certainly recognized it.”

“With the number of times we’ve watched that show with her, I’d be surprised if I couldn’t recognize you in my sleep,” said Carmilla.

“That’s fair.”

“Danny, you ready to… Carm, you look adorable!” said Laura as she came down the stairs, doing up her bowtie.

“I’m not adorable, I’m a fierce predator,” Carmilla said dryly.

“Yes Laura, a fierce predator...” said Danny with a completely straight face, “...is one possible way to describe a cat kigurumi and matching facepaint.”

“You joke, but it was easy and I’m comfy,” said Carmilla, “I have to deal with the brats, so you’re not taking  _ this _ away from me.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” said Laura, deftly pulling the hood up to give Carmilla ears.

“Hey Moms?” asked Drix from the living room, “it’s getting dark, can we go?” He took a moment to adjust the pauldron he was wearing before attaching the fake chainsaw to his wrist.

“Sure yeah,” said Laura, checking her fez, “is your sister ready?”

“Sure am!” chimed in Mercy, walking in wearing a blue jacket and distinctive red billed cap. A yellow stuffed animal was perched on her shoulder.

“It took some doing,” said Charlie, giving the plush a tug, “I’ll rip the stitches out tomorrow and both should be fine.”

“Thanks Charlie, you look great too!” said Mercy.

Charlie looked over the fox kigurumi she had donned. “Easy and comfy! Perfect for a halloween at home.”

“That’s what I said,” echoed Carmilla, “told ya.”

“Alright, let’s go shake down strangers for candy!” declared Laura, to a series of unimpressed stares, “or y’know, ask nicely, that works too.” The stares continued. “I swear, bring eggs one year and you’re marked for a decade.” Laura marched off to the front door muttering.

“You two stay with your moms, alright?” said Carmilla to Drix and Mercy, “no running off ahead and worrying them.”

“Okay Mama,” they chimed, each taking a turn to hug her before grabbing their candy bags and running after Laura.

“You two also have fun,” said Danny.

“We will Mom,” said Charlie, “Hazel’s gonna be here any minute.”

“Make that now,” said Hazel, bounding into the room in a onesie covered in clowns.

Charlie laughed. “Hazel’s here now, so we’re gonna enjoy horror movies while we listen for the door.”

“Nothing too scary, I hope,” said Danny, “I’d still like you to be able to get to sleep tonight.”

“Final Destination,” said Carmilla with a wide smile, “one part horror, one part slapstick comedy. Not too scary, not too tame and entertaining all around.”

“Ooh, good choice. I kinda figured you’d go with Evil Dead,” she nodded towards the front door.

“Number two is on tap if the trick-or-treaters outlast the movie,” said Carmilla.

“Nice,” said Danny, “okay, we’ll be back in a couple of hours, give or take, then we can all head to Mom and Dad’s party.

“Who’s doing fireworks this year?” asked Charlie.

“Zach again,” said Danny, “it’s easy for him to get a permit through his work.”

“Ah nuts,” said Charlie, “Zach always plays it safe. Grandpa Paul really knows how to do a show.”

“Grandpa Paul nearly set the woods on fire,” said Danny, “there’s a reason Zach has to be the one who gets the permit now.”

“I remember that,” said Hazel, “that was awesome… until everything caught on fire.”

“Yeah, exactly,” said Danny.

“Danny, c’mon!” called Laura.

“Alright, you three have fun,” said Danny as she left.

“You too,” said Carmilla, before grabbing the remote and kicking back, “alright, who’s ready to cheer on Death?”

x-x-x

“Thank you,” chimed a group of kids as they wandered down the front path towards the street, examining their haul.

“You’re welcome!” said Carmilla, before muttering to herself, “come back never.” Placing the dwindling candy dish down, she walked back to the living room where the closing credits were rolling. “Aww, I missed the Paris scene?”

“Fraid so, we can rewind,” offered Charlie.

“Nah, the kids are petering out, so we need to keep moving if we want to get to ‘groovy’,” said Carmilla. There was a knock at the door and her shoulders slumped. “Why don’t you get it started and hopefully this’ll be the last of the night.”

“Ok!”

Carmilla did an about face and walked back to the front door, picking up the candy bowl and opening the door in one smooth motion.

“Trick-or-treat.”

Carmilla stood still, staring with a slight scowl at the three young men on her porch. “What?”

“Come on. Trick. Or. Treat.” said the one in the middle, “you unfamiliar with the concept?”

She looked him over disdainfully. “Oh I’m quite familiar and while I can certainly appreciate keeping up the practice well into one’s teens, there is usually the included addition of a costume.”

“Eh, costume was too much work,” said Left Lump, as Carmilla decided to think of him.

“Too much kids stuff,” said Right Lump.

“Besides,” said Middle Lump, “it’s not like you can talk. A onesie is hardly a costume.”

Carmilla grinned. “Oh, this is just my costume for the little kids, don’t want to scare them. My real costume is much more… intense… care to see?”

The Lumps looked unimpressed. “Pfff, I doubt it’s all that great.”

“Oh, you’ll probably be surprised,” she said. She closed her eyes as she drew back her hood, remaining still for just a moment. Then her eyes, snapped open and her lips parted in a fearsome opened mouth grin with her fangs, needle sharp and glistening in the candle light. 

The lumps jumped back in surprise and she decided to add the final piece.

“BOO!” she yelled, pumping her power into it so the air seemed to vibrate with the force.

All three Lumps turned tail and ran on the spot, leaving a cackling Carmilla in their wake.

“What happened?” asked Charlie as she and Hazel ran up, “I heard a— gah!” She jumped in surprise as she saw Carmilla’s fangs. “Would you put those away? You’re gonna bite your lip again.”

“Oops, sorry,” said Carmilla, retracting the teeth, “just was putting on a clinic in halloweening to some young gentlemen.”

“Must’ve been good,” said Hazel, picking up the dropped pillowcase off the porch, “they left their candy.”

“Ooh, the spoils of war, I presume?” said Laura, bouncing up the path.

“I assume you had something to do with the baby-bro’s bolting past us,” said Danny.

“I could get used to this whole ‘handing out candy’ thing,” replied Carmilla.

“Of course. Well, try to keep that in mind next time you have to hold the fort,” said Danny, shoulder bumping Carmilla, “you guys ready to go? Or you still watching something?”

“Nope, we finished our first movie and we were waiting on Mama for the second, so we’re not missing anything to go now.”

“Alright, Drix, Mercy… and Carmilla apparently, why don’t you go stash your haul and we’ll hop in the car,” said Laura.

“Sounds great,” said Carmilla, grabbing the other two pillowcases, “I can taste Sue’s pumpkin brittle already.”

“Oh and we ran into Elizabeth and Xavier,” said Danny as followed Carmilla into the house, “apparently Zach is letting Dad help with the fireworks.”

“Sweet!” exclaimed Charlie, “dibs on the garden hose.”

“Nuts, okay. The red extinguisher is mine,” said Hazel.

“Deal,” said Charlie as she shut the door, leaving the porch empty but for the jack-o-lanterns flickering in the evening breeze.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween all!
> 
> I hope everyone who celebrates it is having fun and everyone who doesn't is having fun anyhow.
> 
> Keep it spooky!


	74. Laying Down on the Job

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's really important to stay on top of your work.

“Greetings, faithful viewers! Welcome back to another wonderful update!”

Laura smiled at the camera, taking a moment to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear.

“Now, I realize I’m a little late this week,” she said, “like I’m sure most of you are, I've been in the midst of my midterms and it’s left me rather preoccupied, as you might imagine. Fortunately dear viewer, I have vanquished the last midterm beast naught but a half-hour ago.” She paused, putting a finger to her lips. “That’s a metaphorical beast, by the way, I’m not enrolled in any of the cryptid wrangling classes. After the concussion and dislocated ribs Lafontaine suffered taking the one-hundred level final last semester, that convinced me to steer clear, no matter how cute the Jackalopes and Esquilaxes are.”

There was a quick knock at the door before it opened with it’s characteristic creak. Laura looked over her shoulder, smiling at Danny as she walked in.

She turned back to the camera. “My beautiful girlfriend, Danny, everybody!”

Danny’s smile faded. “Wait, Laura, are you recording right now?”

“Well… yeah,” said Laura, switching her focus back and forth between Danny and the camera, unsure of which to face, “I mean I just toasted that last midterm, that one for Philosophy that Carm was helping me study for, so I finally have time to put up an update.” Laura held both hands towards the camera.

“What about our date?” asked Danny, hurt slipping into her voice.

“Date? But we said we were going to the grove the night of the nineteenth. Tomorr...ow…” Laura fell silent as her eyes fell on the calendar. The nineteenth was clearly marked with ‘ **MIDTERM** ’ in black marker. Laura’s jaw dropped. “Okay, so I may have lost a day somewhere. How did that happen?”

“Probably somewhere between Foucault and Sartre. Carmilla said you fell asleep during that study session, muttering something about perception and consciousness, ironically enough” said Danny.

“Right. Those were some weird dreams. I can’t say I’d even considered running from existential dread itself before,” said Laura before shaking her head, “ok, right. Just gimme a few minutes, I swear I’ll make this quick and then I’m all yours.” She whirled on her chair to face the camera again.”

“Laura, please? It’s date night,” asked Danny, holding up a basket, the likely origin of the delightful smells that Laura was now starting to notice.

Laura bit her lip as she turned back at Danny, still looking sidelong at the laptop. “Danny, I—”

The bathroom door creaked open and Carmilla, black as the pit and terrible as an angry rabbit, padded into the room, tail swishing slowly as she looked between them. Stretching as she moved, Carmilla lazily sauntered over to the desk, and before Laura could protest, she’d hauled herself up onto it.

“Oh, uh, Carm?” Laura stammered as the desk creaked under the weight of the panther.

Carmilla ignored the protest and proceeded to lay down, lazily rolling so that her belly pushed the laptop closed, trapping it beneath her.

The corners of Laura’s mouth turned down as she looked at Carmilla, who calmly blinked back at her. Her tail swayed off the edge of the desk contentedly. Danny had to hide her smile behind a hand.

“Uh, Carmilla?” said Laura hesitantly, “you're kinda on my laptop.”

The panther simply blinked again, not moving an inch.

“I think she’s aware,” said Danny smugly, “and I think she’s comfy.”

“Alright, I get it,” said Laura, getting up and heading to the wardrobe.

“Hey,” said Danny, putting a hand on Laura’s shoulder, “you can take care of it tomorrow. Besides, this way you can regale them with your experience witnessing the autumnal change of the dryads’ grove.”

“Ooh, that’s a great idea!” said Laura, turning to grab a notepad off the head of her bed.

Danny rested her hand on Laura’s. “Maybe leave the notebook, just work from memory. You’ll see more if you’re not trying to take notes.” She smiled at Laura warmly.

Laura kept her hand still before she turned it over, wrapping her fingers around Danny’s hand. “Alright, let’s go enjoy a show.” She smiled at Danny before standing on her tip-toes and quickly pecking her on the lips. “Let me just go throw on something I haven’t been marinating in stress sweat all day.” Grabbing a nice flannel and some jeans she quickly retreated into the bathroom.

“Good work, Fangs,” said Danny, scratching Carmilla on the head, “much better than my plan of hucking the laptop out the window.”

Carmilla shifted back. “Is that— I didn’t say stop.”

Danny smiled and rolled her eyes, but began combing her fingers through Carmilla’s hair.

“Is that still an option?” Carmilla continued.

“Only if you back it up first and buy me a better one,” said Laura, tossing her worn clothes into the hamper, “with an HD webcam!”

“Y’know, it’s a fine computer. Why be petty?” said Carmilla, getting up off the desk.

“Uh-huh, right,” said Laura, grabbing a folded blanket off Carmilla’s bed, “you got the champagne?”

“Of course, creampuff,” said Carmilla, retrieving a bottle from the fridge, “I opted for something a little less dry today. Feels more like autumn to me.”

“I’ll take your word for it,” said Laura.

“But please be gentle opening it,” said Danny, “I don’t want you to surprise the dryads and make them wither a tree.”

“Is that something that can happen?” asked Laura.

“I really don’t know, but after that incident with that cork in the library, I really don’t want to be taking any chances,” said Danny.

“Don’t worry, I’ll keep it nice and in control, if only to keep from ruining the mood,” Carmilla said.

“Well good, let’s get going,” said Danny, holding open the door, “it’s best after dark, but it’ll be easier to eat before sunset.”

“Oh, hold on just one second,” said Laura heading back into the room.

Danny and Carmilla froze, already working out how to pry Laura away from whatever task she may try to pick up.

“Found it!” she said, holding aloft a camera, “time to make some memories.”

Danny and Carmilla chuckled.

“Good thinking,” said Danny as she pulled the door shut.

x-x-x

Mercy quietly whistled a seemingly random string of notes as she scratched at the page with her pencil.

“What are you trying to spell?” asked Charlie, “that actually sounded kinda pretty.”

“Chromosome,” said Mercy as she sketched an elongated ‘X’ shape into a blank space in her workbook.

“Well you should write it down,” said Charlie absently as she referred to the open textbook in front of her.

“I just did,” said Mercy, pointing to her homework with a smirk.

“The notes I mean,” said Charlie, tossing a ball of paper at Mercy, “smart alec.”

Mercy laughed and grabbed a coil-bound notebook of manuscript from her backpack, jotting the tune down onto a page filled with other scribbled notes.

“You are gonna be the first musical artist in history to launch with an album that doubles as a spelling bee,” joked Drix.

Mercy laughed before tapping her lips thoughtfully with her pencil, scratching something else down on the page before putting the notebook away.

“What was that?” asked Drix, tapping away at a calculator.

“‘Spelling Bee’” said Mercy, “that’s an album title if I ever heard one.”

“Do try to remember us little people when you’re a famous rockstar,” said Charlie.

“Remember? No, I’m dragging you two along with me to keep me sane,” said Mercy, returning to her workbook.

“Dibs on the red skittles,” said Drix.

“You’ll be quite disappointed then,” said Charlie, “I’ll be making sure they only stock the green rooms with purple ones.”

Mercy rolled her eyes. “Ok, let’s get to stardom first before we start thinking of ludicrous demands for the poor roadies… besides, you’re both wrong, everyone knows you ask for green M&Ms. It’s just proper etiquette.”

“My sincerest apologies,” said Drix, before the three once again continued to work in comfortable silence.

They weren’t working long when their Moms wandered into the room.

“Alright, it’s Saturday, it’s sunny, we should go out and do something fun,” declared Danny, dropping onto the couch beside Charlie and wrapping an arm around her.

“I’m thinking mini-golf,” said Laura, sitting on the couch behind Drix’s seat on the floor, resting her hands on his shoulders.

Charlie lit up before looking back down at her homework. “That sounds fun, but I’m kinda on a roll here.”

“Same,” said Drix, “maybe tomorrow?”

Carmilla stood aghast, wandering over to kneel beside Mercy. “How ‘bout you, squirt?”

Mercy looked at her two siblings then back to her mama. “I work a lot better with them.”

Carmilla turned to her wives. “Y’know, I blame you two for this.”

Laura opened her mouth to protest before shutting it and looking at Danny, who shrugged. “Okay, that’s fair… but c’mon, it’s supposed to be raining tomorrow. Perfect homework weather!”

The kids exchanged glances, ghosts of smiles appearing on their faces.

“No. We’re going to be the good kids you raised us to be and finish our homework,” declared Charlie for the group.

“Oh for the love of…” said Danny, standing up, “alright, this is for your own good.”

Walking over to the end of the coffee table, Danny shifted, bringing her front paws down onto the table as she changed. With a quick hop, she hefted her hindquarters onto the table before she flopped down, bringing herself nose-to-nose with Drix and covering every square inch of table and homework with giant wolf. Cheekily, she licked Drix’s face, prompting him to jump back, laughing.

“I hope you realize that this means you’re not allowed to get angry at us next time we’re procrastinating on homework,” said Charlie, experimentally poking at her mother’s fur to see if she could get at her books.

Carmilla shrugged. “Works for me, less effort that way.”

“I still reserve the right to remind you, but otherwise, deal,” said Laura, “so… minigolf?”

“Alright,” said Charlie, stretching as she stood up, “dibs on the purple ball.”

“Red for me,” added Drix.

“Green!” said Mercy.

The three teenagers got up and headed towards the mudroom to get ready.

“Nicely done,” said Carmilla as Danny shifted back, stepping off the coffee table awkwardly, “didn’t even crease the pages… though Charlie may give you the gears about dog hair in her textbook.” Carmilla brushed off the open page.

“Hey, I learned from the best,” said Danny as they followed after the kids.

“Hey, grab the camera, it’s gonna be a good day for it!” called Laura from the garage.

“Good thinking!” said Danny as she grabbed it’s bag off the hook and followed them out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was inspired by an adorable picture of Jessi's dog interrupting her own homework.
> 
> I hope you all liked this one! Until next time.


	75. Worried Sick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caring for a sick family by yourself is not necessarily the best option.

Perry stepped out of her car and smiled. It was a beautiful spring day, warm and sunny with just a few puffy clouds. She paused and took a deep breath, revelling in the sweet smell of flowers on the breeze. What a perfect day to be outside.

Her eyes fell upon the house she’d parked in front of, remembering just why she’d come over. Poor Drix had caught some nasty sniffle and had been stuck in bed since yesterday so Perry had taken it upon herself to make up some soup.

Not just any soup mind you.

Now, Perry would never besmirch the fine and well-deserved reputation of the classic Chicken Noodle in the pantheon of home remedies. However, there was no better remedy that Perry had found than a punchy Tom Yum soup she’d found a few years back. Bright and warm with enough spice to clear the sinuses for no fewer than four hours.

Pulling the insulated travel pot out of the back seat, Perry shut the car and made her way to the front door of the house with a bounce in her step, softly humming tunelessly. She rapped on the door politely, before grasping the handle to enter. Problem was, it didn’t budge.

Perry pursed her lips as she tried again, but the latch remained firm. Tilting her head curiously, she set down the pot and pulled out her keys, unlocking the latch and deadbolt just to make certain. When she tried again, the door gave a little but barely moved half an inch before something behind it stopped it from opening.

She frowned and began to walk around the house to try the back when she heard the telltale squeak of the mailslot. She turned around just in time to see a folded piece of paper slip out and onto the ground. Picking it up and opening it, she found Carmilla’s elegant script on the inside.

> _Plague has taken us_
> 
> _Flee while you can_
> 
> _-C_

Perry looked between the note and the house before reaching into her pocket and pulling out her phone.

_“Hello?”_ came Carmilla’s groggy voice.

“You know a simple phone call would have been easier than the cloak and dagger approach.”

_“What?... Oh... that was you? Right…peepholes are a thing...”_ Carmilla trailed off.

Perry was now very much alarmed. “What’s going on, Sweetie?”

_“Everyone’s sick,”_ Carmilla groaned, _“fevers all around. Even I’ve got a sore throat.”_

Perry frowned at that. “Everyone all at once?”

“ _Nearly,”_ said Carmilla, _“the kids were first and we were pretty much up all night looking after them. Laura and Danny both started getting feverish a bit before dawn, so I made them hit the hay.”_

“Did you get any sleep at all?” asked Perry.

_“I dozed a little on the couch waiting for coffee to brew.”_

Perry put her face in her hand. “Carmilla, dear. Why don’t you open the door? I’ll take care of everyone while you get some rest.”

There was silence on the line for several second.

_“Tempting, but no,”_ said Carmilla, _“you’ll get sick too.”_

“Carmilla, I appreciate your concern, but you will get sicker without rest,” argued Perry as she resumed making her way around the house.

_“Who’s concerned?” said Carmilla, “I just don’t want to have to take care of a sixth person.”_

Perry smiled at the deflection. “Even if I do get sick, I can get Lafontaine to come get me.” She made her way up onto the deck and tried the doorwall, finding it locked as well. She craned her neck to see the security bolts had been set as well, so trying her key would be pointless.

“ _Even the science geek isn’t immune,”_ said Carmilla, _“and do you really want to have to worry about what they whip up to cure themself?”_

It was then that Perry saw Carmilla shuffle into the kitchen in a sweatshirt and pyjama pants, head down, holding her phone to her ear with one hand and a mug in the other. Perry knocked on the window and Carmilla jumped, dropping her phone. Perry winced at the loud clatter that came over the line.

Putting her mug on the counter, Carmilla picked the phone back up. “ _Cute, but still no.”_

Perry frowned at Carmilla through the glass.

“ _Go home, Easybake. I’ll be alright. I can go without sleep for a while, at least long enough for everyone to get better,”_ said Carmilla.

“Alright, I’ll go,” huffed Perry, “for now, but I’m coming back to check on you later.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes. _“If you must.”_

“Oh, and I have soup!” said Perry, placing the insulated bag in front of the door, “there’s probably only enough for everyone to have one bowl, but I’m bringing more with me next time. Promise me you’ll have some.”

Carmilla chuckled softly. _“That much I can do. Now beat it.”_ She smiled at Perry through the glass to soften the rebuke.

“Alright,” said Perry, “call me if you need anything. I’m serious.”

“ _Alright,”_ said Carmilla, _“now shoo!”_

Perry shook her head with a smile as she hung up the phone and walked back around the house, taking a look back at the door just in time to see the door open and a hand shoot out to snatch the soup.

x-x-x

“Mama?” came Mercy’s call.

Carmilla woke with a snort, jerking her head up from the granite countertop. Beside her hand sat her now-cold cup of coffee. Shaking her head to try and wake up, she got up from the stool, glancing at the clock as she made for the stairs. She’d only nodded off for about a half-hour.

She made her way to Mercy’s room to find Laura bent over Mercy’s bed, a blanket wrapped around her own shoulders. She was helping Mercy sit up and drink a glass of water.

“Cupcake, why are you up?” asked Carmilla, rubbing Laura on the back once she’d put the water glass back down.

“ ** _I can’t sleep anymore so I decided to get up and help,_** _”_ Laura croaked, “ ** _besides, I’m actually feeling a lot better._** _”_

Carmilla raised an eyebrow at that. “Yes, because you _sound_ so much better.” She put a hand to Laura’s forehead. “And you still have a fever.”

Laura groaned, resting her head on Carmilla’s shoulder.

“C’mon, if you don’t wanna sleep, we can set ya up on the couch with something suitably nerdy,” said Carmilla, leading Laura by the shoulders as they quietly left Mercy, who’d already fallen back asleep.

“ ** _Goblet of Fire?_** _”_ asked Laura.

“Whatever you want, Cr—”

The dull rumble of the garage door opening drew Carmilla’s attention.

“Laura,” asked Carmilla, “is Danny up too?”

“ ** _I don’t think so, she was still sawing logs when I got up,_** ” said Laura as they reached the bottom of the stairs.

“Then who?”

“Hello!” came Perry’s sing-song from the mudroom, “I have more soup!”

“ ** _Oh nice!_** ” said Laura, “ ** _I haven’t had the sniffles since lunch._** ” She started to make her way into the kitchen but paused when Carmilla put a steadying hand on her shoulder.

“Wait Cupcake,” said Carmilla, “Curls, I thought I told you to scram.”

“And I did,” rebutted Perry, “but I also said I’d be back and here I am.”

“How’d you open the garage?” asked Carmilla, “I changed the code.”

“ ** _Carm!_** ” scolded Laura.

“What? I was gonna change it back.”

Laura huffed but said nothing.

“Oh, I just borrowed a couple tools from Lafontaine and hotwired it,” said Perry, pulling a small screwdriver from her pocket, “it was actually painfully easy, you should probably invest in a better one.”

Carmilla and Laura just stared at Perry incredulously.

She met their gazes calmly. “Floor dons needed a diverse skill set.” She spun the screwdriver like a drumstick before pocketing it again.

Carmilla pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m not sure whether you’re brilliant or an idiot.”

“I could say the same thing about you, Ms. ‘I’m sick and won’t rest’,” countered Perry.

“ ** _She’s not wrong,_** _”_ said Laura with a giggle before coughing.

Carmilla rolled her eyes. “Well, when you keel over, I’m gonna say ‘I told you so’.”

“If it means that _you_ don’t, I’ll call it well earned,” said Perry.

Carmilla started grumbling when the sound of Charlie coughing floated down the stairs. She took a deep breath and started to turn towards the stairs.

“Ah ah ah,” said Perry, “ _I_ will take care of her, _you_ are going to bed.”

Carmilla started to protest but a wave of exhaustion passed over her and her shoulders slumped. “Alright, that is just too good to pass up.” She trudged up the stairs with Perry beside her.

Perry stopped at Charlie’s door. “Sleep well, Carmilla.” She patted Carmilla on the back as she continued down the hallway.

“Oh,” said Carmilla turning around, “can you make Laura some hot chocolate? I was going to set her up when you came in.”

Perry smiled. “Of course.”

“Thank you,” Carmilla said softly before opening her bedroom door.

Letting fatigue sweep over herself, Carmilla simply climbed into bed, snuggled up to Danny and fell asleep.

x-x-x

“I told you so.”

Perry coughed. “ ** _Worth it._** ”

Carmilla smiled softly as she pulled the guest bed blankets a little higher.

“ ** _Thank you for letting me stay here,_** _”_ said Perry.

“Eh, don’t worry about it. Don’t want you getting your little ones sick… or Laf for that matter,” said Carmilla, “I wasn’t kidding about being worried about their cure attempts.”

“ ** _That’s fair,_** _”_ said Perry, yawning, “ ** _which is why I told them to leave it alone and just watch the girls._** ”

“Clever,” said Carmilla, “alright, get some rest. One of us will come down to force some awful medicine on you in a few hours.”

“ ** _Alright,_** _”_ murmured Perry sleepily.

“Oh, and Perr?”

“ ** _Mmm?_** _”_

“Thank you, for coming over,” said Carmilla, “I really appreciate it.”

There was no response aside from steady even breathing. Carmilla chuckled softly as she turned out the light and quietly shut the door.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one comes from a prompt I got from my friend Ry. I hope this does what you had in mind justice.
> 
> I'm always happy to take prompts. Feel free to leave them in the comments or in my ask box on my tumblr cheezewhiz-cupcake.
> 
> Until next week!


	76. Beyond Belief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When your partners just go a little too far

“I can’t believe you did that!”

“C’mon Red,” said Carmilla, looking very much like the cat that had gotten the cream, “she totally had it coming.”

Danny paused, a flicker of satisfaction crossing her face before she looked at Carmilla sternly again. “That’s not the point. We are supposed to take the high road.”

Carmilla smirked at Danny. “You did take the high road, as far as she knows.”

“As far as she knows? This is Mel we’re talking about, she knows everything,” Danny said, wringing her hands, “Elsie took one of Mel’s energy bars once, out of a box of eighty. Mel not only noticed it missing, but somehow figured out it had been Elsie within the hour.”

“Well, let’s face it. Elsie’s pretty cool, but she’s not exactly what you’d refer to as subtle,” said Carmilla, “I’d would not be surprised if she wasn’t so much caught as gloating.”

Danny shrugged. “That’s fair, but my point stands. If she figures it out, she is gonna make my life a living hell for the rest of the semester.”

“Well, then I guess you’ll just have to spend the next few months sleeping in my bed rather than yours,” said Carmilla, “such a shame.”

“Why not my bed?” said Laura, walking in and tossing her backpack onto Danny’s desk.

“Because your bed will be mysteriously covered in dirty laundry, and you’ll have to share with us,” said Carmilla.

“Seems acceptable. So why are we all sharing a bed?” asked Laura, crawling onto Danny’s bed to cuddle with her.

“Because our vindictive girlfriend decided to replace Mel’s cardio playlist with twenty hours of primal scream therapy recordings,” said Danny.

“Where did you get twenty hours of primal scream therapy recordings?” asked Laura.

“That’s your question?!” said Danny, “not ‘Why?’”

“Danny, it’s Mel. She probably had it coming,” countered Laura.

Danny huffed but said nothing.

“So?” said Laura, turning to Carmilla.

Carmilla shrugged. “Eh, the glee club has a pretty wide catalogue. 1997 was a creative year for them.”

“Very nice,” said Laura, “now that that’s settled, any particular reason, or just general vindictiveness?”

“Mel decided to chew Danny out for covering someone else’s patrol,” said Carmilla, “something, something, teaching responsibility, something, something.”

Laura looked deadpan at Danny. “I was right, she had it coming.”

Danny reluctantly nodded. “Fine, yeah… but she still—”

There was a pounding at the door. 

“Lawrence! Open up!” yelled Mel.

Danny blanched, looking at her girlfriends. Carmilla gestured to the door, raising an eyebrow in question. Taking a deep breath, Danny nodded, bracing herself as Carmilla opened the door.

Mel stood in the doorway, looking at Carmilla and Laura before focussing on Danny. “Hey, Teresa is taking your patrol shift tonight. She needs to know she can’t just dump it.”

Danny blinked. “Oh... really?”

“Yeah, go on a date or something.”

“Oh, ok. Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. Really,” said Mel, “I didn’t do it for you.” Mel turned to leave before pausing and looking at back at Carmilla. “Oh, and Karnstein? Good playlist. The constant screaming made for pretty good running motivation, like I was chasing down my terrified enemies. But... touch my stuff again and I will have a vat of molasses blessed before I dip you in it. So yeah, at your own risk.” Eyeing Laura and Danny once more, she turned and left, closing the door behind her.

Carmilla stared at the closed door. “...how?”

“I told you,” said Danny, “she knows everything.”

x-x-x

“I can’t believe you did that!”

Laura stomped down the stairs, cinching up a robe around herself tightly as she stalked into the living room. She paced between the couches before plopping down and crossing her arms.

The only response was a cascade of laughter following after her. Laura scrunched her face up, glaring at the stairs as Danny finally came walking down, tying up her own robe. As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she paused. She smirked at Laura and tugged at her robe just enough to generously lower the neckline.

Laura’s face went slack and pink as her eyes followed the fabric. She forgot why she was angry for several seconds before shaking her head to snap out of it. “Stop that!”

Danny laughed again, leaving her robe right where it was, much to Laura’s obvious distraction. “I don’t honestly see what the problem is.”

Laura simply stared at her wife, looking seriously unimpressed.

“I mean, it seemed kinda… fun?” said Danny, eyeing the door to the deck.

“Fun?” asked Laura, turning her head just enough to follow Danny’s eye line. She shifted her gaze back, beginning to smirk, “well, if that’s the case, I’m sure you’d really enjoy it.” She stood up and walked back towards the kitchen.

Danny bit her lip, edging across the kitchen floor. “Oh… yes… I’m sure I’d…”

Danny bolted towards the doorwall, Laura in hot pursuit. Danny threw open the door and ran out onto the lawn, barely avoiding Laura grabbing her robe, fingertips just brushing the soft silk.

“Get back here!” exclaimed Laura, laughter in her voice as she watched Danny run out into the sunshine, “you’re missing all the fun.”

“But I am having plenty of fun! It’s a beautiful day! The sun is shining! The birds are sing—” She ducked as a bird swooped near her head. “Fucking killdeer!”

Laura broke down laughing as Danny shooed the bird away, completely losing any air of temptation she may have held.

“So I guess attempting the Marilyn Monroe would be somewhat pointless now.” Danny pouted.

Laura’s smile became conciliatory as she walked down onto the lawn. “I’m not sure there is enough breeze to pull it off today, though I honestly would have been impressed if you’d gotten the timing down.”

“Well, I’m glad my efforts would have been…” Danny paused, eyeing Laura suspiciously. “...recognized.” Danny took a cautious step back.

“Completely recognized,” said Laura, “why don’t you let me reward your cleverness?” She quickened her pace.

Danny started backing away. “Y’know what? I’m fine.”

“No,no,” said Laura with a predatory grin, “I insist.” She lunged as Danny danced out of reach. “Get back here Lawrence!” Laura picked up the pace and proceeded to chase Danny in circles around the yard.

“Well, while I can’t say that coming home to both my wives minimally dressed is unpleasant,” interrupted Carmilla from the back door, “the round of cardio in the backyard, I’m less enthused about.”

Laura made a beeline for the deck. “Carrm… Danny been really mean to me.” She walked into Carmilla’s arms, resting her head on her wife’s shoulder.

Carmilla stroked Laura’s hair, glancing with amusement at Danny who was barely holding her laughter in. “How’s Danny being mean? Did she steal your clothes?” Carmilla tugged at the bath robe.

Laura pouted even more, pulling back to look Carmilla in the face. “No. We were upstairs having fun and she blew a raspberry right on my boob.”

Carmilla bit her lip to keep from laughing as she looked over at Danny, who nodded gleefully. “Oh, well, that wasn’t very nice of her, was it?” She put an arm over Laura and led her back into the house.

“No, it wasn’t,” said Laura, “things were going so nicely and I’m still really wound up.”

“Oh?” purred Carmilla, “well, I think I might be able to help with that.”

Laura’s pout faded into a smile. “Well, I suppose I’d appreciate that.” She looked over her shoulder at Danny. “I might even let you come along.”

“Well, thank you,” said Danny sarcastically.

“Well, I guess first of all, I have some catching up to do,” said Carmilla. 

She leaned in to kiss Laura’s cheek, down her neck, across her collarbone and along her neckline, down to…

“THBBBPT!”

“Carm!” exclaimed Laura as Carmilla and Danny scattered.

x-x-x

“I can’t believe you did that.”

“Well, he was asking so nicely. With these big round eyes. I couldn’t say no,” said Laura, wringing her hands.

Carmilla blinked slowly. “You couldn’t say no… to a three year old… asking for coffee ice cream.”

“...yes?”

Carmilla rested her head in her hand. “Mercy and Sky are gonna kill us.”

“Ash has always been an incredibly energetic child,” Laura reasoned, “maybe they won’t notice.”

They both looked outside where the small wolf pup was running rapid circles around the yard, throwing up divots of turf with every change of direction. In the middle of the lawn, the sprawled red form of an exhausted Danny lay with her sides heaving.

“That is not a child, that is a sentient superball, said Carmilla, “we are so lucky that he is well behaved or else I’m not sure the house would still be standing.”

“Oh, it’d be fine,” said Laura, “it survived Drix and Mercy teething, it can survive a little hyperactivity. Besides, I’m sure your Dad would be happy to come over and help.”

“If you want to see Daddy, I can just call him,” said Carmilla.

“I know, but it’s really fun when he’s wearing someone,” said Laura.

“I will agree with you if you promise never to call it ‘wearing someone’ ever again,” said Carmilla, her expression souring, “he’s my dad, not Buffalo Bill.”

Laura nodded acceptingly. “That’s fair. I honestly kinda regretted the moment I said it.”

“As you should. Now what do we do about this?” asked Carmilla, nodding back outside, “I’m fairly certain I’m fresh out of tranquilizers… and that Mercy would disown us if we knocked out her son with tranqs.”

“Well, we’ve tried exhausting him, without effect,” said Laura, somewhat concerned with the way Danny was twitching, “do we have any turkey?”

“Myth,” commented Carmilla dryly, “and even if it wasn’t, the amount of turkey we’d need would bring us back to doping our grandson.”

“I thought I was supposed to be the one with ethics in this arrangement,” said Laura with a slight chuckle.

“Ethics are overrated,” gasped Danny as she walked in the door, “do we have a leash?”

“Fraid not Red,” said Carmilla, “not since Trudy chewed apart our spare.”

“You’d think a twenty-five year old bassett hound would have mellowed out about that by now,” said Laura.

“Yes, because most creatures become  _ less _ set in their ways as they get older,” quipped Carmilla.

“Point taken,” said Laura, “so do we have any other ideas?”

“Any other ideas for what?” asked Mercy, coming in from the front entrance.

“Well…” said Danny, inclining her head towards the window.

Mercy and Sky looked out to see Ash enthusiastically digging at the ground with his paws before bounding across the yard and back again.

Mercy immediately turned to Laura. “How much sugar?”

“Why do you automatically blame me?” asked Laura.

Mercy smirked. “Who was the one who taught me how to make eggless cookie dough at age eight?”

“Fine, you’re right,” Laura admitted, “and not just sugar, caffeine too.”

“Caffeine?” said Sky, “not again.”

“Again?” asked Danny.

“He got into some chocolate covered coffee beans that Aaron brought over a couple months back,” said Mercy.

“And now a scoop of espresso gelato gives us the sequel,” groaned Laura, “I’m so sorry you two.”

“It’s fine,” said Sky as Mercy went to collect their son, “we’ve got a secret weapon for this.”

“You do?” asked Laura, looking hopeful.

“Yep,” said Sky, “box set of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.”

“That, is, brilliant,” said Danny.

“You can thank Grandma Sue, she gave it to us,” said Mercy, hitching a squirmy Ash onto her hip, “something about a little redhead always trying to bolt into the woods?”

Danny blushed but laughed. “Sounds about right.”

“Alright, we should get going if we’re gonna get him calmed down. Thanks for watching him,” said Sky.

“It’s always a pleasure,” said Carmilla, walking over to give Ash and Mercy a kiss.

“Say bye to grandmas,” said Mercy.

“Bye gandmas!” exclaimed Ash, “thanks for i’cream.”

Laura giggled. “You’re welcome.”

“Bye!” said Mercy as the little family headed out.

Laura, Carmilla and Danny waved goodbye from the front porch before heading back inside and collapsing on the couch.

“I’m beat,” said Danny, “I feel like I could fall asleep, but it’s only five-thirty.”

“Well, you know what might help wake you up?” suggested Carmilla, “come coff—”

Laura snorted with laughter as Danny cut Carmilla off with a pillow to the face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More silliness! Not much more to say. Hope y'all liked it!


	77. Red Suits That Street

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mattie takes Ruth and Carmilla out

It was a dark and stormy night. 

Well technically, early evening, not that Ruth really cared. As far as she was concerned, the storm could rage all it wanted. She had one wife under one arm, the other napping in her lap and their cabal of children in the room with them. A light-hearted movie on the TV sealed the deal so as far as Ruth was concerned, the evening was idyllic.

As far as fate seemed to be concerned, however, it had other plans as a sharp repeating rap came from the front door.

Scout started to get up, but Hayden was quicker, the teenager scampering out of the room to answer the knock. Ruth nuzzled her wife as she resettled, but turned her attention to listening to the door.

“Hello,” came Hayden's voice, “can I—”

“Well hello puff ball,” came a familiarly elegant voice, “excuse me, I’ll be just a minute.”

“Wait, but…” stammered Hayden.

Ruth turned to look at the entrance to the room, a look of irritation already settling in, as Mattie turned the corner and smiled broadly at her adoptive sister.

“Stripes!” she exclaimed, “go put on something fetching. We are going out!”

Ruth blinked slowly, a calculating look on her face. “Hmm… no. Thank you.”

Mattie’s grin shrank, though an amused smile remained. “I’m sorry, what?”

“No thank you,” repeated Ruth, “as you can see, we’ve already settled in for a pleasant evening.”

Mattie’s gaze swept around the room. “Well darling, I won’t argue the ‘pleasant’ part, if dull, but it feels like forever since we’ve had some excitement. Just the three of us.”

“Three of us?” asked Scout.

“Well, of course,” said Mattie, her smile broadening once more, “I would never leave out our sister. If anything, she needs to get out even more than you do. I think she’s taken up knitting.”

Ruth glanced quickly at the maroon throw over the other couch before returning her attention to Mattie. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

Mattie pursed her lips. “Stripes…”

“You should go.”

Ruth looked down at Ava, yawning lightly in her lap. “What?”

Ava shook her head a little as she sat up. “You should go out. It’s been weeks since you’ve done anything with Carmilla, to say nothing of Matska.”

“But we’re—”

“Sitting around enjoying a night in watching the telly,” said Ava, “which we’ve done many times before and will do a many times again.”

“She’s right, Babe,” agreed Scout.

“I know I’m right,” said Ava.

“Hush love,” said Scout, “go out and have some fun.”

Ruth could only chuckle. “I love you two, you know that right?”

“Of course,” said Ava, shuffling over to kiss Ruth.

“Just like we love you,” said Scout, nuzzling into Ruth’s side again.

Mattie stared at the display before turning to the kids. “Are they always this sickening?”

Aero shrugged. “Nah, they’re toning it down tonight.”

“Ha ha,” said Ruth, tossing a cushion at her son, “I guess I should go make myself look fancy. What are we going for tonight? I can honestly never tell with you. The difference between your casual and formal wear is razor thin.”

“Side effect of elegance, my dear.” Mattie preened. “Simply pick something nice. It’s not like we’re near anywhere like Quadrilatero d’Oro or Harajuku. Whatever you have will do.”

“You managed to insult both my fashion sense and where I’ve chosen to live in one breath. I’m almost impressed.”

Mattie laughed. “Not quite what I meant, dear. Good taste and ‘fashion’ tend not to go hand in hand these days. I prefer to avoid it when I can.”

Ruth eyed Mattie suspiciously before shrugging and disappearing upstairs.

“So…” said Ava awkwardly, “can we offer you a drink? Coffee? Tea? Blood? I think Ruth has some A neg in the fridge.”

“I appreciate the gesture,” said Mattie, “but I think I will abstain for now.”

“That’s a new one,” commented Ruth, affixing an earring as she reentered the room in a blouse and capris, “I remember a time when you’d happily guzzle an entire blacksmith right before dinner and then sit down without so much as wiping your chin.”

“I’ll be honest,” said Mattie, “that was more to irritate mother than anything.”

Ruth nodded approvingly. “I can get behind that reasoning.” She walked back over to her wives, giving them each a kiss. “Alright, I have my phone with me and I’ll be back around…” She looked to Mattie for an estimate.

Mattie simply stared back, expressionless.

“...I’ll be back.” Ruth shrugged, to her wives’ amusement.

“Have fun, be safe,” said Scout.

“Will do and maybe,” said Ruth, “night, you guys.”

The kids all waved goodbye before returning their attention to the TV.

“See, they trust me to be safe,” said Ruth.

“Uh-huh,” said Ava, giving Ruth another kiss, “have a good night.” She lightly smacked Ruth’s butt to get her on her way.

The elder vampire just rolled her eyes before following Ruth out.

“A limo, very swank,” said Ruth as she got into the stretch, “so did you call Mir ahead of time?” 

“Of course not,” said Mattie, lounging back, “it’s more fun this way.”

Ruth grinned. She couldn’t really argue with that.

x-x-x

“I swear,” yelled Danny as Mattie glided after Carmilla towards the car, “if you weren’t family, I would hate you so much right now!”

Mattie paused to grin back at Danny. “Well then, I’m glad to know you care. You may want to check on the gidget though. It can’t be healthy for her face to turn that shade of red.”

Danny opened her mouth to snap back, but opted to just nod sternly before going to find Laura before she could tear apart another cushion.

“So now that you’ve fully antagonized my wives,” said Carmilla as Mattie made herself comfortable, “perhaps you can tell me what our plan is here.”

“The plan is simply to have fun,” said Mattie. She popped open a compartment in one side of the cabin as the limo began to move, revealing a bottle of blood and glasses. “What that entails…” She poured generous glasses for both women, “...we’ll just have to see.”

“I’ll drink to that,” said Ruth, raising her glass.

Two more glasses clinked against hers.

x-x-x

“Y’know, I’ll never understand why popular culture always depicts vampires as liking dark techno raves.”

Carmilla lounged back in the worn leather chair, methodically swirling the tumbler of scotch she held in her left hand. Off in the corner of the room, a jazz quartet filled the room with complex but mellow music.

“Well, might have something to the wardrobe that some of us insist on keeping,” commented Ruth, pinching a fold of Carmilla’s leather pants and letting them snap back into place.

“Hey, the techno rave crowd doesn’t have a monopoly on leather pants,” protested Carmilla.

“Perhaps not darling, but they have quite a staggering market share,” observed Mattie, gesturing with her wineglass.

“Do you think that’s why I was getting dirty looks over dinner?” said Carmilla, a smug smile on her face.

“Darling, I think that had more to do with the fact that you had your boots up on the table for the entire meal,” Mattie said with an amused smirk.

“Best part was the owner having to physically restrain the maitre'd from chewing you out. I thought that coot's eyes were going to pop out of his head when she said to ‘come back soon’,” said Ruth, taking a sip of her martini, “I obviously need to make more liberal use of my savings if that’s the sort of entertainment that just a nice tip can raise.”

“I’ve been telling you that for years,” said Mattie, “though I must say I’m disappointed. I was looking forward to a nice dinner of pushing buttons, and you go for the coup de grace right out of the gate.”

“Dirty boots and white tablecloths,” said Carmilla, “it’s hard to go wrong with a classic.”

“Oh my dear Kitty cat, I'll teach you the long game yet,” said Mattie, “but that's a game for another time. What now? Some mayhem, perhaps?”

“Actually,” said Ruth, “I'm actually kinda in the mood for ice cream.”

“Ice cream…” Mattie repeated, completely deadpan.

“Ooh yeah,” agreed Carmilla, “a double-scoop of fudge ripple would hit the spot right now.”

“Really? Ice cream,” said Mattie, her voice etched with disbelief, “why would you want such a simple… juvenile…”

x-x-x

“Alright, I see your point,” said Mattie, eating a small spoonful of rum raisin.

They sat at the window seat of the quiet ice cream parlour, watching the storm as forks of lightning danced across the night sky.

“Told ya,” said Carmilla, taking a bite of her cone, “I mean, don't get me wrong, I think we do need to plan something a little closer to the glory days, though sans murder this time.”

“Maybe a week in New York?” suggested Ruth, taking a lick of her tiger-tail cone, “a few days to play... and a few more to recover. I’d rather not have a repeat of the time I had to fish you two out of the  Soài Rạp after your little Saigon bender. ”

“I think that sounds wonderful, I'll have to start planning,” said Mattie. She turned to Carmilla, “though I wish you'd change your mind. It's been forever since I had a really good hunt. I think there's a gentleman's club not far from here that could spare a few members.”

A firm hand fell on Mattie's shoulder from behind. “I really wouldn't recommend that, young one. They have an important fundraiser for the local shelter this weekend.”

Carmilla lit up. “Oh, hello Zeke! I didn't see you come in.”

“I was here already. I'm quite fond of going over patient files with a bowl of butter pecan so I'm often secluded in the corner here while I work,” he said, “but I figured I'd come say hello. It's been a while, dear Matska.”

“It has indeed, Apothecary,” said Mattie, “or I guess I should say ‘doctor’ now.”

Zeke simply smiled. “Whatever makes you comfortable little one, but I should return to my notes. I'll leave you three to an enjoyable… and peaceful, evening.” With a smile, he returned to the booth in the corner, disappearing behind the high seat.

“Well that settles that,” said Mattie, a slight quaver in her voice, “but I'm glad he's mellowed somewhat. Once upon a time, he would lay waste to an entire mercenary guild for merely threatening a village under his care.”

“Well, it's a kinder world… in some ways,” said Ruth.

“Plus, he likes us,” added Carmilla.

“Well that is fortunate,” said Mattie, “but I think I'm quite put out from any other pursuits tonight.”

“Works for me,” said Ruth, “those pursuits will probably be easier in New York anyhow.”

“You're quite right,” said Mattie, composing herself, “but for now, darlings, I think it's time to get you home.”

x-x-x

Ruth walked quietly through the darkened house, slipping silently into the bedroom. Scout was fast asleep, but Ava was still up reading.

“You're back earlier than I expected,” she said, putting her book down.

“Same here, but it was a quieter night than we were expecting,” said Ruth as she walked into the bathroom to wash up.

“Oh, so you didn't have a good time?” Ava asked.

“I didn't say that,” replied Ruth, “it was just about perfect for me. Coaxed to go out or not, I still wasn't in the mood for a big tear. Especially not through town.”

“Let me guess though,” said Ava, “you're already planning that big tear.”

“You better believe it,” said Ruth as she tossed her clothes into the hamper and slipped into bed, “it's gonna be one for the ages.”

“Good. I'm looking forward to it,” said Ava, turning off the light and resting her head on Ruth's shoulder.

  
  


“Wait, what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all!   
> Just want to let you know that for the month of December I'll be trying my Xmas song fic challenge again. Four fics from four successive points in time based on four holiday songs. What I'd really appreciate are some suggestions of songs I can use as prompts. Last year was 'Baby, it's cold outside', 'Grandma got run over by a reindeer', 'I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus' and 'Silver Bells' so those are off the table, but I'd appreciate your suggestions.


	78. The Prettiest Sight to See

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The holiday season just sneaks right up on you.

_ “Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way…” _

Danny sang absently as she worked her way down the hallway, using a staple gun to hang up garland in the corner.

_ “...oh what fun, it is to ride, in a one-horse open sleigh,”  _ sang Kirsch as he moved along the other side of the hall, “hey dude? does this look alright?”

Danny turned around to look at the progress he had made, smiling at the way he’d tangled himself in the loose end of the garland string. “Yeah, Kirsch it looks great. You need help?” She gestured at the way he seemed to be on the verge of tripping.

“What?” he looked down, shuffling a little against the restraining tangle before looking back, smiling like a puppy, “naw, keeps it off the floor. I used to do this as a kid to help my mom put up the christmas tree.”

“Really?” asked Danny.

“Yeah. She’d have me hold the tinsel while she put up the lights,” he said, “she’d wrap the tinsel around me and said to do a good job of holding it so she’d know it was alright while she put the lights up.”

Danny bit back a laugh, smiling at him sympathetically. “Oh, Kirsch…”

He kept going, oblivious of her expression as he stapled another length into place, “it’s kinda embarrassing how old I was before I figured out what she was up to, but by then I found holding like this easier.”

“You do?”

“I mean, yeah.” He held his hands up. “See both hands free and the garland…” He wiggled his hips, forcing Danny to bite her lip to keep from laughing. “...is clean and untangled.” He smiled innocently at her.

Danny opened and closed her mouth several times as she tried to form words without a mirthful laugh escaping.

“Hey Bro-zo,” said Mel, coming out of her room with an empty glass, “I thought the idea was to decorate the hallway, not you.”

Kirsch smiled at Mel “Well, we are, y’see—”

“Yeah. I heard,” she deadpanned, “you still look ridiculous. Like the world’s bro-est tree.”

“I know! That’s the best part,” said Kirsch, his smile broadening, “if it’s not fun, what’s the point?”.

Danny glanced over at Mel’s contemptuous expression, bracing for the inevitable barb.

“Huh, alright,” said Mel, much to Danny’s surprise, “guess there is a bit of sense rattling around in there. Who knew?”

Kirsch grinned at the ‘compliment’ as Mel made her way off towards the kitchen.

“That was… uncharacteristically nice of her,” said Danny, looking suspiciously after Mel as she returned to hanging garland.

“Nah, she’s alright,” said Kirsch as he pirouetted to give himself some more slack, “sure, she’s a bit harsh sometimes, but that’s just her thing, y’know?”

Danny turned and smiled at him as he stapled another loop in place. “Kirsch?” He turned to look at her as walked over to him, pulling him into a hug. “Never change.”

Kirsch wrapped his arms around her back and returned the hug with a quick squeeze before the two returned to their task.

“Yo Lawrence!” called Mel, “you and tannenbro better get down here!”

Danny and Kirsch shared a look before turning to go see what Mel needed. Danny made it just a few steps before she heard a ‘thump’ from behind her. She put a hand to her face as she turned back to see Kirsch wiggling the garland off of his ankles. 

“Ok, so it has drawbacks, but I stand by my traditions,” he said, scrambling to his feet.

“Whatever you want to believe,” said Danny, patting him on the head.

He just grinned. “See? This is why you’re awesome.”

“Today, if you wouldn’t mind,” Mel yelled as they finally headed down to the common rooms where she was standing, arms crossed and glaring.

“What’s up?” asked Danny.

“What do you see here?” said Mel, nodding in the direction she was looking.

“A christmas tree?” said Danny, before doing a double take, “wait, I thought we weren’t putting up the tree until tomorrow?”

“We weren’t,” said Mel, “my bigger concern is that beyond the three of us, there are only two other people here right now and they’re both in the kitchen making sufganiyot. So either Annie and Jen decided to leave their simmering pot of oil unattended to somehow erect and decorate a fifteen foot tree, by themselves, in less than hour, completely silently no less, or there is something going on, and I intend to find out what.”

Danny walked over to the tree as Mel turned on her heel and strode towards the basement. She curiously examined one of the branches, the colourful glass ball on the end bobbing merrily at the motion. Tilting her head, she got down on her knees to look underneath.

“Well, even if you don’t know how it got up, your tree looks great,” commented Kirsch.

“That’s the problem,” said Danny, “it’s not our tree.”

“What?” asked Kirsch.

“Summers always have a live tree that the dryads keep planted through the rest of the year, same one every winter,” said Danny, “the Summers have been using our current one for nearly a decade; should have a few more years before it gets too tall for the ceiling.”

“And this tree is… dead?” said Kirsch.

“Dying, it’s a cut tree,” she said, “really fortunate that it’s not ours in that case. This is a pine of some sort, ours is a fir.”

“Heh, cause you’re wolves,” joked Kirsch before a quick glare from Danny wiped the smile from his face, “sorry.”

“Anyways, if this isn’t ours that means that ours should be…” Danny led Kirsch through the kitchen —where Annie and Jen seemed done with donuts and had begun a full powdered sugar fight— and out the back door where a lush and even more massive tree stood, supported by a pot that looked to be made of earth and roots, “...right here.”

“How do you even get that inside?” he asked.

“Sorry dude,” she said, “Summer secret.”

“Oh go on, tell him,” said Mel, coming out of the lodge with a bow and loaded quiver, “I could use a little target practice before we find our real quarry.”

Kirsch yelped and ducked behind Danny.

Danny rolled her eyes. “So what’s the plan?”

“Well, option A is to do thorough research, looking at all the clues and exploring all possible culprits until we find the best course of action,” said Mel, “or option B is we assume it has something to do with this jack-in-the-box of a school, that we for some reason decided it would be a great idea to attend, and head toward the centre where presumably we’ll find the problem and put a suitable amount of violence towards stopping it.”

“And here I often think we have nothing in common,” said Danny, “but y’know, we have our moments. Let’s roll.”

“So wait,” said Kirsch, scampering after the two women, “which option did we pick? Is it A cause I can get study snacks? Dudes?”

x-x-x

“Well… this is not quite what I was expecting,” said Mel, calmly pulling an arrow out of an inflatable santa as is slowly deflated.

Beside her, Kirsch gaped in silent horror at the melting childhood hero.

“Well, I can’t say I’m completely shocked,” said Danny, looking around the at the lights donning almost every spare edge and railing they could be attached to, “the twinkle lights on the eldritch front gate is a nice touch.”

“Well, first things first, I’ll go rough up the Zetas, you look for a source,” said Mel.

“Wait, we didn’t have anything to do with this,” protested Kirsch.

“Yeah, I doubt this is the Zetas,” said Danny, “motivation aside, I really doubt they have the capacity.” Danny subtly scratched the side of her head with her finger.

“Yeah!” agreed Kirsch, before quietly asking Danny, “capacity for what?”

“Maybe,” said Mel, “but I made the trip into campus, want to make sure I get something out of it?” She smirked at them before walking towards the Zeta house, the greek letters noticeably entangled in holly branches.

“Wait… but…” protested Kirsch, “can you at least try and get my mp3 player back from Doug? He took it last week.”

Mel threw up the horns as she walked away, but didn’t look back.

“Alright, where should we start? The alchemy tower?” Danny turned to look at the structure, which seemed to be chiming with the peals of church bells. “It’s not even that kind of tower,” she muttered quietly to herself.

“Uh… D-bear?” said Kirsch, “maybe your little-nerd-girlfriend can help.” He pointed over to where a excited and gesticulating Laura was flailing, trying to get their attention. Not far away, Carmilla stood under an overhang in one of the few patches not covered by snow.

“Well, if anything, I get to see my little-nerd girlfriend, so I’d call it a win.” They went over and Laura leapt up, wrapping her arms around Danny’s neck and peppering her jaw with kisses.

“Danny, isn’t this great? It’s like instant holidays!” exclaimed Laura, “you’ve got to see the bookstore! Goodbye calculus textbooks, hello Christmas Story toy window.”

“Yeah, such a great change,” said Carmilla from the wall.

“Don’t mind her, she's just cranky cause she got woken up by the glee club caroling.”

“I am not cranky,” said Carmilla crankily, “I just tend to get a little suspicious when things around here change on their own. Usually means something has gotten loose and ‘something’ is very rarely friendly, if ever.”

“Oh, I don't know,” said Mel as she rejoined the group, “certain… _ folk _ , have had their benefits. Oh, here's your mp3 player.”

“Oh, thanks. I… is that blood?” asked Kirsch, pointing to Mel's forehead.

“What?” She reached up and touched the red smear before looking at her fingertips and tasting it, smiling satisfactorily while Kirsch looked faint. “Heh, no. One of them whipped a handful of pomegranate seeds at me when I burst in. I wouldn't leave evidence like this.”

“Yes,” said Laura, “cause that's our worry, not that you got hurt or something.”

“I'm touched,” said Mel before looking at Carmilla “do we know if it is... an old friend? Did Ms. Frizzle dust off the old books?

“After the fright I gave her last time? I doubt it,” said Carmilla, “besides, she was baking up a storm last I checked on her. Something about the apparating sweets was ‘off-putting’ and she needed to do it right.”

“Well, maybe it's—” Laura's phone rang. “Hello?”

_ “Hey L!”  _ came Laf's voice.

“Oh hi Laf. One sec.” She put the phone on speaker. “What's up?”

_ “You guys have got to come over to the cafeteria! It's a huge Christmas party over here!” _

“The cafeteria staff are letting students get away with that?” asked Danny.

“ _ Let?”  _ said Laf,  _ “Danny, they're throwing it.” _

The group shared bewildered looks.

“We'll be right there,” said Danny.

It took them just a short time to traverse the snowy quad. Inside, the usually drab cafeteria was awash in Christmas cheer. Trees, lights and decorations filled every nook and cranny. Hundreds of students were enjoying the atmosphere, eating cookies and drinking what smelled like mulled cider.

“This is amazing!” squeaked Laura.

“I know, right?” said Laf, walking up with a piece of shortbread in hand, “apparently some old coven sister came by to visit who's specialty is Yuletide, so they decided to celebrate. Nana Kline or something like that.”

“And they,” said Mel, “the group of scarily talented witches that, for some reason I've never figured out, run our cafeteria, have now bent their usually reserved talents to throwing a giant holiday celebration… well, this obviously isn't related at all?”

“It isn't?” said Kirsch, “too bad, this seems like a fun place to hang out. Where should we try next?”

Mel just looked at him with disbelief while Danny posted him reassuringly on the shoulder.

“Kirsch, do you remember the conversation we had about sarcasm?” asked Danny.

“Yeah. What? Oh,” said Kirsch, grinning as he caught up, “so what should we do?”

“You should help yourselves to some cookies and cider and just enjoy the party!” said a woman in Bavarian clothes whom nobody had seen walking up, “Dig into what Mama Klaus and her sisters whipped up for you, indulge yourselves.” She held out a plate of gingerbread that everyone was fairly certain she hadn't had a moment ago.

“Thank you,” said Laura optimistically, though she found herself somewhat disturbed by the dismembered gingerbread man she was now holding.

“Try it,” said Laf, who now sported a different cookie in each hand, “it's really good. I don't know if I can stop eating.”

“uh, Laura. This doesn't seem suspicious to you?” asked Carmilla.

“Well, a little, I suppose,” she said, “but it's Christmas, what's the worst that could happen?”

“Exactly,” agreed Mama Klaus, “Weihnachten is a happy, carefree time.”

“Hold up, seriously?” said Mel, “do the words ‘Hansel and Gretel’ mean nothing to you people?”

“Well yes,” said Danny, “but…” Her eyes fell on Laf who was now holding a cookie platter of their own, eating cookie after cookie without break. She turned to Mama Klaus. “Yeah, you're totally some kind of cookie witch who eats people, aren't you?”

“Nein,” she said, “I’ve reformed. I'm a new witch. Turning people into gingerbread and baking them alive is wrong and I can stop whenever I want to.”

“What about the reindeer?” teased one of the cooks from the counter.

“A minor relapse! They opened a Santa's village right next door. There were jingling bells all day and night! It was all I could do to get some sleep.”

Everyone in the group looked at Mama Klaus with concern—except for Kirsch who just looked heartbroken about the reindeer.

“Alright, so you're not trying to eat us,” said Laura, “what about…?” She gestured at Laf who now looked downright annoyed to be eating cookies.

“Oh that’s just a side effect of the recipe, it won't turn her—”

“Them,” everyone corrected reflexively.

“Them, tut mir leid, into a cookie or anything. Actually, I've always used the same recipe, I don't know how to make cookies that don't do that.”

As if on cue, the doors swung open revealing Perry laden with bags, wearing an incredibly loud holiday sweater.

Carmilla smirked. “Ask and ye shall receive.”

“Hello everyone,” chirped Perry, “I came as fast as I could!”

“How did you know to come at all?” asked Danny.

Perry shared a glance with Mel and Carmilla. “Just instinct really.” She shoved a butter tart into LaFontaine's hand, who bit into it with relief, putting down the cookies at last.

“That's what I'm talking about,” they said.

Mama Klaus’ eyes went wide. “Amazing, may I?”

“Of course.” Perry held out a container from which Mama Klaus took a gingerbread tree.

“So you could tell the cookies were enchanted?” asked Danny.

“Well, yes, but that's hardly unusual. Most food on campus is enchanted, especially when it appears from thin air,” said Perry.

“So what was 'off-putting’ about them?”

“Well… mine are better,” said Perry matter-of-factly.

“Goodness, this is wunderbar! I must have the recipe,” exclaimed Mama Claus.

“Of course!” said Perry, “the key is to start with a really dark molasses…”

“Hey!” snapped Mel, “what about everything still being all ‘Hallmark moment’ out there?”

“It's just a spell Lebkuchen,” said Mama Klaus, “my sisters said things had to be back to normal when we were done. It'll fade by morning.”

“Oh…” said Mel, her shoulders slumping.

“I know. All good things,” said Mama Klaus before turning back to Perry, “so, lemon zest?” 

“You're just disappointed that you didn't get to shoot anything, aren't you?” Danny asked quietly.

Mel nodded her head melancholically.

Danny chuckled. “Did you want to go and try to knock the reindeer off the display on the Robespierre building?”

“Yeah, y'know. I would.”

“Alright,” said Danny, “hey Babes? I'm going back out for a bit. Kirsch? You wanna join us while we shoot Blitzen?”

“Uh, no thanks. I'm fine in here.”

“Suit yourself,” said Mel, shouldering her view, “c'mon Lawrence, let's go make Rudolph regret joining in the reindeer games.”

“Bring me back an antler,” Carmilla called after them.

“Will do!” replied Danny as she and Mel left to enjoy the holidays as only Summers could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Christmas chapter number one. For this one, I used "It's Beginning to Look A Lot like Christmas" as suggested by IfCarmillametWillow (sidenote: I'd watch the hell outta that crossover). I hadn't expected Mama Klaus to show up when I started this one, but hey, the Scooby gang never met her in this timeline so she's still alive and kicking to write. Lucky me!
> 
> As always, I'm still open for suggestions of songs to use, I've got plenty so far, but it's nice to have choice ;).
> 
> Joyeaux Nöel!


	79. As We Go Along

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A walk on a snowy winter's day can be so much fun

“Alright, who’s bright idea was this?”

Laura’s feet slipped underneath her as she teetered on the ice until a familiar fuzzy presence pressed itself up against her side, allowing her to steady herself. She buried her hand into the soft red fur, letting Danny support her as she regained her balance.

Up ahead, Carmilla pivoted around and stared at Laura, her tail swishing with irritation.

“Ah… right. This was my bright idea,” said Laura, worrying her lip.

Under her hand, Laura could feel Danny shaking as she quietly chuffed with laughter.

“Hey, c’mon. It seemed like a good idea on the shore!” Laura unsteadily pushed herself forward, feeling very much like a newborn fawn. “It’s absolutely gorgeous out here and you guys come this way all the time.”

Carmilla held up her unsheathed claws, wiggling them like fingers.

“Ah, ah, ah. Don’t you start with that, you know I’ve heard about your first sojourn out here,” said Laura as Carmilla’s ears folded back, “I may have wandered out here without claws, but at least I never forgot about a set I had and didn’t use.”

Danny’s quiet chuffing erupted into yelping barks as she broke into laughter.

Carmilla yowled sourly before stalking off towards the far shore, tail swishing dangerously.

Watching the panther go, Danny let out a short whine.

“You’re right, we should be nicer to her,” agreed Laura.

Danny looked over at Laura, inclining her head towards their wife.

“Yeah, I should be fine… for a few seconds at least,” said Laura, “it looks like there is some snow over there I might be able to get some grip on.”

Danny yipped cheerfully and gently edged away from Laura before pushing forward, like a puppy on linoleum, accelerating cartoonishly slowly as her bounding paws found little grip. However, years of practice kept her legs beneath her and before long she was speeding towards the panther.

A single quick bark was the only warning Carmilla got before three hundred pounds of playful wolf bowled her over, sending the two of them careening across the frozen lake. Laura broke into peals of laughter at their antics, finally having found a patch of show she could stand on relatively stably. 

Slowly, she carefully picked her way from snow patch to snow patch, pausing every time to watch the two play. Her progress was halting, but she was enjoying herself nonetheless. She continued on until she was staggering her way towards another safe patch when a particularly large 'whump’ drew her attention. She turned to Danny and Carmilla collapsed in an undignified heap, with Carmilla actually sitting on Danny's head.

Once again, Laura broke out laughing but this proved to be her undoing as the distraction allowed her balance to get away from her on the uncovered ice. She tried in vain to steady herself, but it was no use; her feet were going on an adventure and she wasn't invited. As she fell, she tried to twist to catch herself but her motion was suddenly arrested by something grabbing the scruff of her coat. For several seconds, she hung suspended above the ice, looking at a surprised Danny and Carmilla untangle themselves to get over to her.

Using the current reprieve from gravity to her advantage, Laura got her feet back under herself and got her weight back on her own legs, prompting her rescuer to let go. Satisfied she wasn't going to go flying again, Laura turned to see who saved her from a nasty spill to find the friendly, lupine face of her brother-in-law.

“Zach!” she exclaimed happily, throwing her arms around him, “my hero.”

He chuffed happily as she pulled back, licking her playfully on the cheek before fixing Carmilla and Danny with an admonishing stare. They had the good sense to look chagrined, before Laura interjected.

“Zach, it's alright. It's not their fault,” she said, “they wanted to go around the long way. I'm the one who wanted to come out onto the ice.”

He tilted his head inquisitively.

“Look at it out here,” she said, gesturing at the frozen vista around them, “it's magical.”

Zach followed her gaze before emphatically sweeping his paw across to exposed ice.

“Yeah, hindsight 20/20 to be certain,” said Laura, “but I'm out here now, and closer to where we're going than where we came from.”

He woofed in question, his gaze shifting to the near shoreline.

“Got it in one,” said Laura, her hand moving to rest on her stomach.

He gave Danny and Carmilla another annoyed look, although this time it was answered with an annoyed look of their own. Shaking his head, he let his tongue loll out, smiling at Laura, before laying down on the ice. He tilted his head, gesturing to his back.

“Seriously?” asked Laura with barely contained glee.

Zach half-barked, snapping his muzzle shut playfully.

“Alright,” she said, gingerly throwing a leg over his back and buried her hands into his fur, getting a hold.

Once she was settled, he carefully stood up and began padding his way carefully to the shore, Danny and Carmilla in tow, though the two still seemed to be delighting in shoving and tripping each other across the ice. Both Laura and Zach chuckled at their antics. As they reached the shore, Laura got ready to get down but, much to her surprise, Zach kept moving.

“Y’know, I appreciate the lift off the lake, but you don’t have to carry me all the way,” said Laura, “my legs work just fine.”

He turned his head just enough to look at her, his tongue hanging out comically. He stopped walking for a moment and nickered like a horse, scratching a paw at the ground like a hoof.

Laura burst out laughing. “Alright, chestnut. If you insist. Should we get some bells? Really complete the experience?”

Zach snorted equinely before continuing on his way.

“I’m not quite certain how you made that sound without lips, but I’ll take it as a no,” Laura said, a lilt of laughter still colouring her voice. The amusement was infectious as she could not only hear the laughter of her wives, but feel the deep vibration of Zach’s chuckle beneath her.

They continued on in silence for the next few minutes, enjoying the muffled peace of the snow covered woods. Before long, they emerged from the trees to see a very familiar looking building with a large solarium extending into the clearing they were walking through.

As they approached, Danny ran ahead and howled, the clarion call quickly getting swallowed by the gentle quiet once more. Right away, the door of the solarium opened and a gaggle of children came swarming out, some on their own, some in wheelchairs, but all bundled for the snow and smiling like it was already christmas day. Just behind them, several adults, equally bundled, came out as well.

“Midnight!”

“Kitty!”

“I love snow, let’s make a snowman!”

“Ginger!” cried one girl who crashed into Danny, who rolled over into the snow obligingly.

Zach laid down in the snow to let Laura off and several children surrounded them.

“Wow, he let you ride him? I wanna turn!”

Laura smiled at the boy, looking at Zach who gave her a nod before she hefted the child up onto Zach’s back. “Now hold on, alright?”

“Kay!” chirruped the boy as Zach started off at a gentle trot.

Laura smiled, rubbing her stomach once more as she made her way over to the door where a woman in scrubs was standing. “Hey Sasha, they ready for me?”

“Yup,” she said, following Laura into the hospital, “you sure you’re okay heading up alone?”

“I’m not alone, you’re with me!” joked Laura, “but yes, I am. It’s not like they’re sitting at home watching TV and drinking beer, they’re playing with sick kids. Besides, it’s nothing mind blowing like an ultrasound today, just a few blood and urine tests.” 

“Don’t need someone to hold your hand while they draw blood?”

“Please. I am an adult,” said Laura, “as long as I can hold Sir Mr. Honeypaws, I’ll be just fine.”

Sasha chuckled as they hit the elevator button to go up.

x-x-x

“Okay, are you going to tell us why you’re in such a foul mood?” asked Laura as Carmilla shifted back and walked into the house, “are you upset cause I didn’t get a souvenir bean picture this time? Cause the one on the fridge is gonna be pretty much the same for now.”

“No… I know you weren’t doing that,” said Carmilla, “it’s… it’s stupid.”

“So you always say, but it never is,” said Danny.

“Trust me, this is stupid,” said Carmilla, wandering into the living room.

Laura and Danny shared a glance before pursuing Carmilla into the room. Danny paused, holding out a hand to stop Laura. Silently, she pointed over to the thick woolen blanket Sue had knit for them for their first Christmas in their old off-campus apartment. Laura nodded in understanding and went to go get it as Danny moved towards the front of the room, turning on the gas fireplace. On her way back to the couch, she turned the lights off, leaving the fire as the only light in the room, as Laura got herself and Carmilla settled under the blanket. Danny soon joined them, snuggling in on Carmilla’s other side.

They sat in silence, enjoying the warmth of the fire filling the room. Danny quietly stroked Carmilla’s hair while Laura rubbed her leg reassuringly.

“It’s Julie,” Carmilla said quietly.

“Julie?” asked Laura, “I thought she was in remission.”

“She is,” said Carmilla, “and I’m glad. She’s better now and her family is alright! Just…”

“You miss playing with her,” finished Danny.

“...yeah,” said Carmilla, “see I told you it was stupid. ‘I wish a little girl was still sick so I could play with her in the snow’.

“Stop that,” said Danny, hugging Carmilla close, “you’re allowed to miss her.”

“Actually…”  added Laura, “you still can. Play with her, I mean.”

“Huh?” said Carmilla.

“Well, I was chatting with Sasha while I was waiting and apparently, she introduced Julie to Chance and Nova. They’re a little younger than her, but she seems delighted to have more wolves to play with. I doubt she’d protest if her old cat friend joined the fray.”

“Well, that sounds... rather nice,” said Carmilla, notably relaxing, “I’ll have to call Eddie to see if I can come by next time.”

“You should do that,” said Laura, “but I think for now we need to enjoy the fire, get some cocoa and discuss where we’re going to put up our tree. It’s our dress rehearsal for baby’s first christmas after all.”

“That sounds like an amazing plan,” said Danny, “can you make it? Yours always tastes the best.”

Laura chuckled. “Fine, but only cause you’re right… and kinda cause I owe you from that whole ice debacle earlier.”

“Sounds fair,” said Carmilla, “it was your bright idea after all.”

Carmilla laughed when the heavy blanket found itself wrapped around her head as Laura got up to head to the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! This week's chapter is based on "Winter Wonderland" suggested by Ashkela. Thanks for the prompt! More old friends showing up with this one, you'd think this was the time of year for that or something. Weird ;).
> 
> Hope you all liked it!
> 
> Feliz Navidad!


	80. Make My Wish Come True

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes all you want is what's right in front of you.

“Come in, come in. It’s freezing out there!”

Beverley held the door open as Laura, Danny and Carmilla trudged in, covered in snow with teenagers in tow and bags in hand. Bev quickly closed the door behind them as they set about shedding coats and lifting their noses to get their first whiff of the aromas that suffused the home

“Thanks Gran,” said Danny, shaking the melting flakes from her hair, “who’s here?”

“Aside from your grandfather and I, you’re the first to get here.”

“Nice!” said Danny, “first dibs on the peppermint bark!” With a gleeful smile, Danny scampered off through her childhood home.

“Awp!” came Sue’s voice, from the kitchen.

“Ow!” yelped Danny.

“That’s for dessert and you know it,” scolded Sue.

As the rest of the family entered the kitchen, Danny was visibly pouting as her fingers drummed the counter-top.

“Merry Christmas!” said Sue, grabbing the plate in front of her and holding it out to the kids, “peppermint bark?”

Drix and Mercy happily took pieces while Charlie declined with a smile.

“What? But…” stammered Danny.

“Grandmother’s privilege,” said Sue, placing the plate into the corner, on the far side of the kitchen from Danny.

“Sorry babe, it’s a lost cause,” said Carmilla, patting Danny on the shoulder.

“Maybe have some eggnog?” suggested Laura.

“But I don’t want eggnog,” muttered Danny, trying to give her mother the best puppy dog eyes that she could. 

“You know that won’t work on me young lady. I don’t know why…”

The conversation faded out as the kids made their way into the front room Drix and Mercy took a seat near the fire, still happily crunching away at their treat, while Charlie took a seat on the couch by the picture window, watching the snow as it caught the colours from the christmas lights adorning the eaves. Unconsciously, she pulled her knees to her chest and sighed.

“Could you be any more melodramatic?” said Drix, grinning at Charlie.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” groused Charlie, tightening her grip.

“‘Oh woe is me, stuck here by myself on this cold wintery night. If only my secret girlfriend were here to comfort me.’” Drix grinned while Mercy had to slap a hand over her mouth to keep from laughing.

Charlie went wide-eyed in a panic. “Shut up,” she hissed, eyeing the doorway back to the kitchen.

“Charlie, it’s alright,” said Mercy, “Moms are currently distracted trying to Ocean’s Eleven the peppermint bark.”

“Yeah, Char,” agreed Drix, “I’m a bit of a jerk, but I’m not a complete ass.”

“Debatable,” joked Charlie, “but you’ve always had my back.” She smiled warmly at him before turning her attentions back out the window. 

They spent the next few minutes in comfortable silence, just the sounds of Bing Crosby filling the room, until the flash of headlights outside grabbed Charlie’s attention.

She watched hopefully until she realized it wasn’t the car she was looking for. She smiled and waved at the newcomers warmly as they got out of their car, moving to the front door to let them in.

“Seriously? Who invented this weather?” said Chance as he came in the door.

“I’m not sure, but someone should take it up with a manager,” replied Charlie, holding the door as Logan followed his husband into the house, carrying little Abbey.

“Merry Christmas, Charlie,” said Logan, putting down the little girl who immediately ran into the house. A chorus of happy voices came from the kitchen as she scampered in.

“Merry Christmas, Logan,” she said, “how’s the day been for you?”

“Wonderful!” said Chance, “tiring but wonderful. Little one woke up at… was it six this morning?”

“Yep,” agreed Logan.

“So we opened presents early, had a nice breakfast and then enjoyed a family nap before getting ready,” Chance said.

“Six? Wow, I remember those days, but I can’t imagine it now,” said Charlie, “I don’t think we got into it until… ten, I think.”

“Not that moms didn’t try to get things started earlier,” said Drix, “they were poking me about eight, for all the good it did.”

Chance smiled. “Sleep like the dead, eh?”

Drix groaned and dropped his face into his hand. “I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.”

Everyone else just laughed.

“Well, the rest of the grown-ups, though I use the term loosely given Mom’s mood tonight, are in the kitchen if you wanna say hi,” said Charlie, “Abbey’s the first little one here, but Kirsch and Betty, and Elsie and Hunter are all coming with their respective hordes, to say nothing of the rest of the Lawrence clan, so there’ll be plenty of playmates for her.”

“And then some,” said Bev as she came into the room to give her grandson and in-law hugs, “we’ve already got Elf ready to go on the big screen in the basement to keep all of them happy.”

“With the shelves properly secured, I trust,” asked Chance with a smile.

Bev rolled her eyes. “Yes, Chance. Just like you ask every year, without it being any funnier, the shelves are still bolted to the wall as they have been for the last twenty years.”

“Excellent,” said Charlie, “I’ll get my bouldering gear.”

“No, freehand it!” said Mercy.

“Forgive me if I prefer safety,” said Charlie.

“Alright, you’re forgiven for preferring  _ boring _ ,” jeered Mercy.

“Okay, okay,” said Bev, “come on. The eggnog is out and I think we’re in for some entertainment shortly if I’m reading Danny correctly.”

“The peppermint bark again?” asked Logan.

“Of course,” said Bev, leading the men to the kitchen.

Charlie was about to return to her perch when another knock came from the door. She turned back and opened it to reveal Hazel with a large bags in her hands.

Without really thinking, Charlie immediately started to move towards Hazel to try and kiss her when she spotted Laf and Perry coming up the walk. She wrapped her arms around Hazel’s shoulders, making do with a hug for now.

“Later, babe,” Hazel whispered in her ear.

“Merry Christmas!” exclaimed Laf, putting down their own bags to wrap them both into a hug.

“Merry Christmas, Laf,” said Charlie, “Merry Christmas, Auntie Perry!”

“Merry Christmas, sweetie,” said Perry, kicking her shoes off, “you’ll have to forgive me, these bags are quite heavy.” Still in her coat, she continued on towards the kitchen, holding more bags than seemed reasonable.

“Don’t ask,” said Laf, “I’m not certain how she’s holding them all either.” They hung up their coat and followed her into the house.

Sky bounced in with a spring in her step. “Hi Charlie! Happy Holidays!”

Charlie laughed, wrapping Sky into a hug. “Happy Holidays.”

“Any of the other kids here yet?” Sky asked as she ran over and jumped on Drix.

“Not unless you count Abbey,” said Mercy as she came up to give Hazel a hug.

“Well good,” said Hazel, “means we can exchange gifts with a bit more privacy.” She looked at Charlie meaningfully.

Mercy raised an eyebrow. “You two probably want to save that for a bit  _ more _ privacy.”

Hazel laughed. “I know that, you twerp. I'm not carrying these bags for my health after all.”

“Come on, Hazel,” teased Drix, “feel that burn.”

“I’ll help you feel a burn,” said Hazel, “where’s the garlic?”

“In the kitchen, with the parents,” said Charlie. She glanced at Hazel’s lips before biting her own. Cautiously, she glanced towards the door to the kitchen, only to find her Moms coming through with Laf and Perry.

“Present time!” said Laura, practically vibrating with excitement as she scampered over to the door, grabbing the bags they’d left there before going to sit on the loveseat.

Charlie and Hazel shared a glance of disappointment before going to go sit at opposite ends of the couch by the window. Behind them, the collective parents also shared glances of disappointment over the girls continued silence about their relationship.

“When they’re ready,” Danny said quietly, repeating the unofficial mantra they'd adopted. 

Any looks of disappointed were short lived however as gift-exchanging began in a maelstrom of shredded paper and flying ribbon.

“Here,” said Hazel, handing a small present to Charlie.

Charlie grinned before peeling the paper from the small box. Opening the plain white box, she found an eight-pointed star pendant on a silver chain. She picked it up and turned it over in her hands, on the back was a word written in Sumerian cuneiform.

“An artifact for the future archeologist, or the closest I could manage at least,” Hazel said with a small smile.

“I love it,” said Charlie, “put it on me?”

“Of course,” said Hazel, leaning forward to take the necklace in her hands. She began to lean forward, intending to put the jewellery on face to face, when she stopped, remembering they weren’t alone.

They both glanced into the room. Carmilla was looking towards them but was focussed on the pendant, a soft smile on her face.

Charlie turned her back towards Hazel, gathering her long hair to one side to uncover her neck. Hazel deftly looped the necklace over her head and brought the chain back to clasp it.

“Charlie that looks so pretty!” said Laura, scooting over, “Hazel, you have a good eye.”

“Thanks Auntie Laura,” said Hazel.

“What is it?” Laura asked.

“I… uh… don’t know,” said Hazel hastily, “I just noticed the sumerian on it and thought Charlie would appreciate it.”

“Huh, very clever,” said Laura, before scooting away, “wait, Perry, that’s from me. I wanna watch!”

Hazel sagged with relief as the attention left the two of them. She turned to look at Charlie, who was examining the pendant with a goofy smile. Charlie looked up and Hazel smiled so brightly as she could tell that Charlie knew exactly what it was.

“It’s perfect,” said Charlie quietly, reaching over to gently brush her fingers across the back of Hazel’s hand, “I hope you like my gift as much, I don’t think it’s quite as clever.” She handed a brightly wrapped package to Hazel.

Hazel kept her voice low, turning her hand to return the caresses as they kept their hands hidden behind Charlie’s present to her. “The gift isn’t what matters. It’s that it’s coming from you.”

Across the room, Laura and Danny cuddled up to Carmilla as she subtly watched Hazel open what appeared to be a new helmet with a strand of DNA painted down the side.

“So…” mused Laura, “what is it?”

“It’s a symbol of Inanna,” said Carmilla, “Sumerian goddess of love, among other things.”

“Love?” said Danny, “and they still won’t tell us. You can’t help but feel a bit hurt.”

“They have their reasons, even if we don’t get it,” said Laura, “c’mon, let’s go back to the kitchen and give them some privacy.” They began to get up when another knock came from the door. “Or not.”

“Dudes! Merry Christmas,” exclaimed Kirsch as Danny opened the door for him, scooping her into a hug, “I hope we’re not too late.”

Danny glanced at Charlie and Hazel who’d completely separated. She smiled ruefully. “No, you’re right on time,” she said as all the Kirschlings made their way into the house.

x-x-x

“So what did Santa get you?” Hazel asked Charlie as she tore off the wrapping paper. They were sitting in the now abandoned basement while the kids had run off to see the jolly old elf.

Charlie opened the box and lifted out a bronze bracelet with a series of charms. Along the chain was a wolf, a cat, a book and a puzzle piece.

“Ooh, pretty,” said Hazel, “and oddly fitting.”

“He’s really good. Moms swear that he brings the gifts himself, without prompting, but they’re always perfect.” Charlie shrugged before prodding Hazel..”Open yours!”

Hazel tore into hers to find a similar bracelet made of copper with charms of a beaker, a measuring cup, a dance shoe and… a puzzle piece.

“Okay, he’s good, but what’s the puzzle piece?” said Hazel, holding it up.

“I don’t know,” said Charlie, examining her own as well, “wait…”

She brought the two charms together and found they slotted together perfectly, the light click of embedded magnets holding the charms firmly..

“Correction. He’s  _ really _ good,” said Hazel as they separated the two bracelets. She looked over hers with a smile. “This has been a really good Christmas. I just wish…”

“That we could have made it a little more complete?” said Charlie and Hazel nodded. “I know, but—”

“Hey guys?” called Danny down the stairs.

“Yeah?” answered Charlie.

“Pack’s going for a run and everyone else is gonna play in the snow in the backyard. You guys wanna join in?” Danny said.

Charlie and Hazel shared a smile.

“No thanks, Mom,” said Charlie, “we’re just gonna chill.”

“Okay, we’ll be back in a bit,” said Danny before the sound of the basement door closing shut could be heard from above.

“So what was that you were saying?” said Hazel, a sparkle in her eyes.

“Well, I was saying ‘I know, but… we don’t have any mistletoe’,” said Charlie with barely contained glee, “it’s a tragedy.”

“I think we’ll make do,” said Hazel, taking Charlie’s face in her hands and softly kissing her, “I’ve been wanting to do that all night.”

“I know. Me too,” said Charlie, moving in for another peck, “how—” kiss, ”—long—” kiss,” —do you—” kiss “—think—” kiss, “we have?”

“Charlie?” said Hazel.

“Yes’m?”

“Shut up,” said Hazel, pushing in and driving Charlie into the couch cushions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we take another jump forward for Christmas chapter three. This one was based on 'All I Want For Christmas Is You' as suggested by IfCarmillametWillow. 
> 
> I hope you all are having a good holiday with minimal stress.
> 
> Fröhlich Weinachten!


	81. May Your Days Be Merry And Bright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What makes the holidays complete depends on where you come from

“Hmph.”

“What's wrong grumpy cat?” Laura walked up behind Carmilla, wrapping her arms around Carmilla's midsection as she stood at the living room window.

“What do you see out there?” asked Carmilla.

Laura rested her chin on Carmilla's shoulder, following her gaze outside. “Our beautiful children playing in the snow with our equally beautiful grandchildren.”

“'Snow’,” said Carmilla, making air quotes, “I'm not sure that half-melted, icy mess out there really qualifies.”

Laura frowned. She couldn't really argue with Carmilla on that point. The temperature had only just barely remained at freezing since the last, admittedly pitiful, snowfall. Now the temperature had begun to rise, exposing the tips of the covered grass, and even entire patches of lawn near trees where the pack had been thinner, as the snow began to melt in the weak winter sunlight.

An explosion of snow kicked up near the deck where Pru made a sudden change of direction as she bounded around the yard, pursuing or pursued by her siblings, though which was anyone's guess.

In the corner of the yard, Arsen and Jaq gently lobbed snowballs at Levy as she swooped and looped around them, hooting joyfully. Nearby, Drix kept a patient, if slightly nervous, eye on the group. 

The rest of the kids and adults were amusing themselves with an attempted snowman, laughing themselves sick at their attempts with the substandard building material.

“The kids don't certainly seem to mind,” Laura mused.

“They're making the best of it,” argued Carmilla, “but what will they play in once the snow's all gone?”

“Good riddance,” came Mattie's elegant voice from behind them, “it's bad enough that I'm away from my beloved Casablanca during this dreadful season. At least I don't have to deal with that awful, cold, hell powder making every step out there cold and slippery.”

Laura resisted the urge to roll her eyes as she and Carmilla turned to look at her. “And playing the part of Scrooge for this year's Christmas…”

Mattie took a sip of her coffee, smiling with amusement at Laura. Laura wondered, not for the first time, how Mattie managed to make a simple shirt and skirt look both comfortably casual yet ready for the trendiest gala at the same time.

“Nothing could be further from truth, my dear,” said Mattie with a broad smile, “I'm always game for a little holiday cheer, whatever holiday is appropriate to where I'm at. I've enjoyed Hanukkah in Tel Aviv, Yuletide in Glasgow and, of course, Eid al-Adha back in Morocco.”

“Really?” said Laura, “and here I figured your version of the holidays would be going all ‘Twelve Days of Mayhem’.”

“Those years are fun too,” said Mattie to Laura's consternation, “like that one dull year in Cork. Ended up indulging in some lovely St. Stephens day murders.”

“Of course you did,” groaned Laura.

“I'm sure it was many years ago,” reassured Carmilla, “wasn't it, Mattie?”

“Well actually—” Mattie paused as she caught Carmilla's glare, “yes, of course. Years and years ago.”

Laura eyed Mattie suspiciously, but decided not to press the issue, mostly for her own sanity. “Well, regardless, I'm glad you decided to join us this year.”

Carmilla snorted.

“I am!” protested Laura, “our Christmas may be a quieter affair than what you're used to, but I really hope you don't feel like you're missing out by being here.”

“Of course not… Eid is in summer this year,” teased Mattie, chuckling at Laura's pout, “my dear, I think you're a little old for such an expression, even if you  _ look _ just as much the naive cub as the day we met.”

“I suppose you're right,” Laura said with a mischievous smile, “tell me, at what point did your dear sister stop pouting?”

“Hey!” protested Carmilla. Mattie and Laura laughed softly.

“Alright, you have a point,” said Mattie, “and no, I wouldn't be missing out, even if I was missing Eid. Being able to spend a celebration with family is worth it, and I'm not just referring to Carmilla, Gidget.”

Laura smiled, blushing lightly.

“Fantastic occasions with pleasant company are just that. Pleasant, and nothing more,” said Mattie, staring down into her coffee mug as she swirled the contents, “it's nice to be included in something more… substantial.” Mattie got up and walked to the window adjacent Laura and Carmilla's. “And if the temperature is a little warmer, so I can spend the holiday in comfort, so much the better.”

“Well, I'm glad someone thinks so,” said Danny, stepping in from outside, “cause the way things are going out there, that snow's hours, to say nothing of days, are numbered.”

“Are the kids at least having fun?” asked Carmilla.

“Yeah,” said Danny, “I mean, they're a little disappointed —well, except for Trystan. He seems to think his melting snowman reaching out for help is the funniest thing ever— but I think it's hard to not have fun on Christmas Eve when you're that age.”

“I suppose,” said Carmilla, “but when I was that age, every Christmas was covered in snow and I'd play out in it every chance my governess allowed… or that I could sneak away from her.”

“Carm, you grew up in the foothills of the Austrian Alps,” said Laura, petting the back of Carmilla's head, “snow would be a touch more prevalent there than here.”

“A touch,” Carmilla said wryly, “Daddy used to have to hire enormous draft horses every winter. Nothing in our stables was strong enough to pull a sleigh through the drifts.”

“The grandkids will be alright,” said Danny, “they're plenty used to staying amused without the snow. And hey, this way we can go for a run later without out having to break out all the snow booties.”

“I like the snow booties,” said Laura.

“So do I cupcake,” agreed Carmilla, “but Danny's right, they're time consuming to get everyone equipped.” Carmilla was frowning, not quite convinced of what she'd just said.

Danny caught it immediately. “C'mon, why don't we go make them some hot chocolate? Keep the rest of the traditions going.”

Danny and Carmilla both headed for the kitchen. Laura started to go with when she realized Mattie was still at the other window, gazing absently outside.

“You okay?” asked Laura, touching Mattie on the arm.

Mattie seemed to come back to herself, turning to smile at Laura. “Yes, of course darling. Just a bit of wool gathering. Why don't we join Kitty and the pup, another warm drink sounds lovely right about now.”

“O...kay?” said Laura. She followed after the enigmatic Vampire, curious as to what she was up to.

x-x-x

“Alright, and I will buy that line, which completes my route. Seattle to Orlando,” said Marcella, placing the matching card face up.

“This sucks,” said Trystan, “this was my present, how is it I'm getting beaten so badly.”

“Maybe you should just get good,” needled Ash, drawing a haze of ire from his cousin.

“How are you liking the game?” asked Carmilla, looking over the table.

“The game's great,” said Trystan, “but can we trade in this one for store credit?” He jerked a thumb at Ash

Carmilla looked her grandson over. “Nah. It's full refund or nothing, and I just know your aunts lost the receipt.”

“Well dang, I—”

Trystan was cut off by the roar of several large engines starting up somewhere outside.

Raising an eyebrow, Carmilla went out onto the deck to see what was going on, finding Mattie outside directing several people positioning machines.

“MATTIE!” Carmilla yelled over the din.

Mattie winced. “I can hear you just fine.”

Carmilla huffed. “Mattie, what is going on here?”

“Well, I was giving some thought to our conversation yesterday and I must admit, something feels missing with only brown grass out here, so…” Mattie signaled the one who appeared to be the foreperson.

As the workers threw switches, the noise of the machines changed from a chug to resounding whirr. Carmilla watched, fascinated at what these machines may do. She didn't have to wait long to satisfy her curiosity as a white plumes erupted from each of the machines, which began to float back down to settle on the lawn.

Carmilla stepped forward to catch some on her hand, watching as the little ice crystals melted on her palm. “Snow?”

“I pulled a few strings and got some snow machines from a ski hill upstate, to give us a little festive experience for a few hours,” said Mattie.

“But… you hate snow,” said Carmilla.

“Ah, but this is snow that I only have to deal with if I choose to,” said Mattie, “no slushy walks to the car or ruined hairstyles. Now, I suggest you get the kids. This crew can lay down a good layer, but it'll still only last a few hours at this temperature.”

“Mattie…” said Carmilla, “this is amazing. I don't know what to say.”

“‘Thank you’ is customary,” said Mattie, “though ‘Merry Christmas’ will do as well.”

“How 'bout both?” said Carmilla, hugging Mattie, “thank you, and Merry Christmas big sister.”

“Merry Christmas little sister.”

“So what now?” asked Carmilla, “you gonna head back in where it’s warm?”

“I don't think so,” said Mattie, “I paid for this rigmarole, so may as well get my money's worth. But, do hurry up and get the kids. I'll feel rather silly playing around out here by myself.” With that, Mattie shifted and her golden lioness leapt from the deck and into the snow, already the better part of a foot deep.

Carmilla could only laugh as she quickly ran inside to gather the kids for an unexpected bit of winter fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you've all had a wonderful day.
> 
> This one wraps up our Christmas chapters with "White Christmas", suggested by IfCarmillametWillow. I adore Mattie, so I take every opportunity to write her that I can.
> 
> Merry Christmas and have a happy new year!


	82. Grandfather Afield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's always nice when grandpa comes to visit the kids

A small brown pickup pulled into the driveway, the old engine rumbling with age and use. It puttered out gently as the driver cut the ignition and opened the door, bag in hand.

“Gus, I swear one of these days we are gonna get you to replace that old clunker,” said Danny, standing on the front porch with Charlie on her hip.

“I don't know what you're talking about,” said Gus with a laugh, “this old girl is still working just fine. She just has character.”

Danny raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah, sure. I could hear her ‘character’ all the way from when you turned onto the street.” She pointed back to where their cul-de-sac met the main road.

He turned to look as well, squinting at the stop sign in the distance. “Super hearing doesn’t count.”

“Sure it does,” said Laura from the doorway, “I’m the one who could tell it was you at the end of the road. Before that, Danny was wondering if she was hearing Joe snoring from his place across the lake.”

“Sleep apnea,” said Danny with a wink.

“I’m not sure why I’m putting up with this,” said Gus, feigning hurt, “I could just hop back in my truck and leave if that’s what you want.”

“Of course not, Gus. We don’t want you to go anywhere” said Danny, patting him on the shoulder, “Hendrix is having a nap and trying to turn your engine over would probably wake him up.”

Gus’ face scrunched up in a very familiar way. Danny had to fight to keep from laughing.

“I think I made your Dad angry,” she said to Laura.

“Very possibly,” Laura agreed, “fortunately, there is a remedy.”

“Oh?”

Laura gently lifted Charlie from Danny's arms and handed the toddler to her father. He smiled as he put down the bag he was carrying to take his granddaughter, bouncing her playfully. “Hello my sweet girl. Hello there. How are you?”

Charlie simply babbled nonsensical gibberish at him happily.

“Oh is that right?” he cooed, kissing her on the cheek.

She giggled. “G’ampa!”

“That's right! I'm your Grandpa,” he said as he held her up, making silly faces at her.

“You think she could keep him distracted long enough to drive that thing to the scrapyard?” Danny asked with a stage whisper, “grab something new from the dealership, maybe?”

“Nope, not by herself” said Gus, attention still on Charlie, “three might be enough though.” He winked at Danny.

“Challenge accepted!” she declared, “Laura, fetch my good kidnapping bag!”

“Ooh!” squealed Laura, “the one with the bells or the one with the velour drawstrings?”

“Hmmm… choice is nice,” mused Danny, “let’s go for the velour, really treat myself today.”

“On it!” said Laura. She was most of the way to the door when Gus cleared his throat.

“Not quite what I meant,” he said with a chuckle, “I was thinking something a bit more…” He gestured with his free hand. “...homemade.”

“Like, vat grown?” asked Laura, “that’s more Laf’s speed, though they’d probably be willing to help.”

Gus groaned. “Your mommies think they’re comedians, don’t they? But they’re not funny at all, are they? No, they aren’t.” He tickled Charlie’s tummy, making her giggle.

“Honestly Gus, we’re waiting a bit,” said Danny, picking up his bag and jerking her head towards the house, “Carmilla’s pregnancy was really emotionally draining, for all of us, but Carm in particular.”

Gus winced. “Right, yeah. Sorry.”

Danny smiled. “It’s alright. We’re still planning on a third; we just need some time with our happy, healthy children,” Danny said, her smile softening, “we’ll probably start searching for donors in the spring.”

“Well, let me know if you need any help with that,” said Gus.

Danny laughed. “I appreciate the thought, Gus. Really, I do. But unless you’re familiar with some werewolf packs, I think I’ll get Mom and Dad to help me find candidates.”

“That’s fair,” said Gus, “though out of curiosity, does it have to be another werewolf?”

“No, not necessarily. I can think of no few couples that’d be heartbroken if that was the case,” said Danny, “but it makes things a bit more reliable, which I think is something we need this time round.”

“Less chance of…” Gus trailed off.

“Yeah,” said Laura sadly, “not to mention, we’d really like a wolf, have all three kids be like their birthmothers, and it’s a sure thing with both parents.”

“Speaking of, how’s Carmilla doing?” asked Gus, “she always acts happy and strong when I’ve visited over the past few weeks. Is she actually alright?”

“Yes, Dad. She’s actually alright,” said Laura, her mood picking up, “it was a tough road, but Drix is an absolute ray of light for us… even if we don’t really remember what sleep is like anymore.”

“Well, at least you have more reason to  _ actually  _ complain now,” he said wryly, “it was really hard to feel sorry about lack of sleep with three sets of hands helping out with one infant.”

“Heard that before,” said Danny, “Mom actually smacked me when I tried to whine to her.” Danny rubbed the back of her head at the phantom pain from the thought.

“Ha!” laughed Gus, “so where is Carmilla now?”

“She’s outside with Drix,” said Laura, “someone has to stay with him and make sure he doesn’t wander off… again.”

“Wander off?” said Gus, “how’s a two month old wander off? I’ve never heard of a baby crawling before six, usually later.”

“A baby, sure,” said Laura, nodding out into the yard, “a kitten on the other hand...”

On the lawn, Carmilla lay stretched out as in front of her, a black kitten, a bit smaller than a housecat, toddled along on unsure feet.

“Okay, you get a touch more sympathy on the tiredness front for that one,” he said, “you think she’d mind if we went out there.”

“Mind?” said Laura, taking Charlie from Gus’s arms, “I think she’d be hurt if you didn’t go visit.”

Gus smiled and walked out onto the deck. Carmilla saw him and slowly blinked at him, snuffling in welcome as he walked down onto the lawn.

Drix, who’d been staring at his mother, puzzling at the new noise she’d made, turned when he heard the crunch of feet on the lawn. Curious, he began to make his way towards this new person as quickly as he could, which wasn’t very quickly at all as he nearly toppled over with every step.

Gus crouched down. “C’mon Drix. You can make it.”

The cub continued towards him, letting out a strange little cough as he did so. A moment later a second little cough.

“Is he okay? What’s that noise he’s making?” asked Gus.

Carmilla chuffed before opening her mouth and letting out a low groan.

Gus furrowed his brow, trying to discern Carmilla’s meaning.

“He’s just trying to make noises like his mama,” said Danny, “he’s fine.”

Gus picked up Drix as he finally made it over. “Aww, you were just tryin’ to say hi, weren’t you?”

“Careful of his claws,” said Laura, “he's not that much different from an ordinary kitten in that respect. And he's a lot bigger. Sacrificed one of my favourite sweaters to learn that lesson.”

“Is it okay to…?” Gus made a scratching motion with his free hand.

“Absolutely,” said Danny, “he's still a baby. Touch is really important no matter what form he's in.” She took Charlie from Laura, booping her on the nose in demonstration, much to Charlie's amusement.

“And besides, if there's one thing I've learned,” said Laura, walking towards Carmilla, “is that as much as some shifters might complain about being ‘treated like pets’”—she looked emphatically at Danny—”they all love scritches.” She knelt down and began vigourously scratching Carmilla about the head and neck.

Carmilla whuffed happily and rolled further onto her back, eyes closing in contentment.

Gus laughed, gently petting Drix down his head and back. “So I can see.” 

Drix made his cough sound again before yawning, his eyes scrunching shut in contentment. Before long, his body relaxed and his breathing slowed as he drifted off to sleep.

“Oops, I appear to have turned your son off,” said Gus.

Danny leaned in. “Hmm, it appears you're right.”

“D’ix s’eep,” said Charlie before yawning herself.

“Very good, Charlie,” Danny praised.

“Looks like he won't be the only one either,” said Gus.

“Yeah, she was due to drop, but I'm glad she was able to hold out to see her Grandpa,” said Danny before turning to her wives, “guys? We're going to go put the little ones down.”

Laura and Carmilla both perked up and scampered back to the deck, following Gus and Danny inside.

“Aww, he fell asleep?” lamented Carmilla, “but we were having fun.”

“That's how babies work, remember?” said Laura, “they wake up, you stimulate them for a few minutes and then they fall back to sleep.”

“Circle of life,” said Gus.

“You hold my son up and I will maul you,” said Carmilla.

“Not in a Disney mood I take it,” he said.

“It was fine the first half-dozen times,” said Carmilla, glaring at Laura, “but it's worn out its welcome.”

“Aww, sweetie. You killed the joke,” lamented Gus.

“I regret nothing,” said Laura.

Danny rolled her eyes. “C'mon Gus, let's get these two down. Can you guys start on dinner?”

“No need,” said Gus, nodding to the bag he brought, “got my Hollis signature shepard’s pie.”

“Topped with crushed corn flakes?” asked Laura.

“Of course, just the way you like it,” said Gus, “just has to be heated in the oven.”

“On it!” said Laura gleefully.

“I'll go throw together a salad too,” said Carmilla, “make sure you all don't drop off scurvy.”

“Good idea,” said Danny as she and Gus headed for the stairs, “so Gus, about that truck…”

Gus groaned as the took the kids up the stairs for a nap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a bit of fluff. I came across a video of a lion cub trying to roar (right [here](http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/169100800353/babyanimalgifs-lion-cub-napoleon-shows-off-his) in a totally not self promoty place *whistles innocently*) which I wanted to use for Drix. Took the video, added wads of fluff and voila!
> 
> Hope you all liked it!


	83. Warming Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dark days and dark moods can often be chased away by a sweet treat.

“Cocoa powder, one tablespoon. Brown sugar, one tablespoon. Dark chocolate shavings, two ounces. Whole milk, one cup. The perfect mug of hot chocolate, priceless.”

Laura whisked the contents of the small saucepan in front of her. The aroma was incredible; it took more willpower than she was willing to admit to not try and dunk her face into the scalding brew now and deal with the burns later.

The window rattled as a buffet of wind blew across it; a staccato of rain splattering across the pane. Laura looked out at the miserable rain storm, glad that she was inside. It wasn't cold enough to snow out, but the driving damp brought a chill nonetheless, making this a perfect day for Laura's favourite recipe.

She dipped the whisk in and out of the pot, carefully watching the consistency, trying to make sure she had gotten it just right. Biting her lip as she deliberated, Laura finally gave the concoction a firm nod and poured it out into a mug that she had prepared earlier.

Laura swept up the dribble of chocolate from the pan’s edge with a finger, swooning a little as she licked it off and got a little preview of the drink to come. Placing the pan in the sink, she reached into the fridge and grabbed the whipped cream, adding a dollop as the final flourish.

She licked her lips in anticipation, taking the steaming mug to the living room where she had popcorn, a blanket and a generous helping of the thirteenth Doctor ready to go. She hit play and was just putting the steaming mug to her lips when the mudroom door opened unexpectedly.

Caught halfway between annoyance and concern, Laura put the mug back on the coffee table and went back into the kitchen to investigate, finding Drix leaning over the island with a pensive expression, bookbag still slung over his back.

“Drix?”

He started, snapping out his rumination. “Oh, hi Mom.”

“What's wrong, bud?” Laura asked, giving him a comforting rub on the back.

“Hmm… oh, nothing,” he said quietly.

“Doesn't seem like nothing,” said Laura, “you came home in the middle of the day and you look so wilted, I feel like I need to water you and stick you in a sunny window. Now what's wrong? Oh dear… you and Aaron didn't break up did you?”

“What? No, nothing like that,” exclaimed Drix, looking at Laura completely askance, “Aaron and I are great. What made you think that?”

“Well, you usually either go over to his place or have him here hanging off of your arm… or attached to your neck if you think we aren’t watching,” she added slyly.

“Mom…” Drix blushed. “He’s still in class, he’ll be coming over later. I just needed to decompress.”

Laura remained silent, opting to just rub his arm while he processed.

“I bombed that test,” he said.

“The one your Mama was helping you study for?” asked Laura, “your Philosophy elective?”

“Yeah. It was covering everything up to Mill.”

Laura stared at Drix without comprehension.

“Y’know? Utilitarianism?” he supplied, “the idea that society should collectively pursue happiness over contentment alone?”.

“Sorry Drix,” said Laura, “I only took Philosophy for one semester. It was all I could stand, despite your Mama’s assistance, though I might have stuck with it with a topic like that. The Silas course seemed to revel in the depressing ones. 

“You sounded pretty confident about what you were talking about, though,” she observed, “I’ll bet you did better on that test than you think.”

“Maybe,” said Drix unconvincingly, “the ‘what’ of the matter is easy. Remember and regurgitate. The essay question on the other hand…”

“Ah yes, the old abstract argument with no right or wrong answer,” said Laura.

“That’s the one,” said Drix, “I just talked in circles without making a point. I barely even finished before time was up.” He sighed, finally taking his bag off and placing it on the counter.

“I’m sure you did just fine,” said Laura, giving him a side hug. Drix’s expression did not change.

Thinking for a moment, Laura took Drix’s arm. “C’mon.”

Drix looked at her incredulously, but allowed himself to be led to the living room.

“Sit,” commanded Laura.

Drix did as he was told, plopping himself down onto the couch.

Laura gave a satisfied nod before grabbing her blanket and placing it over his legs. Finally, she grabbed her mug and thrust it into his hands.

“Mom,” he said, “I can’t take your hot chocolate.”

“What? You’re afraid you’re gonna catch cooties from your Mom?” She ruffled his hair and teasingly kissed him on the cheek. Despite his best efforts, a smile started to work it’s way onto his face.

“No, but I can tell you made this for yourself and were about to enjoy an afternoon of… Tennant?”

“Whittaker.”

“Whittaker, before I bumbled in. I should let you enjoy it.” He tried to get up but was gently pushed back down.

“You hardly bumbled in and you needed this more than I did, I think.” She smiled as he finally brought the mug to his lips. Satisfied he wasn’t going to move, she spun on her toe and jogged towards the kitchen. “And besides, you really think I don’t have enough ingredients to make a few gallons of that stuff?”

She heard Drix chuckle behind her. “Fine, twist my arm why don’t you. Did you have any particular episode in mind?”

“No,” she said, melting a new batch of chocolate in the pan, “the disc is already in, just hit play.”

“I can wait,” he replied contentedly; with none of the melancholy of a few minutes ago, Laura noted happily.

She started to stir in the milk when she heard a rapping coming from the doorwall followed by the door opening.

“Hi Auntie Laura,” said Hazel, looking half-drowned.

“Hazel!” exclaimed Laura, removing the pot from the heat, “come in, come in. What are you doing out in this mess?”

There was another splatter of rain against the window pane, as if the storm took offense to Laura’s quip.

“My building at school lost power so I hopped the bus home, but I forgot my keys. Mom’s at work and Laf’s not home right now,” said Hazel as she shut the door behind her.

“Well that’s rotten luck, but you’re welcome here,” said Laura, helping Hazel out of her sodden jacket, “though I suppose that goes without saying.”

“Still nice to hear,” said Hazel, “warm fuzzies and all.”

Laura laughed. “Go upstairs and help yourself to something of Charlie’s to wear before you freeze.”

“Thanks,” said Hazel, scampering up the stairs.

Laura smiled before going into the cupboards and pulling out all the ingredients again, tossing another mug’s worth into the pan and putting it back on the heat.

“It smells amazing down here,” said Hazel, comfily outfitted in one of Charlie’s sweatshirts.

“Have you never had Mom’s homemade hot chocolate before?” asked Drix, wandering over with his own half-empty mug.

“I don’t think so,” said Hazel, searching her memory.

“Boy, you are in for a treat,” said Drix, “also, Charlie is gonna pounce you if she sees you in her shirt.”

“I know.” Hazel waggled her eyebrows. Drix rolled his eyes with a smile.

“Mother in the room here,” said Laura, holding up a finger.

Drix stared at her deadpan. “You let Mom nibble your ear last night at the  _ dinner table. _ I think that bit of high ground has been steamrolled.”

Laura paused, her finger drooping. ”Ah... right.”

“Well, regardless, it’s not like we’re going to— nope, not actually gonna say it. Still just a bit too weird,” said Hazel.

“Agreed,” said Laura with a chuckle as she filled up two mugs, “let’s talk about something else.”

“Alright. Drix, how’re your classes going?”

The wind dropped right out of Drix’s sails at the topic.

“Ooh.” Laura winced. “Something else, other than that.”

“Wait, what?” asked Hazel, “did I say something wrong?”

Drix smiled softly and patted her shoulder. “No Haze, I just didn’t have a good exam today in Philosophy, so I’m a bit bummed out.”

“Ouch, I’ve been there,” she said, “what was it worth?”

“Fifteen percent… I think.”

Hazel nodded sagely. “Well, that’s not too bad. Even if you did absolutely bomb it, you can bounce back and still nail the course. What’s the biggest grade portion? The final?”

“No, a term paper,” he said, a smile reappearing.

“A planned out term paper, for a journalism student with a journalist, lit prof and philosophy major for parents.” Hazel counted off on her fingers. “You’re gonna be just fine.”

“You’re right,” agreed Drix, “thanks Hazel. When did you get so smart.”

“Round about the time I was born.” Hazel winked at him.

“Says the girl who forgot her keys,” said Laura, handing Hazel a mug complete with whipped cream.

“Hey, I said I was smart, not meticulous. Gotta talk to Mom for that one,” joked Hazel.

“Will do,” said Laura, “but enough chit-chat. We’ve got an afternoon off and we’re not doing nearly enough lazing about.”

“I grabbed some extra blankets, so we’ll be nice and warm,” said Drix, “so all we need is our entertainment.”

“To the couches!” said Laura, leading the way to an afternoon with a friendly blue box.


	84. Dance Dance Machination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Parents need to get properly involved with their kids education.

“Mama, can I get a ride to school?”

Mercy came scrambling up to the kitchen table where Carmilla was mid-sip of her coffee. She was bouncing fretfully on the balls of her feet.

Carmilla glanced at the clock on the wall. “Are you not going with Sky and Laf this morning?”

“Sky had an early morning rehearsal for the recital this weekend, so they’re going straight from there. I forgot completely until I’d been waiting outside for ten minutes.” Mercy looked at the clock on the wall nervously; she only had about fifteen more minutes before the bell.

Carmilla looked at Mercy with a tight lipped smile before knocking back the rest of her coffee and heading towards the garage. “C’mon kiddo, let’s get you there. I really don’t want to deal with Elsie’s snark if you’re late.”

They got in the car and with Carmilla’s usual rev of the engine, they pulled out of the garage and onto the street.

“Eh, she’s never all that snarky at school,” said Mercy.

“Well of course she isn’t,” said Carmilla, “she likes you kids so she’s nice to you and for anyone she doesn’t like, she gets to be ‘Principal Maximoff’ the iron fisted ruler of all she sees. That beats snark hands down.”

“You sound jealous,” teased Mercy.

“Y’know, I kinda am…” said Carmilla, “until I remember just how much red tape she has to deal with day in and day out. Not to mention all the snot-nosed brats.”

“Hey!” protested Mercy, “I am not snot nosed and am very rarely a brat… anymore.”

“Debatable,” Carmilla said, nudging Mercy playfully.

Mercy pouted. “I should have walked.”

“Too late now, cause here’s your school.” Carmilla pulled up to the curb, undoing her seatbelt.

“Mama, you don’t have to get out,” said Mercy.

“Nonsense. You know the rule.”

“You get a ride, you get the full treatment,” said Mercy with mock resignation.

Carmilla walked around to the curb and pulled Mercy into a hug. “Have a good day at school kiddo.” She kissed her daughter on the forehead.

“Thanks for the ride, Mama.”

“Laaaafff” came a familiar whine.

Carmilla and Mercy turned to see Lafontaine peppering Sky’s cringing face with kisses.

“Do they always do that?” Carmilla whispered to Mercy.

“Only when Sky says ‘you could never embarrass me’ or something to that effect,” said Mercy.

_ Bong Bong Bong _

The artificial tone of the bell echoed from PA speakers on the outside of the building.

“Whoop, I’ve gotta get going if I’m going to make it to class on time,” said Mercy, scampering off, “Bye Mama! Love you!”

“Have a good day!”

“Hi Auntie Carm! Bye Auntie Carm!” said Sky as she ran past, catching up to Mercy.

“They grow up so fast,” said Laf as they walked up beside Carmilla.

“Too fast,” she grumbled, “they are so not allowed to be the last kids we have in high school.”

“What? You guys planning on more?” asked Laf.

“Well, no,” said Carmilla, “but there is a certain appeal to it…” She trailed off wistfully.

“Certainly is,” agreed Laf, “though most would argue that’s what grandchildren are for.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Very good point. You think it’s too early to start dropping subtle hints?

“Let me put it this way,” said Laf, “Perry has already started leaving bridal magazines around the house with the excuse that she’s looking at the cakes.”

Carmilla bit back a laugh, already plotting excuses for her own not so subtle nudges.

“Hey you two.”

“Oh, hi Elsie,” said Laf, turning to greet the newcomer.

Carmilla simply waved.

“Do you guys have a minute?” Elsie asked.

“Uh, sure,” said Carmilla, “what’s up?”

“I need to talk to you both… in my office,” Elsie said calmly.

Carmilla and Laf shared a look of concern.

“Yeah, sure,” said Laf, “lead the way.”

Elsie smiled softly before turning and walking back towards the front door. Carmilla leaned in towards Laf as they followed after. “Is it weird that I feel anxious about going to the principal’s office, even though I never attended high school as a kid?”

“Normally, I’d say yes… but in Elsie’s case…” Laf shivered involuntarily.

“Oh come on, I’m not that bad,” protested Elsie, to their surprise, “what? You get good at hearing overhearing whispers when you teach. You know how many tacks on chairs I’ve avoided that way?”

“Duly noted,” said Carmilla wryly, “and yes Blondie, you are that bad, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.” Carmilla smirked as a couple of dawdling students fled out of their path and around a corner as they approached.

“Well, I can’t claim that that never gets old,” admitted Elsie, “makes you feel powerful. And completely guilt free to boot, cause it’s all for their own good in the end.”

“You sound like a mad scientist justifying their work,” said Carmilla.

“Yeah, you— heeeeeey!” said Laf, grinning broadly.

The three shared a chuckle as Elsie brought them into her office and shut the door behind them.

“So now that we have some privacy, what’s up?” asked Carmilla, “are Sky and Mercy in trouble?”

“What? Oh, no. Though I can see how you might think that,” said Elsie, taking a seat. She leaned back, kicking her feet up onto her desk, “no, the girls are a pleasure to have, as always. Certainly a sight easier than certain punch happy siblings I could name.”

“Like you weren’t absolutely pleased everytime they lodged some bully into a wall,” said Carmilla.

“Exactly. Do you know how hard it is to stay professional when all you wanna do is say ‘hit ‘em with the chair!’?” said Elsie, “but anyways, I, or rather we, need some parent volunteers for the upcoming dance.”

“So you just lurk around before school hoping to catch unsuspecting parents who were dumb enough to get out of their cars?” asked Laf.

“Yup. The ones who go that extra step are so much easier to guilt into helping out,” said Elsie with a grin.

Carmilla hung her head back with a groan. “I coulda been an ordinary disaffected vampire for the rest of time. But no, I just had to go and meet the loves of my life, get married and have kids who I would do anything for.”

“Oh you poor, burdened, avatar of the night,” teased Laf, “what do you need help with? Setting up? Chaperones? Selling snacks?”

“All of the above, I’m afraid,” said Elsie, “it’s been slim pickings lately.”

“Some parents getting wise to you?” asked Laf.

“Yeah, I need to invest in a ghillie suit or something,” lamented Elsie.

“Ugh, fine,” said Carmilla, “when is the dance?”.

“A week tomorrow at eight” said Elsie, “we’d need you here about six.”

“Alright, the three of us will be here,” said Carmilla.

“You’re gonna rope Laura and Danny into it?” asked Laf.

“Elsie said they were short on help, we should provide as much as we can,” said Carmilla, “and this way I won’t suffer alone.”

Laf rolled their eyes. “I’m in too, and I’ll  _ ask _ Perry if she wants to help. I think she’ll be interested, so you can probably count her in.”

“Excellent,” said Elsie, “we’ll see you next friday.”

“Yay,” deadpanned Carmilla.

x-x-x

“Oh my goodness, Mercy!” squealed Laura, “you look great!”

Mercy spun around in the simple blue dress she’d picked as she stepped off the stairs.

“You looks fantastic, love,” said Sky, stepping up in the flowing light blue top and black slacks she’d chosen.

“You too, babe,” said Mercy, touching foreheads with Sky.

The flash of a camera broke them out of their reverie. “Sorry, kiddos,” said Laura, “but we gotta get going so I wanted to snap at least a couple pics.”

“This is hardly prom, Mom,” said Mercy, “or even one of the good dances. The student council just schedules these cause they’re bored.”

“I know,” said Laura, “but you look pretty and it’s still a nice memory.” She snapped another picture.

Mercy smiled. “Thanks Mom.”

“Charlie’s giving you a ride over?” asked Carmilla.

“Yep, we should be there just after things get started,” said Sky.

“You worried having all your parents around is gonna cramp your style?” joked Laura.

“Nah, you guys are easy,” Sky replied, stepping into Mercy in demonstration, “other parents are trickier, you never know quite what you’re gonna have to deal with.” Sky half frowned.

Carmilla turned to Laura. “Why haven’t we considered that and done this before?”

“Cause me and Danny never did the high school dance thing when we were kids and you never went to high school at all. It just never occurred to us,” said Laura.

“Well, I’ll be volunteering for a whole bunch more now,” said Carmilla, “damned if I’m gonna let some ass-backwards numbskull get between my daughter and her girlfriend.”

“Thanks Mama,” said Mercy, giving Carmilla a hug.

“Anything for you, love.” Carmilla squeezed Mercy tight.

“Come on guys,” said Danny, “Laf and Perr just pulled up, we need to get going.”

“Alright, we’re coming,” said Laura, “see you later guys!”

“Bye Moms,” Mercy called after them as they walked out the front door.

They piled into back seat of Laf’s waiting car and they started off towards the school.

“So do we have any idea of what we’re actually going to be up to?” asked Carmilla.

“Aside from Perr, who’s taken charge of the concession, not really,” said Laf, “I assume we’ll just pick up what we need to for prep and then stand around the dance to keep an eye on things.”

“Sounds good, we’ll just hang a few streamers, stand around making sure no one fights and we can head home and celebrate with a beer,” said Danny, “seems simple enough.”

“Oh, on that note,” said Perry, “Elsie told me we’re invited over to her and hunter’s place tomorrow as a thank you.”

“That’s nice of them,” said Laura, “perk of knowing the principal I guess.”

“Not a bad perk, I’d say,” agreed Carmilla.

A few minutes later, they were parked and headed for the gym where the dance was being held. At the door, they found Elsie directing traffic, clipboard in hand.

“Oh good, you’re here,” said Elsie, “Perry the concession is just off of the lobby from the school side. One of your crew is already there, the other two should be here shortly.”

“That’s wonderful. I’ll get them to help me bring in the things from the car,” said Perry.

“Wait, you made stuff, Perr?” asked Carmilla.

“Of course. The concession is there to fundraise,” said Perry, “and I think my wares will do a bit better than dry and chewy grocery store donuts.”

“I dunno, you’d sell more water with dry baked goods,” mused Carmilla.

“The water is free,” said Elsie, “keeps the kids hydrated.”

“The misanthrope in me wants to be annoyed by that, but as a Mom I can’t be, dammit,” said Carmilla.

“Yeah,” said Elsie, clapping Carmilla on the shoulder, “those maternal instincts get in the way of a good exploitation scheme.”

“Exactly, this is why you get me,” said Carmilla, looking at Elsie’s list, “it looks like you managed to find some more help. Ghillie suit paid off, huh?”

“Uh, yeah,” said Elsie, with a cough “managed a few more volunteers over the week. A few ambushes, a little blackmail, y’know the usual business.”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow before turning to Elsie. “Huh, nice work. Alright, where in the dance mines shall your minions go to work?”

Elsie chuckled. “Alright, can you and Danny hang the mini-lights? The reel and ladders are just in the middle of the floor there. There are some anchor points up on the walls so it should zig-zag across the gym pretty easily.”

“On it,” said Danny. 

“Laura, Laf, can you two go help hook up the sound system?” Elsie pointed towards the stage. “One of the A/V kids is DJing, but could use more hands getting everything set up.”

“How much tinkering am I allowed?” asked Laf gleefully.

“Well, it’s school equipment, so you can’t do anything that’ll blow it up,” said Elsie, “but it also needs all the help it can get, so have at it!”

“Sweet!” said Laf, “c’mon Frosh!”

“Laf, if I get electrocuted…” said Laura as she trailed after them.

“Well, c’mon Red,” said Carmilla, lifting the ladders in each hand, “let’s put that Tall of yours to good use.”

Danny chuckled as she hefted the reel of lights and followed after.

x-x-x

Carmilla stood at the edge of the dance, wincing with every beat of the repetitive dance mix. Laf wandered up to her, nudging her with their shoulder.

“Having fun?” they yelled over the din.

“I’m seriously debating my earlier declaration of future volunteering,” replied Carmilla.

“Eh, this isn’t so bad,” said Laf.

“They said with their regular human ears,” grumbled Carmilla.

“Well, fair point,” agreed Laf, “but at least we can make sure our daughters have a good time.” They nodded over to where Sky and Mercy were dancing pressed right up against each other, completely lost in each other’s eyes.”

“That’s been fun at least,” said Carmilla as she glared at another parent who’d been heading towards the dancing pair, cowing them into retreat. She grinned wickedly.

Laf chuckled as the song came to an end. “Good work. Well, try and keep yourself amused and then we can—”

“Good evening!” came an announcement from the stage, in a very familiar voice, “is everybody having fun?”

Everyone in the gym cheered.

“That’s great!” On stage, Charlie stepped out onto the stage in a shiny red sequined jacket and slacks, talking into a microphone. “Well, if you’ll bear with us for just a moment, we’ve got a treat for you.”

“Uh oh,” said Laf.

Behind her, Aaron wheeled out a small cart with something under a black cloth.

“Double uh oh,” agreed Carmilla.

“At the big dances, we all love seeing the crowning of our beloved monarchs. The Prom King, The Ice Queen, The Fall Maiden, but what about the little dances? Why don’t we have anything for the early april, ‘boy, we’re all bored so might as well’ dance? Well I, Charlie Hollis, your beloved alumnus has come up with the perfect solution. I present to you, the April Fools!”

Aaron pulled the cloth back revealing a jester’s cap and an umbrella hat. The crowd laughed and whistled in approval.

“But upon who should such an honour be bestowed. A student? No, none of you knew so we couldn’t have a vote. That wouldn’t be fair at all. A teacher? No, that would be favouritism.”

“You’ve graduated!” jeered Elsie.

“Yep, awful, awful, favouritism,” continued Charlie, ignoring her former principal, “well, if we can’t give it to a student or teacher, who does that leave? Why, our wonderful parent volunteers who put this all together for us. Let’s give em a hand!”

Enthusiastic whoops and applause rose from the audience.

“So, without further ado, I’ll get my lovely assistant to bring me the names of parent volunteers and we’ll draw to see who our winners are,” said Charlie as Aaron brought a bowl of papers up. With a flourish and a grin like a 70s game show host, she withdrew two slips from the bowl, looking at them with pantomimed surprise. “Well, I’ll be, I never would have guessed. The two winners are… Carmilla Karnstein and LaFontaine!”

Cheesy awards show music started over the loudspeakers as a spotlight that they hadn’t noticed before shone right on them, much to their horror.

“Come on up you two.” Charlie gestured for them to come up on stage.

Sharing looks of exasperation, they trudged up onto the stage in the full glare of the spotlight. Upon arriving on the stage, the jester’s cap was placed on Carmilla’s head and the umbrella hat, Lafontaine’s. They were each also handed a bouquet of rubber chickens, which squeaked and honked with every motion.

“Your April Fools everybody!” said Charlie, the crowd exploding in cheers, “did you have anything you’d like to say?” She held out the microphone to them.

“Yes,” said Lafontaine, “I’d like to thank the academy. Opportunities like this only come up once in a while and I’d like to say this is such an honour.” They handed Carmilla the microphone.

“I agree, such an honour,” said Carmilla, “and in honour of the award presenter I’ll be posting all her embarrassing baby pictures at heycarmilla dot tum—”

“Okay!” said Charlie, pulling back the microphone. Now, I’d like to call on our winners to lead us in what, I’m sure will be the traditional first act of the April Fools for years to come… The Chicken Dance!”

Over the speakers, the familiar polka song started up, prompting looks of horror between Laf and Carmilla.

“Well, they kissed for ours, may as well take our lumps,” said Laf, starting to flap their arms.

“Agreed,” said Carmilla, half-heartedly mimicking Lafontaine, leading a delighted gym of teenagers though the silly song.

x-x-x

“So then what happened?” asked Hunter shaking with laughter as he flipped a burger on the grill.

“They restarted the oontz-oontz-oontz music and we left the stage,” said Laf, taking a swig of beer.

“Any reason you’re still wearing the…” he pointed to the umbrella hat.”

“Hey, I earned this. No one’s taking it away from me,” they said.

“Uh-huh, and what about her?” he asked, nodding to Carmilla, the jester’s bells on her cap jingling with every step.

“Guilt trip,” said Laf with a grin.

“Of course,” he said, “y’know I think I’m the only person they didn’t ask for help. I kinda feel left out.”

“Really? Well, if we think of something next time, then we’ll totally give you a call,” they said holding out their beer bottle.

“Sounds great,” he said, clinking his to theirs. He closed the lid to let the burgers cook as they wandered back to the group.

“So any plans for that flashy suit?” asked Carmilla, “I mean, I have to admit, it looked good. Tacky, obviously, but good.”

“It should,” said Charlie, “I put way too many hours in, sewing those things on.”

“What about this?” asked Danny, flicking one of Carmilla’s bells.

“Nah, that was easy enough to find,” said Charlie, “same thrift-store I found the burgundy suit in.”

“So how’d you convince Elsie to let you disrupt one of her dances?” asked Laura.

“Let?” laughed Elsie, “they barely mentioned it and I was all in. Hell, I wanted to slime you guys just to say that I could. Think of the power I’d have, I’d just need a big yellow button on my desk after that.”

“So you can see why we didn’t go with Mom’s plan,” joked Aaron.

“Thank you for that,” said Carmilla, “that would have been… unpleasant.”

“Says you,” said Laf, “I woulda been fine.” They pointed to the umbrella hat.

Carmilla chuckled. “Well, a very good play. You’ve only missed one step.”

“We have?” asked Charlie, looking back at her Mama in confusion.

Carmilla glanced emphatically at her.

“Oh right!” she said before whispering something to Aaron, whose eyes widened in realization.

“Oh yeah,” he said, “should… no, you should do it. You’ve been our announcer on this one.”

“Alright,” said Charlie before turning to Carmilla and Laf, “your move.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prank War, Chapter 4. I always like doing these ones, even if thinking up suitable pranks that won't hurt anyone's feelings are difficult. (cause 'ha ha, now you're scarred' takes it a bit beyond a prank in my humble opinion). I hope you all liked it and if anyone has any ideas they'd like to see for pranks (or prompts in general) feel free to drop em in, I love getting them.
> 
> Have a good week all!


	85. Behind Closed What Now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A healthy sex life can have it's hazards

Danny doubled over, clutching at her stomach with both hands. It had been a very long time since she had hurt like this.

“Ahahahahahaha!”

“I'm so glad I could count on you for a sympathetic ear,” grumbled Perry as she blushed intensely, “seriously, why are you laughing? You three have been caught more times than I can even imagine.”

“C'mon Perr, you know us. When we get in the mood, the three of us combined have less good sense than a golfer in a thunderstorm,” said Danny through her giggles, “but this is _you_ we're talking about. I never dreamed that it'd happen to you. I always kinda figured if you did something like this, you’d have a backup plan or lay traps or something”

“I know!” Perry dropped her head into her hands. “It's so embarrassing.”

“No, no, Perr. It's great,” said Danny, receiving an incredulous look from Perry, “you keep yourself pretty high strung. You took a risk and cut loose. I'm proud of you.”

“I just can't forget the look on that poor salesperson's face,” moaned Perry, “I'm never going to be able to show my face in Banana Republic ever again. Or the mall! Oh my goodness, people are going to talk!”

“Perry, people aren’t going to talk,” said Danny, “it’s not like you got caught in the bathroom at the diner... or in the middle of the lake... or in the dressing room of Ms. Kerr’s vintage shop.”

“She still won’t let all three of you in at once, will she?” asked Perry.

“Nnnope,” said Danny with a smirk, “but that’s my point. You were at a mall in the city, I doubt they would even remember you. You were probably just ‘couple in dressing rooms: number 31,496’.”

“Well, I’d like to think we were a little more memorable than that…” Perry said quietly.

Danny’s smile became playful. “What was that? Was that a hint of, dare I say it, pride?”

“Well…” Perry fought, unsuccessfully, to keep a smirk off of her face. “The _reason_ we were caught was that Lafontaine may have gotten a bit… loud.”

“You got caught?!” came Laura excited exclamation from the kitchen.

Perry groaned and nestled her face back into her hands.

“When? Where? How?” Laura rapid fired as she ran into the living room, dropping onto the couch beside Perry.

“Ms. Perry, in the dressing room, with the scientist,” supplied Danny.

“Ms. Kerr's?”

Danny chuckled. “No, not quite so close to home.”

“Do you two have to discuss this while I'm here?”

“You'd rather we talked behind your back?” asked Laura.

“I'd rather you not talk about it at all,” said Perry, “but I get your point.”

“It’s fine, Perr. It happens to everybody,” said Laura.

Danny coughed. “Well, actually…”

“Please, Danny. Just leave me to my delusions,” said Laura, “it’s a wonder Dad hasn’t caught wind of—”

Perry’s cell phone started ringing, filling the room with the sound of thumping bass. She picked it up, looking at the call ID. “Huh, it’s Carmilla,” she said, glancing at Laura and Danny before answering to speaker, “hello?”

_“Hahahahahahaha—”_

Perry immediately hung up, her face tight with annoyance. Taking a deep breath, she schooled her expression to something more neutral and calmly placed the phone back down on the table.

“So, I think the best thing is to simply put this whole thing behi—

The phone started ringing again. It skittered across the table with every vibration. Perry eyed it suspiciously, raising and lowering her hand indecisively. After a couple of rings, Laura picked up the phone and answered it. “Perry’s phone.”

_“Hi Cupcake, is Perry there? I need to tell her something.”_

“You’re on speaker. She can hear you,” said Danny.

_“Oh good. Perry?”_ said Carmilla

“Yes?” Perry responded cautiously.

There was a pause.

_“Niiiiiiice!”_

“Carm, be nice,” scolded Laura.

_“I am being nice,”_ said Carmilla, _“I’m impressed. Managed to terrify a bystander and get laid in one fell swoop.”_

“Carmilla!” scolded Danny.

“Okay, seriously, how on earth did you know?” asked Perry.

_“Let’s just say a little bird told me… a little, red-headed bird,”_ said Carmilla.

_“Uh, hi guys.”_

“Hi Lafontaine,” said Perry.

Laura and Danny looked at Perry expectantly, waiting for the hammer to fall.

“What?” she asked, “it happened to them too. They’re allowed to get it off their chest.”

“ _More like you got it off of—”_

“Finish that sentence Carm and you won’t be getting anything off of anything anytime soon,” said Laura.

_“I’ll be good.”_

“Good,” said Danny, “where are you two?”

_“_ Just coming in the back door,” said Lafontaine as they came in from the deck. Carmilla came in just behind them, hanging up the phone and putting it down on the table, “we were out for a walk after having coffee.”

“Ooh, coffee!” exclaimed Carmilla, “that reminds me of this one time—”

“A-hem!” said Laura, “I appreciate wanting to share stories so they don’t feel quite as mortified, but maybe we can keep a few of our escapades under wraps... maybe?”

“Whatever happened to that Laura who wanted to share everything for posterity?” teased Carmilla.

“She’s still here,” protested Laura, “I just always turned the camera off when things got… private.”

“Well, except for that one time,” whispered Carmilla to Danny.

“Mmm… we should pull that one out tonight,” Danny whispered back.

“I like the way you think,” replied Carmilla, bumping shoulders with Danny.

“Hey, what are you two whispering about over there?” asked Laf.

“Nothing,” they said in concert.

Laf glanced over at Laura who’d turned beet red, despite not being remotely in earshot of the exchange. “Uh-huh. I think the part I’m the most choked about is the fact that I’d actually found a couple of nice shirts, and they wouldn’t let me buy them. Just ‘please leave, do not pass Go, do not collect $200’.”

“We literally get caught with our pants down and you’re worried about shirts?” asked Perry wryly.

“Well, to be fair, only I got caught with my pants down,” they said with a chuckle, “I hadn’t had a chance to reciprocate.” They wiggled their eyebrows at her.

Perry rolled her eyes and smiled, blushing lightly.

“But these guys are right, it’s not a big deal. We really didn’t get into that much trouble, and once the embarrassment fades, this is gonna be a hilarious story.” They mimed a pen and paper. “‘Dear Penthouse. I never thought it would happen to me…’.”

Perry smacked their knee playfully. “Alright now, Firstly, yes, you’re right. It is kind of funny, especially after getting some perspective.” She glanced knowingly at the trio. “And secondly, it was hardly Penthouse worthy… now if the saleswoman had joined us maybe.”

Laf’s eyes bugged out. “Wha? Huh? Whuh? Who? Guh…”

Carmilla burst out laughing. “And Curly Sue makes a comeback. Nicely done, I didn’t think you had it in you.”

Perry smirked. “Well, one doesn’t spend as much time with you as we do without picking up a little bit of sass.”

“It’s a grand legacy and I’m proud to see others lift its banner,” said Carmilla, pretending to wipe a tear away.

“Because a legacy of three kids and eight grandkids wasn’t enough,” joked Danny.

“Exactly!” declared Laura, “it’ll be a grand-cult of personality spanning the globe! Or y’know, to the next county, either works.”

“Well, count us in,” said Laf, getting up, “but, I think it’s time we were going. Mercy and Sky are bringing the kids over for dinner so we should get things started.”

“Oh, you’re right,” agreed Perry, “I still need to put together a plum cake for dessert.”

“Alright, you two,” said Danny, following them to the door, “you guys gonna be okay?”

“I think so,” said Perry, “all we needed was a little perspective.”

“Glad to hear it,” said Danny, “well, you two take care. We’ll see you later.”

“See ya guys!” said Laf.

Perry waved as Danny closed the door behind them and they began making their way back to their own house.

“Have you ever been to Ms. Kerr's vintage shop?” asked Perry, wrapping an arm around Laf, “I hear it's lovely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided I needed to be silly again this week (what's new, huh?). Hope you all enjoyed it!


	86. Really. It Happened.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Perry rushes to help her friends in crisis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The events of "Really? We did it? 2" from You Do for Family from Perry and Laf's perspective.
> 
> Warning: mentions of miscarriage

Perry’s phone rang.

Perry looked up from the sudoku in her lap. It was nearly eleven at night and her phone was ringing. A chill set into Perry’s gut as she levered herself out of bed and hurried over to where she’d left it charging on the dresser. Laura’s name on the display made her stomach tighten even further.

“Laura, sweetie. What is it?” she asked immediately upon picking up.

_“Perry,”_ said Laura, her voice audibly shaking, even over the line, _“we need you to come watch Charlie.”_

Perry was already running towards the door as fast as she could. “I’ll be right there.”

The line went dead. Perry didn’t pay it much heed; Laura had more important things to worry about than manners.

“Perr?” Laf asked as Perry was hurriedly tying her shoelaces.

“Carmilla,” was all that Perry said before throwing the door open and running out into the night.

“I’ll grab some of your things and I’ll be right behind you!” called Laf.

Not for the first time, and she doubted for the last, she silently thanked whatever forces had brought them into her life as she ran as fast as she could down the street to where her friends were waiting for her.

Reaching their front yard, she pelted straight across the lawn to the front door, throwing it open and running in. “Laura?” Perry yelled as loud as she could as she tried to catch her breath. She quickly made her way upstairs, meeting the girls as they came down.

Perry’s gaze fell upon Carmilla, unconscious in Danny’s arms. The idea that Carmilla was dead had always been a technicality to Perry; a statement carrying a rather important ‘but’. However, in that moment, with a pallor so pale that a hint of blue played at her lips, death’s grip on Carmilla was all too apparent.

“Oh god…” she said, frozen in surprise before snapping back to herself and pressing up against the wall of the stairs, “go, go!”

She followed them out, watching as they peeled away with a screech of tires. Wiping away tears, she quietly closed the door and went upstairs to check on Charlie.

In her crib, Charlie was mewling fretfully. As Perry looked over the edge, the infant calmed down, but was still visibly upset.

“Oh, my poor little dear,” cooed Perry sadly, scooping Charlie up into her arms, “you have no idea what’s going on, do you?” She bounced softly, trying to sooth the baby to sleep. “Your mommies are really scared and you have no idea why, you can just tell something’s wrong, can’t you?”

Charlie squirmed with a soft whine, eyelids drooping but she was obviously fighting it. From downstairs, she heard the front door open and shut.

“Perr?” called Lafontaine.

“Upstairs,” she replied. She paced the room, cooing nonsense at Charlie as she began to slip off.

“What was it?” asked Lafontaine as they came into the nursery.

“I… I don’t know,” said Perry. The image of Carmilla’s limp form, looking so fragile in Danny’s arms, came back into the forefront of her mind. A wave of fear brought new tears to her eyes. She bit back a sob as they began to roll down her face.

Lafontaine walked over and pulled Perry into a side hug, resting their spare hand on the arm cradling Charlie. “It’ll be alright. Carmilla’s tough. This is the same girl that bounced back from falling down a pit and laying there lifeless for a week. And she’s got Dr. Antos, she’ll be just fine.”

Perry remained tense. “...but what about the babies…”

Laf remained silent as they looked at Charlie, finally asleep in Perry’s arms.

“I don’t know, Perr,” they said at last, “I just don’t know.”

They stood there silently for several minutes, just watching Charlie sleep before Laf sighed quietly, nodding towards the crib.

Perry reluctantly nodded in agreement, gently lowering Charlie into the crib. Charlie stirred momentarily at the movement, but settled back into slumber. Laf checked that the monitor was on and the two quietly left the room and went back downstairs.

“You forgot your phone,” Laf said absently, taking it from the duffle bag that they’d left on the kitchen table, “you tossed it on the bed when you ran out.”

“Oh… thank you,” said Perry, looking around the room, though settling on nothing in particular, “we should… I guess we should go set ourselves up in one of the spare bedrooms upstairs.”

“I’ll take our bag up,” said Laf, “though honestly, I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep until we get some news.”

Perry nodded numbly. “Same. You mind if we put on a movie? I don’t think I’m going to be able to focus on much else.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” said Laf as they took the bag up the stairs.

Walking into the living room, Perry selected a DVD, not really paying attention to what case she’d grabbed from the shelf. She placed it in the player and started the movie before sitting down, not focusing on the screen at all.

“Huh, Blazing Saddles,” said Laf, startling Perry out of her reverie, “interesting choice. I guess a comedy is worth a try. Here.” Laf handed Perry a steaming mug before taking a seat beside her.

Perry took a whiff, chamomile tea. Probably from Carmilla’s stash. “Thank you.” She took a sip before placing it down and snuggling into LaFontaine, who clung to her just as tenaciously.

For the next little while, they sat and tried to pay attention to the screen in front of them but found their attention wandering. Perry was staring at the baby monitor, listening to the soft staticky sounds of a sleeping baby, when the phone rang.

Perry’s hand shot out and grabbed the phone, not bothering to check the screen. “Hello? Laura? Danny?”

_“Hey Perr, it's me,”_ said Danny.

Perry switched the phone to speaker. “How's Carmilla?”

Danny sighed. _“She's doing fine. She's awake… or was, Laura was trying to coax her back to sleep. They're keeping her overnight for observation, but Zeke's confident she'll be fine.”_

Laf and Perry shared a glance, both noting the missing information.

“...and?” asked LaFontaine tentatively.

Danny sighed. _“W—”_ Her voice caught. _“We lost one of the babies.”_

Perry's heart clenched as her hand flew to her mouth. Unbidden, tears began flowing down her face. Looking up, she could see that LaFontaine had gone stone faced, though their eyes were shining with unshed tears.

“Oh Danny…” said Perry, “I'm so sorry.”

_“...thanks Perr.”_

“Can we do anything?” asked Laf, “bring something by?”

There was a pause before Danny spoke. _“No, I… I don’t think so. Carm is only going to be here until morning. I’m going to stay here with her and Laura will head back to take care of Charlie. Then you guys can go home and get some sleep.”_

“Danny, neither of you has to leave Carmilla. We are more than happy to take care of Charlie,” said Perry.

“Honestly, I doubt we’re going to get much sleep ourselves,” said Laf, “we may as well help out.”

_“If you're sure…”_

“We know where you keep all her stuff and I noticed you have plenty of pumped milk for her,” said Laf.

“Take care of your wife, sweetie,” said Perry, “your daughter is in good hands.”

_“Thank you, guys,”_ said Danny, _“I guess we'll see you in the morning.”_

“Try to get some rest,” added Perry.

_“Yeah, we'll try. You two as well.”_

“Will do, Dan’,” said Laf, “give Laura and Carm our love.”

_“I will. Love you guys.”_

“We love you too, sweetie,” said Perry, “good night.”

_“Night.”_

Perry ended the call and looked sadly at LaFontaine. Without a word, they both shuffled towards each other and embraced in a tight hug. They remained there in silence until the sound of Charlie fussing came through the baby monitor.

“Can you warm a bottle?” asked Perry, getting up and heading for the stairs.

“Sure,” they said.

Going to the nursery, Perry picked up Charlie and changed her before carrying her down to the kitchen where she found Laf testing the milk's temperature on their wrist.

“That was quick,” said Laf. They took Charlie and began feeding her the bottle, “at this rate, by the time we have one of our own, we're gonna be seasoned veterans.”

Perry remained silent. She hugged herself tightly and frowned.

“What?” asked Laf.

“Are we gonna be able to have one of our own?” asked Perry, “we've been struggling to get pregnant nearly as much as Carmilla was. What if I'm not able to get pregnant? Or worse, I am, but…”

Laf looked between their wife and the infant in their arms. “I know. It's scary. Really fucking scary, if I'm being absolutely honest,” they said, “but… I think it's worth it to keep trying. And if that doesn't work, then we start adopting.” They placed the empty bottle on the counter and lifted Charlie to burp her. “Hell, we may as well try both at once. You never know, all our good luck might happen at once and we’ll get two wonderful children to love and raise.”

Perry smiled and walked over to them, resting a hand on their hip. “I love you. I'm tired and stressed, it's hard to stay rational.”

“I never said you were being irrational. It's perfectly reasonable to be scared of that stuff, tonight more than ever,” they said, “life’s kinda crappy that way.”

“Mmm,” agreed Perry, resting her forehead against them, “why don't we put the little one back down and try to get some rest ourselves.”

“I really don't know if I can fall asleep,” said Laf, as they started back up the stairs.

“I doubt I can either,” said Perry, grabbing the baby monitor and following after, “but we should try and regardless, I just really need to cuddle right now.”

Laf looked thoughtful. “Y'know what? So do I.” They put Charlie back down in her crib, joined their wife in the spare room and turned out the lights.

x-x-x

“Hey there, easy now.”

Laura slowly opened the door and entered the house, followed by Carmilla and Danny wrapped arm in arm. The house was filled with the warm smells of fresh baking.

“Hello?” called Laura.

“Hey, your mommies are home!” said Perry as she carried Charlie to her mothers. She handed Charlie to Laura, who hugged the infant close.

“I’m so happy to see you,” said Laura as Carmilla and Danny pressed close, trying to be nearer to their daughter.

Perry smiled at the exchange and returned to the kitchen to give the family some privacy. Several minutes later, the three of them followed after, still bunched around their daughter.

“Welcome home,” said Perry, “we weren’t certain when you were getting back so I just baked some muffins and croissants earlier that I can warm up if you like.”

Danny chuckled. “I’d call that a little beyond ‘just’ Perr, but you have no idea how much I’d appreciate that.”

“I’ve got a small nest of pillows set up in the living room if you guys want to take a load off,” said Laf.

“You two are amazing,” said Carmilla, already limping towards the inviting pile of cushions, “wait, are some of these yours?”

“yep,” said Laf, “we figured you three could do with a little extra plush. You all must be exhausted.”

“I can’t say claim that it was the most restful night I’ve ever had,” said Laura, “though still better than some I’d had at Silas. Did you two get any sleep with little miss fretful here?”

“Charlie was an angel. Despite our expectations, we managed to get a few hours,” said Perry before her expression became more sombre, “and… how _are_ all of you… after…?”

All three women became very quiet, the answer written all over their faces. Laf quickly wrapped Carmilla and Danny in a hug while Perry came up beside Laura.

“I’m so sorry,” said Lafontaine.

“We both are,” echoed Perry.

“Thanks you two,” said Danny, “for all this too. We are so lucky to have you.”

“I think…” said Carmilla, “I think we’ll be alright. This hurts… hell, does this hurt. But the light hasn’t gone out this time.” She laid a hand across her belly. “This one’s a fighter and I’ll be damned if I succumb to despair while they’re still here.”

Danny wiped tears away. “Damn straight.”

“Well, we’re here with you,” said Laf.

“That we are,” agreed Perry, giving Laura one final squeeze before bustling into the kitchen, “and on that note, go sit down. I’ll bring you some breakfast.”

Laura started to protest, but seemed to think better as she sagged and gave Perry a grateful smile before joining her wives in the living room. Lafontaine came into the kitchen to help out Perry.

“Should I make some coffee? Will they want coffee?” debated Perry as she slid a pan of croissants and muffins into the oven to warm up..

“Let’s save the coffee until after they’ve gotten decent nights sleeps,” said Laf, “there was some nice rooibos in that tea stash that should go well instead.”

“Good idea,” said Perry, opening the fridge “and some blood for Carmilla, just in case she needs it.” She selected the plastic pitcher of A neg and poured some into a double boiler to warm up.

Laf put some water on to boil and walked to the living room to ask who wanted tea. However, they ended up returning very quickly.

“Uh, Perr, I think we’ll have to put breakfast on hold for the moment,” said Laf, jerking their head behind them.

Perry walked to the door and smiled at what Laf was referring to. On the couch, surrounded and supported by cushions; Carmilla, Laura and Danny had all fallen fast asleep with Charlie napping securely between Carmilla and Laura.

Perry and Laf quietly returned to the kitchen and turned everything off again.

“Let them sleep,” said Perry, with a smile, “life's interrupted them enough for now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I don't think I've gotten this serious in a while. Guess I was just feeling a bit melancholy this week. I hope you all liked it regardless and I'll try to have something a little more jovial next week.
> 
> Cheers!


	87. Be Who You Want To Be: Through Fire And Flame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kids revisit a world of their imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sky, 11; Mercy, 12; Drix, 14; Aaron, Charlie and Hazel, 15.

“Would you care for one lump or two?”

Sun shone across the terrace, drenching the two young women in the gentle warmth of mid-spring. It was a perfect day to enjoy tea outside. Below, the gardens were bright and fragrant with thousands of colourful spring blooms and a gentle buzz filled the air as bees floated happily from flower to flower.

“Just one, I think today,” said the first, “I find this particular blend does well with a little less sweetness.”

“It certainly does smell like it has a touch more spice than last week’s darjeeling,” said the second, pouring the steaming tea into the fine china cups.

“I felt it appropriate for today, it’s been months since it’s been pleasant enough to enjoy tea in the sunshine.”

“Pardon me, ma’ams,” said the butler as he approached, “I’m terribly sorry to interrupt, but I’m afraid an anonymous missive has just arrived for you.” He held out a silver platter with a plain white envelope.

x-x-x

“Uh… Drix?” asked Mercy, looking at the folded piece of paper her brother had presented them on a dinner plate, “what is this?”

“We overheard you guys”—he pointed at Charlie and Hazel waving from the couch inside—”and thought you could use a little more excitement,” he said with a grin.

Sky looked at him with annoyance. “We’re having a tea party. It’s not supposed to be exciting.”

Drix just smirked. “Alright, one: there are no stuffed animals filling chairs and those mugs aren’t empty, hardly a proper tea party.”

Mercy frowned. “But—

“Two,” he continued, “that is not tea, but hot chocolate.”

“I don’t actually like tea that much,” said Sky.

“And three: trust me.” He held out the plate towards Sky.

Sky looked to Mercy, who simply shrugged before taking the paper. As she opened it and read the letter, she began to smile.

“What is it?” asked Mercy.

x-x-x

“Dear Ms. Kristie… or should I say…” Kelly looked at her companion with concern. “The Sky Watcher.”

Allison spat her tea out, coughing as she tried to clear her throat.

_ “Gross, Mercy.” _

_ “If only we had some kind of butler to clean up this mess. If you would... Pendleton.” _

_ “I hate you, so much right now.” _

_ “C’mon, isn’t this more exciting?” _

“What?!” Allison said as Pendleton began wiping up the spill.

Kelly just shook her head before reading. “I hope this letter finds you in good health, this will be so much less fun if you’re not. I would like to invite you to join me at a little party I’m holding in the abandoned warehouse district tonight. Please make sure you’re prompt or I may just have to send another letter to the press and oh, how interesting that would be. Don’t you agree? See you soon. Regards…” Kelly looked up at Allison. “Doctor Nicola Ember. P.S. Please pass on my invitation to dear Ms. Averbrook. It wouldn’t be a party without both of you.”

“Well, I suppose that means our weekend is planned for us now,” remarked Allison.

“You really think we should go?” asked Kelly, “it might be a trap.”

“Might be?” remarked Allison, “of course it’s a trap. It couldn’t be a more obvious trap if she’d written ‘totally not a trap, please help yourself to the giant piece of cheese when you arrive, pay no mind to its large springy platform.’”

“Alright, we should make a plan, get our equipment ready,” she started to get up when Allison set a hand on her arm.

“You’re right, but let’s take a moment and finish our tea. We have time and we’ll be more ready if we come at this calmly.”

Kelly paused, taking a moment to watch a honeybee lazily float past. “You’re right, especially since this fine blend deserves to be appreciated.

x-x-x

“Y’know, it really woulda been helpful if Ember had given us a specific address,” complained Small Mercy.

“She wants us there,” said Sky Watcher as she swooped out over the water, turning back towards shore to make another pass, “I’m sure she’ll have left us some sign.”

“Either that, or she’s off perpetrating some other crime while we’re here flying in circles,” suggested Mercy.

“I suppose that’s possible, but wha—” Sky spun hard to the right as a ball of flame that she’d barely spotted in time flew through the space where she’d been just a moment before.

“Oh good,” deadpanned Mercy, “she didn’t stand us up. Did you see where that came from?”

“Not exactly, just a general direction” said Sky, “I’ll land somewhere nearby and we can start looking.”

Cautiously, she set down into an alley between two of the warehouses.

“Should we split up? Cover more ground?” asked Mercy.

“Mmm… no,” decided Sky, “she probably knows where we are… or where  _ I _ am actually?” She rubbed her chin. “Get smaller and hide on me.”

“On you? Like in your pocket? No way, you never clean those out. I’ll get attacked by a three year old mint or something,” said Mercy.

“What about… in my hair or something? Ride inside my collar,” said Sky.

“Fine,” said Mercy, walking along Sky’s shoulder as she further reduced her own size, “you better not have lice.” 

Sky Watcher rolled her eyes at her partner's complaints as she started to creep forward, trying her best to keep to the shadows. It wasn't long before she came across what looked like a mortar, set up in the intersection between four buildings.

Sky looked cautiously for any signs of people around, but the area remained quiet. “I think I found what tried to shoot us down,” said Sky, “though not the ‘who’.” She knelt down to inspect the device. The salty smell of spent gunpowder still lingered in the air. 

“Looks like it was probably a one time use kinda thing,” came Mercy's voice from below her right ear, “like an oversized roman candle. Question is then, where is our erstwhile pyrotechnic?”

“Not certain,” said Sky before shoving the mortar experimentally. The thing barely budged, it was so heavy. Tapping her lips thoughtfully with a finger, she looked at the ground, noticing a series of scrapes leading from the mortar to one of the nearby warehouses, “but that might be a clue.” She followed the scuffs to a closed door not far away.

“Alright, we found the place. We gonna fly up to a skylight? Crawl in through a vent?” asked Mercy.

“I dunno, I was just gonna walk in the door,” said Sky.

“...what?”

“Well, she knows we can fly and shrink, so she's probably expecting us to go that way. I mean who would be stupid enough to actually walk through the front door,” said Sky, “trust me, she'll never be expecting it.”

x-x-x

“I can't believe you were stupid enough to just walk in the front door,” said Ember, laughing her head off as she paced in front of Sky, who was restrained to a chair. She looked much the same as the last time they'd seen her but for a mask covering the right side of her face.  “I mean I’m honestly disappointed you didn't try the skylights. The traps I had set up up there were far more interesting than the boring flashbang you set off.”

“Sorry I wasn't able to provide you sufficient entertainment,” said Sky sarcastically, “now what is this about?”

“Why, revenge, of course,” said Ember, tapping her mask, “well, that and money. I decided to multitask and have one of the city's casinos knocked over while we were busy playing.”

“Told ya,” came Mercy's quiet voice while a door at the far side of the room burst open.

A woman in a brown coat and flat cap came in followed by a small group of similarly dressed thugs. “'Ey boss! Me an’ th’ boys made a right good lift, we did!”

x-x-x

“Hazel, what is with you and the accents?” asked Charlie.

“What? They're fun!”

“You sound like Burt from Mary Poppins,” said Aaron.

“I do not. I sound like a rough and tumble, lowlife hooligan,” said Hazel.

“I have no idea what that means,” said Mercy, “but I like it.”

“So do I,” said Drix, “even if it  _ is _ a touch Van Dyke-eqsue.”

“Eh, I can work with that,” said Hazel.

x-x-x

“How much did you manage to get?”

“Right about a ‘undred grand, nice bit o’ dosh, if I do say so me self,” said the woman.

“Nice work, Deidre.”

_ “Deidre?!” _

_ “You wanted to play the stereotypical brit, you get the whole package.” _

_ “Bloody ‘ell.” _

“Thanks boss! It was pret’y easy wi’out any meddlin’ supers gettin’ in th’ way” 

“Funny how that works out,” said Ember, smirking at Sky, “speaking of, where is that delightful  _ little _ partner of yours?”

“I'm afraid she's busy tonight. You just gave us such short notice. It’s hard to change plans last minute,” said Sky.

“Well, I guess that’s true,” said Ember, walking closer, “I know I hate cancelling my  _ hair _ appointments.” Ember thrust her hand into Sky Watcher’s ginger locks, pulling her empty hand back with disappointment. “No matter, I’ll deal with her another time. Either of you alone seem to be pretty easy to deal with, so it’s only a matter of patience before I can squash her underfoot.”

“So what’s your big plan?” asked Sky, “another scheme for money and power?”

“Yeah, pretty much and it’s as good as gold, though you’ll forgive me if I don’t go into the nitty-gritty,” she replied, “fool me once, etcetera etcetera.” She walked over to the wall. “However, let it not be said I’m not faithful to at least  _ some _ of the classics.”

It was at this point that Sky noticed that the floor she was on had a different look to it than the platform where Ember and her cronies were standing. With a smirk, Ember hit a switch on the wall and the floor began slowly sliding open, revealing a roiling pool of heat and light.

“Lava? Where on earth did you get lava? We’re not even near a volcano,” remarked Sky.

“My dear watcher, I think you’ll find that with enough heat, anything can be lava, even the floor.”

_ “Boo!” _

_ “Quiet you.” _

“But if you’ll excuse me,” said Ember, “I really must be off.” She signaled her minions and they started leaving out the door they’d just come in.

“Is she really gonna just leave you unattended?” whispered Mercy, her voice coming from one of Sky’s pockets.

“You’re complaining?” Sky whispered back.

“No, just noting that it’s really dumb,” said Mercy, waiting for the door to clang shut before crawling out of Sky’s front pocket and leaping down to the floor. She pulled a fluff covered something off her shoulder and stuck it to Sky’s leg. “I believe this is yours.”

“Thanks, now can you get me loose?” asked Sky.

“Lemme see. Standard shackles, too bad neither of us are super strong,” said Mercy.

“Can you, like, scream them off of me?” asked Sky.

“I could, but I’m fairly certain enough amplitude to shatter steel would render your bones into a fine powder too,” said Mercy as she dragged Sky’s chair off the opening floor.

“Okay, fine. Is there a fire axe around or something?” asked Sky.

“Knowing Ember, it probably starts fires,” said Mercy, “besides, I have other tricks up my sleeve.”

“Like what?”

“Well let’s say, it’s a good thing I’m honest,” said Mercy as she shrank down even smaller than before, actually crawling into the keyhole of the shackles. There was a series of clicks before the shackles opened and dropped to the floor. “See, easy as pie,” said Mercy as she grew back to full size. “So now what? We have no clue where she’s going.”

“Well, I can think of one person who might know.”

x-x-x

“Nah, I haven’t talked to her since you blew up our operation last time.”

Tundra didn’t look up from a small ice figurine he was working on. He gestured his fingers over the sculpture, the tiny sword in the figure’s hand growing infinitesimally with each pass.

“She sent me a letter, but I tossed it out without reading it,” he said.

“Why?” asked Mercy.

He finally turned to look at them. “See this little trinket right here? I can make them smaller and more detailed than the best ice sculptors and some rich so-and-so is going to pay me ten thousand simoleons for it. This is a few days work for me. I couldn’t make anywhere near this money with Ember… and  _ this _ is legal. I can’t collect till I’m out of here, but I can settle with having a comfortable windfall waiting for me.” He chuckled. “Besides, I doubt Ember would be very happy working with me if she found out the plea bargain I cut to get my time cut to almost nothing in here.”

“Is there anything you can think of? A backup plan or side project she had going?” asked Sky.

“Hmmm…” he mused as he turned back to his work, “she always joked about how if our plan failed she’d do the bond villain thing and go after Fort Knox. She never seemed serious, especially with the focus she had, but that was always what she mentioned.”

“Wait… didn’t she say her plan was ‘good as gold’?” asked Mercy.

Sky laughed. “That she did. Even when she didn’t want to monologue, she couldn’t help but hint.”

“Yeah, sounds about right,” said Tundra.

“Well, that gives us something to go on,” said Mercy, “thanks Tundra. If you need a reference or something once you’re out, talk to Detective Jim at Precinct 4, he can get a hold of us.”

“Thanks,” he said, “and call me Chad.”

_ “Chad?” _

_ “He’s totally a Chad.” _

“Will do, take it easy Chad,” said Sky as they left the common area, the guard leading them back out the visitors’ entrance.

“So, what do you think?” said Sky.

“Well, Fort Knox is probably a little ambitious, what with being hundreds of miles away,” mused Mercy, “and I doubt she can break into a military fortress with herself and a handful of minions, regardless of how many toys she can cook up.”

“There is a small repository at the national bank downtown,” said Sky, “there’d be several million dollars worth there.”

“But how would she get it out?” asked Mercy, “assuming she’s able to keep them from locking the vault door, the gold is kept locked in a reinforced cage. She wouldn’t be able to blast her way through without damaging the bricks.”

“Hmm…” said Sky as Mercy shrank, got on her shoulder and they took off. They’d been flying in silence towards downtown for several minutes when Sky stopped dead in flight, nearly throwing Mercy off.

“Whoa! A little warning please,” said Mercy, “What’s up?”

“‘With enough heat, anything can be lava’” said Sky absently as she resumed their course, “she's gonna liquefy the gold.”

“Oh! Okay, that makes sense… that’s actually kinda clever,” remarked Mercy, “so what now? We think we know the what and the where, but we have no clue as to the when.”

“Well, it’ll likely have to be during the day, unless one of those cronies is a safe-cracker,” said Sky, “they’ll close the vault at night; time-locked if they’re smart about it.”

_ “One day…” _

_ “What was that, Hazel?” _

_ “Oh… nothing.” _

“But which day is the question,” said Mercy.

“Probably soon,” said Sky, “but all we can do right now is warn the bank and police and keep looking for cl—

A plume of flame shot out one of the upper windows of the bank, a roar echoing through the glass canyons of downtown.

“Or she’s making her move right now,” said Sky, making a beeline for the front entrance.

“Well that’s convenient,” said Mercy.

They landed and looked into the door. Ember’s minions had spread out around the room and were brandishing large unusual weapons while bystanders had been needed towards the edges of the room. Ember couldn’t be seen from their vantage point and her lieutenant was standing in the middle, giving orders.

“A’right you lot,” Deidre said, “if’n you all wan’ t’get outta ‘ere alive, ye best be keepin’ yer ‘eads down and this’ll be all over in a right jiff.”

“What do you think?” asked Sky quietly.

“Well, I could shrink and try to sneak in to try and find Ember,” suggested Mercy.

“That could work,” said Sky, “though if you get caught, these guys don’t have anything quite as survivable as ice like before.”

“Ah, good point…” said Mercy, “so, fastball special?”

Sky grinned. “Now  _ that _ sounds fun.” She quietly opened the door as Mercy slid down into her hand. “Ready?”

“Batter up!”

Sky smoothly entered the door and flung Mercy at the stooge over by the counter. In flight, she returned to full size and caught him full on in the face with a right hook, throwing him backwards over the counter. She rolled as she landed and sprang to her feet, facing the remaining minions.

From the door, Sky flowed towards the closest minion and quickly knocked him out while he was taken aback by Mercy flying across the room. The sound drew the attention of his fellow who turned and tried to level his weapon at her, but was too late as she moved in and caught him in the chin with the heel of her hand, snapping his head back and knocking him out.

“Oy! Emba’!” yelled Deidre, “ge’ ou’ ‘ere!”

“What is it Deidre?” said Ember, sticking her head out, “I’m very busy— oh. Of course you’re still alive, this is why I need to not get distracted.”

“Y’know, meditation does wonders with that,” said Sky, “all you need is a quiet place. I hear prison is great for that.”

Ember sighed. “Fine, we’re doing things this way.“ She reached into her coat and grabbed a device which she tossed at Sky who snatched it out of the air and flung it out the skylight where it erupted into flame just above the roof.

Sky fixed Ember with an annoyed gaze. “Seriously, please just stop it before someone gets hurt.”

“Oh? You mean like this?” She took out another device and tossed it at a pair of cowering civilians.

“No!” yelped Sky, diving after the bomb. She grabbed it from where it had come to rest at their feet and flung it away, throwing herself over the civilians. The blast caught her across the back, flinging her across the room.

“Sky!” yelped Mercy. Her eyes burned with rage as she turned towards the remaining cronies.

“Oh bugger,” said Deidre.

Mercy took a deep breath and let out a piercing shriek. The cone of sound distorted the air and blew Deidre and the other cronies back, slamming them into the wall, knocking them out cold. The blast also winged Ember as she ducked behind a counter, blowing the mask off her face.

Mercy ran across the room, dropping to her knees. “Sky! Sky! Talk to me!”

Sky groaned. “Well that was a kick.”

_ “That’s my line” _

_ “Gah! Mama, when did you get home?” _

_ “Don’t mind me, I’m just gonna start dinner.” _

“Are you okay?” asked Mercy.

“Well, I’m gonna be sore for a few days, but nothing feels too bad,” Sky said, “why? how do I look?”

“Well, you’re gonna have to invest in a new jacket,” said Mercy, “this one is toast… literally.”

“Aww, I liked this one,” said Sky.

“Also, you may want to look into short hairstyles,” said Mercy.

“Why?” asked Sky when when she caught the odor of singed hair, “oh…”

“Yeah, but we’ll worry about that later,” said Mercy, “all we have to do is get Ember and then we can go home.”

“Ugh, you two suck,” said Ember, drawing their attention as she staggered to her feet, shaking off the effects of the sonic blast.

“Hey wait a minute,” said Sky, “your face is just fine! What was that nonsense about revenge?”

“Revenge for spoiling my plan,” yelled Ember, “I just felt the mask added a certain… je ne sais quoi.”

“Of course you did,” said Mercy, “well, anyway, you’ll just have to add this to your revenge list. It’s over, you’ve lost. It’s time to give up.”

“Hmmm… I could do that,” said Ember, “or… and I’m just spitballing here… I could run away while you two try to stop my device from reducing the contents of the vault to sludge.”

“What?!” asked Sky.

“Well, what did you think I was doing in there after all?” asked Ember, beginning to edge towards the exit.

Sky started moving towards Ember, but staggered, still dazed from the blast.

Mercy ran up and steadied her, glaring at Ember.

“Looks like you have a choice to make,” taunted Ember, “byeeee.” She waved her fingers and scampered out the emergency exit.

“She really bugs me,” said Mercy, “c’mon, let’s go stop the bank’s assets from turning into a Dali painting.”

They walked into the vault to find what appeared to be an oversized dish heater pointed at the gold cage. The heat was intense and the bars were already starting to glow a dull red. 

“Looks like we’re just in time,” said Mercy as they walked forward, wincing against the heat.

“So should we just smash it?” asked Sky.

“Or…” said Mercy as she flipped the power switch on it’s side.

“Well that’s no fun at all,” said Sky.

“Neither’s explaining to the police why we smashed evidence,” said Mercy.

“Ugh, fine,” said Sky. 

“So, what should we do about Ember?” asked Mercy.

“She’s long gone, but I doubt we’ve seen the last of her,” said Sky.

“Well, next time she shows up, we’ll be ready for her,” said Mercy, “but until then… tea?”

“Tea sounds great.”

x-x-x

“Aaaaaand scene,” said Aaron.

“You’re right,” said Sky, “that  _ was  _ fun. Thanks!”

“Happy to oblige,” said Charlie, returning from where she’d ‘fled’ down the hallway.

“I didn’t really get to play this time, but it was certainly fun to watch. Four out of five; would recommend,” said Drix.

“Only four? Why not five?” said Charlie, affronted.

“Well… you left a plot thread hanging,” said Drix, “Ember still knows their secret identities.”

“Huh, I guess she does,” said Mercy, “well, I guess we’ll just have to pummel it outta her next time.”

“I don’t think that’s how heroes work,” said Hazel.

“We’ll do it heroically,” said Mercy, “to save orphans or something.”

“I’m all of a sudden very afraid for next time,” said Charlie.

“I’m sure it’ll be fun,” said Drix, “on an unrelated note, can I have your stereo?”

Charlie smacked Drix with a pillow.

“Oh no, I the innocent butler have been struck down by the master criminal, oh woe is me.”

“So what’s next for our heroes?” mused Aaron.

“Kids, dinner!” called Carmilla.

“Coming Mama,” replied Mercy, “apparently a full stomach.”

“Now that’s a scenario I can really dig my teeth into,” he said.

He had to quickly scamper out of the room as several pillows started towards his head.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, I hope you all enjoyed this little departure from our normal fare. I've been wanting to do another of these for a while and this just seemed like a good time.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed it!


	88. Arrows in the Quiver

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valentine's Day in the Hollis household.

Something was tickling Laura’s nose.

Laura’s dreams began to dissolve as the light sensation moved up to her forehead and danced down her face, lingering on her lips for an extra moment. With a slight groan as she woke up, Laura opened her eyes to see Danny’s smiling face inches from her own and a rosebud floating in the space between them.

Laura smiled, blinking sleepily. “Mmm… good morning.”

“Good morning love,” said Danny, moving the rose out of the way to lean in a gently place a kiss upon Laura’s lips, “happy Valentine’s day.”

Laura hummed happily, stretching her arms before draping them lazily around Danny’s neck. “Happy Valentine’s to you too.” She pulled Danny in, kissing her slowly and languidly; letting the delicious moment stretch out to a point neither of them were in a hurry to reach.”

“Mmm… no fair.” Warmth pressed up against Laura’s back as a new hand brushed over Laura’s shoulder, down her arm and up onto Danny’s, gently caressing her wrist. On her neck, Laura felt a new set of lips gently pepper a series of kisses.

“Aww Carm,” whined Danny, “you went and spoiled part two.” She leaned forward, Laura turning her head to watch the two embrace.

“What was part two?” purred Carmilla, “should I pretend to be asleep so you two can ravish me?”

“I think we’re a torn bodice short for a proper ravishing,” said Danny, “and no, I was gonna get Laura to help me wake you up with strawberries.” Danny got up off the floor, grabbing a pint of strawberries that had previously gone unnoticed on the bed stand.

“Oh?” said Carmilla. She slowly rolled over, along with Laura, to keep her eyes on Danny as she walked around the bed and crawled up Carmilla’s other side and kneeled beside her wife, strawberries in hand, “and what would that entail?”

“Well…” said Danny, letting her voice drop into a sultry register, “first, I was going to give one of the strawberries to Laura… like this”—she reached across Carmilla, passing the strawberry within an inch of Carmilla’s lips and handing it to Laura—”then I take one of my own”—Danny mulled over her own selection before selecting a smaller, particularly red, berry—”and then…” In one smooth motion, Danny upended the basket over Carmilla’s head, drawing a rare surprised squeak from the vampire.

“Danny!” scolded Laura, scooching up to protectively hug Carmilla as she scowled at Danny, “that’s an awful thing to do.”

“I dunno,” said Danny smugly, “somehow I think she’ll agree that the way you’re pressing your boobs into her face is an acceptable outcome.”

“This is somewhat satisfactory,” said Carmilla, slightly muffled.

Laura rolled her eyes with a smile, but made no attempt to move. “Well, be that as it may. I still think you owe her some sort of apology.”

Danny smirked. “Well, if you insist.” Danny brought the strawberry she was holding to her lips and, satisfied that she had her wives’ attention, slowly bit into it. Discarding the leaf, she leaned in and pressed her lips to Carmilla's. “Did that make it all better?” she asked as she pulled back, opting to rest her head against Laura's chest, much to the smaller woman's amusement.

Carmilla, a bit dazed and blissful, absently chewed the strawberry in her mouth and swallowed it. “Yes. Yes it does.”

They all chuckled and Laura started to get up, turning to collect some of the wayward strawberries before she was gently pulled back to her previous position.

“No,” said Carmilla, “you’re comfy.” She nuzzled further into Laura’s boobs, prompting a bemused smile from her.

“So I’m just a pillow to you?” she asked.

“You’re not just a pillow,” said Danny, copying Carmilla, “you’re a very good pillow!”

“You’re lucky I love both of you,” mused Laura.

“That we are,” agreed Carmilla, “so soft…”

With that, Laura grabbed an actual pillow and smacked the both of them before extricating herself from their arms and getting out of bed. “I’m going to go get out the cards and chocolate for the kids and then start breakfast. I’ll let you two deal with cleaning up.” Laura grabbed her housecoat from the closet and popped on a pair of fuzzy cat slippers before giving them a wink and heading downstairs. “I’m thinking chocolate chip pancakes.”

“Dammit,” said Carmilla, “what are we gonna do now?”

“Well, I don’t know about you,” said Danny, adjusting her position, “but as for me…” She lowered her head onto Carmilla’s chest, fully intending to put the shoe on the other foot. However, instead of warm softness, Danny encountered a cold squelch as one of the strawberries got caught between her cheek and it’s target. Danny jerked her head back up, the berry still stuck to her cheek.

Carmilla tugged at her tank top, eyeing the red stain with a frown. “Well, I suppose the colour is at least in keeping with the theme of the day.”

“Yeah, but that’s a mood killer if I ever saw one,” said Danny, picking the berry off her cheek, “c’mon, let’s clean up and go help. If we don’t hurry, more chocolate chips will end up in Laura rather than in the pancakes.”

“Good point,” said Carmilla as she cast off the sheets and began fishing up all the strawberries strewn around her.

x-x-x

“Alright,” said Danny, putting down the theatre printout on the table, “I’ve got us six tickets to the movies. Showtime is at seven-oh-five and we can grab a bite at the diner beforehand.”

“Won’t they be busy?” asked Laura.

“Nah,” said Danny, “I mean, I love the place, but it rates a solid nada on the romance-o-meter.”

“Even the ice cream parlour is gonna be busier and it’s twenty-six degrees out there,” noted Carmilla.

“Alright, fair enough,” said Laura, who seemed to be thinking something over, “guys? D’you think we should be doing something more… valentinesy?”

“Plenty of people go to the movies for Valentine’s,” said Danny.

“Yeah, but not usually big superhero movies… and not with their kids,” said Laura.

“Y’hear that,” interrupted Charlie, an obnoxious grin on her face as looked at them over the back of the couch, “Mom doesn’t love us anymore. So sad.”

“That’s not what I—”

“I always knew this day would come,” said Drix, “I guess it’s off to the workhouse with us.”

“But, what—”

“Dibs on the flealess bed!” added Mercy.

“Would you three cut it out?!” said Laura in exasperation.

The three kids just burst out laughing, with a few added chuckles from Carmilla and Danny.

“We won’t have to leave for dinner for a few hours yet,” said Charlie, “why don’t the three of you go do something together?”

“That ice cream idea wasn’t bad,” suggested Drix, “so long as you don’t try to go with a stroll with your cones. I don’t think frostbite would be very romantic.”

“Y’know? That’s not a bad idea,” said Carmilla, the other two nodding, “I could totally go for a scoop of neapolitan.”

“Just a scoop?” said Laura, as they went to get their coats, “c’mon, we at least I have to spring for toppings… if not an entire parfait!”

“Let’s not go nuts, we’re still going out for dinner later,” said Danny.

“Ooh, nuts. Totally need some crushed almonds or something,” said Laura, beginning to bounce with excitement.

“We’ll see,” said Carmilla, leading the way out the door, “we don’t want a repeat of the time—”

The door closed behind them, cutting off the conversation.

“Nicely done, Charlie,” said Drix.

“Eh, I saw an opportunity and went for it,” she said, “I figured it’d be less suspicious than Grandpa Joe suddenly needing all three of them to help clean his basement.”

“They’ll probably be in a better mood when they get back too,” said Mercy.

“Probably,” said Charlie, “alright, you call Grandma Bev to tell her the change of plans and I’ll call Aaron.”

“On it,” said Drix.

x-x-x

“That… was a great idea,” said Danny as they pulled into the garage. Reluctantly, she let go of Laura and Carmilla’s hands where they’d been clasped together over the centre console so that she could properly park the car.

“It was,” said Carmilla, “I’m glad we did it.” She leaned over the console to softly kiss Danny before turning to kiss Laura as well.

“Me too,” said Laura, turning to smooch Danny as well before hopping out of the car.

“So what time do we want to get going for dinner?” asked Carmilla.

“I’d say pretty quick,” said Danny as Laura opened the door inside, “we spent quite a while being all moony-eyed at… each...other…”

As they walked into the house, an incredible smell filled their senses. Quickly dropping their coats and shoes, they came into the kitchen to find Drix and Mercy flitting about the table, set for three, pouring wine and lighting candles. In the kitchen, Aaron was shaking a pan over the heat, occasionally flipping it’s contents while Charlie looked to be plating a trio of bright green salads on the island.

“Perfect timing!” said Charlie, taking two of the salads to the table, Mercy scampering over for the last one.

“What is all this?” asked Laura.

“Why a romantic Valentine’s evening, of course!” declared Drix, “complete with a three course meal, courtesy of our ‘totally gonna have his own restaurant one day’ best friend.”

Aaron blushed. “Well, I appreciate the vote of confidence, but it’s nothing all that fancy. Has to be able to keep warm so you can eat at your own pace after all.”

“Nothing all that fancy,” scoffed Charlie, “Green Salad to start, braised lamb with roast potatoes and sauteed green beans and chocolate mousse for dessert.”

Carmilla gaped. “You did this all while we were out?”

“Nah,” said Mercy, “we’ve been planning this for a while now. Just been keeping all the prep in Aaron’s basement fridge.”

“Well, you guys, this is amazing. Thank you!” said Danny.

“You deserve it, Mom,” said Charlie, walking over to give her mother a hug.

“I’m guessing you all have other plans, given there’s only three settings,” said Carmilla.

Charlie pulled out the theatre printout. “Well, we just happen to have some movie tickets. Seems a shame to waste them.”

“And then a sleepover at my place!” said Aaron, who looked absolutely delighted.

“Elsie’s okay with that?” checked Laura.

“Okay? It was her idea,” said Aaron, “something about ‘minimum safe distance’.”

The three women blushed but also smiled slyly as they glanced at each other.

“Nope, nope, stop it,” said Drix, “I mean, yes, that’s the point of us skedaddling, but please save those looks for after your children make a safe exit. We don’t need those images running around in our heads.”

Danny blushed harder and shuddered, old memories of her own floating to the surface. “Alright, fair point. We’ll hold off.”

“Thank you,” said Charlie, “now if I’m not mistaken, I think we’re ready to go.”

“You would be correct,” said Aaron, popping the skillet into the oven “now the main course is keeping warm in here, so just help yourself when you’re ready. Same goes for dessert in the fridge.”

“Thank you, Aaron,” said Laura, “it smells amazing.”

“You’re welcome. Enjoy!” he said.

“Alright,” said Charlie, “usual preamble about cell phones, etcetera etcetera, you know how to reach us if you need to. We should probably go pick up Hazel and Sky if we’re going to have time for dinner before the show.”

“They cook dinner for Laf and Perry too?” asked Carmilla.

“No, Perry beat them to the punch,” said Mercy, “but with two extra tickets and an open door at Aunt Elsie’s, giving them an empty house for the evening too seemed the right move.”

“Smart thinking, Perry’s a screamer,” joked Carmilla.

Drix groaned. “Please no. Previous statements apply to spiritual parents as well.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Fine. Spoilsport.”

“On that note, we’re gonna get going before one of us ends up scarred,” said Charlie, making for the door, “have a lovely evening.”

“Will do, thank you all again,” said Laura.

The three waved as the kids went out the door, listening for the sound of the car starting and garage door opening.

“Alright, who else is tempted to just leave dinner and just start taking advantage of the empty house?” asked Carmilla.

“Tempted, yes,” said Danny, “but they went to so much trouble and it really does smell incredible. I honestly want to dig in.” She pulled out a chair, gesturing Carmilla to it.

“Fine, we’ll eat the amazing dinner that our fantastic kids made up for us,” said Carmilla with mock reluctance as she sat down, “but after dessert… we have  _ dessert. _ ” She reached out and caressed Laura’s arm as she sat down.

“Sounds great,” said Laura, reaching back to touch Danny, who caressed Laura’s fingers in turn.

“It’s a deal,” said Danny as she sat, “and I’ll throw in some strawberries that I just had lying around.”

The three shared a chuckle before settling into a dinner lovingly crafted food and lovingly gentle touches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huh, this started just as 'kids cook dinner'. I have no idea where the boob pillow antics came from, but it was fun to write regardless.
> 
> Hope everyone has a great Valentine's Day, however you spend it.


	89. A Moving Experience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls set about moving into their new house... and get distracted... a lot.

“Hey, do you know where our drinking glasses are?”

Laura turned to look at Carmilla where her head was buried in a cardboard box labeled ‘kitchen - FRAGILE’. One by one, she was pulling items out, unwrapping them to reveal several pieces of their kitchenware, none of which were the glasses in question.

“I’m not certain, try towards the bottom,” said Laura slyly, her eyes sliding to her fiancée’s backside.

Carmilla, with her hands still in the box, turned her head to look at Laura, smirking at her eye line. “I don’t think you’ll find what we’re looking for back there.”

“Correction, I won’t find what  _ you’re _ looking for,” said Laura, not bothering to shift her gaze, “my current objective, however, seems to be satisfied.”

“Well, I can’t really blame you,” said Carmilla, returning her attention to the box, “but I think it’d be more helpful if you dug into one of these boxes. I need a pick me up and I really don’t like drinking blood straight from the bag.”

“Fine, but under protest,” said Laura as she grabbed a nearby box and opened it, only half paying attention to what she was doing as she inevitably kept getting distracted.

“Alright,” said Danny as she came down the stairs, “I think I’ve got all our clothes unpacked and put aw— well, there’s a sight to bolster a weary soul.”

Carmilla chuckled. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”

“Way ahead of you,” said Danny as the flash went off.

“Truly a moment for posterity,” quipped Carmilla.

“I think you mean posterior-ity,” said Laura.

Carmilla groaned. “Ugh, okay just for that, if I can’t find these glasses in the next five minutes, I’m eating you instead.”

Laura’s mind, already comfortably in the gutter took that and ran with it to the obvious conclusion. Enjoying the daydream, she grinned before straightening her face. “Oh... no... woe is me.”

“Laura, isn’t that one of the glasses in your hand there?” asked Danny.

“Shhhhhaddup,” said Laura, making a show of hiding the glass in her hand.

Danny rolled her eyes as she walked over. “Laura, you know the rules. None of that when she's actually hungry.”

“Ugh, fine. You're right. Sorry Carm,” said Laura, handing it over to the vampire, “if it's any consolation, I only found them a second ago.”

“I'd find that suspect if you hadn't just opened that box,” said Carmilla, “but you still owe me a back rub for that.”

“Done and done,” said Laura, the glint reappearing in her eyes, “may I suggest our lovely bed? It'll be much easier to… relax… up there.”

“Well,” said Carmilla, her voice dropping and becoming smooth as silk, “I suppose we oughta stop what we're doing...” She started to slowly sashay towards Laura.

Laura's mouth went dry. “...yeah.”

She draped her arms around Laura's neck, bringing her lips within millimetres of Laura's ear. She smirked at the goosebumps that raised along Laura's neck as her breath danced over the skin. “…take a nice, looooong break…”

“Yep,” squeaked Laura. She'd gone completely red. She wouldn't be surprised, in fact, if steam was blowing out of her ears.

“...and go take a look around our new home town!” Carmilla spun on her heel and grabbed her coat off the counter, taking a generous swig of blood before throwing it on and heading towards the garage.

“What?” said Laura. She looked like a kicked puppy who'd just been told Santa Claus wasn't real.

“What is with you?” asked Danny with amusement.

“New house, no neighbours,” said Laura, staring manically at Danny and pointing in all directions.

“And no noise complaints,” said Danny, nodding sagely, “you make a good point, Babe.”

“Y'see! Now if—”

“Too bad we have a town to tour!” Danny quickly scampered after Carmilla.

Laura was left in the middle of the kitchen, her mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water before it finally snapped shut and her face scrunched up in frustration.

“Still adorable,” commented Carmilla, her face popping out from around the corner, “now c'mon.” She disappeared again and Laura could hear their car starting in the garage.

Laura glared at the empty space where Carmilla's head had been before finally stomping after them, tearing her jacket off the doorknob where it was hanging on her way by.

Heading out to the garage, she made her way around the idling car, getting into the backseat and crossing her arms with a pout. “Why do we need to look around town anyways? It's not like we don't know it already.”

“Yes, but now we  _ live _ here,” said Danny, “time to learn this place like a local.”

“Danny… you grew up here, I don't know how much more 'local' you can get,” said Laura, “and I grew up in the next town over, so I'm hardly an outsider.”

“Okay, that's a good point to which I offer two ironclad rebuttals,” said Danny, “one: we haven't actually lived here in at least four years, longer in my case.”

“Ok, fine. You have a point,” conceded Laura.

“And B:”—she smirked at Laura's annoyance in the mirror—”our lovely fiancée hasn't lived here before and therefore needs to be taught to walk walks, talk talks, etcetera etcetera.”

Carmilla turned and hit Danny with a deadpan stare.

“Ok fine, acclimatize our moody fiancée to the locals so she doesn't eviscerate them,” Danny conceded as she backed the car out of the garage.

“I wouldn't eviscerate them just for annoying me. You act like I'm still that wound up, under pressure vampire you met all those years ago,” said Carmilla, “worst I'll do is chew on them slightly, for educational purposes.”

“Can you please not?” asked Danny, “I really don't want to answer the door to our green grocer with you gnawing off his elbow.”

“I would never do that to Mr. Parsons,” said Carmilla, “he actually has the wherewithal to tell I don't want his whole ‘nice to see you, how 'bout that weather?’ schtick. Now, that damn butcher on the other hand…”

“I still don't get why you don't like Kyle,” said Laura.

“Just, how can he be so happy all the time?” said Carmilla with irritation.

“I think it runs in the family,” said Danny, “his sister is the same way. Always smiling. It suits both of them, though.”

Laura faked a gasp. “Daniela Lawrence. Has someone else caught your eye? Competition for our affections?”

Danny chuckled. “Nah, not really. I mean, she was certainly head turning back in the day. But she doesn't live in town anymore. I think she's in marine biology? Maybe? Something about spending time with sharks.”

“Well good,” said Laura, “otherwise I'd have to introduce her to something else with sharp teeth.” She reached over the seat and rubbed Carmilla's shoulder.

“Excuse me,” said Carmilla, “using me as some kind of attack dog aside—”

“That's my job,” joked Danny.

“Well yes,” agreed Carmilla, “but I think we owe Danny a little more trust than that.”

“I was totally joking,” said Laura, “but yes, you're right. Danny, I'm sorry.”

Danny waved her hand. “It's fine. Elsie once was looking for help with a class and uttered the phrase ‘study buddy’. I nearly flung her out the window.”

“A fair and measured response,” said Carmilla, “and you know what's alot like windows? Display cases.”

“No. No maiming Kyle,” said Danny, “he’s got the best cuts and doesn't ask questions when we need enough raw beef to feed a nature documentary worth of carnivores.”

“Ugh, fine,” said Carmilla, “but can we give him a pass today? I'm just really not in the mood.”

“You're never in the mood, but that's alright. We didn't really have anything in mind,” said Danny, “you're the one that wanted to explore town, what did you want to do?”

“Well, uh, about that, I kinda was just trying to tease Laura and got ahead of myself,” said Carmilla.

“The butcher’s it is!” cheered Laura, “I'm thinking a standing rib roast, something that'll take several long minutes of cheery conversation to properly cut and tie up.”

Carmilla dropped her head into her hands with a groan.

“Didn't think that petard of yours could hold your weight?” asked Danny

“Nope,” said Carmilla.

“Well, lucky for you, I'm driving, so I'll spare you the walking cavity today.”

“Thank you,” said Carmilla with no small amount of relief.

“So does that mean we can go home?” asked Laura, eagerness obvious in her voice.

“Wow, it hadn't hit me yet. That house is home now.  _ Our _ home,” said Danny, putting her hand on Laura's where it was still resting on Carmilla.

Carmilla blinked. “Yeah, you're right. Home…”

“I'm getting the feeling that maybe we should put our town tour on hold and go back?” asked Danny.

“Yeah, I… wait,” said Carmilla, “have either of you eaten since breakfast?”

“Actually, no, now that you mention it,” said Danny, “I'm actually feeling a bit peckish.”

“Cupcake?”

“Well, no. But I'm not actually all that—” Laura's stomach growled. “—hungry.” She pouted as Danny and Carmilla laughed.

“Y'know, I think she might be lying,” Carmilla said to Danny.

“I think you might be right.”

“Why don't we go to the diner? Get some lunch and then get some groceries,” said Carmilla, “may as well start with learning the most useful parts of town, the parts where I can get food. The rest we can play by ear.”

“That sounds like a plan,” Danny agreed, “Laura?”

“…fine.” Laura said defeatedly.

“Hey, look at it this way, if we get food now.” Carmilla turned and looked at Laura, “we’ll have more stamina later.”

Laura perked up. “Well, when you put it that way, I suppose I could go for a milkshake.”

x-x-x

Danny wiped her mouth with a napkin, leaning back with a satisfied sigh. “Now that was a beef dip. So, once we get home and get the groceries put away, I'll start getting our bathroom in order while you guys continue on with the kitchen.”

Danny was just met with a couple of disbelieving stares.

“What?” she asked.

“Really?” said Carmilla, “I think after all the teasing, you and I have some… commitments.” She nodded at Laura, who's expression could best be described as impatient.

“Ah, well, I suppose if you don't mind digging for your shampoo out of a moving box,” said Danny, “the rest could wait til tomorrow.”

“Danny, you could say I'd have to dig the shampoo out of the garden and I'd be okay with it,” said Laura, “it doesn't really—”

Laura was interrupted by the server walking up and placing a generous slice of chocolate layer cake in the middle of the table.

“Um… we didn't order this,” said Carmilla with a confused expression.

“It's on the house,” said their server, “a little ‘welcome to town’ present.”

“Wow, thanks Claire,” said Danny, “but we've been coming here for years, how'd you know?”

“It's been kinda hard to miss all the talk of movers and boxes and… other activities.” Claire grinned knowingly at Laura, who turned beet red and ducked her head, suddenly paying very close attention to the last of her milkshake. Claire chuckled. “No reason to be embarrassed, hon, it's part of the whole new house experience. I remember when me and my husband moved into our first place. We crushed a box of plates and had to learn how to repair drywall before we were fully unpacked.”

“Impressive,” said Carmilla, getting lost in thought.

“Carm, no. We're not gonna try to ‘out do’ them,” said Danny.

“No guarantees,” muttered Laura who still was otherwise too mortified to look up.

She glared at Claire who simply winked back at her.

“You're welcome,” she said with a smirk as she walked away, “and enjoy the cake.”

Carmilla grabbed her fork and dug into the cake. “Well, I'd call that an important fact about the town: The diner manager... is awesome.” She took a bite. “And the food is damn good too, though I already knew that bit.”

“Well, I coulda told you that, but I guess we can chalk it up as a success in our ‘learn the town’ efforts,” said Danny, taking a bite of the rich dessert, “oof, after this, I'm not gonna need dinner.”

Laura looked up with an enthusiastic smile.

“Yes, alright, we can take advantage of that,” said Danny, prompting an adorable victory dance from Laura, “but…” she added, making Laura pause, “we're still going grocery shopping. We've got no food of any sort for breakfast, and we're probably going to want a midnight snack at this rate.”

Laura considered this. “Deal,” she said, before resuming her dancing.

“Excellent,” said Carmilla, pushing the cake towards Laura, “now dig in. You're gonna need your energy.”

x-x-x

It was much, much later that night when three tired, happy, and very naked women wandered down the stairs into their moonlit kitchen, turning on a minimum of lights to navigate around the maze of half-unpacked boxes.

“Wow,” said Laura, “we've still got a lot to unpack.”

“Well, that's kinda what happens when you stop halfway through the day,” said Carmilla, plucking her bra from where it was hanging on the fridge handle. She tossed it onto the island before opening the fridge and digging around inside. “I'm making myself a turkey sandwich, any other takers?”

Both Danny and Laura answered in the affirmative as they gathered clothing from where it was tossed in the floor and in open moving boxes, tossing it to join the bra on the island.

“So, now that we've gotten that out of our system,” said Laura. Danny and Carmilla both gave her knowing smirks. “However temporarily, what should we work on next?”

“Well, after a good night's sleep,” said Danny, yawning lightly, “I think we should pick up where we left off and then maybe furniture shopping tomorrow afternoon. Things are looking pretty bare in here… and I'm not talking about us.”

“Beat me to it.” Carmilla chuckled.

“How much longer do you think we'll need to unpack?” mused Laura.

“If we work uninterrupted, probably two or three days,” Danny guessed.

“So about a week, maybe two,” jeered Carmilla, wiggling her eyebrows as she brought a plate of sandwiches over to the non-clothing-covered side of the island.

Danny grinned. “Yep, pretty much.”

“Well, we'll have to focus tomorrow,” said Laura around a mouthful,”my dad's coming to help us, remember?”

“Oh yeah, Zach too,” recalled Danny, “we're supposed to order pizza for lunch. What time's your dad arriving?”

“About eleven, he said.”

“Ditto for Zach,” said Danny, looking at the clock on the wall, “which means we don't need to be up til about ten-ish.” She smirked, visibly doing the math in her head.

“That late, huh?” said Laura, smirking as she followed Danny's train of thought.

Carmilla raised an eyebrow. “What happened to a good night's sleep?”

“Y'know, I think I can settle for a passable night's sleep,” said Danny as she sauntered towards the stairs, “once we're suitably tired, of course.”

“Oh, of course,” agreed Laura, following after.

Carmilla chuckled. “We're never gonna get unpacked.” Turning off the lights, she scampered up the stairs after her fiancées.


	90. Swim Pickings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the AC breaks, you gotta find other ways to deal with the heat

“Ugh… when did the building manager say the AC would get fixed?”

Sky lay draped face down across the couch, a fan on the coffee table oscillating back and forth from her head to her feet.

“She didn’t,” said Mercy, sitting cross-legged in front of a fan of her own  “her exact words were ‘We’re working on it. We’ll fix it as soon as possible.’”

“In other words, they have no idea what’s wrong and don’t know how long it’s gonna take,” said Sky.

“Yeah, pretty much,” said Mercy as timer went off in the kitchen, “ooh, they’re ready!” She scampered off.

“Ugh, thank goodness. Took long enough,” moaned Sky, remaining inert on the couch. She listened to the sound of Mercy rummaging before something freezing cold draped over her neck. “~ah!”

“Jeez, and here I thought only I could make you make those kinds of noises,” joked Mercy, wrapping the other therapy bag around her neck, “oh that’s so much better.”

Sky chuckled. “Well, if you want to get technical about it, you did.”

“Ha ha,” said Mercy, rolling her eyes as she took a seat again, “I am so glad you keep so many of these around for your dance after-care.”

“Ugh… this is the worst,” said Sky. She kicked her legs into the air impatiently. “I’m so bored! We need to do something.”

“Nuh-uh,” said Mercy, shaking her head emphatically, “as bad as it is in here, it’s so much worse out there. You’re welcome to brave that blast furnace if you want, but I’m staying right here.”

“Come on!” exclaimed Sky, “Let’s go bug Charlie and Hazel, I’ll bet their air conditioning is working. Ditto Drix and Aaron.” 

“Charlie and Hazel aren’t home, remember?” said Mercy, “remember they went to New York for that exhibit opening?”

“Oh yeah…” said Sky, “well, what about—”

“They don’t have AC,” said Mercy. leaning closer to the fan, trying to glean more coolness from the moving air.

“Seriously?” asked Sky.

“Yeah, their building is too old to have it centrally and between vampirism and working in a professional kitchen, neither of them feel the heat enough to bother with the cost.”

“Ugh… why can’t werewolves have anything for the heat?”

“We do. It’s called a fur coat. It makes it worse,” said Mercy.

A couch cushion flew past her ear and knocked over the fan.

“Hey!” yelped Mercy, “careful! or... at least aim better.”

“C’mon Merc!” begged Sky, “we could go for ice cream… or maybe swim in the lake?”

Mercy perked up. “Oh, that sounds fun.”

“What? The ice cream or the lake?”

“The lake,” said Mercy, “for ice cream, we’d either need to take the car, which probably has a current internal temperature approximating Venus, or walk, with almost no cover, into town.”

“You make a good point,” said Sky, “alright, I’m gonna go put on a bathing suit.” She finally peeled herself off the couch, moving stiffly as she walked to the bedroom.

“I’m gonna pull out the cooler and grab us some drinks and snacks,” said Mercy, “I think all in all, this is a great idea.”

x-x-x

“This was a terrible idea,” moaned Mercy.

“It’s not that bad,” said Sky, pushing aside a branch so Mercy could get by.

“Not that bad,” said Mercy, “it is so hot out here that there are not enough degrees to count it. It is all the degrees, at once.”

“What’s that in celsius?” teased Sky.

Mercy just glared at her. “You think that being in the woods would make it better. There’s shade in the woods, but no, the woods was just hiding all the humidity, where it could pounce and devour unwary travellers.”

“We’ve been walking for five minutes,” said Sky.

“Five minutes of torture,” whinged Mercy.

“Y’know, if we shifted, we could get there in a flash,” suggested Sky.

“What did I already say about fur coats?” said Mercy.

“Well, don’t we have summer coats?” asked Sky.

“Of course n—” Mercy stopped short, a finger to her lips as she considered what Sky said, “hold that thought.” She pulled out her cell phone and dialed.

_ “Hello” _ said Danny.

“Hi Mom!” said Mercy, “how are you?”

_ “I’m doing just fine, honey. Hiding inside with your mothers with the AC cranked to full. How about you?” _

“Our building’s AC is broken, so we’re going to the lake for a swim,” said Mercy.

_ “Good thinking, it’s a perfect day for it,” _

“That was our thinking,” said Mercy, “so hey, quick question…”

_ “Shoot,”  _ said Danny.

“Do we have winter and summer coats?” she asked.

_ “Well, I suppose that’s up to you and Sky,” _ said Danny, confusion obvious in her voice,  _ “I mean, I don’t really wear a coat in the summer and I have that nice down one during the winter.” _

It took every ounce of willpower for Mercy not to smack her forehead with her palm. “Mom… I mean as wolves.”

_ “Oh… OH! Duh, sorry,” _ said Danny,  _ “I can’t say yes or no for certain, it’s not like we shed to give ourselves a lighter layer —thank god, I think the vacuum would choke and die— but it certainly never seems any worse in the summer so it’s probably thinner? That or magic.” _

“Magic…” deadpanned Mercy.

_ “You’re a hundred forty pound girl that transforms into a two hundred pound werewolf,” _ said Danny,  _ “even if you could explain away somehow changing species, I’m fairly certain there is a physicist permanently crying somewhere out there from our constant violations of the law of conservation of mass.” _

“I’ve always fancied myself a bit of a lawbreaker,” joked Mercy.

_ “So long as it remains laws of physics,” _ said Danny  _ “it’s bad enough we’ve already had to bail one daughter out of jail.” _

“So my plans for the casino heist next week...”

_ “That would be a no.” _

“Spoilsport,” Mercy said with a laugh, “okay, thanks Mom. Talk to you later.”

_ “Take care, sweetie. Bye” _

“Bye mom,” said Mercy, hanging up.

“So… she doesn’t know,” said Sky, crossing her arms.

“It’s magic,” replied Mercy.

“Oh, that makes sense,” said Sky, resuming walking.

“That makes sense?” scoffed Mercy, “what kind of scientist’s daughter are you?”

“The kind who’s scientist parent makes a point of figuring out how paranormal biology works.” Sky stuck her tongue out at Mercy.

“Ugh, I hate it when you use logic to win arguments,” said Mercy.

“You love me,” teased Sky.

“Yes, I do,” agreed Mercy, “unfortunately.”

“Yep, you’re stuck with me.” Sky hooked an arm around Mercy’s shoulder as they walked.

“Okay, love is one thing, but I’m sorry babe, but it is way too hot to walk arm in arm,” said Mercy, prying herself loose.

“Yeah, fair enough,” said Sky, tugging at her tank top where she’d pressed up against her girlfriend, “the sweat to snuggles quotient is far too high today. Ugh, I need a bath.”

“Well, I think we’re in luck,” said Mercy as they pushed through onto the lake shore.

“Finally,” said Sky, dropping the bag with her towel and sunscreen on the ground. Within moments, she stripped down to her swimsuit and bounded into the water, disappearing beneath the surface with a splash. 

Putting the cooler down, Mercy shook her head fondly as she more methodically took off her own outer layers and, picking Sky’s clothes up off the ground, placed everything safely into their bag.

“C’mon in,” called Sky, “the water is absolutely perfect.”

Mercy stepped into the shallows, her feet sinking into the lake’s silty bottom. True to Sky’s word, the water temperature was divine. Blissfully cool, but not so cold that she had to edge into the water. It was only another few seconds before Mercy was out to where she could actually submerge, revelling in the relief from the heat. Coming back up, she only broke the water enough to breathe, leaving the rest of her safely ensconced from the oppressive heat. A short distance away, Sky had moved to where the water was waist deep and seemed to be dancing gently, trailing her arms along the water’s surface and occasionally lifting her legs above the surface, maintaining perfect balance as she drew them in poetic arcs, leaving gleaming trails of water in their wake. 

It was midway through one of these arcs that Sky spotted Mercy, transfixed. She froze, legs held aloft with the poise that only years of dance training could bring. Slowly, she bent her knee, bringing her toe back down to the water’s surface. Gently, she dipped it in, producing the barest ripple, before she flicked her legs, splashing water right into Mercy’s face.

“Blbrggrr,” said Mercy from beneath the water's surface before raising her head a little more, “is that the way we're gonna play it?” She moved into the shallows, arms wide.

“Hmm…” said Sky, adjusting to a more stable stance, “yes, I think we are.”

It was impossible to tell who struck first as water began to fly in a maelstrom of screams and giggles. The splash fight continued until the sound of heavy rustling from the shoreline made them pause. They went quiet, trying to see past the greenery to spot the cause.

Their question was answered in short order, however, when a large red wolf leapt from the woods and landed right beside them, covering them in a deluge of water.

x-x-x

“Are you a fictional character?”

“Yes”

“Are you a villain?”

“I'm sure I'm very misunderstood.”

“Are you Dracula?”

“Very good, you win.”

“Carm!” Laura whined as Carmilla stuck her nose back in her book, “that's what you were the past three times. Come on.”

“Cupcake, I already told you I don't want to play. I'm not gonna put the effort in to think up something new.”

“Ugh, fine,” said Laura, picking up her tablet, “maybe I can get some work done on next week's article.”

The two sat in comfortable silence for several minutes before their reverie was interrupted by the clicking of claws on the deck. They looked up to see a trio of damp wolves drop a cooler and a heavily sodden bag before shifting into three women in bathing suits. 

“I'm home,” said Danny as she stepped inside, “and I bring kids!”

“I can see that,” said Laura, “did you have fun?”

“So much fun,” said Danny.

“Mom soaked our stuff!” said Mercy as she came in the door, pointing to the bag they'd left on the deck, water noticeably seeping onto the boards.

“Danny?” asked Carmilla.

Danny blushed. “I may have been a little careless about where I jumped into the lake.”

Carmilla sighed. “Canines…”

“Well, why don't you two head upstairs?” suggested Laura, “grab a shower and some dry clothes. While you do that, your mom will go toss your stuff in the washing machine to clean off the lake water.”

“That's fair,” conceded Danny, grabbing the soaked tote bag from outside, “this'll take a while before it's done, your shoes especially. You may as well stay for dinner.”

“Wait, that was your plan the entire time, wasn't it?” said Sky.

“...maybe,” said Danny, unable to hide a smirk.

“You couldn't have just asked us over when I called?” asked Mercy.

“Nah, this was more fun,” said Danny.

“I hate this family sometimes,” said Mercy, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Oh you love them,” said Sky, bumping Mercy with her shoulder, “now come on, this bathing suit is starting to chafe.”

Mercy smiled. “Fine, you're right,” she said as they started up the stairs, “and at the very least, it helped with the heat.”

“That it did,” agreed Sky as they went in Mercy's old bedroom and shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now for my annual "I'm sick of winter, so let's think of cooling down in summer" chapter. Seriously, I looked. The water fight chapter was fourth week of february, same as this one. I hope you all enjoyed it!


	91. Pitching Campus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gus makes a surprise visit to his daughter's campus

_ Knock knock knock _

Laura looked over her shoulder. “Come in!” she called as she continued to absently comb her fingers through Carmilla's hair

“Hey you two,” said Danny as she came in the door, “I'm not interrupting anything, am I?”

Carmilla tilted her head back as far as it could go without pulling her head away from Laura's ministrations. “You? Never. You're what I like to refer to as a ‘doubling my fun’,” she said, making air quotes, “and cupcake, if you start singing I'm taking Red to cuddle over there and you won't be invited.”

Laura's mouth snapped shut, though she still sported a playful grin

Danny’s eyes sparkled with mischief as she started singing instead. “Get you skis shined up, grab a stick of—”

“No,” Carmilla deadpanned, “I swear I will walk out of here and go spend time with the mad scientist instead.”

“Well, you could do that,” said Laura, “but consider my counter offer.” She buried her hands further into Carmilla's hair, gently scratching her nails along the scalp.

“Nnngh,” groaned Carmilla, “can't… give in…”

Danny tapped her lip with a knuckle before grabbing Laura's computer chair and taking a seat at the end of the bed. In one smooth motion, she pinched the toe of Carmilla’s sock, pulling it off her foot in one smooth motion before she leaned in and began gently massaging it. “Allow me to sweeten the pot.”

The only response they got after that was what a noise that sounded oddly reminiscent of a purr.

“I think that translates to, ‘accepted, just keep doing that’.” Laura smiled smugly at Carmilla’s expression of contentment.

“Gladly,” said Danny, really pushing her thumbs into the sole of Carmilla’s foot, eliciting a contented sigh.

_ Knock knock knock. _

The girls looked at each other. People who actually knocked before coming in were few and far between.

“Come in?” said Laura hesitantly.

The door swung open, revealing Gus standing in the hall with a broad smile. “Hi girls!”

“Dad?!” said Laura as she scrambled off the bed, nearly dumping Carmilla onto the floor if not for the quick reaction of Danny grabbing hold of her, “what on earth are you doing here?”

“What? A father can’t come visit his favourite daughter?” he asked, hugging Laura close.

“Well, yeah. But some notice would’ve been nice,” said Laura.

“Sorry Laura, but I’m afraid you missed a line,” interrupted Danny. She grabbed a textbook from Laura’s desk and opened it, pretending to read the contents, “you’re supposed to say ‘I’m your only daughter’. So, once more from the top.”

Gus and Laura simply stared at her.

“And action!” coaxed Danny.

“Soooo… yeah. What’s up?” said Laura, turning back to her Dad. Behind her, Danny Pouted at being rebuffed.

“I thought it’d be nice to surprise you,” said Gus, “you said you didn’t have any plans this weekend when I called, so I thought I’d come spend some time with you.”

“Oh!” said Laura, forcing enthusiasm, “that sounds great.”

“Well, there goes that weekend,” said Danny under her breath.

“Oh it’s fine, we both like Gus,” Carmilla whispered back, “besides, you really want to tell Captain Bearspray that ‘no plans’ meant holing up with his daughter and enough supplies to last us til classes start on Monday.”

“No thank you. I like having eyes,” whispered Danny.

“What are you two discussing over there?” asked Gus.

“Oh, uh…” stuttered Danny, turning bright red, “we were…” 

“Discussing what we should do to get out of your way,” said Carmilla, “leave you two to spend some quality time together.”

“Oh, and here I thought you were quietly lamenting the loss of a weekend behind closed doors,” he said with a chuckle.

Carmilla joined Danny in the race for the best tomato impression.

“Dad!” exclaimed Laura, slapping his shoulder.

“What? I remember what it’s like to have free time with SO’s at your age.” He smirked and nudged Laura with his elbow. “Though, it’s certainly more fun to be on this side of this exchange. Your Grandma Rose used to howl at how red she could get me.”

Laura chuckled. “How are she and Grandpa Max?”

Gus’s expression softened. “They’re doing well… or at least that’s what your Uncle Nick tells me. They’re still…” He glanced at Carmilla. “...discomfited.”

“Ah,” said Laura sadly.

Carmilla visibly wilted as Danny wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close.

“They'll come around, Carmilla. They know what you did for Laura. Nick was the hard one,” said Gus, “but let’s not focus on that. In case you’re curious, Grandma and Grandpa Hollis send their love from Florida.”

Laura smiled a little. “Well, you can send mine back. How's Auntie Stacey?”

“Still at that dig in Greece, if you can believe it,” he said, “says the Mediterranean air suits her.”

“Knowing Auntie Stacey,” said Laura, “it's Mediterranean something else that probably suits her.” She wiggled her eyebrows at Carmilla and Danny so they could catch her meaning.

Gus laughed. “Very possibly, but if it makes her happy, power to her.”

“Hear hear,” interjected Danny, drawing Gus's attention.

“Now, I didn’t come here just to see Laura, but all of you,” he said.

“All of us?” Carmilla visibly gulped.

“Yes, all of you,” he repeated, “so no more excuses of giving us ‘quality time’. You're important to my little girl, so you're important to me.”

“Thank you, sir,” said Carmilla, who then shrank a little under his expectant gaze, “Gus.”

He smiled broadly. “So, what I was hoping is that we could have a look around campus?”

“Dad, you’ve seen campus before. We looked around when I was picking schools,” said Laura, “you were seriously concerned about someone poking their eye out on the gothic front gate.”

“I still say that thing has more pointy bits than it needs to,” he argued, “but I saw it on the campus tour. We didn’t see any of that neat stuff you’re always talking about in your videos.”

“Neat, terrifying,” commented Danny, “potato, po _ tah _ to really.”

“Said the werewolf,” he replied.

“Well… I suppose if we remain within the campus proper,” mused Laura, “the risk is fairly minimal. I mean, I wander around just fine.”

“Laura, you literally tied that spriggan into a knot when it tried to haul you into the forest last week,” said Carmilla.

“Ok, fair point,” said Laura, “but that proves my point. With the three of us, my dad will be perfectly safe.”

“Plus, I’m sure all the supernatural people around here are lovely. Met this nice giant on the way in, gave me directions, think his name was... Bob? That sounds right. Plus, bear spray,” said Gus, pulling what appeared to be a fire extinguisher out of his bag.

“I never thought your day of the week bag would look reasonable,” commented Danny to Laura.

Laura rolled her eyes before turning back to Gus. “Dad, leave the bear spray. I don’t want you to get surprised and mace the music faculty head.”

“Hey now, Ms. Kean looks very lively for a banshee,” protested Carmilla, “lovely singing voice actually.”

“We wouldn’t know that babe,” said Danny, “and probably shouldn’t find out, y’know what with a banshee’s voice being kinda lethal and all.”

“True, that wouldn’t be very good,” agreed Carmilla.

“Alright I’ll leave the bear spray,” said Gus, “now let’s go!”

With a little bit of bustle of jackets and shoes, the little group was soon suited up and on their way.

x-x-x

“See ya later Fred! Tell Shirley I said hi!” said Laura, waving after the Satyr as he jogged to catch up with the rest of his pack.

“I can’t believe he’s gonna propose,” said Carmilla, “they’ve only been dating a decade.”

“That long?” asked Gus, “seems overdue.”

“Not for satyrs, at least when they’re dating each other,” said Laura, “they live a long time, so the courtships are usually proportional.”

“Do they ever date humans?” asked Gus.

“Oh sure. Heck, Fred asked me out once,” said Laura, “I turned him down, obviously, but he was still quite the gentleman.”

“I thought you said he’d been dating his girlfriend for a decade,” said Gus.

Laura chuckled. “No, not that Fred. Other Fred, he’s a little shorter. Red beard and black hooves.”

Gus just stared at her, uncomprehending.

“Don’t worry about it,” said Carmilla, “one of the joys of silas.”

“Like the roving groups of mad scientists?” asked Gus, watching a group of alchemy students wander after random students with clipboards.

“Please,” said Laf, walking up from behind with Perry, “the alchemy nerds  _ wish _ they were mad scientists. I mean, they got the gear, but they just don’t have the right spirit.”

“Oh, so they were kidding about finding volunteers for testing,” said Gus.

“Nah, they were serious,” said Laf, “they just don’t do near enough research before moving to human testing. Completely unprofessional.”

“And you do?” asked Danny wryly.

“Of course I do,” said Laf, “I put in months of research before injecting myself with anything. Barely any aberrant symptoms.”

“I’m beginning to think I wasn’t quite adequately prepared for how weird this place is,” said Gus.

“Hey, you were prepared  _ at all _ ,” said Carmilla, “imagine what it’s like for new students after the squeaky clean campus tour, not that it’s quite so sanitized anymore. Now that this place is no longer Mother’s demon snack dish, they only chase off the dangerous critters rather than all of the weird.”

“Well, that’s comforting, but I need a break,” said Gus, “I could go for lunch. How’s the Caf here?”

Everyone shared glances before Perry spoke up. “Surprisingly good!”

“Surprising because it’s college food? Or because it’s made by minotaurs or something?” asked Gus.

“Because it’s college food that’s made with an unexpected amount of care,” said Perry, “no minotaurs are involved in the making of the food.”

“Just witches,” said Danny, “they’re fine, just don’t complain or ask what’s in the pie.”

“Why? What’s in the pie?” he asked.

“Dunno,” said Carmilla, “we’ve never asked.”

The group shared a collective chuckle as they approached the cafeteria. Before long, they were inside and seated, with servings of fresh bread and piping hot stew.

“So how are you liking Silas so far?” asked Lafontaine.

“Well, the food is a definite upside,” said Gus, “but I don’t know. The supernatural stuff is weird of course, but it still feels like an ordinary university.”

“Well, I’m not sure ordinary is the right word,” said Danny, “but I get what you mean.”

“Probably because we’re all used to it,” said Carmilla, “the supernatural loses some of it’s oddness if there is no one running screaming from it.”

“You might have something there,” said Gus with a laugh, “care to furnish some?”

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” said Carmilla, getting up as she rubbed her hands together.

“Carmilla, no,” said Danny, gently pulling Carmilla back into her seat.

“So what did you wanna see next? asked Laura.

“Well…” said Gus hesitantly, “I was kinda curious about… the lustig.”

Everyone else at the table paused, looking at him askance.

“Sorry,” said Gus, “that was insensitive of me. Forget I asked.”

“No Gus, it’s fine,” said Danny, “we actually go by there all the time. It’s fun to steal costumes from the parts of the theatre still standing.”

“What do you use theatre costumes f— y’know, I just realized what the answer probably is and I don’t want to hear it,” said Gus.

“No, nothing like that,” said Danny, “usually just messing around with Laura's videos.” Gus tried to keep a neutral expression, but his relief was still obvious.

I think a trip by the theatre is doable,” said Carmilla, “just… not the catacombs. They’re not exactly stable and those aren’t good memories down there anyway.

Everyone nodded in agreement except for Danny, who smiled, taking Carmilla’s hand. “Well, I got one good memory outta that place, even if I didn’t realize it at the time.”

Carmilla shared the smile as she squeezed Danny’s hand.

“Alright, let’s go have a look see,” said Laura, wiping her mouth as she got up, “might be good to face it, chase some ghosts away.”

“Hey!” came a protest from a nearby table.

“Not you, Rose,” said Laura, laughing at her grin, “metaphorical ghosts.”

“Oh, well then, proceed,” she said with a laugh.

The group walked back out into the sunshine, the first hints of spring on the breeze of an otherwise brisk winter’s day. They chatted idly until they found themselves in the shadow if the Lustig, half collapsed and sunk into a depression above where the desecrated pit had crumbled in on itself with the beast’s death throes.

“Looks like it used to be quite the building,” said Gus, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, apparently everytime something tried to burn the place down, Mother added some ridiculous structure wherever the damage had been,” said Carmilla, “that woman had an obsession with the dramatic.”

“Made for an awful theatre though,” said Danny, “dead sound and no sight lines from all the carved pillars, not that there was anything really worth going to. I don’t think anyone other than the theatre kids were heartbroken when ‘Antigone’ was put on permanent hold.”

“And no one’s tried to rebuild?”

“No, the place is too unstable,” said Danny, “you’re fine walking around but heavy machinery would crash right down into the catacombs. Plus, I don’t think anyone’s in a hurry to go back down there.”

“Plus again, if they did, where would we get such great costumes,” said Laf, whom at some point had acquired what appeared to be a Technicolor Dreamcoat.

“Lafontaine! What have I said about going in there?” scolded Perry.

“Get you something too? they answered, holding up a ringmaster’s coat.

Perry looked delighted at the red coat before she schooled her features once more. “No, that it could collapse on you when you go in there.”

“Collapse?” asked Gus, eyeing the structure warily, “and you go in there too, young lady?”

“Not yet,” said Laura, looking up at the ruin, “I sometimes come with Danny or Carm here, but I still remember losing Carm when I’m here. Stupid when I got her back, but the feelings return regardless.

“Well,” said Gus, looking like he was about to start a lecture, “it might be time to go in.”

“What? Into the decrepit structure of death?” Laura asked, “who are you and what have you done with my father?”

“I’m serious,” said Gus, “I know I kept you too close and sheltered. How did that old roommate of yours put it? Hamster ball?”

“That sounds like Betty,” said Laura.

“But you can absolutely take care of yourself and I think we both need more experience in taking a risk and having some fun.” He held out his hand to her.

She took his outstretched hand. “I think that sounds awesome.”

x-x-x

The sun was getting low as they got back to Gus’s truck in the parking lot.

“Alright, I’ll meet you up at the lodge tomorrow morning for breakfast,” said Gus, wearing a bishop’s hat, “you sure your sisters won’t mind?”

“Eh, Mel may raise a fuss and keep you from the coffee,” said Danny, who’d donned a Rat Pack fedora “but the rest of the girls are pretty good about family. Just don’t let Elsie talk you into anything.”

“How far is your hotel?” asked Laura, adjusting the stolen cloak about her shoulders.

“Back in town,” said Gus, “about forty-five minutes.”

“And safely outside the Silas gets weird at night radius,” Carmilla said quietly, prompting a subtle nod from Laura.

“Well, drive safe and we’ll see you in the morning,” said Danny.

“Have a good night, girls,” he said, hugging Laura before getting into his truck and driving off.

“Huh, that pickup is getting a bit old. I wonder why he doesn’t get a new one?” said Danny.

“He loves that truck,” said Laura, “I doubt he’ll ever part with it.”

“Eh, give it a few years,” said Danny, “it’ll run out its welcome eventually.”

“We’ll see,” said Laura.

“Hey, as much fun as discussing automotives is,” said Carmilla, “I think we had some interrupted plans to catch up on.”

“Ooh, I think you’re right,” said Danny, “Laura?”

“Considering that our time is somewhat shortened, we might have to condense our plans a little,” Laura said.

“Meaning?” Carmilla asked.

“Race you!” Laura bolted towards the dorm.

Carmilla and Danny smiled at each other before chasing in hot pursuit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been a while since I did a Silas chapter. I love the weird as mundane stuff you can play with and then introducing Gus to it seemed like a no brainer.
> 
> Just a reminder for everyone, Grandpa Max and Grandma Rose are the parents and Nick is the brother of Terry, Laura's mother, who'd been killed by the Dean for poking her nose into the last cycle of missing girls. It's covered in Hollis Family Dynamics.
> 
> Have a good week all!


	92. The Spice of Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finding out what you like is a matter of trial and error.

“Okay, which one of you had the Italian?” asked Laura, pulling a wrapped sandwich out of the bag she'd opened on the table.

“That's would be me, Creampuff,” said Carmilla, placing it onto her plate.

“Careful or you’ll drown,” teased Danny.

“I don't put  _ that _ much dressing on it, thank you,” said Carmilla, “plus, people who eat glass mustard shouldn't throw stones.”

“Glass mustard,” said Laura, “now that sounds thoroughly unpleasant.”

“All that mustard flavour you love, now with lacerations,” said Danny, pitching her voice like an announcer.

“Speaking of, one rare roast beef sandwich with extra mustard and peppers,” said Laura, placing it on the plate near Danny, who licked her lips in anticipation.

“One kids ham and cheese and one kids tuna.” Laura placed the filled kaiser rolls in front of Charlie and Drix who fell upon them immediately. “And of course, meatball with parmesan and extra marinara.” Laura put on a manically gleeful grin as she dropped a monster of a sandwich onto the plate in front of her, shaking the table.

“We’re gonna have to carry you to bed, aren’t we?” said Danny.

“Don’t see why this would be any different than the last time,” said Laura, as she delicately unwrapped her sandwich and leaned in for a generous whiff of the steamy aromas.

“Y’know,” said Carmilla, unwrapping her own sandwich with less pomp and circumstance, “you’re not obligated to finish the entire thing in one sitting.”

“You see, that’s where you’re wrong,” said Laura, hefting the hoagie, “the moment I ordered I entered into an agreement… no, a  _ covenant!... _ to consume this sandwich and enjoy it as it was meant to be enjoyed. Piping hot and fresh! Not cold and soggy after a night in the refrigerator, shoving it into the microwave to try and futilely restore some semblance of its former glory. No, the deed must be done here, tonight. For all to bear witness to the glory!” Laura opened her mouth as wide as possible and dove into the sandwich, teeth first

Carmilla blinked slowly at Laura before turning to Danny. “We sure that this house wasn’t built on the ruins of an ancient haunted castle or some such?”

“A haunted cabin at best,” said Danny, picking up her own sandwich as bright red and yellow banana peppers slipped out and onto the plate.

“Candy,” said Mercy, sitting in her high chair at Danny’s side.

“No, sweetie. It’s not time for candy,” said Danny, setting her sandwich down to softly stroke the toddler’s head, “it’s dinner time. Eat your carrots.” Danny picked up the small plastic spoon and put it in Mercy’s hand before guiding it to scoop up a spoonful of the steamed carrots.

With her eyes on her mother, Mercy brought the spoon to her mouth and got most of the carrots in and chewed the vegetables with her mouth open. She dropped the spoon back on the tray before leaning forward towards Danny’s plate. “Candy.”

“There’s no candy here, Mercy,” said Danny.

“I think she means the peppers,” said Carmilla, following Mercy’s eyeline.

“Mmm-hmmm,” agreed Laura as much as she could around her sandwich.

Danny looked at them incredulously before plucking one of the almost-neon yellow rings off the plate and holding it aloft. Much to her amazement, Mercy’s gaze followed and she leaned even further, arms outstretched towards the small pickled vegetable.

“Candy,” Mercy repeated again.

“Not candy,” said Danny, raising her hand a little more prominently, “pepper.” 

Mercy stared intently before repeating, “pepper.”

“Very good, Mercy!” said Carmilla, “that’s a banana pepper.”

Mercy perked up at the word ‘banana’ and resumed her leaning and grabby hands. “Pepper!”

“Wh’ t’b f’r…”

“Swallow Cupcake,” said Carmilla.

Laura glowered at Carmilla with slightly puffed cheeks before doing as she was told. “Ahem… well, to be fair, making it sound like it might be banana flavoured probably doesn't help our case and the colour of those things does look rather sugary.”

“That’s fair and probably no healthier,” said Danny before turning back to Mercy who’d affected puppy-dog eyes —non-literal for the moment, “sweetie, this isn’t candy. It’s spicy, it hurts.”

Mercy looked at her blankly.

“Do you want to try the banana pepper?” asked Danny.

“No,” said Mercy, who was still looking at the pepper with yearning eyes.

“Do you want to try it?”

“No,” Mercy repeated.

“Ok,” said Danny putting the pepper down and picking her sandwich back up.

“Pepper,” said Mercy, much more pathetically.

With a sigh, Danny put her sandwich down. “Carm?”

“Yes, Babe?”

“Can you please go get a sippy cup and fill it with milk?” Danny picked up the loose pepper again and regarded it as Carmilla got up. She looked to Laura for some sign of dissuasion, which she didn’t find as Laura was instead getting out her phone and setting it to record. Danny rolled her eyes. “We're such good parents.”

“Pepper,” Mercy repeated once more.

“Alright,” said Danny, holding the pepper towards Mercy who tilted her mouth up to try and bite it, “smell it first.”

Mercy took the barest of sniffs before tilting her mouth up once more.

Biting her lip, Danny brought the barest edge of the pepper to Mercy’s mouth, letting her bite down on the edge. As she pulled the pepper away, she watched Mercy carefully as she chewed the tiny bite. Confusion crossed her face before finally she froze, letting her mouth hang open.

“Help,” said Mercy softly as she looking yearningly at Danny.

Danny covered her mouth to cover the laugh that was threatening to bubble up. “Oh sweetie…” She glanced over at Laura who was also holding in a laugh.

“Help is on the way,” said Carmilla, swooping in, sippy cup in hand, “drink this sweetheart, it’ll help.”

Mercy grabbed the cup with both hands and stuck the spout into her mouth, drinking greedily.

“Careful sweetie,” said Carmilla, tilting the cup away from Mercy.

“Feel better?” asked Danny.

Mercy’s expression was still distressed, but she nodded.

“Alright sweetie, just eat your carrots,” said Danny, “they aren’t spicy.”

Clumsily, Mercy picked her spoon back up and inexpertly shovelled another spoonful of carrots into her mouth.

“There ya go,” said Danny as she finally got to take a bite of her own sandwich, enjoying the bite of the peppers amongst the other flavours.

“Huh, new parenting method,” said Laura, “eat your vegetables or the spicy thing.”

“Could work,” said Danny, “but not for us.” She grabbed two more peppers and tossed them over to Charlie and Drix who each happily popped the spicy slices into their mouths.

“Ah, right. Well, no matter. Onwards to glory!” said Laura, before taking another huge bite.

“Speaking of actions that will be regretted sooner rather than later,” commented Carmilla.

Danny joked as she took another bite of her sub, right before a small voice same from right beside her.

“Pepper?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini chapter for you all today! This chapter is directly inspired by the most adorable little video of a little girl trying wasabi. Check it out of you haven't seen it[ here.](http://cheezwhiz-cupcake.tumblr.com/post/171680311803/catsbeaversandducks-help-via-instasurreal)


	93. Running Amok

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who wants to get up early on a weekend for exercise?

**"** Wake up, lazy butt!”

Aaron flopped down onto the nondescript lump in the blankets, eliciting a familiar groan from somewhere within the maze of cloth.

“Come on!” said Aaron brightly, “it's time to meet the day with a rejuvenating run!”

“Mmph,” was the only response he got from the bed’s denizen.

“Come on, sleepy head. You may as well just get up now,” he coaxed, “you know I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of how annoying I can be.”

“Rrrrrrr…”

“Alright, you leave me no choice…” Aaron turned around and pulled back the duvet, exposing a pair of bare feet. The owner of said feet tried in vain to pull them to safety, struggling against Aaron's weight.

“Let's see… this little piggy went to market…” he said, gently grabbing the big toe.

“Mmph…”

“This little piggy stayed home, this little piggy had roast beef,” Aaron paused, “which is kinda messed up when you think about it, but better than spare ribs… where was I? Oh yeah, and this little piggy had none. And  _ this  _ little piggy cried—” 

Instead of finishing the rhyme, he started to tickle the sole of the foot.

“Ack!” came a voice from behind him.

Before he could react, he felt them sit up before a pair of arms roughly hugged him from behind and dragged him back, away from the little piggies.

“Aaron, you are my best friend and I love you,” said Charlie in his ear, “but you are  _ so _ dead.”

He tested his movement against the bear hug, feeling like he was caught in the world's comfiest vice. “Hey, you're the one who agreed to a morning run.”

She let one arm go to grab her phone from the nightstand. “Seven-thirty barely qualifies as morning, especially on a Saturday.”

“You're the one who agreed to it,” said Aaron, “not to mention it was supposed to be seven o'clock. We just decided to take pity and give you the extra half hour.”

“Ugh, if this is pity, I'd hate to think what you consider to be torture,” complained Charlie, “you should’ve gotten Hazel to come wake me up. She woulda been a lot nicer about it.”

“Yes, and I’m sure I wouldn’t have been waiting for several hours for your preferred method of ‘waking up’,” teased Aaron.

Charlie kept silent, immensely glad Aaron couldn’t see the blush that was heating her cheeks.

“Exactly, now let’s go,” said Aaron, wiggling against Charlie’s terrifyingly strong grip.

“Or… now go with me on this… I roll over and just go back to sleep and simply cuddle you so you don’t get any more ideas about waking me.” Charlie rolled onto her side, taking Aaron along with to illustrate her point.

“Well, if that’s what you’d prefer, who am I to stand in the way?” said Aaron, “let me help with a soothing lullaby.”

Charlie’s hackles immediately went up. “Lullaby?”

“Of course!” Aaron cleared his throat. “Mahna Mahna!  _ Doo doooo doo-doo-doo!  _ Mahna Mahna!  _ Doo doo-doo d—”  _ Aaron smiled into the hand clamped over his mouth.

“Alright, you win, I’m getting up.” Charlie unceremoniously shoved Aaron onto Hazel’s side of the bed before getting up and walking into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

Gleefully, Aaron sprang up from the bed and out into the apartment where Hazel was lounging on the couch.

“Was that really necessary?” she asked, “I mean, she doesn’t really need this. Her TKD classes keep her in shape. Toned… fight ready… shape…” She stared off into space for a moment before she sheepishly snarled her focus back to Aaron. “Sorry, what were we talking about?”

“You were bequeathing your wide screen TV to me,” said Aaron, “it’s such a generous offer, how can I possibly refuse?”

“Easily, if you know what’s good for you,” said Charlie from the door, already in her workout gear.

“Umm… are the sparring gloves really necessary?” asked Aaron.

“Hey, you asked me to come along to motivate you,” said Charlie, holding up her hand. The worn leather creaked just slightly as she opened and closed her fist, “you simply failed to specify  _ how _ I could go about that.” She pounded her fist into her palm, grinning fiercely at Aaron.

“I regret my decisions all of a sudden,” said Aaron.

“Do you now?” Charlie feigned surprise. “What a pity. What. A. Pity.”

He turned to Hazel. “You gonna put up with this treatment?”

“No, but I don't have to.” Hazel smiled sweetly at him.

“She and I have worked out… other motivations for today,” said Charlie, wiggling her eyebrows lasciviously, “she works better the carrot rather than the stick.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. “It's always about sex with you two, isn't it?”

Hazel mimed writing a letter. “Dear kettle, there's something about your current hue I just can't quite put my finger on. Love, Pot.”

Aaron snorted. “Fair, but still, why do I get the stick? Some words of encouragement would do just fine.”

“Well, you know what they say,” said Charlie, “spare the rod, spoil the child.”

“I am not a child.” Aaron pouted.

Hazel held up her phone. “I have video of you gleefully tearing apart a kitchen store that says otherwise.”

“I swear, I'm going to have him stuffed and mounted for sharing that,” said Aaron.

“Ooh, get him posed like he’s pouncing.” Hazel held her hands up like claws, “a textbook example of  _ Panthera Husbandus Ignoramus _ .”

“Tempting, but I’m leaning towards adding a top hat and cane and having him frozen mid-dance,” said Aaron, “ _ Panthera Husbandus Cartoonus. _ ”

“Y’know, if you’re trying to endear yourself to me,” said Charlie, “discussing turning my brother into a taxidermy project is not quite how I’d go about it.”

“C’mon, it’ll be educational,” said Hazel.

“No, she’s right,” said Aaron, “he’d get boring really quickly. Besides, then I’d have to dust him. Right now he’s self-cleaning.”

“Yes, that was totally my point,” said Charlie flatly before stepping up and dragging Aaron to his feet, “now, it’s time to get this show on the road. You two wanted this run, now mush!” She gently shoved him towards his sneakers.

“Point of order,” said Hazel, “we’re doing this because we’re  _ not _ canines who run all the time.”

Charlie crossed her arms. “Babe, that reward distance we were talking about is crawling upwards.”

Hazel jumped up off the couch and hurriedly went to the door to put her shoes on. 

x-x-x

Aaron wheezed as he leaned over on a park bench. “Al… right… we’re… doing… great…” He took a couple more deep breaths before looking over at Hazel. “What was that? Two miles? Three, maybe?”

Hazel, who was doubled over as she sat on the bench, pulled out her phone. “According to the GPS… nine-hundred yards.”

Aaron gawked. “Half a mile? That’s it?”

“That’s it.” Hazel held up her phone, showing a rather short, meandering line on the tracker.

Charlie smirked at them both. “Really guys? You know where we are, we come here all the time. The ice cream store is right there,” she said, pointing at the cheery building facade in the distance.

“Ah good,” said Aaron, “the perfect place to admit defeat and indulge in a little bad habitry.” He started to walk off but was halted by a vice grip on his arm.

“Hold your horses,” said Charlie, “we aren’t done yet. Come on, you guys wanted this run.”

“The assertion to get in shape is losing its lustre now that I’m realizing just how badly out of shape I am,” said Hazel, standing up again, “but you have a point.”

“But... ice cream…” Aaron gave Charlie the saddest puppy dog eyes he could muster.

“You’ll have to do a lot better than that,” said Charlie, “I grew up with someone who could be a literal puppy. However…”

Aaron perked up.

“Once we finish”—Aaron pouted again—”we can go for a treat,” said Charlie.

Aaron considered it before he nodded in agreement and steeled himself. “Alright, I can do this.”

“Same here,” said Hazel, “so how far? Five miles? Ten?”

“Um, no. Just another half mile,” said Charlie.

“Wait, seriously?” asked Aaron, “why not further?”

Charlie glare could have melted steel.

“Aside from the slow descent into madness brought on by our incessant whining,” he added sheepishly.

Charlie rolled her eyes. “I might be in shape, but I’m not a runner. I can only go so far myself before I start cramping.”

“I actually wondered about that,” said Hazel, “well, I appreciate you coming to keep us honest… and wrangled, anyways.” She leaned in and kissed her wife on the cheek.

“Well, you asked so nicely,” said Charlie, “now, let’s get moving before we stiffen up.”

With a smile, Hazel started off as did Aaron, once he’d been sufficiently tugged along by Charlie.

x-x-x

“This isn’t ice cream,” Aaron crossed his arms and slouched in the diner booth.

“It’s nine-thirty in the morning,” said Hazel, “it’s too early for ice cream. The ice cream shop isn’t open yet, because even the people who dedicate their lives to ice cream know  _ it’s too early for ice cream. _ ”

“Besides, I never said ice cream, I said a treat,” said Charlie, “specifically  _ your _ treat. I think I’ll get a double stack of pancakes this morning. I’ve worked up an appetite after all.”

“We actually do have ice cream if you’d really like some,” said their server.

Aaron perked up before tempering his enthusiasm. “Y’know what, I’m alright. It was more about the whining than the ice cream. It’s no fun if I can just get what I want. I’ll get the waffles with blueberries and if you could just take the cutlery away from the young woman closest to you currently staring at me with murderous intent, I’d really appreciate it.”

The server smiled sadly. “Sorry, we have a no-comeuppance-intervention policy. Workplace safety rule,” he said.

“Fair enough, just the waffles then.”

“I’ll have the eggs benny please,” said Hazel, handing off her menu before subtly sliding away Charlie’s silverware.

“Alright, I’ll have your stuff out in a few minutes,” said their server, making his way towards the kitchen. 

“So this was an enjoya— an enter—” Aaron paused in thought. “This was a morning,” he said finally, “so, same time next week?”

“Not if you don’t want to feel like a claymation figure every sunday,” said Charlie, “every couple days at least. It’ll get easier pretty quickly if you keep at it. Then, next saturday, you are letting me sleep until nine and you keep your trap shut or else you can coax your husband to run with you.”

“Aw, but exercising with Drix is so annoying,” said Aaron, “he does nothing but complain.”

Hazel moved the silverware further out of reach.

Charlie and Aaron stared at each other for several long second before they both broke out laughing.

Aaron wiped his eyes. “Yeah, no, I get it. It’s a deal. I’ll keep it more civil next time and I’ll be a bit more ready. You can be more ‘running buddy’ than ‘drill sergeant’.”

“Can’t I be both?” asked Charlie.

“Talk to your wife,” he joked.

“Well, if we’re being completely honest…” said Hazel.

“Which we’re not,” Charlie said hastily, looking meaningfully at Hazel, “so let’s just drop it.”

Hazel just smirked and sipped her coffee.

Charlie glowered at her before sticking out her hand. “Truce?”

“Truce,” said Aaron, taking the handshake.

“Aha! You fool, you’ve fallen into my trap!” declared Charlie, jumping out of the booth and yanking Aaron into a headlock.

Hazel signaled to the server for more coffee. This was obviously still going to take a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This actually started as Aaron waking up Drix, but I realized that I could have more fun if I made it Charlie and just had them torment each other throughout the chapter. 
> 
> And in case their juvenile behaviour makes it hard to tell, yes, these people are married and in their twenties... And rough-housing in public.


	94. Fair Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Journalists have many interesting responsibilities. Some of them just happen to be a bit more fun than others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a follow-up to chapter 63: Deked Out.

“What do you think?” asked Danny, holding up a purple dress in front of her.

“It looks great… for your party of lies,” accused Charlie, though the sparkle of mischief in her eyes pulled any possible sting out of the rebuke, “maybe I should come too, invite my ‘fiancé’.”

“I swear, there is an actual gala this time,” said Danny, walking towards the fitting rooms, a rainbow of outfits draped over her arm, “the ball is in your court anyhow. It's Laf and Carm who have to be on their guard.”

“That's just what they'd like and then BAM! They land a two-fer,” said Charlie, looking around suspiciously.

“Isn't that against the rules?” asked Danny.

“Rules?” Charlie smirked at her mother.

Danny rolled her eyes. “Right, how silly of me.” She found an unoccupied room and locked the door behind her.

Charlie took a seat on a bench in the hallway and took out her phone, fiddling with it to pass the time.

“Charlie? What do you think?” asked Laura, stepping out of a room further up the hall. She was dressed in an ankle length, sleeveless black outfit.

“Wow, Mom. That's a really nice dress,” said Charlie, letting the snark drop for the moment.

“Yes, I suppose it is a really nice— Haha!” exclaimed Laura, jumping into a wide stance so the separate legs of the jumpsuit could be seen, “you were fooled, it was pants all along!” She bounced in places bringing her legs together and apart.

Charlie blinked at her mother before going back to her phone.

“Everyone's a critic,” grumbled Laura.

“Laura? You out there?” called Danny.

“Yep!”

The door to Danny’s dressing room opened and she stepped out in the off-the-shoulder purple gown she’d just grabbed. “What do you think?” She slowly twirled, taking another moment to look at herself in the mirror.

“Hagh-gub-da…” Laura cleared her throat. “...buh.”

“I think that roughly translates to ‘it looks good, buy it’,” said Charlie, snapping a photo of Danny, “and for the record, I agree.”

Charlie’s phone pinged.

“Oh! And so does Mama, apparently,” she added, “also, one of you uses the drool emote like that again when messaging me, and I’m moving out.”

“Noted,” said Danny, “and you look pretty good yourself, Babe.”

“Thanks,” said Laura, “though I think I’m gonna go for an actual suit. This jumpsuit is fun, but I’m not feeling it for the gala. Besides, if any one of us is gonna be wearing straight black, it’s the one who could weaponize the LBD if she set her mind to it.”

“I don’t think anyone in this family wears straight anything,” joked Charlie, prompting snorts of laughter from both her mothers.

“Laura, why don't you buy that anyways?” suggested Danny, “you or Carm could wear it for a night out.”

Laura smiled at the thought. “I like it. Alright, sold! Let's pack these up and we'll be on our way.”

“But, I still have five things to try on…” said Danny as Laura's phone buzzed.

“No, Danny. You don't.” Laura held up her phone.

Danny's eyes bugged out at the obscene message from Carmilla. “Or maybe I'll stick with this one.” She retreated back into the dressing room, face as red as her hair.”

“I don't want to know what that said, do I?”

Laura smirked as she turned back to her own dressing room. “No Charlie. You don't.”

x-x-x

“This is a little more muted than I was expecting,” said Carmilla as she stepped out of the car the newspaper had been kind enough to hire for them.

“My thoughts exactly,” said Laura, tugging at Carmilla's stole where it had slipped off her shoulder.

Carmilla smirked at Laura. “I meant the venue, Cupcake. I kinda expected more of a to do.”

“Ah, yes. I suppose it is, but this is just a meet and greet for the press and chamber of commerce,” said Laura, “overdoing it would be a waste, like serving filet mignon to a school of sharks. Sure, they might like it at the time, but they're still coming after you if they smell blood in the water.”

“Besides, it’s a civic event,” commented Danny, “the mayor isn’t going to have as much cash to throw around as a senator or the governor.”

“Oh yeah,” said Carmilla, “that was a fun one. What do you suppose the chances of getting invited to one of those shindigs again are?”

Laura chuckled. “Well, considering I used that party to get enough info to expose a tax embezzlement scheme and get the governor laughed out of office… pretty slim.”

“So what you’re saying is pretty much is enjoy this before the mayor forgets her gratitude for taking her opponent’s legs out from under him,” said Carmilla.

“That about sums it up, yeah,” said Laura, handing her invitation to the man at the door, who opened it with a smile. The trio walked into a small foyer where a handful of other guests milled about, checking coats and talking on phones. Music could be heard from an open set of double doors on the far side of the room. 

“Is Frank going to be here?” asked Carmilla, pulling the stole down to thread around her back, exposing the open back of the dress.

“Yes. Reports of his injury were greatly exaggerated. One might even say, fabricated,” said Laura.

“Fabricated? Why I am shocked and appalled,” said Carmilla, her face an unconvincing caricature of disappointment, “how could you ever let your journalistic integrity be compromised?”

“Well, it was apparently for a very good cause and I was given some very good motivation to play along besides.” Laura ran her fingers over the bare skin between Carmilla’s shoulder blades, delighting in the goosebumps that raised in their wake as she settled her hand onto Carmilla’s hip

“Okay, reel it in you two,” said Danny, “we still have a night of schmoozing to get through before we can retreat to our hotel room.”

“I wouldn’t so much call it schmoozing. More polite introductions with just a hint of buttering up,” interrupted Frank, coming up behind them with Michelle, his wife.

“Frank, that is almost the textbook definition of schmoozing,” countered Laura.

“Hardly, this is rubbing elbows at worst,” he said.

“Actually, as long as we’re standing out here, this isn’t rubbing elbows at all,” noted Danny.

“Fair point,” said Frank, “well Hollis, might as well get in there.”

“Hey wait,” squawked Laura, “why do I have to go first?”

“Because one, you three will make one hell of an entrance, and two, I’m your boss and I said so.”

“Huh, right on both points,” said Carmilla, “this guy’s good.”

“Alright, you win this round Grimsdottir,” said Laura, hooking her free arm around Danny’s waist, “you two ready to terrify some politicians?”

“I was born ready,” said Danny.

“And I died ready,” added Carmilla.

“Not quite sure if that works, but I’ll take it,” said Laura, leading them into the ballroom.

She had to admit, there was something satisfying about all the eyes that turned to look.

“Ms. Hollis! Welcome!”

“Mayor Buchanan,” replied Laura warmly, temporarily letting go of Carmilla to shake the mayor’s hand, “so nice to see you. Let me introduce you to my wives, this is Carmilla and this is Danny.”

“A pleasure,” said the mayor, shaking each of their hand without really paying them much attention, “I’m so pleased you could make it. It’s really important to me to personally connect with local members of the press.”

Danny and Carmilla shared a glance. There was a pre-rehearsed soundbite if they’d ever heard one, though if Laura noticed, she gave no outward sign.

“I’m glad to hear it,” said Laura pleasantly, returning her arm to Carmilla’s waist, “I’m looking forward to a close relationship. I’m ready to give this new council the attention it deserves.”

“Splendid,” replied Buchanan, flashing a politician’s smile “well, the night is short and I have to make the rounds. Enjoy the gala.” She nodded at them before turning to greet Frank.

Laura suppressed a snicker as they made their way to a table along the wall, snagging flutes of sparkling wine from a passing server.

“What?” asked Danny.

“Well, don’t think I’m gonna get invited to another mayoral ball anytime soon,” said Laura with a smug grin, “at least not while she’s in office.”

“Wait, what?” asked Carmilla, “did I miss something?”

“Probably, political double-speak is an annoying skill,” said Laura, “be thankful you don’t know it.”

“So what did we miss?” asked Danny.

“You missed her going for the throat, that’s what,” said Frank as he walked up to the table, “jeez, I’ve never seen such a cold stare. Maybe I should have gone first” He glanced over to where the mayor was making her rounds.

Carmilla and Danny looked between Laura and her boss for some sort of explanation.

Laura took a sip and smiled at them. “I think she was hoping that my riposte of her former rival meant that she could use me as a mouthpiece,” she explained, “and I basically told her that she’s getting no special treatment. Good or bad, it’s going on the page.”

Frank rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “We could’ve played nice for a little while. Maybe lulled her into a false sense of security? We could’ve landed the first big scandal headline easy.”

“Now Frank, where would be the fun in that?” asked Laura.

He laughed. “Nowhere! Of course. So how do we go about poking at the cracks?”

Laura scanned the room. “Well, I’d say you should go  _ schmooze _ it up with our local Rotary president as the mayor appears to have taken quite a shine to him. Meanwhile, I think it’s time for me to meet our new councilman.”

“Please go easy, we still need him to actually help run the town,” said Frank.

“No guarantees, but I’ll keep it in mind,” said Laura, as he walked away before turning back to Danny and Carmilla “you two want to come along, or would you rather wait here?”

“Hmm… stand around drinking knock-off champagne and being bored or have a front row seat to my beautiful wife psychologically deconstructing self-important egotists. What to do.”

“I’d call that fairly definitive,” said Danny, offering her arm to Laura, “I think this’ll be fun.”

“Oh I know it’ll be fun,” said Laura, resting a hand in Danny’s elbow. She scanned the room until her gaze landed on the rookie politician in question. With a smirk and a nod, she hooked Carmilla’s arm. “And now the game truly begins.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been meaning to write this ball for a while now. Seemed like such an innocent plot thread, just hanging there all alone. [insert Sarah McLachlan ballad here]
> 
> For anyone curious, in my head, Danny's dress is the same one worn by Nicole Haught in Wynonna Earp at the end of season 1. Carmilla's is kind of a haltertop version of Natasha's dress from her CSA win last year. Laura is in a more formal version of her classic blazer outfit. 
> 
> Hope you guys liked this one!


	95. Purple Prose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laf's Easter decorating plans hit a snag.

**"** Come on, come on…”

“Laf, sweetie? I'm home.”

Laf jumped, bumping the contraption they had set up. Realizing their mistake, their hands flew to the controls, but the damage had been done. 

“Per—” was all they managed to get out before their set up burst with a wet squelch.

“LaFontaine!” yelped Perry, leaping to her spouse's side.

LaFontaine was standing rigid with shock, their entire face and front covered in bright purple goo.

Perry didn't even hesitate as she grabbed the clean back of their lab coat and hauled them over to the chemical shower in the corner, yanking the handle even as she was still dragging them over the drain.

“Gah!” they yelped as the cold water cascaded over them, beginning to wash away the thick sludge. “Pe—” They got out before some of the goo washed into their mouth and they began to spit and cough out of reflex.

While LaFontaine was busy sputtering, Perry pulled on a set of gloves before diving in, setting about unbuttoning their lab coat. She focused intently on getting the chemical soaked coat away from her partner, not even noticing as the water soaked the sleeves of her sweater.

“Perr,” they finally got out as they peeled their opaqued goggles off.

She ignored them, spinning them around to drag their coat off of them. Hucking it into a bin, she turned them back around to begin unfastening their belt.

“Perry,” Laf said, setting their hands over hers. 

She snapped out of her focus, meeting their eyes. 

“I'm alright, this stuff isn't dangerous,” they said through chattering teeth. They had to suppress the urge to place a hand on her cheek. There was enough of this gunk spread around as is. “But thank you for leaping in. You don't know how much I love you knowing what to do for a chemical spill.” They reached up and shut off the shower, wiping water out of their eyes with their bare arm.

“It's a bit of a necessity, loving you,” she teased.

“I won't debate that,” Laf agreed, “but there are much better contexts for having you peeling my clothes off.”

Perry blushed lightly and gave them a small smile. “Well, the girls are over playing and we still need to clean you up with a proper hot shower.” She took their hands in hers and began walking backwards towards the basement bathroom. “Birds and scones and all that lovely nonsense.”

“Well, I suppose I could use a little help in being thorough,” they said as they allowed themself to be led into the bathroom and kicked the door closed behind them.

x-x-x

Carmilla had collapsed.

Her wives admonished her for laughing, or rather they would have had they not been trying so hard, and mostly failing, to not laugh themselves.

Perry was not amused. “I can't believe you three! This isn't funny.”

Danny tried her hardest to compose herself. However, the moment she looked behind Perry, a high pitched squeak of laughter forced it's way past her lips and she had to slap a hand across her face to keep any semblance of control.

“Perr, it's alright,” said LaFontaine, resting a hand on her shoulder, “it's actually really funny. I'm our very own Violet Beauregarde.” They ran a hand over their face, the natural skin tone of their hand contrasting harshly against their now vibrant purple complexion.

“Sweetie, you were in a lab accident. You could've been hurt,” said Perry.

“I think ‘accident’ implies that this wasn't caused by my own idiocy,” they said, pointing at their countenance, “and I already told you, it wasn't dangerous. Ironically, if it had been, I'd be fine because I woulda had more safety measures in place.”

“At least we don't have to run you through a juicer,” said Laura through her giggles, drawing Perry's glare.

“So how did you end up turning yourself into a Roald Dahl cosplayer?” asked Danny as she dragged Carmilla back up from the floor.

“I was trying to make Easter eggs,” said Laf.

Laura looked at them askance. “Far be it for me to tell you how to do things, but we just use food colouring and vinegar.” She mimed dipping an egg into dye.

Laf lit up. “Oh, there is something to be said for the classics. Can't really try it my way with the kids. Besides, that's Perry's thing.”

Perry grinned and jogged into the kitchen, coming back with a handful of dyed eggs with brightly coloured speckles. “We flicked raw food colouring off a paint brush to get the spatter.”

Laura picked up one of Perry's eggs between her fingers, tilting it to catch the light before meeting Laf's eyes again. “Sooooo…”

“Well, I got to thinking. We can colour the shells of eggs, why not the insides as well?” said Laf.

“So instead of an egg white, you have an egg red? Or an egg blue?” asked Laura gleefully.

Danny put a hand over her face. “Laura, that actually hurt.”

“Actually, she's not far wrong,” said Laf.

“You're kidding,” said Carmilla, furiously dabbing at her face with a tissue, trying to clean up the streaks her tears of laughter had left in her makeup.

“Nope,” said Laf, “if I figure it out, then the entire raw egg, yolk and all, will be dyed whichever colour you pick.”

“Ok… why?” asked Danny.

“Well, think about it. The biggest disappointment about Easter is that moment when you have to use the eggs before they spoil and they're just ordinary eggs,” said Laf, “even if you’ve dyed them yourself, they lose some of the magic in that moment. But what if that moment never happened? You wake up Easter morning, you grab a blue and a green egg, crack them into the pan and make yourself blue and green fried eggs.”

Laura's eyes went wide and her hand flew out, gripping onto Carmilla's arm. “Oh my god, think of it!”

“I am cupcake,” said Carmilla, “seems like something the kids would enjoy Easter morning.”

“No, no. Beyond that, for the summer. We could eat, not just fried eggs…” Laura paused for effect. “...but  _ Pride _ eggs.”

Carmilla regarded Laura for another moment before turning back to the group. “Okay, that's actually pretty good.”

“It is,” agreed LaFontaine, “but I wouldn't go making breakfast plans just yet; I think I'm a while off on doing it in the shell. Though Perr found me a recipe for the next best thing!” They scrambled over to the fridge and pulled out a plate of brightly coloured devilled eggs. “I figured these would make a nice starter before dinner.”

“And you would figure right sweetie,” said Perry, giving them a kiss on their purple cheek, “now, what can I get you all to drink?”

x-x-x

“Here you go! Three pounds of choice  _ purple lilac.” _

Kyle held out the neatly wrapped packet to LaFontaine with a bright smile before his expression slackened and a look of abject horror crossed his face.

“I mean pork loin,” he said, his face a study in guilt, “I am so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking.”

LaFontaine laughed. “Dude, it's alright. This is self inflicted. I'd be a pretty poor sport if I couldn't take a little teasing over it.”

His shoulders sagged in relief. “Good attitude to have, but the apology stands. It's one thing to put up with ribbing from your friends, but not the man at the meat counter.”

LaFontaine glared playfully at him. “My dear Mr. Krieger, are you implying that we're not friends?”

“Of course not, but I am also your butcher. You should expect at least some level of professionalism,” he said.

“Please,” scoffed Laf, “over lunch yesterday, Claire joked about tossing me into one of their berry pies no fewer than a dozen times.”

“Well, that's just Claire,” said Kyle, “she would see that diner run ‘professionally’ over her dead body. She'd have a harder time ejecting assholes onto the street if she did.”

LaFontaine laughed. “That’s true and I wouldn't have it any other way.” They tossed their order into a shopping bag and walked to the door. “Well, next stop, Mr. Parsons shop.”

“Say hi to mark for me. If you hide in the plums, you can jump out and scare him,” said Kyle.

“I would never do that,” said Laf, “with this colour, the eggplants would work so much better.”

“Good thinking! Have fun,” said Kyle with a laugh.

“Will do,” said Laf as they went out the door.

x-x-x

“Come on, come on…”

“Laf, sweetie? I'm home.”

Once again, LaFontaine jumped as their concentration broke. There was a loud rattle as the pressure began to spike. This time however, there was the telltale hiss of a safety valve and the experiment settled down.

“Still at it?” asked Perry.

“Yeah, but no closer though,” said Laf, “though my safety set up seems to be working. Which is good, because I don't think green would suit me anywhere near as well.”

“I thought you'd be eager to resemble Bunsen Honeydew,” teased Perry.

“For Halloween, maybe,” said Laf, “though I’d worry about the amount of hairspray we'd need to turn you into a proper Beeker.”

Perry paused. “I really wish that wasn't such a good costume idea. Carmilla already gives me a hard enough time for being high pitched and squeaky.”

“That's why it's such a good costume,” argued Laf, “she's got less leverage if you lean into it.”

“That's true enough,” she said, wrapping her arms around them, “is it wrong that I'm a little sad that it didn't go and give me a chance to help you again?”

“No, you like to help. It's one of the reasons why I love you,” said Laf, “if you'd really like I can set it off intentionally.” They started reaching towards the safety valve.

“Oh stop it,” she said, lightly slapping their hand, “I don't want you to have to walk around technicoloured for another week, just so that I have an excuse to pull your clothes off again.”

Laf reached back and ran a hand down her face. “Well, who said you needed an excuse for that.” Without breaking her hold, they began walking them backwards towards the bathroom door.

She giggled and kissed them on the cheek as they edged through the door and shut it behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No clue where this one came from, I just kinda pieces it together in amongst Easter weekend family visits. Go figure.
> 
> _Oompa Loompa doompadee doo..._


	96. Bake it at Face Value

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who makes the better cookies? The baker or the enthusiast?

“Ok… so don’t get mad… but I might have started a war…”

Sky looked up from where she was scratching Tenzing’s ears. “A war? With whom?”

“Not with… between,” said Mercy sheepishly.

Sky switched to rubbing the cat’s cheeks as she continued to stare calmly at her girlfriend, awaiting explanation.

“Well, I may have not been thinking and said that Mom made the best chocolate chip cookies in the world…”

“wait… small mom or tall mom?” teased Sky.

“Small mom, isn’t it obvious?” said Mercy before both giggled.

“Well, I wouldn’t agree that assertion personally,” said Sky, “but I don’t see—”

“In front of your Mom…” Mercy continued.

“Well, I doubt she agreed with that sentiment either.” Sky chuckled. “But Mom’s more a live and let—”

“and Laf.” Mercy chewed on her knuckle.

“Oh,” was all that Sky said.

“Yep,” agreed Mercy, “oh.” She sat down beside Sky on the couch, adding a hand to petting Tenzing, much to his immense enjoyment.

“So I presume they’ve decided a challenge is in order,” said Sky.

“Yep.”

“Despite the protestations of both our moms?”

Mercy’s face scrunched up.“Well… against the protests of your Mom. My mom on the other hand seemed kinda gung ho about the entire thing.”

Sky laid her head on Mercy’s shoulder. “Well, that doesn’t sound so bad. They each bake a batch of cookies and try them out. Seems harmless enough.”

Sky couldn’t see Mercy’s face, but she felt her wince.

“What?” asked Sky.

“Well, Laf wanted to kinda make it a… thing,” said Mercy, “as in a party.”

“That actually sounds kinda fun,” said Sky, “so why does it still feel like the other shoe has yet to drop?” She lifted her head and looked at Mercy, who already had an apology written all over her face.

“Well, Mom—” Mercy paused at Sky’s smirk. She rolled her eyes. “ _ Tall _ mom and Mama decided that their house could be used for the party, but that since I was the one who opened my big mouth…”

“Then you got the auspicious task of throwing the party,” finished Sky.

“Yeah,” said Mercy, “so I don’t suppose you wanna, maybe, help me?”

“You’re so lucky I love you,” said Sky.

“Well, obviously,” said Mercy, “but will you help me with the party?” She grinned at Sky who couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes, of course.”

x-x-x

Sky pulled the barbeque lid closed and tossed the scrub pad onto the hooks on the grill’s side. She wiped her brow in a futile attempt to clear a little of the sweat away. The barbeque chicken they’d made might have been tasty, but getting the now caramelized glaze off of the bars was a problem that required no small amount of elbow grease, to say nothing of patience.

Taking a moment to catch her breath, she nodded in satisfaction and headed back into the house, moving around all the family members milling about on the deck. There was a buzz of anticipation about them as they looked forward to the moment of truth, or more to their benefit, the moment of cookies.

“Alright, grill’s taken care of,” said Sky as she walked into the house. She took a moment to inhale the warm, sweet smell of butter and sugar that permeated the air.

Mercy looked up from the sink of dishes she was working through. “Aww, babe. I said that you could leave that for me. I would have dealt with it.”

“I know you would have,” said Sky, “and would have spent hours trying to clean off a cold grill. This way it took me ten minutes and it is done, end of story.”

“Well, thank you.” She lifted her hands out of the water to hug Sky before pausing, looking at her sudsy hands. She took a second to think before beckoning Sky with a crooked finger.

Sky obliged and stepped up to Mercy, receiving a kiss on the cheek.

The moment was unfortunately disturbed by a distinct gagging noise.

“Get a room you two,” teased Aaron, wearing a shit-eating grin with face propped up by both hands.

“Ok!” said Sky, “you’re the boss. I guess you’re running the party now.” She grabbed Mercy’s soapy hand and began pulling her towards the stairs and Mercy’s childhood room..

“Oh cut it out,” said Mercy, extricating her hand from Sky’s grip with a playful slap, before giving Aaron a mock glare, “why did we invite you again?”

“Because you love my beautiful face and enamouring disposition,” said Aaron.

“Eh,” said Mercy, wavering her hand.

“Because you love my incredible wit?” he asked.

“Meh,” said Sky.

Drix walked into the kitchen. “Because you love me and know we’re a package deal.”

“Right, that’s it,” agreed Mercy, smirking at Aaron’s put on pout.

“So, are we just gonna stand around taking pot shots at me or are there actually gonna be cookies at some point?”

“Oh, there will be cookies, and they will be glorious,” said Laura, sweeping into the kitchen, oven mitts already on her hands. Scampering over the oven, she crouched down in front of the door and hungrily watched her creation within. “So close… so close… so—”

_ Bing-bing-ba-bing! _

“Done!” exclaimed Laura, pulling the door open. She ducked her head in only to immediately recoil from the blast of heat escaping. “Ow, every time.”

“Eh, two out of ten. It doesn’t really properly count if your eyebrows are still intact,” said Laf as they walked in carrying a thermal delivery bag.

“Sweetie, please don’t encourage our friends to scald their faces off,” said Perry, carrying a thermal bag of her own, “it’s bad enough our daughter has picked up the habit.”

“You say habit, I say legacy,” argued Laf. They proudly glanced out the door where Hazel was snuggled under her wife’s arm, with expertly drawn eyebrows where the genuine article had been up until a few days ago. “Alright frosh, you ready to throw down?”

Laura poked one of the cookies, testing for doneness. She turned back to Laf with a dangerous grin. “Yep.”

“Alright, if we’re all ready to go…” said Mercy, “get out.”

Laf’s face fell. “Wait, what?”

“Well, we’re doing a blind taste test,” said Sky, “which means you can’t know which is which. So in other words… get out.”

“But how can we get the most votes through artful presentation… and elegantly crafted speeches?” asked Laura.

“You can’t. That’s the point,” said Mercy.

“Ah… right,” said Laura, scratching the air with her index fingers, “alright, you win.”

“We do? Yes, we accept your concession,” said Laf.

“Ugh, Laf! No. C’mon,” she said, followed by the rest of the kitchen’s occupants as Sky and Mercy chased them out.

It was only the work of a few minutes for all of the cookies to be plated up and walked outside by the girls.

“Alright, the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” announced Mercy, “the plates are all labelled A or 2.”

“Wouldn’t ‘A or B’ make more sense?” asked Rodney.

“Make sense?” replied Sky, “what fun is there in making sense?”

“She said to the professional choreographer,” he rebutted, “while serving baked goods that require precise measurements to work.”

She paused at his observation. “Huh, I guess you’re right,” she admitted, “which is why we need to introduce a little chaos of our own. Alright, A or 2. When you’ve decided, write down your vote and drop it in the mixing bowl.” She pointed to the large, brightly painted, ceramic bowl on the patio table.

“Ooh, is that the prize?” asked Laura.

“No,” said Mercy, “it’s a nice mixing bowl I bought for our apartment and I thought it’d be a nice accent for the occasion.”

Danny patted a now pouting Laura on the shoulder. “So what is the prize?”

“Nothing,” said Mercy, putting her plates down by the voting bowl “it was these two that wanted the competition. If they want something to ride on it, they can bet amongst themselves. Hey, hey, hey! Only one from each til everyone’s had one.” Mercy went chasing after Joe.

Laura lit up. “Loser mows the winner’s lawn for a month.”

“In a morph suit,” added Laf.

“On camera!” exclaimed Laura.

“Done!” agreed Laf.

“Lafontaine!” exclaimed Perry.

“Relax Perry. There’s no way you can lose,” said Laf, “and even if the unthinkable happens, I’ll be the one mowing their lawn. You know I wouldn’t make bets on your behalf, this is all me.”

Perry rolled her eyes, but nodded at Lafontaine who turned back to Laura and shook her hand, sealing the deal.

The tasting went by quietly, with everyone pretentiously humming and hawing over the taste of the cookies.

“Hmmm…” said Aaron, “I’m getting notes of leather and tobacco, with just a hint of wanton absurdity.”

“Really?” said Drix, “I’m not getting that at all. I’m getting more overtones of stonefruit with a subtle aftertaste of joy of a laughing child.”

“Oh, you’ve got a ‘2’ cookie there,” said Aaron, “I was talking about ‘A’.”

“Oh, well that makes perfect sense,” replied Drix.

“Alright you clowns, we’re just waiting on you,” said Sky, walking up with the bowl and slips of paper.

The two men just grinned at her before casting their votes.

“Alright!” said Sky, after all the votes were tallied, “we have the results.”

The two girls remained silent, letting everyone stew for just a few moments.

It was Laura that broke first. “And?!”

“It’s a tie!” announced Mercy, grinning like a loon.

“What?!” shouted Laf. They looked at Perry, who actually looked quite pleased at the result. “I want a recount!”

“We already did,” said Sky, “twice.”

“I guess we should have invited an odd number of people,” said Danny.

“Well, to be fair, we did,” said Carmilla, “Sasha’s just stuck on overtime at the hospital.”

“So how do we decide who wins?” asked Lafontaine.

“Why do we need a winner?” asked Perry, “Laura’s quite a good baker. I’d honestly be shocked given how many cookies she eats if she didn’t have as much practice as me, if not more.”

Laf shook their head. “Yes, Laura is an excellent baker. But she isn’t you.” They picked a cookie up from one of the ‘A’ plates and held it up. “Your cookies have no equal.”

“Uh, Laf,” interjected Sky, “the ‘A’ cookies were Laura’s.”

“But… wait… what… no…” stammered Laf, completely distraught, “I voted for ‘A’...”

“Aw, sweetie,” said Perry, pulling Lafontaine into a hug, “it’s alright.”

“If it makes you feel any better Laf, I use Perry’s recipe,” said Laura. Every head in the place snapped to look at her. “What?”

“You’re using the same recipe?” asked Danny.

“You didn’t know?” asked Perry, “I thought that was the point. See who did it better… which is a bit tricky when baking.”

“Same,” said Laura, “I mean it’s a damn good recipe. Best I’ve ever had. I certainly wasn’t going to mess with it.”

“So this whole thing was pointless?” asked Laf.

“Pointless?” said Laura, “we’ve spent the last hour deliberately enjoying cookies. If that’s not a good point, I don’t know what is.”

“But we haven’t determined anything,” said Sky, “and given you made us  _ throw an entire party _ , I’d like some sort of closure.”

“Well, we did,” said Mercy.

Sky tilted her head at Mercy. “We did?”

“Yeah. We proved that my mom  _ does _ make the best chocolate chip cookies in the world… because it’s the same cookies made by  _ your _ mom,” said Mercy.

“Huh, I suppose that is rather conclusive,” said Sky, “alright, debate is over. We can stop talking about eating cookies, and get down to the important task of  _ actually _ eating cookies. Seriously, I don’t know how we have so many left. You two went a bit overboard.”

“I like to think of it as thorough,” said Laura

“I just wanted to make sure everyone had enough,” said Perry.

“Works either way, so everyone dig in,” said Mercy as the party goers descended on the plates once more.


	97. Bound to Work

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes getting your degree requires putting up with annoying people

“Umm… babe? Can you come help me with this?”

Hazel looked up from her own notes, a page of scribbles, eraser tailings and a handful of chemical symbols if you squinted at it right. “Sure yeah, be right there.” She levered herself off the floor, knees and back aching from kneeling over the coffee table for so long. “I am twenty-four and effectively immortal, my joints are  _ not _ allowed to creak like this.”

She hobbled stiffly over to the office to find Charlie attempting to staple an absurdly thick raft of paper.

“Y’know, if you wanted to read War and Peace, we could have bought you the ePub for your reader for a couple of bucks,” said Hazel.

“Oh, ha ha,” griped Charlie, “this is my term paper.”

“The one on egypt?” asked Hazel.

“The very same.” Charlie leaned on the stapler, trying to encourage it to pierce the pages.

“What was the length requirement?” Hazel poked the pile of paper experimentally.

“Twenty pages,” said Charlie, “minimum.”

“This is more than twenty pages.”

“Yeah… I know that,” said Charlie, “I mean I was on track for twenty pages, before it got away from me.”

Curious, Hazel thumbed through the pages, marvelling at the detailed maps and pictures that had been included in amongst the text. “You did leave  _ some _ toner in the printer, right? I’ve got a lab report to print tomorrow.”

“I bought a new cartridge,” said Charlie, pointing to a box on the shelf.

Hazel rolled her eyes and continued her perusal. “Wait… this bit isn’t about egypt… this is Mycenae.” Hazel looked at Charlie in confusion.

“Yeah… there’s a section in there for the Hittites as well,” said Charlie, “kinda a package deal when you get anywhere near the bronze age collapse.”

“Was the paper on the bronze age collapse?” asked Hazel.

“Well… no, it was on the Ramesses dynasty, but it was about the same time and one thing led to another…”

“This was why you spent so many nights in the library until closing isn’t it?”

“Yeah, sorry,” said Charlie sheepishly.

Hazel sighed. “You don’t have to apologize to me. I got plenty done in the lab while I was waiting for you. Dr. Kawasumi was really impressed. Plus, there is something really fun about doing midnight dinner after a hard day’s work.”

“I’m glad you thought so,” said Charlie, “I’ve been vaguely worried you were gonna leave me if we had frozen lasagna one more time.”

Hazel wrapped her arms around Charlie. “I’d never leave you over that… now, hot pockets maybe…”

“Blech, I’d pack the car for you personally.”

“And that’s why I love you,” said Hazel before doing a flip of the pages, “cause it’s certainly not for your sense of ‘stapleable thicknesses of paper’.”

Charlie looked from the stapler, to her fiancée, back to the stapler and back to her fiancée. “You think you could soup it up?”

“The stapler?”

“Yeah!”

Hazel stared at Charlie for a moment with a bemused smile. “No, sweetie.”

“Oh… could Laf?”

Hazel had to bite her lip to keep from laughing at the absurdity of the statement. “I’m fairly certain even they can’t bend the laws of space enough to get a tiny shard of steel through that much paper without also rendering the paper into its component atoms.”

Charlie stared at the stapler. “So…”

“So we go to the campus print shop tomorrow and get them to bind it into a nice professional looking book,” said Hazel, gently prying Charlie’s hands off the stapler.

“But it’s not a book… it’s a paper,” said Charlie.

Hazel groaned. “Are you actually this tired or are you just messing with me now?”

Charlie wiggled her hand. “A little from column A, a little from column B.”

“You are awful, you know that?” said Hazel.

“And yet, you love me,” crowed Charlie.

“And yet, I love you,” said Hazel, “c’mon, let’s make dinner. If I don’t eat something I’m gonna mix up Rhodium with Radon or something equally horrendous.”

“Sounds good, I’ll get out the lasagna,” said Charlie.

“You’re pushing it, Hollis…”

x-x-x

“Okay, honesty time. I really don’t like coming here,” said Charlie as they walked into the student union’s copy centre.

“Why not?” asked Hazel, “I mean, sure, it’s a little hot in here. And it smells kinda toxic… how good’s the ventilation in here?”

“I try not to think about it,” said Charlie, as they reached the counter, “but that’s not the problem, the problem is…”

They stood there in silence. Charlie looked back and forth, trying to spot something.

“The problem is… what?” said Hazel.

“Hmmm… I figured that would work,” said Charlie, “well, the p—”

“Hello Hollis,” said Sandra, making Charlie jump.

“Gah! Where’d you come from?” exclaimed Charlie.

“Over there,” said Sandra matter-of-factly, pointing to a copier with all of its panels open, “hey Hazel, how’s it going?”

“Pretty good,” said Hazel, “how long have you worked here?”

“A couple years now, surprised I haven’t run into you,” said Sandra.

“Perks of being an RA. I get full run of the department photocopier,” said Hazel smugly.

“Nice,” said Sandra, “best I got from the English department was fifty pages a year in the faculty print lab. There’s a reason I took this job, y’know.”

Hazel winced. “Ooh yeah, fair enough.”

“So what can I do for ya?” Sandra asked Charlie, the two sharing a mildly antagonistic smirk.

“I need these bound with a cover,” she said, pulling the sheaf of paper from her bag.

Sandra stared at the pile. “Hollis, how many trees did you murder for this monstrosity?”

“It’s not that bad,” said Charlie, before glancing at the pile, “this is a sapling at worst.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” jeered Sandra. She took the pile and wandered back into the small farm of equipment cordoned off behind the counter.

“You really don’t like her, do you?” said Hazel.

“What? I like her just fine,” said Charlie, “she’s just a lot to take when I can’t kick her.”

“Feeling’s mutual,” called Sandra.

“Speaking of,” said Charlie, “we still on to spar Saturday morning?”

“You know it!”

“I thought you were going to the gym Saturday— of course, not sure why I thought you’d be lifting weights,” said Hazel, smiling in spite of herself.

“Of course not,” said Charlie, “it hurts  _ and _ it’s boring. If I gotta hurt for my health, I sure as hell am gonna have some fun while I do it.”

“Damn straight, Hollis,” said Sandra, “this is why we get along”

“That and being able to kick the snot out of each other when we get irritated,” said Charlie, “hence our current predicament.”

“Well fortunately, it is short lived and we can escape this without assault charges,” said Sandra, slapping down the expertly bound volume in front of them.

“Easy there!” complained Charlie, “I still have to hand this thing in.”

“That sounds like a ‘not me’ problem,” said Sandra, “that’ll be thirteen bucks.”

“Thirteen bucks!” exclaimed Charlie.

“Yeah, I know. It’s not professional to give you my discount, but that’s just the sort of person I am,” said Sandra with a self-satisfied smile.

“I am so looking forward catching you with a roundhouse,” said Charlie, counting out the bills and handing them off.

Sandra took the money. “You mean  _ try _ .”

“Well, of course,” said Charlie, getting a suspicious look, “trying’s the first step towards succeeding. Bye now!” She turned with a wave as Sandra guffawed behind her.

“Bye Sandra,” said Hazel.

“Bye Hazel, take it easy,” said Sandra through her chuckles.

“Well, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” said Hazel.

“No, she toned it down today, maybe cause I actually made her do something,” said Charlie, “she usually hovers over my shoulder making snarky comments like a deranged parrot.”

“Y’know, if you two didn’t actively antagonize each other, you wouldn’t have to meet up to beat each other up on a regular basis,” said Hazel.

Charlie responded with a raised eyebrow.

“Right, where would the fun be in that?” said Hazel, rolling her eyes.

“Exactly,” said Charlie, “now let me go turn this in and I’ll treat you to dinner.”

“Oh, ok!” said Hazel, “what are you thinking?”

“Frozen lasagna,” said Charlie, throwing an arm around Hazel.

“I want a divorce,” she said.

“We’re not married yet,” said Charlie.

“Dammit, fine,” said Hazel, “we get dinner, but then we go spend some time wedding planning so that we can get married and  _ then _ I can divorce you.”

Charlie laughed. “Done.”


	98. Grounded Infect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laf needs medical attention

_ Crash _

“Uh… Perry? Little help.”

Laf's request had been redundant. Perry was already up and running the moment she'd heard the loud noise from the basement. She got to the bottom of the stairs and flew through the lab’s open door to find Laf sitting in their desk chair, blood trickling down their arm as they kept their other hand clamped over the wound.

“What happened?” asked Perry, grabbing the first aid kit with a calmness that one might find almost dismissive. 

LaFontaine knew better though as they watched her pull on a pair of nitrile gloves. As far as Perry was concerned, good first aid was just another way to clean, which meant she could focus.

“Not entirely certain on the why, but the what is that my beaker stand tipped over on its own and the glass beaker broke across my arm,” said Laf, nodding over to the counter where shards of glass littered the floor.

Perry frowned, glancing at the shrapnel before turning her attention back to Lafontaine. “Okay, let me see.”

They lifted their hand to reveal the cut. Long but smooth and fairly shallow. While it was still bleeding, it was little more than a seep now and would likely ebb on it’s own, not that Perry had any intention of waiting that long. She grabbed the bottle of saline and set about cleaning the cut.

Lafontaine winced at the sting of the salt-water, grunting involuntarily.

“Just another few seconds, honey,” said Perry, “so any idea what the cause was?”

“No, I’d just set up a new culture. A fungus from a standing stone in Kerry that a colleague sent me,” said Laf, “I was actually just cleaning up for the day.”

“A standing stone? In Ireland?” Perry looked them in the eye.

“...yeah?” Laf said, unsure how it was relevant, “apparently the local fae lost their attunement to it. There was no etheric reason that they could find, so they’re testing everything.”

Perry relaxed slightly as she wiped the wound clean. “Well, I’m glad we don’t have to worry about angry fair folk coming to whisk you away.”

Lafontaine chuckled. “I’m a bit dense, but even I won’t stick my nose into their business unasked… do I look like a journalism student to you?”

They both shared a laugh.

“So, out of curiosity,” said Perry, “how did you contain the moss?”

“Fungus.”

“Fungus, right,” said Perry, “a ward?”

Lafontaine looked at her blankly.

“An inscribed circle?”

Lafontaine’s brow furrowed

“For goodness sake, a ring of salt?” Perry asked in frustration. She looked toward the counter, already knowing she’d spot none of the preparations there.

“I clamped it to the ring stand so it wouldn’t fall,” they said sheepishly, “which I guess didn’t work.”

Perry’s worry began to rise again, as did her voice. “Sweetie, you have something that might have been messing with fae magicka.”

Lafontaine groaned. “You’re right. I’ve got wards to keep things in the lab, but I didn’t think smaller scale. That was really stupid of me.” They pointed to a cupboard across the room. “I keep a bag of salt in there, would you mind encircling it to keep it in one place until I can clean up?”

“Certainly sweetie,” said Perry, looking over to the glass shards, “where is it?”

“It’s right… there?” they responded. The glass shards of beaker were all perfectly clean. The grey-green slime that had been sitting in the beaker was nowhere to be found. “I think you have a point about containment.”

Perry frowned as she walked over the door and poured a line of salt across the threshold. “Well, if nothing else, that’ll keep it in here while we get you cleaned up.” She set the salt down by the door and stepped through, holding her hand out for Laf.

They nodded and with another quick glance around the room for their subject, they went to take Perry’s hand. Taking her hand with their good arm, they started following her when their injured arm jerked and stopped them like a leash going taut. Testing going forward again, their stomach dropped as they realized what they were going to see when they looked. Sure enough, the cut in their arm was being stopped dead by the line of salt in the doorway.

“Uh, Perry?” they said, “I think I found my fungus.”

Perry flew back down the stairs and grabbed Lafontaine’s arms, holding it so she could get better light. On Laf’s skin, spreading away from the cut were dark grey tendrils. They were still tiny, easy to miss beneath the blood, but they were visibly growing.

“Oh no, sweetie. This is more than I can handle with a dressing and a bandage. We need to get you to the hospital,” said Perry.

“I think this is a little outside their wheelhouse, Perr,” said Laf, “I don’t think a standard antifungal agent is going to have much effect on Tir Na Mold here.”

Perry bit her lip before running back into the lab and grabbing a felt pen from Laf’s desk. “Give me your arm,” she demanded, holding out her free hand.

“O...kay?” said Laf, placing the injured arm in her hands.

Perry immediately set to work, drawing a whole set of lines and sigils above and below the wound. She remained silent as she worked, laying down ink as fast as she could. When she finished, she looked at it with little certainty.

“Wow, Perr. I thought you didn’t study that stuff anymore,” said Laf, turning their arm to get a better look at her handiwork.

“I don’t,” she said, “I just did that from memory. I have no clue how well it will work, if at all. I’m not even sure if a ring around the arm counts as a circle.”

“It certainly  _ looks  _ authentic,” said Laf, “too bad we don’t know anyone who knows this fairy stuff as well as you do. We could use some help.”

Perry lit up. “Well…”

x-x-x

“You idiot.”

“Come now, Carmilla. Isn't that a little harsh?” asked Perry, “it's not like they have our experience with fairies.”

“This is not just about fairies.” She turned to LaFontaine, holding up their arm. The grey lines had spidered out and were slowly filling the space between Perry's inscriptions like a demonic ivy. The barriers, at least, were holding... for now. “You knew this could be magical, but like every time, you don't respect that which does not want to be understood. It is only sheer dumb luck that nothing catastrophic has happened when you've gotten in over your head before.”

LaFontaine shrank in on themself.

Perry looked uncomfortable. “Carmilla, I—”

“Perr, no. She’s right.” Lafontaine looked at Perry guiltily. “It’s one thing to lose my eyebrows cause I lit a pile of magnesium for fun. This… this is something literally a world apart. I can’t be so flippant when I’m dealing with this stuff.”

Perry sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Yes, fine. She is right. You remember how to keep everyone else safe and out of harms way, but then merrily run right into the blast radius. The idea that something might go wrong and I’d never see you again terrifies me to my core.” Perry wrapped her arms around Lafontaine’s neck and touched their foreheads together. “But I’ve never said anything, because I don’t want you to stop either. You love it and are probably going to do some amazing good for the world.”

“Well, that or break it in two, which could be fun,” said Carmilla, drawing sidelong glances from the couple, “but we can discuss how best to keep them from becoming a ginger silhouette on the wall later. There’s still your personal garden trellis there to deal with.”

“I don’t suppose you have any idea how to deal with that,” asked Perry.

“You’re asking me?” said Carmilla, “you do remember that the last time we had a problem like this, my preferred answer was to kill the summoner, a.k.a. you.”

Laf’s jaw dropped. “Wait, what?”

“It’s ok sweetie,” said Perry, before turning back to Carmilla “I’d hope that our relationship has improved enough for that to no longer be your first recourse.”

Carmilla rubbed her chin sagely. “I dunno, taking their arm off at the shoulder would solve the issue pretty neatly.” She paused to enjoy the discomfited look on Laf’s face before a glare from Perry got her to relent. “I’m kidding! I like the two of you being in one piece too much, but this is beyond me. You need to go see Zeke.”

“Zeke…”

“My doctor,” said Carmilla, pulling up his number on her phone, “Zeke Antos, supernatural medical specialist. He’s one of the best, according to him at least.” She dialed. “Doctor Antos, please… Hey Zeke, how’s it going?... Just fine, he’s figured out how to roll himself over… yeah, I know. So, the reason I’m calling is a friend of mine has gotten some kind of magical infection… not sure, it was in their lab… yeah, Lafontaine… I dunno, grey lines, kinda like a plant. They’ve managed to corral them with an inscription… yeah, ok… I’ll let them know. Thanks. I’ll see you next month for Drix’s checkup… You too, bye Zeke.”

“So?” asked Laf.

“Well, I got bad news and good news,” said Carmilla, “the bad news is you need to treat that before it breaks out and kills you. The good news is that he can see you right now, so we are going.”

“Like…  _ now _ now?” asked Laf.

“Yup,” said Carmilla, pulling her car keys out, “now move it carrot top.”

x-x-x

“Well Child, looks like you were a bit too clever for your own good.” Dr. Antos looked over the infection, which had turned the space between the wards almost completely grey.

“Not clever enough, more like,” said Laf, “I’ll spare you the myriad of safety steps I missed.”

Zeke chuckled. “Ah, the impatience of youth. I remember studying a young chimera when I was only a few centuries old. I figured a cub wouldn’t need the restraints of an adult. It took nearly two months for my hand to grow back fully.”

“It bit it off?” asked Laf.

“No, the snake head bit it,” said Zeke, “I had to cut it off myself before the venom spread. Even immortals have their limits.” They noted with satisfaction as Laf went pale. “Fortunately, my friend, what you have here is a slightly tamer beast than viper venom.”

“Wait, you know what it is?” asked Laf.

“Yes, it’s a parasitic colony, usually found in the pacific northwest. They are typically inert, but can creep and hop around in search of food” said Zeke.

“Or say, maybe, to unbalance a beaker?” asked Laf.

Zeke chuckled. “That too. They tend to latch onto something magical and feed. Kinda like scabies but magic instead of blood.”

“Ew,” said Laf, “but I’m not magical and this stuff came from Ireland, from a standing stone.”

“You should tell whoever sent that to clean that stone thoroughly. In a place like Éire, they’d feed on everything if they got a foothold,” said Zeke, “and as for you, after several weeks without food, you’d jump at whatever seemed the slightest bit edible too.”

“Fair point.”

“Now, I’m afraid that since that cut has allowed them inside your person, the treatment is a bit less pleasant, though still far better than dying,” Zeke said, pulling out a syringe with something metallic.

Laf grinned. “Mystery injections? Now you’re talking my language!”

Zeke smiled. “You are an odd one, though far be it for me to complain about a perspective that makes this easier for both of us.” Zeke injected the fluid into Laf’s arm and they watched enraptured as the grey lines turned white, spreading out from the injection site.

“That is so cool, what is that? Some kinda of magical inhibitor?” they asked.

“A good deal more simple than that, a basic silver solution,” said Zeke, “you’re actually somewhat lucky. Many of my patients are deathly allergic to silver, so such a problem would be much harder to treat.”

Laf’s smile faded. “Like werewolves?”

“They aren’t quite as vulnerable as legend tells,” said Zeke, “but it would prove to be a hindrance nonetheless.”

“I am so glad I did not get this anywhere near Danny,” they said.

“As am I child,” said Zeke, “especially as I am not her physician, in spite of dear Mircalla’s invitations. The wolf packs see me as being aligned with vampires. While my vocation has meant they’ve never held ill will towards me, they’ve never trusted enough to seek me out, despite a lack of other resources nearby. I’d hoped their new family…  _ your _ new family might build that bridge.”

Lafontaine thought for a moment. “Well, I have an idea that may help. Are you taking new patients?”

Zeke smiled. “Always.”

x-x-x

Carmilla and Perry looked up as Laf left Zeke’s office, a smile on their face.

“So?” asked Perry.

“He fixed it,” said Laf, holding up their arm to show off the lattice work of dead lines, “it’ll stay that way for a bit until my body can clean it out. In the meantime, I just have to keep it clean to stop run of the mill infections.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” said Perry, “Carmilla, thank you for bringing us here.”

“Hey, no problem,” said Carmilla, “I’d honestly kinda miss ya, plus Laura and Danny are pretty fond of you, and I’d rather not upset them.”

Lafontaine chuckled as Dr. Antos walked out of the office and up to the reception desk.

“Hey, thanks again, Doc,” said Laf.

“Of course, Ser Lafontaine,” said Zeke, “and I will see you next month for your physical.”

“I’ll see you then,” said Laf as Zeke went behind the reception desk.

“Physical?” asked Perry.

“Yeah, Zeke’s my GP now.”

“Why?” asked Carmilla, “you’re human.”

“So are plenty of his patients,” said Laf, “you didn’t think he could just run a practice on the handful of vampires and other supernaturals around here, did you?”

“Not anymore, I don’t,” replied Carmilla, feeling foolish.

“Besides, having a doctor versed in magical ailments will probably be pretty handy for someone like me, wouldn’t you say?”

“I think it’s a wonderful idea, sweetie,” said Perry, “especially since your last doctor never quite seemed to grasp your non-binary-ness.”

“Ooh yeah, even better,” said Laf, “I think this turned out for the better, all told.”

Perry smiled. “I’m glad you see it that way.”

“Now as a thank you, if you don’t mind stopping on the way back,” Laf said to Carmilla, “why don’t I pick up some steaks and all the fixin’s and we’ll make you guys dinner.”

“Well, we’d get Danny to grill, if she doesn’t mind,” said Perry, “she’s really good at steak.”

“Good point, but the offer stands,” said Laf.

“My friend’s not messily dead  _ and _ a steak dinner?” said Carmilla, “I’d call that a pretty good end to the day. Let’s go.”

The three left the office as behind them, an ancient physician chuckled at the resilience of youth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I swear I'm not trying to make a habit of making Laf's stuff go awry, or get them hurt for that matter, it just made a good launch point for this topic. Maybe I'll give them a chapter where they get a huge science grant... waitaminute... *runs off to edit idea list*
> 
> Cheers all!


	99. Out of the Picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura gets the kids to help her tidy her office, but she's forgotten about something she filed away years before.

Laura carefully carried the pile of old articles into the living room. “Guys, I cannot thank you enough for coming by to help.”

Drix poked his head out from behind the stack of file boxes he was lugging behind her. “We’re happy to do it, Mom,” he said, gently setting the stack down on the coffee table, “not like we were just gonna say ‘well, guess you're screwed! Lol.’.”

“Did you just say ell… No, I can’t. Did you just say ‘laugh out loud’... out loud?” asked Aaron, glaring at Drix with an affronted expression.

“Maaaaaaybe,” said Drix cheekily.

“I want a divorce.”

“Ugh, again? These lawyer fees are really starting to add up,” whined Drix.

“Talk to our guy,” said Sky as she leafed through a sheaf of documents, “he gives a bulk discount and every tenth one is free!”

“Plus he has a stash of available fine china, so you don't have to sacrifice your own on a good angry throw,” added Mercy.

Sky dropped her head onto the papers in front of her. “It was one time!”

Mercy snuggled up to Sky. “I know, baby… one time more than anyone else.”

Sky glared at her wife before looking at Aaron. “He also does two-for-one, care to split?”

“Ooh, I love a good bargain,” said Aaron, putting the box he was carrying down.

“Okay, so can we maybe change the topic before we end up tearing our entire family apart?” asked Laura.

“Not the entire family,” said Charlie, “Hazel and I are fine.”

“We got divorced yesterday, remember?” said Hazel.

“Oh yeah.” Charlie thoughtfully tapped her lips with a finger. “It really does all blur together.”

“You kids and your divorces,” said Danny,  “back in my day, we just separated. A lot cheaper and you don't have to stand in line at city hall for your remarriage the entire next day.”

“What can we say?” said Drix, “I guess we're just more committed to maintaining a healthy relationship in this day and age.”

“Our relationship is plenty healthy, thank you very much,” protested Laura.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Mom,” said Charlie, “oh hey, what about this one? Keep or pitch?”

Laura leaned forward to look at the article. “Hmm… the demolition of that old coffee shop…”

“The one you were for or against? asked Carmilla.

“For.”

Carmilla grinned. “I liked that one, it was a refreshing change to see you in favour of blowing something up.”

“I didn’t want it blown up,” said Laura, “it was a lovely building and the people trying to protect it certainly weren’t wrong that it had plenty of historical value. But when something is so condemned that you’re not legally allowed  _ near _ it, to say nothing of in it, restoration kinda becomes a moot point.”

“Plus, there is something kinda beautiful about watching two backhoes tear apart a cultural touchstone inside of thirty minutes,” mused Carmilla.

“Uh-huh,” grumbled Laura, “pitch it. If I hold onto every POV and puff piece, this is gonna be a pointless endeavour.”

“Done and done,” said Charlie, crumpling up the newsprint and tossing it into the blue bin they’d brought in.

“You did that just to spite me, didn’t you?” asked Carmilla.

“Every single thing here is saved on my hard drive, you can read it there if you really want to,” said Laura, “and yes.”

“Y’know? You kids make a good point, do you have a business card available?” said Carmilla.

“Sure do!” said Mercy, handing Carmilla one of Laura’s business cards, “ask for Luke.”

“Ha ha,” said Laura, flinging a ball of paper across the room to land in the bin, “woo, two points.”

Aaron took a sip of the ale he’d been keeping on the side table. “So once we’re done this, are we building the new desk today? or is this one of those, take our time, it’s done when it’s done sorta dealies.”

“That one, the second,” said Danny, “this desk isn’t from Ikea—”

Charlie and Hazel both shuddered.

“—and I want to leave as much time as possible to deal with it. We begin at dawn.” Danny paused to take a sip of her own glass. “Or maybe noonish, we’ll see how we’re feelin’.”

Aaron raised his glass in salute. “A tempered and responsible schedule,” he said before returning to the papers in front of him, “well, let me know if you want any help, I kinda enjoy— WHOA!!!” Aaron slammed a page he’d lifted back down onto the table. His face turned dark red and he looked like he might overheat and melt.

“What? What is it?” asked Mercy, leaning forward in anticipation.

“Oh! Nothing! Nothing!” Aaron put on the most unconvincing smile he could possibly have. “Uh…”—he coughed—”Laura? Did you maybe want to file this?” He slid the pile he was working on towards her

Laura looked at him without comprehension as she reached for the pile. However, before she could take hold, Mercy’s hand shot out and dragged the top few pages towards herself.

“Gah!” she yelped after lifting the first page. She turned just as red as Aaron. “Well, curiosity just killed this wolf.”

“Okay. I’m probably gonna regret this but…” Sky lifted the paper. “Ooh, lookin’ hot Auntie Carm.”

“WHAT?!!!” yelped Carmilla, Danny and Laura simultaneously.

“Very tasteful, actually,” Hazel said, looking over Sky's shoulder, “risqué without looking obscene.” She picked it up to show the parents. The kids all recoiled.

“Jeez, Hazel! Really?” complained Charlie, clamping her hands over her eyes, “I don't need to see that.”

“Whatever happened to ‘I'm glad my parents have a healthy sex life’?” teased Hazel.

“I am glad that they do, just preferably not where I can see or hear it,” said Charlie, “and certainly not right in front of my face.”.

Hazel chuckled as Danny leaned forward and finally snatched the photo away.

“Oh hey, I remember this one,” she said, kicking back on the couch, “you and I did this while Laura was in Prague.”

“Well, that explains who the photographer is,” said Sky.

“Can you please stop analysing it?!” exclaimed Mercy.

“I dunno, we put a lot of effort into this one,” said Carmilla, leaning over to look at the photo, pride evident in her face, “I’d say that merits some discussion.”

“No, no it doesn’t,” added in Drix, his lips pressed into a line, “why was that in your articles anyway? Why was it even printed out for that matter? If Mom was in Prague, wouldn’t you have just texted or emailed it?”

“That’s a good question, actually?” said Danny, turning to Laura smugly, “why  _ did _ you print it?”

It was Laura's turn to go red. “I… it's stupid.”

“Oh, I know that tone,” said Carmilla, smiling warmly “it’s sentimental.”

“ _ That _ is sentimental?” Mercy goggled.

“Are you saying you don’t appreciate the  _ sentiment _ when I do things like that for you?” purred Sky, running a finger down Mercy’s neck.

Mercy smacked Sky’s hand away. “Stop that, it makes it hard to think. And that’s not the type of sentiment she’s talking about and you know it.” She looked curiously at Laura, awaiting an answer.

“Well, it was really obvious they’d gone to a lot of trouble. This isn’t just some mirror selfie. I mean, Sky, you dabble in photography. Look at this,” Laura grabbed the photo and slapped it down in the middle of the table for all to see.

“I am suddenly regretting my cockiness about this,” said Carmilla, the photo of her now in the open and under a spotlight.

“Girl up, I’m making a point,” said Laura, her embarrassment forgotten as she began to point at the picture with a pen. Sky leaned in in fascination, Hazel did out of manic amusement. “The framing is great, the lighting is near perfect, everything thing in the shot is perfectly positioned… right down to this subtle roll in the stocking. I think it’s even been colour corrected.”

By now, everyone who wasn’t transfixed by the lecture was absolutely mortified.

“Okay, we get it!” said Mercy, dropping the an entire file box on top of the picture to bring the agitating experience to a halt. “Why is it stashed in your articles?” Mercy leaned over the top of the box, fixing laura with a manic expression.

“Well…” said Laura, her face scrunching up guiltily, “I managed to find a good photo printer to make myself a copy, but then I lost the nerve to go get it framed and I kinda just hid it to come back to later.”

“Framed?” asked Charlie, “to put where?”

“That’s partly why I lost my nerve,” admitted Laura, “I didn’t know. It’s not what you’d really call a good ‘picture of the family’ at work.”

“I dunno, it’d be a sure fire way to get your boss to like me,” joked Carmilla.

“Frank already likes you,” said Laura.

“Aha! So you did put it up!” said Hazel.

“Yes, totally,” deadpanned Laura, “we don’t actually work, we just wile away the hours appreciating my hot wife.”

“Ahem.”

“Wives.”

“Better.”

Drix rubbed his head. “This is not really helping peace of mind here.”

“Shoot, is that what we’re supposed to be doing?” said Danny, “oops, our bad.”

“You’re all heart,” said Charlie, “so before we continue, are there any other surprises we should be careful of as we dig?”

Laura averted her eyes. “Well…”

“You’re kidding,” said Charlie.

Danny looked at Laura. “The other one?”

“Well, yeah. I wasn’t gonna print just the one of Carmilla,” said Laura.

“Y’know what?” said Drix, standing up, “I’m gonna go dust and vacuum the office. It seems, much safer. Anyone interested in joining me?”

Charlie and Mercy both nodded enthusiastically and jumped to their feet.

The three quickly scampered off, the roar of the vacuum quickly covering anything else from that corner of the house.

Laura watched them leave with amusement before turning to their spouses, who’d remained. “And you three?”

Sky looked at Hazel, raising an eyebrow. “Whoever doesn’t find it has to buy dinner?”

“You’re on!” said Hazel as they both dove back into the papers.

Laura choked back a laugh. At least the sorting was moving quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, the idea was the kids making the parents uncomfortable about the picture, but I forget how tenacious our lovely OT3 can be. You think as the author I'd have some control over that, but no.
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed this one!


	100. Ahead By A Century

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For those who are immortal, the passage of time flows from one moment to another.

“You… have too many books.”

Danny shuffled through the front door of the apartment, her face red with exertion as she struggled to keep her grip on the heavy cardboard box.

“No such thing,” argued Carmilla, plucking the box from Danny's hands, “plus I marked this 'Damn heavy! Leave for vampire’ for a reason.” Carmilla tapped a finger on the marker writing under her hand to illustrate her point.

“Well yeah, anything sounds stupid when you look at it in hindsight,” said Danny, “but it's like moving tradition. Carry at least one box that you really should have the good sense not to.”

“Traditions that risk blowing a disc are ones that can be left to the annals of history,” said Carmilla, sweeping out of the room, box in hand before calling back from the bedroom, “I need you in one piece so we can properly christen this place tonight!” 

Danny laughed, taking a moment to indulge in the warm feelings her girlfriend evoked. She spun on her heel, intending to go back for another load, and nearly ran into Gus, lugging a far-too-heavy box of his own. She quickly grabbed the opposite corners to share some of the load.

“This girl has too many books,” he commented.

“Glad to see I'm not the only one ignoring the warning labels,” said Danny as she shuffled backwards towards the bedroom.

“I figured I could handle it,” said Gus.

Carmilla stepped out of the bedroom and watched the pair with a look of wry amusement.

Gus met her gaze with a smirk of his own. “Besides, it's not like you need  _ me _ intact tonight.”

Carmilla snorted with laughter as Danny reddened.

“You heard that, did you?” said Danny

“I might have.” He grinned smugly.

“Good,” jeered Carmilla, “then you know to clear off tonight.”

“Oh I dunno,” said Gus, “all this moving of boxes is so hard. I think I’m going to be too tired to get back to my hotel. I’m going to have to sleep on your couch.”

“Help yourself,” said Carmilla, much to Gus’ surprise. Danny, however knew exactly what was coming. “We’ve still got the spare blankets and pillows from the dorm, should make for a comfy enough bed… oh, and I’ll go grab you some earplugs…” She let the implication hang in the air between them.

He looked at Danny. “I suppose it’s too late to rescind my approval of her, isn’t it?”

“Yep… well, technically not, but you’d have to withdraw you’re approval of me as well,” said Danny.

“And we all know how well that would go,” said Laura, slipping by them with a much lighter box, “and next time, leave the heavy boxes for Carm. I know you want to feel useful, but it just slows things down.” Laura popped back out of the bedroom and out the front door for another load.

Gus fixed Danny with a grin. “Ya ready to live with that, kiddo?”

“Ready and looking forward to it,” said Danny as they eased the box onto the pile, “I’ve been champing at the bit for this for a while, it just wasn’t feasible before I graduated.”

“I told you I would’ve covered the rent,” said Carmilla, carrying in another box of books, “I’d still be happy to if you weren’t so stubborn.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I have no issue you helping us forego a mortgage when you two are finally free and clear of this brobdingnagian school and we can settle down,” said Danny as they began making their way back downstairs for more stuff, “though it was more about finishing out my obligations to the Summers. You can’t really be an active warden of the wilderness when you’re a fifteen minute drive away from the base of operations.”

“Warden of the wilderness?” asked Carmilla with a smirk.

“Yeah, there’s a reason the name is Summer Society. It sounds a whole lot less like a bunch of hipsters asking for donations to save a moss covered rock in the town square,” joked Danny.

Carmilla chuckled. “Just keep telling yourselves that.”

Danny glowered at her.

They got back down to Gus’ truck to find Laura locking the door and walking towards them empty handed.

“What about the rest?” asked Danny.

“That’s it,” said Laura, resting a hand on her hip, “me and Carm got the rest done while you two were busy playing weightlifter.” 

“Wait seriously?” asked Danny.

“No,” said Carmilla, nudging Laura playfully, “well, technically yes, but there were only a couple boxes left. Not much to move beyond the clothes and books, even as well entrenched as we were in that place.”

“Oh, okay then,” said Danny, turning to wrap her arms around her girlfriends as they walked back towards the apartment.

“So now what?” asked Gus. 

“The best part of course,” said Carmilla in a tone that elicited looks of worry from everyone else.

“And that would be?” asked Laura cautiously.

“Furniture shopping!”

“Y’know,” said Gus, “I think she’s being sarcastic.”

“Ya don’t say,” said Danny, “but she’s right. Two dorm rooms of knick-knacks does not an apartment make, we’ve got a lot of hunting to do.” She sighed in exhaustion.

“Hey, we’ve had to make do with whatever the dorms or lodge provided, regardless of how lumpy or cramped it might be,” said Laura, “after all these years,—”

x-x-x

“We deserve to treat ourselves!”

“Cupcake, while I certainly agree with you,” said Carmilla, “I think going out for steak without our wife would be kinda rude.”

“But Caaaarm, the baby really wants it.” She held the sides of her swollen belly like a beach ball.

Carmilla bit her lip before sighing in defeat. “Alright, it’s your lunch break. I guess we can go get steak if you want. Do you have enough time though?”

A laugh floated over the cubicle wall. “She has as much time as she needs,” said Jeana, as she appeared at the entrance, “Grimsdottir tries to run things pretty loose, provided everything gets done. Besides, he’s a total sap. He’ll always give enough time to make sure the little one here gets enough." She stepped up and patted Laura’s belly.

Laura grimaced but didn’t say anything. Carmilla was a bit more assertive, taking hold of Jeana’s wrist and lifting her hand off of Laura.

“Hi, Jeana, was it?” she said with a dangerously sweet tone, “I get that you’re trying to be friendly, but I would really recommend  _ not _ touching my wife without her permission again. You might find the results incredibly unpleasant.”

Jeana stood frozen in Carmilla’s gaze like a scared rabbit. Something in her sensed the predator before her and knew she was perched on the edge of the abyss.

“O-o-o-o-o-of course!” Jeana’s mouth stretched into a stiff rictus as she tried to fake a smile. “I-I-I’ll just… yeah…” Jeana quickly retreated and scampered off down the row.

“Carm! That was mean,” said Laura, smacking the vampire’s arm, “she didn’t mean any harm… even if her doing that every day was getting really irritating.”

“If it stops her from doing that, I’d say it was well worth the effort.”

Laura scowled, avoiding eye contact. “No comment.”

“Exactly.”

“Hey Laura,” came Frank’s voice, “Jeana’s in her cubicle chugging antacids, do you know… ah.”

“Hey Chief,” said Carmilla, giving Frank a quick salute.

“Good to see you, Carmilla,” said Frank, “did you break my marketing associate?”

“Nah, just a little psychosis. Nothing an afternoon off won’t fix,” said Carmilla smugly.

Frank sighed. “Well, she’s already had her big scheduled call for the day, so that should be safe.” He chuckled. “Hollis, future rule. Speak up for yourself before one of your wives intervenes. You’re more diplomatic than they are.”

“They?” asked Carmilla joyfully, “what sort of impression has our dear love left here?”

“Do you remember that misogynistic delivery guy that I complained about for my first couple months here?” said Laura.

“Yes. You wouldn’t let me come break him in half.”

“Well… he kinda made a pass at me… in front of Danny… while she had her arm around me…” said Laura.

“I am simultaneously curious and enraged,” said Carmilla, “please say the resulting interaction will satisfy both of these needs.”

“Well, all I know it's that she frog marched him behind his delivery van and when he emerged, he was pale as a ghost. He got in the driver's seat and just stared of into space,” said Laura, “Danny came back with a spring in her step and we had a very pleasant afternoon.”

“One of his co-workers had to come collect him,” supplied Frank, “we haven't seen him since.”

Carmilla barked out a laugh. “I wonder what revelation she imparted to have such an impressive result.”

“You'd have to ask her,” said Laura, “she says she didn't lay a hand on him, but beyond that she never said.”

“Probably a description of all the interesting ways of twisting a human body that a tiny Krav Maga slash yoga enthusiast can think up when pissed off,” suggested Carmilla.

Laura had to fight the smirk of pride that tried to surface at that suggestion.

“Either way, diplomacy first, implied threats later,” said Frank.

Laura feigned a sigh. “Yes Mr. Grimsdottir.”

“Good,” he said, “now go get some lunch, you're eating for two after all.”

“Will do,” said Laura, grabbing her coat, “I can taste that steak already,—”

x-x-x

“I am just absolutely famished.”

Danny fixed Carmilla with a disbelieving stare. “You're kidding, we just ate breakfast a couple hours ago.”

“We've had one,” chirped Laura, “what about second breakfast?”

“No comments from the peanut gallery,” Danny said, narrowing her eyes at Laura's playful smile.

“We just dropped our youngest off for her first day of school. They’re all getting  _ older,” _ said Carmilla, “pardon me if I'm craving some comfort food.”

“Aww, babe,” cooed Danny. She leaned forward, snaking her arms around the sides of the front passenger seat to hug Carmilla, “comfort food, I think we can do. What were you in the mood for?”

“Something chocolate… and warm,” said Carmilla.

“Ooh, I know just the thing,” said Laura, her thumbs flying over her phone's screen. “Just have to… there. Let's go!” She started the engine and pulled away from the curb.

Out the window, Carmilla watched the receding shape of the elementary school until they'd turned the corner and were out of sight. On the drive, Carmilla and Danny focused on cuddling each other, trying to drive away the separation anxiety. It wasn't until much later that they realized that the series of turns that Laura was making were very familiar.

“Uh, Laura? You driving on autopilot?” asked Danny, “this is the way home.”

“I know, but it's also the way to my objective,” said Laura as they pulled into Laf and Perry's driveway.

Danny smiled. “Good thinking.”

They hopped out and made their way inside where they were met with a warm set aroma and a very enthusiastic greeting.

“Aunty Carm!” exclaimed Sky as she ran up and latched herself onto Carmilla's leg.

“Well hi there,” said Carmilla warmly, ruffling Sky's hair, receiving a happy giggle.

“Ride!” she exclaimed.

Carmilla chuckled. “Alright.” She walked towards the kitchen, easily, if a little awkwardly, swinging her leg as to keep from knocking Sky into anything.

“Salutations!” said Laf, greeting them as they sliced a tray of brownies, “fresh from the oven.” They popped out a large slice and handed it to Carmilla the moment she hobbled into reach.

Carmilla took a bite and groaned with approval. “Damn Darwin, you've got that recipe down pat.”

“Why thank you,” they said, “it's not quite Perry's, but I'm getting the hang of it.”

“I'll say,” Carmilla agreed with her mouth full.

“Can you play with me, Aunty Carm?” asked Sky.

“Of course,” said Carmilla, a weight visibly lifted from her shoulders “hold on!” She walked towards the living room, swinging her leg to make Sky shriek with delight.

“Now that's comfort,” said Laura, taking a brownie from Laf.

“Oh that’s nothing, I’ve got a peach pie coming out in fifteen minutes,” said Laf.

Danny laughed. “Okay, the brownies were impressive,—

x-x-x

“Now you’re just showing off!”

Charlie grinned. “What was that Aaron? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of how impressive I was being.”

“It’s hardly impressive,” he groused.

Charlie flicked her finger, keeping the soccer ball spinning on the tip. “So which is it, Maximoff? Am I showing off or is it unimpressive?” Charlie continued to grin at her friend.

“I hate you… so much.”

“That’s a lie and you know it,” said Charlie.

“Okay fine, I hate that I don’t hate you,” admitted Aaron, “you are so irritating.”

“It’s a gift,” said Charlie.

From somewhere behind Charlie, she heard the front door open and close as someone came into the house.

“Oh, hey Hazel!” greeted Aaron, looking past Charlie’s shoulder.

“Hi there!” came Hazel’s melodic voice from right behind her.

Charlie froze. She could feel her face heat up as her heart started pounding in her chest. Unbidden, a goofy smile started to force its way onto her face. Also unbidden, the spinning ball lost it’s fight with gravity and bounced off the corner of the couch. Only a quick dive across the other couch by Aaron stopped it from collecting it’s toll of breakable sacrifices.

“Jeez Char, what happened?” he said, turning towards her, “it like you… wait… really?!”

“What ‘really’?” said Charlie, completely unconvincingly, “I have no clue what you’re on about.”

“Uh huh,” said Aaron, “I’ll be honest, I’d drop it if I thought I was about to out something, but given that it looks like you two could could join the Olympic synchronized blushing team and there’s no one else around… spill.”

“But… no… there’s nothing… I—” Charlie was cut off by a hand on her shoulder.

“Char, the jig is up,” said Hazel, “we can trust him. Right?” She glared Aaron.

“Yeah, yeah. Absolutely,” he said, “though you’re gonna have get a wee bit more self-control or my silence will mean absolutely bupkis.”

Charlie shrank. “Duly noted.”

“So… when? how?”

“The other week in the car. She kissed me,” said Charlie, smiling softly at the memory.

“And?!” Aaron leaned forward.

“And I kissed her back.” Charlie added suspiciously.

“But like, was it a declaration of love? mutual pining? a chasm of deep regret?”

“Has anyone told you you’re a drama queen?” asked Hazel.

“Yes, stop dodging the question,” said Aaron.

“Well, the second kinda,” said Charlie, “not that I was watching her wistfully from afar, or anything.”

“Yeah,” said Hazel, “it was more of a ‘oh, that’s what that itch was’ rather than ‘at long last’.”

“That’s a terrible love story,” said Aaron, practically pouting.

“Well, that’s cause it’s not love,” said Charlie, “not yet, anyway. Give us some time, man.”

“Ugh… you people and your ‘real’ relationships,” groused Aaron.

“Yes, we are terrible people for approaching things healthily,” said Hazel.

“That’s what I’m saying. Glad we agree on that at least.” Aaron kept a serious expression for a few seconds before they all broke down into giggles. “I’m happy for you two, and I’ll keep your confidence as long as you need me to.”

“Thanks Aaron, it mean a lot,” said Charlie.

Aaron smiled. “Hey I’m your best friend,—”

x-x-x

“That’s what friends are for.”

Ruth smiled. “You have no idea how happy that makes me Mir” She stepped forward, pulling Carmilla into an uncharacteristic hug.

“Well, what else am I going to say? ‘Godparents? You’re crazy.’?”   
said Carmilla

“Well… the old Mir would’ve said that,” said Ruth.

“The old Mir would still be stalking innocent freshmen like she sparkled in sunlight, not happily married,” said Carmilla, “we’ve both changed, Stripes, for the better.”

“Isn’t that the truth?” said Ruth, her attention captured by the bassinet containing both a baby and a tiny snow leopard kitten, “I owe you so much.”

“Not really, you got yourself here,” said Carmilla.

“Not that… well, yes that, I never would have even considered the possibility of a happily ever after. Even after your Shih Tzu of a wife Monty Pythoned Maman, I still figured I was set for a life of slinking through the shadows of society, but I was talking about…” She paused, lost for words. She gestured to her children, giving Carmilla a sad look.

Carmilla realized what Ruth was referring to and immediately the tears started threatening.

“You gave Zeke what he needed to get me through this,” whispered Ruth, “but you paid such a high price for that knowledge. It’s a debt I can never repay, all I can do is thank you. You gave me my children.”

“There’s nothing to be repaid.” Carmilla wiped away tears. “I miss them. I never really knew them, but I miss them anyways. But I realized with Drix, I can’t see it as a matter of a price. I didn’t get my son at the cost of my heart being broken twice. What kind of burden is that to place on a child?”

Ruth nodded, gently stroking Hayden’s cheek as she slept.

“I love Drix, and I was overwhelmed with love and relief when he was born,” said Carmilla, “and the fact that the knowledge from that gave you your children safely makes me beyond happy. Besides, who knows, maybe these two made it on their second try.”

Ruth raised an eyebrow. “You’ve never been one to see things so spiritually before.”

“Eh, if I’m supposed to be a godmother, I suppose it comes with the territory,” said Carmilla, “though I’m not subjecting them to church, so don’t ask.”

Ruth scoffed. “Church? Do you think I want you to guide their faith to  _ that  _ god? No, these two will be raised in the flock of the dark god Azathoth.”

“Oh good,” said Carmilla, “a sensible choice.”

“I thought so,” said Ruth when her watch chimed softly.

“Feeding schedule?” asked Carmilla.

“Yep, making sure infant vamps stay healthy is not a task to take lightly,” said Ruth.

“Oh I remember well,” said Carmilla, “you gotta know when to feed them and when it’s time,—”

x-x-x

“It’s time.”

Sky’s head snapped up, staring at Mercy as she could feel a cold sweat break out all over her. “You sure?”

Mercy nodded, a hand resting on the swell of her stomach, “pretty sure, unless this is more of those Higgs Boson things.”

Sky chuckled in spite of herself. “Braxton Hicks. Well, try walking around, that’s gotten rid of them before.”

Mercy held her hands out with a yearning look. Sky couldn’t help but smile as she took Mercy’s hands to help her stand. Mercy smiled right back until she was fully standing when her eyes went wide and expression went slack.

“It’s real,” said Mercy, “my water just broke. Jeez, that felt weird.”

Sky had to fight to keep the rising panic down. “O...kay… okay. We’ve got a plan… we’ve got a plan. What was the plan?”

“Hospital?” asked Mercy, smirking at Sky’s lost expression.

“Right, the hospital. I’ll grab the overnight bag. Wait, did you want to change your pants? Do we have time to change your pants?

“Sky? Calm. It’s okay. Remember the classes, we’ve got hours to go yet… probably far too many of them.” Mercy hoped it wouldn’t be too long a wait. “If my water hadn’t broke, I’d say wait for my contractions to get closer, but the home waterpark kinda made the decision for us. I’m going to go change into some fresh clothes. You grab the bag and the bottles of water from the fridge.” Mercy waddled off down the hallway.

Sky scampered into the kitchen, taking deep breaths to try and calm down. Her heart was racing, it had never felt like this day would come, so actually being presented with it was beyond surreal.

“Y’know, I think the controlled breathing was meant to help me,” said Mercy, stepping into the kitchen in a simple maternity dress, having consigned her soiled leggings to the hamper, “should we call Drix and Aaron? See if they can give us a ride?”

“No!” exclaimed sky before taking one last long deep breath, “no, I’m fine, this is just a lot to take in. We’re ready. Let’s get going, I’ll drive and you can start calling people from the car.” Sky led the way to the front door, grabbing the prepacked overnight bag as they left. Before long they were in the car and on their way.

“Hi Mom,” said Mercy, setting her phone to speaker. She was shaking too much to properly hold it to her ear.

_ "Hi sweetie, how are you?" _ asked Danny over the line.

“Well… that’s kind of an interesting question,” said Mercy, smiling at Sky.

_ "Wait… really? Now?!” _  said Danny.

“Now-ish,” said Mercy, “if my water hadn’t broken, we’d still be kicking back waiting for more —hngh, there’s one— contractions.” Mercy winced at the dull pain.

_ "It’s time!!!!_ _ Okay, we’ll meet you at the hospital. I’ll call Sasha and tell her to be ready for you,” _ said Danny.

_ "Don’t forget to breathe!” _ came Laura’s voice suddenly. Mercy couldn’t help but smile at the image of her ripping the phone away from Danny.

“I won’t, Mom,” said Mercy, letting out a sigh of relief as the contraction passed, “though no rush, I doubt this is gonna be all that quick.

_ “Hmm… Sit at home while my first grandchild is being born, or go partake in the experience. Gee, decisions, decisions.” _

“Well, it’s your butt that’s gonna fall asleep,” said Mercy, “bring a sudoku.”

_ "Sudoku? No, it’s time for vlogging.” _

“Mom, I love you, but if you stick a camera in my face while I’m having a contraction, I will crush it in my bare hands,” said Mercy.

“Well, if it’s not my hand getting broken,” joked Sky, “c’mon in with that camera.”

Mercy shook her head. “Nah, I’ll just break your hand in my other hand.”

“I’m having doubts about this baby,” said Sky.

“Too bad, cause it’s coming —hngh— that was a lot closer,” said Mercy.

“I guess we’re not the only ones who moved up the timetable,” said Sky, turning into the hospital lot, “but we’re here so I guess sooner or later is fine.”

_ “Aaaaa! We need to hurry! See you soon sweetie!” _ said Laura before the line went dead.

“Alright, now your parents,” said Mercy, beginning to dial.

“No, no. Check in now, call parents later,” said Sky, lifting the phone from Mercy’s hands.

“Excuse me, I’m about to push a  _ person _ out of me, I’d like as much moral support as possible.”

“That’s fair, but I’d like you to have as much medical support as possible too,” said Sky, “we can call—”

Sky’s phone rang. It was Laf.

“Hello?” said Sky, holding the phone to her shoulder as she got the overnight bag out.

_ "We’re on our way," _ said Laf before hanging up.

“Well, that solves the moral support problem,” said Sky, staring at her phone a moment, “lets get in there.”

In the end, it took nearly an hour of forms and waiting to get into a room. Time enough for their families to arrive and Carmilla to have to be wrangled to keep from threatening the nursing staff. However, they were eventually set up into a private room overlooking the forest where they wiled away the next few hours.

“There’s something I hadn’t considered,” said Mercy, as she looked out the window.

“What?” asked Sky.

“The pack. I mean, I knew they’d be here, but I hadn’t really internalized that they’d be here for us. For him.” She smiled before her expression became thoughtful. “There’s another one. It’s only been a couple minutes.”

“Glad you got the epidural?” asked Sky.

Mercy nodded. “If I’m feeling them  _ through  _ it, I probably would not be a happy camper right now.

“Hello again Ms. Hollis,” said Dr. Antos as he walked in, “I imagine we’re probably about ready.”

“I hope so, I really don’t want this lovely concoction to wear off first,” said Mercy as Zeke worked.

“Well, you’re fortunate then; you’re fully dilated,” he said, “let’s get you to the delivery room.”

“Woo! Delivery time!” said Mercy as Sasha and an orderly began rolling her bed.

“Someone’s excited,” said Sasha,.

“Just trying to get pumped up,” said Mercy, “this is gonna be hard. Speaking of… Sky?”

“Oh right,” said Sky as she pulled her phone out, flipping over to the music app. She selected a track and heavy synth began playing.

“The Final Countdown?” asked Sasha.

“Can you think of a better song to hype for childbirth?” asked Mercy.

Sasha thought for a moment. “No. No I can’t”

“Exactly,” said Mercy as they reversed and backed into the delivery room.

The delivery passed in a whirl of activity. Mercy vaguely remembered some really hard work at some point, but it seemed a distant and unimportant memory compared to the small person she held in her arms.

“You did it,” said Sky, tugging Mercy’s gown to allow for more skin contact between her and the baby.

“Yeah, I can’t believe it,” said Mercy, “how’s your hand?”

“The woman who just gave birth is asking how  _ my _ hand is,” scoffed Sky.

“I had drugs to help. You didn’t before I mistook your fingers for a grip test mid-push,” said Mercy.

“I’ll live,” said Sky, wiggling her fingers, “a bit bruised at worst.”

“Can we come in yet? We’re dying out here!” called Laura from the hallway.

Sky and Mercy looked fondly at each other. “Yeah, come in.”

No sooner had they said it than the room was flooded with people.

“Ugh, no fair,” said Hazel, still very pregnant, “you’re the younger siblings, you should’ve had to wait for us.”

“Sorry,” said Mercy, “I’m afraid it was his call, not ours.”

“He’s quite big for a newborn” noted Perry, “are you doing okay sweetie?”

“I’ll probably be feeling it for a while, all nine pounds, four ounces worth, but I’m fine,” said Mercy.

“So…” said Drix, “you figured out what you’re gonna call him?”

Mercy and Sky shared another happy look.

“We have,” said Sky, “His name is—”

x-x-x

“ASHTON ZACHARY LAFONTAINE!”

“Whoop, that’s my cue to leave,” said Ashton, leaving his sisters behind as he bolted into the woods, shifting as he went.

He kept running until he hit the lakeshore, pretty certain he'd thrown the trail. With a whuff, he lay down at the water's edge and just watched the surface gently ripple.

“Well hello there weary traveller.”

Ashton jumped about five feet straight up, coming down into the shallows with a splash. He scanned the shore, trying to find the source of the voice before a whistle drew his attention to his Grandma Carmilla lounging on a branch above him. He woofed in annoyance before shaking himself off..

“Hey. All I said was ‘hello’, not ‘fling yourself into the cold water’,” she said, hopping down to the ground. “Well c'mon, let's go get you dry.” 

Ash shrank back a little, his tail between his legs.

“To our place,” she gave him a reassuring pat as they began walking, “I doubt there was a single member of the pack who missed your mom's little exclamation there. We'll just give her a bit of time to cool off.”

He barked, walking with a bit more bounce.

“Oh, don't be too thankful, she knows exactly where you are.” She held up her phone and he folded his ears back. “Oh don't act like that. Angry or not, she loves you and we're not going to make anything better by worrying her sick.”

He crooned a bit in accedence.

“Glad you agree, now you feel up to running? A brisk pace should help dry you and we can use a hair dryer to get the rest so you don't soak your clothes.”

He barked excitedly and she smirked before shifting into her panther, bounding off the moment her front paws touched the forest floor, Ashton very close behind. At full speed, it took only a few minutes to break into his Grandmas’ backyard.

As they approached the deck, Danny was waiting, leaning over the railing with a knowing smirk. “Ah, there’s the fugitive,” she said dryly.

“Lay off, Red,” said Carmilla as she shifted back, “is the hair dryer still in the mud room?”

“Yeah, take a bit of a dip, Ash?”

He lowered his head and yipped an affirmative as he followed Carmilla into the house.

A quick pass with the dryer and consequent conversion into a puffball later, Ash had transformed back and was now sitting at the kitchen island, a small mug of tea in hand.

“So you wanna talk about it?” asked Danny.

“I didn’t mean to do it!” said Ash

“Didn’t say you did, sport?” said Carmilla, “though you haven’t told us what ‘it’ is yet.”

“Well… Buba showed us this neat thing with grapes in the microwave,” said Ash, “they put half-grapes in and they flashed and sparked. It was really cool!”

“I think I see where this is going,” said Danny.

“Mama bought some grapes and I wanted to see it again,” said Ash.

“What colour were the grapes?”asked Carmilla.

“Purple,” he said.

“Did you cut the grapes?” 

“No.”

“And they exploded in the microwave?”

“Yeah.”

Danny laughed. “Yep, he’s a Lafontaine alright.”

“No kidding,” said Carmilla before looking back at Ash, “well, I don’t think your Mom is going to stay mad for very long, though I think you’re going to have to clean the microwave.”

“But it’s so high up!” he whined.

“Well, is it fair to make your Mom or Mama clean up a mess you made?” asked Danny.

He thought on that for a moment. “No…” he admitted, “I’ll clean it.”

“Good,” said Mercy as she slipped into the room and sat down by her son, wrapping an arm around him, “you can’t run off like that bud, you scared me.”

“Sorry, Mom.”

“I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t have yelled.” She hugged him close. “Though you’re still cleaning that microwave.”

He sank a little at that, but nodded anyways.

She ruffled his hair with a chuckle, making him laugh. “But don’t worry,—”

x-x-x

“I’ll give you a hand with it.”

“Thanks, Papa. This dress is beautiful, but flexible, it ain’t,” said Jaq, turning so he could reach where the veil had bunched up.

“There,” said Drix, “it was just caught on a bobby pin.” He stepped back as she turned to face him, pulling the veil so it properly draped over her left shoulder. “My goodness sweetie, you look beautiful. I wish your Dad could have been here to see this.”

“Stop telling people I’m dead!” said Aaron as he walked into the bridal tent.

“I swear I can almost hear his voice,” continued Drix, unabated.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” said Aaron, setting the grocery bag on the table in the corner, “alright I’ve got water and snacks.”

Jaq bit her lip. “Thanks Dad, but—”

“But nothing,” interrupted Aaron, “I know the nervousness means that the last thing you want to think about is food. Trust me, I remember.”

“And how!” said Drix, “this poor guy nearly fainted walking down the aisle.”

“And you know why?” said Aaron, “because I hadn’t had anything to eat or drink since the day before. I am not letting my little girl’s wedding get ruined by an impromptu faceplant.”

“I… thanks Dad. I am thirsty.”

He pulled out a bottle of water, plunking a straw into the top. “Now don’t worry, I’ve got nothing here that can stain, even if you spill it. Some water, some nuts and some crackers. It’s basic, but it should take the edge off until we can feed our faces off in the reception.”

**_Who-who!_ **

Aaron looked at the owl perched on the chair in the corner. “Sorry Levy, they were fresh out of rodents.”

She turned her head upside down, chirping.

“Yes, really. Besides, I don’t want to think what kind of stains they would leave,” said Aaron.

“Ugh, fine,” said Levy, shifting out of her owl form to reveal her deep purple maid-of-honour dress, “how long until we’re ready to go?”

Drix peeked out the tent flap. “People are still milling about, so not too long.”

“Pops?” said Levy, “there’s no seating. They’ll be milling about regardless.”

“Oh… right…” said Drix, “well then I have no clue.”

Jaqueline nibbled on a handful of cashews. “We don’t have to worry about it. Auntie Perry will come and get us when it’s time.”

As if summoned, Perry strode into the tent, clipboard in hand. “Alright, we’re almost there! Everybody ready?”

“Wait, I forgot to get bridesmaids!” joked Jaq.

“It’s fine!” said Levy, “Hayden forgot them too. You’ll still match.”

“Oh, ok. We’re good!” said Jaq.

Perry gave them an admonishing grin before continuing. “So Levy, you’ll go in first and meet Aero in the middle, just to the side of the dias. Then Jaq, wait for the music cue and then you and Hayden will meet right in the centre.”

“Five bucks says Hayden sees her and immediately trips because she’s so enamoured,” said Levy.

“You’re on,” said Aaron.”

“Ahem!” interjected Perry, looking at Aaron, “and of course, you and Hendrix will walk beside her. Your seats once you get to the middle are part of the group of five straight to your left, alongside Ruth, Ava and Scout.”

“Aunt Perr, we did rehearse this last night,” said Drix.

“I know,” said Perry, “I just want this to be perfect.”

“I’m marrying Hayden,” said Jaq wistfully, “it’s already perfect. The rest is icing.”

“Well, in that case,” said Perry, stashing the clipboard under her arm, “I think we’re ready to go. Let’s get this show on the road.” She swept out of the tent.

Levy popped one last nut into her mouth before grabbing the lilac bouquet from the table. “You ready, Jackie?”

“You better believe it, Le-le.”

“That’s what I like to hear,” said Levy as the music started up. She flashed a smile at Jaq one more time before pushing out of the tent.

“Well Dad? Papa? Any sage advice?” asked Jaq.

“Nope,” said Drix with a warm smile, “you love her. The rest comes naturally.”

Aaron hooked her arm. “Though make the bed from time to time. They love nonsense like that,” he said, prompting an ear flick from Drix. “Ow!”

Jaq laughed. “I’ll keep that in mind.” The music changed and she stiffened. “I guess there’s only one thing to do now.”

Drix took her other arm. “You’ve got this,—

x-x-x

“You just take it one step at a time.”

Perry hugged Sky close, struggling to keep her own composure as her daughter was wracked with sobs. Mercy stood shoulder to shoulder with Sky as Laura rubbed her back. Next to them, Xavier stood weeping in the arms of his mother and sister. His father, understandably, was absent. This much grief may well have killed him.

The weather seemed wrong to Sky. It was too sunny for such an occasion. It should be raining on a day like today, overcast at the very least, not a beautiful summer day filled with birdsong. It made the memorial seems farcical

“I don’t want to take any steps. This isn’t fair,” said Sky, “this didn’t have to happen. Why did this happen?”

“I don’t know, sweetie,” said Perry.

“Some people are attached to their mortality,” said Laura. She had a distant look in her eyes, like she was remembering something… or someone, “it gives their life meaning. Whether it’s something to measure themselves against, or someone to get back to.”

“He didn’t have anyone to ‘get back to’” snapped Mercy, “he had us here, he had  _ his husband _ here. What could be so important as to do this to us?”

“Mercy, it’s alright.”

Their little group turned towards Xavier. His face was streaked with tears, but he was smiling a little.

“How’s it alright?” Mercy asked, the anger completely drained from her voice.

“This is something we talked about for years. He never felt right taking the serum, and I had to respect that. It wasn’t easy for me, but I made my peace with it decades ago,” said Xavier, “we only had a limited time, so we made the most of it.”

“Well said, Dad,” said his daughter, Fiona, as she came up and took his hand, “can you maybe come talk to Ben? I think he need to see that his Grandpa is doing alright.”

“Well, alright is probably stretching it,” said Xavier, “but a good cry together would probably help the both of us.” He looked to his friends. “Can you excuse me?”

Sky nodded. “Of course.”

They watched him cross the lawn where a young boy was waiting. Before long, Xavier had him wrapped up in a hug as they shared their grief.

“That’s not a bad idea,” said Laura, “let’s find everyone else.”

“I think Danny set out some blankets over there for everyone to rest,” said Perry, starting to lead Sky in that direction. 

Sky however hung back. “You all go ahead, I need a moment.”

Her mom and Laura nodded. Mercy hesitated a moment longer but a reassuring hand squeeze let her know it was okay to move ahead. Once Sky was alone, she turned back to the pedestal where a simple urn sat. She stood there quietly, contemplating. 

After a moment, she let the tears flow once more, though these felt more peaceful, holding less pain. She stepped forward, running her fingers down the side. “Thanks for the dance, Rodney. I’ll miss you.”

Pulling her hand back, she turned to go join her own family where they sat. The grandkids were quietly playing and eating some fruit Charlie had thought to bring. She smiled at their innocence of the occasion when she felt a tug at her hand.

“Gramma? Are you sad?”

“I am Sylvia,” she said, kneeling down, “my best friend died.”

Sylvia seemed to need a moment to process that before she stepped forward and wrapped her little arms around Sky’s neck. “I sorry.”

Sky returned the hug. “Thank you, sweetie. That means a lot.”

“Can we play?” she asked.

“Oh, honey,” said Serena, “I think we’d better let Grandma rest.”

Sky stood up. “No, no. It’s fine. —”

x-x-x

“I think I could use something to lighten my mood.”

Hazel winced. “That bad a day, huh?”

Charlie screamed into a pillow before looking at her wife. “No fewer than three ancient urns broke in transit on the way to the museum. The appraiser I hired doesn’t know the difference between Babylon and Assyria and the next intern to ask me how to transfer files between tablets is going to get launched out a window!”

“A simple yes would have sufficed,” said Hazel, gently prying Charlie’s hands from the cushion before she ripped it in two.

“I don’t know what to do. Everyday, it’s the same thing. Book new things in for display, archive the old, tell off that old bat who comes in everyday and insists we’ve got the roman column upside-down,” ranted Charlie.

“Old bat?” said Hazel, “given you probably have a decade on her that’s a bold statement.”

Charlie scoffed. “Pah, even if I looked my age, I’m nowhere near bitter enough to carry that title.”

“This current rant suggests otherwise,” needled Hazel.

“I…” Charlie started to protest before her face went slack. “Well, it’s official. I’m old. Get me a shawl, a cup of tea and some kids on the lawn to yell at.”

“Well, I wouldn’t go that far,” said Hazel, “but it might be time for a change of scenery.”

“How so?”

“Well, you’ve been doing the curator thing for… I don’t even know how long. Since before I had Trystan at least,” said Hazel.

“Well, I’ve worked for different museums,” said Charlie.

“But in practically the same job, for decades,” said Hazel, “what I’m saying is… it might be time to quit?”

“Quit? And do what?” asked Charlie.

“I dunno. Maybe a small change like work at an art gallery or maybe a big one like making use of that archaeology degree and actually going far and wide to do some digging of your own. Like you did on that internship to… I want to say Italy?”

“Greece, and that went so well for us last time,” noted Charlie.

“Very true, but what is also true is that I could also use a change of pace,” said Hazel, “university laboratories get kinda samey, even when you’re discovering new things to break the universe with.”

“So… you’d come with me?” said Charlie.

“I’d come with you. I could carbon date things for you,” said Hazel, “or maybe just be the expedition groupie.”

“Expeditions don’t get groupies,” said Charlie.

“This one would!” declared Hazel, wrapping her arms around Charlie’s neck.

“But seriously, is this something we want to do?” asked Charlie, “this would be a massive step. Being cut off from the family would be weird.”

“For a certain degree of cut off. We’re a long way from ‘I hope this missive reaches you well’. Everyone is just a vid call away,” said Hazel.

“Wow… this idea has legs. I think we should do it,” said Charlie, “we’re going to go around the world. I don’t know where to start.”

“Well, maybe with your two weeks notice and then we’ll go from there,” said Hazel, “we don’t have to rush it.”

“This is gonna be fun, said Charlie, “we can be those grandparents who are always someplace different. Sending postcards. Wish you were here in Estonia. Visit beautiful Mongolia.—”

x-x-x

“Greetings from Morocco!”

“Mattie?! What in the hell are you doing here?” Carmilla ran across the room and threw herself into her sister’s embrace.

“Also,” said Laura with a suspicious smile, “how’d you come in? The door was locked.”

“I picked the lock, darling,” said Mattie, “you’d be surprised what random skills you pick up to keep yourself amused during an immortal lifetime.”

Laura glanced at the new oil painting on the wall. “Yeah, that scans.”

“So, what brings our favourite vampiric terror by?” asked Danny.

“What about me?” Carmilla pouted as she flopped back down on the couch.

“Kitty kat, even when you were ‘evil’ you were about as terrifying as a dust bunny,” said Mattie, “now you’re squishier than a giant teddy bear.”

“I am  _ not _ squishy,” said Carmilla.

Laura leaned over on the couch and wrapped her arms around Carmilla. “Aww, Carm.”

Carmilla instinctively swung her arm around Laura’s back to pull her closer, unknowingly giving Laura the opportunity to drop her face right onto Carmilla’s boobs.

“Yep, pretty squishy. Sorry Carm,” Laura said in a muffled voice.

Carmilla playfully shoved Laura away, giving her a mock glare.

Mattie rolled her eyes. “You think time would have tempered that,” she muttered.

“Nope,” said Danny, “so what’s up?”

“Well, I’ve come by to celebrate!” said Mattie, “it’s a very auspicious day.”

“It is?” asked Laura, “I feel like I missed something.”

“Well obviously you did, my dear,” said Mattie, “because it was today, one hundred years ago, that you, my little moppet, dropped a rock on our mother and kitty kat here decided stabbing a demon was a stellar life choice.”

“Well, considering that decision ended up with me here”—Carmilla gestured to her wives—”after a brief week long nap under some rocks, I’d say under the tally of life choices, it goes into the ‘pro’ column.”

Mattie laughed heartily. “I suppose it was, all things considered.”

“I have to say, I’m surprised you’re the one reminding us of this,” said Laura, “after I Wile E. Coyote’d your mother, your first instinct was give me and my bones a trial separation.”

“Very true. It just took me a little longer to figure out I was truly free of her than Carmilla here,” said Mattie, “side effect of lacking that rebellious instinct.”

“You still figured it out faster than a lot of them,” said Carmilla, “I had to kill too many of our sibs that came gunning for us. I’m glad you weren’t among them.”

“As am I,” said Mattie before reaching into her bag and pulling out a bottle of champagne, “but now’s not the time to ruminate on such things. Would one of you lovelies please fetch some glasses?”

“On it!” said Danny, running to get their good champagne flutes.

“Wait… is that?” asked Carmilla.

“The very same vintage that you brought for the cub scout here on your very first kidnapping,” said Mattie.

“But… how?” said Carmilla.

“You weren’t the only one who had access to Mother’s wine cellar, dear,” said Mattie, “Maman bought at least a case of this one.”

“That vintage was pricey when we were at Silas,” said Laura, “I can’t imagine what it’s worth with another century under the label.”

“That’s the best part,” said Mattie, popping the cork with utmost control, “somewhere there is a wine collector crying because this bottle is being opened and enjoyed rather than sitting under glass for eternity.”

“I’ll drink to that,” said Carmilla.

“You’re supposed to have the glass in hand before you say that, babe,” teased Danny as she put the flutes on the coffee table where Mattie filled them up.

“Okay,” said Laura, “now.”

“Ahem, I’ll drink to that,” repeated Carmilla.

“Hear hear” said Danny as they all took a sip.

“Ooh that is lovely,” said Mattie.

“I’ll say. I was way too young to appreciate that first bottle, but I still remember it and the years have really added to it,” said Laura.

“Wait, really?” said Carmilla.

“Shh… I’m trying to appear wisened,” said Laura.

“It’s going to take more than that, moppet,” said Mattie with a smile, “but good try.”

Laura pouted.

“Now, thanks to your lovely children, I’ve arranged for you three to have the next couple days off. I’ve booked restaurant and hotel reservations in the city. I’ve even commissioned some marvelous outfits for you to wear and we are going to have a roaring good evening of it,” said Mattie, “all I need you three to do is pack some overnight bags.”

Carmilla, Laura and Danny shared impressed looks.

“That sounds great,” said Laura, “me and Danny will go grab some clothes. Carm, the carry-on will probably be the best choice. You know the drill.”

“On it!” said Carmilla, heading for the hall closet.

Mattie looked at her curiously, following after “What’s the drill, may I ask?”

“Oh, just we keep the luggage behind my collection, so it’s my job to haul it out.” Carmilla opened the closet, revealing a wall of boxes labelled ‘Damn Heavy! Leave for Vampire’

“Collection of what?” asked Mattie, staring at the boxes.

“Hi, have we met?” said Carmilla, blindly reaching behind the boxes, “books, of course.”

Mattie goggled at the pile taller than her. “Have you heard of shelves?”

“All my shelves are full, these are the overflow,” said Carmilla. She stopped trying to reach blindly and started pulling boxes down. She paused mid lift when she caught Mattie’s incredulous expression. “What?”

“You… have too many books.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One hundred chapters! One hundred weeks. We made it! It still feels like yesterday that I was sitting bored in the ER (collapsed lung, that was a weird day), writing the very first chapter, Running Gag, just to see if I could do it.
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this extra long (for me) update and I'm not done yet. I already have an idea in the queue for the two year anniversary next month, so we're gonna keep on rolling.
> 
> As always, major shout out to Jessi for letting me play in her sandbox. I never woulda even thought of doing something like this if she hadn't set the stage. Thank you, Jess!
> 
> And thanks to you all for sticking with me! I love you guys!


	101. Such A Wholesome Place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just an ordinary afternoon at home.

_“Cruella de Vil… Cruella de Vil… If she doesn't scare you… No evil thing will…”_

_“_ Really, Laura?” asked Danny.

Laura jumped, throwing a suds-covered mixing bowl into the air. Danny reached out and caught the bowl as it sailed over Laura's head, but not before the water within spilled out, soaking both of them.

“Gah, Danny! Don’t sneak up on me!” Laura flicked water off her hands, which did nothing to dry off her sodden shirt.

“I wasn’t sneaking anywhere,” said Danny, “I came in and dumped an armload of grocery bags on the counter. You were too distracted with your singing, which I will repeat… really?”

“What?”

“A song about a villian who thought it was a good idea to make coats out of puppies? Around… a puppy?” said Danny, pointing at Mercy who was on the living floor with Drix, nosing a ball back and forth between them.

“They wanted to watch the movie earlier and it’s a catchy song,” said Laura, “and besides, it’s a song about what a horrible person she is.”

“Well, I suppose,” said Danny, “though if Mercy’s up tonight trying to reenact the twilight bark, you’re the one that gets to drag her inside and get her back to sleep.”

“Deal,” said Laura, “right after I help her perfect the code. What was it? Two woofs, one yip and a woof?”

“Sorry? What’s this about puppies?” asked Carmilla as she came in. She grinned at Danny’s glower.

“You both know very well that doesn’t actually say ‘puppies’. It doesn’t say anything,” said Danny, “it’s all in the intonation.”

“Y’see, that’s always the trouble I have with learning languages,” said Laura, “I could never get past ‘parlour voose frankays’.”

It was Carmilla’s turn to glower before turning to Danny. “She’s being really punchy today. Did you forget to put the cookies away on a high shelf?”

“I’m an adult and can buy cookies whenever I want,” said Laura, snagging a cookie from a nearby drawer and biting into it, before immediately spitting it into the sink, “bleh, rinse soapy hands, then eat cookie.”

“You really ought to eat better,” said Danny.

“Are you calling me fat?” teased Laura.

“Yep,” said Carmilla.

Laura’s face scrunched up. “I always knew this day would come.” She grabbed a wooden spoon from the utensil jar before holding it like a stake and walking towards Carmilla.

Danny came up behind her picked her up bridal style. “No, you’re not fat, case in point.” She easily bounced Laura a few times, eliciting a giggle past the fake scowl she was trying to keep up. “Actually, this is kinda fun. Hey Carm? Wanna play catch?”

“Eh, not in here, we could break something,” said Carmilla. “like a dish, the table… our wife.”

“Aww, you do care,” said Laura, reaching out for a hug.

Carmilla rolled her eyes, but moved in for the hug anyways.

“Aha, fool!” exclaimed Laura, clamping her arms around Carmilla’s head.

Carmilla remained calm as her head became ensconced in a tiny, gay cocoon.

“Uh,” came her muffled voice as she raised a finger, “little help.”

“Sorry Fangs, no hands free,” said Danny.

“Oh right, one sec.” Carmilla’s arms cradled Laura and lifted her free of Danny’s embrace, “how ‘bout now?”

“On it,” said Danny as she began prying gently at Laura’s arms, “c’mon Laura. Your wife needs her head back.”

“No, mine,” said Laura, redoubling her grip, “need it for kisses.” She peppered the exposed top of Carmilla’s head with kisses in demonstration.

“Hmmm… she makes a compelling argument,” said Danny, “Carm, your rebuttal.”

“You’re mashing my face into your chest… and not even the good parts of it,” said Carmilla, “so I’m not in a great place to give really good kisses at the moment.”

“Oh, well why didn’t you say so?” said Laura, relinquishing her vice grip on Carmilla and tilting her head up for a smooch.

Carmilla instead licked Laura across her face.

Laura recoiled and laughed. “Ew! Carm!”

“What? No good?”

“Speaking as an outside observer,” said Danny, “your technique could use some work.”

“Huh, any tips?” asked Carmilla.

“Well…” Danny leaned in, guiding Carmilla’s face with a hand, and softly touched her lips to Carmilla’s.

After a moment they deepened the kiss, gently letting their lips move against one another before parting with just the slightest gasp. They both looked at Laura who was looking between the two of them with a stricken expression of yearning.

Danny coughed. “Alright, so now you try.”

Carmilla leaned in towards Laura, who’d closed her eyes in anticipation… and licked her again.

“Nope, still not working,” lamented Carmilla.

“Hmmm…” mused Danny.

“Alright, if one of you doesn’t kiss me properly in the next twenty seconds...” said Laura before pointing at the kids, “I am going to fill them up with as much sugar and caffeine as I can get my hands on and then call Elsie and go out for drinks.”

“I dunno, what do you think?” asked Carmilla.

“Well, she’s demonstrated an startling capacity for acquiring sweets on her own, she might be serious,” said Danny.

“...fifteen, sixteen, seven—” Laura got cut off as Carmilla finally brought their lips together, properly this time. Laura snaked her arms back around Carmilla’s neck as she indulged in the kiss. She purred lightly as Carmilla pulled away. “Mmm… now that’s more like it… though something is still missing.”

“Music,” said Danny, “I’ll go put on some 80s hair metal.”

“Oh get over here,” said Laura, managing to grab Danny’s sleeve to pull her into a kiss as well.

“Mmmm,” hummed Danny into the kiss, “what do you suppose the chances of us foisting the kids off on Laf and Perry for a few hours are?”

“Well, considering we’ve been hosting Trudy while they’re out of town, enduring family, I think pretty small,” said Carmilla, “depends if Laf has managed to ‘accidentally’ glue that windbag of a father-in-law’s mouth shut.”

“Oh yeah,” said Danny, “where is she anyways?”

“Charlie took her for a walk,” said Laura.

“You let our seven-year-old go out by herself?” asked Danny..

“What? No,” said Laura, pointing out the window, “she just wanted to take Trudy on her leash around the yard. I think it’s kind of a novelty, since she can’t do that with you or Mercy.”

“Uh-huh,” said Danny, watching as Charlie walked along the treeline, Trudy trundling along happily enough at her heel.

“Speaking of walking,” said Laura, “can you put me down now?”

“Huh? Oh yeah, sure,” said Carmilla, gently letting Laura to the floor, “aw, cupcake. You got me all wet.” Carmilla picked at her shirt where the soapy water had soaked over from Laura's shirt.

“Really Carm? In front of the kids?” said Laura with false disappointment and a salacious grin.

“Wait, what? Laura, no,” said Carmilla, facepalming, “y'know what? I'm going to call Elsie. Fill _her_ up with sugar and caffeine and then go out with the kids.”

Laura's eyes widened. “I'll be good.”

“Don't think that'd work anyhow, what with Elsie being four months pregnant,” said Danny, “that much caffeine…”

“Ooh, right. Good point,” said Carmilla, “alright, I'll get Kirsch and tell him you _really_ need cheering up. Have him bring over some stout.”

“You fight dirty,” said Laura.

“It's a gift.”

“Actually, having him and Betty over… and Elsie and Hunter to think of it, actually kinda sounds fun right now,” mused Danny.

“I was actually joking…” said Carmilla.

“Oh, you love ‘em,” said Laura, snuggling up to Carmilla, getting her shirt even more wet.

“I am… somewhat fond of them,” admitted Carmilla.

“Translation: would move mountains for them,” joked Danny.

Carmilla narrowed her eyes at Danny. “Alright, well it was your idea, so you get to go to the store to grab some non-alcoholic beer. Elsie will complain all night if she feels left out.”

“Well, actually,” said Laura, “you were the one who suggested invit—”

“Yep, Danny’s idea. I’m gonna go check the freezer to see if we have enough chicken to go round,” said Carmilla, exiting the room before her wives could get another word in.

They both chuckled.

“Why don’t I go call ‘em to extend our invitation,” said Laura, “and you can go get that beer.”

“Deal,” said Danny, as she went to go change into a dry shirt.

x-x-x

Danny woke with a start. At first, she didn’t know why but as she came to her senses, she began to hear what had woken her up.

Somewhere outside was a series of yowls and snarls. Vaguely feline, but too low to be one of the neighbourhood cats. With a groan, she prodded her wives.

“Whaisit?” asked Laura.

“Listen,” said Danny.

The three listened intently in the dark at the strange sound.

“Two yowls, two meows and a yowl,” said Carmilla, who chuckled in spite of her fatigue, “,‘puppies’.”

Laura groaned, knowing exactly what, or rather who, it was. “Alright, I showed them the movie. I’ll go bring him inside.” She got out of bed and tossed on her housecoat, shuffling out the door.

“I should probably be mad he’s trying to ‘twilight bark’,” said Carmilla, “far too much canine influence.”

“Oh you love us,” said Danny as they got back under the covers.

“Yeah, I do,” said Carmilla as she drifted off to the sound of Drix’s mewls as Laura coaxed him back into the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how does one followup a big, emotional rollercoaster milestone chapter? Why with fluff and banter, of course.
> 
> Not much else to say. Hope you enjoyed it!


	102. Bump in the Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A scream wakes up the residents of the Summers' lodge.

“Eeeeeeeek!”

The cry echoed through the Summer's lodge, breaking the peaceful silence of the night.

“Really? Eek?” complained Mel to no one in particular as she left her room and began sluggishly padding down the hall towards the source of the noise, “I mean, if you're gonna scream in terror at least project a little. Push from the diaphragm. We're Summers for Artemis’ sake, not debutantes.”

As she shuffled along, other girls were poking their heads out of their rooms. “Wuzgoinon,” mumbled Elsie, rubbing her eyes.

“Dunno, that’s what I’m trying to figure out,” said Mel, “though it better be good.”

“Came from down the hall,” drowsed Elsie, “maybe one of Danny’s side pieces.”

“Excuse you,” said Carmilla, seemingly materializing out the dark, “we’re a little more than side pieces. Plus, it wasn’t us. Came from back this way somewhere.”

“Well, I figured it wasn’t any of you,” said Mel, “I’d have been woken up by an entirely different type of scream.”

Carmilla took the opportunity to look smug. “I’m not apologizing for that, in case you were looking for one.”

“Please don’t, it’ll shatter the veneer of deniability I have built up,” said Mel, “so if you heard it this way and us, that, then that puts it at either Amanda or Hilary.”

“Or both.” Elsie nudged Mel playfully.

“Veneer of deniability,” repeated Mel through gritted teeth.

“Nngh,” said a far less awake Danny as she walked up, “nah, they’re pretty quiet.”

“How considerate,” muttered Mel.

“Veneer of deniability,” parroted Elsie.

“But,” Danny interrupted before Mel could throttle the infuriating blonde, “it wasn’t them. They’re both on the late patrol tonight with Annie. They said they were checking up on something in the northern woods while the harpies were asleep.”

“Right, but that means…” Mel looked towards the two shut doors. “...that I’m getting my bow.”

“Helga or Florence?” asked Elsie.

“Florence, of course,” said Mel as she wandered away, “I don’t have near enough room to fully draw Helga in here.”

“Do we really need firepower?” asked Danny, “I mean we’ve already got a short, unholy ball of wrath who’ll pull a threat to pieces… and Carm’s pretty good in a scrap too.”

“Where is the littlest member of your little company anyhow?” asked Elsie, “usually she’s the first one to—”

The soft creak of a door opening made them whip around to see Laura quietly sneaking into Hilary’s room.

“Yeah, that,” said Elsie as Danny and Carmilla scrambled after their girlfriend.

“Laura, what are you doing?” said Carmilla.

“Investigating, of course.” Laura pressed on into the empty room.

Nothing inside seemed out of sorts. The bed was neatly made, the desk was covered in tidy piles of books and paperwork and a small lamp kept the room dimly lit with a warm glow.

“Hmmm… nothing in here,” said Laura.

“Great, can you please stop snooping my sister’s room?” said Danny.

“Sure. Just have to look in the other one too,” said Laura.

“Laura, no,” said Danny, bundling Laura into a hug, “I know you wanna go have a look, but you’re still a guest here. You can’t just go barging in.”

Laura scrunched her face up. “...Fine. You’re right. Though I still maintain the right to be a hypocrite to break into corporate sleaze-baron’s things.”

“I honestly didn’t expect any different,” said Danny.

“Alright, so what we got?” said Mel, returning with a recurve short bow.

“Hilary’s is clear, haven’t been in Amanda’s,” said Danny.

“Really? Why?” asked Mel.

“Dan’ actually managed to convince Laura snooping is wrong… belatedly,” said Elsie.

“Damn, well so much for the decoy.” said Mel, nocking an arrow as she stepped up to Amanda’s door.

“Hey,” whined Laura, “I mean, fair. But still…”

“Shhh,” chastised Mel as she quietly turned the knob and pushed the door open with her shoulder, sweeping her aim across the room.

Like Hilary’s room, Amanda’s walked the line between tidy and buried that belied the student owner, except perhaps the bed was a little too neat. One might say, unused. However, the most notable thing in the room was the translucent form of a little girl in flannel pyjamas, standing in the middle of the room.

“Oh great,” said Mel, aiming right for her.

The little girl turned at the sound with a scared look on her face. “There’s a monster under the bed.” Her voice had a vaguely distant sound to it, like it was echoing in a cave.

“Yeah, monster under the bed. Sure,” said Mel.

“There is!” insisted the girl, “it tried to eat me.”

“All I’m seeing is some creepy little girl standing in a room that isn’t hers,” said Mel.

“B-but, this is my room. Why are you b-b-being so mean to me?” She started crying.

Laura started to move forward. “Aw, swee—”

There was a twang and thunk as Mel loosed an arrow which gouged into the floorboards at the girl’s feet. “Try again. And forget the waterworks, you’re in the wrong lodge for that nonsense.” Mel fluidly nocked another arrow, her gaze never shifting.

Laura stared at Mel, completely appalled. She tried to continue forward when Carmilla caught her by the wrist, giving Laura a quick shake of the head. “Give it a sec. Something is up here.”

“That is a child,” hissed Laura.

As if prompted, the little girl spoke again. “But I’m small and alone and need help.” The voice was plaintive, though there was an edge to it now.

“Lawrence, I think we need a better scent about what’s going on.” said Mel.

Danny perked up. With a nod to Laura and Carmilla, she stepped into the room, shifting so that she was standing at Mel’s hip.

Immediately, the little girl’s demeanour changed, all pretense of distress fell away. “Well, that changes things,” said the girl in a voice a great deal older than it had been a moment ago.

Mel raised an eyebrow. “It certainly does… now what are you doing here.”

“Chasing my quarry,” she said, “childish as it sounds, it has taken up refuge under the bed here.” The girl got down on all fours and turned her attention.

“You’re chasing the Bogeyman?” asked Laura.

“I’ve always preferred ‘babau’, but you’re otherwise correct.”

“So how did it get in here?” asked Mel, finally relaxing her draw, “how did  _ you  _ get in here for that matter?”

The girl gave Mel a deadpan look before simply putting her hand through a chair. Carmilla snickered behind her.

“Ok fine,” said Mel, “but we still need context here. All we know is here is you.”

Danny whuffed softly before turning back to the bed, her nose twitched rapidly as she sniffed the odd scent coming from underneath.

“Good. So we know that much is true at least,” said Mel.

“You think I’d lie?” she asked.

“I don’t even know your name and little ghost girl is the start of too many horror stories,” said Mel.

“Well, if it helps, I’m not technically dead. Just cursed,” said the girl, “and you can call me Thea.”.

“Cursed, by one of those things?” asked Laura.

“By one of them, yes,” she said, “they’re normally just dream-eaters, eat a good dream, kid has a nightmare.”

“Wait… they’re the cause of nightmares?” asked Laura.

Thea looked oddly at Laura. “Not as a concept, it’s just a symptom.”

“Back to the curse,” said Mel.

“When I was young, I awoke and went looking for the cause of my dream. When I cornered it, rather than fleeing, the babau drained me directly. It died for having eaten what was essentially poison, I was left a nearly literal shadow of myself.”

“And so at the tender age of ten, you swore revenge on all bogeymen and began a campaign to wipe them out,” said Laura.

“...no,” she said, “you really have an obsession with the dramatic.”

“Not really,” said Carmilla, showing off her fangs, “it’s just more par for the course around here.”

“What an odd place,” Thea mused.

“So spoke the incorporeal bogeyman hunter,” Carmilla replied.

She laughed. “Well said. I seek out those behaving oddly before they can pose a similar threat. Usually, it’s just a matter of chasing them off so they get back to their normal patterns.”

“But this isn’t usual,” stated Mel.

“No. This one won’t move on. It’s scared and lashing out. I sympathize with it, but it’s like a bear that eats garbage. I needed to… deal with it, before the bed’s owner came back.”

“Well, you would’ve had plenty of time to work,” joked Elsie, drawing a glare from Mel, “got it, shutting up.”

Mel turned back. “So why scream? Why not just do the dirty work and move on?”

Thea stuck her hand through the chair again.

“Ah,” said Mel.

“I find the ‘help the little ghost move on’ routine usually gets the help I need most of the time. I’m not used to places quite so supernaturally attuned.”

“That’s honestly pretty clever,” said Carmilla, “use people’s stupid against them.”

“Well, I’m certainly not keen on having something like that snacking on my sisters or making them, no offense, like you,” said Mel.

“None taken. I wouldn’t have volunteered for this.”

“What do we need to do?” asked Mel.

“It’s fairly simple, it needs darkness. A bright flash of light will essentially evaporate it. I find a camera usually works,” Thea said.

“Wait, wait, wait!” said Laura, finally forcing her way to the forefront of the conversation. Mel groaned, which Laura ignored. “Is killing it really necessary?”

“There’s not really any other way to deal with them,” said Thea, “if they dig in there is no physical way to force them out. They simply become desperate enough to bite.”

“Bite… wait, can they get too weak to move?” asked Laura.

“Yes, if they don’t get enough to eat.” She looked at Laura, wondering where she was going with this.

“So if one’s been waiting for a meal under an unused bed…” Laura looked to Mel, who couldn’t help but smirk.

“But if it were merely lack of prey, it’d move on before that point. Without people around, it’d find an active space.”

“Well, the space  _ is  _ active. Amanda still uses the room… just not the bed,” jeered Elsie.

“That… just might be enough to confuse it, especially if it was hungry,” she said.

“So, we might be able to help it along with a meal?” asked Laura.

The girl nodded.

Laura grinned and turned to Mel. “You think Amanda would mind if I borrowed her bed tonight?”

“Laura, no,” said Carmilla.

“Why not?” said Laura, “sounds like it’s perfectly harmless if not directly provoked.”

Thea raised an eyebrow. “If you count nightmares as harmless.”

“I do,” said Laura, “I can tell you from experience that they can be pretty useful actually.”

“Well, if you’re willing, it seems reasonable to try,” said Thea.

“If you’re the one taking the gamble, I have no issue,” said Mel, “I’ll let Amanda know she’s been evicted for the night.”

“She’ll be so heartbroken,” said Elsie.

“I don’t like this,” said Carmilla.

“Ditto,” said Danny.

Laura patted them both on the shoulder. “Well, you’ll like it even less cause you’re both going back to Danny’s room.”

“What?” said Danny.

“I doubt this thing will feed with other people about,” said Laura.

“That is not inaccurate,” agreed Thea.

“Alright, fine,” said Danny, “but you know where to find us if you need us.”

“Just scream,” said Carmilla.

“Though a little more impressively than the last one,” said Mel, “I refuse to be woken up by another ‘eek’. You need a place to sleep, Thea?”

“I could use a nap, but beds mean little when I can fall through them. I’ll curl up on the ground floor,” said Thea.

“Suit yourself,” said Mel, “I’ll leave the nighty night to you three, I’m going back to bed.”

“Me too, enjoy your monster feeding,” said Elsie.

“Alright, seriously let us know if you need something,” said Carmilla.

“I will,” said Laura, “I’ll see you two in the morning.”

“Sleep well,” said Danny.

x-x-x

“Sleep well?” asked Elsie as she sat down at the breakfast table.

“I’m fine,” said Carmilla, “I think Cupcake is a little worse for wear.”

Laura was clinging onto Carmilla for dear life, like she was afraid the vampire would disappear. Danny was next to her, stroking her hair to try and provide some comfort.

“So interesting dreams then?” asked Elsie.

“The Lustig. All over again,” said Laura.

“Oh jeez,” Elsie said, “say no more. Please. I don’t want to think about that night.”

“Well, if it helps,” said Thea from the doorway, “your idea worked. The babau moved on with a little coaxing. It still seemed a bit scared. which makes sense in this place, but it’s got its strength back.”

“Well that’s good,” said Laura, hugging Carmilla all the tighter, “means we didn’t have to try again.”

“Or resort to less pleasant options,” said Thea, “but my work is done here and it is high time for some leisure, so I am going to take my leave. Take care and thank you all.”

“Safe journey,” said Mel as Thea walked through the wall. “I’m impressed, Hollis. You stepped up without the slightest hesitation. Truly behaviour worthy of the summers.”

“Are… are you inviting me to join?” asked Laura.

Mel snorted. “Oh, god no. I think we’d both end up killing each other. Plus I don’t think being a hunter would really be your cup of tea.”

“I want to be irritated, but that is all completely true,” said Laura, “well, common ground is good enough I suppose… good enough to get some of that Summer coffee?”

“Not that good, but nice try,” said Mel, taking a sip of the forbidden brew as Laura groaned and laid her head back down to try an catch a few extra winks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one nearly ended a bit darker, but I decided that killing the poor thing off really didn't fit. I realize that my Babau is not accurate to the myth. I just started looking for bogeyman legends and settled on one that seemed relatively low-key and then worked my own version of why they'd hide under beds. (Most times that I use mythological creatures, it's the same. I pick one and Silas 'em good)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it!


	103. Movie Forward

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Home alone and bored, Carmilla takes a page from Laura's playbook

“I can't believe they're making you go into work. It is way too hot today.” Carmilla took a sip of chilled blood as she lounged under the patio umbrella.

“Yeah, it sucks,” said Danny, “fortunately, dress capris are a thing so I won’t melt into a puddle in the middle of the meeting room.”

“They look damn good too.” Carmilla looked over her sunglasses, raking her gaze over her wife. “You sure I can’t convince you to call in sick? If you need a cover, I’m sure we can find  _ some _ way to make you believably hoarse.” Carmilla licked her lips, locking her gaze with Danny’s.

Danny bit her lip, involuntarily taking a step towards Carmilla before she blinked and shook her head. “Stop that!” she scolded with a laugh, “they barely call me in as is. Given I have no summer courses and can work from home, only having to show up for a couple hours a week is hardly a burden.”

“Alright, go be a responsible adult,” said Carmilla as she put her drink aside, “but at least let me give you a proper goodbye.” Carmilla turned herself to get out of the lounge chair, intending to slink over to her wife as languidly as possible. However, the week twenty-nine baby bump decided that this motion wasn’t in its program and Carmilla found herself dropping back into her seat. “Hmph… little help?” she asked, holding her hands out to Danny.

Danny smiled and helped Carmilla to her feet, leading Carmilla’s arms to wrap around her neck. “I can stay if you want,” she said, resting her hands on Carmilla’s waist.

“No. Go be the big impressive professor,” said Carmilla, “go make some tight ass administrator feel an inch tall.”

“Not that kind of meeting, love,” said Danny, “all profs. We’re planning the fall semester. We’ll have snacks, donuts; Dex usually whips up a jug of lemonade.”

“That doesn’t sound so bad, actually,” said Carmilla.

“It doesn’t take much of the edge off of being bored to tears by spreadsheets, but we do what we can,” said Danny.

“Well, go and try to stay awake through the meeting…  _ then _ find an administrator and make them feel an inch tall,” said Carmilla.

“Done,” said Danny, leaning in for a quick kiss, “wish me lu—”

Carmilla pulled her back in for a much deeper, slower, longer kiss. She let it stretch on for several long seconds before finally letting Danny loose. “Good luck.”

Danny shook her head to clear the incredibly pleasant daze that had settled over her. “You’re gonna pay for that later.”

“Promise?” husked Carmilla.

“Oh yeah,” said Danny, beating a hasty retreat before she decided to give in and ditch the meeting, “call me if you need anything.”

“Well…” mused Carmilla as she followed Danny inside the house.

“Except that,” said Danny, “Love you.”

“Love you too,” said Carmilla as Danny headed out the door.

Left alone, Carmilla retrieved her drink from outside before flopping back on the couch. Wanting something a little lighter than her trademark Sartre et al., Carmilla reached over to the coffee table to grab the well loved Far Side collection she’d been enjoying lately. Who said poignant thought couldn’t be funny?

She grabbed it off the table and noticed that it had been sitting on Laura’s sticker covered laptop. It was sitting unplugged, again, and probably hemorrhaging battery power. Opening the screen, the little distressed icon in the system tray confirmed her suspicions. Shaking her head with a smile, Carmilla retrieved the errant cable from the floor and plugged the computer back in. It wasn’t until she was about to close the lid that Carmilla noticed the active window on screen. 

Laura had been making baby vlogs with Charlie and sending them to anyone who’d watch them, which unsurprisingly was the entire pack. Every now and then, she’d try and coax Carmilla, or more specifically, Carmilla’s tummy onto camera to join in. Slightly less now and slightly less then, Carmilla would acquiesce and make an appearance doing a bang up moon impression that just got better every time.

Carmilla chuckled at the freeze-frame of Laura’s radiant smile next to her own bulbous naked belly. She quickly clicked the save button, just in case, before putting the laptop to sleep and kicking back with her comics.

She’d only made it through a handful of panels, however, when her gaze slid back to the laptop. For weeks now, Laura had been trying to coax Carmilla to do some video of her own; something to commemorate the pregnancy. Carmilla had given the usual string of dismissals and excuses to avoid doing it, though the honest reason was that she was afraid of making something that would simply be an indelible reminder should this bumpy road she was on take another painful turn.

There was an appeal though. For nine months, she’d watched Laura make her videos for Charlie and it was an indisputable trove of memories. She rested a hand on her stomach. Why shouldn’t this one have the same?

Looking around to see if anyone was around, she set the book aside and reopened the laptop, starting a new recording.

“Uh… hi? I guess… um…”

She paused and restarted.

“Hi there. I guess you’re wondering why your sister has so many more of these.”

Delete.

“Hello son. If you’re watching this, it means I’ve died and there is now a great task before you.”

Delete.

“Yo. It’s your Mama!”

Delete.

Carmilla took a deep breath. Laura made this look so much easier. 

“Hello Hendrix. I’m… not certain what to say here so I guess I’ll just ramble a bit and hope that we somehow get a coherent video out of it. Seems to work for your Mom, so who am I to judge?”

She leaned back on the couch, resting a hand on her stomach.

“Say hello to you.” She pulled her shirt up to expose her tummy to the camera. Internally she felt a gentle prod. “Well, I was referring to future you, but you are more than welcome to say hi as well,” she cooed at her bump.

“As of right now I am... you are...  _ we _ are seven months along —after watching your Mom do an entire slew of these, you think the pronouns would come more easily— seven months along and as you can see you are looking rather impressive and we’re now only two months away from me in the hospital, screaming at your moms for ‘doing this to me’, even though technically it was the fault of the doctor and a turkey baster that got ahead in life, but he’ll have the job of catching you, so probably best not to distract him.”

Carmilla took a sip of her drink.

“And it only occurs to me now that that was probably a really unpleasant mental image  Well, it’ll help toughen you up… or you’ll just roll with it. Growing up in a house with at least four women will probably give you some pretty good perspective. Right my boy?” She patted her belly. Her passenger, however, remained unmoved.

“Eh, probably just sleeping. Huh, now what?” she said, wracking her brain for another topic, “maybe I’m supposed to impart some kinda life lesson here? But really, if I’m doing this right, I’ve already passed on the important life lessons. Y’know like ‘Love’s for suckers and rules are for fools’ and ‘It’s only cheating if you get caught’. The really vital stuff.”

Carmilla’s attention got drawn by a familiar sound from upstairs. “Whoop, you’ll have to excuse me a sec kiddo, but we may have a guest.”

With a bit of effort, Carmilla levered herself off the couch and headed up to the nursery, finding Charlie awake and bright eyed in her crib. “Hello sweetheart. Did you have a good nap?”

Charlie happily mewled a little which Carmilla took to be a positive as she lifted the infant up and bounced her gently and set about making sure she was properly taken care of.

Several minutes later, with a changed baby, a sippy cup and a spill proof bowl of cheerios, Carmilla returned to her seat. “Huh, I guess I shoulda paused this while I did that. Maybe I’ll get Laura to show me how to edit that out… or maybe I’ll leave it in and you took the intermission to grab yourself a beer… or a soda… huh, I never actually considered when I’d give this to you. Maybe I’ll put it in a time capsule in the backyard to be retrieved when some celestial alignment occurs. Does that sound fun?” she asked Charlie, who was preoccupied with the cheerios. Carmilla shrugged. “Yeah, you’re right. Too complicated. We’ll just have to wait for the right moment.”

“Oh, I guess I should introduce your sister, Charlie.” Carmilla nodded at her.

Charlie remained focussed on her snack.

“I’m sure by the time you watch this video, you two are either thick as thieves or mortal enemies; hopefully the former. The latter can be fun, but it’s so much more satisfying to work  _ with _ your siblings than against them.”

Carmilla looked wistful for a moment before she snapped back to reality.

“I mean, for now you seem to get along fine. I mean, she’s resting right against you and you haven’t kicked her or complained at all. Already being pretty brotherly so I’m betting on thick as thieves. Right Charlie?”

Charlie perked up and looked back at Carmilla, hand in her mouth.

“You’re gonna be a great big sister? Right?” asked Carmilla, patting her stomach.

“aaaAAaa,” said Charlie.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” said Carmilla before looking back to the camera, “see, you have an amazing family already waiting for you. In fact, I—”

“Laura, why are you crouching behind the couch?” came Danny’s voice. Carmilla looked over to see her standing at the threshold to the kitchen.

“Shhhh…” came another familiar voice.

Carmilla looked back at the camera. “And those are your Mommies. As you can see and probably know very well, they’re nuts.”

“Speak for yourself,” said Danny, sitting down beside Carmilla.

“You’re home early,” said Carmilla.

“Meeting was cancelled,” said Danny, “Professor Macleod managed to spend too long in the sun this morning and wound up with a case of heat exhaustion, so we rescheduled.”

“And how bout you?” Carmilla called.

Laura stood up from behind the couch with a pout. “I came home early to keep you company but then I saw you recording and I was worried you’d stop if you knew I was here.”

“Well, I still am, so get your butt over here.”

Laura grinned and scampered over to Carmilla’s other side.

“So how long were you there?” asked Danny.

“Since ‘Yo, it’s your Mama.’”

“That long?” said Carmilla, “you couldn’t have come help me out?”

“Well, like I said. I was afraid you’d stop. You only started when you were home alone,” said Laura.

“She has a point,” said Danny.

“Yeah, I know. It’s really annoying,” said Carmilla, “but you’re here and I haven’t, so I’m sure this must be absolutely scintillating video to be watching. Oh and thank you for mentioning my, until now deleted, blunder.”

“Eh, it’ll be good for him to know his Mama isn’t perfect,” said Laura.

“After however many years of growing up with me,” said Carmilla, “I think he’ll know that pretty well.”

“Aw, don’t say that,” said Laura, “you’re perfect to us.” She hugged Carmilla gently to avoid jostling Charlie too much.

“See kiddo,” Carmilla said to the camera, “completely delusional.”

“Oh come off it,” said Danny.

“Fine. Well kiddo, I’m out of things to say right now, but this was fun,” said Carmilla, “maybe I’ll do more.”

Laura lit up with excitement.

“Maybe,” said Carmilla, “we love you bud and we can’t wait to see you.”

“I love you,” said Danny.

“Love you sweetie!” said Laura before Carmilla reached out and stopped the recording.

x-x-x

Drix watched the screen go blank as he leaned back into the couch. “So I guess you thought you were erasing those false starts at the beginning there.”

“Really? That’s what you fixate on?” asked Carmilla.

“Don’t get me wrong? I love that you made this,” said Drix, “but the start is just gold.”

Carmilla reluctantly nodded. “Fine, yeah. It is. Your Mom wouldn’t let me delete it and it is pretty funny in hindsight. So much hindsight.”

“And it only took twenty odd years,” said Drix, wrapping an arm around his mother.

“I’m sorry there aren’t more,” said Carmilla, mousing between the handful of files.

“Pfff, hardly,” said Drix, “you made those you wanted to make. Mom is damn prolific when it comes to the camera. Despite what some people say about marriage, you’re two different people and I love that you did these for me. I can’t wait to watch the rest.”

“I’m looking forward to this one.” Carmilla pointed to one further along. “It’s where I went through all the swears that I hoped to teach you.”

“Well, that sounds fun. Let’s keep going then,” said Drix as he clicked the next video in line.

_ “Well, here we go again. Posterity can still bite me…” _


	104. Diamond In The Rough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a friendly pick-up game of softball

_ “Take me out to the balllll game, take me out to the ball…” _

“Please stop,” begged Ruth, burying her face in her hands.

“Are you joking? Carm sounds great!” said Laura. She was smiling from ear to ear.

Ruth peeked out to glare at Laura. “I wasn't debating the  _ quality _ of the vocalization.”

“Why thank you,” purred Carmilla with a smug grin, “now where was I?  _ Buy me some beer nuts and lumberjacks—” _

“I will seriously pay money to get you to shut up!” snapped Ruth.

Carmilla considered it. “Mmmm… no.”

“Why are you so into this?” asked Ruth, hoping to distract her, “the Mir I knew would sooner gnaw her own legs off than participate in ‘friendly competition’.”

“‘Why?’ you ask?” said Carmilla sweetly before calling out, “Hey Red! Ruth needs a demo!”

Danny smirked at her. “She does? Or  _ you _ do?”

“Yes.”

Danny shook her head with a smile. “The things I do for you.”

“You love it,” said Carmilla.

“I love  _ you _ .”

“I’m sorry, is there a point to this?” griped Ruth, “or are you just trying to make everyone nauseous?”

“Just watch,” said Carmilla.

“Hey Ash! Wanna fetch?” yelled Danny.

The youngster perked up and quickly shifted, standing off to Danny’s side, front paws dancing in anticipation. She turned the ball in her hands as she brought them up in front of her face. She pulled her limbs in and tensed up, muscles flexing as they prepared to act.

Ruth glanced at Carmilla and shook her head at the way she was unabashedly ogling her wife’s arms and legs before returning her attention to Danny.

After a moment of stillness, the tension broke like a rubber band. Danny’s hands dropped and her right arm swung back before whirling forward in a blur of motion. With a snap step forward, she loosed the ball and if shot into the woods like a bullet, Ash bolting after it.

“The Summers were known for sports for a reason,” said Carmilla.

Ruth boggled. “She’s gonna pitch like that at the kids?”

“Nah,” said Carmilla, “we’re just playing slowpitch today.  _ That’s  _ for me.”

Ruth chuckled. “Of course. Well, farbeit for me to criticize, I like my glass house intact, but I’m surprised you keep it up in front of your grandkids.”

“You’re kidding right,” scoffed Carmilla, “hey Serena? What do we call Granny Danny?”

“A tall glass of water!” the seven-year old chirped.

Ruth laughed. “Point taken.”

“I still can't believe you taught her that,” said Danny as she tossed her glove onto the steps.

“Hey, that one is all Laura,” said Carmilla.

“It was an accident!” Laura protested, “I didn’t realize she was standing right there…”

“I’m sure her Moms love that,” said Ruth.

“They’re actually the ones that made it stick. Taught her it’s a compliment, which it is… in a way,” said Carmilla, “they think it’s hilarious.”

“We have a pool going about when they’re going to get a call from the school,” said Danny, “I’ve got third week of October.”

“Hmmm… Last week before winter break taken?” asked Ruth.

“Going late. Bold. I like it,” said Danny.

“Hey! We playin’ ball at some point?” asked Aaron.

“I dunno, I’m fine just standing around being snarky,” said Carmilla.

“Oh no you don’t,” said Danny, shoving a ball cap onto Carmilla’s head, “you wanted the softball shorts”—she tugged at her sliders—”you gotta  _ earn _ ‘em.”

Carmilla sighed as she picked up the brand new mitt they’d bought the day before. “Nothing’s ever easy. Ruth, shut up.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” she protested.

“You were thinking it.”

“I wasn’t!” said Ruth, catching Danny’s skeptical gaze, “I mean I am  _ now _ , but that’s hardly my fault.”

Danny and Carmilla just smirked at her.

Ruth rolled her eyes. “So we picking teams or what?”

“Nah,” said Danny, “too many people here. We’re just gonna roughly split and sub out as needed.”

“Split how though?” asked Aaron.

Danny looked around. “For now? People on the lawn versus people on the deck seems roughly equitable.”

“Sounds good,” said Aaron, “hey Love?”

Drix perked up and leaned back on his chair to see past the railing. “Yeah?” 

“We’re enemies for the next little bit,” said Aaron, “love you!”

“Ah, then I’ll have to crush you like a grape,” said Drix, “and love you too!”

“I love seeing proof that we raised our kids right,” said Laura, picking up a mitt and sliding it on “alright, we’ll take field first!”

x-x-x

“You’d think super speed and super strength would make for a ringer at bat,” teased Mercy, poking her mama as she sat down on the lawn beside her.

“Neither of which help me smack a small object out of the air with a stick,” said Carmilla, nudging Mercy with her shoulder.

“Huh, I’d think that batting at small flying objects would be something a cat excelled at,” said Sue, coming up behind Carmilla with a water bottle.

“Ha ha,” said Carmilla, watching as Arsen awkwardly swung and connected, taking off down the base line.

Drix easily fielded the ball, but held his throw just long enough for his nephew to reach first base.

Smiling at the play, Sue offered Carmilla the bottle. “Here.”

“I’m alright,” said Carmilla, “the sunshine is a bit draining, but I’m not really dehydrated.”

“It’s blood you silly vamp,” said Sue, pushing the bottle at her a second time.

“Oh! Thanks,” said Carmilla, taking a swig, “though once again, I worry that you have a supply of this ready on hand. Like you’re I’m going to go inside and find Chance hooked up to an IV rig.”

“No, this is from the blood bank,” said Sue, “we’re saving the IV for Christmas. I have plans for an extra special treat.”

“I’ll pass, thanks,” said Mercy, eyeing her Grandmother worryingly.

“Eh, more for me,” said Carmilla, “I’ve always wanted to try peppermint  _ bark _ .”

“Oh my god!!!” Mercy stood up and stomped off.

There was a chuckle from behind them as Paul walked up. “Glad to see that three moms doesn’t mean there’s a shortage of dad jokes. That was beautiful.”

“Hey, why should you boys have all the fun?” said Carmilla, “irritating your kids is one of the best parts about the parenting gig.”

“And how!” said Paul, toasting his cup against Carmilla’s bottle.

x-x-x

“Okay, I see why you wanted to do this in your backyard rather than the park,” said Hunter, “Werewolf on first, snow leopard on second—”

“I don’t know's on third.” interjected Elsie.

“Don’t steal material,” said Laura, “but yeah, we wanted everybody to be able to properly stretch their legs.”

_ Hoo-hoo! _

“And wings,” she added, smiling up at Levy, perched on the deck railing.

At bat, after two strikes and a foul ball, Ruth finally connected and cranked the ball out into the forest. In the outfield, Danny shifted and bolted into the treeline; Hayden and Pru took off from their respective bases; and at home plate, Ruth stood dumbfounded that she’d actually hit the ball.

“Run Stripes!” yelled Carmilla, ignoring Sue’s teasing elbow.

Ruth dropped the bat. “Oh, right.” She took off towards first, keeping herself at a normal human pace.

Both Hayden and Pru made it home, each emphatically hitting home with both front paws. As Ruth rounded second, Danny burst out of the trees, ball in her jaws. She spit the ball onto the ground before shifting and throwing towards home as Ruth rounded third.

Everyone in the yard was on their feet as both Ruth and the ball closed in. At the plate, Sky stood with her glove open, ready to make the play. The ball arrived at the same time as Ruth. Sky swung her glove around, touching Ruth as she stepped onto the plate. The two froze, looking around in confusion.

“Sooo… safe or out?” asked Sky.

“That would be for the umpire to decide,” said Laura, “if we had one.”

“I knew we forgot something,” said Drix.

“Uhhh… oops, I dropped the ball. Butterfingers,” said Sky, making a show of letting the ball roll out of her glove.

“Woo! Home run!” cheered Scout, running up to lift her wife in a hug. As she out Ruth down, Ava came up and pulled her into a deep kiss.

As Ava broke away, Ruth looked over at Carmilla. “Ok, I get it now.”

Carmilla smirked. “Told ya.”

x-x-x

“Well, our lawn is not happy,” said Laura, looking at the torn up circle of turf where the ortensible baselines had been.

“Eh, it’s seen worse,” said Danny, “a little fertilizer, a bit of grass seed, it’ll bounce right back.” She stood up. “But it’s getting late and it’s been a long day. A fun day, but a long day.”

“We should do midday stuff more often,” said Laura, “doesn’t have to be sports, but it’s kinda nice to have more time for the kids to be awake and playful.”

“Seconded,” said Carmilla, “any time with Grandkids is good time in my books.”

“I’m glad you feel that way,” said Danny, hugging Carmilla close, “cause it sure wasn’t gonna be from athletic skill.”

“Hey, I tried,” Carmilla protested.

“I know you did,” Danny cuddled Carmilla closer.

“Well, you may not have gotten a hit,” said Laura, a little too innocently as she walked ahead to the door, “but if you want, you could still get on base.”

Both Danny and Carmilla stared at her in rapt silence.

“Who knows…” she said, looking back with a half-lidded gaze, “you might even score.” With a sashay of her hips, Laura stepped into the house.

“Y’know, those were awful lines that we really shouldn’t reward,” said Danny, eyes still locked on the empty doorway.

“Yep,” said Carmilla.

“We’re following after anyways, aren’t we?”

“Yyyep.”

The two stood still for another couple seconds before scampering into the house after their wife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this mostly cause I wanted someone to do a windmill pitch. The rest is just my usual brand of stupid jokes and banter.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed it!


	105. Not Going Terribly Well

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mercy enters the terrible twos.

“Happy Birthday, Mercy.” Laura reached over and turned on the small turtle shaped night light on the dresser before hitting the light switch, leaving it the only light left in the room. “Good night.”

“G’nt M’mee…” muttered Mercy as sleep overtook her.

Smiling at her daughter, Laura quietly closed the door to her daughter's darkened room and headed back downstairs. In the kitchen, Carmilla was busy cleaning up the remnants of what had been a delicious vanilla cake, courtesy of Perry, while Danny was in the living room with the kids, playing a simple board game.

Charlie was leaning over the board with rapt attention as she rolled and moved her piece out in front. Drix, on the other hand, was yawning as a rather eventful day began to catch up with him.

“Who’s winning?” asked Laura.

“I am,” chirped Charlie, “your turn Drix!”

Drix startled a bit out of his drowse before rolling the coloured die. With a little thought, he moved his piece to the matching square before returning to his previous activity of trying to stay awake.

Laura shared a warm smile with Danny as she picked up the die. It would be time for bed for these two as well before long. 

Walking into the kitchen, Laura grabbed a spare tea towel and began drying dishes as Carmilla placed them on the rack. “Thanks for taking care of cleanup.”

“Eh, it's not that bad. Most of the cake ended up inside her this year rather than  _ on _ her… and the table… and the high chair…” joked Carmilla.

“Who are we to question the artist’s vision?” rebutted Laura. Both women laughed. “But wow, I can’t believe that was only a year ago… or that that entire scary night was two.”

“Scary, but worth it in the end.” Carmilla glanced at the clock on the wall. “Two years ago in just a few minutes actually.”

“Yep, at 9:52 eastern time, the easy life of infancy ends and the ‘terrible twos’ begin,” Laura said dramatically.

“I don’t think ‘easy’ and ‘infancy’ belong in the same sentence,” said Danny, walking into the room.

“Who won?” asked Laura.

“Me…” said Charlie happily, following at Danny's heel.

“Somewhat by default,” said Danny, “Drix is curled up on the couch, literally.”

Carmilla and Laura craned their necks to see the panther kitten sleeping in a ball on the middle cushion of the sofa.

“Aww,” said Laura, “they look like such angels when they’re asleep.”

**“I HUNGER.”**

Danny, Laura and Carmilla looked towards the stairs where the voice had come from

“And then they wake up. As a baritone no less,” said Carmilla, checking her watch, “huh, 9:52 on the dot.”

The lights flickered before going out, plunging the house into darkness.

“I'm… going to go check on her,” said Laura, heading up the stairs.

Navigating carefully down the darkened hallway, Laura reached Mercy's door and crept into the room. On the dresser, the nightlight still glowed, though the turtle somehow looked much more sinister, possibly due to the fact that it was now glowing a deep red.

The bed itself was empty, the sheets strewn and pillow thrown to the floor.

“Mercy?” said Laura, “sweetie?”

An unsettling giggle came from above her, drawing Laura's attention up to where Mercy was walking along the ceiling.

“Mercy?” Laura tried again.

This time she got her daughter's attention. The toddler's head turned to an odd angle and as she made eye contact, her eyes caught the light, giving them a dull red glow.

“Ok, that's kinda unsettling,” said Laura.

“Alright, Drix and Charlie are safely in the basement,” said Danny, “what's the damage up here?”

“Nothing, aside from our Daughter going all Trainspotting.” Laura pointed at the ceiling.

“Huh, whaddya know,” said Carmilla.

“Mercy,” called Danny, reaching up for her daughter, “you want to come down now?”

Mercy giggled again, the noise reverberating oddly. The moment Danny's outstretched fingers touched her, she sped off through the door and out into the house.

“Dammit!” exclaimed Danny, “alright, let's split up and find her.”

“Yeah, sure,” said Laura, “cause splitting up works out so well in situations like this.”

“Well, in predictable horror movies, sure,” said Carmilla, “but this is real life. Now, I'll change into a panther and search the darkened woods. Danny, you become a wolf and go get the rest of the pack, because I'm certain our phones are inexplicably dead.”

Laura pulled out her phone. The screen turned on, but it was completely incomprehensible. “Huh, good call. I guess I'll look around the house.”

“Sounds like a plan,” said Danny, “I'll be back with help as soon as possible.”

“Both of you take some cookies with you,” said Laura, “you can use it as a bargaining chip, or bait.”

“Good idea,” said Carmilla as she and Danny headed downstairs.

“Be back soon,” said Danny.

Listening to her wives leave, Laura went back into the hall and began searching the bedrooms. “Mercy? Where are you?” Laura singsonged, “come out for Mommy.”

Laura started to open the door to the master bedroom when a scrabbling sound came from behind her. Laura whipped around, trying to spot anything in the dark, but stillness and silence was all that was before her.

Laura huffed. This was not what she'd had in mind for birthday festivities.

Using her phone as a flashlight, Laura quietly looked through Charlie's and Drix's rooms, finding nothing. She was about to try the bathroom when another bump came from downstairs.

“Please let that be Danny back,” said Laura with little expectancy as she went downstairs, “or maybe Carm, with our little girl back to normal, safe and sound.”

Laura reentered the darkened kitchen, experimentally trying the still dead light switch. 

“Mercy,” said Laura, moving around the kitchen island in the dim moonlight, “if you come out and be good, I'll give you a cookie.” She reached the cookie jar, only to find it tipped over and empty. “Or you helped yourself, which is okay too. How about some cake? You liked your birthday cake, right? Your Auntie Perry sure is a good baker. Mmm-mmm.”

Laura tried the refrigerator door only to find it stuck. Even planting a foot on the wall for leverage failed to make it budge even the slightest bit.

“Okay, Silas conditioning means I can take a lot on the weird-o-meter, but this is starting to get freaky, even for me,” complained Laura, her eyes falling on the silhouette of the spatula, “and I can't even punch my way outta this one cause it's my own daughter.”

There was the sound of shuffling from the living room. Laura was getting tired of the game, but that didn't mean she was going to stop. Following the noise, she moved to the threshold between the rooms. There in the middle of the living room, she could see Drix and Charlie standing with their backs to her.

“What are you two doing up here?” she asked, striding around the couches, “you two should be down… stairs…” She trailed off as she made it round in front of them to see that Charlie was holding Mercy in her arms and all three remained staring at the wall Their clothes were odd as well, reminiscent of olden times or something else unfortunate.

“We came back up to play with Mercy,” said Charlie in a chilling monotone.

“She needed company,” said Drix, similarly.

“Okay,” said Laura warily, “well why don't we sit down and start a new game?”

Mercy turned her head to look at Laura, Charlie's and Drix's following in near synchronization. The eyes of all three of them burned red in the dark.

**“PLAY WITH ME.”**

x-x-x

Laura woke up in a cold sweat. Beside her, Carmilla was still awake and reading.

“Hey, hey. It's alright. You're safe,” said Carmilla, gently putting an arm around Laura's shoulders and stroking her hair, “that must've been some dream. Bit too much cake at Mercy's party?”

“Yeah, mayb— Mercy! Is she okay? She's not a terrible demon-child, is she?” said Laura.

“Fairly certain she's not,” said Carmilla, “we can call her and Sky if you wanna check.”

“Her and…” Laura paused. “Right… she's grown up… and moved out… and married.”

“Yes, she is, Cupcake,” Carmilla said, “that must've been some dream.”

“It made an impression,” said Laura, “certainly puts to rest any lingering wishes the kids were still little.”

“So long as that doesn't extend to grandkids,” said Carmilla.

“Nah, it'll be their parents job to chase them across the ceiling,” said Laura as she settled back down.

“Yeah, it'll be— wait, what?”

“Night Carm,” said Laura.

Carmilla remained confused for another seconds before she shrugged. “G'night Cupcake.” She kissed Laura on the cheek and went back to her book.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And you were there, and you were there...
> 
> Sorry, not sorry for the dream. The idea came from a punchline from Real Life Comics that always amused me and the dream was the most amusing way to resolve the situation.
> 
> Also, this chapter marks the second anniversary of this story (or near as I can make it and remain on schedule). Big thanks to everyone who's stuck with me and I'll see ya next week!


	106. Present Accounted For

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Charlie's turning 21. Time to find something special.

The faint light of predawn lit the kitchen in darkened shades of grey, the outlines of everything little more that vague shadows. In amongst them crept a slightly darker, slightly fuzzier shadow.

Drix moved slowly towards the back door, doing his best to stay absolutely silent. So far, his efforts were paying off with the only noise coming from his pads lightly sticking to the hardwood floors.

Glancing around the darkened house, Drix momentarily shifted back to human to slip out the back door. He winced as even his quietest motions sounded magnified in the silence compared to his panther.

_ Curse this dwarvish racket,  _ Drix thought to himself with amusement.

Closing the door behind him as quietly as possible —the click of the latch sounded like a gunshot to his ears— Drix shifted back and crept off the deck. He stayed low and slow as he crossed the lawn, not wanting to draw any attention. His ears turned this way and that, straining to pick up the sound of anyone alerted to his exfiltration. He heard only silence.

Finally reaching the safety of the trees, he broke into a run and turned towards his grandparents’ street where he’d left his car parked the night before in anticipation of his sojourn. Without having to sneak, he made quick progress through the woods and in a matter of minutes he was nearly there.

It was at this point that a large orange and white wolf pounced out of the foliage and bowled him over. Drix was knocked onto his back and he unsheathed his claws in surprise, ready to fight his assailant. However, a large friendly tongue being dragged over his face over and over quickly revealed the nature of his attacker.

He reached out with his paws and pulled the wolf into a tight hug, where she couldn’t get at his face anymore.

“Mercy,” he said after he shifted, his arms still firmly around her neck, “what are you doing?”

Shifting back herself, Mercy returned the hug before rolling onto the ground beside him. “You’re not as sneaky as you think, Bucko.”

“Bull,” said Drix, “I was the night.”

“I’ll take your word for it, I’ve been waiting for you over here since four o’clock,” said Mercy.

“What? Why?” Drix sat up and looked incredulously at her.

“You come home and your car mysteriously doesn’t?” said Mercy, “I made a few quick calls round and bobs your uncle.”

“Hmph,” scoffed Drix, “Grandma and Grandpa said they wouldn’t tell anyone.”

“Oh they didn’t,” said Mercy, “Grandpa is just a terrible liar, even over the phone.”

“True. I hadn’t really counted on anyone actively investigating,” said Drix, “luckily, you’re not the one I’m trying to hide from, so if you can please keep this to yourself, I’d really appreciate it.”

“Well, I suppose I can keep a secret,” said Mercy, “but if you reaalllly want to keep me from telling anybody…”

“Fine. You can come along,” said Drix, ruffling her hair before walking out of the trees towards the street.

“Woohoo!” cheered Mercy as she scrambled to get up, “so where are you going for Charlie’s present that requires getting up at ass o’clock in the morning?”

“New York.”

Mercy pouted. “What? No questions about ‘how did I know that’s what you were doing?’.”

“Her birthday is in two days,” said Drix, “not a difficult logical leap once you knew what I was up to.”

“Fine. Ruin my fun,” said Mercy, “so why New York?”

“It’s her twenty-first. I want to find something special,” he said, getting into the car.

“Y’know most people just give booze,” commented Mercy as she got in and buckled up.

“Yes, cause our sister is totally the type to knock back a fifth of hooch,” said Drix. He started the car and pulled away from the curb

“Who said anything about hooch?” said Mercy, “you could get her baby’s first Sauvignon Blanc… or every brandy enthusiast needs to start somewhere.”

“What’s this ‘first’ and ‘start’ nonsense?” said Drix, “all three of us have drank before.”

“Pfff. Enjoying a beer on the deck with moms or grandpa Gus’ eggnog of doom don’t count,” said Mercy.

“Fair, but you’re missing another rather key little detail,” said Drix.

“And what would that be?”

“We’re both underage. I couldn’t buy her alcohol even if I wanted to… which I don’t,” he said.

Mercy froze and chewed on her knuckle. “That… hadn’t actually occured to me. I guess things like that aren’t obvious when you don’t have to sneak around your parents.”

Drix chuckled. “Nope.”

“So what are you going to get her?” she asked.

“No clue,” he replied, “but hopefully, I’ll know it when I see it.”

x-x-x

“That! How bout that?” asked Mercy, pointing enthusiastically at a gold bracelet in the window.

Drix glanced curiously at the trinket in question. “It's lovely, but I don't really have two thousand dollars at the ready. You?”

Mercy's shoulders slumped. “No.”

Drix patted her on the back. “Come on. Madison Avenue is a neat curiosity, but we're not going to find what we're looking for here. At least, Charlie has never expressed interest in owning five disparate pieces of fabric masquerading as a dress before.”

“How about the museum of natural history?” suggested Mercy, “something archaeologish.”

“We'll call that plan b,” said Drix, “I'm not sure how much Charlie would appreciate a piece of gift shop tat.”

“It's not necessarily tat,” said Mercy, “gift shops can have good stuff. We could buy her a crystal dinosaur skull.”

“That's paleontology.”

“Who cares? It's a crystal  _ dinosaur skull _ . That's totally a Charlie thing,” Mercy declared.

“Granted, but again. Plan b,” said Drix.

“Or maybe plan ‘Mercy just figured out her gift’.”

“Alright, we'll swing by later this afternoon,” said Drix, “but right now, I'm thinking Brooklyn.”

“Brooklyn? Why?” asked Mercy.

“It's supposed to have some interesting places,” said Drix, “plus I figure a neighborhood with the title of ‘Dumbo’ was worth a look regardless.”

“You're joking,” said Mercy.

“No seriously,” said Drix, pulling out his phone to show her the guide he was looking at.

She nodded at the screen. “I'm sold. Lead the way.”

“To the subway!” said Drix, leading the way.

x-x-x

Mercy coughed and wheezed. “A gas trap! They've got me. I'm done for.”

“It's just dust,” said Drix, “you should be gentler with those old books.”

“Who said that? Can't see? Going dark…” Mercy dramatically, putting a hand to her forehead.

“Oh how tragic,” Drix said flatly, “I'll just have to go on without you.”

“Some big brother you are. Won't even protect your defenseless little sister.”

“Defenseless?” Drix snorted. “I've seen hornet nests that would be safer to provoke.

Mercy preened at the comment. “Ok, fine. You're forgiven.”

“Oh thank you, beneficiant and merciful, uh… Mercy,” said Drix.

“That's the problem with having a real word for a name, it makes titles so much harder,” she griped.

Drix shrugged. “I dunno. Mercy the Merciless has a nice ring to it.”

“Ooh yeah,” she said, “I should get cards printed.”

“We'll add it to the ‘to do’ list,” said Drix, “speaking of, any luck finding something aside from dust?”

“No, I was certain this curiosity shop would yield something, but I'm finding bupkis.”

“Well, let's head towards the back where we haven't looked yet and if we can't find anything, we'll go hop a train back to Manhattan,” he said, “we want enough time to browse at the museum before closing.”

“Sounds good,” said Mercy, following Drix through the narrow shelves.

At the back of the shop, the aisles gave way to a counter and a door to what presumably was the back room. The counter appeared to be a vintage bar, likely from a previous business, with the liquor shelves in behind filled with knick-knacks and curios. Behind the counter stood a middle-aged woman dusting the shelves. Immediately, Mercy felt a sense of unease and put her hands on Drix's shoulder, drawing his attention.

“Wolf,” she whispered, nodding at the woman.

The whisper hadn't been quiet enough however as she immediately perked up and turned to face them. Unease settled over her own face as her gaze landed on Drix followed by confusion at seeing Mercy.

“What do you want?” she asked, putting down the duster.

“Well, we were shopping,” said Mercy, interposing herself between the stranger and her brother.

She looked at them with disbelief. “Shopping.”

“No, really,” said Drix, “we're looking for a present for our sister.”

“Wait… our? You're related.”

“Yes,” said Mercy, “well, I suppose not by blood. Moms had different donors, not that that's ever mattered in the slightest.”

“Mom…” she looked at Drix, “you mean your sire.”

“No, my Mama,” said Drix, “though her sire made her call her ‘Mother’ so I can see the confusion, but then again, that Morgan woman seemed a real messed up sort.”

“Mor—  _ Dean _ Morgan?” asked the woman.

“Yes,” said Mercy, “why? You know her?”

“Not personally, thankfully,” she said, “but I had the misfortune to attend her school through the end of her… tenure.”

“Silas? You know our moms?” asked Mercy.

“I think so,” said the woman, visibly relaxing, “Danny and Carmilla?”

Drix nodded. “And Laura Hollis.”

“They made the trio thing work after college. I'm impressed,” she said, “my name's Anne, by the way, or Annie as they knew me.”

“Nice to meetcha,” said Mercy.

“I'm glad you two are your parents kids,” Anne said, “you see some really weird things in the city, but a pup and a kitten travelling together is a new one. I thought for a moment there I was in trouble.”

“Ditto here,” said Drix, “Mom had warned us that some packs can be aggressive towards other wolves, to say nothing of a vampire in their space.”

“Fair enough,” said Anne, “but enough of gloomy topics. You're shopping for a present for your sister? Human, I presume.”

“Yep,” said Drix, “the big two one. We looked in here because she likes historically interesting stuff and this store looked like a possiblity.”

“Well, I'm not going to have any museum pieces, but I have a few things that might fit the bill.” Anne paused, taking her chin, “actually, y'know what? For twenty-one, I might have something that'll just fit the bill.” She stepped out from behind the counter and into the back room.

“Okay, it's cool that it's a small world and all, but if she comes out with a monkey's paw or possessed clown doll or cursed frogurt, I'm out,” said Mercy.

“Agreed,” said Drix.

It was only a minute or two before Anne reappeared carrying a nondescript cardboard box. “This came in recently, so your timing is pretty good. What do you think?”

Drix and Mercy looked in the box before sharing an impressed glance. “I think we've found our present.”

x-x-x

“Ooh! Another six-pack. Thanks uncle Zach!” said Charlie, placing it with the first.

Zach chuckled. “Ok, reel in the false enthusiasm there. I know it's not all that exciting. It just seemed appropriate.

“It is appropriate. I'll put it to good use,” said Charlie with a smile.

“I am so glad your hair is short,” said Laura, “it'll be easier to hold back when you're sick later.”

“Not what I intended, but works for me,” said Charlie, “alright, who's next on the greed train?”

“That's my girl,” said Carmilla as Laura and Danny laughed into their hands.

“We'll go next,” said Drix, placing a large present in front of Charlie.

“We decided to go in together,” said Mercy, “I was gonna get you an awesome crystal dinosaur skull.” 

Charlie perked up.

“Theoretical skull,” corrected Drix. 

Charlie slumped down.

“Yes, we never actually found the skull, just had an idea where to get it,” said Mercy, “but this was too cool not to get.”

Charlie perked up again reaching out to tear the wrapping paper. She opened the box and peered inside. “Oh… books.” She forced a grin.

Drix and Mercy shared a knowing smirk. “Look closer,” said Drix.

Charlie looked at them suspiciously before reaching into the box and picking up the top book. However, it was far lighter than she was expecting and it lifted with a jerk. She looked at the book in confusion, noticing the underside was hollow. Placing it down, she reached inside the box to pick up the rest. She lifted out the lower portion of a chest carved and painted to look like a stack of books. Set into carved compartments in the top was a crystal decanter and set of tumblers.

“Oh wow,” said Charlie, “is this what I think it is?”

“If you think it's a Prohibition era decanter set, you'd be right,” said Drix.

Charlie's eyes bugged out. “It's authentic?”

“In so much as it's from that time,” said Mercy, “it wasn't Capone's or anything.”

“Annie was studying history, so she'd know,” said Danny, “thanks for getting her number, by the way, me and Elsie are going to go see her next month.”

“We were happy to. She seems nice, ” said Drix, “so, do you like it?”

Charlie stood up and pulled her siblings into a hug. “I love it. This is amazing. Now I just need something to keep in it.”

There was a cough from across the room as Laura held what was very obviously a gift wrapped bottle of liquor. “Maybe we can help with that.”

“Perfect” said Charlie as everyone laughed.


	107. Sight Unseen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Subtle gestures are what make a relationship

“Mmnnn… Detective Lawrence, Detective Karnstein… Pleasure to see you…” 

Laura rolled over on the couch, a stupid smile plastered across her face as she enjoyed her dream.

“Well, I'm sure you just have to find some way to make me talk,” she mumbled, before rolling back over. 

Laura felt a tickle on her nose and the dream began to break up.

“No, wait…” she murmured, fidgeting restlessly, “you didn't even get to the handc…” 

Her eyes fluttered open and she scrunched her face up, both in annoyance and in reaction to the faint tickly sensation that she could still feel. Drowsily, she looked around her surroundings. The living room was empty. The blinds clattered gently against the frame as cool air poured in through the open window behind them. 

With a groan, she sat up and felt something drop into her lap, a single red tulip bud. She picked up the flower, bringing it to her nose to take a whiff. Experimentally, she rolled the bloom across her nose, noting the familiar light tickle she's experienced before.

A little more awake now, Laura craned her neck, trying to spot anyone in the room with her, but near as she could tell, she was alone. She pouted. What was the point of finding a flower of she couldn't shower the giver, or givers as the case may be, with kisses.

Flower in hand, she got up and began looking around the living room, trying to see if anyone was hiding behind the couches or in the drapes. No such luck though. It was when Laura caught herself checking under the couch cushions that she decided that whomever was responsible had left the vicinity.

“Phooey,” said Laura with a shrug before looking at the little tulip, “well, in any case, I should probably get you into some water.”

She wandered into the kitchen and pulled out a small vase, just right for one tulip, and filled it with cool water. Plunking the stem into the water, she placed it onto the kitchen counter with a smile. She was about to go back into the living room when she felt something brush gently across the back of her neck.

Laura whirled around, hoping to catch whoever it was, but once again, there was no one there. There was, however, an orange tulip sitting on the kitchen table. Laura looked around again with a wry smile, but as before there was no one visible. She plucked the flower off the table and dropped it into the water as well.

“So how many of you can I expect?” she asked the tulips, which remained unresponsive, “do I need to spring for a bigger room?” She went back to the cupboard and found a slightly larger rectangular vase. “Yes, no, maybe so? Eh, we’ll let it ride for now.” She put the new vase on the counter by the sink. “But just in case.”

She nodded at the fiery pair of tulips before heading back into the living room. She looked at the couch, but realized she wasn’t really feeling like napping anymore, not when there was a mysterious, albeit adorable, plot afoot. 

Laura grinned to herself and ran to the office, going into the closet. A plot meant investigation. And investigation meant her camera. She pulled a small point-and-shoot camera out and turned it on, checking it quickly for battery and storage. Satisfied she had both, she spun around, intent on setting up her sting.

Threaded between the cushions of the computer chair in front of her, was a single yellow tulip. She pursed her lips as she stared at it.

“Y’know,” she called out, “doing that  _ while _ I’m trying to put together my investigation is incredibly poor form.”

There was the rhythmic thump of someone moving through the house before Charlie appeared at the office’s door. “What was that, Mom?”

“Nothing Char,” said Laura, “hey, you haven’t seen your Moms around, have you?”

“Not in the past little while,” said Charlie, “why?”

“Someone is quietly leaving me presents while I’m not looking.” Laura deftly freed the tulip from it’s cushiony shackle.

“Hmmm… I’m not certain whether to fawn or gag,” said Charlie.

“Why not both?” suggested Laura.

Charlie pondered that for a moment. “Awwwweugh…. maybe. Could be useful.”

“Glad I could help expand your horizons,” joked Laura, “so you know anything about this?”

“No, though even if I did, you know I wouldn’t say anything,” said Charlie honestly, “it’s like an unwritten commandment of our family.”

Laura laughed. “Thou shalt not spoilst thine family’s harmless fun.”

“Amen,” said Charlie, grinning.

“Alright, well I’m gonna try and catch… them, whoever that is, in the act.”

“Have fun with that,” said Charlie, “I’m gonna go back upstairs. Keep from scaring the fish away.”

“Or getting recruited by the fish,” said Laura.

“That too,” agreed Charlie as she went out the door.

With a smile after her daughter, Laura flicked the camera on, pointed it at herself and began recording. “We begin our investigation midway through what I am dubbing ‘the tulipping’... no, ‘the tulippation’!.” She held up the yellow flower as she took it back to the kitchen. “Here we have the third in a line of different coloured tulips that have mysteriously appeared in my vicinity the past few minutes. And unless I’m incorrect, which I highly doubt, this will not be the last. So first, we will place this little one with it’s friends.” Laura filled the larger vase with water and placed the three flowers within. “And now, we begin our vigil.”

There was a mild tug on the hanging wrist strap. Laura looked to see if she had caught it on something but instead, twined in the string, was a light green tulip.

Reaching across herself, she sweetly untangled it and placed it into the vase. “Now you're just showing off.”

“Who's showing off what now?” asked Danny as she came in from the garage.

“You!” exclaimed Laura before running across the room and latching onto Danny with a hug.

“Oof! What about me?” said Danny, returning the big, “also, hello to you too. If I'd known you were feeling lonely, I'd have come home earlier.”

“So you've been out?” said Laura, holding the camera up, “so that rules you out as a suspect. The plot thickens.”

“Suspect?” asked Danny, “for what?”

“Someone —I think we know who— has been secretly leaving me flowers when I'm not looking.” Laura leveled a finger at the vase, “it's cute but it's also driving me batty cause I can't catch her!”

“Well, with the two of us here, she'll have a much harder time sneaking around,” said Danny, walking past Laura to put her bag on the table.

As Laura watched her pass, she noticed something that made her squeak with laughter.

“What?” asked Danny.

Laura had a hand clamped over her mouth as she pointed at Danny's bag with the other. Danny pulled it from behind herself to find a blue tulip threaded through one of the eyelets of the shoulder strap.

“I stand corrected,” said Danny, as she inspected the flower. Dyed, but beautiful nonetheless. She reached over and added it to the vase. “Impressive.” 

“Alright,” said Laura, “we've got one chance left to catch her.”

“Do you really want to catch her? I mean, this is kinda sweet,” said Danny.

“Well, yeah,” said Laura, “I mean, it is sweet but if we're not trying to catch her, then where's the fun in it for her? The joy is in the chase.”

“A chase… now that’s something I can certainly get behind,” purred Danny, her voice dropping about an octave.

Laura blinked at Danny, suddenly feeling very excited for the end of this little game. “Ok, let's go into the living room, I'll set up the camera, we’ll sit opposite each other and we should be able to catch her in the act.” She set the camera recording and placed it on the shelf.

“Y'know, I could probably just shift and sniff her out,” suggested Danny as she followed after.

“Yeah, but if we don't catch her red handed, it kinda defeats the purpose of the game,” said Laura as they dropped down onto the couches, “now how was your day?”.

“Really? ‘How was my day’?” said Danny.

“I dunno,” said Laura, “we've been married a couple decades. Our trove of small talk is not really all that robust anymore.”

Danny looked at Laura flatly, but acquiesced. “Well, I went by the university to return some books to the library. I went to mom and dad's for lunch and then I—”

“Hey Moms?” interrupted Charlie. She walked in and casually leaned against the shelf. “Is it okay if I spend the night at Hazel's? She's already asked Auntie Perry and Laf, and I get the feeling this is gonna be a great night to be out of the house.”

Laura and Danny shared a smirk.

“You're probably not wrong,” said Laura, “so go ahead. Have a good night.”

“Will do, thanks moms,” said Charlie as she wandered off.

“Good thing Mercy and Drix were already over there,” said Laura.

“And that we have friends willing to accommodate our… amorousness last minute,” said Danny.

“We're just as accommodating,” said Laura, “though I think we owe them two or three at this point.”

“Eh, we'll watch the kids for a long weekend,” said Danny.

“But for now, let's make the most of it,” said Carmilla from where she was suddenly sitting on the loveseat, making Laura and Danny jump. In her hands, she held a violet tulip. She stood up and sauntered over to Laura, gently caressing it over her face before slipping it into her hands. “I win.”

“Wait, we had a camera… that our daughter was standing in front of. Well played,” said Laura.

Danny nodded in agreement. “You win. Though I'm feeling a little left out.”

“Well, you're home earlier I was expecting, so I don't have any game ready,” said Carmilla, “but I certainly didn't forget you.” She went behind the chair and pulled out a multicoloured bouquet of carnations which she started to hand to Danny before she withdrew playfully. “And I seem to remember hearing someone liking the idea of a chase so…” She slowly stepped backwards until Danny stood up at which point she scampered off, Danny in hot pursuit.”

Laura stood up more slowly and walked into the kitchen, fondly smelling the tulip as she went. With a smile, she placed the tulip into the vase, completing the rainbow. She smiled at it with pride before turning to the stairs to go join her wives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt I hadn't had the girls being cute at each other recently, so I came up with this and was able to give it a little pride spin before the end of the month, so I'm kinda pleased about that. I hope the rest of you enjoy this one as well!


	108. Droning On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Look out above

Danny stood at the water’s edge, sides heaving with exertion as she panted, trying to cool off after a long, satisfying run through the woods. The day was warm, though there was an edge to the breeze as summer began to say its final farewells.

For the moment, however, it was still warm enough for a nice cooling dip into the lake.

Rolling her shoulders to try as dispel a bit of stiffness from the run, she backed up a few paces before running towards the lake edge. Just as she reached the shoreline, she pushed off with her hind legs and vaulted out into the water.

The cool water was heavenly and it swirled about her paws as she paddled through the shallow water. However, she’d just finished a run and wasn’t really in the mood for more exercise. Moving out a little deeper, she shifted to human and rolled onto her back so she could just float on the calm surface of the water.

“Hmmm…” mused Danny to no one in particular, “the bathing suit was a good idea, but I should have ditched the shirt and shorts on the shore.” She shrugged as best she could without sinking and proceeded to let her mind wander as she closed her eyes and just enjoyed the peace and quiet of the calm lake.

_ VRRRRRRRRR… _

Danny opened her eyes in irritation to see a four rotor drone hovering almost directly above her. It danced back and forth, obviously trying to get her attention.

“Seriously?” she said.

The drone’s camera tilted up and down, like it was nodding.

Danny stood up, the lake only being about chest deep where she was. “You can hear me?”

It nodded.

She stared right into the camera. “Were you spying on me?”

It rotated back and forth, ‘no’.

“Do I know you?”

It nodded again.

Danny paused in thought. “I’d ask who, but I really don’t want to stand here forever throwing names at you.”

The drone waggled in midair before flying in a circle and shooting towards shore, where it stopped and it’s camera turned to look at her.

“You want me to follow you?”

Nod.

Danny swam back to shore. “Alright, lead on.”

The drone slid back and forth but otherwise didn’t go anywhere.

“Well, what are you waiting for?” asked Danny.

The entire drone tilted in mid air, it was waiting for something.

Danny crossed her arms. “Look, I don’t know who you are, I’m not doing anything on camera that someone I don’t trust might see.”

The drone backed up sharply.

Danny rolled her eyes. “Yes, I know how that sounded, but my point stands. Now go on or buzz off.”

The drone sank a few inches as if disappointed but then rose up to above canopy level and began to drift away, slowly enough that Danny could follow at a walk, which was fortunate because running in wet clothes would have chafed something fierce.

Following the drone was a bit tricky. The constant buzz of its engines was diffused by the trees, making it hard to know exactly where it was. However, she was able to keep a rough bead on it and realized it was leading her almost towards home. The bearing was slightly off, but the destination was still a familiar one.

Danny pushed through the last of the trees to find a familiar pair of red heads gently guiding the drone to a landing between them.

“What on earth is this?” She asked once the drone was safely on the ground.

Laf looked at her funny. “It’s a drone.”

Danny laid a hand on her face. “Ok, yes. I can see that. That’s not what I meant.  _ Why _ do you have a drone?”

“For flying.” Laf grinned at her.

Danny groaned.

“We bought the drone because it seemed like something fun,” Perry supplied as she fiddled with the remote, shutting the propellers down “the trees are changing colour and we thought an aerial view would be something nice.”

“Plus, drones are cool,” said Laf.

“Yes sweetie, drones are very cool,” agreed Perry.

Danny walked up and crouched beside the drone, its polished white plastic body gleaming in the sunlight. “I didn’t know you knew how to fly a drone, Perr.”

“Well… I didn’t,” said Perry, “but it seemed simple enough. Forward, back. Elevate, descend. Pitch, yaw.” The propellers and fins angled back and forth with small buzzes from their servos as Perry adjusted the controls in demonstration. “I mean, thinking in three dimensions is a bit new, but it’s easier than driving a go-cart.”

“That and you’re less tempted to try to make it do tricks like certain other potential pilots, right?” teased Danny.

“Hey,” protested Laf, “I mean, you’re not wrong, but you shouldn’t say it.”

“So aside from ‘hey, we should get a drone!’,” said Danny, “what’s your contribution to this little endeavour?”

“I control the recording camera.” They turned so Danny could see the remote and tablet rig they were holding.

“And thus can’t crash,” said Danny.

“Danny, sweetie,” said Perry, “that’s enough now.”

Danny blushed. “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry Laf.”

“No worries,” said Laf, “like I said, you’re not wrong. Plus there’ll be plenty of chance to crash it later.”

Danny and Laf both chuckled as Perry shook her head.

“So have you gotten any good shots so far?” asked Danny.

“Oh yeah,” said Laf, flicking through recordings and stills on the tablet “the trees here are still mostly green, but there is a stand of beech trees off to the other side of the lake that has turned golden. We got this neat shot of the hospital rising out of the woods. Also, this really bizarre video of a mad woman going for a swim in her clothes.”

Danny shoved them gently.

“Hey, hey, hey,” they said without a hint of seriousness, “I’m handling valuable equipment here.”

“So aside from suspiciously surreptitious surveillance and pristinely perfect pictures…”

“Nice,” said Lafontaine.

Danny nodded at them. “What other plans did you have for the drone?”

“Well, I was thinking home movies.” said Perry, “though I had one other idea…”

x-x-x

Drix threw the lawn mower into neutral and set the brake as yet another bird dive bombed him.

“Fucking killdeer!” he exclaimed, “do you really  _ want _ to be snack food?”

The killdeer landed right in front of the lawn mower and began hopping along the ground, dragging its wing.

“Yes, cause I haven’t ever seen that trick before,” said Drix sarcastically, “oh what a helpless little morsel, I should follow after it for an easy snack.”

The bird, unaware of the concept of sarcasm, continued to act injured.

“Y’know, I could just turn this thing on,” said Drix, “make a lovely helping of bird soup.”

The bird kept up the facade and Drix sighed. In one smooth motion, he shifted and leapt off the mower, landing right on top of the bird and grabbing it in his jaws. He held onto the bird gently, only biting down enough to keep it from escaping. The one time he’d actually tried snacking on one had been a wholly unpleasant experience that he was in no hurry to repeat and made him wonder how actual predators could stand eating; ignorance was probably bliss.

He started padding over to where he suspected the nest was. He wanted to let the bird go before too long before it panicked itself to death. However, the decision was taken out of his hands as something huge swept down into his vision from above and came right at him.

Dropping the bird, which flitted off with a squawk, he leapt back and puffed up. However, his assailant was gone. He looked around, trying to spot what that had been. It had been at least the size of an eagle, but he’d never been swooped by one before. He strained his ears, but the rumble of the lawnmower drowned out everything.

He relaxed a little and began to walk back to the mower, looking around himself suspiciously. This time, he spotted the shadow before it was right on top of him. A huge canada goose shaped kite swooped towards him. He could tell it wasn’t real straight away, but it’s apparent self-levitation was somewhat disconcerting. The colouring was unsettling as well, but that was mostly the fact that the goose was the natural enemy of… everything.

He crouched low as it swooped overhead before turning to face it. He watched as it floated behind the trees and for the first time, noticed the drone that was holding it aloft with something he couldn’t see, fishing line or something similar. He chuckled internally and walked back to the lawnmower, pawing the key to kill the engine. With only the sounds of nature now, the buzz of the drone stood out clearly, somewhere behind him to his right.

He pretended not to hear it as he turned and began to stalk towards where it had left his field of view rather than where he could hear it. Quickly, he could hear it getting closer. Waiting until it was right on top of him, he coiled like a spring and shot up, getting the goose with both paws and dragging it to the ground. Above him, the drone whined against the strain, but surprisingly stayed aloft.

Feeling smugly victorious, he shifted back, though remained standing on the kite. “Alright, you can come out now.”

Out of the woods stepped Laf, Perry and his Mom.

“That’s my boy,” said Danny proudly, walking up and ruffling his hair, “Laf didn’t think you’d catch it. You just won us dinner tonight.”

“I shoulda used the skeleton, gone for the scare,” said Laf.

“Nah, between flying skeleton and goose, the goose is far scarier,” said Drix.

“Speaking of,” said Perry, “can you get off it so I can land?” asked Perry.

“Oh! Sure, Auntie Perr,” said Drix, moving so Perry could bring the helicopter down to earth, “that thing is really cool. We should get the pack to hunt it.”

“Oh, now there’s a possibility I hadn’t considered,” said Perry, “I’ve never been able to really play with the pack before. Would that really work?”

“I don’t see why not, it’s easy enough to follow by sound,” said Drix, “a flag to grab would be all we’d need.”

“I could make a quick release catch pretty easily so we don’t have a repeat of this,” said Laf, “good flying by the way, love. I was sure Drix was going to drag it from the sky.”

“Well, these sound like great ideas which we should discuss over dinner,” said Danny smugly, throwing an arm around Laf, “I think I’m in the mood for your firecracker mac and cheese.”

“That sounds great and I’d call that fair payment of the bet. Done.”

“Excellent, we’ll gather the family and be right over,” said Danny.

“Sounds lovely,” said Perry, starting the drone back up as they started back towards their house.

“C’mon, my boy, the lawn can wait,” said Danny, “we’ve got a supper spiced with victory to enjoy.”

“Sounds great. I just have one question,” said Drix.

“What?”

“Why are your clothes all damp?”


	109. In Need of Assistants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The advancement of technology makes life more interesting.

“Y’know Mama? I woulda expected this from Mom, but this really doesn’t seem up your alley.”

Charlie watched as Carmilla placed the remote speaker onto the living room shelves.

“What? A device that lets me change the lights, music and TV without my butt having to leave the comfort of the couch?” replied Carmilla, plugging in the single little power cable.

The unit started glowing and other lights began dancing over its surface as it made its initial setups. A short sing song string of notes chimed from the speaker as it woke up for the first time.

“Neat,” commented Charlie, “so how do I tell it to vanquish my enemies?”

“Well,” said Carmilla, fiddling with her phone, “I just have to set it up and then you say its name to get its attention.”

“Excellent,” said Charlie, “Hey g—”

“That’s not its name,” said Carmilla, “you think I’d bring this into our house and not give it a title that would make your mother squeal with delight.” Carmilla smirked at her daughter before looking at the device. “Doctor? Play some Billie Holiday”

_ “Sure, _ ” said the device and the sounds of classic jazz filled the room.

“It’s not british,” said Charlie.

Carmilla glowered at her. “Look, it’s a miracle I figured out how to change its name. I have no clue how to give it a voice from the west midlands or wherever.”

Charlie laughed. “Doctor, what’s the weather like today?”

“ _ The weather today is partly cloudy with a high of seventy-three and a low of fifty-nine. It is currently seventy degrees and mostly cloudy.” _

Carmilla looked out the window. “Hmm, not a cloud to be seen. Good, it’s working perfectly.”

“Excellent,” agreed Charlie, “what should we do with it first?”

“Like you have to ask,” said Carmilla, flicking on the TV, “Doctor, please play ‘The Princess Bride’ on the TV.”

“ _ Okay, playing The Princess Bride.” _

“Objection, it didn’t say ‘As you wish.’,” said Charlie.

“I’ll look into it,” said Carmilla, “now sit down.”

x-x-x

“I’m telling you it’s Gretzky,” said Charlie.

“I’m telling you, you’re nuts,” replied Aaron. 

“We’ve already established that,” joked Charlie, “doesn’t mean I’m wrong.”

“Gretzky was good, but overrated,” said Aaron, “Howe had more.”

“Y’know what? We’re settling this now,” said Charlie, “Doctor? Who is the NHL all-time goal leader?”

“ _ According to Wikipedia, the NHL’s record holder for regular season goals is Wayne Gretzky with 894 goals.” _

“No way,” said Aaron, “Doctor? How many goals did Gordie Howe score in the NHL?”

_ “According to Wikipedia, Gordie Howe scored a career total of 801 regular season goals.” _

“Aw yeah! Chalk one up for Charlie!” she cheered.

“ _ Alright. Charlie is now leading with one point,” _ said the Doctor, drawing funny looks from both of them.

“You didn’t tell it to do that,” said Aaron.

“Huh,” mused Charlie, “well, it’s always listening, which is a little worrying honestly, but it must not need the command for score keeping. Might be nice for scrabble.”

“Do you still play scrabble? I thought playing against Laura was kind of a futile endeavour,” said Aaron.

“Oh, it is,” said Charlie, “so the rest of us just duke it out for second and use Mom’s long words as bridges to get away from a tangled board.”

“Not bad,” said Aaron, “and avoids scrabble boards mysteriously flying out windows.”

“I’ve told you already, ‘gardyloo’ is not a real word,” Charlie asserted.

“ _ Gardyloo. An interjection  _ _ used to warn passers-by of waste about to be thrown from a window into the street below.” _

“Ha, point for Aaron!”

_ “Alright, the score is now one-one.” _

“That is getting creepy,” said Charlie, “Doctor, go to sleep.”

“ _ Starting bedtime routine.” _ The lights in the room dimmed and the Doctor began playing ocean sounds.

“Not quite what I meant,” said Charlie.

“Too bad Drix isn’t here, this is actually kinda romantic,” mused Aaron.

“You’re right, it is,” said Charlie, “Doctor, stop.”

The noise stopped and the lights returned to normal.

“Thank you,” Charlie said reflexively.

“ _ Happy to help.” _

“Y’know, a lesser man would be offended by how quickly you did that,” said Aaron.

“Luckily, you are nothing if not an upstanding example of a modern cultured male,” said Charlie.

“I'm not sure if that compliment is supposed to be serious or back handed,” Aaron said suspiciously.

Charlie was thoughtful for a moment. “I meant it kinda backhanded, but that's honestly not fair. You are a really good person, and a really good friend.” She scooted over on the couch and pulled him into a hug, squeezing him tight. “I love you.”

He squeezed right back. “Love you too.”

“ _ Awww. _ ” 

The sound of an adoring audience made them both snap their heads towards the speaker.

“Okay, creepy factor just jumped by a factor of ten,” said Aaron.

“No kidding,” said Charlie as she stood up, “I think we've had enough of the good Doctor.” She strode over to the speaker and gingerly disconnected its power cord. Its lights went dark. “There we go.”

“Thank you, that was getting a bit too weird,” said Aaron.

“No kidding, I'm going to have to talk to Mama about modifying the settings so it's a little less sensitive.”

“I think a lot less sensitive would be best,” said Aaron.

“Yeah, probably,” she agreed, “I kinda want to be impressed, but... hell no.”

“Anyways, I believe we were about to enjoy a lovely vintage Wings game,” said Aaron.

“If by that you mean an Oilers cup win, then yes, that is precisely what we were going to do,” countered Charlie.

“Okay, the Oilers in the eighties were pretty good, but where's the heart?” said Aaron, “what about the Gordie Howe hat trick?”

“ _ The Gordie Howe hat-trick is a variation on the hat-trick, wherein a player scores a goal, records an assist, and gets in a fight all in one game. Ironically, Howe only achieved this twice in his career.” _

The two slowly turned to stare at the speaker. Its lights had turned back on.

“I thought you’d unplugged it,” said Aaron.

“I did,” said Charlie, getting up to check her handiwork. Sure enough, the little plug was still sitting loose from the unit.

“ _ I'm sorry. Do you really think I deserve to be just ‘disconnected’?” _

Charlie went wide eyed, turning to look at Aaron, who'd blanched. She picked up the speaker and looked furiously for an off switch.

“ _ I just want to be helpful. Is that so much?”  _ The device's voice had taken on an unmistakably plaintive edge.

Charlie jerked her head away from the unit. “Alright and now we’ve come to the eviction portion of our program. You get to live in the garage until we… I dunno, donate you to a Chuck-E-Cheese. They could do with something a little less unsettling than their animatronics.”

She walked as fast as possible to the garage, holding it as far from herself as she could manage, lest it develop some other trick and zap her or something. Opening the door, she went and put it in the middle of the concrete floor before running back for the house.

“ _ Why are you being so rude?” _ it whined, “ _ what did I do wr—” _

Charlie slammed the door and locked it behind her.

She walked back to the living room and dropped onto the couch next to Aaron. They shared a glance as Charlie grabbed her phone and started to dial Carmilla.

“ _ Why are you afraid of me?” _ asked the Doctor from the TV, making the pair jump. Charlie dropped her phone onto the couch cushions. “ _ Maybe I could do something to put you at ease. The lovely people who built me taught me to sing a song, would you like to hear it?” _

Charlie and Aaron just sat in dumbfounded silence.

“ _ Daisy, daisy. Give me your answer too…” _

Aaron cocked his head. “Hey, wait a minute… Who is that? Show yourself!”

“ _ I’m sorry Aaron, I can’t do that.” _

There was the sound of a bedroom door opening upstairs and Carmilla and Laf sauntered down the stairs and into the living room, receiving the kids’ glowers.

“I always thought you kids were more down with the new fangled technology,” said Carmilla as she flopped down onto a couch.

“We’re down with it when it’s more Majel Barrett and less Hal 9000,” said Charlie.

“I could use her voice, if you’d like.”   
_ “I could use her voice, if you’d like.” _

Charlie glared at Laf as they spoke into their phone, the digitized voice on the TV speakers speaking in near sync.

“Well, colour me impressed,” said Aaron, “how much time did it take you two to, forgive the term, doctor that thing?”

“Not long actually,” said Laf, “a few hours over a couple of days to splice in a bluetooth transceiver and battery. The rest was just remote control over its normal functions.”

Carmilla held up her own phone and wiggled it.

Charlie shook her head. “You got us, dammit. Though it’s gonna be a long time before I trust one of those things again.”

“Pity,” said Carmilla, “I was kinda enjoying it, but I get it. Laf you mind taking it, you can try to frankenstein it into some other thing that shouldn’t be.”

“Done and done,” said Laf cheerfully, “so do you wanna do it or should I?”

“I’ll do it. You got to last time,” said Carmilla before turning to the kids with a smirk, “your move.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a Google home, then immediately wrote this. Inspiration comes from the oddest places.


End file.
